Cyberbullying – is there any salvation? What should victims of cyberbullying do?

The Internet, originally invented as a resource for communication and exchange of information between scientists from different parts of the planet, is actively developing. At the moment, almost 60% of people from all over the world can go online, and most of them have accounts on social networks, where various topics are actively discussed and heated debates are held on any topic. And since the online world is populated by the same people as offline, conflicts are inevitable. Increasingly, “bullies” are beginning to appear online, taking pleasure in humiliating other participants in the conversation. This phenomenon is called cyberbullying.

How to avoid bullying, how to protect yourself from offenders, is it possible to punish them? How to protect your children? Today we will try to understand these and other questions.

What is cyberbullying?

The term “cyberbullying” was coined by psychologists in the mid-1990s, when the Internet came to the masses, to describe bullying in the online environment. Cyberbullying can take different forms: insults, stalking, blackmail, harassment, slander, dissemination of personal data. All this causes psychological trauma to the victim.

Cyberbullying can be:

1. Public: in the presence of viewers, for example, in discussions under a post.
2. Personal: insults come through private messages.

Unlike regular bullying - bullying in the real world - cyberbullying occurs in the Internet environment, and often does not go offline. However, if we are talking about bullying within a team (for example, in a classroom), then the types of bullying successfully complement each other, aggravating the situation of the victim. But if in reality everyone sees and knows the bully, then online the process becomes anonymous.

It is important to note that cyberbullying is a long-term, systematic process. A single unflattering comment or angry response does not constitute bullying.

Who becomes the aggressor and the victim? As a rule, middle and high school students are more likely to experience cyberbullying , since it is during adolescence that children try different forms of dominance in a group. Teenagers do not yet know how to adequately express their feelings and emotions and release aggression in a socially acceptable way. However, this does not mean that any other network user cannot be subject to bullying.

Participants in cyberbullying

There are always multiple parties involved in the bullying process (both online and offline). Let's take a closer look at their portraits.

Aggressor

The person who attacks the victim, as a rule, is not confident in himself and is afraid that this will become noticeable. He wants to be superior to others, but not due to his own characteristics, but due to the devaluation of the victim. And if earlier physically more developed guys became bullies, then with the development of technology anyone can assert themselves at the expense of others.

Thanks to the capabilities of the network, the aggressor can hide under different accounts and also create accomplices, which increases the amount of harm caused to the victim. Anonymity on the Internet disinhibits attackers and allows them to do more than they could do in real life.

Victim

Anyone can become a victim of a cyber attack. Many people have encountered this phenomenon online in one way or another. According to statistics in Russia, almost 60% of children have already encountered this type of online bullying.

Media personalities are also familiar with cyberbullying firsthand. For example, the actively developing “cancel culture” (boycott of a certain person by the public) in Western countries is increasingly turning into real persecution for people, from which it is impossible to hide. And no apologies or justifications can save you from the wrath of the crowd.

As a rule, the victims are anxious, tense, and fearful teenagers. They have few acquaintances and friends who could come to the rescue and intercede. Low self-esteem only supports their belief that everything said by the aggressor is true, and there is simply no way to fight back. And high anxiety does not allow you to actively work on yourself. Thus, the aggressor quickly calculates the victim’s “pain points” and begins to systematically destroy his life.

Witnesses

It is important to mention another party involved in the conflict – witnesses. Even without being an aggressor or a victim, you can often see cyberbullying on the Internet. For a fragile child's psyche, this can become a serious test. Witnesses can take one side, becoming an “assistant to the aggressor” or a “defender,” or they can stand aside:

• “Helpers of the aggressor” are very conformist (agree with the majority opinion), are ready to carry out the instructions of the aggressor and are afraid of being in the place of the victim;
• “Defenders” are participants in cyberbullying, trying with all their might to stop the bullying and find words of reconciliation. They are non-conflict and want a comfortable existence within the team. These are people with normal self-esteem who are not looking for trouble.

There are various studies that conflict on whether boys or girls are more likely to be victims or bullies, so it is likely that gender is not a fundamental factor in cyberbullying.

What it is

Victims of cyberbullying are usually more vulnerable than those who are directly attacked. This is explained by the very characteristics of bullying in the Internet space, which occurs constantly. There is no protection in the form of termination of the school day - personal life can be interfered with constantly, at any time of the day and from all kinds of sources. Of course, on the one hand, the aggressor can be blocked or added to the blacklist, but this does not guarantee that the person will not use another account or another communication network. Hiding at home will not work, just like asking for protection from elders or managers - the rules of online communication do not imply the intervention of other people.

Another feature that makes cyberbullying a more powerful weapon than real-life attacks is the speed at which information spreads. On the Internet, information spreads in seconds, and a compromising video can be viewed by all mutual acquaintances and hundreds of strangers within ten minutes after filming. In addition, the width of the involved audience when using non-personal messages reaches colossal proportions. All files are stored online and can be brought up again even after the first wave has subsided.

It is almost impossible to completely remove information that has entered the network and requires a lot of time and effort. In addition to this difficulty, the possibility of anonymity hinders the ability to resist cyber attacks. In most cases, artificial pages and addresses are created for cyberbullying, the person does not reveal his identity and continues to irritate the victim without revealing his identity. Victims of cyberbullying may become paranoid due to not knowing the identity of the bully.

Those who are victims in real life are subject to such attacks. It is impossible for a person to never be bullied at school but suffer from attacks on the Internet. The risk category is teenagers, for whom the assessment of others and their own external presentation in the world are extremely important. This increases sensitivity to any statements, ranging from characteristics of personality and intelligence to comments from an avatar.

Social isolation is also possible on the Internet, which is one of the variants of bullying, but it manifests itself in exclusion from gaming and professional communities or in restricting access and rights in them. But in addition to passive forms in the form of ignoring, there are also active cruel options that can drive a person to a mental breakdown - direct threats of physical violence, beating or death threats. They can extend not only to the victim herself, but also to her loved ones.

Cyberbullying on social networks is not noticeable to adults, and children themselves are in no hurry to admit it and ask for help. You can understand what is happening by indirect signs, such as closedness, a person’s retreat into the world of fantasy or computer games. In the process of constantly acting stress factors, sleep is disturbed, mood decreases, various pains may appear, and general health deteriorates. Since cyberbullying is often carried out by classmates at school age, this can affect school attendance and academic performance, and personal belongings may go missing. In addition, online bullying can be combined with direct bullying, which can lead to abrasions and bruises from beatings.

The consequences of Internet terrorism can cause both protest in attending school and severe personal changes. In especially severe forms, when attacks are carried out regularly and extremely cruel methods are used, cases of clinical depression, neurological disorders and suicide attempts are possible.

It is also difficult to identify the offender, because he may not have the physical strength or authority among other peers to ruin someone’s life, especially if the actions are performed anonymously.

Types of Internet bullying

Cyberbullying online comes in various forms and names. Let's try to understand each of them.

Trolling

Not really bullying. This is a kind of tough challenge to a competition of humorous skills. As a rule, it doesn’t matter to a troll who to picket with or for how long. If the response comes with a more witty remark or the comment is completely ignored, then the “comedian” will go looking for another platform for his performance.

Flaming

It's not bullying either. A single outburst of anger towards a person, expressed through an offensive comment or harsh criticism. As a rule, the authors of such rude messages do not need a response. They poured out their reaction to your product (post, article, video, photo, etc.) and moved on, forgetting about your existence after 2 minutes.

Heating

Derived from the English word “hate,” it is full-blown bullying against a person that unfolds online. The victim is literally bombarded with offensive messages and comments through all possible sources - social networks, instant messengers, video hosting sites, etc.

Harassment (harassment)

Harassment with obvious sexual overtones. The person begins to receive messages with photographs and videos of a sexual nature, corresponding calls and confessions. The downside can be a form of revenge in which a once close person begins to threaten to post or posts intimate photographs and video files of the victim for public viewing.

Dissing (slander)

Spreading false information and rumors about the victim in order to cause maximum reputational damage. For these purposes, fake correspondence and photoshops can be created, and posts can be written with deliberately distorted details.

Forgery of identity

By hacking a user's page or creating a copy of it, the spread of false information and denigration of a person begins. On behalf of the victim, offensive messages are sent to friends, teachers (if we are talking about schoolchildren), etc.

Boycott

It often happens within a real team. The victim is excluded from general groups and chats, depriving her of the opportunity to participate in discussions and express her opinion. Any little thing that distinguishes a child from the rest can be a reason for a boycott within the class.

Disclosure of personal data

Publishing on the Internet any information about a person that is not in the public domain can lead to dire consequences for the victim. For example, it is enough to disseminate the home address of a famous person to cause her enormous trouble, even to the point of changing her place of residence. Also posting photos of an intimate nature or a source of income on the Internet without the person’s permission, etc. is a type of bullying.

Cyberstalking

Prolonged online harassment, accompanied by death threats and sexual harassment. The aggressor literally follows his victim everywhere - he marks himself in photographs, comments on any activity on the Internet, joins the same groups, sniffs out information from friends.

Open death threats

Comments and messages directly or indirectly contain descriptions of physical violence. Attempts are made to track down the victim in the real world, and “shooters” are assigned.

Cyberbullying often does not boil down to one type of bullying; it is multifaceted - it all depends on the imagination of the persecutor.

Why do people do this?

The reasons for starting to pursue a victim can be completely different - resentment, envy, anger. But the catalyst for the transition to active action is the seeming anonymity and permissiveness in the Internet environment.

Some aggressors were initially afraid of being among the victims themselves and therefore attack first. This often happens to witnesses to bullying. By humiliating other participants, they try to join a stronger group, or even lead it. If the goal is precisely to establish oneself as a leader, then the offender is more likely to use his personal account rather than an anonymous persona.

Representatives of other cultures and nationalities often become objects of ridicule. The lack of competent work to unite the team at school can lead to pronounced conflicts on interethnic grounds.

Anonymity and virtually limitless possibilities allow insecure, weak, and angry users to show themselves as strong and smart on the Internet. Such people, as a rule, choose their victims among those who are superior to them in some way.

Revenge is also a common cause of cyberattacks. An offended friend, partner, ex-boyfriend or girlfriend may initiate bullying to take revenge for their own grievances (whether real or imagined). Moreover, close relationships at one time allowed them to learn a lot of personal things about the victim, which worsens the latter’s situation.

The danger and consequences of cyberbullying for teenagers

First of all, enormous damage is caused to the victim of cyberbullying. Social ties are broken (at least that’s what it seems to a teenager), anxiety increases, headaches and nightmares occur, and mood drops. The teenager may develop depression and have suicidal thoughts.

The aggressor, fulfilling his unhealthy desires over and over again, feeds negative traits and aggravates his psychological problems. Remember that a mentally healthy person will never bully people, either in real life or in virtual life. Subsequently, such a teenager will find it difficult to build healthy relationships with other people.

Witnesses are also traumatized by being in an environment where conflict occurs. Most children are forced to take the position of an aggressor in order to avoid becoming a victim. If a “defender” appears in the group, then he has to withstand enormous pressure from the aggressive majority.

Unfortunately, it is in schools that cyberbullying most often begins. Therefore, parents and teachers should pay close attention to the atmosphere inside the classroom.

How to recognize cyberbullying

Any humiliating, offensive message that threatens human safety, as well as video clips and photographs posted on the Internet without the consent of the victim, in essence, can be classified as cyberbullying.

The phenomenon of cyberbullying also includes the creation of fake user profiles and Internet resources whose activities are aimed at denigrating a potential victim.

To understand the essence of the phenomenon of cyberbullying, we note that its participants are the following persons, among whom role positions are distributed:

- aggressor (offender);

- victim (passive or aggressive);

- witness;

— defender (optional element of communication).

What if I am a victim?

If you are faced with bullying, then immediately take measures to preserve your own self. The sooner you start building your defense, the less damage they will deal to you.

1. You can ignore the first message or send a complaint to the developers of the social network or messenger. If this was regular trolling or flaming, then ignoring will be the best way to protect yourself. Remember that you cannot be perfect for everyone, and if so, then why try for the sake of someone you barely know or a complete stranger?
2. If you feel that you are being bullied and humiliated systematically, protect yourself from this contact. Almost all instant messengers and social networks have the “File a complaint” and “Blacklist” functions.
3. Even if you communicate with a loved one, try not to transmit personal information or anything that could be used against you through social networks and instant messengers. Remember that anyone can be on the other side of the screen.
4. Don’t be afraid to report what’s happening to your senior management; try to resolve the conflict at an early stage. Don't be afraid to discuss this problem with colleagues, friends and loved ones. The more people who learn about the bully early in the bullying process, the less harm the victim will suffer.
5. If the job changes, and aggressors appear again and again, conduct an audit of your personality. What qualities attract pursuers so much? Perhaps a little work on yourself will allow you not only to free yourself from bullying, but also to reach a new professional level

Who suffers from cyberbullying

Despite the popular belief that this problem is childish, no one is immune from it. One study shows that 40% of adults have experienced some form of cyberbullying. However, teenagers are indeed at greatest risk, primarily due to the seriousness of the possible consequences. The peak of the threat occurs in grades 5-7. It is also important that in 41% of cases cyberbullying continued offline or arose from a real conflict situation. According to Kaspersky Lab., 26% of online conflicts escalated into real ones.

My child is a victim

All parents want their children to be healthy and happy, to have friends, a good class, the best teachers, and to remember their school years as a fun time. However, this is not always the case.

Unfortunately, many children face bullying at school, in the yard, and on the Internet. In Russia, according to statistics, 76% of children do not tell their parents that they have problems.

Signs that a child is being bullied online:

1. The child began to spend less time on the phone or, on the contrary, began to use it more often.
2. After being on the Internet, the teenager is depressed, irritable, and upset.
3. The child closes down, does not want to make contact, does not want to talk about who he communicated with and about what.
4. Academic performance is falling.
5. The child's appetite is impaired, headaches and other psychosomatic disorders appear.

Having noticed changes in the behavior of a teenager, parents need to try to get him to talk about what is happening . There is no need to put pressure and spy on the child: just say that you are always there and ready to help him. It happens that it is difficult for a child to admit that he has become a victim of bullying, especially if he is blackmailed with photographs or personal information. Invite him to write you a message or record an audio message, promise not to punish or scold him for what he tells.

As soon as you have confirmation of bullying, tell your child that this is not a normal situation and you must stop it together.

Modern technologies can help in this situation. You will either check whether your child is being bullied offline or online, or obtain evidence of bullying so that you can use it against the aggressor in the future. See what apps your child spends on and how much time they spend, know where they are and listen to what's going on around them with the Where Are My Kids app.

Protection plan

1. Teach your child to block unwanted visitors to his social networks. Find together the “complain” or “add to blacklist” functions - they are available on almost all Internet resources. For “passing hooligans” this will work almost instantly. If rumors, videos or photos are spread through a certain community or general chat where there is no way to directly remove insults, contact the administration of the community or site with a request to remove the unwanted content.
2. Set up a page on a social network, increase its security level, and delete all personal information that may become available to aggressors. Prohibit other users from tagging your child in photos and videos.
3. Do not respond to cyberbullying, do not engage in conversation with the offender. The aggressor’s task is to get as many emotions as possible in response, to feel superior. Ignoring his actions will eventually cause him to either make a mistake for which he can be prosecuted, or he will lose interest in the victim.
4. Try to find out who exactly is hurting your child. This will allow you to punish the offender in real life.
5. Take screenshots of correspondence, comments and other materials that will allow you to confirm your words. Yes, in Russia at the moment there are no laws in the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation that would directly punish cyberbullying , however, if there are threats or suspicions of harassment, this can be considered as grounds for initiating a criminal case. You should also remember that the state requires notarized screenshots of the pages. But if bullying occurs within the school walls, ordinary printouts will be enough for the administration.
6. Since cyberbullying often happens within the classroom or school, do not be afraid to involve the class teacher, social teacher, psychologist and administration in solving the problem. It is necessary to pay attention to this problem to help children improve relationships in the classroom and stop bullying.

Remember that trusting and warm relationships in the family will allow the child to turn to you for help as early as possible and receive minimal harm from cyberbullying.

Types of cyberbullying

There are several forms of cyberbullying that can be used against a victim. All of them have an equal impact on a person and can lead to tragic consequences.

1. Bullying. Bullying refers to the systematic violence of one person or group of people against the victim. Online it can be expressed in the form of sending messages with offensive nicknames and threats, hacking personal pages on social networks and spreading false rumors. This kind of cyberbullying is most often practiced in schools.
2. Trolling. With such cyberbullying, the goal becomes a banal provocation. They try to deliberately piss off the victim by sending various messages with unpleasant content. As a rule, bullies do this solely for their own pleasure.
3. Mobbing. The main feature of this form of cyberbullying is its mass nature - the victim is systematically bullied by several people at once. They may send messages ridiculing you, point out flaws in your appearance, or simply act hostile. Such actions are usually aimed at forcing a person to leave the team.
4. Flame. The main role in such cyberbullying is played by messages in the format of verbal warfare. The victim is insulted and provoked in order to develop the conflict even stronger even if it has already been exhausted.

My child is an aggressor

As you and I already know, aggressors are people who seek to assert themselves at the expense of a weaker victim. If you notice that a child is showing aggression for no apparent reason, is offending other children on the street, or perhaps trying to hurt you, you should not let the situation take its course. A simple punishment “a week without a phone” or “stand in a corner” is not enough here, and in some cases it can only do harm. Aggressive behavior in a child under three years of age is a normal, unconscious reaction, but the older a person gets, the better he learns to manage his emotions, including anger.

Thus, if a child is too aggressive, it is necessary to undergo an examination by a psychiatrist to rule out pathology of the nervous system. If the child is healthy, then you will have to work directly with relationships within the family and with relationships within the class (if there is evidence of problems at school). Here, of course, it is necessary to enlist the support of teachers and school administration. It is necessary to understand what exactly the child is trying to achieve with his behavior - attracting attention while in a vulnerable position, or trying to take a leadership position.

If a teenager is vulnerable, then it is necessary to help him get support and help without using force. Praise him often for correct behavior and ignore aggressive behavior. Learn to cope with outbursts of anger and aggression in socially acceptable ways (hitting a pillow, counting to ten, etc.). Perhaps enroll him in a sports section, where he can splash out his energy outside.

If you have a leader who strives for power, help him understand that fear is not a sign of respect and love. Show that an attentive, calm and balanced leader will always be more valuable than any tyrant. Also try to find an opportunity to use your leadership skills, for example, by inviting him to join the student council.

Reasons for cyberbullying

People often bully others when they want to gain recognition in a virtual community, show power and strength because they cannot show it in real life, or simply escape boredom. Bullying helps them get attention.

Cyberbullying against a specific person can be due to conflict based on national, political and cultural differences or a painful break in a relationship. People poison each other out of revenge, anger or envy, not having the courage to express their complaints in person.

Paradoxically, the cause of cyberbullying is cyberbullying itself or the fear of it. Victims of online insults (including potential ones) become aggressors because of the desire to take revenge on the offenders or to protect themselves from the attacks of others - “Now the victim is not me. Now I decide!

When mass bullying happens, instinct tells you to join the majority and behave the same way, so as not to end up on the side of the weak.

Will the law protect you?

At the moment, in the Russian Federation, a law on combating online harassment is under consideration. However, since cyberbullying is quite diverse in its manifestations, you can try to bring offenders under other articles of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation.

Today, there is judicial practice of punishing cyberbullies administratively and criminally for libel (Articles 128.1, 298.1 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation), insult (Article 130 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation), threat of physical violence (Articles 161–162 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation) , incitement to suicide (Article 110 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation) and indecent acts of a sexual nature (Article 135 of the Criminal Code of the Russian Federation).

In order for the case to have grounds, it is necessary to preserve as many facts of the persecution as possible - correspondence, screenshots, etc. All this must be notarized, since at the moment the Code of Judicial Procedure already sets out clear criteria for attaching screenshots to the case. It is also necessary to indicate and record the exact dates and times of the events that occurred and provide a link to the required page.