Misandry - what is it, a lifestyle of strong women or a pathological state of the psyche?

In modern society, where the feminism movement is becoming increasingly popular, there is also an extremely negative attitude towards men, called misandry. The main problem for women is uncontrollable disgust and even aggression towards male representatives, which is difficult to cope with without the involvement of specialists. Those around them do not understand and do not accept this behavior; those suffering from misandry will not be able to build a full-fledged family.

Misandry - what is it, a lifestyle of strong women or a pathological state of the psyche?

• 1.What is meant by misandry and its main manifestations 1.1.Manifestation of misandry in women
• 1.2.Manifestation of misandry in men

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History of feminism

In the 1830s in the United States, women advocated for the emancipation of their rights in society. They wanted to have the right to vote, protection from violence, get an education, and engage in politics. The first person to speak out for women's rights in America was Abigail Smith Adams. Her famous quote - “We will never submit to laws in which we did not participate, and to an authority that does not represent our interests” - has gone down in history.

In Europe, feminism began to develop only in 1918, when women received the right to vote. This was followed by permission to study at universities and stand at the machine in production. At the same time, the first supporters of reverse racism appeared

When women suppressed disenfranchisement, they did not escape discrimination. They continued to be discriminated against, despite the letter of the law. Then feminists came up with the concept of sexism. It clearly reflected what was happening - women earned less than men, household chores were their only prerogative. Oppressed and dissatisfied with their position, they began to hate men as representatives of the sex.

Modern feminism has lost its historical significance. Instead of fighting for rights, feminists call for the destruction of men as a biological species and use violence against them. The law is often on the side of girls, so they feel impunity and superiority. Hypertrophied feminism is called misandry.

Types of misogyny

Various types of misogyny can be observed from almost all people in the Russian Federation, even from women themselves. This phenomenon is too ingrained in society.

Misogyny can be expressed in different ways.

Have you ever encountered examples of misogyny in your life? Do you use misogynistic phrases, expressions, jokes? Share your experience in the comments.

Additionally, we invite you to watch a video about misogyny between a mother and her daughter.

The extremes of sexism

Sexism is gender discrimination. The term implies the humiliation of a person based on gender. There is also the concept of anti-sexism, which means fighting against any manifestation of gender discrimination.

Since the term was coined by feminists, it was long believed that sexism only applied to women who were captured by the following stereotypes:

• a woman driving is a danger to society;
• the only right places for a girl are the maternity hospital and the kitchen;
• woman is the weaker sex;
• girls cannot work where a sharp mind is needed;
• a woman should always be beautiful and bring a good mood.

Gradually, stereotypes against women developed into open humiliation. This is how misogyny was introduced to the world.

Misogyny is hatred towards women. It manifests itself in a negative attitude towards the female sex in general or towards individual psychological and physical characteristics.

During antiquity, the ancient Greeks had the right to sell their women. Even then, some peoples had misogynistic attitudes. A woman could be disposed of like a thing. Such treatment forced female representatives to take extreme measures. Girls used violence against men and killed them. It was important for women to dominate the stronger sex, infringing on their rights and freedom.

It turns out that misandry and misogyny are two extreme positions of sexism. They are similar in that both of these concepts carry hatred. In the eyes of those who spread discrimination, machismo and feminine characteristics, gender is a sufficient reason for humiliation.

Misogyny - what is it?

Misogyny is hatred of women, antipathy, misogyny (Dictionary of Foreign Terms of the Russian Language).

The term misogyny in Russia and other countries has been discussed relatively recently, but it has existed in culture for a long time.

Misogynists have started to emerge due to the predominantly patriarchal culture in society. Women were assigned the role of a powerless being who should be behind a man, hence the hatred.

Definition of the concept

Misandry (from Greek μῖσος hatred and ἀνήρ man, emphasis on the last “and”) - dislike of the male sex, hatred, discrimination against men based on gender.

Manifestations of discrimination

The signs of a man-hater are essentially symptoms of misandry. These include mistrust, embarrassment, hysteria, and prejudice. Murder and violence against men are considered to be the most striking manifestations of the disease.

Mistrust

An implicit sign of misandry that a woman cannot determine on her own is doubt in a man’s words and actions. When the credit of trust is undermined at least once, the woman begins to suspect the man of all sins. If he came home late or did not call at the appointed time, the girl loses peace and sleep. It begins to seem to her that he no longer loves her, and that now he is spending time with someone else.

Unnecessary embarrassment

A feeling that a woman may experience in the presence of a man. She avoids eye contact with the opposite sex and protests against physical contact.

Hysteria

Misandry manifests itself more strongly when a woman falls into hysteria in the company of a man. Panic attacks and anxiety begin, she may suddenly scream at the young man and even use physical force.

Prejudice

Showing misandry, female bosses do not hire men. Even the fact that they violate the labor code does not stop them. There are areas in the labor market that are designed for women. For example, men have problems finding employment as accountants or educators.

At the end of 2021, a cafe appeared in St. Petersburg where men are not allowed. There is an opinion that its founder simply played on the “hype”, attracting attention and customers to the establishment. Although at the presentation of the restaurant the girl said that she wanted to create a space in which women would be free from harassment.

In 2015, a video about male lawlessness, “Misandry. A film about androcide (destruction of men).” The director of the film was Roman Alexandrov. The film was not shown in theaters because it did not receive enough funding. The viewers of the film were men. And many of them admitted that the film has a lot in common with the truth. On the Kinopoisk website the film was given 3 stars.

The film talks about misandry as the main problem of modern men. According to the author of the picture, androcide is a cancerous tumor on the body of a healthy society. The consequence of this state of affairs may be the complete degeneration of the nation.

On February 7, 2021, the Russian representative office of Reebok launched an advertisement with the slogan “Change from the needle of male approval to a male face.” Feminists reacted calmly to the advertisement and turned the incident into humor. Radical feminists felt that the slogans offended their feelings and were very unhappy.

Causes

Misogyny is not a congenital pathology; it is not inherited. Sometimes women do not understand why they feel antipathy towards men. There are those who clearly know the reasons for this phenomenon.

Childhood trauma

In dysfunctional families, husbands often humiliate and beat their wives. The child becomes an involuntary witness to conflicts. A girl who grows up in such a family projects the situation onto herself and her future.

Her father becomes the standard of male behavior for her. The only man in a girl’s life, who by the very fact of his existence should love the baby, always mocks her mother, sometimes at herself, or leaves the family. And now the child thinks that any man she has to live with will be the same. She prefers not to get involved with the opposite sex, internal antipathy grows and strengthens.

Violence

According to statistics, the number of men convicted of rape is 0.5% of the total number of offenses. Of these, 4-5% are called “random” or “street”. Such crimes are considered to be instigated by the victim. The victims report the incident to the police.

More than 9,000 people have gotten rid of their psychological problems using this technique.

It turns out that 95% of victims experience domestic violence. Such rapes are rarely reported. And if they report, the case does not always go to court. It often happens that after an incident a girl turns into a houseplant. If the victim still manages to come to her senses, then there is a high probability that she will become a supporter of misandry.

In countries professing Islam, violence against a woman is not considered a criminal offense at all.

Victims of violence are accused of provoking a man to rape. This concept is called victim blaming. On August 22, 2014, a note was published on the Progorod.ru forum about two young men accused of gang rape. The girl voluntarily came to visit one of the guys, drank with them, and then what happened happened. In the comments to the post, most users blamed the victim for the incident.

The very fact of rape, whether it is domestic or not, forever undermines the mental state of a woman. Girls subjected to victim blaming are acutely worried about what happened. A feeling of disgust and hatred towards men develops, because it was the male representative who became the cause of undermined psychological health.

Deception and betrayal

When the novel just begins, what is happening seems like a fairy tale. A man gives flowers, reads poetry in the rain, love is born and a family is created. Everyday life breaks the idyll in a couple. There is a separation. Painfully experiencing a breakup, the girl becomes withdrawn towards men. It seems to her that any man who appears again in life will also leave her.

50% of marriages break up in the first year of marriage. Families struggle with pregnancy. Abandoned women perceive what happened even more acutely.

In the US state of Michigan, a boy was killed by his own mother. During the interrogation, the woman was asked why she got rid of the child so cruelly. She justified it this way: “He was born a boy, and I hate men.”

Fashion

Feminism has been a buzzword lately. More and more women want to be involved in this movement. However, they do not fully understand what this status means. They just like to be independent. The consequence of such misunderstanding is misandry.

Mila Levchuk, a guru of family relationships, author of the lecture “How to become a plus woman,” has become a controversial person on the Internet. In her lessons, she says that a woman’s true destiny is to be a man’s inspiration, his muse. She believes that a man who is not able to satisfy all women’s whims is not worthy of the title “real”.

Under the influence of such words, girls divorced their “unworthy” husbands en masse. They walked towards a bright future, confident that there they would definitely meet a “real man.” Women remained alone for a long time and blamed men for everything - their ex-husbands, who did not live up to their expectations.

In popular social networks (Instagram, Vkontakte), debates about the harassment of women do not stop. Pregnant women are not given a seat in transport, the government does not offer benefits and various privileges to mothers, women with small children or of childbearing age are hardly hired. And men are to blame for everything.

If in the portrait of such a mother lies a woman abandoned by her father, and subsequently by her husband, this explosive mixture is concentrated misandry. A girl who has experienced so much humiliation and pain from a man is sure that there is no reason to love the stronger sex, they need to be destroyed and hated.

The threat of misogyny to relationships

Misogyny prevents people from building strong, harmonious, trusting relationships. Often, because of this phenomenon, relationships turn into abuse:

1. A misogynistic man does not consider it necessary to ask for forgiveness and never repents of his actions.
2. The girl stops believing in herself and increasingly tries on the image of a victim.
3. A man strives to control his wife in everything.
4. Doesn't consider her a full-fledged partner in a relationship, puts her in dependent roles.

You need to fight misogyny, change your own behavior and way of thinking.

Misandry in men

Misandry in men manifests itself in increased demands on themselves and members of their own sex. Women's problems with male misandry are placed above their own. A young man justifies violence against men. The misandrick accuses himself of not meeting the concept of a “real man.”

If a boy was brought up in conditions of patriarchy, but does not share its views, he begins to think that he is to blame for this, that he is “wrong.” With age, a man-hater begins to project these beliefs onto other men and condemn them. In the most extreme cases, a man believes that even being born in this body was a sin.

“To me, feminism means that you don’t let your gender define who you are – you can be whoever you want, whether you’re a man, a woman, a boy, a girl – it doesn’t matter. You can be who you think you are, and you should have that opportunity.”

Joseph Gordon-Levitt

FAQ

The following are answers to questions that arise in people thinking about the topic of sexism.

How do people use sexism to their advantage?

For some, sexism is a way to achieve the goal of self-affirmation. Someone is simply mired in it and does not even realize the destructiveness of the phenomenon. Psychologists note that often the goal, if there is one, is precisely self-affirmation. Sometimes sexist attitudes are used for educational purposes. Examples: “You shouldn’t want to be an engineer, you’re a girl”; “You shouldn’t be interested in coloring books, you’re a boy.”

What is the difference between sexism and patriarchy?

These are completely different concepts. We have already figured out what sexism is. Let's define patriarchy. This is a form of social organization where the man is the moral authority, the owner of property, and has a leading position in everything. Sexism is an ideology. Although sometimes there are opinions about the closeness of sexism to patriarchy and matriarchy, their comparison and identification is not always fair.

Should you do anything if you are sexist?

Yes. Accept yourself and accept other people's rights to the life they want to live. If sexism causes inconvenience or a feeling of moral discomfort, try consulting a psychologist. Self-analysis does not always lead to positive results, but it is worth a try. The main thing is the desire to get rid of false prejudices.

Can a woman be sexist?

Yes, but sexists are rare. You can learn about the essence of discrimination against men by women from the article.

Ways to combat misandry

Misandry is a disease. It ruins a woman's quality of life. It is important to recognize the problem and consult a doctor at the first symptoms. Now there are specialized centers for providing psychological assistance. To treat misandry, scientific methods of behavioral (behavioral) and cognitive psychotherapy are used.

Behavioral psychotherapy

The use of behavioral psychotherapy does not involve the patient describing his feelings and emotions. On the contrary, in this treatment the emphasis is on minimal penetration into the internal state of the individual. Therapy is carried out according to the following scheme:

1. Functional analysis. During the appointment, the doctor asks a series of questions that will help conduct a behavior analysis. They are compiled by a psychologist based on the essence of the patient’s problem. Sometimes the initial assessment stage takes from one to six months.
2. Implementation. From this moment the training of implemented behavioral skills begins. The patient, who has answered the questions himself and identified the problem, begins to artificially incorporate skills into everyday life that can change the philosophy of his behavior. For example, a girl always fell into a state of hysteria when communicating with a man. While working through this problem, at a moment close to a breakdown, she forces herself to stop and continue communication in a calm tone.
3. Completion. Therapy is considered successful and can be completed when a balanced conversation without panic and screaming becomes the norm for the patient. She no longer makes efforts to smooth out the situation. Everything happens by itself.

After behavioral therapy, the patient becomes his own psychologist. In the process of treatment, he studies his reactions to irrational behavior. By returning to the plan that was drawn up during therapy, a person can independently cope with the problem.

Cognitive therapy

With this type of therapy, attention is paid to the patient’s internal state, his desires and thoughts. Treatment involves communication with a psychologist.

The main goals of cognitive therapy are to understand the influence of the patient’s thoughts on behavior and emotions. You need to identify negative thoughts that are out of control and observe them. Psychotherapy is carried out in several stages:

1. Diary of thoughts. In the first stage, the patient independently writes down his thoughts and worries. This helps him track what he thinks about most often during the day. Based on these notes, the doctor makes a list of negative thoughts.
2. Distance. The patient, together with the doctor, determines that a particular thought causes a negative impact on the internal state. Also, all the pros and cons of this idea are presented on paper and its reassessment is carried out.
3. Replacement. This stage of therapy is considered final. This is where negative emotions are replaced with positive ones. The patient is asked not to return to irrational thoughts and change his attitude towards what happened. For example, if a person suffered a difficult childhood, they find positive aspects in this, namely: “It was a school of life, I became emotionally resistant to pain, and every hour my psyche becomes stronger.”
4. Action plan. Compiled after completion of therapy. It will help to overcome oneself if destructive thoughts begin to return to the patient.

To achieve quick and high-quality results, behavioral and cognitive therapies are carried out together.

Does the Reputation Institute still work?

The institution of reputation is underdeveloped in Russia, but nevertheless it is a necessary and important tool in the fight against social injustice.

At first glance, the case of Regina Todorenko can be considered as a successful example of the work of the institution of reputation: this is exactly that rare situation when public criticism and reaction to the unacceptable actions of a well-known, high-status person led to real sanctions and reputational losses, forced her to think, admit her mistake and change behavior. Such cases are extremely important as a precedent; they become a signal for other stars and organizations that manifestations of aggression, violence or discrimination do not pass without a trace - and can lead to serious resource and reputational losses. Unfortunately, we live in a world where a huge number of people and organizations broadcast and share discriminatory views, so public criticism and the risk of losing resources often become the only possible leverage.

The possibility of such impact in response to injustice is especially important for the most vulnerable social groups, which include, for example, women, survivors of violence, LGBT+ people, people with disabilities, migrants and other groups of people who are subject to systemic and everyday discrimination and whose rights are worse others are protected by laws.

But if you try to look at the situation with Todorenko from a slightly different angle, you will notice that this case is rather an exception to the rule than a universal precedent, telling us that the institution of reputation has finally started working. Despite all the irresponsibility, rudeness and incompetence of the TV presenter’s statements on the topic of domestic violence, these statements in general are not very different from those that other stars of Russian show business regularly make. And the harmful stereotypes about domestic violence and opinions that dominate our society often sound even worse than Todorenko’s in his controversial interviews. Obviously, this is far from the only media woman broadcasting such views. In addition to women, there are a huge number of media men who not only broadcast sexism and misogyny, but are themselves abusers and actors of violence, and are not subject to a significant share of the criticism that was addressed to Todorenko. Even her husband Vlad Topalov, who participated in the same program and left an approving comment a day later (“Bad boys for life!”) under his brother’s absolutely unacceptable post, did not simultaneously become the object of equally fierce condemnation.

The Todorenko case showed that it turns out that our society still has a considerable resource and potential for quickly mobilizing and exerting effective pressure on people who commit unacceptable actions or statements. But why has this resource still not been able to lead to reputational losses on the part of any high-status men who commit violence? A striking example: literally on the same days as Todorenko’s statements, the NTV channel broadcast a program in which the famous actor Marat Basharov admits that he systematically beat his wives. The information that Basharov is an abuser has been public for many years, however, this did not cause any large-scale public protest and did not lead to reputational losses for the actor. (In the process of preparing this material, a petition appeared on the Internet demanding that Marat Basharov be deprived of the State Prize of the Russian Federation and the title of Honored Artist of the Republic of Tatarstan. The text of the petition also draws attention to the imbalance of criticism towards Todorenko and Basharov.)

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Preventive measures

To eradicate discrimination, racism and other manifestations of misanthropy, including misandry, it is necessary to start with education and stop instilling in the child that he is only one way and cannot be anything else. It is necessary to explain that all people are good and every person has the right to exist, regardless of gender, nationality and skin color.

If a child encounters manifestations of discrimination during socialization, you need to try to translate what he hears into humor. We must again convey to him that if a person is different, this does not mean that he needs to be humiliated, treated with contempt and spoil his own karma.

If you don’t want to give up and are ready to really, and not in words, fight for your full and happy life, you may be interested in this article .