A perfectionist is a person who is highly idealized?

Antonyms for Perfectionist

Word starting with p. Perfectionist (13 letters)
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You are on the page for the word “Perfectionist”. Here you will find antonyms for the word “Perfectionist”. What are the opposite words for Perfectionist? The word “Blunderer” is the antonym of the word “Perfectionist”. This word belongs to the same part of speech, has a similar lexical meaning, but differs in sound and spelling. The antonym of the word “Perfectionist” (Tyap-lyapschik) can be used in various texts to make the sentence opposite in meaning. Perhaps it will be possible to express your thought more logically in one context or another by choosing the opposite word “Tip-Tapper” for the word “Perfectionist”. The antonym of the word “Perfectionist” has its own meaning. In order to avoid making common mistakes when using antonyms for the word “Perfectionist”, for example “Tyap-lyapschik”, you need to refer to their interpretation and ultimately choose the most appropriate one for the situation.

Most likely you will need additional information about the word “Perfectionist”. This page shows the word "some-caker", for which the word "Perfectionist" is an antonym.

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Excellent student syndrome

The word “perfectionist” is most often used in a positive sense. Saying “I am a perfectionist in everything!” or “At work he is a perfectionist,” people want to emphasize their own or others’ merits, the desire to do everything perfectly. In fact, if a person is truly a perfectionist, then most likely he faces serious problems in life that can affect his mental and physical health.

“Perfectionism has several stages. The first, in which you can spend your whole life, is the desire to do everything in the best possible way, ideally, and there is nothing wrong with that, because it helps to achieve your goals and success,” explains psychologist Mikhail Khors. - But a significant part of perfectionists go to the next stage, when perfectionism already becomes a disease, turns into patho-perfectionism, a neurasthenic form, when the desire for perfection passes into all spheres of life, at this stage suffering and pain appear if it is not possible to achieve the ideal. The patho-perfectionist will suffer and worry if there is a threat to his ability to do the job in the best possible way. To be irritated, afraid, anxious, even if nothing has happened yet, to experience unpleasant mental states, and they will take away his resources of strength, and there will not be enough strength to realize his aspirations.”

A psychologist compares the state of a failed perfectionist to the withdrawal symptoms of a drug addict. Life becomes gray for him and seems wrong.

“A healthy person, if it didn’t work out, asks himself the questions: “Why didn’t it work out?”, “What mistakes did I make?”, “What resources were not enough?”, then asks the question: “How can I get these resources?”, “How to avoid making such mistakes?” — gets up, dusts himself off and continues on towards his goal. Not so with a perfectionist. He flies to his goal and sometimes achieves it by taking it impudently, but if it doesn’t work out, he suffers.”

A perfectionist experiences suffering quite often not only because of his own failures, but also because he is dependent on external circumstances that he cannot influence.

“This condition is often called excellent student syndrome, and rightly so: as a rule, perfectionists manifest themselves already at school, sometimes even in kindergarten,” says psychiatrist Mikhail Gordeev.

Socially approved perfectionism is actually not so good: people with inflated demands on themselves and others have difficulty both at work and in their personal lives.

“It is a mistake to think that perfectionists are born bosses. Often these are bad leaders, says Mikhail Gordeev. - Firstly, because such a boss demands excessively from his subordinates, and he has problems with staff - people do not stand up to the boss’s standards, his nagging and leave. And secondly, because a perfectionist, realizing that he is leading idiots, takes on the work that he should delegate to others, since he is sure that no one will do it as well as he does. As a result, he gets stressed out and overloaded.”

Another problem for perfectionists is deadlines. He can complete the task perfectly, but he will spend much more time and effort on it than his colleagues.

“There is such a model of success - 20 percent of efforts give 80 percent of success, it’s just important to find what to spend these efforts on effectively,” says Gordeev. - But for a perfectionist this is impossible, he needs to get 100 percent of success, even if 200, 300 percent of effort is spent on it. They tend to become good professionals, but it is very difficult for their colleagues to work with them. Another feature of a perfectionist: if he does something and fails, he will not try to correct it and move on, but will start all over again.”

Signs and characteristics of a perfectionist woman

A cocktail of pathological striving for ideals and a tendency towards emotionality and sensitivity - what is the drink?

At home

He wipes, washes, scrubs - snow-white wallpaper, shiny baseboards, clean, like in an operating room. He lashes out at his family if they threaten the established order.

At work

Performs tasks pedantically and meticulously: ideal for working with papers, analytics, and statistics. As a boss, like a male perfectionist, she is unbearable.

In a relationship

Perfect if the partner matches her picture of relationships, family, love. When something (even a small thing) is out of schedule and the order established by her is violated, she will try to return it to the mainstream, and if she fails to achieve success, she will break the connection.

“Help teach them to live correctly”

The situation when at work a person is demanding of himself and his staff, strives for the ideal, but in his personal life it is easy to get along with him, according to psychologists, is rare. Most often, problems extend to family and interpersonal relationships. Mikhail Gordeev claims that it is difficult for such people to create a couple and maintain a family.

“For them, the concept of “building a family” does not mean creating, but training, adjusting to themselves. And until a certain moment, the partner endures, because at the beginning there is a bouquet period, love, emotions, children are born, and then there is no strength left.

Perfectionists come to psychotherapy more often than phlegmatic people or people who are calm about their successes in order to cope with increased anxiety, panic attacks, and addictions.

“Panic attacks are a consequence of an overloaded nervous system,” explains psychologist Mikhail Khors. — Addictions are a consequence of avoiding a reality in which a person experiences constant pain. However, he does not believe that his perfectionism is a problem. And the psychologist’s task is to show him the reason. Unfortunately, the modern approaches of many of my colleagues are to work with consequences that are removed with pills, the same as antidepressants. But they will not affect perfectionism in any way; they affect the symptom, not the source of pain. And after some time the problems will return.”

The anxiety of perfectionists is increased by the cult of success and the idea of ​​limitless possibilities, which are actively promoted by famous coaches, says the psychologist.

“For example, Tony Robbins and many of his colleagues teach that there is no bar for opportunity. I don't agree with this, every person has limitations. Yes, we try, we give our best, we work, but I would like to remind you that not everything in life depends on us. And it happens that the obstacle is within ourselves - fears, complexes, ignorance of something - they also stop us. More than half of the European population is on antidepressants because they are so pumped up that they can do everything, that they have to smile, be forever happy, energetic, successful, and they are living people. People cannot be happy forever. The modern and popular approach to the fact that a person cannot be in negative states leads to the fact that he forbids himself from them and contradicts his essence.”

In therapy, perfectionists learn to be calm about the imperfections of others, to accept that the world does not work the way they want, that people can do bad things, be wrong, behave badly, that they have the right to beliefs that are different from their own beliefs .

“Such patients should never be told that they are wrong. For them this is a disaster,” says Gordeev. - No, on the contrary, he is good, but he can become even better if he accepts that the world is not ideal, that it does not always rain at the right time, and so on. We are talking about the price he pays for his idealistic attitude towards life. When it comes to relationship problems, I immediately ask the patient's blood pressure numbers, and I don't remember them ever being normal. And a person begins to understand this. We teach you to be calm about other opinions if they are not ideal, to delegate authority when it comes to a team, and we teach you to appreciate the advantages of others.”

Healthy and neurotic perfectionism: how to develop the first and get rid of the second

The word “perfectionism” came to European languages ​​from Latin: perfectus - “absolute perfection.” In modern psychology, perfectionism is the subject’s desire for perfection, high personal standards, a person’s desire to bring the results of any of his activities to meet the highest standards; this is the need for perfection of the products of their activities.

Many marketers, designers, quality managers, programmers, etc. are ready to polish the results of their work ad infinitum, if they are not limited by deadlines and do not control intermediate results. For perfectionists, the concept of “necessary and sufficient” does not exist.

1. The structure of perfectionism

Clinical psychologist Hollander (1978) was one of the first to define perfectionism as the everyday practice of demanding higher quality performance from oneself than circumstances require. Burns (1980) made an important clarification by adding to the picture of perfectionism a cognitive dimension - thinking in terms of “all or nothing”, in which only two options for performing an activity are allowed - full compliance with high standards or complete failure.

Canadian researchers have put forward an idea of ​​the structure of perfectionism, which includes four parameters:

1. Self-addressed perfectionism . Involves debilitatingly high standards, constant self-evaluation and censoring of one's own behavior, and a motive for striving for perfection that varies in intensity among individuals. This is the tendency to set standards for oneself that are higher than those of others in the performance of something, against the background of the inability to accept and forgive oneself for imperfections or mistakes in the performance of one’s work.
2. Other-directed perfectionism: Beliefs and expectations about other people's abilities. Assumes unrealistic standards for significant others in the immediate environment, expectations of human perfection, and constant evaluation of others. It creates frequent accusations against other people, a lack of trust, and feelings of hostility towards people.
3. Perfectionism addressed to the world as a whole: the conviction that everything in the world should be accurate, accurate, correct, and that all human and global problems should receive correct and timely solutions.
4. Socially prescribed perfectionism reflects the need to meet the standards and expectations of significant others. It reflects the belief that other people are unrealistic in their expectations, tend to judge very harshly, and put pressure on the individual to be perfect. Along with this, the individual is convinced of his own inability to please others.

2. Two types of perfectionism: healthy and neurotic (destructive)
Observing the high achievements of creative figures who did not show neurotic deviations, researchers began to talk about healthy perfectionism and pathological (destructive). Psychologist Donald Hamachek (1978) was the first to point this out:

• Healthy perfectionism: a person exhibits leadership qualities, high performance, activity, motivation to achieve a goal, while the person sensibly assesses his real abilities, i.e. has an adequate level of aspirations. During work, such a person may experience a slight degree of excitement and excitement; his attention is focused on his own capabilities and on ways to achieve the goal. A person sets himself high standards and difficult to achieve goals and at the same time enjoys such goals, and most importantly, the process of achieving them. Due to this, a person has high self-esteem.
• Neurotic perfectionism is driven by fear of failure. For such a perfectionist, the desire to become even better becomes a fixed idea, so he is always dissatisfied. A neurotic perfectionist, in order to show that he deserves love and universal respect, takes as a guideline a certain standard that does not correspond to his potential. If healthy perfectionism consists of the belief that the best result can (and should) be achieved, then with neurotic perfectionism there is a belief that an imperfect result of work is unacceptable. A neurotic perfectionist sets deliberately impossible goals and standards for himself and moves towards them not out of pleasure or ambition, but out of fear of failure and rejection. As a result, the pursuit of the ideal turns into self-torture.

3. Perfectionism for business: benefit or harm?
People have different attitudes towards perfectionism. Its supporters note that the desire for ideals (often bordering on elementary everyday tediousness for those around us) is in many ways what makes a person a true master of his craft. A musician hones his skills, a writer throws another unsuccessful manuscript into the trash bin in order to ultimately produce a truly worthwhile product. Perfectionism pushes people to constantly develop, learn, and not stand still. However, it is unclear whether these traits are a consequence of developed perfectionism or whether these traits predispose to the formation of perfectionism?

The desire for perfection is a commendable quality if it does not develop into a desire to achieve the ideal, when a person again and again changes and corrects what no longer requires correction. Then a person wastes time and energy in vain to achieve an unattainable goal, and for creative people this becomes a disaster. Often, a small improvement requires large changes, and the task turns into a boring routine, which wastes a huge amount of time and effort.

Perfectionists tend to tie their sense of self-worth to work performance and therefore spend too much time on unnecessary details, which slows down the pace of work and reduces overall productivity. A perfectionist often waits for conditions to arise so that the ideal product of his activity appears immediately. He spends a lot of time “licking” minor details. This is where Voltaire said: “The best is the enemy of the good.”

In addition, in order not to spoil their own impeccable image, perfectionists can hide the mistakes they have made or refuse to carry out their plans or activities. They begin to act on the “all or nothing” principle. As a result, while perfectionists wait for ideal conditions to occur or prepare themselves for some big accomplishment in the future, others begin their actions in the present, make mistakes and learn from them.

Another most common form of avoidant behavior is the so-called procrastination - postponing the start of an activity due to the desire to complete it completely, which makes this start difficult and unpleasant. The trouble with a perfectionist is that he doesn’t start a job until he puts everything together perfectly in his head, and this may never happen.

Perfectionism is also harmful from an economic point of view. The inability to complete a task leads to a delay in the deadlines allotted for its completion, and in a situation where too much time is spent on a product, its price increases. But at a high price, the product turns out to be unnecessary.

4. The genesis of perfectionism

A perfectionistic orientation begins to form very early, usually at primary school age, and sometimes even earlier. Factors of family upbringing are decisive in its occurrence. According to Hamachek (1978), neurotic perfectionism stems from childhood experiences with disapproving or inconsistently approving parents whose love is contingent on the child's performance.

In the first case, the child strives to become perfect not only in order to avoid the disapproval of others, but in order to finally accept himself through superhuman efforts and tremendous achievements. In the second case, the child begins to realize that only good performance of an activity makes him valuable. The parents of a perfectionist are overly critical, demanding and generally provide significantly less support to the child. The child is forced to be “flawless” in order to satisfy parental expectations and avoid criticism.

Four types of parental behavior have been identified that have an impact on the formation of a child’s perfectionistic thinking:

1. parents are overly critical and demanding;
2. parental expectations and standards are excessively high; the criticism is not direct, but indirect;
3. parental approval is absent or inconsistent and conditional;
4. Perfectionist parents serve as models for teaching perfectionist attitudes and behaviors.

S. S. Stepanov (2005) notes that the main provoking factor is the authoritarian parenting style, which combines high demands, a strict disciplinary regime and insufficient emotional support and participation.
In such conditions, great expectations are placed on the child - he must justify his parents’ aspirations, increase his parents’ achievements and avoid their mistakes. You should not make incorrect comparisons of the child with his peers, but you should explain to the child that it is impossible to surpass everyone in everything. It is also important not to equate failure in some endeavor with the child’s personal flaws. No one is immune from failures; they are an integral element of any activity, including educational activities. It is important to learn to regard failure as an indication that a certain solution is unacceptable and the need to look for another. A wrong step is subject first of all to correction and only in certain exceptional cases - to condemnation, and condemnation precisely as an incorrect, unworthy action, and not as a property of the person who committed it.

5. How to deal with destructive perfectionism: practical recommendations

Elimination of destructive perfectionism is achieved by using the following techniques:

• Realistic goal setting. You need to learn to compromise with yourself. On the one hand, meet your high standards, and on the other, fulfill your obligations on time. To do this, you need to train yourself to make a list of tasks every day and be sure to determine the highest priority ones, as well as the deadlines for their completion. Then, throughout the day, you need to periodically review the list - this will prevent you from getting hung up on any one task.
• Delegation. Perfectionists tend to take on everything on themselves, even when working in a team. Then their results are perceived as general. Therefore, you need to force yourself, on occasion, to give some of your tasks to other people.

In most cases, you can curb the perfectionist in yourself by following simple recommendations.

1. Take a moment and think about why you are constantly re-testing yourself, spending too much time on activities that you can handle in a minute? Write down what prevents you from working without errors and failures. Usually the reason for this is fear (“I am terrified of making a mistake and constantly have to check what has already been done”, “I don’t remember whether I did this work at all or not”, “I am ashamed of not fulfilling my promise, although this work, Looks like I can't do it." Analyze how real your fears are, whether they are (at least partly) the fruit of your own fantasies. Think about it, you are conscientious about your work, right? Why then do you keep yourself in such tension? Why don’t you trust yourself, your knowledge and professionalism? How critical are the mistakes you might make? Try to do only what you can do.
2. Give yourself the right to be imperfect in your work. Realize that an imperfect job completed today is always better than a perfect job put off forever. The Japanese have a saying: “Almost perfect is better than perfect.” Striving for excellence is great, but it's important not to get too caught up in it. Try to understand that there is no limit to improvement and no one can say that the ideal has been achieved, because the criterion of perfection is subjective, it is different for everyone and you cannot please everyone. Think about the line from the poem by the poet G. Alexandrov: “Having reached perfection on foot, do not become a decrepit sack.”
3. Before starting each more or less significant task, do a little preparatory work with yourself. Assess why this work is needed, which will depend on the results of its implementation. Decide how much time and effort you are willing to give to her, based on her real importance in your life. After that, make every effort to stay within these limits. Even if you have to sacrifice the quality of some details.
4. If you just can’t get started on something because you’re afraid that you won’t do it well, use the following technique. Answer yourself the question: what terrible thing will happen if I don’t succeed? More often than not, you won’t be able to come up with anything truly terrible. So why not try it?
5. Give yourself the right to at least three mistakes a day. The one who does nothing makes no mistakes. Take criticism constructively: criticism is a sign of interest in your work. If you are criticized, they believe that you can do an even better job.
6. If perfectionism has reached a “chronic stage,” try keeping a time tracker. Write down there all the time spent on solving any problem. The entry looks something like this: “I thought about passing the balance - 30 minutes; adjusted the balance - 2 hours 45 minutes; looked for inaccuracies - 3 hours 15 minutes; made changes - 4 hours; total: 8 hours 30 minutes.” When the stages of work are expressed in numbers, it is much easier to manage them.
7. Learn to find and separate what is important and what is unimportant. Understand that timeliness is also a category of quality. Don't get hung up on the smallest details.
8. If possible, take a break for a couple of days and look at the work you've done with fresh eyes. It may not seem as bad as you previously thought.

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How do people become perfectionists?

Nadezhda Solovyova, a psychiatrist at the Scientific Center for Personalized Medicine, believes that perfectionism can be innate and acquired.

“A person has an endopsyche - something that is inherited, something that cannot be corrected, and an exopsyche - something that a person acquires throughout life and with which one can work. Perfectionists and those who don’t really worry about anything have both components. If the genotype contains anxiety, if it is an endopsychic component, then a person has a greater chance of becoming a perfectionist. And then his environment and upbringing shape him. If a child's loved ones are worried, he will try to imitate adults. If the environment is relaxed and phlegmatic, the child will adapt to it. But in adolescence he will begin to choose for himself.”

Psychiatrist Mikhail Gordeev believes that the influence of parents on the formation of a perfectionist is stronger than heredity.

“It happens that perfectionist parents raise perfectionists. And sometimes parents themselves could not achieve something in life, but consider it very important and realize their aspiration through the child. This, in their opinion, is what their child should achieve, he should be the best, despite the fact that the parent himself could not do this.”

Mikhail Gordeev notes that perfectionists in childhood were subjected to moral punishment for failures, for example, a mother might not talk to her child for several days for bad behavior, a bad grade, a bad grade, or a bad grade, or not learning a lesson.

“Perfectionism is a state that is brought up by the fear of punishment, and we are not just talking about physical punishment. Moral rejection can be much worse for a child than deprivation of sweets, a ban on walks and cartoons, even physical punishment. And when a perfectionist grows up, he is no longer afraid of rejection from his mother, but from friends, colleagues, and lover; for him, the punishment is disrespect and rejection from others.”

Perfectionists are not only afraid of disrespect, they are afraid of being embarrassed. And these attitudes are also laid down by close adults.

“These fears are social, they are normal for our lives, the question is how strong they are,” says Mikhail Khors.

Perfectionists often hear phrases from parents: “You must be the best,” “You only need to study for A’s,” “A B is a bad grade.”

“There are a lot of such parents,” explains the psychologist. — When such a child is faced with the fact that he cannot always be the first, to get an A in life, he first goes into achievement: “Oh, it’s not working out? I’ll work harder,” but at some point he hits the bar and faces a situation where he can’t do it. Maybe it doesn’t work out now, but it will work out in a year, but he needs it right now. And then his pain appears.”

Children, from whom their parents do not demand to be the best, grow up as more harmonious individuals, Horse believes.

“Such a parent does not have this feeling of inferiority, which he tries to satisfy at the expense of the child; he loves and appreciates the child, regardless of his success. He brings him up in a more realistic-philosophical atmosphere, more phlegmatic: “You’re doing great, go ahead, try, but if it doesn’t work out, it’s okay, you get up, dust yourself off and move on.”

I am a Perfectionist, what to do, how to live with it?

Do nothing if the form of perfectionism is healthy: you want to work for pleasure and to achieve high results, you know how to stop if you understand that the matter is losing, you don’t quit halfway if you know that a reward awaits you in the end. This is healthy self-criticism.

Remember: perfection is hardly achievable, so be able to limit perfectionist tendencies without leading them to the point of absurdity. Jumping over tile joints is a fun game for a child, but a psychological disorder for an adult.

Feeling that the desire for ideal is pressing, stop: set short-term goals (they are easier to achieve), remember what has already been done (will give confidence), redirect some of the work to colleagues/family/friends (learn to trust people).

The antipode of a perfectionist

The opposite of perfectionism is relaxed, phlegmatic individuals who do not suffer from failure. They are not particularly worried that their boss scolded them at work, that they cannot buy the car of their dreams, they will not worry about rudeness on public transport, or get angry at their family for scattering socks and toys. But considering them indifferent, devoid of empathy and goals in life is also wrong, says Mikhail Gordeev.

“Just like for a perfectionist, for such a person in life something is more important, something less important.

According to Gordeev, a student who is not at all worried about failing at school and is not successful in his studies can later achieve great success in the field of creativity.

“Perhaps he clearly knew from childhood that he needed something else,” explains Mikhail Gordeev. — If a person is not worried about failure at work or in school, he may have another area of ​​interest. Can we call the classic Manilov indifferent, who always thinks about something, dreams, but does nothing? It's hard to say, you can call him a dreamer. It’s just that his ideals are not recognized by society.”

Antipodean perfectionists can also become clients of a psychotherapist, despite a calmer attitude towards other people’s and their own mistakes, says psychiatrist Nadezhda Solovyova.

“If we talk about neuroses, minor psychiatry, about overcoming some kind of disorder, anxiety, panic attacks, then both come. For severe perfectionists, the problem is anxiety. And the so-called “don’t care” people have apathy, depression and sociopathy. And inside such people can feel their inadequacy and suffer from it. And in fact, both perfectionism and indifference are two defensive reactions of the psyche that say that a person has problems.”

Who is a perfectionist? Meaning of the word

• A person who strives to complete work with 6 points on a 5-point system.
• A person who cannot refuse to carry out a task that is recognized as unprofitable, and its further development is disastrous.
• Finally, a person who does not “know how” to step on the seams of tiles and cannot go to bed until he has eliminated all the debris in his apartment or trimmed the uneven grass in his yard.

(Look at the photo)

These are graduated definitions (in fact, the concept and meaning of perfectionism is multifaceted and can manifest itself in different ways): from positive to neurotic.

Some people think that a perfectionist is very afraid of responsibility. This is wrong!

Synonyms

There are no official synonyms for perfectionism. There are also no adjacent or close phenomena.

The following words are actively used in everyday life:

• perfection;
• ideal;
• impeccability;
• perfection;
• absolute, etc.

Antonyms

The concept of destructionism becomes antonymous to perfectionism: these are spenders and spendthrifts who tend to destroy (create chaos) and are incapable of construction or creating something new. Another clearly opposite phenomenon (although the source is fundamentally different) is “not giving a damn”, here a person makes nothing at all, no decisions, relying on the beloved “maybe” by many.

From here, from “not giving a fuck,” a thread stretches to procrastination (putting things off), which can become a natural consequence of perfectionism (putting things off due to fear that it won’t be possible to do something perfectly, perfectly).

People without skin

Perfectionists are often very sensitive people. But sensitive individuals are not always perfectionists. They are called people “without skin,” when a rude word or a dismissive look can hurt, and betrayal or separation unsettles them for a long time and becomes a tragedy.

Sensitivity can also be biologically determined when a person is born with a very delicate, receptive nervous system, says Mikhail Khors. But sometimes such a feature speaks of a “god complex.”

“Such a person does not necessarily strive for success, he may not have good grades at school or higher education, he may not have a prestigious job, salary, recognition of colleagues, but at the same time he has a complex of an omnipotent and omniscient being who knows exactly how to it should be, how the world should be. And if it is structured differently than what he imagined, then it is a bad world. It is painful for such people to live in a world that is not structured according to their laws. In religion this is called “pride”. Pride is the sin that is the mother of all other sins.”

Nadezhda Solovyova believes that in this case we are not talking about perfectionism, but rather about intolerance.

“You cannot put an equal sign between intolerance and perfectionism. There are intolerant people who are not perfectionists, and vice versa.”

A psychotherapist will help you cope with the “God complex”. Hypersensitive people can also improve their quality of life through therapy sessions and learn to react less painfully to traumatic situations and events.

What is perfectionism and what are its manifestations in society?

An ideal example of social perfectionism is Yevgeny Zamyatin’s dystopia “We.” A totalitarian state, complete control of activities and life (including sexual contacts), a set daily routine, a strictly limited number of hours for “free” leisure.

Such a society is represented by a clock - a perfectly calibrated mechanism operating on the basis of a perpetual motion machine (watch the video on the Internet). Apparently, this is why society is falling apart - the engine has not been created.