What is kindness
Kindness is a positive personality quality that makes a person selflessly help and treat people with care. The concept of goodness is revealed through the individual’s desire to please others with certain actions. To be kind means to always take care of others, to do something for their benefit. Here the connection between good and good can be traced. A person who does good receives true pleasure from it; he cannot do otherwise.
A synonym for kindness is virtue. This quality presupposes a person’s polite and attentive attitude towards others.
A boy gives happiness to a friend
In pedagogy, such definitions as “kindness” and “kindness” are associated with morality and ethics. But at the same time, in the explanatory dictionary of V.I. Dahl also interprets good as property and material values belonging to a person. It is no coincidence that in the old days a rich man was called kind.
The power of kindness is even seen in the fact that in the Old Slavonic alphabet one of the letters bore this name. Historians have established that the word “good” is of original Russian origin; translated from Old Slavonic it meant “oak” and was associated with strength, strength, perseverance and masculinity.
In psychology, kindness is associated with a high level of human empathy, altruism, and spiritual sensitivity. However, a person must do good wisely: his desire to please others should not negatively affect his own life. You shouldn’t take off your shirt and give it to a beggar unless you have another shirt in your closet at home.
In philosophy, kindness is part of a person’s spirituality.
Work in nature is an important means of educating humanity
In the Christian religion, much attention is paid to the eternal struggle between good and evil, because everything is known in comparison. Kindness equates to mercy. It manifests itself in the desire to help those in need. Kindness in religion is considered a spiritual quality that must be trained throughout life. The Church encourages righteous actions because they make people humane. A person who does good deeds receives love as a reward.
Islam obliges people to communicate politely with each other. This religion teaches people to help others with kind words. Kindness is an innate quality that a person must preserve and develop throughout life. This can be done if you always act according to your conscience. Islam teaches tolerance, which is also an act of kindness.
Buddhism does not contrast good and evil. The emphasis in this religion is on compassion and love, and kindness in life is a necessary condition for personal development.
In other religions, goodness and kindness are also considered signs of spirituality. God blesses a person for good deeds, because one of the names of the Almighty is Good. The ability to do good is a sign of true faith in God.
Kindness is inextricably linked with a person’s selflessness and warmth, and faith in love. If someone expects gratitude, fame and universal respect for showing kindness, then this is not a kind person, but an egoist.
Etymology of the word and its concept
In the modern understanding, the meaning of the words “good” and “kindness” is of a moral nature. However, in dictionaries of the 18th and 19th centuries, “good” is described not only as a moral manifestation of positive actions, but also materially - property, acquired property. Thus, goodness was associated with a person's accumulated wealth, and these people were called good.
The word “good” is of original Russian origin; it dates back to the Proto-Slavic language, which existed before the 5th century. Etymologists believe that the word comes from the word “oak” which in turn meant strong, courageous, stable.
It is also worth noting that the word “good” was the fourth letter of the ancient Slavic alphabet (alphabet). Each letter of this alphabet carried not just a set of sounds, but individual words that allowed people to see images and broad understanding in them.
Our ancestors considered goodness to be spiritual wealth that must be accumulated throughout one’s life. Much attention was paid to kindness, because a person’s righteous actions strengthen spiritual viability and help a person become more humane. Goodness must be given to people, for this you need to get rid of all self-interest and perform good deeds from a pure heart
Kindness is a word that has no other analogues in foreign languages, but nevertheless such a concept has always existed. Even in the times of ancient philosophy, the concept of kindness was considered part of the spiritual state of a person. In the further development of philosophy, kindness was associated with a certain benefit or benefit.
Let's look at three words, they are similar in sound and origin, but have different meanings:
- Goodness is valuable actions of a moral orientation that are associated with human actions in relation to other people or other beings.
- Kindness is a permanent human quality that involves selfless help. A person with kindness is always filled with the desire to benefit others without demanding anything in return.
- Virtue is the ability of every person to do good deeds or perform good deeds. Essentially, virtue is our desire to do good and do good deeds.
In any case, these words are aimed at bringing only benefits to others, of an emotional, spiritual or material nature.
What does true kindness look like?
Kindness manifests itself in actions. In a kind person, this character trait is reflected in all areas of life. A person's true goodness is judged by such things as:
- acceptance of one’s own individual personal characteristics
- respectful attitude towards others, manifested in tolerance;
- a person’s lack of desire to re-educate and remake those around him;
- altruistic attitude towards loved ones and colleagues;
- ability to build constructive interpersonal relationships with colleagues;
- generosity, willingness to share what a person has with others;
- lack of envy.
Is kindness a sign of strength or weakness?
Society is a dynamically developing system. Simultaneously with the development of society, a revaluation of values occurs. Several centuries ago, kindness was considered a sign of purity of soul, nobility, good manners and selflessness. But today the situation has changed. Nowadays, a kind person who readily rushes to help others and does not demand anything in return is considered a naive eccentric. Such people are often manipulated, so sometimes kindness is considered a weakness. To prevent this from happening, a kind person should not solve the problems of friends and relatives, but should help them find ways to solve their problems.
However, in educational institutions, teachers continue to form moral foundations in children. This means that kindness remains a significant social quality. Therefore, kindness and generosity can rightfully be considered a sign of strength of character: a person has a choice. He can act in a way that is beneficial to him, and benefit from his “good” deeds. Or he can selflessly help another, do something nice for a loved one.
The power of kindness is also manifested in the fact that a person not only helps others cope with life's difficulties, but also shows them ways of personal development. Helping others become better is true virtue.
Kindness is fueled by the ability to treat any person with respect and believe in his strength.
In modern reality, it is not easy for a good person to live. He is always in a situation of moral choice. By helping others, he needs to preserve himself and his resource. If he can choose the right vector of effort, then good deeds will have a positive impact on him.
Final information
Now you see what power and energy lies in true kindness. Understanding what kindness is, we become wiser. By doing good deeds, we not only help the people around us, but we ourselves become kinder, causing a response from them.
However, remember that it is better to help those who expect it from us. Otherwise, you may be disappointed in the good you have done and receive in response not gratitude, but reproaches and indignation. You should not provide unsolicited help; it is better to ask about problems and help only if they expect it from you.
Kindness is the most important part of a person’s spiritual state, which helps to interact productively with each other and be humane. Therefore, cultivate kindness throughout your life, because you can never have enough kindness. The main thing is to bring good into this world wisely, and then we will all become friendly, sincere, honest and caring.
Why is kindness needed?
To understand why kindness is needed, it is enough to imagine a person living among greedy egoists, hypocrites and envious people. It is obvious that he will not be able to become happy in such a society.
The mission of kindness lies in such significant moments as:
- helping the elderly, sick people and weak individuals;
- openness to the world and new experiences;
- social interaction will become a source of energy for a person who does good to people;
- animal care;
- respect for nature;
- development of emotional intelligence;
- gaining strength and vitality;
- knowing the limits of one’s own capabilities and designing a path of self-development;
- correct interpretation of other people's actions based on acceptance;
- conscious refusal to judge and label;
- awareness of one’s own importance, the usefulness of one’s actions;
- gaining inner strength, vital core;
- finding your calling and the best way of self-realization;
- the opportunity to build relationships with others based on altruism;
- a person will learn to distinguish good from evil, to appreciate manifestations of nobility and generosity on the part of others;
- finding happiness.
Doing good deeds protects a person from degradation. Kindness as a personality trait saves a person from infantilism and dependent behavior patterns.
Without kindness, the structure of society will collapse. Individualism will flourish. But refusing to work together will not allow a person to achieve significant results. Life will become unbearable, because everyone will think only about themselves. Such phenomena as collectivism, cooperation, empathy, mutual understanding and mutual assistance will lose their force.
Option 2
Kindness is a bright and wonderful quality. For each person this concept means something different. Kind people respect their elders and take care of them, love animals, and help orphans in orphanages. Kindness gives birth to happiness and harmony. After all, in order to be happy in this world, you do not need to have any unusual talents or have a lot of money. It is enough just to be a tolerant person. In my opinion, sincere people will never brag about their good deeds; for them, helping those in need is a common thing that does not require rewards or praise. And the one who talks about his exploits at every step is simply disingenuous and trying to raise his reputation.
It seems to me that in the modern world kindness is increasingly losing its relevance. Due to the busy rhythm of life and the eternal bustle, people in big cities have become callous and soulless. They only care about material values and careers. They will not take pity when passing by a kitten wet in the rain, they will not help grandma carry a heavy package to the bus stop, and they will not feed the birds in winter.
That's why I like to visit my grandmother in the village. There are still kind and caring people left there, from whom simplicity and happiness emanate. They may not have the opportunity to dress fashionably or travel the world, but they still love their life as it is and do good deeds, help each other and give. After all, in villages people are like one big family that will not harm its members. When I leave home, I seem to be charged with positive energy; I want to live, do good and enjoy every day.
It seems to me that many pessimistic people are unhappy because they do not want to share a part of themselves with the world around them. They withdraw into their complexes and grievances, see life only in shades of gray, and focus only on problems. Therefore, they choose the appropriate environment - the same gloomy and cold people, incapable of bright feelings. After all, we get what we deserve. But there is always a way out of almost any situation. It’s enough just to stop for a moment, look at the blue sky, at the trees, at the little children playing in the sandbox. Think about the fact that there is everything around this daily bustle except kindness and simple human happiness.
I am very glad that there are kind people in my life and I would like them to always remain like that!
Who is a kind person
Someone who has the following personal characteristics can claim to be a good person:
- the ability to empathize, sympathize, show compassion;
- responsiveness;
- caring;
- tact;
- friendly attitude in interpersonal interaction, friendly attitude towards others;
- the ability to accept a communication partner as he is, with all his advantages and disadvantages;
- a person’s lack of conviction that someone should do something for him;
- providing help to another person only when he asks for it;
- mercy;
- the ability to put oneself in another person’s place;
- emotional sensitivity;
- the ability to control your emotions and show patience;
- unselfishness;
- generosity, breadth of soul.
The old lady treats people to her harvest, she doesn’t mind
What prevents a person from being kind?
Unfortunately, not all people can be called kind. Why is this happening? What prevents a person from being kind? Psychologists identify the following reasons for this:
- people tend to compare themselves with others and experience a sense of superiority and arrogance, which interfere with the manifestation of their humanity;
- the self-esteem of most successful people, who could be kinder to others, is inflated, as a result of which they are proud of their successes and do not want to help others become successful;
- wanting to satisfy his own needs, a person ignores the needs and desires of others;
- people are not always willing to offer help to each other, because they do not want to take on extra responsibility;
- members of society view members of their class as competitors.
Can kindness hurt a person?
Sometimes doing good deeds gives rise to conflicting feelings in a person. This may happen if:
- manifestations of kindness are regarded as a self-evident social phenomenon, therefore a benevolent, sympathetic attitude is required from the individual;
- regular disinterested help, which remains without gratitude, depletes a person’s personal resource;
- if a person always helps others and does good, he risks becoming a victim of manipulation;
- excessive virtue and the desire to help when it is not asked for can offend a person, imposed care causes irritation;
- Unsolicited advice spoils interpersonal relationships;
- the desire to help a person cope with his difficulties deprives the sufferer of the opportunity to apply his own knowledge and skills to solve a difficult situation;
- When helping a friend, a person often assures him that everything will be fine, but these are empty words that may not correspond to reality (it turns out that the good helper gave his friend false hope, deceived him, disappointed him);
- some false good-natured people blackmail their victims with kindness;
- the desire to help loved ones is fraught with falling into codependent relationships.
Asya Rakhovich
Psychologist with more than 8 years of experience. Consultant on interpersonal and marital relationships, self-discovery.
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Let's try to figure out what kindness is. Many people believe that good people have a bad life because they “ride” on the good ones. Those who think so are mistaken, because they do not understand what kindness is. Kindness is a power that gives a person the ability to change the mood of the people around him from bad to good. To become truly kind, you need to be able to not only endure the pain that comes from the people around you, but respond to their negativity with love. Is it hard to be kind? But there is no easy happiness in this world. Kindness is one of the qualities of a holy person. Kindness is the mother of truthfulness, just as truthfulness is the mother of patience. Without kindness it is impossible to become a truthful person. There are four types of kindness, two of which bring happiness and two of which do not.
Spiritual kindness
Spiritual kindness is inherent in a person who sees a soul in himself and in other living beings, and then he becomes like a relative to everyone. He treats a saint, a simple or fallen person, his relative, and even a plant kindly. That is. He doesn’t care about his mother or his dog: he loves everyone, friends and enemies, indiscriminately. Understanding this category of kindness is not easy, and it is possible to practice it only if we can see the soul in everyone. Just as an artist cannot explain how a masterpiece is created, but simply says: “Well, you sit down and draw,” so a person who sees the soul says: “All living beings are dear to me, because each of them has its own unique destiny. After all, a dog also has a soul, which is eternal and was once in a human body, and then did something stupid and got the body of a dog.” He is very calm about the fact that bodies replace one another depending on the actions of the individual. A holy person sees the soul, its past and future. A holy person is calm about the fact that someone does not love him; he understands that this dislike for him is nothing more than a manifestation of the educational process that fate performs on him. Ordinary people practically do not understand people who have spiritual kindness. It is difficult for an ordinary person to understand why someone is serene in all life situations, why he does not have worries in any situation, why he is not angry with anyone, is not offended, is not angry. A calm attitude towards life is possible only if a person has learned karma, the law of cause and effect that determines our destiny. He is not nervous because he knows why the dog barks: because it is a dog, and it cannot live any other way. He knows why a drunkard drinks: because he cannot help but drink, because he is unable to cope with himself.
Kindness in goodness
This kind of kindness is more understandable than the previous one, although not for everyone, and it is more accessible to us. To begin with, this is exactly what we should strive for. Kindness in goodness implies a selfless desire to do good deeds and never do evil. A person just wants to do everything kindly. Sometimes he wants to get angry too. But since he is humble about his fate, he does not trust the negative attitude that has washed over him. Therefore, he carefully studies from the scriptures how to behave, so as not to get angry, in order to do everything kindly; He checks his entire life against the letter of the holy law.
Kindness in Passion
Kindness in passion never brings true happiness: it gives only temporary pleasure, followed by suffering. Kindness in passion is called sentimental kindness, since the person who possesses it is kinder to his relatives than to all other people. It is precisely the relatives who will cause such a person the most suffering. Therefore, while he does good deeds to his relatives, in the depths of his mind he will deeply hate them for riding on him. This person is very weak-willed, as he is strongly attached to the pleasures he receives from his loved ones, and therefore cannot be strict with them. Because of all this, bad manners, rudeness and deceit flourish around him. He is proud of his kindness and constantly points it out to everyone.
Kindness in Ignorance
Kindness in ignorance manifests itself in the fact that a person becomes kind only for a while as a result of severe fright or shock, and then loses this quality. For example, a husband constantly beats his wife, and she decides to call the police. The husband immediately tells her: “Oh, listen, my feelings for you have changed. Please forgive me. I feel so guilty for you." He would really repent so sincerely. A woman’s heart is inclined to believe everything, and therefore the wife says: “Well, okay, I won’t call the police.” And the next day her husband beats her again. This means that he became kind only temporarily under the pressure of circumstances. In fact, this is not kindness at all, it is simply deception of yourself and others. The wife in this case also shows kindness in ignorance. She thinks: “I didn’t call the police, which means I did a good thing. I’m kind and he takes advantage of it.” What is the conclusion from all this? Kindness is not good, but evil? However, before making such a conclusion, you need to carefully study what real kindness is.
Signs of kindness...
Kindness is often confused with weakness of heart, which is a vice. There are four signs of true kindness.
A kind person: 1. easily accepts hardships and insults addressed to him; 2. tries to understand how to do good correctly; 3. treats everyone evenly and gently; 4. kind under any circumstances.
A kind person easily accepts hardships and insults addressed to him
Kind people take hardships and criticism very easily because they do not want to offend a person who is strict with them. They understand that strictness towards them is the greatest benefit, which allows them to realize what is getting in the way in life. Kind people are empathetic by nature and want everyone around them to do well. This trait should not be confused with loyalty. If a kind person hears fair criticism addressed to him, he perceives it just as easily as unfair attacks. He understands that it is difficult to immediately determine whether the claims brought against him are groundless. Of course, the first reaction of every person to any severity is irritation and defense. However, a person who is kind by nature, knowing this, does not try to resist severity and fight back. He is always open to criticism, realizing that it is good for him. Then, when he realizes that the criticism against him was groundless, he will try not to have any special complaints against the person who criticized him; This is how he trains himself to be humble. A good person understands that unfair criticism is the result of his past unpious actions. An angry person perceives any criticism as a grave insult to himself. A kind person treats critical people with respect. In order to avoid any reason for another surge of negativism, he tries not to build too close relationships with negative, critical people. This is how a good person behaves. If the complaints against him turned out to be not unfounded, then he is very grateful to the person who reprimanded him, and this is also a sign of a kind heart. Some people accumulate good deeds and thoughts, others accumulate evil ones. A person who accumulates good deeds feels that there is happiness and is sober about his future. A person who accumulates evil deeds feels that the world is bad, that there is no happiness, but he thinks that in the future he will naturally become better. The super soul (voice of truth) from within shows honest people their real future. Deceitful people see their future in a false light. Code a person who realizes that happiness exists. He experiences some kind of deprivation, he understands that it will only cleanse him and there will be even more happiness in the future. When hardships come to an evil person who does not accumulate good deeds, he begins to get nervous, thinking: “Lord! How long can you suffer? I’m tired of everything in the world, I wish there was a bright, cloudless future.”
A good person strives to understand how to do good deeds correctly
Kindness is manifested in accordance with a person’s knowledge of what is good and what is bad. A good person strives to understand how to act correctly in life.
A gentle character may prompt a person to give an alcoholic money for drinking. But if a person, strengthening his mind, begins to analyze whether he did the right thing, then he will think about what will happen to this alcoholic in the future. By studying the scriptures, he will understand that he has committed a wrong, evil act. What will he understand? Firstly, he will understand that this alcoholic, with such an attitude towards him, will begin to believe that everyone should give him money for vodka. Secondly, his relationship with this person will deteriorate, because if the next day he does not give the alcoholic money, then he will no longer consider yesterday’s benefactor good. If you first give and then don’t give, it means ruining the relationship. In addition, as a result of this alms, the alcoholic will begin to drink more and subsequently become drunk, otherwise, perhaps, he would have endured it. Thus, according to the Vedas, in this case an evil act was committed, not a good one. Then what to do? Just show the drunk out the door? This is also an evil act. What to do when a drunk neighbor rings the doorbell and asks for a drink? If you slam the door, it’s bad, if you give money, it’s also bad. Only a kind person can understand how to act in this case. A person with a soft heart will not give money for drinking, but will feed an alcoholic and say a kind word to him. It turns out that a kind person will not be able to slam the door and will not give money. The only thing he can do is let a person into the house and say: “I have lunch, let’s have lunch together.” So he feeds his neighbor, and he tells him: “Well, give me some money.” However, this was not the case - the one who fed the guest did a good deed, and the power of justice is on his side, the bad karma has been worked out. And the man says: “You know, I won’t give you money for vodka, because I don’t want you to drink yourself to death. If you want, come to me again, and we’ll have lunch again.” And the neighbor will have no reason to blame this person, because he was treated kindly, and from a favorable attitude, perhaps his mind will awaken and he will want to stop drinking. It is not easy to do good; for this you need to have inner rigor and fortitude. To do this, you need to have knowledge of how to act in different life situations. A good person strives to understand how to behave correctly according to the scriptures. A good person gains sobriety and understands that the scriptures do not lie, that they teach a happy life. Having a sensitive heart, he can easily figure out what to do in any situation. Therefore people will not be able to blame him for anything. So, a good person cares whether he is really doing a good deed, and for this he will study the word of God, which clearly says how to do good deeds.
A kind person treats everyone equally gently
The third sign of a kind person is that by nature he is equally gentle with everyone. This does not mean. That he doesn't love his child more than someone else's. But if two children come into the house - one of his own and someone else’s, he will think: “Someone else’s child will be offended if I take more care of my own.” Therefore, in the presence of someone else's child, he tries to take equal care of both. This is an equally kind attitude. It is quite natural that we love our child more, but in the presence of someone else’s child we need to sincerely, with all our might, try to treat both of them equally and kindly. Very kind people in such cases even care more about someone else’s child than about their own. They do this for their own upbringing and for the sake of raising their child. In order to instill good character traits in their child, they set an example for him of how to treat people. As a result, their child thinks: “My parents are good, they are kind to my friend.” How do evil people raise their children? Ignorant people say: “It’s time to sit down to eat. Why did you come with a friend? Send him quickly and sit down at the table.” Such parents will remain “without pants” because in this way they teach their children to care only about their family members. What's the problem here? The problem will come a little later. When the children leave home, the parents will find themselves outside of “their” family; for the children they will become a “foreign” family. As a result, in the same way that parents treated those who were outside their family, children will subsequently treat their parents. Moreover, they will beg from them: “You know, mom, we don’t have money. We’re young, we need it, come on!” When mom becomes weak, they will tell her: “We don’t have money, but you have enough crackers. You don’t need much, you’re already old.” Since there is no kindness in selfish families, children grow up cruel in them, despite the fact that their parents devoted their whole lives to them. The result of selfish relationships: feel sorry for the children or don’t feel sorry for them - they will then slam the door in your face. So, kind people are equally gentle with everyone, but they are often strict with their loved ones. However, this severity is only external, since kindness always sounds in their voice. A kind person has a strong mind and when duty requires it, he tries to look stern, but even during punishment his voice still remains kind. This is the only way you should raise your children. However, this style of parenting is not available to evil people.
A kind person is kind in any circumstances
The fourth sign of a kind person is that his kindness always manifests itself, even when it is fraught with trouble for him. For example, someone is disliked by the entire team; this person felt bad, and everyone rejoiced: “Oh, wonderful! Our little darling is dying.” But a kind person will boldly begin to help the outcast. He doesn’t care that his actions are not approved by the team. To someone who reproaches him, a kind person will say in a kind way: “I would help you too if you were feeling bad. I help everyone." This is how a kind person gains genuine respect from others. A kind person cannot be frightened by a bad attitude, because he treats everyone kindly, and his conflict with the team naturally fades away. A kind person is truly free from gossip and dissatisfaction from his colleagues, everyone respects him. However, the same cannot be said about the weak-willed person everyone rides on.
Source…
Series of messages “We know this...”:
What we know about, but do not always give it meaning...
Part 1 - Kindness... Part 2 - Types of kindness... Part 3 - Truthfulness (the voice of conscience) Part 4 - Criticism and condemnation interfere with happiness... ... Part 14 - The spiritual ability not to criticize... Part 15 - Criticism and ego... Part 16 - Criticism and dissatisfaction ...
How to become kind
If desired, a person can cultivate kindness in himself. To do this you need:
- Learn to treat people carefully. Selfish attitudes must be left in the past. Communication should be based on politeness and gratitude for pleasant moments in communication. There is no need to be embarrassed to say words of gratitude to your comrades. It is also important to learn to express sympathy and share his grief with a person.
- Anyone who has decided to become a kind person needs to smile more often. A smile can radically change thoughts. Transformation of thoughts entails changes in actions. Doing good deeds with a smile is easy and pleasant.
- The predominance of material values over spiritual ones makes a person petty and mercantile. It is important to cultivate spirituality within yourself. For this, it is useful to practice meditation and yoga.
- It is useful to constantly engage in self-knowledge. This allows a person to sensibly assess his resources in a critical situation when someone needs help.
- If a person is focused on obtaining material gain, he needs to change his thinking. Selfish motives cannot force an individual to help someone. Only an altruistic principle can force a person to help someone for free.
- Cultivating kindness requires a person to have high self-control and self-discipline. It is important to learn to promptly recognize the emergence of such feelings as pride, envy, anger and work through them. When negative emotions are processed, there will be room in the heart for good and bright things.
- If negative feelings arise frequently, you need to find an effective, constructive way to deal with them. This could be systematic exercise, walks in the park, handicrafts or general cleaning. All of the above activities will help normalize the emotional state and restore personal virtuous resources.
- It is important for a person to learn to adjust his self-esteem. Virtue and arrogance are incompatible.
A wise old man tells a girl about virtue
- Anyone who decides to do good needs to learn to rejoice in the successes of others. Envy is a bad helper in good deeds. People around you should not be viewed as competitors.
- You can discover a virtuous resource within yourself if you read fiction that describes the good deeds of this or that hero. Of course, it is easier to develop an individual’s interest in quality literature in childhood than in adulthood, but this does not mean that books about kindness will not help a person become noble and generous.
- When communicating with colleagues and friends, you need to monitor your speech and choose your words for critical remarks very carefully. A carelessly spoken word or remark can hurt a person.
- The ability to forgive offenders is the greatest skill that all people need to train. The desire for revenge destroys the good beginning in a person. The habit of judging and labeling leads to narrow-mindedness and does not allow a person to hear the silent cry for help from a loved one.
- In every person's life there are people who can rightfully be considered kind. Anyone who wants to develop this quality in themselves can imitate good-natured acquaintances. Every adult should remember that he himself is an example for the child, so he must convey socially approved behavior options.
- Participation in the volunteer movement and charity events is a great opportunity to feel useful and important for society and citizens in need.
Kindness starts with little things. A friendly smile, a compliment to the cashier at the supermarket, a woman’s heavy bags delivered to the entrance - all these are the little things that ultimately form the model of behavior of the kindest person.
Answers to popular questions about kindness
Obviously, being around a kind person is very comfortable. But what does a quality like kindness give to the “kindest” person?
Kindness as a human quality is not completely altruistic. In fact, doing good deeds is beneficial. Even if a person has no expectation of “reward,” doing good deeds for the benefit of other people is beneficial to him.
Firstly, the one who does good takes the emphasis off himself and receives a lot of positive emotions. Fears and social anxieties gradually disappear from relationships, and the level of depression decreases.
It has been proven that good deeds synthesize oxytocins - love hormones, serotonins - happiness hormones and joy hormones - endorphins.
Secondly, good deeds reduce the amount of accumulated negativity around you. Accumulated negativity leads to stress, stress leads to illness. Distracted by doing good, a person approaches in a harmonious state, he gets sick less and remains young longer.
Studies among people over 60 years of age have shown that higher life expectancy is observed among those who live a socially active life, belong to various “helping” foundations and organizations, and engage in volunteer activities.
Is kindness a sign of strength or weakness?
Everyone tends to do good deeds. Around each of us, you can find a person who does good deeds much more often than others. The attitude towards him from the outside is different. And many have a question: is his kindness a manifestation of strength or weakness?
True, sincere kindness is always a sign of strength and a spiritually developed person. People do real good deeds not from time to time, but constantly. The power of kindness lies in the fact that in response to one’s good deeds, on a conscious level, a person does not expect or hope for any benefit for himself. The fact that good will return and pay off - many know, feel, understand from their own experience. But the impulse to do something good always comes from the heart.
Sometimes a person tries to do something useful to calm himself down. Thus, it is as if he is trying to atone for his unseemly act. It happens that with his good deeds a person literally “pushes” his way to his intended goal. There can be no definite answer here - this is human strength or weakness.
Real goodness is a reasonable balance of actions, deeds, words, feelings that benefit everyone. To be a kind person who makes decisions with our hearts, of course, we must be strong.
If you feel that you want to do good to people, it is not necessary to take any “targeted” actions in relation to someone specific.
Wise people say this: put the good in a visible place - whoever needs it will take it himself.
Can kindness bring disappointment to a person?
A common question concerns whether kindness can cause harm and disappointment to a person.
We do good deeds from the bottom of our hearts. If good deeds are done unselfishly, then a person will definitely receive his portion of happiness in return.
At the same time, when giving something, a person expends energy and strength. At a subconscious level, a person waits for “encouragement” - an adequate reaction, as a reward for what he gave.
Unfortunately, people often take for granted kind, selfless deeds addressed to them: they forget to thank or smile in return, they are inattentive to the people from whom they received something.
Let me give you a simple example. We all love to receive gifts: for holidays, birthdays or just because. And among us there are many who love to give gifts, delighting their loved ones. And when those to whom we give are satisfied and thank us for the gift, then our souls become warm and joyful, we receive our portion of “encouragement.” On the contrary, when our gift is taken for granted and no words of gratitude are addressed to us, we feel disappointed.
The kindness, warmth and attention given remain unaccepted, unnecessary or unimportant. After this, a person may become disappointed and lose the desire to help, give, and please others.
And although it is believed that true kindness is selfless, it is necessary to be attentive and grateful to the good, bright deeds of other people. Moreover, if these actions are targeted at us.
Can kindness and anger be combined in one person?
Good and evil are two opposite categories. Philosophy determines the close relationship between good and bad in life. Evil has traditionally been classified as a category associated with negative emotions and harm to others.
Every cloud has a silver lining - not a simple Russian proverb, but to some extent a life moral. In every evil action you can find a piece of good. And vice versa - in good deeds you can find something that is evil for someone.
We evaluate the same action differently. Some people find a good beginning in it, while others associate it with absolute evil.
Let me give you an example that is quite harmless. One day, an unfamiliar woman approached a friend of mine on a busy street and quietly whispered that her tights were torn in a visible place. And my friend had an important meeting coming up in a couple of minutes. She had neither the time nor the opportunity to do anything. The result is that the important meeting was unsuccessful. A friend of mine blames everything on the woman who came in at the wrong time with her “kind” remark, spoiled her mood, deprived her of confidence, and so on. Although the woman who pointed out the problem clearly had good motives.
Does kindness cure loneliness?
Lately there has been a lot of talk about the problem of loneliness. Despite the fact that loneliness is a subjective feeling based on the person’s personal experiences, the existence of a problem should be recognized.
Experts say that kindness cures loneliness. Kindness is openness and a willingness to give. The goodness around you reduces the “split” with the outside world. Good received from others increases the value of a person himself. The kindness that we give to other people returns to us with warmth and joy, increases self-esteem, strengthens mutual understanding, and makes us see the good in life.
In any new place, in an unfamiliar city, it is easy to start relationships and establish social and friendly contacts through good deeds and deeds. You must also allow other people to do good for you. Psychologists have long proven that a person subconsciously becomes attached to someone for whom he has done a good deed. In a powerful quote from Saint-Exupéry, we are “responsible for those whom we have taught.”
What is the difference between kindness and mercy?
We can say that kindness is the best thing in a person. A person does good deeds at the behest of his soul and the call of his heart. A kind person shows care and compassion for other people. A kind person shows mercy towards another person.
Kindness and mercy are closely related qualities. The desire to provide help, express support, and show mercy comes from a good heart.
Mercy is a reaction to some event. Kindness is a more comprehensive and general understanding of the expression of a person’s spiritual qualities. Mercy - pity, compassion, forgiveness - is one of the manifestations of kindness. Mercy is the ability to have pity on one's neighbor as oneself.
Kindness is a wonderful feeling that makes a person’s soul full. And mercy is the action of a good soul.
How are love and kindness related?
Sincere kindness is what opens, attracts, connects and fills the hearts of people with feelings. The harbinger of love for a person is always kindness.
There is no love without kindness. Both must not only be taken, but also given. When you love, you sincerely wish the best for your loved one. Doing a kind deed, showing attention to your loved one, helping, sharing his joy or sadness with him - all this is natural in relation to those you love.
It has been proven that long-term relationships between two people are built on love, mutual respect and kindness towards each other. When you are around a kind person, other people are more likely to feel happy.
Goodness forms love for a person, for people and for life. A kind attitude towards oneself and others is characteristic of harmonious and morally highly developed people, capable of real deep feelings.
Examples of kindness in life
There are many examples of kindness in everyday life:
- A new employee was hired for the position of general manager, although one of the company’s employees was counting on a promotion. But by nature he was kind, so he did not envy the new employee. Instead of being hostile to him, he tried to help him, introduced him to the specifics of the work and legal acts. The initial good attitude towards the new employee eventually grew into a strong friendship.
- Returning home from school in winter, the girl saw a puppy on the porch, shivering from the cold. She was afraid that her mother would not allow her to take the dog home, but she couldn’t leave the baby on the street to die. The girl brought the puppy home. Together with his mother, they tried to find his owner by posting advertisements, but no one was in a hurry to take the dog. As a result, the puppy remained in this family.
A girl saved a puppy from death on the street in the cold
- The man was hurrying home from work on March 8. He dropped into the store to buy flowers for his wife and daughter. Near the flower shop table there is a boy counting coins in his palm. The man noticed that the boy was almost crying. He squatted down in front of him and asked: “Did something happen to you?” There were tears in the boy’s eyes, he quietly answered: “Today is a holiday. I wanted to buy my mother a rose, but I don’t have enough money.” Then the young man took the boy by the hand and they went into the store together. The boy chose a delicate white rose as a gift to his mother. The man nodded approvingly and paid for this flower. “Thank you, thank you!” — the boy whispered, not believing his happiness. The man smiled as he looked at him.
Quotes from famous people
Many famous people have paid attention to the importance of kindness as a social phenomenon, as evidenced by their statements:
- “If a person is kind, it doesn’t matter what he’s wearing” (G. Freytag);
- “When a person does good, his soul rejoices” (Plautus);
- “Children learn kindness in the family” (V.A. Sukhomlinsky);
- “Kindness is the wonderful music of the soul” (R. Rolland);
- “Doing a good deed is the best reward for it” (R. Emerson);
- “The ability to do good is the greatest happiness” (D. Baer);
- “An act that was done by decree cannot be considered good” (I. Turgenev);
- “No earthly force can change the nature of kindness” (Democritus).