Forming a child’s personality is the first step in preparing him for adulthood. This is an important task for parents and society, and it is not limited to just teaching certain skills. To raise a mature personality, it is necessary not only to tell him about discipline, self-care and the like, but also to instill moral and ethical standards and spiritual values.
What is personality formation
Personality formation is a complex process that is not interrupted at any stage of human life. Simply put, it is infinite. The very concept of “personality” is very multifaceted, and there are two popular professional views on this phenomenon. One of them says that the formation of a child’s personality depends on natural innate data. The second opinion indicates that personality is a social phenomenon, and only society influences its formation.
In fact, the entire period of a person’s life, from birth to adulthood, is a process of personal growth or degradation. It is believed that development occurs in activities that are significant to the individual. The driving force can be called internal contradictions between the needs of a growing child and the real possibility of their implementation. The child’s activities are almost always determined by the parents and, to one degree or another, directed by them. Conclusion: the process of upbringing is the leading factor in the formation of a child’s personality.
Heredity
By heredity we mean those properties of an organism that are transmitted to children from parents through a certain genetic code. In this case, mainly physiological data is transmitted: the structure of the body, features of functioning, some diseases and inclinations for certain areas of activity (music, drawing).
If we talk about the concept of heredity, then the behavior and development of the individual are determined, first of all, due to the innate characteristics inherent in the formation of the organism. This can be confirmed by the expression: “talent will always find its way,” even under negative life circumstances and growth conditions.
It is believed that congenital inclinations or, in other words, heredity are fundamental. However, is this so? There are situations when a person changes over the years and discovers new facets of ability or works on the formation and development of such.
And as for the root cause in physiological characteristics, we can recall the stories of a human baby entering the animal world from the first days of life. For example, the wolf article. It was only in the cartoon that Mowgli was strong and brave; in reality, such children did not have speech or communication skills, and their habits completely copied the animals that were nearby.
Maybe society plays a key role after all, because man is a social being? Let's analyze in more detail the second condition, which has a significant impact on personality development.
Phases of personality development
There are three phases in the formation of a child’s personality
Adaptation
Lasts from birth until adolescence. The individual assimilates social experience - he adapts, imitates, adapts. During adaptation, there is an active adoption of social norms and mastery of various forms of activity. Having shown his own individuality in the group, the child cannot express himself as an individual until he masters the norms existing in the group.
He feels the need to be like others, adapting as much as possible in society. We can talk about a kindergarten or school.
Group activities can provoke the emergence of favorable conditions for the formation of the child’s personality and those traits that were not previously inherent in the individual, but which are characteristic of other members of the group.
Personalization
The child has a desire to oppose himself to others, to stand out. A critical attitude towards the norms of society and established social rules is formed. The impetus for individualization is the contradiction between the result of adaptation and the need for personalization that was not satisfied at the initial stage. The search begins for methods that help in gaining individuality and fixing it. This can manifest itself in behavior, clothing, speech, and so on. If, during the formation of a child’s personality, he has successfully coped with adaptation, then gradually he begins to understand that individuality is being lost. The individual mobilizes internal resources and begins to search for a society capable of providing the necessary personalization.
Integration
The child has a desire to find his place in society, to fit into society. Integration is easy if society accepts the person. Other results are also possible. A person tries in every possible way to preserve his difference, which leads to aggressive interaction with society and people. Integration is characterized by contradictions between the subject’s desire to demonstrate his own individuality and the community’s desire to cultivate and approve only those individual qualities of the subject that correspond to its preferences.
Habitat
Of course, the environment and communication with people largely determine the personality; the child absorbs the culture, norms and rules of behavior accepted in a certain society. And people of different nationalities and cultures can be radically different. Thus, we come to the conclusion that everything is closely interconnected.
Naturally, family, friends, kindergarten and school have a great influence on a person. The child is taught to certain norms and rules of behavior, and the foundations are laid for the formation of moral principles. Under the influence of the people around them, children learn role-playing games, behavior patterns, absorb and learn a huge amount of knowledge thanks to the school curriculum.
Proponents of the “environment” theory believe that a person, like a blank slate, comes into this world, and parents and environment write and create personality. However, we often hear comments that even in the same family, under equal conditions, children are completely different? This means that the natural principle also has a great influence on the development of personality.
What factors influence the development of a child’s personality?
Many factors influence the formation of a child's personality. From a number of theories put forward by various psychologists, the main idea should be highlighted: personality development occurs on the basis of natural data, self-awareness and life experience. Formation begins at an early age.
Internal factors influencing: temperament, inherent at the genetic level. External factors: upbringing, social level, environment, and even the current era.
Many experts believe that genes have a significant influence on personality, containing information about the ancestors of the mother and father. A newborn person continues two genera at once. This does not mean that he will receive their character traits or talents. Nature will provide him with a basis for development, and all he has to do is use it.
The significance of the biological factor is high. This explains how people who grow up under the same conditions become unique and exhibit opposite qualities. Biological factors are the basis for the formation of a child’s personality. Socialization plays an equally significant role. Development occurs in stages. The perception of the world is influenced by the upbringing received by a person and the example of his parents.
Controversy and progress
Contradictory personality is a quality that Freud and other psychologists talked about. Man is structured in a rather interesting way and is constantly in interaction with the world around him. At the same time, every day he makes decisions and makes life choices, and it happens that he goes against the grain of his immediate environment in his judgments and enters into confrontation.
We can also recall situations when we have an internal conflict and struggle between different parts of the personality - an adult, a child, a teacher. Or maybe this is a conflict between good and evil, it’s hard to say, the main thing is that in these moments the truth is born, it is important to find yourself and form the necessary qualities.
The desire for progress - it is natural that everyone wants to achieve success in life; in the process of overcoming life's obstacles, on the way to the goal, character is strengthened and the strong-willed qualities of the individual are formed. All life situations are lessons that we go through, and as a reward we receive a new “I”, with new and even better qualities.
Self-development
Personal self-development - we constantly improve ourselves by working on our inner world, subordinating mental processes and emotions to our will, improving character traits. Such work can be done either independently or through special training. Each person determines for himself how it is easier for him to develop. The main thing is the desire to achieve new results, constantly work on shaping your personality, and search for the necessary information and knowledge.
Development can also act as a protective function. A person is constantly developing, both physically and spiritually, this is necessary for survival in our world. A successful life requires certain qualities, such as immunity to fight diseases, willpower to achieve results, and patience is an important weapon for conquering peaks. Naturally, for a full life we need: good health, high intellectual and spiritual qualities, which we develop in the process of life, voluntarily or involuntarily, under the influence of life circumstances.
Thus, we have examined the patterns of personality development, and now we better understand the cause-and-effect relationships. Of course, our development is influenced by many factors, the conditions for the development of a person’s personality, and yet we are happy that we can correct our life and development through our own efforts.
Topic: Personal growth
Education and personality formation in the family: the importance of parents
Psychologists are convinced that parents have a decisive influence on a child’s personality, his perception of the world, feelings and aspirations. The relationship between father and mother, as well as between other relatives, is important to him. The attitude of the family directly towards the child plays a huge role.
The surrounding social environment also influences the formation of personality. Education is a purposeful process of influencing a person, and it is precisely this that is at the basis of the cultivation of personality.
Many people ask the question: “What plays a decisive role in personal development and consciousness - natural forces, social environment?” It is impossible to single out anything separately, but it is obvious that the first years of human life are fundamental. Children growing up in a family largely adopt their parents’ behavior, attitudes, and values. Subsequently, the personality may acquire additional minor touches, but it is in childhood that the foundation is laid. If the father and mother pay little attention to the baby, then he receives “material” for development from other available sources, which are not always beneficial. Parents should remember this and take care of daily quality interaction with their child. At an early age, reading fairy tales helps a lot, as it instills in the child an understanding of good and evil. Be sure to analyze what you read and think through other options for developing the story.
The process of education as the basis for the personal development of children of different ages
The process of comprehensive personality education is labor-intensive. The definition of essence consists of what is included in the understanding of the educational impact on the child. For some it is obedience, for others it is punishment. However, the basis of the upbringing process should be the multilateral development of the child’s abilities and the formation, based on the existing base of natural inclinations, of a harmonious, full-fledged system called personality.
In any situation, the basis of the education process is the family. Its influence is discussed in the works of psychologists and teachers. In the absence of mother and father, this role is assigned to the child’s immediate environment. However, it is in a full-fledged harmonious family that the prerequisites for an adequate personality begin to form, traditions and customs are passed on, which in the future will form a worldview system. The manner of behavior that was a model for him in childhood will be the personal norm throughout the rest of his life. The role of family traditions in the formation of personality is enormous. They allow family values and cultural characteristics to be passed on to subsequent generations, helping to maintain continuity.
For a young child, healthy family relationships are a priority. Rarely does a person as an adult be able to change the existing negative standard. In this case, the person must go through a difficult path of reassessment of values.
Education should not become an end in itself for parents. However, their task is to ensure development in such a way as to create optimal conditions for the purposeful formation of a harmonious personality and prepare it for further life in society. Some parents try to be perfect. You shouldn't be afraid to make mistakes. They are the basis for working on yourself and self-improvement. Moreover, we are talking not only about a child, but also about an adult. Parents must teach their child to be responsible for their actions and take responsibility for their life.
When organizing the education process, you should take into account some features of age-related development. Until the age of three, attention to him and his problems is of great importance for a child. At this age, mother and child are one. Therefore, ignoring requests and appeals is dangerous for mental development. At this age, the child’s cognitive activity is great. Dangerous objects should be excluded from visibility so that the learning process is accompanied only by positive emotions.
After three years, according to ideas in psychology, a child learns to manipulate an adult. Therefore, it is necessary to clearly define the concepts “possible” and “impossible”. The determining system of relations between an adult and a child should be explanatory and contractual. At the age of 5 to 7 years, a child develops fears. The main thing during this period is not to contribute to the development of phobias, but to gently destroy negative emotions.
What mistakes do parents make when raising individuals?
When shaping a child’s personality, it is important for parents to avoid such common mistakes.
Categorical prohibition
The main mistake of education. Be patient with your baby and respect him. Without learning to understand it, parents make inevitable mistakes that lead to mental and physical problems. By ignoring the desires and interests of the child, responding to most of them with categorical prohibitions, you can even skip the initial stage of some disease. Example: you notice that the child has started eating lime. The first reaction of most parents: dissatisfaction, screaming, a ban on approaching the wall. Correct reaction: visit the doctor. The doctor will probably tell you that there is a lack of calcium salts in the baby’s body. In addition, such an attitude will create in the child a desire to perform certain actions on the sly. Many become secretive and distrustful.
Overprotection
When shaping a child’s personality, overprotection is not the best helper. Excessive care can have a negative effect on the baby. When he reaches a certain age and tries to show independence, this is often met with hostility. Example: a child wants to use a spoon himself, but the mother, fearing that he will get dirty or not be able to cope, continues to feed him herself.
Overprotection manifests itself in violent action, which can result in the emergence of neurosis. In other cases, guardianship unless absolutely necessary can result in the child never being able to make friends, because the mother and grandmother are always nearby. The individual may have difficulties with socialization; he does not acquire the ability to express and defend his opinion. Possible consequences: psychological problems that can only be eliminated with the assistance of specialists.
Excessive demands
For the full development of a child’s personality, it is necessary that he not only knows, but also understands what is allowed and what is prohibited. If you show excessive demands on him, without giving clear explanations of the reasons why you need to do as you say, then this will not lead to good. What traits will the personality acquire? Irritability, stubbornness. The best option: parents explain in detail the reasons for their demands, and over time they become the child’s personal beliefs.
Notations
The first factor provoking children's protest is lengthy lectures. Parents often believe that their child will learn information better by listening to long and repetitive lectures. There is no need for them. This approach has no constructive component. Particularly taboo is other children being held up as examples. Gradually, the child will begin to perceive them as personal enemies. Boring notations often cause a negative reaction, losing their educational value.
Immense pampering of a child
Parents who spoil their children too much create a big problem. This phenomenon is no less negative than lack of influence. Spoiled children, who do not know anything to be denied, who have no responsibilities, eventually face the impossibility of overcoming even minor life obstacles and problems. When a situation arises when their desires and reality do not coincide, they lead to overstrain of the nervous system, which can result in a breakdown.
When is a personality type formed?
In the first series, researchers tried to figure out how we become individuals with our own individuality, abilities and worldview.
Psychologist Emily Jones tested whether temperament is determined at six months. Children were shown toys that could surprise or frighten them - and the reaction corresponded to the three main types of temperament that psychologists identify in adults: excitable, calm, alert. This may mean that we are already born with a certain type, and it is this that determines our future personality.
Some are naturally more fearful, others are calmer or more active. Parents naturally adapt to their children's characteristics, without always realizing it. These differences arose through evolution: giving the baby what he needs based on his unique personality type. A leisurely baby should be gradually accustomed to new things, but a more active baby should be taken for walks more often and shown different places.
Temperament is how we react to what is happening around us. And personality is formed under the influence of signals that we receive in response from the world around us.
Is it possible to speed up speech development if you talk to your child more? Speech development specialist Michelle Peter conducted an experiment in which they calculated how many words a 1.9-year-old baby says daily and how many words adults say to him. On the first day, the researchers simply recorded the results, and on the second they asked the parents to talk to their son as much as possible at every opportunity.
On the first day, parents said 1.3 thousand words, on the second - about 5% more. The baby spoke about 2.5 thousand words on the first day, and on the second day - already 2.8 thousand. The increase was almost 13%. But the main thing is that the parents exchanged remarks with their son more often, and the volume of dialogues increased by 38%. And this is very important for speech development.
It is adults who can lay the foundation for future academic success from the first years of life. Research conducted recently at Stanford University in California confirmed that the more words a child hears in the first years of life, the larger his vocabulary will be later. And at school this will help him improve his performance. And parents do not need any special knowledge - they just need to talk with their sons and daughters as often as possible.
How well young children control their emotions. Dr Emily Jones decided to test what happens in children's brains when they are told not to give in to temptation. The kids were brought an interesting glow stick, but their mothers forbade them to touch it. At this time, using a brain scanner, the slightest activity of neurons in the prefrontal cortex was recorded: it is this part of the brain that is responsible for behavior, emotions, thoughts, feelings.
Some kids lasted only a few seconds, some even grabbed a toy as soon as the countdown began. They behaved this way not because they were naughty - they simply had not yet developed neural connections that would help them resist and not take the toy.
There were also children who consciously resisted the desire, tried to be distracted and not think about the toy. They lasted 45 seconds. The sensors recorded the activity of the prefrontal cortex in their brains: areas that are responsible for self-control, the reward system and motivation in adults are visible.
In order to develop the ability to control emotions, it is necessary to give freedom of action when the child explores the world around him and learns to manage his own behavior.
What conditions will ensure successful personality formation?
Important conditions for the formation of a child’s personality.
Example of parents
It is important for a child to see that mom and dad do not follow a certain script, but really live a happy and fulfilling life. It is impossible to make another person happy if you yourself are unhappy. Many psychologists note that people who do not experience inner harmony often complain about problems in relationships with children. Only happy parents will be able to truly understand their child by building a trusting relationship with him. This contributes to the successful formation of personality. When trying to help your child with this, start with yourself. Reflect: do you know how to accept your feelings, do you allow yourself to truly be happy and sad. Or maybe you are restraining yourself and teaching your child excessive restraint, thereby suppressing his personality.
Communication with others
Show by example how to communicate with other people. Give yourself a little test by honestly answering the question: “Are you able to have an unbiased conversation with a person with whom you disagree in some aspects?” Is there a possibility that you are trying to impose an opinion on another person or are you submitting to someone else’s will? The child will probably adopt this feature from you.
Don’t impose your opinion and position – just share your values. Have you heard the definition of “heartfelt conversation”? Such dialogues arise when a person is ready to understand the interlocutor and share his opinion. In relationships, a person develops, allow yourself to learn new things and teach this to your child.
Care and attention
A person who has felt care and attention at the dawn of development will certainly feel confident and protected. Mother and father become important life references, exerting serious influence. It is great if a mother can demonstrate such qualities as forgiveness, acceptance, love. The child needs to feel affection and warmth. In a father, strictness and gentleness are important, acting undividedly.
Parents are the most important stage in the formation of personality. Everyone knows the words that raising children should begin with their own upbringing. Start with yourself if you want to help your child’s personality acquire important facets.
