There is probably no person who is not familiar with the word “charisma”. They talk about charisma, wanting to highlight someone, to emphasize their natural charm and charm. Often this word appears in various thematic articles dedicated to famous people. It is often abused by spectators and theater critics when praising the work of an artist.
Despite its widespread use in speech, this term remains a mystery to many people. What it is? How did this concept come about? What does the word itself mean? Few are willing to answer these questions. And even fewer people are ready to list the qualities that make a woman charismatic.
What is it? Concept
It is impossible to understand what a charismatic woman means without an idea of the general meaning of the term.
What is “charisma”? According to the definition, this is a characteristic natural trait or a combination of them that gives a person exclusivity, endowing the individual with special qualities in the eyes of other members of society.
As a rule, the special qualities that every charismatic woman possesses are attractiveness, charm, charm, exceptional visibility in any environment. Of course, personal characteristics can also lie in other things, for example, spirituality or passion for something.
Best books: world TOP-5
These books are extremely popular in Russia and the world. They are memorized from cover to cover by business trainers, they are actively quoted by teachers of the best universities on the planet.
TOP 5 best books on developing charisma and charm:
- “Lead People” by David Novak;
- "Charisma. How to Influence, Persuade and Inspire” Olivia Fox;
- “Leader’s Charisma” Radislav Gandapas;
- “The power of charm. How to win hearts and achieve success" Brian Tracy;
- "Charisma. The Art of Successful Communication" Alan and Barbara Pease.
Don't limit yourself to these publications - you can't read 5 books and become a charismatic person.
Constantly follow new products, attend effective trainings, and show more initiative. Take advantage of what you read. Try to use the advice of experts and include the exercises they recommend in your workouts.
Are charisma, character, habits and beauty related concepts?
What is a charismatic woman? Blonde or brunette? Fat or thin? Stylish or not? Sloppy or neat? Independent or dependent? The list of such questions can continue indefinitely, but there will be only one answer to any of them. This answer is any.
Charisma is a quality that has nothing to do with appearance, habits, occupation, or ability to dress.
Both a rare beauty and an ugly woman can be charismatic. A woman who earns millions may not have charisma, just like a housewife. Charismaticness is a special innate talent, a gift to a person from nature, completely independent of how he looks or lives. A charismatic woman is one who knows how to attract attention to herself naturally, without making an effort.
Charm of speech
An indispensable feature of a charming person is correct speech . It must be clear, intelligible and measured, because few people are interested in listening to inexpressive speech.
And although speaking talent , you can still learn to speak beautifully on your own.
Recite poetry in front of a mirror as if you were an actress in front of a full hall of listeners
The following exercises are useful for developing clear speech:
- reciting poetry
- conversation in front of the mirror
- reading tongue twisters
- chanting sounds
It is very important not only to be able to pronounce all sounds beautifully and clearly, but also what you say . Competent speech is one of the main attributes of a charismatic person. In order for speech to be harmonious and filled with meaning, it is necessary:
- eliminate parasitic words from the vocabulary
- pay attention to self-development and reading books
- do not use words whose meaning you do not know
- use the richness of your native language: comparisons, exquisite metaphors, sayings
- try to be pleasant to your interlocutor: spice up your speech with humor and compliments
While telling a joke, it will relieve tension and set you up for warm, friendly communication.
About the word “charisma” itself
The word itself is of Greek origin. Literally translated, χάρισμα means “gift from the gods.” In Greek, it was used to denote a person’s ability to attract attention to one’s own person.
This word was also used by Christians from the first years of the formation of religion. It is present in the texts of the New Testament and is understood as grace given to man by God. Catholicism has its own definition of this concept. According to him, charisma is a special spiritual quality, a property sent down to people by God.
Is it possible to learn charisma?
How to become a charismatic woman and is it possible to do it? According to the traditional conservative view, shared by most sociologists, philosophers and psychologists, this quality cannot be learned; it is an innate talent, like the ability to paint or the timbre of the voice.
But not everyone shares this understanding of charisma. There is another understanding of the very nature of this property of the human personality. According to him, charisma is not a unique talent inherited from ancestors or bestowed from above, but simply the result of a certain type of nonverbal behavior.
Accordingly, by learning certain techniques and turning them into a reflex, a habit, it is quite possible to become a charismatic person.
The charm of success
We all strive for some kind of achievement, some consciously, and some only at the subconscious level. Therefore, everyone is interested in someone who has achieved something in life, as an example of success, a source of valuable life advice, or an incentive to move forward and not stop there.
A successful person is the personification of the good life and well-being that each of us strives for. But this is not the only reason why successful people are so attractive . As a rule, those people who do not succeed are gloomy and depressing with their pessimism, poisoning the lives of those around them.
A successful personality is very attractive to others
Communication with such people is of little interest and even harmful, because a person who is a loser in life is unlikely to rejoice in someone else’s success, but will become a reliable shoulder in a difficult moment - he is loaded with his own personal problems.
A successful person is not burdened with the hardships of life, she does not oppress others, but moves through life with ease.
How does innate charisma differ from acquired charisma?
An innate quality is considered to be a property that a person demonstrates from early childhood. Those people who, due to their professional activities, are faced with a large number of very tiny children, notice that it is impossible to take your eyes off some babies. Of course, there can be no talk of any set of non-verbal methods of behavior in such a situation.
However, many children who did not stand out in infancy later begin to attract attention and evoke tenderness and admiration. As a rule, those behavioral features that caused delight among others are fixed in the subconscious and become reflexive.
This happens especially often with little girls, who then grow into adult women and continue to enjoy everyone's attention, just as in early childhood. Thus, to put it as simply as possible, a charismatic woman is a girl who successfully smiled or otherwise touched adults.
That is, every child can grow up with charisma, you just need to give him confidence in his own irresistibility. For example, the most charismatic women never admit the possibility that they might leave someone indifferent. These ladies don’t fight such thoughts, don’t drive them away, they simply don’t think like that. The possibility of remaining unnoticed does not initially appear in the mind of a woman with charisma. If you tell a lady who has this quality that some people are not noticed in public places, she will be very surprised.
Acquired charisma, cultivated in oneself already in adulthood, is the result of long and extremely difficult work on oneself. This work is not about controlling weight or teaching yourself to be neat, but about changing your type of thinking, breaking conditioned reflexes and stereotypes.
Acquired charisma differs from innate charisma in that the woman who possesses it, as well as the man, have a pronounced trait, a feature, with the help of which they become the epicenter of attention. This could be a sense of humor or quick reaction, the way of holding a cup or quiet, insinuating speech, the ability to play musical instruments or something else. In any case, if you have acquired charisma, you can always list the qualities that distinguish its owner from other people.
Charismatic means confident
Many women suffer from lack of self-confidence, and shyness and reticence prevent them from realizing their full potential. They are embarrassed to approach their superiors with new proposals, even if they are effective, they are afraid to take responsibility when performing complex tasks, and in the meantime, someone more confident takes the laurels for themselves. Many people associate charisma with leadership, and this is true because leaders manage to attract people to their side without much pressure, through persuasion and natural charm.
To become a confident girl, first of all, you cannot allow yourself to doubt your abilities , convincing yourself that, like everyone else, she deserves to succeed and has all the necessary qualities for this. Also, do not be afraid to take responsibility, as this can be regarded as fear, and this feeling does not fit in with charisma. It is necessary to accustom yourself to boldly face problems, not retreating from them, but doing everything to solve them quickly and effectively. Acting confidently and decisively, not being afraid of difficulties, but challenging them, is to a certain extent charismatic, since they form authority in the eyes of people.
How to acquire and develop this quality?
Charismatic women, examples of whose behavior can be observed not only in life, but also on the TV screen or on social networks, always have a zest. This is where you should start on the path to acquiring and developing this quality in yourself. That is, you should understand which properties of your own personality are most attractive to others, and begin to develop them.
There are also exercises that help women become more attractive, that is, charismatic. There is nothing complicated about them, except that you should practice regularly, even on weekends.
The first exercise is proper awakening. You need to start the day with positivity and energy, and not with a stuttering walk to the bathroom with your eyes closed. To do this, you need to wake up with plenty of time and do exercises. Any type of activity is suitable - yoga, aerobics, fitness, even meditation can set you up for a positive outlook on the day.
The second exercise is designed to develop correct posture. A charismatic woman is a person with her head up and her back straight. Slouching, as well as constantly looking at your feet, can completely ruin the impression you make on others. For good posture, you need to walk for 10-20 minutes a day with a book on your head, of course, without dropping it. And regularity is important in this exercise; you need to do it daily.
The third and extremely important activity is talking out loud with a mirror, that is, with your reflection. The topic of the monologue is not so important; the main thing is to conduct the conversation out loud. This method will help overcome shyness, and also contribute to the formation of control over the timbre of the voice and the style of speech. A good addition is to record your monologues and then listen to them. Of course, by looking in the mirror, you can learn to control your facial expressions and gaze.
General Tips
As has already been said, anyone can acquire charisma if they wish. When setting a course for achieving success, you should use the following recommendations from social psychologists:
- Support others. What is the difference between weak-willed and envious people? Because they mercilessly criticize the more successful, and also instill uncertainty in those who are trying to change their lives for the better. Charismatic and strong natures are different. They do not skimp on compliments, provide support, and encourage you in difficult times.
- Don't try to please everyone. There is no need to look for approval on the side and pay attention to spiteful critics. Anyone who has managed to cultivate charisma in himself does not need to be liked by everyone. As they say, you won't be nice to everyone.
- Don't let yourself be offended. A charismatic leader will not allow himself to be insulted and will never follow the lead of the crowd. It is not in his principles to cowardly agree to other people's demands.
- Set goals for yourself. It is necessary to throw all your strength into realizing what you have planned, and not to float weakly with the flow, thinking that everything will fall from heaven on its own.
- Be extraordinary. A person who is not thirsty for adventure and does not take risks is boring, which means he will not be able to surprise others.
- Replenish your knowledge base. To maintain a conversation on any topic, you need to constantly expand your horizons. Books, newspapers, and visiting exhibitions and museums will help you cope with this task.
- Be a good listener. How to please your interlocutor? You need to listen to him carefully, periodically asking questions and showing interest in his life.
- Be sincere. In the modern world of hypocrisy and falsehood, people are subconsciously drawn to those who are open and do not wear a mask.
Although “charisma” is translated from ancient Greek as “God’s gift,” this set of personal characteristics is not innate. Since it is associated with internal psychological qualities and external, behavioral skills, a person can and should train it.
What else is important for developing charisma?
Before you begin to develop this quality, you need to decide what a “charismatic woman” means in your own mind. Everyone has a stereotype of this concept. You don't need to break it, you just need to conform to it.
The way you live your life is also important. It is impossible to become attractive to others if you do not like yourself. That is, you should act and look exactly the way you want. If you want to run in the park in the morning in a pink suit with rhinestones, you need to do this, and not sigh, repeating to yourself that such activities and clothes are “not for your age,” or come up with other excuses.
The charm of a smile
A smile should become your calling card if you want to be charming and charismatic. Firstly, this way you will immediately demonstrate to others that you are supportive and friendly , and secondly, there is no such person for whom a smile would not suit. Is it possible not to use such a powerful trump card ?
It is especially important for the fair sex to be blooming and smiling, because a good mood not only makes you look younger and beautifies, but is also passed on to others .
A smile is a woman's best adornment
And people who know how to cheer up attract you like a magnet and illuminate harsh everyday life like sunlight.
Do we need to take other people into account?
Charisma has nothing to do with selfishness. A woman with charisma is, as a rule, attentive to other people, as well as to everything that happens around her.
However, not a single person with this property will allow himself to be manipulated or taken advantage of. This means not only stopping attempts to sit on your neck, but also prioritizing your daily activities.
Paradoxical as it may seem, mere trifles and everyday fuss most strongly influence the way of thinking and type of behavior of women. For example, after waking up on the weekend, having done some exercise, a housewife must make a choice - cook breakfast for the family or enjoy a cup of coffee. As a rule, no one thinks about this, but simply does it. Usually women either combine both activities, or prepare breakfast and only then drink their coffee. Those who want to develop charismatic qualities in themselves should do differently. First, coffee for yourself, then breakfast for others.
Positive attitude
Having set yourself the goal of gaining charisma, first of all you need to learn positive thinking in order to appreciate every moment that life gives. People are intuitively drawn to those who talk about everyday things in a positive way. Anyone can complain about an unfair fate, but only a few can look into the future with a winning smile. Regular implementation of the following psychological techniques will help you develop the skills of charismatic behavior, and at the same time increase your self-esteem:
- Laugh at yourself. If a person is able to smile sincerely when it comes to him directly, others begin to think that he is devoid of complexes.
- Adapting your humor to different people. Once you find yourself in a company where jokes below the belt do not cause rejection, you can give free rein to your wit. When in the company of serious men or women who appreciate subtle humor, it would be more appropriate to tell a funny story that does not go beyond the bounds of decency. It’s generally better not to joke with people you don’t know well without a clear reason.
- Teasing your interlocutor. “Teasing” a close friend will help you boost your charisma and improve your communication skills. But you shouldn’t go too far, so as not to accidentally offend a friend by turning a seemingly completely innocent joke into an insult.
When trying to develop charisma using humor, the main emphasis should be on the quality, not the quantity, of jokes. A person who tells jokes left and right can easily receive the title of buffoon. A short, witty saying sometimes produces a much greater effect than a series of drawn-out stories.
