What to do if you don't like your new job? Advice and recommendations from a psychologist

October 6, 2018
Psychology of communication
Ekaterina Gordeeva

I've wanted to change jobs for so long! We looked for suitable vacancies, sent our resumes, and went for interviews. It was necessary to find not just anything, but the job of your dreams.

She has been found. The first day of work is simply amazing. On the second, something is not quite right. On the third, you notice that your colleagues are not looking at you friendly at all. And a week later the realization comes: I don’t like the new job.

And what to do in this situation? Run away right away? Endure with your teeth clenched? Let's look at the current problem.

Finding out the reasons

Before making any decisions, let's carefully analyze why you don't like the job. The reasons may be as follows:

Not satisfied with job responsibilities.
The team is unsuccessful.
I don't like the manager's attitude.
The salary is different than promised.
Not at all what I would like to do.

Now let's look at each of them in detail.

Looking for the positives

Think about what is good and beneficial for you in your current job. Maybe the ability to take time off at any time, or a good salary, a nice team, or the availability of health insurance? Even one affirmative answer is already something, especially if you are not ready to change anything now. Look for your benefit even in the most unattractive circumstances at first glance.

Are you not very busy at work, but are you required to sit all the time? Don't be annoyed, but use your free time usefully: for example, improve your knowledge of computer programs.

Maintain friendly relations with colleagues. We spend so much time at work that we simply need to be able to chat with someone during the day, gossip, or just go out to lunch. We complained to each other over a cup of coffee and, lo and behold, our souls became lighter.

In general, there is no need to dwell on negative emotions. After all, work, especially unloved work, is not your whole life. Surely, you have something else: family, friends, hobbies. So think about it.

And treat work as something inevitable. In the end, it’s unlikely that everyone likes washing dishes either, but they do it because they can’t do otherwise.

Job responsibilities

Don't like the job? Was your new job not at all what you thought it would be? At the interview, the future manager colorfully described what wonderful responsibilities you would have. The reality turned out to be the complete opposite of his tales.

Did you apply for the position of PR manager, but at the workplace it turned out that you would have to become a “talking bird”? In other words, engage in telephone sales. And there is no smell of PR here.

What to do? Be sure to talk to your manager. Express to him your view of the situation, explain that this is not in your competence. If a person doesn’t want to meet you halfway, shrugs it off and says that you will learn or this is temporary, the choice is yours. But it is better to write a statement of your own free will. The leader begins to build communication with lies. Why do you need this? Who knows what such deceit on the part of the boss will lead to. He will also expose you to higher management in order to shield himself. You need to run away from such a person, the faster the better. You will find a job, especially if your previous place gave you good recommendations.

Go freelance or start your own business

Many workers, tired of the office routine, want to go to the other extreme and start working for themselves. Your line of work allows you to work outside the office or company. You should carefully analyze the freelance market before leaving your main job. The most correct decision would be to start freelancing or open your own business without leaving your old position. Based on the results, after some time, decide whether the new operating mode is suitable for you or not.

It's about the team

Don't like the team at your new job? Unfortunately, this is a fairly common occurrence. Especially in women's groups. Gossip, deceptions and other “joys” of joint work.

How to be in this case? Start by reducing communication to a minimum. Only for work. Do not drink tea together, do not start pleasant conversations. And if they persistently ask about personal things, then with a sweet smile make it clear that you are not going to air your dirty laundry in public.

It came to the point of being set up in front of the manager. What should a beginner do? Don’t hesitate, boldly defend your position. If necessary, demand that the surveillance cameras be raised. It's not your fault, you have nothing to fear.

Anna, 44 years old, accountant

I don't like my job, like most of the employees in our department. Agree, it is quite difficult to find a person whose calling is to enter primary documents into a computer and generate reports from them. There is no creativity in my work. There are also no opportunities to express oneself. I don’t even dream of a promotion - well, if I become not an ordinary one, but a chief accountant, this is an additional responsibility, even criminal! I don't need that! But, despite the fact that I don’t like my job, I’m not going to change it. They pay me normally, and for the most part my working hours are normal. Well, sometimes it happens that you have to stay late. But this happens no more often than once a quarter, and even then only if the report is difficult. But mostly I’m already sitting at home at seven o’clock in the evening and don’t have to worry about anything. For me personally, family is much more important than work, so what I do in the office is not that important to me. If only they paid normal money for it and I didn’t have to think about work after I got home. Perhaps you won’t make a career with this approach, but I don’t need that. My interest is home and family, and work is a necessary evil in life.

Manager's attitude

Don't like your new job because of your boss? At the interview he was just a sweetheart. But before the newcomer had time to really join the team, it all started. A quibble here and there. And all this is done so sarcastically.

What to do? Try to call the manager for a conversation. Ask him what he doesn't like about your job. And consult with him how this can be corrected, what result he would like to see.

An adequate boss will appreciate this. If you come across a careless leader who asserts himself at the expense of his subordinates, there is nothing you can do about it. You'll have to endure it or quit.

Why we don't like our work

As psychologists note, in most cases, people suffer from an unloved job and do not want to go to work for the following reasons:

poor working conditions;
boss is too strict;
hostility of colleagues;
conflict situations;
the need to get up early and go to bed late.

But you shouldn’t quit right away and look for a new job. You need to think everything over, consult with your loved ones and only then make a final decision. You can almost always find a way out of problematic situations, resolve conflicts, improve relationships in the team, and get your boss to improve working conditions. It is worth understanding that our work may not bring us pleasure for other reasons related to us personally.

Conflicts significantly reduce the attractiveness of work

Lack of understanding of your needs and desires

There are cases when a person is satisfied with his profession, working conditions and wages, but still does not receive moral and emotional satisfaction. Because of this, he is late for work, does not try, feels tired and empty, and after the end of the working day his mood immediately rises and strength appears. And then the question arises: is the person really satisfied with everything? Sometimes we ourselves do not realize what we need and what we want. It seems to us that quiet, calm, not hard, routine work is suitable for us, but for some reason it will not bring us pleasure. Maybe we need a more active, diverse and promising business that will charge us with energy, arouse our interest and desire to work. Until we try something new ourselves, we will not understand what we need.

Many people want to constantly receive the approval of others. And when someone says what kind of job they need, they listen to this opinion.

As a result, a lack of understanding of their own desires leads to the fact that, having received a new job, people hold on tightly to it. We should listen to our emotions, because if our work does not meet our needs, then a feeling of dissatisfaction is inevitable.

Young professionals often become dissatisfied with their workplace. This is due to the fact that they do not understand what they are interested in doing. This is because they have no experience. And interest appears when we do something that evokes positive emotions in us. The more knowledge and experience we gain, the more likely we are to understand our interests and find the right job.

Fundamental unwillingness to work

In some cases, a person does not like his work not because it is uninteresting or hard, but because he does not like and does not want to work at all. He considers this a punishment, and the mere thought of work duties causes him dissatisfaction and a feeling of protest. Such people are convinced that they do not need a job, and the need for it is an externally imposed stereotype. Therefore, they do not understand why they should give up their strength and work in vain for someone else.

To get out of this situation, a person needs to understand that by working, he can get money to support himself. But it is not necessary to work under someone else's leadership. You can do freelancing, start your own business, etc. When a person begins to make decisions on his own and does what he wants, then the feeling of protest and dissatisfaction will pass.

Salary is a great incentive to work

Diffidence

Very often people are not happy with what they do because they are bad at it or don’t do it at all. But over time, they adapt and gain the necessary skills, but the work still does not bring joy. In this case, the problem is lack of confidence in your abilities and capabilities. This can arise due to failures, loss of qualifications and skills, due to a long working break, or lack of experience.

Sometimes various circumstances prevent you from getting the job you dreamed of: lack of jobs, high competition, lack of experience, etc. Because of this, you feel helpless and find a job where you were accepted.

You agree without hesitation, believing that you will not receive a better offer. You work out of desperation, so you don't have fun.

But there is also a way out of this situation. You need to compare expectations with reality, understand what resources you have, what you know and can do, study the labor market, learn about offers, and find a vacancy that interests you. Don't think you can't do anything and don't be afraid to learn something new. Work on your self-esteem, if you set yourself up for a positive result, then you will succeed.

Difficult to make decisions

When your work responsibilities require you to make big decisions, it can be exhausting, make you nervous, worry about the outcome, and constantly worry about making a mistake. Because of this, you begin to associate work with something unpleasant, and just thinking about it makes you worry. And when you decide to quit, a new dilemma appears: can I find a new place, do I have a chance to outperform my competitors, do I have enough experience, etc.

The realization that fear of the future, uncertainty and inaction only slow you down and prevent you from developing will help you become more decisive. If you leave everything to chance, it won’t get better, the situation will only escalate and as a result you will hate your position. Think about alternative options and don't be afraid to take risks.

Life isn't always about avoiding risks.

Salary is different

Don't like the job? The new job should be enjoyable and satisfying in terms of money. And if the first part is in perfect order, then there is something wrong with the second... Did you receive your first salary and were unpleasantly surprised? Expectations were not met, the amount was lower than promised during the interview?

Go to the manager. Perhaps this is an accounting error. If there is no mistake, and the manager says that this is for the duration of the probationary period, raise the employment contract. Is there a clause in it that during the probationary period the salary is a certain amount? If not, then feel free to link to it.

The boss vows to pay the missing amount next month? Intimidate him by contacting the labor inspectorate. It does not work? Then write a statement to the prosecutor's office.

After this, you will most likely have to leave your job. But it is better to emerge victorious from the game than to humbly endure the infringement of your rights in the future. And this will happen again if the manager once allowed himself to cut wages without explaining the reasons.

Setting a goal

It has been proven that a person works much more effectively if he has a clear idea of the final result. Given this fact, there is another answer to the question of what to do if you don’t like your job. And it sounds like this: you need to set a goal!

What if we tried to work harder? Maybe you can get a promotion. And this is adding variety to work activity, and even an increase in salary. You can start saving for something nice. For a vacation near the sea, for example. The thought of azure water, palm trees and warm sun will additionally warm the soul and give strength.

This can turn work into a game, into a rewarding quest. Every day should be taken as a new level. Having passed it, you are one step closer to your goal. The beauty is that a person can shape the “content” of the levels himself. The most important thing in this matter is a creative approach and a dose of optimism.

The soul does not lie

Got a new job? Don't like it and are worried about it? Everything seems to be fine, but your soul doesn’t lie down? There are such situations. The employee shows up for an interview and everything goes well. The office is modern, the boss is adequate, and the colleagues are friendly. Great people have been selected. The salary is satisfactory.

And still something is not right. I don’t feel like going to the office, I don’t want to fulfill my duties. You feel that despite all the “goodies”, this is not your place. What should I do?

Remember that it takes three months to adapt. Work this time. If nothing changes, then leave.

Not life, but hard labor!

And yet, enduring a job you hate is harmful to your health: both physical and mental. Australian researchers from the National University (Canberra) have found that going to work under pressure is real stress, which leads to depression and nervous breakdowns, even more than what can be caused by lack of work. And constant psychological discomfort, irritability, dissatisfaction is a direct path to various diseases.

First of all, this weakens the immune system, and the person begins to get sick endlessly. Moreover, he has absolutely no incentive to get better, because sick leave is a legal opportunity not to go to the job he hates. All this happens on an unconscious level. It’s just that continuous stress undermines the defenses and literally sets the body up for illness.

If you are constantly nervous about work, you are almost guaranteed to worsen gastritis and other diseases of the gastrointestinal tract. The same Australian scientists have proven that chronic dissatisfaction with work leads to neurological problems, neuralgia, and back diseases. Cardiovascular diseases are also possible.

So you shouldn’t endure a job you don’t like. But, as you know, if you cannot change your circumstances, change your attitude towards them.

Psychologists' opinions

The man has already changed several jobs. He doesn't like it anywhere. So you don’t like yet another new job: should you endure it or leave it?

Psychologists believe that people tend to search for themselves. Work should bring, first of all, moral satisfaction. If this is not the case, no salary will be retained.

And then there are people who are called “flyers.” It is clear that the time when people worked at one factory for several decades has sunk into oblivion. But changing jobs every year does not do a person any credit.

If every time you become uninterested at work and you don’t stay at it for more than a year, be prepared for the fact that employers may treat you as a “flyer.” This type of people does not stay anywhere. As a rule, they do not like to work, and difficulties frighten them. Here he grabbed the top, there he ran over the top, without really delving into the work. As a result, it turns out that he did not become an intelligent specialist.

More variety!

Well, if it is not possible to change your place of employment, you will have to act in a different direction.

Does your job bring you no joy? This means that we need to find another source of it that will supply a person with such a sea of pleasure that the working day in an unloved place will begin to pass easier and faster. At least because he will be warmed by the anticipation of something good.

Having found a source of joy and inspiration, a person will feel a certain rainbow fullness. An outlet in the form of a hobby will not only diversify life, but also give strength, energy, and confidence. In addition, a hobby can give a person a new goal with which he will be “on fire.” He will have something for which it will be interesting to live. Anger will disappear, as well as aggression and resentment towards one’s fate, because all this appears due to monotony and boredom. Work will no longer come to the fore. It will simply begin to be perceived by a person as a source of income.

Need forced

Don't like the job? A new job was found “on the run.” It happens? It happens quite often. For example, we had a fight at a previous job and quit under the influence of emotions. There are no savings, but we need something for something. Here you don’t have much choice, we go to the first place we come across.

It would seem a completely absurd situation. However, it usually occurs among young professionals. I don’t want to make concessions; it seems that all roads lie at my feet. Wherever I want, I’ll go and work there. You have a diploma in your pocket; with a higher education they will take you anywhere.

Alas, the reality turns out to be different. Parents drive them to work, and an employee with minimal experience is not particularly needed. We take what they give.

Or they laid off workers from the company. They paid the necessary sums of money, double the salaries. And the person is the only breadwinner in the family. And the sums, which seemed large, began to melt before our eyes. He tries to find a job in his specialty, but nothing comes of it. Something more or less suitable turned up, so I went there.

In this case, it is natural that you do not like the new job. What to do? If you practically never had to change your job, then you can take a risk. Start searching for what you like. But don't leave this job until you find something you like. It won't be easy. Sometimes the search takes six months or more. Don't give up, keep searching.

Have you found a suitable option, passed the interview and realized that it’s not for you? Write a statement of your own free will.

A useful burst of energy

What to do if you no longer like your job, and everything connected with it causes only hostility? You need to find a way to throw out your negative energy. This is really important because this situation can lead to a state of chronic high tension. It is accompanied by disruption of the functioning of the body, the functioning of the autonomic nervous system, muscle pain, insomnia, etc.

Psychologists recommend going in for sports or some other active activity. Many people neglect this advice, citing fatigue. From morning to evening at a job you don’t like, and then go to the gym after that? Exactly. Unloved work causes stress, which is considered a physiological reaction involving the release of adrenaline into the blood in small but regular doses. In modern conditions, the body has nothing to spend the energy it receives on. It accumulates, as a result of which a person quickly gets tired and “wears out”, hence eternal fatigue. Playing sports can help you use this energy purposefully and constructively.

Plus, glucose levels are regulated, endorphins are produced, tissues and organs are saturated with oxygen, and moderate exercise helps to warm up and feel more energetic. Therefore, when you no longer like your job, what you need to do is go to the gym.

Tricks of life

Don't like the job? Are you already tired of your new job? How long have you been on vacation? Or, after working for a couple of years without him, did you move on to a new job? The body is simply tired and signals that it needs rest.

What to do in this case? After all, they just arrived at a new place. Hold out by hook or by crook for three months. And then go on sick leave. Just not for two or three weeks. For a few days. On Friday morning they “fell ill” and were discharged on Monday.

Cheating, of course, is not good. But it’s worth using this method when you no longer have the strength. It’s better to lie on the couch at home, tormented by remorse, than to have a nervous breakdown. And in the end, angry because of nonsense, follow the lead of emotions, writing a letter of resignation.

If the boss is adequate, you can do without sick leave. Call him on Friday morning and ask for time off, citing illness or family circumstances.

Nine out of ten managers would agree without a problem. Moreover, if the employee has proven himself well during his time working in this place. Why not make a concession to him, since the person is sick.

What if he tells you to take sick leave? Whereas? You can remember your chronic diseases, or refer to a headache, an acute respiratory infection, and so on. Doctors are people too, they will understand that you need to rest, especially if you thank them for it.

Ekaterina, 20 years old, salesperson

I study at the institute, live in a dormitory, my parents are in another city. How can I survive in Moscow if I don’t work? I still can’t find a job in my specialty. I'm only in my second year, I don't have any skills yet. So I work wherever I have to. I just hate my job! I work in a small store that sells 24 hours a day. Often you have to stay at night in order to have time to go to college during the day. Do you think a late night stall is a good place for a young girl? No matter how drunk they get, they call me what words they call me! It’s very unpleasant, and sometimes downright scary! The owner is also not a gift to us. For the slightest offense he is fined. But what can you do? Where will I go if I quit? I don’t see the point in getting a job at the same stall. This one is at least not far from the hostel. But I can’t get another job - no one will take me.

Good layout

It's good if you plan your schedule for each week, but if you're too overwhelmed with responsibilities, it's not good. What kind of job should you look for? When searching for the desired job, you should not believe myths in pursuit of specific activities in a specific organization. Pay attention to other criteria: moderate workload, friendly atmosphere and an adequate team (and boss too).

The things that motivate people to choose their dream job, such as the type of work they do or the prestige of the company, can quickly be offset by terrible bosses, a toxic environment, or excessive workload. How important is it? Even if you work in the company of your dreams, due to the above factors, you will not experience the desired delight.

Important detail

In short, in such a situation should you quit immediately or wait a while with your decision? There is no one size fits all answer. Much depends on work circumstances and the current situation. Why do you need to weigh everything carefully?

Some workplaces are so toxic that leaving quickly would indeed be a wise move. However, if you need money and don’t want to run “ahead of the locomotive,” you should take this situation more seriously. At least, it’s worth holding off on leaving for a while to look for a better job option.

Preferential deposits and more: low-income citizens will be offered a new type of deposits

Oranges and more: what else to add to your home to attract wealth

Pragmatist and other types of buyers: tips on how to spend money wisely

If you don't want to work at all

No one forces you to get a job against your own will. Nowadays, many women and even men, regardless of stereotypes, live supported by their other halves. You can often find a family in which the woman takes on the role of financial support, and the man takes care of household duties and raises children.

If this option is rejected, it is worth thinking about sources of passive income. For example, you can open a business, rent out an apartment, buy shares in a company.