Intrapersonal conflict: what is it in psychology and how to get rid of it - the causes of internal contradictions in an individual

Many people are faced with a situation where the mind requires certain actions, and feelings require others. This condition has both positive and negative consequences. In this article I will tell you all about intrapersonal conflict, I will explain what it is in psychology ,

How does this problem occur? Conflicting desires usually create an atmosphere of a hopeless situation, a vicious circle, a dead end. However, the contradiction can be easily resolved if you do not deny its existence and do not suppress it.

Definition of the concept

Conflict is a difficult to resolve disagreement that forms within an individual. This condition is accompanied by fear and depression. Usually a person denies the existence of a problem or simply does not notice it.

Internal contradiction is also called confrontation. The features of this type of confrontation are:

• a certain structure of conflict (confrontation does not have subjects of interaction, which can be represented either by individuals or by entire groups of people).
• secrecy (it is quite difficult to identify such a disorder, since the individual himself is not aware of the state he is in);
• the specificity of the forms of formation and course (the collision of the two sides is characterized by the presence of experiences and is accompanied by constant phobias, depression and stress).

When a person who adheres to his rules or beliefs suddenly breaks them, he begins to feel an intrapersonal contradiction. This disorder can be extremely distressing. It is not always possible to cope with them.

Religious conflict

Religious conflict is quite common as it revolves around reason-oriented beliefs and beliefs, which makes them especially fragile. Examples of religious conflict include believing in a loving God, but it is difficult to accept that this “loving” being sends people to hell for eternity. Or a person who is religiously faithful uses various drugs. When scientific facts arise, religious conflict may arise in a person who values ​​both truth and his religious beliefs.

Signs of internal conflict

There are several symptoms of this malaise:

• apathy;
• depression;
• isolation;
• low self-esteem and lack of self-confidence;
• anxiety;
• irritability;
• loss of concentration;
• indifference to life.

Symptoms vary, changes depend on the severity of the disease. With mild confrontation, the person tries to distract himself with various activities, for example:

• cleaning;
• arranging books in alphabetical order;
• professional activity.

A severe form of illness is characterized by the following symptoms: loss of strength, apathy. When an individual cannot concentrate on his choice, he is haunted by an obsessive stream of thoughts, anxiety, absent-mindedness, and lack of concentration arise.

What to expect from yourself

When you understand the true reason, perhaps you will be overwhelmed by emotions. Give them free rein, don't hold back the dam. Make sure your emotions find a way out. Either in physical activity, or... just cry.

Image by Enrique Meseguer from Pixabay

As you work, you may discover resentment toward yourself or “that guy.” Then imagine the image of this person and talk to him. Why did this happen and how do you regret it? Ask for forgiveness and listen to his words.

You can use the Inner Child technique. Contact your little inner child and in the process of dialogue you will learn a lot of new things about yourself and your desires. You can draw your conflict and in the process of drawing understand the reasons and ways out of it. When the emotions subside, you can think about coming up with a plan.

What do you really want, what will help you and what obstacles are there and how you can overcome them. And what can you do to change the situation. Maybe specific steps? It may also happen that nothing definite can be done. Then all that remains is to accept everything as it is, forgive yourself for your mistakes and accept the mistakes of others. And from this understanding, continue to make plans and move on with your life.

I don’t know if such statistics exist and how reliable they would be: how many people experience intrapersonal conflict. But I think the answer is on the surface. In the modern world, where there are rules and laws, you have to choose between the demands of society and your internal values.

Or balance like tightrope walker Philippe Petit. When he followed a thin thread, he made the transition from one tower to another at an altitude of 411 meters. Look, this is a conflict between your want, your can and your need.

What creates conflict within a person?

Cognitive dissonance occurs when a person is unable to achieve what he wants. This is prevented not by external obstacles, but by internal circumstances. The psyche determines two ways out of the situation, but neither of them is usually suitable. We are unable to change our desires. A girl cannot easily put down and stop loving a guy she really likes, even if she understands that he is completely unsuitable.

During the period of confrontation, two strong opposing sides arise - from the mind and from emotions, they have equal strength, so the intrapersonal battle lasts for quite a long time and because of this the individual cannot live a normal, familiar life.

Self-esteem conflict

Your image is your internal idea of ​​yourself, for example, “My name is Ivan. I am a patient, loving and compassionate person. I'm a disorganized artist who supports animal rights, etc." Internal conflict occurs when we are confronted with evidence that contradicts our beliefs about ourselves. For example, a person who believes he is honest may lie on his resume to get his dream job. Someone who is for a healthy diet cannot give up smoking. A person who identifies as an empath may experience constant resentment towards another person.

Causes of internal conflict

To determine the origins of this psychological problem, it is necessary to return to childhood. In most cases, parents impose attitudes on us, which subsequently become irrelevant. If, as an adult, a person goes against these beliefs, he stumbles upon conflict within himself.

One of the frequent reasons for the formation of contradictions is religious attitudes. A person who has sinned must immediately repent of his actions. For example, a believer understands perfectly well that sinning is bad, but the forbidden fruit is sweet, he feels temptation, and here a psychological confrontation between two sides develops - desires and reason.

Psychologist Daria Milai

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There are three types of reasons for the formation of conflict:

• depending on the contradictions of the individual;
• related to status in society;
• depend on the position of the individual in a certain group of people.

The first type is characterized by the following manifestations of confrontation:

• choice between social norms and individual needs;
• prioritization of social roles (you are not able to do two things at the same time and concentrate on them equally);
• confrontation of moral principles (going to war to be brave and protect your family, but killing is bad).

For an individual there are only two choices - to do what he wants or to refuse it. If the first or second is more important to him, there will be no confrontation. But if these two decisions are equally significant for him, a confrontation appears.

Next, I will talk about the cognitive dissonance that develops within a person due to his status in a certain group:

• obstacles set by other people that prevent you from satisfying your own desires;
• problems at the biological level, they prevent you from realizing your potential;
• limited rights and fear of taking responsibility for one’s actions;
• opposition between professional activities, interests, norms and values;
• conflict due to the desire to earn money and not violate morality.

I told you everything about the concept of internal conflict, explained what it is and how it affects personality psychology. If you want to solve the problem as soon as possible and get rid of this condition forever, sign up for my consultation.

I will give a few more reasons why conflict arises.

Resistance

It occurs when a person is aware of exactly what he wants or needs, but subconsciously holds himself back from satisfying the needs and desires. He resists because he believes that all his attempts at pleasure will lead to vulnerability. There can be a large number of reasons for this: lack of self-confidence, fears, old attitudes, a feeling of shame. This state appears when our thoughts and actions coincide, but not completely.

Psychological Beliefs

Each person has his own rules that he does not break. Sometimes they are obstacles to achieving desired goals. Often such attitudes are laid down in early childhood by family or friends. The individual is convinced that violating them will lead to a loss of security.

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Peer review task

You have just learned about the types of intrapersonal conflict and its characteristics. Now we propose to apply the acquired knowledge in practice.

Just below you will find a video that presents three examples of intrapersonal conflict. Your task is to watch this video and give a brief description of each example, based on the information you just learned.

This is a peer review assignment, so you will need to check 2 other people's work first and then upload yours. When checking other people's work, you need to evaluate how correctly, in your opinion, the type of conflict is defined and how deeply the analysis is carried out.

Statistics Full screen

Most likely, you were able to identify relatively accurately what types of internal conflict are presented in the video. However, another important feature of intrapersonal conflict is that it can be characterized by both positive and negative consequences, i.e. the conflict itself can be constructive or destructive.

Classification of internal personal conflict

I identify the following types of conflict malaise:

• equivalent;
• vital;
• ambivalent;
• frustrating.

Equivalent

It develops when two or more important tasks need to be completed. To resolve this situation, it is necessary to resort to a compromise.

Vital

It appears when an individual has to accept solutions to a problem that are unattractive to him. This is where depression and depression arise.

Ambivalent

It develops when desire simultaneously attracts and repels.

Frustrating

It arises when needs contradict public opinion, accepted norms and beliefs, thereby preventing the achievement of what is desired.

How to achieve peace of mind?

1. The most important step is releasing beliefs and expectations. It is important to understand where your thoughts come from and are they yours? Do you control them or do they control you? Remember that only you decide how to react and what to think about a given situation.
2. It’s also important to figure out and prioritize. You must have a clear idea of ​​what you value, at this moment, most.
3. Think about what you fear most, because once you realize your most important fears, you will have clarity and direction on where to move next and what to work on.
4. At the next imbalance, imagine that a gun was pointed at your head, what decision would you make?
5. A useful and most obvious guide is a list of pros and cons. Write down each option in detail and you will easily understand what to choose.

Types of intrapersonal conflict

Now I will give several more types of psychological illness, which differ depending on the place of origin. However, the general features of all these types are similar to each other.

Moral

This is the most common type of contradiction, which develops due to moral principles and the desire to violate them. For example, a man sitting in a subway car understands that he must give up his seat to an elderly person, but he is so tired from work that he cannot overcome his fatigue and get up. The whole trip he is tormented by confrontation: his mind insists on his selfish behavior, and fatigue does not allow him to do the right thing.

Sexual

It is formed mainly in people prone to embarrassment and shame. For example: a man wants to diversify his intimate life with his wife, but he does not dare to do so, because he is afraid of a negative reaction and of being a pervert in the eyes of his wife. He is ashamed to tell his other half about his desires because of shyness. Because of this, cognitive dissonance appears, which leads to satisfaction of sexual needs on the side, and then divorce.

Religious

Faith is a powerful tool that helps to distinguish evil from good and to commit unscrupulous acts. But all the covenants are difficult to follow; even people who have formed strong religious beliefs often face temptations and seductions, provoking their confrontation with morality.

For example, a religious teenager experiences passionate sympathy for a girl, he begins to produce hormones, this pushes him to romantic actions and passion. However, he realizes that these actions will lead to sin and are contrary to his beliefs and rules.

Political

Internal conflict is a mental disorder that also occurs in people who fight for territory and to defend people's interests. Such individuals experience constant fear, because they have to risk their lives to defend their beliefs.

Love

Constant confrontation between mind and heart is typical for lovers. They form the habit of constantly spending time together, which does not allow them to break off the relationship. Each partner experiences breakups in their own way, some become the initiators of the breakup, others realize its inevitability. But even full awareness of what is happening pushes a person to various stupid actions: alcohol, harassment, calls, finding out the reasons.

Cognitive dissonance due to self-esteem

Often people experience self-doubt due to certain complexes and shortcomings. For example: excess weight, excessive thinness, birthmarks. Often, due to low self-esteem, a person tries to change himself, and this does not always work. She cannot come to terms with her shortcomings and love herself, this gives rise to contradictions. Devastation also occurs from a bad haircut, excess weight after pregnancy, or an accident in which one’s appearance was damaged.

Social

It comes from a relationship with one specific person or with a specific group of people. In most cases, teenagers face such a conflict and become outcasts in the classroom. Every day they have to fight judgment. Often this gives rise to internal complexes, the child begins to doubt himself and his strengths, and experiences loneliness.

Existential

This is the most complex and severe form of conflict. It mainly appears among maximalists. People in this category cannot understand their purpose. They constantly question the relevance of their lives. Also, confrontation is formed if an individual loses the meaning of existence and the ability to express himself.

This condition often manifests itself in adolescents in adolescence, as well as in a person who is experiencing a crisis at 30 years old. This disorder is accompanied by drastic changes: work, style, image, divorce, infidelity.

Prevention of intrapersonal conflicts

Our life is structured in such a way that there is always a high probability of circumstances arising that can lead to the destruction of the harmonious process of development and a negative impact on the inner world. And it’s very bad if we are not prepared for such situations. Every effort must be made to avoid the development of destructive intrapersonal conflicts, and if they appear, then resolve them as quickly as possible. Having information about how and why internal conflicts arise, it is possible to determine the conditions necessary to prevent them.

To prevent the occurrence of intrapersonal conflict, you need to follow the following recommendations in your life :

✔	In order to maintain the integrity of his inner world, a person must learn, first of all, to perceive life’s difficulties as an integral part of his life, because This approach can encourage him to work on himself and activate his creative potential.
✔	It is also of great importance for a person to form his life principles and follow them in all actions and deeds. Life principles can protect a person from many situations associated with the emergence of intrapersonal conflicts.
✔	Often, established principles of life reflect a certain ossification of a person, an inability to be flexible, which can also become a cause of internal conflict. And if a person is able to change his usual way of being (in the event that it is untenable or ineffective), then this will be another great way to avoid conflict with himself. Life often requires us to be alert, adaptive, flexible, able to adapt to any situation. In cases where you need to lower your claims and give in on small things, this should be done. However, this should not become a system, because lack of stability also leads to conflict within the individual.
✔	You should always hope for a positive outcome of events. Optimism, supported by internal aspirations and work on oneself, will be the key to a positive attitude towards life and mental health.
✔	It is necessary to stop indulging your weaknesses, to adequately assess your potential and your capabilities to realize your own needs and desires.
✔	It is important to learn to control your manifestations and your psyche. Moreover, to a greater extent this skill should be attributed to managing one’s emotional states.
✔	The prevention of intrapersonal conflicts is greatly facilitated by the development of volitional qualities and skills, because It is the will that is a reflection of self-regulation and presupposes the ability to make the right decisions.
✔	We need to learn to correctly structure the hierarchy of roles performed for ourselves, because the desire to realize the maximum of functions arising from each role, as well as to meet the expectations of those around us, will certainly become the cause of internal conflict.
✔	In many ways, the prevention of internal conflicts is facilitated by the development of a sufficient level of personal maturity of a person. Here it is assumed that one goes beyond the boundaries of purely role behavior, and rejects stereotyped reactions, and strictly adheres to the decisions made. It is also important not just to blindly conform to generally accepted moral standards, but also to strive for individual moral creativity.
✔	Adequate self-esteem is also an important condition. High or low self-esteem may be due to the fact that a person cannot or is afraid to honestly admit something to himself, as well as to the fact that he strives for others to perceive him in a certain way, even if he himself perceives himself according to reality state of affairs.

If we try to bring the methods of preventing intrapersonal conflict to a single algorithm, then it can be briefly reflected as follows:

• Focus on your highest priority motives and needs. First of all, implement them and do not try to embrace the immensity;
• Don't accumulate your problems and difficulties. Solve problems as they arise, preventing their accumulation, without waiting for the moment when it becomes very difficult to “understand yourself”;
• Work on yourself, learn to control your emotions, states and manifestations. Correct your behavior and learn to pull yourself together;
• Pay attention to how others react to you and your actions, and also evaluate their behavior yourself. This can be a pointer to working on yourself;
• Be sincere with yourself and with other people. Don't lie to yourself and don't live in illusions;
• Strive for a healthy lifestyle and thoughts, make yourself stronger physically, psychologically, emotionally, spiritually.

These are recommendations for preventing intrapersonal conflicts. Doing them regularly and on time can serve you well and save you from unnecessary problems. However, there is, of course, no 100% guarantee that internal conflict will not arise. And if it appears, you need to be able to influence it correctly.

Resolving psychological problems with Daria Milai

Intrapersonal experiences are a conflict between emotions and reason; resolving this confrontation is not so easy. Personality is formed before the age of five, at this stage the child develops complexes that affect internal psychological disorders. To get rid of them, sign up for my consultation, I will help you:

• effectively build interpersonal relationships;
• deal with shortcomings and insecurities;
• get rid of fears and depression;
• prevent the presence of alcohol and drugs in your life;
• develop your own potential.

What is intrapersonal conflict?

Intrapersonal conflict is an aggravated negative experience caused by a protracted confrontation between various structures of a person’s inner world, reflecting his contradictory connections with the outside world and preventing decision-making. Also, intrapersonal conflict is characterized by the fact that it overcomes any person, and overcomes him systematically.

Intrapersonal conflict can be either constructive or destructive. In the first case, it is an integral part of personal development, and in the second, it represents a danger to a person, because causes stress and difficult experiences, and in some cases even suicide. It is for this reason that any person should know what intrapersonal conflict is, how to define it, and also be able to resolve it.

To recognize intrapersonal conflict, it is necessary to learn to identify its main indicators (symptoms), which can manifest themselves in various areas of personal manifestation.

Ways to deal with conflict

In order to permanently resolve psychological contradictions, it is necessary to approach this problem with all seriousness, make every effort and fully concentrate on it. Recovery takes place in five stages:

1. It is worth recognizing the presence of a disorder; acceptance is an important stage of the struggle.
2. It is necessary to conduct a deep analysis and identify all the reasons. Break everything down point by point.
3. It is necessary to work through every problem that has become a source of development of confrontation. A person must make the right decision and decide on the choice of option: act by listening to reason or feelings. It is extremely difficult to choose on your own; you should contact a professional psychologist.
4. Deal with anxious thoughts, free your head from negative thinking, and allow positivity to enter your brain.
5. Work on your attitudes.

Take care of your nervous system, all problems disappear over time and become unimportant.

Let's watch a movie

Now let's watch a movie. For example, the film "Pretty Woman". And here is a vivid example of how the main character Vivien is torn apart by intrapersonal conflicts. Both role and moral. The requirements of the role of a woman of easy virtue clearly contradict the requirements of the role of a good friend and a decent person. She is also doomed to endure moral conflict. When all fundamental values ​​are in dispute.

And here is “Joker”. This psychological thriller also has a hero overwhelmed by intrapersonal conflicts. And in general, mind you, the film that you were interested in watching clearly featured a hero who was in conflict with himself or society. We are fascinated by watching ambiguous events, the emotional swings of the heroes and their minute-by-minute choices on the verge of a foul.

Giphy

It seems that even the fairy tale “Kolobok” can be divided into subtypes of intrapersonal conflicts. Which one way or another would have touched the round, appetizing hero if he had not been such an optimist.

“Sit on my toe and sing one more time!” That's what the little fox used to say. And, oh, how difficult it would be for the bun to decide to jump on its cunning nose. In general, just like leaving your grandparents. If only he had a little more experience. The details are in the tale, but only we know that his “am!” and ate it.

What else can you read to observe the intrapersonal conflicts of the characters, empathizing with them? Almost any work of classics. There are plenty of examples in fiction. After all, often an exciting plot unfolds against the backdrop of the hero’s intrapersonal conflict.

What can you do if contradictions are your other self? Try to bring the intrapersonal conflict to the surface. That is, assess the situation and think about what exactly causes you irritation or fear. Analyze why this conflict arose. There is nothing to hide from yourself, even unpleasant things, be honest with yourself.

Consequences of mental disorder

A conflicting state can bring both a positive and negative outcome. It depends on how a person recovers and copes with this ailment.

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Positive consequences occur when the individual does not run away from the problem and does not deny its existence. In the process of healing, he gets to know himself, analyzes the reasons for the formation of confrontation. Sometimes he manages to satisfy two needs at once. If a person has successfully passed this difficult stage of life, it means that she has improved herself and become psychologically more stable and stronger.

Negative consequences are depression, crises, depression, and the development of mental illness.

You cannot run away from yourself, so you need to make every effort to resolve cognitive dissonance and live a normal life with a healthy psyche.

Constructive intrapersonal conflict

Constructive, i.e. An optimal or productive intrapersonal conflict is a conflict in which the development of the conflicting parties occurs, and the personal costs of resolving it are minimal. Such a conflict is a mechanism for harmonizing personality, because in the process of resolving it, a person realizes himself as an individual.

One of the characteristics of personality is that it correlates with each other certain life relationships, which give rise to internal struggle. In some cases, this struggle can occur in forms that do not appear outwardly and do not have a destructive effect on a person’s personality. If a person is harmonious, this does not mean that he is not subject to internal struggle. Moreover, this struggle can become the basis of a person’s entire appearance.

Constructive internal conflict can strengthen character, form determination and psychological stability, independence; is able to establish a clear direction for the individual, create new character traits, promote adequate self-esteem, personal growth and self-knowledge.

EXAMPLE: Fighting bad habits; development of willpower; working on yourself, despite reluctance and laziness; the ability to put one’s own desires in the background for the sake of the good of another person or even one’s own, etc.

What is the danger

The longer you suffer from conformity, the worse the consequences. I will list the main problems that arise when you neglect your psychological state:

• constant depression;
• suicidal tendencies;
• neurosis;
• loss of interest in hobbies;
• reluctance to communicate with loved ones;
• degradation;
• the emergence of an inferiority complex;
• decreased self-esteem.

Individuals who have been unable to resolve conflicts for years often begin to behave aggressively or, on the contrary, become indifferent, pliable, and refuse to take responsibility and make decisions for others.

There are also disagreements that occur hidden; people live with them for years and do not notice them and do not pay attention to them. But sooner or later, even unnoticed symptoms manifest themselves and lead to serious consequences. Be attentive to your health, both physical and psychological, and do not be afraid to visit psychologists. This will make it easier for you to get through this difficult period.

Resolution of intrapersonal conflicts

Resolution of intrapersonal conflicts is a process of restoring the coherence of a person’s inner world, harmonizing his consciousness, reducing the intensity of contradictory life attitudes and achieving a new quality of being. It helps a person achieve peace of mind, a deeper understanding of life, and form new values.

The resolution of intrapersonal conflict is realized by neutralizing painful conditions associated with the conflict, reducing the socio-psychological and psychological factors of the conflict, increasing productivity, etc.

Depending on the individual characteristics of a person, he can perceive his internal contradictions in different ways, as well as choose the most appropriate behavioral strategies for him. One person may be lost in thought, another will immediately begin to take active action, and a third will succumb to emotions. There is no one correct attitude towards intrapersonal conflict. It is important here that each person is able to be aware of his own personal characteristics, and, based on this, determine the style of resolving his internal contradictions.

Simply put, this is what the resolution of intrapersonal conflict depends on:

1	Worldviews of a person.
2	A person’s ability to overcome himself and his experience in this area.
3	Volitional qualities.
4	A person’s temperament has a greater influence on dynamic indicators, such as the speed and stability of experiences, the rhythm in which they occur. Directionality, intensity, etc.
5	Sex and age characteristics.

Resolution of intrapersonal conflict is achieved by activating psychological defense mechanisms, which are necessary to control emotions, internal states and external manifestations.

What should you resort to if you need to resolve an intrapersonal conflict:

• Assess the situation and try to take control of it. Identify your internal contradictions and realize what led you to negative feelings;
• Conduct an in-depth analysis of the situation. Determine how important the conflict is to you, what role you play in it, and what role it plays in your life. Predict the possible consequences of the conflict;
• Determine the exact cause of the conflict, localize the “hotbed”. Strive to identify the essence of the problem, throwing everything secondary into the background;
• Be honest with yourself: don’t give yourself any concessions, don’t put off the decision until later. Analyze the conflict again and try to understand what it is telling you: what you need to change in yourself, what actions to take, why the problem affects you so much;
• Sublimate negative emotions into activities: you can do physical exercise or immerse yourself in creativity; watch a good movie or read an interesting book;
• Use relaxation techniques. Currently, there are many effective ways to relax, from meditation to psychological training;
• If the internal conflict is related to your activity, try to change something in it: change the conditions, bring something new to your work; you can even change your occupation altogether;
• Adjust the level of your aspirations: compare your desires and needs with your capabilities; Look honestly at yourself - what are you capable of and what are you not?
• Learn to forgive. Moreover, it is important to be able to forgive not only others, but also yourself: not engage in self-criticism, self-reproach, self-flagellation, etc.
• If you feel really bad, go away and cry. There's nothing wrong with that. In addition, even scientific research (in particular, research by the American biochemist William Frey) has shown that tears contain a special substance that has the property of calming, and if you want to cry, then the brain needs a discharge.

And lastly: learn to accept yourself as you are, and your life as a given, with all the successes and failures, ups and downs, white and black stripes. We will always face difficulties and troubles, feel pressure and stress, achieve success, win victories and suffer defeats - all this is what we call our life. We need to learn to get along with ourselves, the people with whom we interact and the reality around us. Harmony and proper balance are the basis of happiness, success, prosperity and health in all its manifestations.

We, in turn, sincerely hope that our conflict management training will be useful for you and will make you and your life, at least a little, better. Study, strive for knowledge and remember that no theory can replace practice. Therefore, take into account the information received - and good luck!