Self-knowledge: stages, essence and the very goal for a person

Self-knowledge in a person’s life begins almost from birth. This process is quite complex in its structure. It is present in every age period of a person, but the degree of its severity varies. Self-knowledge most often intensifies during adolescence and youth. But in old age it declines, but there are exceptions.

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Results of self-knowledge and the process of self-knowledge

In the course of self-knowledge, a person gets to know himself. This knowledge can be divided into groups. For example, emotions, character traits, behavioral characteristics, intellectual properties. They are also called constructs. They form a self-image, on the basis of which the self-concept is formed.

If we highlight the general results of self-knowledge, then this is a sense of personal competence. What does it consist of? The first is the feeling that we are all similar, i.e. identical. And the second is that we accept ourselves entirely and completely, with pros and cons, positive and negative qualities. A person does not resist himself, while he has a desire to grow, develop and change something in himself, but this happens gradually.

As feelings of identity and self-acceptance emerge, self-esteem emerges. This feeling expresses the degree of sympathy a person has for himself.

And, identity, self-esteem and self-acceptance contribute to a sense of self-competence. How does it manifest itself? In the fact that a person accepts himself, his characteristics, he can make important decisions himself and determine his destiny.

Self-awareness - what is it?

Personal self-awareness is closely related to deep knowledge of oneself and understanding of the processes that occur in the mental sphere and in the body. The concept of self-awareness also includes awareness - the ability to understand the causes and consequences of occurring events.

Self-awareness is a multi-component concept. It includes:

• self-esteem;
• understanding one's own value;
• self-esteem;
• the ability to help oneself;
• tendency to introspection;
• self-realization.

Self-awareness is based on a deep understanding of oneself, acceptance of one’s strengths and weaknesses, and awareness of one’s own uniqueness. The presence of all these characteristics allows a person to develop personally, set goals and achieve his plans.

Personal self-awareness in different human sciences is interpreted very similarly. Social science explains self-awareness as a person's deep understanding of his own motives, thoughts, actions, as well as his place in society. This interpretation places emphasis on the ability to independently make decisions and be responsible for their consequences.

A philosophical view of self-awareness reveals it as an individual’s understanding of his knowledge, moral principles and motives for each action performed. In this interpretation, self-awareness is a property inherent in a deeply feeling and critically thinking person.

The process of self-discovery

The process of self-knowledge is a complete awareness of oneself, character, and essence. By the way, it is self-knowledge that distinguishes a person from other inhabitants of our planet, for example, animals. In all beliefs and religious movements, self-knowledge is defined as a means of recognizing and understanding one’s community with God. This is especially evident in Eastern religions.

It is quite simple and clear that a person determines his life path. Chooses between several options, sets a goal, performs actions, interacts with others. Thanks to this, he begins to be an interesting person, both to those around him, and he begins to enjoy spending time with himself.

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Ways of self-knowledge

• Self-observation is considered the beginning of the entire process of self-knowledge. During it, a person observes himself. Using this method, a person increases his awareness. Here you must focus on what is happening inside you, on what feelings you are experiencing.
• Introspection. When you analyze yourself, you look at your behavior and reactions. You are trying to understand why you did what you did and nothing else. Psychologically, self-analysis is considered the most difficult.
• Comparison. Here a person, willy-nilly, compares himself with others. This is their nature. As a result of comparisons, a person gets to know himself better.
• Self-acceptance. Here a person accepts himself completely and without reserve. He is aware of his strengths and weaknesses and is ready to improve himself.

To become aware of yourself, watch!

“Watch every action you perform, every thought that passes through your mind, every desire that comes over you. Watch how you walk, talk, eat, take a bath. Let everything become an opportunity to observe!” — OSHO

Conscious personality formation begins with this simple skill. For example, control over negative thoughts, anger, irritation. As soon as they appear, try to honestly answer yourself what or who is causing them. Try to monitor your automatic reactions to different situations.

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Types of self-knowledge

There are several types of self-knowledge. Among them:

• Analytical – has a connection with the activities of our mind;
• Creative – connected with our feelings;
• Spiritual – associated with our religion, faith.

There are also indirect self-knowledge (when a person analyzes his own behavior) and direct self-knowledge (self-observation).

Analytical self-knowledge

Analytical self-knowledge occurs as a result of knowing oneself and observing oneself. A written analysis during self-observation helps to get to know yourself better. For example, keeping personal diaries. Another way is self-confession. In this case, you need to tell yourself about yourself. Sometimes this can be quite difficult, because defense mechanisms come into play. A psychologist can help here. But reflection is different from confession, because you will simply observe the process, without any assessment of yourself.

Human creative self-knowledge

Such self-knowledge allows you to get to know yourself better through games, going to the theater, general activities and social events. For example, playing in the theater. It has a positive effect on the psyche because internal resistance disappears. After all, this is a game, and the person there is an actor. This is where deep self-knowledge occurs.

Spiritual self-discovery

In this type of self-knowledge, a person chooses a certain method of spiritual self-knowledge. This could be yoga or spiritual practices. And using this method he begins to get to know himself, to analyze his own actions.

How to meditate

Designate a Meditation Place

Whether you're sitting on a chair, meditation cushion, park bench, or against a wall, choose a spot that's comfortable for you and doesn't allow you to lay down or sag.

Pay attention to your feet

If you are sitting on a cushion on the floor, cross your legs in front of you. If you decide to meditate in a chair, make sure your feet touch the floor.

Align your upper body

When trying to straighten your back, do not try to overextend it, because the spine has a natural curvature. Allow your back to remain in a natural position. Your head and shoulders should feel comfortable sitting at the top of your vertebrae.

Place your hands at the base of your feet

At the same time, place one palm on top of the other.

Lower your chin slightly

As a result, your gaze will also be directed slightly downwards behind your chin. It is not necessary to close your eyes, but if you feel more comfortable meditating with your eyes closed, you can close them. As you gain experience, you will most likely begin to close your eyes.

Relaxation of the body and concentration of attention

Scan your body with your attention and relax all areas of it. Focus on your belly and continue to monitor your breathing. Watch your belly rise and fall.

Don't try to take in too much air, let your body do everything naturally, because all that is required of you is conscious contemplation. As a result, subtle breathing will become familiar to you.

Your attention will inevitably be diverted from focusing on your breathing. Don't worry or judge yourself, but simply return your attention to the right point. Attention runs away - attention returns.

During meditation, do not try to achieve any goal. Practice meditation for meditation's sake.

At first you can meditate for 5 minutes, after which you yourself will feel the need to increase the duration of meditation.

Stages of self-knowledge

A person gets to know himself throughout his life. At each age stage, corresponding stages of self-knowledge occur.

1. Self-recognition

Self-recognition is the initial stage of knowing yourself. It begins almost from the moment of birth. The child understands that he lives as a separate person. Look in the mirror, he recognizes himself.

1. Self-concept

Self-concept is a person’s very stable understanding of himself and his characteristics. This concept is formed in the process of various life events.

1. Self-esteem

Self-esteem determines how significant a person is to himself, how important his activities are, recognizing all the pros and cons. Here, the achievements of the person himself and his assessment by the people around him occupy a significant position.

Values ​​in self-knowledge through yoga practice

Thanks to yoga and various spiritual practices, people can understand their inner world and become more aware of themselves. In yoga there are several steps that you need to go through. Thus, a whole list is formed, thanks to which a person has his values ​​in order; a special place there is occupied by spiritual values, to which he strives throughout his life.

Need for self-knowledge

People often ask questions about the meaning of life and true values. How can a person understand himself and those around him? Such questions are the basis for the need for oneself. This need is inherent in every person. People are in an eternal search for the meaning of life; it comes first for them. After all, until we understand the meaning of life, we will not learn to understand ourselves.

Inner peace and self-knowledge

Where is the meaning of life? It is logical that it is inside us, not outside. When we understand this, our lives begin to change. From here appear monks who sell their Mercedes and say goodbye to their past life. It's not that simple here. Such people choose the path of spirituality, not because they feel like it right now, but in a week they will return back to their normal life. Here we are talking about the fact that they follow the path of spirituality throughout their lives.

Personal growth as a stage of self-knowledge

As a person develops, his or her level of self-knowledge increases. For example, at the beginning the child learns to distinguish himself from other people. Further, as he grows up, he develops beliefs about himself. And then he finds motivation that encourages him to improve his life and develop.

Mindfulness

The first step in mindfulness is to become very aware of your body. Little by little one becomes alert in every gesture, in every movement.

Osho [Chandra Mohan Jain]

The human mind is designed in an amazing way; it can be in different states and in each of them show us a completely unique picture of the world. Here, in particular, our mind can be in a state of reflection, when many different thoughts flow through our head, in the form of some ideas, images, concepts with the help of which we study something, invent something, remember something, we dream about something. He can also be in a state of trance, when most of our thoughts are not conscious of us and we are in a half-asleep state. And our mind can also be in a state of rest, when there are practically no thoughts in it. In the latter case, we are talking about the state of awareness, which we will talk about in this article. I will tell you what this state feels like, how to achieve it, and how we can benefit from our awareness.

What is mindfulness

Mindfulness is the ability of a person to live the present moment without any thoughts about it. In a state of mindfulness, a person’s entire attention is focused on the current moment, he is not distracted by thoughts about the past or future, because they simply do not exist, his mind without judgment perceives everything that happens right here and now. In this state, we are able to perceive reality without any distortion, thanks to the absence of any thoughts in our head. Also, from a psychological point of view, mindfulness can be called a person’s constant monitoring of his current experiences. In general, this is a state of peace of mind, when there are practically no thoughts in our head and all our attention is focused on the present time, on the current processes occurring both inside and around us.

Being in a state of awareness, as practice shows, is very difficult. This is not a state of mind, it is completely unusual for us. In order to remain in such a state, and especially for a long time, you need to not think about anything at all, which is quite difficult to achieve, since our brain is constantly generating some kind of thoughts. We are influenced by our memories that take us back to the past, dreams that drive us into the future, we constantly analyze everything we see, hear, feel around us, therefore, calming our mind and making it not think is such a task that You can’t decide in one evening. It is difficult for a person to concentrate on what is happening to him here and now, it is difficult for him to even track his own state, not to mention being sufficiently attentive to everything that is happening around him at the moment without thinking about it . Therefore, not many people come to awareness, and then only after long and hard training. But let's think about why we need this at all, why we need awareness, what it can give us. And only then we’ll talk about how to get there.

Why is awareness needed?

The main thing that a state of awareness gives us is a feeling of peace, calm, harmony and bliss. Through mindfulness, a person can enjoy all that he already has in his life, without worrying about what he does not yet have. People feel anxiety, dissatisfaction, and other negative feelings always because they are rummaging about their past or imagining a bad future that scares them. There is rarely anything in the present moment that can alarm us. Unless some kind of danger and pain that exists in the present time can occupy our attention, because it happens here and now. But even a real threat to life or real pain that we observe in the present moment cannot give us such anxiety as thoughts about this threat or pain. Simply because without thinking about something we are generally unable to evaluate the phenomena happening around us and with us, we simply observe them. And in this state there is absolutely nothing to worry about.

Whatever happens to you at the moment, without thinking about where it will lead you, you will not worry about it. This may not be entirely correct, because in order for a person to survive and live effectively, he needs, of course, to analyze current events with the help of his experience, knowledge, he needs to predict events, plan his actions, in general, think. But if you want just such calmness, relaxation, deep experience of current events, then you need to give up all these useful functions of the brain. You need to become just an observer, as if you were watching a movie of your life with yourself in the leading role, but at the same time you would not take any part in it. This way a person gets rid of all disturbing thoughts and feelings. He just lives.

Also, thanks to awareness, we can come to understand the harmony of this world, which is very well organized, despite its imperfections. And this, in turn, allows us to accept much of what happens in it, realizing that all this is necessary. And all attempts to change something in this life are vanity of vanities. Such bustle gives us a certain benefit, we develop our civilization, make our life more comfortable, safer, more interesting, and extend it as much as possible. We have learned to treat various diseases, we were able to subordinate some of the laws of nature to our interests, we love to change and are changing this world, making it better for ourselves. This is the result of the work of our mind. And awareness teaches you to live in harmony with what already exists, whether created by nature or people. In this state, a person understands that it is not so important how this world will exist, how you will live in it, what events will happen in it, what, in particular, will happen to you sooner or later. Everything will still come to what it should come to. There is only one ending. Therefore, you can fuss, or you don’t have to, you can just live without worrying about anything. Awareness gives us the opportunity to enjoy life, thanks to it we can live every moment, every situation, every moment totally, without wandering in the jungle of our thoughts and without evaluating anything. We can be completely satisfied with what we have because we simply won't think about what we don't have. Mindfulness frees us from all thoughts, both bad and good, and everything we live in the present moment simply becomes our experience, which is pleasant in itself simply because it is.

Understanding something completely is an important consequence of mindfulness. To fully understand something means to study something in detail, and to do this you need to concentrate as much as possible on this something, which is impossible to do if you are constantly distracted by some external stimuli and your own thoughts. And only in a state of such high, one might say, absolute concentration, which awareness gives a person, can he delve into the subject or process he is studying in utmost detail, primarily through observation of it. In the same psychology, awareness helps to solve many psychological problems, thanks to a person’s complete understanding of everything that happens to him. True, it is believed that not all problems can be gotten rid of in this way; awareness of a problem is not always able to solve it. But here, after all, we can’t always talk about full awareness; a person can only think that he has realized his problem, understood the reason for its occurrence, and saw the meaning of the discomfort he experiences, which it creates for him. But in fact, this may be only a partial understanding of it, and therefore not awareness as such. But let's not dwell on this. The main thing for us is to understand that awareness of something is a complete, one might say, perfect understanding of what we are aware of. And such an understanding of something gives us the opportunity to control this something. For example, we can manage our emotional state, we can control many processes in our life, not allowing them to create any surprises for us. Complete clarity of something that our awareness extends to gives us a certain power over that something. Even if we cannot somehow influence the things we are aware of, we can at least adapt to them in the necessary way. For example, we can adjust to the fundamental laws of life to make our lives harmonious and predictable.

In my work, mindfulness plays a key role. Any work with people comes down to finding something new and important for them, something they need to understand in order to understand themselves and their situation. And so the main thing I strive to achieve in working with people on their problems is that they fully understand what is happening to them and why. There should be no mysteries; a person needs to clearly understand the whole logic of his problem, all the patterns that underlie it. Then he will be able to take the necessary and feasible actions to solve it. But such clarity is not easy to come by. I often hear from people that they are aware of what is happening to them. For example, a person says that he is aware of his fear, namely, that he is aware of its meaninglessness, but he cannot do anything about it, he still experiences this fear. But that doesn't happen. If you realize the meaninglessness of fear, then you cannot experience it. And if you experience it, it means you don’t realize it. In a state of awareness, there is no place for illogical thoughts that cause a feeling of fear, if there is no threat to the person. And if the threat is real, then the person is simply looking for the right solution to neutralize it. Awareness leads to understanding, and understanding leads to a solution to a problem. Therefore, people make the mistake of thinking that they are aware of their problems, especially imaginary problems, which they cannot solve. There may be some understanding of the cause of the problem, but not awareness of it. Otherwise, the real problem would turn into a problem that has a solution algorithm that you just need to use, and the fictitious problem would completely dissolve.

Quality work done is, I believe, also a useful consequence of awareness. In such a state, a person is able to concentrate so strongly on what he is doing that no thoughts will cause him to make a mistake, not take something into account, or forget to do something, which is why errors appear in his work. Working in a state of awareness is the same as meditating, all the resources of the mind are subject to one process, all attention is directed to one thing, nothing distracts the person, even if there is something distracting around, some irritants. After all, people make many mistakes not so much out of ignorance as out of inattention. And mindfulness helps a person to direct all his attention, all the resources of his brain to something that he considers important for himself at the moment. Therefore, the work that a person does completely consciously produces excellent results.

Perfect memorization of any information that a person is fully aware of is also a big advantage of awareness. The ability to enter such a state while studying allows a person to significantly improve the quality of his or her learning. Well, just imagine what it means for a person to remember something the first time, and very, very well, in all details. This is just a great opportunity to learn something new in the shortest possible time. Usually, memory is selective, it stores only what is important to us, and awareness allows us to make important everything that a person accepts from the outside world while in such a state. In general, there is an opinion, and I share it, according to which a person remembers absolutely everything that he learns during his life, only some part of the information received consciously is stored in quickly accessible memory, and some is hidden deep in the subconscious and from there It can be very difficult to extract it, sometimes completely impossible. Sometimes hypnosis helps to do this, sometimes there are some critical situations in which a person’s memory uses all its resources, extracting any information from the depths of the subconscious to help him cope with the difficulties that have arisen. But it is impossible to do this so that, at will, a person takes and remembers something that penetrated into him bypassing his attention.

Therefore, in order to remember something well, that is, in such a way as to be able to retrieve the necessary information from memory at any time, you need to pass it through your consciousness, that is, concentrating all the resources of your brain on it so that it is well understood. Then it will no longer be forgotten, at least so much that it cannot be used after some time. That is why, quality learning implies that a person learns something with full awareness of what kind of knowledge he is receiving. You cannot learn, for example, a foreign language by simply turning on an audio recording with lessons and falling asleep, in the hope that the subconscious mind will do everything, accept the information, and process it in the right way so that it can be used later. The experience of people who have tried to learn something this way shows that this method does not give results. So, lazy people have nothing to count on here. Information, of course, will most likely still be stored in the subconscious in this way, but in what form it will be there and how it can then be retrieved from there at will, at any convenient time, this is unknown to us.

Hypnosis, critical situations, diligent memories, these are all not very reliable methods. Therefore, you need to study consciously, concentrating your attention on the subject being studied and thinking about the information received. Then the person will understand it and remember it well. Because his brain will see that this information is important for a person, since he is trying so hard to remember it, paying so much attention to it. Then he, the brain, will not remove it too far, into the depths of the subconscious, but will leave it on the surface in an easily accessible form. Well, now let's talk about how to come to awareness.

How to come to awareness

The first thing that quite rightly comes to mind in this case is meditation. But this is not always the kind of meditation that people most often imagine, when you need to sit in the lotus position and concentrate on internal processes, say, on breathing, getting rid of all other thoughts until there is silence in your head. This, let’s say, classic approach to achieving a state of awareness, although considered quite effective, is not always the best option for a particular person. This option doesn’t suit me, because I’m always doing something and I need meditation in the process of some activity, and not as a separate process. Let’s say, if I’m doing some work, then I need to achieve a state in the process of doing it in which I will be completely focused on it, so that nothing distracts me and all my attention is directed to the process I’m busy with. Why should I sit in certain positions and concentrate on internal processes. I need to concentrate on just one external process, merge with my activity, forgetting about everything else, not thinking about anything else. Then I will do my job as consciously as possible. This will be a meditation while working. It's like washing a cup while thinking about the cup. Better yet, just watch how you wash it. This is also meditation.

You can concentrate on anything, whether in an active or a passive state. Meditation requires high concentration on something; you do not need to perform any special ritual for this. Do you want to sit in the lotus position, do you want to lie in bed, do you want to go for a run, the main thing is to reduce the number of thoughts in your head, focusing your attention on one thing. Ideally, you need to completely get rid of all, at least visible, thoughts in your head. But for the first attempts, it will be a great success to at least reduce the number of thoughts for some time. At first there will be fewer of them, then only one thought will remain, and then there will be none at all, you will turn into a pure observer. This way you will come to a state of awareness. It’s very difficult for me not to think about something. But I can think about one thing, I’m good at it, though not for very long, about twenty minutes at most, maybe even less. And then all sorts of extraneous thoughts begin to creep into my head, creating noise and distracting my attention. But if you regularly practice meditation, then over time with its help you will be able to come to a state of awareness more often and for a longer period of time and during this time live some event, some situation extremely totally, merging with the general flow of life, stopping for yourself time, dissolved in the process of being.

I also believe, based solely on my experience, that awareness can be achieved through extremely deep study of something. Because in this case, we must discipline our thinking, focusing on a specific task, topic that we are solving or studying. After all, when we study something very carefully, down to the smallest details, we become completely immersed in this process of study and then all other thoughts that create noise and confusion in our head leave us. This is very well facilitated by interest in what we study, or, one might say, love for the work we do. You know how it happens when you can be so passionate about something that you don’t even notice how time passes, you don’t see or hear anything or anyone around you, you’re all in what you do, watch, read, everything your consciousness, all the resources of your mind are involved in this process and therefore you are fully aware of this process, which means you are in a state of awareness, even with some thoughts in your head. Only all these thoughts are subordinate to the current process, they are not in the past or in the future, they are here, in the present, and they are connected with the thing that you are doing or with that thing, with the phenomenon that you are studying. This is a great way to come to a state of awareness, which I really like.

To study something deeply means to think in one single direction, moving along a chain from one piece of information known to you to another, thus approaching the basis of what you are studying. When the mind works in such a disciplined manner, it is not distracted by extraneous thoughts that are not related to the subject or phenomenon you are studying. But for awareness, this is exactly what you need, to reduce the number of thoughts in your head. Therefore, when a person learns to control his thinking by studying something, he can try to completely get rid of all thoughts. Still, it’s easier to deal with one or two thoughts by depriving them of your attention than with a whole bunch of different thoughts that usually arise in our heads with undisciplined thinking.

And another way to come to awareness, which I know and which I have tested in practice, is self-observation. Self-observation is paying attention to everything we feel, think, and do. This is a concentration on all the processes occurring within us and on our behavior in the outside world. It’s impossible to just start observing yourself and not think about anything. Well, I don't know of such cases. This must be achieved gradually. Therefore, at first, we simply must mentally pronounce everything that happens to us, what we feel, think, do and explain to ourselves why and why we feel, think and do this way. This helps to focus your attention and narrow your thinking to rid it of unnecessary clutter. For example, you think about something and, as often happens, then this thought is interrupted by some other thought, then another and another, and you don’t track all this rushing of thoughts in your head, and therefore you don’t control this chaos. And in order to begin to observe yourself, in this case, your thoughts, you need to grab hold of one thought and think about where it came from, what it wants to tell you, what its purpose is. It turns out that a person will think about thoughts, thus directing his attention to some specific thought and not letting go of it until it is properly thought through, so that one can understand how it originated, what problem it was trying to solve and perhaps solved and where did it go, into what other thought was it reborn.

That is, you see, this is again a way to discipline your thinking in order to bring order to it, which is necessary so that there are fewer thoughts that arise chaotically and draw our attention to themselves. You can also track emotions, desires, some of your actions, the motives of which are not always clear and therefore you do something, so to speak, automatically. You just need to start asking yourself questions about the reason and purpose of everything you do, everything that happens to you. You can tell yourself that right now you are experiencing some feeling, for example, a feeling of fear or joy. Then you need to explain to yourself, or rather, look for an explanation for the occurrence of this feeling, think about what it gives you, how useful it is for you and what it encourages you to do.

Then you can see how this feeling fades away and also explain to yourself why this is happening, what happened to you, around you, that as a result this feeling disappeared or was replaced by another feeling. When a person thinks like this about himself, about everything that happens to him, when he analyzes his state and behavior in this way, he, as in the case of meditation, and in the case of studying something, reduces the number of thoughts in his head and collects his attention into one thin beam, which he directs to a certain area, in this case connected with himself. Then, from thinking about everything that happens to you and what you do, you can move on to observing yourself without any thoughts, without any internal dialogue, you will simply mentally see how some thoughts arise in you, for example, from - for some external stimulus, you will see how some emotion flared up in you, then faded away, you will watch the actions of your body, doing something out of habit. This is the state of awareness - just observation. The logic, as you can see, is the same for all methods, only the methods of its implementation are different.

Personal experience

I must admit, I didn’t try very hard to reach a state of awareness in order to achieve significant enough success in this matter. It’s hard for me to give up thinking, I’m a person who constantly thinks about something, reflects on something, analyzes something, solves some problems, plans something. My job is like this, it requires concentration, it requires concentration, during which the number of thoughts decreases, but they do not disappear completely. This is the way of my life, so it is difficult for me to induce such a state in myself. Mindfulness requires a completely different state of mind from the one I'm usually in. However, in life you need to be able to come to a state of awareness, which sometimes requires effort not to think about anything, and sometimes just intellectual relaxation. And I did and am doing this to get to know myself better. I know that people who understand this issue practice different techniques to achieve awareness. I always had to make an effort to calm my mind. I like to give the example of closing the door, because once I caught myself that they can do this in a state of full awareness, and in other cases automatically. To consciously close a door with a key and then not remember whether you closed it or not, you need to fully concentrate on this process, forgetting about everything.

In a state of awareness, we remember everything perfectly, because no thoughts distract our attention from what we are doing and then the brain considers this moment important. And he remembers everything important well. I had to concentrate on the process so that closing the door and working with the key would take place in a state of complete peace in my head, so that no thoughts would flow through it at that time. I even repeated to myself several times that I was doing this now - I was closing the door with the key, I was saying this single thought so that all other thoughts would disappear. After which the very thought that I was closing the door also went away and there was, as I think, nothing left except my observation of what I was doing. But, probably, some thoughts still remained; we are unlikely to be able to do anything, absolutely without some kind of mental stress. But this was the necessary minimum of thoughts that did not create much noise and did not require much attention to themselves. As a result, nothing bothered me, didn’t bother me, I didn’t experience any feelings, I just stayed in the present moment, closing the door. For some reason, it was this particular case that I remember best, although in other situations I came to a state of awareness. This is probably because it was closing the door for the first time that allowed me to plunge into this state; it was so strong that the whole situation remained in my memory as the most significant compared to other situations in which I also came to awareness. The primacy effect manifested itself in this way.

In my opinion, it is quite interesting to merge with the present moment like this, thanks to awareness. I would even say that this leads to bliss, to a state similar to nirvana, when nothing worries or disturbs you at all, you simply become part of the current process, observing it with utmost concentration. This is not at all like doing one thing, but mentally being in another place, as often happens to us. When I close the same door and think about something, I may not remember later whether I closed it or not. And in other situations, when you are not in the present moment, you may not remember much later. But what's worse, I've noticed that I can become restless, constantly waiting for something to happen if I can't fix my attention on what's happening here and now. This doesn't always happen, but when it does, it's quite unpleasant. It would seem that live what you have now, be in the present moment, because everything is good, there are so many interesting, pleasant things around that make you happy, you need to enjoy it, get enough of it. But the feeling of expecting something more, something more or something worse drives thoughts forward and creates a feeling of dissatisfaction, nervousness. Therefore, in order not to suffer so much, I try to concentrate on the current moment and if I succeed, then everything becomes fine, peace comes. I like to concentrate on some activity, on some ideas, dreams, on analyzing something, and not completely deprive myself of all thoughts. This is not a state of absolute awareness, because thoughts remain. But this also allows me to reach a state of peace, satisfaction and, I would even say, interest in what is happening, when everything that happens to me is interesting to me and I don’t want to think about anything else.

Separately, I would like to say about awareness of your thoughts. This is what I really like to do, although, I must admit, it’s hard to watch my every thought. Where it came from and what it encourages is the main thing that we need to understand in our thoughts. To become aware of your thought, you need to focus your attention on it, not react to this thought, mentally separating yourself from it, but simply watch what it does in general, how it flows in your head. Let’s say you had a thought about the sky that you looked at, think about what caused it to appear? The fact that you looked at the sky, live or in a picture, or in other cases, someone told you about it, that is, some external stimulus aroused this thought in you. The brain simply responded to an external signal and created a thought. Well, okay, let there be such a reaction, in the form of such a thought, you don’t have to somehow participate in its work, you don’t have to make any volitional efforts to somehow react to this thought. Just watch it, telling yourself that you have such a thought in your head and it exists, but don’t think of it as your thought, as something that belongs to you, don’t connect with it. Remember that it is just a product of your brain, just like the leaves are part of a tree, and not something that came into existence through your will, through your efforts and through your desire.

Look at your thought the same way you look at any other processes in the external world that arise for reasons beyond your control. This thought may suggest you do something, for example, say something that the sky is beautiful or think about it, but you don’t have to do it, you don’t have to work with this thought, just let it exist until it disappears. And it will disappear if circumstances do not support it. Now, if there is a fire in your home, then the thought about it and, in particular, about the need to extinguish this fire or escape from it will exist in your head until you do something to protect yourself. And you don’t have to react to those thoughts that don’t need processing at all; you can simply watch them, like a burning fire, like flowing water, like falling snow, in order to be aware of them and not worry about them.

At first you have a thought caused by certain circumstances, it can cause other thoughts in you, creating a whole matrix of thoughts, it can also cause some feelings, emotions in you, but then it will pass, if you do not develop it, you will not try to do something with her. This is how I observe my thoughts, this is how I am aware of them, I just don’t do anything with them. And by this we realize that I do not allow these thoughts to control me. I don’t control them myself, I control my decisions with the help of my will, which I make based on the thoughts that are interesting to me. I am not my thoughts, which is obvious, I am my will, with the help of which I control myself and influence circumstances. And this is a wonderful feeling, this feeling of freedom. Whatever appears in my head will not affect me without my consent.

Thus, mindfulness can make us happy people who can temporarily rid ourselves of any of our memories and any disturbing thoughts about the future, and in general from all thoughts that prevent us from living in the present. Mindfulness can help us come to a deep, one might say, perfect understanding of something by studying it thoroughly and focusing all our brain resources on it. And mindfulness also allows us to control our internal state, which we can simply observe, without allowing our thoughts and feelings to force us to take any actions that we do not need. With the help of our will, we decide for ourselves what and how we react to, what to participate in and what to experience.

Methods of self-knowledge

Self-knowledge occurs at the moment when a person begins to realize that he is different from others. What methods does the person use?

• Personality modeling. This method detects emotions. Positive and negative emotions and feelings towards people that contribute to successful cooperation or provoke conflicts. This method allows you to assess your position in the world around you.
• Method of unity of antipodes. Thanks to this method, a person understands that he has a positive attitude towards someone and a negative attitude towards someone. You definitely notice that you behave differently with different people.

Forms of self-awareness

There are 4 types of self-awareness . They manifest themselves in different ways.

1. Self-knowledge is the ability to identify oneself, understand one’s own physical and psychological characteristics, and realize one’s potential. Self-knowledge is realized through:

• self-observation - tracking the process of activity and communicating with other people, understanding the results and their compliance with the norms accepted in society;
• awareness of what personality assessments others give, what their attitude is;
• analysis of one’s own emotions, feelings, needs, the ability to transform them.

Self-knowledge becomes the basis for the formation of ideas about one’s own personality.

1. Self-control is the ability to regulate one’s own emotional state and actions if they do not coincide with internal attitudes, do not produce the desired result, or conflict with the demands of the outside world.
2. Self-esteem is the level of a person’s acceptance of his qualities, personal characteristics, love and respect for himself. A confident person has stable, adequate self-esteem. He is able to make informed decisions and bear responsibility for them. Low self-esteem manifests itself depending on the opinions of others, it is accompanied by a pronounced feeling of guilt and other problems. A person with high self-esteem demonstrates arrogance and arrogance.
3. Acceptance of yourself and your uniqueness, refusal of constant criticism of your own actions, self-deprecation. Self-acceptance also includes self-respect; it is formed when a person sets goals for himself and achieves them.

A person is sufficiently mature if all 4 types of self-awareness are sufficiently developed.

Means of self-knowledge

Knowing the methods of self-knowledge, a person begins to use means of self-knowledge that help him develop his spiritual world. Such tools help you better begin to understand yourself.

1. The first means is self-report. You can start a personal diary or blog where you can analyze the changes taking place in your life.
2. Cinema, books, theater. It is necessary to read, go to shows, developing spirituality.
3. Attending social and psychological events. Trainings help you to know yourself better.
4. Don't be afraid to consult a psychologist. This is not a doctor, he will simply help you understand yourself better.

Self-knowledge and self-esteem

Self-esteem is one of the components of self-knowledge. A person evaluates himself and builds his own value system. Self-esteem can be normal (adequate), underestimated or overestimated.

It's no secret that arrogant people are too self-confident and have low self-criticism. Low self-esteem causes timidity, making a person withdrawn and shy. And adequate self-esteem allows a person to be confident in himself and evaluate his capabilities and strengths without distortion.

Self-concept theory as a stage of self-knowledge

When a person has formed an idea of ​​himself, it is called self-concept. It includes: the personal “I” and the social “I”. The first shows how a person sees himself. And the second is how other people understand it.

This theory is based on two aspects: the desire to come into harmony with oneself and the opportunity to raise one’s self-esteem.

Self-concept has 2 vectors:

• objective is how we perceive ourselves in our lives;
• aspirational is a desired image of how we want to be perceived.

A person will always strive for the desired image in his life. This image can be based on a person in the past and at the present moment. Now the person has achieved significant results. Over time, the distance between the desired and the actual will shrink until it disappears.

The structure of self-awareness

Personal self-awareness includes several components:

• understanding oneself (cognitive component) - deep knowledge about oneself, building a self-concept. It includes the idea of ​​oneself as real, ideal, fantastic, as others see;
• attitude towards oneself at the emotional level - the ability to accept oneself with all the shortcomings and advantages, self-confidence or lack thereof. Self-esteem is formed from the first years of life under the influence of the attitude of parents and other significant adults towards the child; later it strengthens or, conversely, weakens when comparing oneself and others;
• the ability for self-regulation (behavioral component) - manifests itself through the desire for acceptance in society, to meet the requirements set by it, the desire to achieve respect;
• self-actualization - the desire to maximize one’s abilities. It manifests itself in the ability not to put off what is planned for later, in doing things that bring pleasure, constant development, the ability to accept innovations and adapt to them, awareness in relation to life, self-confidence;
• the degree of aspiration - in the desire to achieve more, the ability to set goals that are outside the zone of existing competencies.

In some sources, the components of self-awareness look like this (see table):

Personal self-awareness is not a static formation, but a process that requires constant development and improvement. If at any stage of life a person stops developing, his level of awareness decreases.

Self-discovery exercises

These exercises allow you to better understand yourself. Thanks to them, a person improves himself.

For example, you can perform the exercise “4 squares of the psychology of consciousness.” You need to divide a sheet of paper into 4 squares. In the first you need to write your positive traits and qualities, in the third you need to write what you think are negative qualities. Then you need to write in the adjacent squares the antipodes of these qualities, completely opposite. You need to be as honest with yourself as possible and understand that there are no absolutely ideal people and personality traits. You should improve yourself and focus on the positives while working on the negatives.

Books for self-knowledge

In conclusion, we invite you to get acquainted with a selection of books about self-knowledge. They will help those who are already engaged in the study of self-knowledge, as well as those who are just starting.

1. Colin Tipping "Radical Forgiveness";
2. Jen Sincero "NOT SY";
3. Eric Berne "Games People Play" People who play games";
4. John Gray "Men are from Mars, women are from Venus";
5. Viktor Frankl “Say Yes to Life!”;
6. Kate Peterson “Live and Learn”;
7. Richard Bach "Illusions".