Why does a man hide his feelings for a woman, why is he afraid and embarrassed?

Often, when meeting a guy, a girl begins to notice that he behaves primly and shyly in her presence. Many ladies make the wrong conclusions, which lead to the severance of friendly or supposedly romantic relationships.

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Signs of a Shy Guy

A shy guy often seems shy and indecisive to girls. These traits prevent him from meeting the opposite sex and building romantic relationships. If he likes a girl, he cannot make the first step and misses a happy opportunity to get closer.

Many women are sure that if a man likes them, he will show overt signs of attention and take various actions to win her heart. But timid, silent guys can walk in circles for a long time, stammer and blush during meetings, without taking any action.

How to understand the feelings of a shy man

I hope you have already met the boyfriend of your dreams, go on dates, and enthusiastically discuss various topics. He became less shy, afraid of glances, signs of attention from you, the following problem arises: “How can you tell if a young man is experiencing tender feelings?” Shows emotions with restraint, looks closely, studies. Are there signs indicating tender feelings? How can you feel like you are liked? How do you know that he is also interested in a relationship with you? I can tell you from experience: “It took a while to figure it out.” How did it happen? I'll tell you now.

Reasons for a man's embarrassment

It also happens that not only a quiet person in life, but also a rather brave guy can suddenly become shy in front of a girl. There can be many reasons for unexpected shyness.

Beauty of a girl. Men are attracted to bright women, but many feel shy in front of them, afraid of being unworthy of a real beauty.
Fear of rejection. It doesn’t matter whether a girl is pretty or not, a man is afraid that the person he likes will reject him for various reasons.
The girl's behavior. An overly confident lady who has a harsh voice or arrogance can scare away a potential gentleman, causing him to have an attack of timidity.
Fear that the girl is not free. Guys are shy in this case because they are afraid to find out about the lover the girl they like might have.

These and other reasons lead to the fact that it is difficult for a guy to take the first step, so many relationships that could have developed harmoniously do not even have time to begin.

Attitude of others

You must learn one truth: you cannot please everyone without exception. All people are different, often they do not suit each other at the energy level. Remember, you also have friends who don’t particularly appeal to you. And do they feel less happy because of this? If you don’t impress some, you will like others, there’s no problem with that.

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How love is born

Before a man truly falls in love, he will first go through certain stages.

Assessment. When meeting a girl, a guy examines her appearance, determines the degree of attractiveness, and tries on the role of a partner for her. As you know, the first impression is formed by appearance.
The emergence of interest in a girl. There is a need for closer acquaintance and communication. There is an interest in getting to know the young lady better.
Attraction. At this stage, the young man begins to court his chosen one and looks at her reaction.
Impression. The guy is trying to show his best qualities, doing everything in order to make the best impression on the girl, to amaze her.
Belief. Feelings become stronger. The chosen one occupies all thoughts in my head and begins to dream. The guy realizes that he constantly thinks about the girl, cannot concentrate on other things, all thoughts are only about her.
Repeated persuasion. This stage is characterized by the understanding that the young lady was enchanted, and the idea of a serious relationship is born.
Love. A serious romance begins, the feelings are very strong.

Features of shy men

Shyness takes different forms and is expressed in different ways. The same guy is sometimes able to jump into the river to save a kitten, but does not find the strength to approach the girl and get acquainted... He works as a rescuer, carries children out of burning houses, but does not know how to swear in public institutions in response to the arbitrariness of unscrupulous officials... How does this happen? Let's name the external signs of shyness in men:

"Can't be seen or heard." It seems that the person is incapable of decisive action: he is downtrodden, quiet, constrained in his movements. It’s a paradox, but shy men are capable of feats even more than “roosters” who flaunt their brutality, pumped up figure and other dubious “advantages”.
Passivity in communication. Shyness is a quality that makes it difficult for a guy to find an interlocutor and, even more so, a life partner. He gives the initiative to those around him. He waits for people to get to know him, and does not make contact first. It is important that shy people do not avoid communication, but rather want it. Only they are not able to be the first to decide to talk with a stranger (or with a not very close “acquaintance”).
Delicacy. It’s a nice trait, but you can only recognize it through communication. He will not be rude, will not raise sensitive topics (and if he does, he will carefully avoid them), and will not impose himself. But he will listen to stories about your problems, sympathize, and will not demand anything in return.
Low self-esteem and anxiety. At least it seems so at first. And the man himself can be sure of this. Shyness is often associated with thoughts about one’s own unattractiveness, “inferiority.” Therefore, such a person is rarely given high positions or public recognition. And the woman whom he has secretly loved for many years will marry another without knowing about his feelings.
Stability. It's difficult to say whether this is a good trait or a bad one. She just is. A man does not want to change his life, he clings to what he already has. Any changes are painful. He will not look for a better job, he will not (most likely) decide to open his own business... But look from the other side - such a man will not cheat, he will not be the first to divorce.
Mirroring of actions and feelings. But here’s what they said at the beginning: the guy is usually timid and downtrodden, it’s difficult for him to communicate with representatives of public institutions (and even with store clerks). But in extreme conditions, hitherto dormant resources seem to be activated. Only the opportunity rarely appears, and in everyday life it is not particularly useful.
Vulnerability and sensuality. Another “feminine” feature. The emotions of modest people are deep and persistent. Therefore, it is difficult for them to deceive and hide something from a loved one (if one suddenly appears). And another plus - thanks to such features, you can turn a shy man into a wonderful partner in bed “for yourself.” He will not be selfish; he will try to please you first, and then himself.

This is a complete list of the main qualities of a shy man. Not all of them manifest themselves in a particular representative. And you need to get to know the person well in order to notice the described qualities. Usually, modesty has to be corrected, because, as mentioned earlier, in ordinary life it causes nothing but problems. How to do it? First, it would be nice to understand the reasons for the formation of shyness.

Are your goals modest?

The question is: where did you unearth such a treasure, why did it fascinate you, and what are your goals? After all, modest people have never been in fashion, and they themselves are not eager to win the heart of a lady. But this is exactly what every girl needs - to be looked after, and not she to be looked after by a man.

It’s unlikely that you met him at a noisy party and he, shouting over the sounds of music, offered to treat you to a cocktail. Your meeting place could be:

You are colleagues. You liked him for his appearance and tenacity. Yes, modest people are assiduous, they know how to make a career with their own minds without cheating. The bosses like such hard workers, and therefore they are rarely poor.
You live nearby. It just so happens that you see each other often in the neighborhood, and you like him. Only you have a casual acquaintance: “Hello!” - "Hello!". But he is single, handsome, although too shy.
Casual acquaintance. Some unexpected situation brought you together, or it was supposedly random - you were invited to the company where this beech was located. But you liked him, or they described him in a positive way.

Let's be honest: apart from external data and recommendations from third parties, he most likely did not attract you in any way. But if you are pretty and have a pleasant character, then you yourself can interest him.

What matters is what do you need it for? If you're just tired of loneliness and hassle from other men, then that's normal. But God forbid you pursue selfish goals in relation to him, for example, if you were bribed by his financial viability.

Yes, you can make him fall in love with you, enter the complex circle of his trust, and then rob him like crazy. Humble does not mean greedy, he can give you everything. But you will kill the person in him forever. Can you live the rest of your life as a moral killer? Think about it.

Which women make men the most shy around?

There are basically two reasons for a guy’s shyness: either he cares about the girl, or he’s afraid of her.

If the boss is a scandalous person, then feeling constrained when she appears is a normal reaction. A man does not want to cause “fire” on himself with his behavior and fall under the hot hand.

Young people are often embarrassed at the sight of beautiful young ladies. They involuntarily compare themselves with her: life achievements, wealth, even appearance. Therefore, against the backdrop of independent and successful girls, men feel inferior, although this is not at all the case.

Hygiene and style

If you don't feel confident, start with personal hygiene and neat, well-chosen clothing. Take a shower morning and evening and make it a habit to take care of yourself. Clothes must be clean and of high quality. If you cannot choose it yourself, seek help from specialists. They will choose the best style for your age and appearance, which will allow you to increase your level of self-confidence.

What not to do

If you notice clear signs that your communication is moving to a new level and you are one step away from the official status of his girlfriend, consider what mistakes you need to avoid.

Don't offer sex first. Even the shyest young man will find an opportunity to hint about his desire for a close relationship. Your initiative in this matter may simply frighten him away.
Don't start serious conversations about your status in his life. Remember, men don't like to talk about relationships. They prefer to show their feelings through actions rather than words.
Don't be intrusive. Don't forget, if isolation is a character trait of a young person, you are dealing with an introvert. And they need to periodically take a break from society. Be understanding about this feature and give your boyfriend personal space.
Don't try to make him jealous on purpose. Men don’t like to sort things out, and introverts even more so. In addition, such behavior can dramatically change a guy's opinion of you in a negative direction.

Calmness is a hallmark of closed people. It guarantees the absence of constant scandals and quarrels. This is why girls love shy guys. If you behave correctly, you can build very comfortable relationships with such young people.

Sight

Some people are so shy that they cannot look their conversation partners in the eye. If you fall into this category, be sure to overcome this fear. Gather all your courage and set yourself this task. After all, you are a representative of the stronger sex, so physical tests are up to you. Don't look away and stay confident, you'll soon get used to it.

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Strengths of Shy Guys

Many girls believe that a timid guy can be boring, therefore, without having time to properly get to know a modest person, they go in search of a self-confident “brutal”. Psychologists advise not to rush to conclusions, since a shy young man can turn out to be an excellent husband and a great father. A timid man has the following qualities:

delicacy;
courtesy;
the ability to value relationships;
affection;
emotionality;
the ability to feel your partner.

Among other things, timid men adapt to a woman in all areas of life, therefore they are especially well suited for powerful, strong personalities who cannot tolerate objections, as well as for anyone who would like to have a devoted and faithful life partner nearby.

Increasing sustainability

Stress resistance is now one of the necessary qualities. Therefore, you need to believe in yourself and stop being afraid of negative factors. Eliminate phrases such as “I always”, “everyone”, etc., as they instill uncertainty and do not allow you to cope with stress. Tune in for the best, but don't be afraid of unpleasant surprises.

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Pay close attention to his body language

We have already talked about how to see obvious signs of attention and recognize love in a completely closed guy. But what if he behaves completely normally: he doesn’t show his cards to you, but he doesn’t mask his feelings with the utmost caution? This is the most difficult case when you will have to be as attentive as possible and catch all the signals coming from him, even if he did not try to send them.

Without exception, all guys, like girls, subconsciously signal their sympathy for a person

. This can include involuntary timid glances that you throw at each other against your own will. Trembling knees and slurred speech, a deep blush on the cheeks... But there are also less obvious signs that also relate to body language.

If a guy likes you, he will subconsciously reveal

all their movements are towards you. Imagine that you are communicating in a large, lively company: no matter who he talks to or who he addresses, if there is sympathy, the toes of his shoes will definitely be turned in your direction. This applies not only to shoes, but to hands and posture in general - it will be directed at you

, as if conducive to an open conversation.

In addition, a guy in love always unconsciously repeats the facial expressions of his object of desire

– smiles, frowns, bites his lip, and so on. But even if you haven’t noticed any of the signs described in the article, don’t despair: all guys are different, and they also show their feelings in different ways. One day you will definitely notice something that will mark the beginning of a sincere and trusting relationship between you.

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Video: What a girl looks like through the eyes of a guy in love

Attention, TODAY only! At school age, almost everyone hides the feelings that arise in relation to one or another classmate or neighbor.

This is repeated more than once or twice, and over time this secrecy becomes a habit.

It has been noticed that men in general are noticeably shyer than women.

However, it's not just shyness. There is also usually uncertainty and fear present.

Nonverbal signs that a man likes you: list

Nonverbal signs of sympathy
Signs that a man likes you can manifest themselves nonverbally, that is, in his facial expressions, gestures, and so on. Of course, dating someone these days can be difficult, and even more so when you don’t know how the person treats you.

There are eight nonverbal signs that let you know that a man likes you:

Long eye contact . This is the most obvious sign of sympathy. If he looks at you for a long time, it means he likes you. If you don’t have such contact, it means your partner doesn’t feel very comfortable and needs a different approach to him.
It's close . When a man feels sympathy, he tries to be closer so that he can hear every word. This may not be noticeable in a crowded bar or other public place. But this is true if you have time to notice.
Crossing views . Eye contact is always important, but if your partner meets with you often and does not miss opportunities, then he is interested in you.
Openness . If he slouches, it's bad because he's bored. But if he sits straight and in an open position, then this, again, indicates interest.
Redness . If you made him smile and then he blushed, then he is not indifferent to you. Usually women blush more often, so if he blushes, you can be happy.
Mirroring . This is an indicator of increased trust. If someone likes you, then they begin to copy your actions. It `s naturally.
Laughter and smile . The basis of flirting is laughing at every joke and smiling even without talking. This will all help you understand that the interlocutor is interested. A smile means that you are truly interesting.
Touches . This is a definite sign of flirting, and if a person flirts, it means he shows sympathy. During a conversation, he may touch your hand or another place, then rest assured, he is not indifferent to you.

What if he doesn’t hide his love?

Despite stereotypes about determined guys, girls often have to take matters into their own hands and be the first to take the initiative. What to do if the girl herself is not ready to overcome her shyness and take the first step? All that remains is to carefully observe and try to understand whether it is worth hoping for something more and making far-reaching plans. Because we girls love plans very much, and we don’t want them to end up as ordinary castles in the air. Let's answer the question together about how a guy in love behaves and try to figure out all his hidden signals

First, let's talk about the most obvious and most noticeable signs that guys give us - yes, not only girls are engaged in this activity. The only difference is that we do this consciously, and men sometimes don’t even control their actions towards the fair sex, which is what they show themselves to be. Think well, maybe everything is clear without any hidden signs

? If a guy devotes a lot of time to you, is constantly near you, starts the conversation himself and gives a lot of compliments

- these are obvious signs of sympathy. Does it seem like nothing could be simpler? But no: many girls simply cannot immediately accept such luck, so they do not take signs of sympathy seriously. But if everything is not so obvious, the next part of the article is for you.

Admire his hobbies

First, you need to delve into his interests. Humble men usually don't rush from one thing to another, they focus on something important to them. Well, for example, he loves dogs, as a rule, more than people. He lets them into his circle of trust.

Why don't you admire his fox terrier? He is funny, sweet, affectionate. Apparently, his owner raised him to be so good-natured. Look at how many reasons there are to get closer and compliment a man.

But even modest people love compliments, although they react to it with blush on their cheeks and an embarrassed smile. Well, how to admire a shy man in words - read the article How to compliment a man.

You don't have to get a puppy right away, you can just do the following:

Ask him to take you to a dog show - you wouldn’t dare to go on your own, but you really want to do it with an expert.
Ask to walk his dog together - you need evening walks, but you don’t like to do it alone.
Offer yourself to him as a nanny for his dog when he needs to go somewhere for a long time.

This way you can quickly win him over:

you love animals, which means you are a kind soul;
you are also lonely and ask him to keep you company;
you are responsive and always ready to lend a helping hand.

But it can't just be a dog. If any of his hobbies, even strange ones, arouses your keenest interest and admiration, then he will be ready to give you the first key to his heart. Especially if this is a work colleague - then it’s easier to figure out how he lives. Read about this in the article How to understand that a colleague likes you.

Unacceptable things to do when communicating with a timid guy

When communicating with a modest guy, it is important to remember that he is a vulnerable person, so you should not further injure his pride. If a guy is very shy, a harsh voice and a raised voice will simply scare him away. People prone to timidity categorically cannot stand shouting and withdraw into themselves if this happens.

A modest guy who is embarrassed to even talk to a woman is sensitive to all sorts of ridicule, so before you joke, think about whether this will hurt his pride. A timid man may have a wonderful sense of humor, but ridicule directed at him will be unpleasant and incomprehensible to him.

You should also avoid criticism, especially sharp and incorrect criticism. Modest guys have a very hard time when they are judged and their shortcomings are pointed out, so it is better to avoid such moments. The best option would be a subtle hint that the guy is doing something wrong, but there should be no derogatory criticism.

Another important trait is not to ask a shy person about his feelings. A woman who is distinguished by wisdom will herself understand that the chosen one is interested in her, even if the man is withdrawn. Asking a timid man directly what he feels for the lady of his heart is an impossible task and sometimes useless: his shy nature simply will not allow him to be straightforward with his chosen one.

To build a relationship with a shy person, you need to show patience, tact and respect, and then the timid guy will certainly become bolder and be able to make his beloved happy.

How to get a shy guy to talk

Of course it's interesting! If you are reading my story, then how to talk to a shy person. Find tips on how to get an embarrassed guy to talk:

6.1. Find out the guy's interests

Choose topics that interest the guy. If you see a book club badge on a backpack, ask why the guy is wearing the badge and everything related to a topic that interests him. Further topics about books and heroes will come up. An uncomfortable conversation will become a friendly conversation. It is important to stop asking questions that require a detailed, complete answer. It will be easier to carry on a conversation, the object of adoration will be able to relax.

6.2. Start by dancing and touching each other

We decided to meet at a party where he is standing, bored - in this case, invite him to dance, spend time together. If the guy is shy, there will be no refusal. When you are close, you can start a conversation, touch each other, feel the warmth. Take him by the hands. Feel his hand in yours.

6.3. Use compliments

Start with praise and admiration. Start a dialogue: “I thought there wasn’t a person at the university who read or was interested in Stephen Covey. I am sincerely glad to have the opportunity to communicate with a like-minded person. My name is Katya. Your name?" Girls, especially do not confuse praise with flattery. Give compliments sincerely, from the heart. A shy guy is pleased to hear kind words, he will blossom and become more confident.

Reasons why guys like modest girls

There is an opinion that a modest and shy girl will make an ideal wife. First of all, a modest woman does not like to attract everyone's attention to herself, thereby she will not provoke outbursts of jealousy in her boyfriend. In addition, it is believed that modest representatives of the fair sex prefer leisurely evenings at home with reading a book and baking a pie to going to a club and noisy gatherings until the morning. This cannot but please a serious young man, oriented towards home comfort. Modest women are indifferent to shopping - this rather controversial thesis is put forward by men who consider modest girls very attractive. In addition to saving money, which the flighty beauty will certainly spend on dresses, shoes, stockings, the modest woman will also devote all her free time to something more useful - study, work, arranging her home, finally.

The decisive argument in choosing a life partner, which is made between more and less modest girls, is the fact that often modest girls remain virgins for a long time. Thus, there is a high probability that you will be the first and only man with your chosen one, which, of course, cannot but flatter a man’s pride.

What to do in such situations

The main thing is not to get upset. There is no need to change yourself for someone else, the most important thing is to be yourself. But still, some tips on what to do that is useful.

For a girl (what NOT to do when communicating with a modest guy)

To avoid scaring off a shy man, you need to follow a few tips.

No need to rush. Don't force a guy to make the first move. When the time comes, if he really has feelings, everything will work out. You can, of course, give a man a little hint about your feelings to increase his confidence. For example, ask for help at work. With a feeling of satisfaction, the boy's confidence will increase.
There is no need to deliberately put the guy in an awkward position and cause negative emotions. It's better to be modest. This is a method of psychological mirroring: if a man imitates the character or actions of another person, it means that he cares and is seen as a potential partner. A shy man alone with a seemingly insecure girl will worry less and, over time, communication will improve.
Under no circumstances should you laugh at him. It is better to try to show your sincere attitude. If you really like a young man, you should not hide your willingness to come to his aid. You must let him know that you are interested in further communication. Shy people are so perceptive that they subconsciously begin to approach the sincere person.

Important: under no circumstances should you laugh at a man, especially when surrounded by his friends or colleagues. This way you can undermine his reputation and interest in women.

To a man

The man should also try to correct the situation. For example:

Try to take more initiative. Don't be afraid to show leadership qualities. In any case, the main thing is to start taking action, and the rest will follow.
If the reason for this behavior is inexperience, then you need to gain experience! Communication skills will not come without trial and error.
Don't follow guys who are more successful with women. Everyone is different and no two characters are the same. If a man takes longer to make the first move, that's okay.

Physical contact

When you have gotten to know each other well and your relationship has begun to develop quite successfully, then you need to resort to physical contact and touching. You don't have to rush at it, just try one of the following ideas.

Don't expect a shy guy to take your hand first. Instead, be the first to take his hand the next time you walk around the city.
Place your hand on his knee or rest your head on his shoulder while you watch a movie together.
Adjust the collar of his shirt.
Share food with him. Even taking French fries from the same plate is a sign of intimacy.
Kiss him when the time comes.
Get creative to get physical contact. If you are interested in this person, then you must be willing to take the initiative. For what? Because you need to convince a man that you really like him. Show him how natural and easy it is to be intimate, and he will become more confident.

How to know if your husband is in love

How to understand that your spouse has fallen in love with another woman? The behavior of a married man in love is impossible not to notice. A wife should think about it if her husband suddenly:

began to take care of the neatness of his appearance and buy new things for himself;
changed perfume;
began to stay late at work;
is often in a thoughtful state, often in moments of reflection his face is illuminated with a smile;
set a password on your phone and personal computer;
does not take his wife to corporate events.

The combination of these signs may indicate the appearance of sympathy on the other side. If marriage is dear to you, then you urgently need to take measures so that simple love does not become the reason for the breakup of the family.

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Analysis of the negative

Carefully analyzing negative situations will only make your shyness worse. Try to immediately analyze everything that happened, draw conclusions and move on without looking back. If it makes you feel better, write down everything that happened. Analyze your emotions and actions, think about what you will do next time in order to avoid such embarrassment.

Perceive the world philosophically, try to be positive, act decisively and don’t give up. You will definitely succeed, and even much faster than you plan.

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