Indifference is a pressing problem in modern society. Most of us daily face the problems of other people, the evil that is happening and impunity, but at the same time we remain indifferent and insensitive.
No one can be sure that if things get bad on the street, someone will call an ambulance, or if criminals attack, the police will call. And that's the best case scenario. At worst, a person who has fallen from a heart attack will be called an alcoholic, and an old beggar woman begging for alms will be called a swindler and a fraudster.
What is indifference
There are several meanings of the word “indifference,” and not all of them have a negative connotation.
The majority believes that being indifferent means being indifferent, indifferent, passive, cold-blooded, and not helping others in difficult situations.
Indifference is associated precisely with indifference and indifference to the needs of other people, and is not caused by anger or hatred. An indifferent person simply does not have a feeling of pity and, as a rule, shame or conscience.
Others talk about indifference as a tiredness of the soul. After dangerous situations, terrible or difficult events in life, a person begins to hide behind a mask of indifference in an attempt to isolate himself from new problems, suffering, even other people. Gradually this condition passes, compassion, kindness and mercy reappear.
There is such a thing as indifferentism, which manifests itself as complete indifference and indifference in the sphere of knowledge, moral aspect, and social life. It can be philosophical, ethical, religious, political.
An indifferent person tries not to notice the problems of other people. After all, if they are not visible, then they do not exist. This is the lot of small individuals
Does this person only communicate with you when it is beneficial?
A true friend will take the time to chat just because he likes you. A bad friend will try to get something from you when you spend time together. Here are signs that you are being taken advantage of:
- He only offers to meet when he wants you to give him a ride.
- Asks to borrow money and never returns it.
- Arranges for you to tell his parents or other half that you are spending time together, although he is somewhere else.
- Spends time with you only when a more interesting (for him) person is with you.
- Chooses you for a meeting when other plans have been cancelled.
- Puts pressure on you, forcing you to do something you don't want to do.
What is indifference
The words indifference and indifference are very close in definition, but there is a slight difference.
Indifference is worse than indifference. A person may not be indifferent, but indifferent to any particular topic. For example, he will readily rush to the aid of a drowning man, but will not pay attention to a hungry kitten.
An example is apathy, which is manifested by lethargy, lack of strength, emotions, motivation, and an indifferent attitude not only to others, but also to one’s own problems. Life consists exclusively of disappointment and fatigue, relationships with other people do not attract attention.
Apathy is a consequence of severe stress, emotional burnout, depression, somatic diseases, endocrine disorders, and a side effect of taking certain medications.
As a rule, no one makes the difference between indifference and indifference.
What kind of person can be called indifferent
The present time is associated with a rapid moral decline, the loss of high moral qualities and beliefs. The former principles are replaced by immorality, selfishness, and indifference.
From television screens there is a continuous stream of information about murders, wars, violence, and crimes. People gradually get used to evil and perceive it as an ordinary and everyday event.
Gradually, an indifferent attitude towards teenagers smoking and fights in the yard appears. A person begins to care more about the promotions in the supermarket than about a starving neighbor living on a minimum pension.
The problem of indifference also affects the sphere of labor relations. Responsibility for the quality of work has been replaced by the usual thirst for profit, even among civil servants, doctors, and teachers.
The behavior of indifferent people from the outside looks quite ugly, especially when healthy young men do not give way to a pregnant woman or an elderly person.
The problem of an indifferent attitude towards people is especially relevant in big cities, where the speed of life and the flow of information do not allow one to look around and pay attention to the significant problems of others.
The indifference of people is not the only negative side of modern life. The loss of spiritual qualities is accompanied by anger, hatred, irritation, swearing, fights, and intrigues. Mutual respect and understanding are lost, both between strangers and close people.
Indifference is something that was not inherent in Soviet society. We were taught to do good deeds from childhood. Being a pioneer meant helping those in need and protecting the weak. Now everyone is responsible for themselves, trying to isolate themselves from social problems.
An indifferent and indifferent person can be identified by the following characteristics:
- apathy;
- indifference to surrounding people, events, phenomena;
- lack of aspirations, goals;
- prostration;
- detachment.
Human indifference is manifested not by the stinginess of positive or negative emotions, but by their total absence.
Unlike indifferent people who shield themselves from current events, empaths are capable of conscious empathy for the psychological state of another person.
Complete indifference does not arise immediately. It is necessary to go through several stages. A person becomes indifferent to:
- Representatives of the animal world, other living beings. There is no pity or desire to help them.
- Strangers and strangers. They do not evoke compassion even in very difficult situations.
- Superficial acquaintances, including colleagues and neighbors.
- Buddies, friends.
- Close people, family.
- Own person.
At the last stage, indifference acts as a psychological defense.
Speak up directly if you notice mean, judgmental, or self-serving behavior.
There is nothing wrong with standing up for yourself and asking to be treated well, especially by someone who is considered your friend. You can say something like: “I feel like you only communicate with me when you need something, and that makes me unhappy.” How a friend reacts to your feelings will say a lot about his character. A true friend will apologize and take steps to change, but someone with a vested interest will blame you for their own mistakes.
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Why do people become indifferent
People's indifference may be a consequence of:
- individual personality factors: selfish tendencies, when a person puts his own problems first and underestimates the difficulties of others;
- life events when a person in a difficult situation did not receive help from other people and now reciprocates;
- personal experience;
- mental disorders: psychopathy, mental retardation in the absence of development of certain parts of the brain;
- depression;
- long-term, uncontrolled treatment with medications;
- drug use;
- alcohol addiction.
The reason for indifference in many people is a lack of determination, a favorite activity, the loss of a loved one, loneliness.
It is better not to count on the help and support of inveterate egoists. They are completely indifferent to other people's misfortune and suffering. They also will not show sincere joy at happy events, even among friends and family.
Indifference as a defense
In some cases, indifference can be seen as a psychological defense. The reason for this condition is strong nervous tension associated with a stressful situation and negative emotions. The person becomes indifferent, indifferent, and does not want to do any business. It seems to him that any efforts to reduce the influence of stress factors are pointless.
This kind of indifference is the result of a protective reaction of the body. With a strong shock, psychic energy is consumed. After its completion, the nervous system needs to replenish the wasted energy, which is accompanied by inhibition processes. Otherwise, the person would be subject to nervous exhaustion, which threatens health. At the same time, this condition is unfavorable; every effort must be made to get out of it.
Indifference and alexithymia
Indifference may be a consequence of alexithymia - a psychological condition in which a person is incapable of recognizing and understanding his feelings, emotions, and experiences. Accordingly, he is not characterized by empathy, and understanding the psychological state of another person is inaccessible. He does not regret, does not empathize, does not sympathize due to objective reasons.
People suffering from alexithymia report that they cannot fully feel their emotional state. Feelings of anger and joy are equally insipid.
The negative condition can be congenital or acquired. If a person is born with alexithymia, it becomes noticeable in childhood.
Acquired alexithymia is a temporary condition. Her reasons:
- severe psychological trauma;
- stress;
- long-term depression;
- aggressive environment.
The appearance of indifference is often facilitated by parents who are not sufficiently familiar with child psychology. Every child needs warmth, attention and love. Otherwise, emotional problems cannot be avoided in the future. Children should not learn to hide their feelings, and their experiences should be taken seriously, despite their absurdity and unimportance for adults.
Is your friend too involved in your personal life?
It's normal for friends to be aware of some intimate details. But if a friend insists on giving him as many details as possible or tries to become a part of your personal relationship, this is not normal. Perhaps this person is jealous or wants to control you too much. If he doesn't respect your boundaries and decisions, and gets angry if you spend time away from him or with someone without him, that's a pretty worrisome sign.
Remember that true friendship takes time to develop. If a new friend insists that he needs to know everything about you right away so you can be closer, take a step back.
Scientific research into feelings of indifference
How to understand indifference has been studied by numerous psychologists and philosophers: Fabry, Rubinstein, Spinoza, etc.
Scientific research has revealed that indifference is comparable to apathy, emotional passivity, lack of purpose, lack of interesting activities, and decreased overall activity.
At the end of the twentieth century, N. Fetiskin and A. Chebykin found that lectures and lessons did not meet the expectations of students. Positive emotions replace boredom or fear of the teacher.
In the dictionary of Meshcheryakov and Zinchenko, indifference is called “emotional-motivational paralysis.”
Indifference has two forms. The first is characterized by depression and sadness against the backdrop of a lack of interest in current events surrounding people. The second is disguised behind successful human activity.
Why is indifference dangerous?
There are several reasons why it is bad to be indifferent. This is, first of all, a negative moral aspect, indicating spiritual callousness and lack of empathy for one’s neighbor.
What does society's indifference to people lead to?
Life for an indifferent person quickly loses its attractiveness. In addition to reputational damage, loss of friends, social isolation, he dooms himself to complete loneliness.
You cannot count on the help of other people if you have not at one time supported them in a difficult situation and shown mercy. Evil, like good, always returns.
However, people cannot be left without support if their condition is associated with problems of a physical and psychological nature. They themselves need help.
The dangers of indifference in the family
Indifference in the family is dangerous for all household members.
It, along with inconsistency and aggression, can kill a child’s trust and sense of security in the world around him. Internal motivation will be absent. In addition, children imitate the behavior of their parents and may grow up to be callous people devoid of mercy.
If there is mutual indifference or indifference of one spouse to the other, full-fledged family relationships are impossible. A person is not interested in the second partner: his location and occupation, well-being, state of mind. Feelings, including physical attraction, are absent.
In such situations, a frank conversation or the help of a psychologist can help.
Mutual understanding with loved ones is the basis of warm and healthy relationships
It is unlikely that geneticists will tell us the gene that is responsible for philanthropy. Although you can often hear that indifference is inherited. Why do people tend to think this way? It's very simple: children who grow up in families in which there is no mutual understanding and support between parents become cold-blooded and selfish over time. As they say, a bad example is contagious.
They say that for everyone in the family to be happy, the mother must be happy. Unfortunately, many couples live for years, studiously not noticing each other. Their feelings have long since cooled down; the daily routine is the most ruthless mechanism, capable of turning living people into robots, performing the same actions day after day simply because it is necessary. Why should you be afraid of indifferent people living together? Because it is children who suffer first of all from their indifference.
Remember how often you have witnessed the aggressive behavior of someone else's child. Believe me, these are still flowers. He shows aggression because he is deprived of the love of his parents. His natural desire to attract attention is screaming, rage, aggression in all kinds of forms. However, what is worse than these open manifestations is when a child loses hope of being heard. And this is almost the same as losing the hope of being loved, depreciating in your own eyes.
The consequences of the lack of affection and love from parents are the saddest. The child withdraws into himself, ceases to show interest in the world around him, he begins to lag behind his peers or, conversely, becomes too immersed in the study of literature, music, etc. on depressive topics. At best, he will grow up to be an indifferent person; at worst, it can lead to suicide in adolescence.
How to deal with indifference
Initially, the main thing is to realize your condition. Then you need to:
- Concentrate on positive moments, think about them, and remember them in difficult situations.
- Devote time to friends more often, take an interest in their lives, attend cultural events.
- Maintain an active lifestyle, normalize your diet, get proper rest, and get enough sleep.
- Find hobbies.
- Gain new knowledge and change jobs if necessary.
- Become a volunteer.
Cute pets will not leave even the most hard-hearted people indifferent.
If none of the methods help, you need to consult a psychologist.
