What to do if a boss finds fault with an employee for any reason


Unfortunately, the reality turns out to be not as rosy as in dreams: many specialists, especially young and inexperienced ones, are faced with outright rudeness from the boss in the very first days of their work. Most often, strictness and exactingness turn into unreasonable nagging and quarrels.

Reasoned criticism is good, it helps you develop and work on mistakes. But what if the boss constantly finds fault for no reason? Let's look at the problem in more detail.

What's your boss like?

When analyzing the question “why does the boss find fault with me?”, it is better to start with an analysis of his character. This can come up with the right strategy.

  • Hysterical. Frequent outbursts of anger, dissatisfaction with subordinates. He is not endowed with high intelligence. I am ready to accuse anyone without admitting my guilt. He often appropriates the fruits of someone else's work and does not consider this shameful. It is difficult to establish a constructive dialogue with him, and his arguments and accusations are unjustified and not supported by facts.
  • Perfectionist. Management's desire to organize work at a high level deserves praise and approval. But sometimes it becomes extreme. Everyone makes mistakes. But not for the perfectionist. We are not talking about any kind of democracy. He keeps everything under control and scolds his subordinates for minor mistakes in their work. "Best the enemy of the good". Such a boss is used to keeping everything under control and refuses to delegate, even when necessary. Does not allow managers under his command to make independent decisions.
  • Petty tyrant. Inappropriate behavior is a consequence of more serious personal problems. Lack of self-confidence, the desire to prove importance and significance by belittling others, excessive confidence and selfishness. He finds fault with every reason, belittles his subordinates, is dissatisfied with the work performed, and does not miss the opportunity to extol himself. If the boss is a tyrant, it is absolutely not clear how to behave. You don't want to lose your job, but you can't stand it. You should not allow your dignity and honor to be humiliated. If the situation has gone too far, do not be afraid to contact the labor inspectorate or court.
  • Schemer. Dangerous and insidious guy. You can expect any trick from him. He craves power. All methods are good for him in achieving his goal. If he is guilty or has made a mistake, he will try by all means to “throw off” this unpleasant burden.

Strategies for resolving conflict between employees

Strategy is the line of behavior chosen by the parties to the conflict. It has a decisive influence on the outcome of the dispute. The manager, working with a conflict situation, must guide his subordinates to choose the most productive strategy. Some of them do not involve open confrontation, but avoidance of solving the problem. These sources of tension can subsequently lead to a crisis, so it is also important to pay attention to such “hidden” conflicts. Five basic strategies for dealing with conflict situations:

1. Competition - opponents are focused only on their own goals, ready for open struggle, imposing their point of view on the other side. A concession in a conflict is perceived as a loss. When is such a position justified? In cases where the situation is dangerous and there is no time for negotiations. The chosen solution must be constructive and beneficial for the entire organization, and not for a specific person. In other cases, this strategy is destructive and leads to a deterioration in relations.

2. Concession – refusal to fight, voluntary or under the influence of circumstances. By choosing this strategy, the conflict participant seeks to maintain good relations, avoiding open confrontation. Avoiding a conflict is necessary in cases where one realizes that one’s position is incorrect, one is dependent on one’s opponent, and when the damage received during the confrontation is greater than the possible benefit. In this strategy, the conflict between employees is obvious, but one of the parties deliberately avoids it.

3. Compromise - each opponent concedes something in order to come to a common decision. It is used when there are equal opportunities, but mutually exclusive interests of the parties to the conflict. To choose this strategy, you need a desire to meet each other halfway. Although this is not a constructive approach, employees may be satisfied with the decision because they are forced to give up something.

4. Avoidance of conflict - denial, the desire to turn a blind eye to the tension that arises. This strategy is used to gain time to decide on a line of behavior before the conflict moves into the open phase. Conflict is also avoided if its subject is not important for the employee; he hopes that the situation will resolve itself.

5. Cooperation – finding a solution that will suit everyone. Finding a solution requires a complete and open analysis, discussion of disagreements, and a desire to resolve the conflict to the benefit of all colleagues. This is the most effective behavior, but also the most difficult.

Let's look at these strategies using an example:

The manager promised the client that the website design would be ready in a week. The designer can manage to complete this work if he refuses other projects, but will let other customers down. The manager insists - the client is large, long-term cooperation is possible, we can “move” the others in line. A conflict arises.

If a competitive strategy is chosen in this situation, the manager and designer can spend a lot of time figuring out whose position is correct, involving colleagues, and discussing the situation with the manager. Time will be lost, relationships will be ruined.

The designer can work on weekends or stay longer so as not to aggravate the situation. In the end, why spoil the relationship with the manager, you can give in by sacrificing your free time. This method of resolving a conflict between employees cannot be considered winning, since the designer is forced to rework it due to someone else’s mistake.

The manager can ignore the designer’s words and hope that everything will somehow be resolved on its own—the client will forget about the deadline or the work will take less time. He will avoid conflict, but the consequence may be the loss of the customer.

If a compromise solution is chosen, the parties make mutual concessions: the manager asks the customer to wait a little, and the designer is late at work a couple of times or moves non-critical tasks in favor of the required project. As a result, all agreements have been fulfilled, but some tension remains.

When choosing a cooperation strategy, the manager and designer can analyze the designer’s workload, the possibility of moving some orders or delegating them to other performers, and also consider increasing the lead time for a large order. This analysis will allow you to choose the optimal solution that suits all parties. To prevent employee conflict in the future, the manager can optimize the work process, for example, oblige the manager to clarify the deadlines for completing the order with the designer before announcing them to the customer.

Alexander Alariysky , founder of toxoff.net:

“The task of a manager is to identify and stop conflicts in the organization. Carry out a fair policy and do not violate the rules of law and morality yourself. It is important for a leader to reconcile the parties to the conflict, find out the reason, analyze the explanations, determine the real reason and eliminate the source of conflicts. The cause of collisions is often hidden from the observer. In my practice, the organizer of the confrontation often hides behind the conflicting people. Especially if the dispute is accompanied by negative emotions: anger, hatred, resentment. First of all, you need to find someone who benefits from it. There is a benefit from conflict, but it depends on the actions of the leader: the boundaries of behavior are outlined and labor discipline increases. As a result, work is getting better. Fair punishment for pests calms and motivates the work team.”

The real reason for the dissatisfaction

The average employee prefers not to enter into open conflict. This is what nagging bosses take advantage of. Many people quit without ever trying to correct the situation.

It is important

Assess the conflict from the outside. If there are unfounded accusations, open anger and other “delights” of unprofessional labor relations, it’s time to act.

Ask your boss for a confidential conversation. Finding out the reasons in a calm environment can solve a problematic situation.

You will need to prepare for this meeting. Make a rough plan for the conversation. Think about what your boss might ask or answer. Go into the conversation in a calm frame of mind. You should not have the goal of pointing out to the manager his incompetence or accusing him of personal vices. Find out the real reason for the dissatisfaction.

Start by describing the situation. There is no need for long, plaintive stories about difficult working days. A few striking facts or situations (that took place) will say much more. Here is an example of such a conversation.

- Good afternoon. I want to talk about the current situation. I have been working at company N for several years now. I see prospects for my own growth, and I really like working in a team where there is mutual help and understanding. But a certain misunderstanding has arisen in our working relationship. (List several facts that most clearly demonstrate this).

– What kind of misunderstanding are you talking about? You are disgusting at your work responsibilities...

Here it is necessary to interrupt and ask to explain what the boss means. Remember to remain calm and respectful. If you were wrong, don't be afraid to admit it. Shifting the blame to others and being in complete denial will only anger your boss even more.

As a result of the conversation, you should find out the reasons that prevent you from “living together” and propose solutions. This conversation is not easy, but it is necessary to have it.

If a compromise is not found, then you should seriously think about changing jobs. There is another option - contact higher management or special authorities. But this is unlikely to bring the long-awaited calm and relief of tension.

In other cases, the boss will seriously think about the following points:

  • you are not a helpless and cowardly employee, but a person capable of defending your interests;
  • he may lose a valuable employee due to the fact that he clearly “goes too far”;
  • his accusations were unfounded for a number of reasons that he did not know before (the information was presented incorrectly or did not exist at all).

Conspiracy against the victim

Alla knows firsthand what it’s like when a team rejects you and doesn’t let you into their friendly ranks. She once worked in a company where the main contingent of workers were ladies much older than her. But instead of maternal care, the girl was faced with ignorance and open hostility from her colleagues. And although she liked the work and her bosses had no complaints against her, Alla had to quit a few months after the conspiracy against her began.

This is a typical example of mobbing (mob - crowd), or persecution of one person by a group of people. As a rule, the goal of mobbing and other types of psychological pressure is to make the victim lose his nerve and shamefully flee from the “battlefield.”

The main difference between targeted bullying and ordinary conflicts and strained relationships with someone is its consistency and duration, from several weeks to several years. There are other signs that suggest that a war has been launched against you. For example, regular criticism, often too petty or lacking any specifics; ridicule and insults; threats and outright slander. They hide important information from you or do not provide it on time; are loaded with tasks that are not particularly relevant to your competence; they are not invited to joint team events... But if you are presented with justified complaints about the truly poor quality of your work, you cannot attribute them to bullying.

A person who has been subjected to psychological terror may also develop health problems: sleep disorders, physical exhaustion, constant migraines, depression and various diseases. Self-esteem falls, self-doubt appears. When dealing with health problems, pursuers will also not fail to play another trump card: “Why keep an employee who is always on sick leave?”

Personal enmity - what is the reason?

What to do if your boss bullies and humiliates your honor and dignity? It doesn't matter what the reason for this behavior is. This is unacceptable. But do not go into open conflict, do everything delicately, observing the limits of decency.

Advice

If you start insulting, getting personal and blaming your boss, what will you say better than him?

The main reasons (and more often reasons) for nagging in the presence of personal hostility from superiors are the following situations.

  1. Failure to comply with the dress code. The attention of the authorities is focused on you, do not be surprised by this situation. The boss's claims are often unfounded (unless you suddenly decide to surprise everyone with a chic neckline). Do not give a reason to reproach you for inconsistency. You can publicly measure the length of your skirt or read out the dress code rules. If this is an isolated incident, turn it into a joke and say that this will not happen again.
  2. Lack of subordination. Learn to restrain yourself even in the most unpleasant situations. The boss deliberately challenges you to conflict. You must respond with dignity to all attacks directed at you. If you were reproached for insubordination, but this was not the case, reasoned and calmly explain the necessity and correctness of your chosen tactics.
  3. Frequently arriving late and leaving early. Remember the clauses of the employment contract. You get paid for the hours you work. Don't allow yourself to be treated this way. Here the boss has every right to apply penalties or reprimand.
  4. Scandalous gossip. They can come from anyone, but the bosses will sincerely believe in them. The boss has neither the time nor the desire to figure out their veracity on his own. So find a convenient time and explain that this is a lie. There are no guarantees that they will believe you, but you should definitely try. You shouldn’t wait for your boss to call you to such a conversation; work proactively.
  5. Reluctance to help the organization. Quite an abstract accusation. Don't be afraid to get specific and find out what you're doing wrong. Remind them to perform their job duties responsibly. Often such claims come from perfectionists, therefore, adequacy tends to zero.

Regulatory acts regulating liability for a crime

Art. 130, which provides for criminal punishment for insult, was decriminalized in 2013. Its functions are intended to be fulfilled by Art. 5.61, introduced into the Administrative Code. However, qualified compositions are retained in Art. 148, 297, 319, 336 of the Criminal Code. Their objects are persons serving in military units or judicial bodies, and the subjective side is expressed by the official duties of the victim.

Sexism in the workplace

How to behave if your boss finds fault with you and humiliates you just because you are a woman and he is a man? This phenomenon has a clear definition - sexism.

He may manifest himself in inappropriate jokes and remarks on the part of a male boss or a reluctance to promote you in your career and “bestow” you with well-deserved bonuses and privileges. It is possible to fight the phenomenon.

It is enough to collect facts and evidence (record it on a tape recorder) and write a report to higher management if it was not possible to reach an agreement at the local level.

In case of refusal of a well-deserved promotion, provide a comparative analysis of your merits and those who already occupy similar positions.

Another manifestation of sexism is overt sexual advances. It is necessary to stop them. State in a calm, laconic manner that you do not want such a relationship. That's not what you're here for. Remember your rights and don't let yourself be intimidated. If you cannot resolve the conflict peacefully, collect evidence and go to court with accusations of sexual harassment.

Evidence material

Any accusation requires objective confirmation, which may include:

  1. Eyewitness testimony.
  2. Data from CCTV cameras.
  3. Recording from a voice recorder turned on during the incident. Depending on the sound quality, you may be able to attach a transcript.

The investigation period should not exceed 1 month. 2 months are allotted for the consideration of the case. The court decision can be appealed within 10 days after the decision is issued.

Any questions you may have can be asked in the comments to the article.

How to stop insults

Often bosses go too far, allowing themselves to shout, humiliate and insult subordinates. This cannot be tolerated. Many people make the mistake of responding in the same tone and getting personal.

When you hear an insult addressed to you, calmly and calmly ask your boss what caused the negativity. Remind him of the administrative responsibility for humiliation and rudeness. No one is allowed to break the law, no matter what the reasons behind it.

The position of a superior gives him the right to assign responsibilities and demand their fulfillment. But he is not a slave owner who is allowed to do whatever he wants.

You should not forgive even a single humiliation. This can become a habit and will be repeated with enviable regularity.

What threatens the accused under Art. 5.61 Code of Administrative Offenses

Art. 5.61 of the Code of Administrative Offenses contains three points.

Paragraph 1

An illegal act is punishable by a fine in the amount of:

  • 1000–3000 rub. for individuals;
  • 10,000–30,000 rub. for officials;
  • 50,000–100,000 rub. for organizations.

Point 2

For defamatory statements posted in the media and other publicly accessible sources, a fine is imposed in the amount of:

  • 3000–5000 rub. for FL;
  • 30,000–50,000 rub. for persons holding administrative positions;
  • 100,000–500,000 rub. for YUL.

Point 3

Those guilty of connivance leading to the release of offensive expressions into public domain are punishable by a fine of:

  • 10,000–30,000 rub. for officials;
  • 30,000–50,000 rub. for legal entities.

Read more about the concept of insult to personality under the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation, the Civil Code of the Russian Federation and the Code of Administrative Offenses of the Russian Federation - read on our website https://lexconsult.online/5863-chto-takoe-oskorblenie-po-koap-rf-administrativnoe-ugolovnoe-nakazanie-za-nego

Conversation in a raised voice

What to do if your boss bullies you at work, constantly raises your tone and doesn’t let you say a word? There is only one answer - do not ignore it. The position of a “humble lamb” will be very convenient for leadership. And the incidents will continue.

When trying to tame your boss, do not forget about self-control. Don't allow yourself to shout or raise your tone in response. Your speech should be calm, convincing and clear. No belittling, doubts or attempts at flirting in the voice. Explain that you will continue the dialogue only in a calm tone. The following methods will help reduce the heat:

  • looking eye to eye;
  • drinking a glass of water;
  • an offer to sit down and discuss everything calmly.

The boss continues to shout, don’t humiliate yourself either, trying to calm him down. This is not your responsibility. Say that you do not intend to continue the conversation, but are happy to resume it in a businesslike manner. After that, you can safely turn around and leave.

Indirect methods of influencing a boss or supervisor

A person receives about 80% of information non-verbally! If you build a behavior model correctly, the information will be firmly entrenched in your boss on a subconscious level.

  • Forget about smiling. Don't try to smooth things over by smiling at your boss during an awkward moment.

Be serious. Women, when communicating with men on a subconscious level, use a smile to achieve sympathy. In business relationships, this technique may not work.

By smiling awkwardly, you show softness and provoke an attack, especially from a sadist, dictator and actor. An emotionless facial expression cools the boss's ardor.

  • Follow your gaze. Look your boss in the eye. If you find it difficult to maintain eye contact, keep your gaze at nose level. When you lower your eyes, you recognize the strength of the other person. On a subconscious level, he feels that you have given up and goes on an active offensive.
  • Control your gestures. Lowering your head, constantly nodding, nervous gestures, defensive postures and movements show your uncertainty and weakness. Watch your behavior:
  • Don't backtrack when communicating with your boss;
  • Do not look for additional support in the form of a table or chair when standing in front of your boss;
  • Do not fence yourself off from him with crossed arms and legs;
  • Stop blowing away non-existent specks of dust and removing imaginary specks from your clothes;
  • Remove your hands from your face and raise your eyes;
  • Express agreement with a discreet single nod;
  • Formulate phrases accurately and answer questions.

  • Don't hesitate trying to avoid answering . By hiding behind vague phrases, you are admitting insecurity and weakness.
  • Work on your clothes. Business style in clothing is a symbol of distance. A formal dress code sets subconscious boundaries of communication in the boss’s head. It is not for nothing that in large companies employees are required to comply with mandatory appearance requirements, the main one of which is business attire.
  • Don't pay attention to jokes and provocations. Failure to respond as expected will disrupt your boss’s plans. Move on to discuss work issues without noticing sarcasm and inappropriate jokes. This technique does not work with tyrant leaders. Silence for them is a sign of weakness and fear, which affects sadists like a red rag on a bull.

Coping with habitual nonverbal reactions is difficult, but necessary if you want to show your boss his place.

When choosing a method of response, be guided by your own strengths and the character of your boss. The more individual factors you take into account, the more effective your behavior will be.

Intimidation by dismissal

If the boss says: “If you don’t like it, quit,” then this is a direct manifestation of psychological pressure.

It is important

That is, either you agree to the terms or look for a new job. Don't fall for this blackmail. Such actions are illegal.

The reasons why you may be fired are clearly stated in the labor code. And no one is allowed to exceed their authority. In this case, the management has no legal grounds for dismissal. Defending your rights is the task of every self-respecting employee. There are not many ways to counter it. You can contact the trade union or write a complaint to the labor inspectorate. Another option would be to draw up an additional agreement with a clearly stated amount of payment for the duties introduced.

The situation is more complicated in private organizations where labor relations are not properly formalized. But it’s worth trying to defend your rights in this case too.

The boss is nagging about something that is irrelevant

Conflicts between employees and their immediate supervisor inevitably arise during busy work days. The reason for this is stress, workload, problems in interaction with government agencies, pressure on the boss from senior management.

A bad employee reaction is to cry and endure it. The motive is certainly noble, but it leads labor relations to a dead end. The employee needs to maintain self-esteem and mental health.

The first thing to do is check the content of the employer’s speeches and texts. The second is to identify discrimination on any grounds against an employee and the deterioration of working conditions for him.

Discrimination on racial, gender, national and other grounds is unacceptable and grossly violates the norms of the Constitution and the Labor Code of the Russian Federation.

Last resort

If all attempts to stop the unreasonable nagging of management have not brought results, then the question of dismissal arises. This is an extreme measure, and it is worth taking it thoughtfully and carefully. As they say, don’t cut from the shoulder. If you decide to leave your job, first look for a new one.

Send your resume to the vacancies that interest you, call (or better yet, visit) the HR departments of other companies. Don't be afraid to undergo multi-level testing and don't be intimidated by high requirements.

During the interview you will be asked the reason for your dismissal. Do not rush to tell the whole truth that your boss is a tyrant and you constantly argued with him. This will not work to your advantage, even if it is true. The new employer does not know you, and will be inclined to think that you are a conflicted person who tends to blame everyone but himself. This will be followed by a refusal. It’s better to talk with reason about the impossibility of career growth or lack of prospects.

Being nagged by your boss at work is an unpleasant, but quite common, phenomenon. Everyone has encountered it to one degree or another. You should not tolerate and take on the role of a victim. Save your nerves and do not forget about your self-esteem.

What can you do before contacting government agencies?

If an employee does not seek to leave his job, abuse by the employer is possible.

Nevertheless, most large organizations provide mechanisms for resolving conflict situations between employees and management:

  • trade unions of workers. This body considers requests from employees and makes a binding decision regarding the employer;
  • trade unions of industry workers. Formed in the regions, they also consider requests from representatives of the profession;
  • if the organization has a labor dispute commission, the employee has the right to file a complaint about a violation of rights.

Important! The employer pays wages to union members and has direct influence on their decisions. So, to resolve serious issues, you should contact government agencies.

How to understand that you are being bullied and what it can lead to

Of course, workplace bullying is different from school bullying. No one will write “Vasya is a fool” on the board and steal your homework notebook or sports uniform. No one will be pinned down in the toilet or locker room, beaten or outright humiliated. At least the chances of this happening are quite low.

But this does not mean that bullying at work is harmless. The aggressors just use different techniques.

They may make caustic remarks or offensive jokes at you, pointedly ignore you, misinform you so that you fail at a task and present yourself in an unfavorable light to your boss, criticize harshly, dump additional work on you, spread gossip, leave anonymous complaints, even steal or damage your things and documents.

The reason for bullying 6 Reasons Why People Are Bullied at Work / Very Well Mind can be anything: appearance that is far from beauty standards, kindness and gentleness, impressive career successes and the favor of superiors. If you have become a victim of bullying, do not look to yourself for the reasons. The aggressor is always to blame. Yes, he is often pushed into bullying by personal problems. Why Do People Bully? The Scientific Reasons / Ditch the Label: stress and psychological trauma, self-doubt, past violence. But this does not relieve him of responsibility.

If you feel bad at work, and the prospect of interacting with colleagues causes fear, then you should under no circumstances turn a blind eye to it.

Those who are bullied for a long time are not only less productive. They also risk their health: bullying is cited by B. Verkuil, S. Atasayi, ML Molendijk. Workplace Bullying and Mental Health: A Meta-Analysis on Cross-Sectional and Longitudinal Data / PLoS ONE to Depression, Anxiety Disorder, and Panic Attacks. Bullying also increases T. Xu, L.L. Magnusson et al. Workplace Bullying and Workplace Violence as Risk Factors for Cardiovascular Disease: A Multi-Cohort Study / European Heart Journal risk of developing cardiovascular diseases and even diabetes T. Xu, LL Magnusson Hanson et al. Workplace Bullying and Violence as Risk Factors for Type 2 Diabetes: A Multi-Cohort Study and Meta-analysis / Type 2 Diabetologia.

Clings to a girl

A more advanced case is when a male leader finds fault with a woman. Let's look at it separately:

  • Despite the fact that the feminist movement has existed for a long time, in Russia high positions are most often occupied by men. Sometimes nitpicking can be caused precisely by this point. The main reason why an employer may find fault with a lady is a feeling of weakness of the enemy.
  • A boss may feel sympathy for his subordinate. Naturally, not every person can reciprocate: unrequited “love” is a common occurrence. But the insecure boss will get angry and begin to use his position to humiliate the lady and make her stay at work uncomfortable.
  • If you are a real expert in your field, then it may well be that the boss feels like a prof. inferiority in your background. It's sad, but that's life: even small success can cause envy. But there is a reason to smile - you have really achieved something in your life!

Girls tend to remain silent and may not talk about conflicts: they are not always ready to fight if they see that their opponent is higher in terms of position. The reason is the inability to value oneself and problems in childhood.

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