Charisma: what is it in simple words and how to develop it

“I don't believe in astrology. “I believe in my charisma,” Freddie Mercury once said when he was the lead singer of the rock band Queen.

During his lifetime, he attracted huge concert halls, and even now millions of people remember him. And all thanks to talent and, of course, charisma.

What is charisma and what are the signs of a charismatic person? Why is it so important and how to develop it? What books about charisma are worth reading? Surely you are asking yourself exactly these questions, and this article definitely has the answers to them!

What is charisma in simple words

There is no exact interpretation of the concept of “charisma” anywhere. This is not a special gift, but a set of specific skills that a person can develop in himself consciously or unconsciously.

For example:

self confidence;
positive attitude towards people and life;
leadership skills;
high communication skills;
reasonable generosity;
inner calm and prudence;
sociability, charm;
individuality;
high level of empathy.

Just being an empathic and thoughtful person does not mean that he is charismatic. Crowds follow charismatic people. They blow up concert halls, they have a lot of friends and are welcome in any company.

In addition, it is easier for such people to move up the career ladder: it is obvious that employers give preference to purposeful and responsive employees with excellent communication skills. They can easily convince counterparties to enter into transactions, and in general they quickly resolve difficult situations.

Charisma also plays a role in relationships. If a person always finds common topics for conversation, is interested in something and is generally considered an interesting conversationalist, he will not have any special problems in both friendship and love.

From a psychological point of view, charisma is divided into several types:

Focus charisma is the ability to show another person that you are focused only on him. Bill Clinton has this skill.
Charisma of authority is the ability to convince people that you can change their lives. For example, as Bill Gates or Elon Musk did.
The charisma of kindness is to make a person feel important, like the Dalai Lama.
The charisma of a visionary is to instill faith in people, even in the unreal. How Steve Jobs did it.

Charismatic person - who is this in simple words

A charismatic is a person who has inner strength and energy, thanks to which he can lead crowds of people.

Charisma is important not only for communication, but also for achieving certain goals in different areas of life:

career advancement;
love relationship;
policy;
education.

There are students whom teachers, all other things being equal, give preference and give higher grades than others. There are politicians who promise and do not keep their words, but people continue to believe them. There are teachers whose lessons you want to go to more than others, simply because they are more interesting. All this is nothing more than the influence of charisma on people.

Sometimes they say that charisma is the ability to manipulate people. And this statement is partly true: thanks to charisma, a person can do both good and evil deeds if he knows how to convince and lead crowds.

Takeshi Kitano - Yakuza Nightmare

The odious Japanese is perceived ambiguously in his own country. However, outside of it his authority is not questioned. The textured face of Takeshi Kitano, as if carved from stone, is quite frightening just by appearing on the screen. And there is no doubt that he knows this very well.

Otherwise, would he have directed the film “Cruel Cop,” terrifying even law-abiding citizens? His character's charisma is in full swing in every scene, manifesting itself in the most cynical way.

Takeshi Kitano

His heartless father in the film “Blood and Bones” is capable of encroaching even on the sacred - the lives of his own children, just to prove the significance of the inner beast.

However, Takeshi is not always so evil. The kind fellow “Kikudjiro” appears as the flip side of a bad character. The good-natured fool touches even those who were ready to curse him at one time.

Signs of a charismatic person

There are several external and non-verbal signs by which you can identify a charismatic person:

Sociability and openness. Such a person is always happy to meet people and can support any topic of conversation. He has many interesting ideas, and positive energy is felt in his every action.
Uniqueness is the ability to live without regard to the opinions of others. A charismatic person does everything the way only he needs, as long as it does not violate the interests of other people.
Neat appearance, neatness. This is not always a sign of charisma, but looking your best makes it much easier to charm people.
Sensitivity – the ability to listen to other people, empathize with their problems, and give the right advice (when asked).
Confidence. A charismatic person has no special complexes about his appearance. Even if they happen, he tries not to pay attention to them or work to eliminate the cause.
High level of self-control. In any situation, the charismatic “keeps his face” and does not become despondent in front of the public, even if his whole life has fallen into the abyss at that moment.
Oratory skills. A charismatic person always conveys his message to people clearly and clearly, and they listen to him. And they want to hear.

If there is a charismatic person next to you in the crowd, you will definitely feel it. At a minimum, you will periodically look at him, and at maximum, you will want to get to know him and start a conversation. At the same time, you will not be able to explain why exactly this person attracted you and why you paid attention to him.

Characteristics of this type of power

The set of distinctive properties as a characteristic of charismatic power is manifested in the following points:

Extremely pronounced personal character.
Ahistorical, that is, the leader often does not adhere to any stereotypes, rules, or even laws that existed previously.
Alienation of charismatic power from purely practical and everyday problems, in particular from the economy. Indiscriminate methods in dealing with economic problems - often the charismatic government prefers not to collect taxes, but to take away funds, confiscate and expropriate them, trying to give these actions a legal appearance.

What is charisma in a woman?

If you see a completely ordinary girl next to a tall, handsome man, and it’s clear from their relationship that he carries her in his arms and loves her very much, most likely it’s a matter of her charisma. She has charm and her own “zest”.

Women are characterized by their own special signs of charisma, which are less common in men:

playfulness;
romance;
immediacy.

A charismatic woman also has self-esteem and the ability to clearly indicate her desires. She doesn’t make a scandal just because her husband bought the wrong brand of oil or came home half an hour later than usual. And in general, her husband will run home from work, without stopping anywhere, because he knows: it’s good and calm there. Charismatics try to build relationships where there is no place for hysterics and negativity, and all problems are resolved through calm discussion.

A man will always want to be close to a woman who clearly defines her boundaries and declares her desires, without allowing herself to be treated with disdain. But on one condition: they will support him in a difficult situation, listen to him when he feels bad and will not make trouble for no reason.

There are also personality traits that are important for a career. For example, the ability to convince and listen to your interlocutor, get out of difficult situations, argue your opinion in disputes, maintain good relationships in a team.

“She was ugly, but she used her plainness so skillfully that even the most beautiful girls recognized her as a dangerous rival.” Ayn Rad, from the book “We are the Living.”

Mickey Rourke is a warrior for life

The charming, handsome man, the silent heartthrob, did not begin his career on the stage. No, he was still drawn to the top, but he decided to climb it through the ring. A dozen professional fights sufficiently strengthened Mickey Rourke’s character for him to light his star in the Hollywood firmament.

Mickey Rourke

His character from Rumble Fish was remembered for his romantic nature. The older brother's philosophical reflections only added points to the popularity of the rising supernova. Then there was “Angel Heart” with the master of the acting workshop - Robert De Niro. However, we really fell in love with him after 9 1/2 Weeks. It was there that the charismatic handsome man showed all his photogenic features.

Robert DeNiro

Mickey's subsequent career faded somewhat due to drug addiction. However, the fighter's return in the drama "The Wrestler" was a testament to the actor's extraordinary spirit. Moreover, at a certain point he decided to return to the world of boxing to regain his face. Since the latter suffered considerably due to unsuccessful plastic surgeries...

What is charisma in a man?

In all sorts of pickup courses, men are taught to meet and start relationships with women using various psychological techniques. But they will never work if the man doesn't have charisma.

A man’s charisma in a relationship is a combination of qualities that most often attract women:

attentiveness;
ability to listen and hear;
reliability;
responsibility;
interest in communication;
determination;
sense of style;
confidence in yourself and your actions.

When it comes to a career, a certain persistence, self-confidence and all other qualities that are also characteristic of women are important for men.

“You just have to be charismatic and talk to people, even if you don’t want to. Put on a happy face and go. Be bolder. Don't be a weakling." – Evan Peters, American actor.

Marlon Brando - the king of actors

This man has earned the unofficial title of the best American actor of the twentieth century. His roles are as famous as his scandalous antics, and his animal sexuality once drove all women crazy. One has only to remember the film “A Streetcar Named Desire” and the image of a brutal male in a sweaty T-shirt immediately appears.

The thin line between beast and man was his curse, but at the same time his gift. Marlon Brando was not afraid to show his strength, because he knew for certain about its capabilities.

Marlon Brando

The magnetic rock had a flawless effect on everyone, and therefore he was allowed a lot. In Francis Coppola's epic saga, he was practically crowned when other characters were allowed to kiss the godfather's hand.

Subsequently, his devilish essence periodically burst out, bringing movie lovers into awe. The emergence of evil in human form from the gloomy shadows of “Apocalypse Now” fascinates with its irrationality, the attractiveness of Mephistopheles. The devil definitely has his own charisma.

How to understand whether you are a charismatic person or not

In different areas of life, charisma is defined differently:

In a love relationship. If they value you, say that it’s interesting to be with you, and try to spend more time with you, you probably have charisma. In addition, charismatics are much more likely to be noticed by people of the opposite sex than others.
At work. If you are often asked for help, your manager is interested in your opinion on various issues, and in general you feel like a significant part of the company, most likely, it’s all about not only your professionalism, but also your charisma.
In friendship. If you often have guests, friends constantly invite you to all sorts of events, and in general you are the life of the party - this indicates a high level of charisma.

There are other signs by which you can understand whether you are charismatic or not:

open attitude towards people;
the desire to always achieve results and complete what was started;
honesty and sincerity;
complete dedication to what you love.

There are certain skills that charismatic people tend to use. If you know a lot of interesting stories and anecdotes, know how to ask rhetorical questions in a timely and correct manner, and have unshakable moral convictions, you are probably one of them.

A simple charisma test

It can be difficult to determine whether a person is charismatic or just a matter of charm. But you can take tests yourself that will give you a clearer understanding. They can be found on the Internet.

There is also a test by H. Friedman, a professor at the University of California. It is considered more or less reliable and consists of 13 points.

For each statement, add from 1 to 9 points depending on how close it is to you. For example, 9 points – definitely about you, 5 – 50/50, 1-3 – not at all about you.

These are the questions:

I am prone to tactile contact if I like the person.
When I laugh, those around me inadvertently start laughing too, even if they don’t know the reason for my laughter.
I easily express my emotions: both in real communication and on the phone.
I have expressive facial expressions.
I like to stand out from the crowd.
I often touch my interlocutor during a conversation.
I like to be the center of attention.
People often tell me that I would make a good actor.
I love playing games where you have to pretend to be someone. For example, in "Crocodile".
At entertainment events I am usually the center of attention.
If desired, I can make my eyes and voice seductive.
I start dancing every time I hear good music. Even if I'm on the street.
I am not shy around strangers.

The average level of charisma is from 56 to 86 points. It is typical for most people. Anything below 56 is a low level. Only a few get scores above 86.

Examples of charismatic people

Both positive and negative leaders can be charismatic, using their talent for harmful purposes.

The positive ones include:

Charlotte Gainsbourg. She herself has repeatedly said that she does not like her own appearance. But director Lars von Trier has a different opinion, and quite often invites the actress to star in his films.

Uma Thurman. She is tall, has size 42 feet, a heavy look and a large forehead, but this did not stop her from starring in several films by Quentin Tarantino.

Lady Gaga. The singer, on the contrary, is short in stature, and in childhood she was considered an “ugly duckling.” However, it is known all over the world and always attracts full houses.

Adriano Celentano. The actor hardly meets modern beauty standards, but still remains a favorite of the public, including women. Even after 80 years.

This list can also include Elon Musk, Bill Gates, and many other famous personalities.

A striking example of negative charisma is Adolf Hitler. Yes, he knew how to persuade and gathered a huge army, his followers stood behind him like a mountain, but nothing good came of it. He caused a lot of pain both to the German people and to the whole world.

Clint Eastwood is a national treasure

The monumental figure of the hero of Westerns found its best embodiment in Clint Eastwood. His phlegmatic face with a tenacious gaze warns of danger better than any pistol. It was not heroic stunts that determined Clint's popularity on the screen.

Moreover, his characters are sometimes distinguished by immoral behavior, which should repel the viewer... However, in the case of a charismatic personality, everything happens exactly the opposite. Clint Eastwood is distinguished not only by his height and hackneyed role. He became a famous director who made dozens of powerful films.

Clint Eastwood

His contribution can be felt in every idea of these paintings, since the core of Clint can be traced extremely easily. Even denying his love for humanity (remember “Gran Torino”), he comes to its defense on occasion.

A strong hand, a well-aimed shot - thanks to these on-screen discoveries, he became a symbol of the US republican idea. And judging by the persistence of his ward in “Million Dollar Baby,” money is far from the main thing for him. Honor and dignity are what holds his spine.

Examples of positive and negative charisma

Let's look at some practical examples of positive charisma:

The manager knows how to organize work competently. There is a calm atmosphere in the team, all problems and issues are resolved one-on-one with those concerned. When discussing shortcomings in his work, he never gets personal. The team tries to work towards results, if only for the sake of not upsetting them.
The coach gathers a lot of people for intensive courses and courses, knows how to present information competently, and treats people sensitively and with understanding. As a result, clients’ self-esteem increases, they find a purpose in life, and get rid of tension.
A volunteer helps refugees who fled the war. As a result, people are drawn to him, knowing that they will at least receive moral support.

Sometimes charisma is not enough - in some situations it is also important to know psychological techniques. But pure psychology without charisma will not work 100%.

Negative charisma is the ability to manipulate people to achieve your goals. Most often – selfish ones. Such a leader knows how to persuade, but as a result, everything turns out to have negative consequences for those who succumbed to manipulation.

Types of power

Considering the concept of “power” as a general sociological category, it is customary to distinguish three types of management. This is legal (legal-rational), traditional, charismatic power. In science they are usually called ideal types. Such a division was once proposed by the famous German sociologist and historian M. Weber. It is necessary to note that charismatic leaders often have two sociological characteristics: they are mostly people from the periphery, and sometimes even citizens of another state, and in almost one hundred percent of cases they come to power not by legal means, but through usurpation or as a result of existing critical circumstances.

How to develop charisma in yourself?

You can enroll in public speaking courses, where you will learn to be the center of attention in a few months. But you can do without them if you follow a few recommendations:

Set goals and develop self-confidence.
Give a speech. She must be competent, clear and confident.
Maintain discipline.
Don't stop halfway - don't quit what you started.
Learn to treat your shortcomings ironically. Learn to laugh at your own failures, and then others will not notice them.

There is also an interesting exercise. Stand in front of a full-length mirror and talk to an imaginary audience. At first you will feel tight, but then you will see all the shortcomings: poor posture, inexpressive facial expressions. Write it down and be sure to work through it. If you do this every day for 15-20 minutes, over time you will be able to confidently speak in front of a real audience.

Toshiro Mifune - harder than steel

The best representative of samurai cinema. Despite the number of similar heroes and films, Toshiro Mifune managed to become a legend. His heroes have always been distinguished by thoughtfulness, an attempt to comprehend the true state of affairs. This invariably attracted all spectators, since the thirst for the victory of just good over hypocritical evil is rooted in each of us.

Toshiro Mifune

A favorite of the famous director Kurosawa, Mifune became his alter ego in the world of cinema. A stern, but at the same time charming man, with one blow of his blade he was able to resolve all doubts. His heroes are stingy with words, but rich in generous deeds.

For all the brutality of the image, Toshiro is distinguished by a shy smile. Yes, yes, she is awkward, like a teenager! This subtle contradiction delights his loyal female fans while men study his steely shaft. You can really learn the code of samurai honor from his roles.