What is an overly emotional person called: choleric or empath?

Greetings. The surrounding world, events, every little thing are reflected in the human soul. Something pleases, gives pleasure - the aroma of coffee in the morning or relaxing music in the evening, good news, pleasant company, an interesting film, a blooming flower... Others upset, irritate or anger - noisy neighbors, cloudy weather, a hole in a favorite sock, sour milk, unfulfilled a promise, an unheard alarm clock... That same response in the soul is human emotions, manifested in different people to varying degrees. Some people know how to control themselves, while others react to everything very violently - they squeal with delight at the sight of a chocolate bar, cry over the endings of children's cartoons, explode at the slightest failure, or, conversely, withdraw and remain silent for weeks if they are offended. Such personalities will be discussed on the blog. What is an overly emotional person called, what is emotionality in general, how does it manifest itself in temperament, who are empaths and how do they differ from ordinary people?

What is emotionality and its reflection in temperament

Emotionality is, according to the dictionary of practical psychologist S. Yu. Golovin, a human property that characterizes the manifestation of emotions: their content (the most significant phenomena and situations), quality (attitude to what is happening) and dynamics (appearance, course, cessation and expression). Emotionality is one of the main components that make up temperament.

Based on the type and intensity of expression of emotions, psychologists have identified four types of temperament:

1. Melancholic people seem calm to others, but passions are always boiling in their souls. It’s just that such people do not know how to express their emotions, they keep them inside or show them very sparingly. Outwardly, it is almost imperceptible that the melancholic person’s mood has changed. He always seems sad, and all because negative emotions in people with this type of temperament are more stable than positive ones. Melancholic people are easily upset or offended. They empathize with others, although they do not show it outwardly. Among the famous melancholic personalities were Alexandre Dumas and Sergei Yesenin, Frederic Chopin and Honore de Balzac.
2. Sanguine people are the opposite of melancholic people. Emotions in their souls arise more slowly, but also remain for a long time. At the same time, sanguine people know how to control their expression. They are capable of bright flashes, but only if they want it. People of this temperament are strong and stable, prone to dominance. They are not easily angered, but they will hold grudges for a long time. Famous sanguine people are Alexander Sergeevich Pushkin and Giordano Bruno.
3. Phlegmatic people are the most balanced type. Their emotions are born with difficulty and find their way out even more difficult. At the same time, phlegmatic people store their feelings for a very long time, often for the rest of their lives. For those around them, such people are a mystery, because what they think and feel always remains sealed. Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky had exactly this temperament.
4. Choleric people are the opposite of phlegmatic people. Their emotions arise quickly and manifest themselves violently, but change very quickly. The mood of choleric people fluctuates, but more often remains on a positive wave. These people do not hold grudges, but can explode over some trifle. They grab onto every task, but quickly lose interest. They fall in love at first sight, but also quickly change the object of their adoration. The famous choleric person is the French writer Victor Marie Hugo.

Representatives of one specific temperament are rarely found among people. Usually everything is mixed up in the human soul, but a certain type is expressed more intensely. Under the influence of life factors, different aspects of character appear, and the personality itself can change over time. For example, if they find themselves in a stressful situation, phlegmatic people can produce a fireworks display of emotions that is unusual for them, and when it’s all over, they can return to their previous balanced state.

How to recognize anger and anger?

A person who understands his emotional reactions easily switches from one state to another. For example, when a specialist is overcome by laziness, he can independently prepare himself for work. Or, if you feel sad, go to unwind and improve your mood. It is important to learn to understand yourself in order to manage your reactions. Using the example of anger and malice, let’s look at what principle is used to recognize emotions.

The first step is to observe your emotions. It is important to record the moments when you feel irritation, smoothly flowing into anger, and then into anger. The first signal of anger will be physical manifestations:

• sweat on the palms,
• tense facial muscles
• painful sensations in the abdomen,
• dizziness.

Emotional manifestations:

• depression,
• the desire to give up everything and leave,
• irritability and anger.

To these signs of anger you can add the desire to be rude and respond in a sarcastic tone, raise your voice, and rub your head. If you can consciously identify such manifestations in yourself, then this will already be enough to reduce your anger. There are several other methods that will help you recognize and manage your emotions.

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What is another name for overly emotional people?

An emotional person is no matter how they call it, the following synonyms are common in everyday life:

• hypersensitive;
• hot;
• ardent;
• passionate;
• temperamental;
• excitable;
• pathetic;
• zealous;
• gusty;
• empathic;
• affective;
• gusty;
• expansive.

The adjective emotional has noticeably fewer antonyms - it is insensitive, callous, dry, cool or balanced.

Signs of hypersensitivity

You can understand that you or someone is a hypersensitive person by several signs:

1. Deep, intense, complex and persistent emotions. Such people are unusually lively, sometimes “painfully alive.” They feel everything so acutely that they often cannot cope with the release of emotions, they simply cannot control themselves. Their mood changes instantly. They can feel very good, and five minutes later incredibly bad. They perceive music as wave-like streams that awaken feelings corresponding to the motive - joy or sadness, delight or despondency. The plots of books and films captivate you, and the paintings of great artists bring you to tears.
2. High sensitivity. For hypersensitive individuals, there are practically no people who are mysteries. They see through everyone, recognize intentions and read the moods of others. Plus, such individuals notice every little thing, instantly grasp the meaning, as they say, “see to the root,” not paying attention to the superficial husk. This is not always good. It's hard to control yourself when you see injustice and hypocrisy. It is difficult to adequately communicate with unpleasant people if it is impossible to avoid such communication (for example, with your superiors). This causes torment or even trouble for emotional natures.
3. Rich inner world and developed imagination. Hypersensitive people have dialogues with themselves, have imaginary friends and dive inward, closing themselves off in their own little world. They can live imaginary lives, feeling like heroes of incredible stories. Imagination for them is a lifeline in especially difficult life moments. They hide behind fantasies to make it easier to survive difficulties. Emotional individuals grasp everything on the fly, they quickly collect grains of important information from the world around them, digest them and put the picture together into a single whole. They see the essence of things, not the shell. They persistently try to get to the bottom of their essence. Therefore, they are characterized by ardent self-criticism. They are often dissatisfied with themselves. They are characterized by such qualities as criticality, perfectionism and the “excellent student syndrome.”
4. Indifference to the experiences of others. An empathetic person is what they say about those who read other people’s emotions on a subconscious level and experience them together with the owner. Sympathy, empathy, the desire to share grief or joy with someone, the inability to say “no” are the key characteristics of empaths. Empaths are always hypersensitive, but not every emotional person is empathetic. It is worth talking about who empaths are in more detail, which is done below.
5. Existential anxiety. Emotional individuals are characterized by worries about the global - the transience of time, the finitude of life, the purposelessness of existence and other incomprehensible things. They are annoyed that others do not care about all this and do not think about the future, do not try to leave a mark in history. Therefore, they themselves strive to continuously develop, move forward and worry about how others will remember them.
6. Self-expression in creativity. The emotions of hypersensitive individuals are expressed in creativity. Their products are not necessarily displayed publicly. They can gather dust on the closet and be shown to those closest to you. But even among famous writers, poets, musicians and artists there are a lot of hypersensitive people.

The presence of all or several signs (some may be implicit) indicates a person with increased emotionality and hypersensitivity.

Build your emotional dictionary

At first glance, emotions seem simple and easy to describe. But, for example, the same anger can be divided into irritability, impatience, disappointment and other emotions. To facilitate the recognition of feelings, it is necessary to expand your own vocabulary of emotions. Try dividing emotions into categories and writing several synonyms for each category.

Example:

Anxiety: tension, anxiety, stress, caution.

It is also important to distinguish emotional reactions from states. Time difference - emotions are fleeting, but the condition can last from several hours to several days.

Pros and cons of hypersensitivity

Is it good or bad to be an overly emotional person? In fact, it is impossible to answer this question unequivocally. First the good:

1. Such individuals build deep and lasting relationships. They give themselves to their other half without reserve. They love sincerely, express it in every possible way, feel their partner, empathize with him and live with their chosen one all their lives.
2. Highly sensitive people always know what they feel. They do not have average unrecognized states; if they are sad, then they are sad, if they are happy, then they are happy. In this regard, it’s easy with him: you don’t need to sit and guess what’s in a person’s soul.
3. They strive for balance and perfection, so they are not afraid of change. If they feel bad, they try to make it feel good.
4. People who are too emotional understand perfectly well what mental pain is, so they try not to cause it to anyone; they are not capable of meanness and betrayal. They do not plot and do not manipulate people.
5. They are critical of themselves, so they avoid judging others.
6. They never hypocrite and always say what they think, although it often backfires on them. But such straightforward individuals can be trusted one hundred percent.
7. They are adventurous and inventive. There's never a dull moment with them.
8. They easily do good and do not expect anything in return. This is a plus for those around them, but sometimes it becomes a minus for themselves, since self-interested people quickly understand what’s what and, without a twinge of conscience, begin to take advantage of their kindness.
9. Emotional individuals value attention and every little detail. You don't have to go out of your way to please them. It is enough to say a few kind words or give, for example, a chocolate bar or a bouquet of daisies from the yard.
10. They are positive and look for the good in everything.
11. They find a common language with everyone, can carry on a conversation on any topic and do not know what awkward silence is.
12. They are always ready for adventure. It’s easy to start a new project, hitchhike to the ends of the world, change your image to support a friend, move to another country for your loved one!

These are all the advantages that lead to the disadvantages of emotional people. Sometimes there are “too many” of them, especially introverts and phlegmatic people feel this way. On the one hand, they are drawn to them to fill the gaps in their dull life. On the other hand, they quickly get tired and irritated. There are always those who want to take advantage of selflessness and the desire to help others. Intolerance to hypocrisy creates a lot of problems for them in communicating with the “right” people. But they cannot smile on demand, knowing that this guy, whoever he is, is a hypocrite and a scoundrel. In addition, those around them often mistake their hypersensitivity for hysteria, not understanding the nature of such individuals, and their easy-going nature for frivolity.

Who is an empath

And now about empaths, what empathy is and why not every emotional person is empathic. Psychologists began to study empathy as a personality quality at the beginning of the twentieth century. The term defines a person’s ability to absorb emotional flows from the surrounding world (people, animals) and experience them as their own. In this case, the object does not have to be nearby. Just learning about someone's joy, and especially about someone's grief, an empath begins to worry. Such people do not watch or listen to the news, because it is emotionally difficult for them to cope with themselves after hearing stories about incidents, wars, disasters and other horrors happening in the world.

A little more about empaths:

1. An empathic person sympathizes with everyone - people and animals, acquaintances and strangers, and is easily moved. He is able to give his last to help someone. Therefore, it is better for empaths not to see messages from charitable foundations, such as “the child urgently needs surgery” or “the dog was hit by a car.” This is not stupidity. They just feel the pain of others fully and even more strongly and cannot do anything about it.
2. They have special knowledge, greater than intuition. They recognize lies and suffer when loved ones deceive them.
3. In crowded places they feel depressed, because other people's emotions roll over them like a wave.
4. If loved ones are sick, then empaths may experience the same symptoms, since they take everything on themselves.
5. They often become a “vest” for those around them, and their soul turns into a “dumping ground” for other people’s problems. This is a heavy load.
6. They are often used, so fatigue and emotional burnout are constant companions of empaths.
7. Loneliness is like medicine for them. Only by hiding from the world can these people rest.
8. They are always sincere and fair.
9. Empathetic individuals are constantly searching for answers and have a thirst for new knowledge.
10. They hate clutter and love cleanliness. But at the same time, strict rules for them are like shackles that deprive them of freedom.
11. Such people speak little, but are excellent listeners.
12. They don't buy used items because they feel the energy of the previous owners.
13. Most empaths are vegetarians, as they acutely feel the fear and pain of a killed animal or fish.
14. They try in every possible way to renounce the world, so they may seek solace in alcohol, tobacco or even drugs.

Empaths are considered by many to be strange, headstrong, overly shy or unsociable. After all, they avoid large companies, are always unaware of the news, do not like to discuss others, do not put a smile on their face and do not feign happiness. Almost all the time they look unhappy and depressed, which is not surprising when you feel all the emotions of those around you.

Do we need over-emotional people? Definitely yes! Without them, this world would be gray and insipid. Understanding such a person is not easy, and getting used to him is even more difficult. But if he is nearby, then it will definitely never be boring.

Emotional intelligence and ways to develop it

“At the root of every strong emotion is a urge to action.
Managing this impulse is the essence of emotional intelligence.” Daniel Goleman writer, psychologist, science journalist (USA)

What is an emotion?

Emotion
(from the Latin
emoveo
- “shock”, “wave”) is a mental process of medium duration, reflecting a subjective evaluative attitude towards existing or possible situations and the objective world.

How does emotion arise?

1. First comes the stimulus from the outside world.
2. Then the processes responsible for emotion are launched in the subcortex of the brain.

Emotions are characterized by three components:

1. An experienced or conscious sensation in the psyche of an emotion.
2. Processes occurring in the nervous, endocrine, respiratory, digestive and other systems of the body.
3. Observable expressive complexes of emotions, including on the face.

Emotions are distinguished from other types of emotional processes: affects, feelings and moods. Like many other mental phenomena, emotions are understood differently by different authors, so the above definition can be considered neither accurate nor generally accepted. Remember that emotions and feelings are not the same thing. Although many psychologists consider these phenomena to be the same.

Theory of Basic Emotions

Basic emotions
are elementary emotions that are no longer split into anything, and are themselves components of other complex emotions.

Izard Carroll is an American psychologist. Specialist in human emotions. Author of the differential theory of emotions. In the analysis of emotions, he identified three levels:

1. Neurophysiological
2. Expressive
3. Subjective

Carroll described such fundamental emotions as interest, pleasure, surprise, disgust, anger, contempt, grief, shame, guilt, fear.
Paul Ekman is an American psychologist, professor at the University of California, San Francisco, and an expert in the fields of emotion, interpersonal communication, psychology, and “lie detection.” Identified basic emotions: happiness, sadness, disgust, surprise, anger, fear.

The theory of emotions, which emerged in 2014, is very simple, it describes only 4 emotions. When several people saw portraits of other people's facial expressions, they were given 6 basic emotions. The experiment revealed that many people do not see the differences between some emotions. Of the six emotions presented, four were read best:

1. joy
2. sadness
3. fear
4. anger

Based on four basic emotions, you can develop others; these will be some kind of add-ons.
Daniel Goleman: Emotional Intelligence. Why it may matter more than IQ

American psychologist Daniel Goleman argues that our emotions play a much larger role in achieving success at home and at work than is commonly believed. But what is “emotional intelligence”? Can it be measured? What is the difference between “ordinary” intelligence and “emotional” intelligence?

Buy

What is emotional intelligence?

Emotional intelligence
, or
EQ
(English
emotional intelligence
) is the sum of a person’s skills and abilities to recognize emotions, understand the intentions, motivations and desires of other people and their own, as well as the ability to manage their emotions and the emotions of other people in order to solve practical problems.

Emotional intellect

is one of the most popular concepts of the last decade. Experts from the World Economic Forum included it in the top 10 most important skills in 2021. On the Amazon.com website, for the query “emotional intelligence” you can find more than 6,000 links (for comparison, Ozon.ru provided only 138 products on the topic of “emotional intelligence” in March 2018). So it can be assumed that in Russia the topic is still only at the beginning of its development.

If emotional intelligence is not developed, it is very difficult for a person to recognize his emotions and read the state of other people.

Short story

In 1990, researchers John (Jack) Mayer and Peter Salovey published a short paper in a scientific journal called “Emotional Intelligence.”
In it, they described their idea of ​​what “emotional intelligence” is, substantiated why, in their opinion, we are talking about intelligence, and outlined the difference between social and emotional intelligence. In 1995, New York Times journalist Daniel Goleman released his famous best-selling book, Emotional Intelligence. It stayed on the New York Times bestseller list for more than a year and a half. Daniel Goleman is often called the author of the concept of “emotional intelligence,” but this is not entirely correct.

When the concept of emotional intelligence gained wide popularity, the Israeli psychologist Ruven Bar-On also decided to compete for the primacy of the topic. Legend has it that “in the first copy of his doctoral dissertation, which was submitted in 1985, Bar-On proposed a quantitative approach to creating an “EQ analogous to an IQ score.” However, people who saw that very first copy claim that there is no talk of anything like that. One way or another, little-known in Russia, Bar-On is one of the most authoritative experts in the field of emotional intelligence in the world.

Mayer-Salovey model

Model Ruvena Bar-On

Goleman model

All models have something in common with each other and contain basically the same components, but each of the psychologists brought something of their own.

What's good about emotional intelligence? To whom is it important?

EQ is based on four factors:

1. Self-awareness
2. Self-control
3. Empathy
4. Relationship management

A good leader will effectively cope with his responsibilities when his emotional intelligence reaches 85%.

The Importance of Emotional Intelligence Quotient

A person with high emotional intelligence:

• understands his emotions;
• knows what role feelings and emotions play in communicating with people;
• knows how to express his emotions in such a way as to establish and maintain friendly relationships with others;
• strives to learn and enrich his inner world;
• knows how to regulate their emotions;
• knows how to manage internal motivation and maintain the mindset to achieve goals.

A person with low EQ:

• conflicted;
• irritable;
• indecisive;
• strives to keep everything under control;
• subject to strong feelings of anger.

“It is very important to understand that emotional intelligence is not the opposite of intelligence, it is not the triumph of the heart over the head - it is the only way the two intersect.”

David R. Caruso is a psychologist, professor of psychology at Yale University (USA), management specialist and co-author of the concept of emotional intelligence.

There are no bad and good emotions. We need all emotions. Even fear, sadness and anger.

Phases of managing emotions:

1. Identification. Emotion recognition.
2. Understanding the cause of the emotion. What was its launch?
3. Intelligence will help you direct your emotion for your own good and make it useful.
4. Direct actions aimed at making the emotion useful. Using the Rules of the World - everything in the world should be useful. Since emotion is a resource, you need to use this resource.

When and who needs to develop emotional intelligence?

• When you realize that you are stuck in one emotion.
• When you step on the same rake, you constantly make the same mistake.
• When you are stuck in a certain cycle and do not move towards success, do not develop, and stagnate.
• When other people's lives are much more interesting than your life.

Sergey Shabanov, Alena Aleshina: Emotional intelligence. Russian practice

The concept of emotional intelligence came into use recently, in 1990, but during this time it has become an integral part of Western psychology. The book shows how to apply accumulated knowledge to Russian reality. We often talk about the mysterious Russian soul. Perhaps it is emotional intelligence that guides us more than IQ?

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How to develop emotional intelligence?

Step one

The first and most important thing is to develop the skill of awareness of your emotions.
Despite the fact that this skill usually looks the least interesting, it is hardly possible to control anything without being aware of your actions. That is why, first of all, it is important to learn to understand at each moment of time (if necessary) what I am feeling now, that is, what emotion I am experiencing. This is not so easy to do, since there are a number of objective difficulties. For training, it is advisable to start tracking your emotional state every day at a certain time; for this, you can set reminders on your phone with the question “How are you feeling?” or keep a diary of emotions in which you will write down the results of your work every day. Throughout the day, track what emotions you experience, what caused these emotions, track the general background of your mood.

At the time you choose, record the facts: what are the strongest emotions you remember today, at what moments they arose. Write down what sensations arose in your body while experiencing these emotions, what thoughts came to you at that moment? Any emotion is a release of a certain hormone. Therefore, it is important to track where sensations originate in the body.

Record your observations in free form or in a table:

Step two

Improving skills in understanding other people's emotions. To do this, you can pay attention to the nonverbal behavior of another person and develop empathy skills. If communication occurs with a loved one, you can check the correctness of your guesses by asking: “How are you feeling?” or making the assumption: “I think you’re upset about something right now.”

Practice “Mute TV”

Turn on some feature film that you haven’t watched yet and turn off the sound.
Watch a movie for some time, observing the characters’ gestures, facial expressions, location in space and thinking about what emotions they are experiencing now. This is a very exciting process. If you don't really like watching feature films this way, watch some TV debates or news. Watch a fragment of a familiar film and a fragment of an unfamiliar one with the sound turned off. What is the difference in the observation process? Does knowing the plot hinder or help you compare “nonverbalities” with emotions? Compare films of different genres. What are the similarities and differences between nonverbal behavior across cultures? Watch a movie with famous actors and some cheap TV series. Compare the nonverbal expressions of actors with real people in some reporting program.

Practice “Public Transport”

This game has an additional bonus. To watch silent television, you must have time, a television or computer, and the consent of relatives to use it. And when you are on public transport, you have free time, which can be occupied with useful activities. Therefore, when you are tired of the newspaper you bought for a trip on the subway, or the book you took on the train or plane runs out, you can switch to this game. How do these people feel? If you see a couple, what kind of relationship are they in? If someone tells someone something, is the story funny or sad?

Step three

Managing your emotions.
Important! Do not confuse managing emotions and controlling them, suppressing them. Often the only way of managing that we master perfectly is to suppress our emotions. However, emotions cannot be suppressed forever; they will either break through in another situation (which is called “accumulated”), or will manifest themselves against a psychosomatic background (for example, a headache will begin). Young children are often told: “Boys don’t cry,” “Good girls don’t do that,” etc. Therefore, many of us are accustomed to suppressing our emotions in order to fit into society. There are other ways to manage your emotions. We know many of them: breathe, walk, do some physical activity. One of the effective ways to manage your emotions is verbalization - describing your state out loud: “I’m a little worried, anxious, feeling slightly irritated,” etc. You can not only change the intensity of a negative emotion, but also replace it with another, more positive one.

Practice “Body Methods”

Choose a body-based method for managing emotions that can be used in almost any situation. For example, imperceptibly clench and unclench your fists. Stand on your tiptoes several times. Get up, walk a little and sit down again. Practice using it at least once an hour.

Practice "Problems"

Write a list of problems that are relevant to you.
Remember the maximum number of problems (note: at first some difficulties may arise, and then the process will begin - we know how to look for problems). Now reframe these problems into goals. Make sure to formulate goals positively, that is, without using the particle “not”, as well as the words “quit”, “stop”, “stop”. Formulate your goals as specifically as possible, and be sure to determine the time frame by which you plan to achieve them. Notice how your emotional state has changed compared to when you started.

Step four

Managing other people's emotions. This includes a whole range of skills associated with the ability to calm another person if he is very angry, afraid or upset, as well as the ability, on the contrary, to “infect” other people with positive emotions.

Practice “Emotional motivators in my company”

Think about it and write down what you can do to maintain a constant atmosphere of drive, excitement and enthusiasm in your company.

Practice “Emotional Balance”

Choose some personal or business relationships that are meaningful to you.
For personal relationships, it is enough to remember a period from several days to a week; for business relationships, it is better to take a longer period - one or two months. Divide the sheet in half with a vertical line, mark the left column as “+”, and the right column as “-”. Write down in the left column all your actions that, in your opinion, improved the state of your account (those actions that improved your partner’s mood), in the right column - those that worsened it. See how you have impacted your emotional balance in this relationship over this period. Have you managed to improve it or at least maintain it at the same level? Or is the number of actions in the right column becoming depressingly prevalent?

If you're one of those people who only has a bunch of great actions in the left column, ask yourself if you're throwing the balance off balance there, too. Are you giving too much to your partners and asking too little in return?

In both cases, it is worth drawing up an action plan that will help you maintain balance in a more or less equilibrium state. It is useful to carry out such an analysis for yourself at least once a month for the most significant figures and “accounts” and once every few months for people important to you.

Bonus tip

Be sure to watch the cartoon “Puzzle” if you haven’t seen it yet. Get a lot of impressions and learn how emotions arise.