What is hypocrisy in simple words: 7 examples of two-faced people


Hypocrisy is a style of behavior that implies insincerity, hiding real emotions, thoughts and inner states. The meaning of the word hypocrisy originates in the Roman Empire, when actors taking part in theatrical performances used a variety of masks that reflected the emotional state of the character. This phenomenon should not always be condemned and condemned. Every individual has had a situation in life in which they had to hide the truth from their interlocutor, lie and use “sweet lies” instead of “bitter truth.”

What forces a person to hypocrisy is mainly fear. And in overwhelming situations, this is a fear of one’s opinion or perception of reality, which is caused by low self-esteem. Therefore, when the interlocutor is a hypocrite, and this can be revealed simply through gestures, intonation, and facial expression, you should not immediately be offended by the speaker’s lies. If this person is truly dear, you should understand his fear, realizing what caused it, and how you can change the situation with your actions.

To overcome such a personality trait as hypocrisy, it is necessary to build rules of life and an unshakable system of principles. If an individual's behavior is based on values, such a person will have more control over his speech and actions, avoiding lies and weakness. A person with adequate self-esteem will not be ashamed of his point of view or worldview.

What is hypocrisy


It is convenient for a person to wear a mask behind which he hides his true state of mind.
Hypocrisy is a person’s tendency to change his opinion, wanting to benefit from it. Hypocrisy can also be a kind of manifestation of a person’s personal complexes.

Hypocrisy is the antonym of sincerity and is manifested in the fact that a person spreads rumors and gossip about his friends. The basis of this behavior is the survival instinct.

In psychology, this term denotes a person’s desire to hide his negative attitude towards one or another individual, or malicious intent, under an advantageous, socially approved mask.

In pedagogy, hypocrisy is understood as a low level of education. Famous teachers are convinced that with the right approach to education, a child will not grow up to be a hypocrite.


Communication between comrades based on lies and hypocrisy

Examples of hypocrisy

  1. Neighbors smile sweetly when they meet, but then talk nasty things behind their backs and spread gossip in order to discredit each other in the eyes of others.
  2. A man marries an unloved woman in order to obtain temporary housing or registration , but at the same time he tells his chosen one that he truly loves her.
  3. A company employee tells unpleasant things about his boss , but in private he curries favor with him.
  4. One spouse is cheating on the other and wants a divorce, but assures their life partner that they are still faithful to him or her.
  5. An example from fashion history: Levi Strauss , who made a lot of money selling his first jeans , never wore them . He believed that it was not the status of rich people to wear work clothes.

Differences and similarities of lies and hypocrisy

Duplicity has much in common with deception, but it is impossible to equate these negative personality traits. These two vices have both similarities and fundamental differences.

A deceiver lies to make his life easier. The hypocrite also lies, but he pursues another goal - obtaining benefits. In addition, a liar knows that he is behaving incorrectly, while a hypocrite sees nothing wrong in his actions. A deceiver tries to confirm his words with specific actions, which a hypocrite never does.

The similarity between a deceiver and a two-faced person is that neither one nor the other strives to be sincere with their communication partners. If exposed, these people will try to justify themselves and reduce everything to a banal misunderstanding.

Asya Rakhovich

Psychologist with more than 8 years of experience. Consultant on interpersonal and marital relationships, self-discovery.

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Who are you pretending to be?

“And when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, who love to stand and pray in the synagogues and on street corners, so that they may appear before people. Truly I say to you, they are already receiving their reward” (Matthew 6:5).

Are you pretending to be righteous? Do you pretend to pray when you don't even believe that God is there in that situation? Do you pretend to be happy with others when you yourself are filled with jealousy and rivalry? Do you pretend to trust God, while you yourself are simply consumed by fear? Do you pretend to care about other people just to get them to like you?

Types of hypocrisy

Since a negative personality trait manifests itself differently in different people, in the course of experimental studies, scientists tried to distinguish between the typical behavior patterns of hypocrites. Psychologists classify duplicity as follows:

  1. Moral duplicity. Such a person strives to make a positive impression on others, he is vain. The individual ascribes to himself moral qualities that he does not possess, talks about sublime deeds, presenting himself as a hero, although in reality he has never committed them. There are not always evil intentions behind such behavior; sometimes such a hypocrite simply cannot find the strength to behave differently.
  2. Moral weakness. This type is based on weak moral principles of the individual. Such people tend to justify their unseemly actions by a coincidence of circumstances, by the lack of opportunity to act differently.
  3. Duality of standards. An individual with this form of hypocrisy does not see anything wrong in his actions. However, he condemns similar actions of others. A hypocrite with double standards will always find an excuse for his unseemly behavior, but he will never accept the excuses of those around him.

History of the term

Even during the primitive communal system, people learned to be hypocrites. Scientists are sure that the hypocritical instinct is inherent in humans by nature. Of course, this behavioral feature appeared earlier than the special term by which this personal quality was called.

The term for this personality trait originated in Ancient Rome. At that time, girls playing various roles in the theater were called hypocrites. In a literal sense, this word meant “to try on different faces, to appear in different images, to wear a mask.”


The roots of hypocrisy should be sought in ancient theatrical art

The Greeks also had the word “hypocrisy”, using which they wanted to say that a person was behaving artificially, pretending.

Now this term denotes such human behavior in which a clear contradiction is revealed between his external actions and personal beliefs. Synonymous concepts for this personality trait are:

  • falsehood - insincerity in behavior, falsity (the term is used in psychology when there is a need to indicate the discrepancy between a person’s words and his facial reactions);
  • guile is a negative character trait, expressed in the fact that a person displays cunning, flattery, and intrigue when communicating with loved ones;
  • pretense – conscious actions of a person aimed at misleading interlocutors;
  • hypocrisy is a demonstrative model of pious behavior of an individual who in reality does not follow religious principles and does not show piety in everyday life;
  • deception – deliberate concealment of true information, distortion of facts;
  • two-facedness is a psychological strategy of human behavior in which the words and actions of an individual diverge from his personal beliefs.

Notes

  1. ↑The first explanatory Big Encyclopedic Dictionary. - St. Petersburg, M.: Ripol-Norint, 2006. - P. 967. - 4000 copies. — ISBN 5-7711-0207-5.
  2. Kon I.
    “Dictionary of Ethics”
    (undefined)
    . "National Encyclopedia of Philosophy" (1981). Archived from the original on April 17, 2013.
  3. Golovin S. Yu.
    “Dictionary of a practical psychologist”
    (undefined)
    . "National Encyclopedia of Psychology" (1998). Access date: October 21, 2007.
  4. ↑Hypocrisy: how to calm your conscience (Festinger Experiments)
  5. ↑Festinger, 1962.
  6. ↑Festinger, 1964.
  7. ↑Why Don't Moral People Act Morally? Motivational Considerations by C. Daniel Batson and Elizabeth R. Thompson (2001)
  8. ↑Moral Hypocrisy, Moral Inconsistency, and the Struggle for Moral Integrity by Benoît Monin and Anna Merritt (2012)
  9. ↑The Immoral Assumption Effect: Moralization Drives Negative Trait Attributions by Peter Meindl, Kate M. Johnson, and Jesse Graham (2014) (unspecified)
    (unavailable link). Retrieved March 16, 2021. Archived June 27, 2021.
  10. ↑The dark side of creativity: original thinkers can be more dishonest by Gino, F., & Ariely, D. (2012) (unspecified)
    (unavailable link). Retrieved March 16, 2021. Archived June 27, 2021.
  11. ↑When Values ​​and Behavior Conflict: Moral Pluralism and Intrapersonal Moral Hypocrisy by Jesse Graham, Peter Meindl, Spassena Koleva, Ravi Iyer, and Kate M. Johnson (2015) ( unspecified)
    (unavailable link). Retrieved March 16, 2021. Archived June 27, 2021.
  12. ↑Moral hypocrisy: Social groups and the flexibility of virtue by Valdesolo, P., & DeSteno, D. (2007)
  13. ↑Effects of anger, guilt, and envy on moral hypocrisy by Polman, E., & Ruttan, R.L. (2012)
  14. 1234
    Ali-zade, 2007.
  15. ↑an-Nisa 4:145
  16. ↑an-Nisa 4:142, 143
  17. ↑ al-Mujadilah 58:14
  18. ↑Al-Ahzab 33:60, 61
  19. ↑an-Nisa 4:140
  20. ↑al-'Ankabut 29:10, 11
  21. ↑an-Nisa 4:141
  22. at-Tirmidhi.
    Iman, hadith No. 14 // Jami at-Tirmidhi.

Who is a hypocrite in simple words

A hypocrite is a two-faced individual who lacks sincerity in his judgments and views. Such a person tries to hide his own immoral actions under good intentions. But the hypocrite will condemn similar immoral actions of those around him.

A hypocrite in life tries to appear to be someone he really is not.

Two-faced people are rightfully considered manipulators. After all, they know where the interlocutor’s weak point is, therefore, wanting to achieve their goal, they blackmail, play on feelings and prejudices.

Freedom to be yourself

“But I revealed my sin to You and did not hide my iniquity; I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the Lord,” and You have taken away from me the guilt of my sin” (Psalm 31:5).

There is a special kind of freedom visible here: the freedom that comes from being oneself. This is why many of us love to lounge around at home in our favorite pajamas: we feel relaxed when we are ourselves, with minimal fear of rejection or judgement.

Signs of a hypocrite

You can recognize a hypocrite by their characteristic behavior patterns. Hypocrites have the following characteristics:

  • a hypocritical person promises a lot and does little (but at the same time reacts painfully to the failure to fulfill promises given to him);
  • a two-faced person is well versed in social psychology, knows how to sense the mood of his interlocutor and skillfully plays along with him;
  • such people love to brag, they are characterized by vanity (such people often invent reasons for boasting, because they have very few actual personal achievements);
  • a hypocritical person ingratiates himself with successful people through deception and flattery (they are driven by banal envy);
  • they are often confused in their own lies, so they can present different texts of the same story (they do not feel remorse when a contradiction in their words is pointed out to them, brushing off reproaches);
  • two-faced people do not know how to keep other people's secrets (but at the same time they condemn those who spread other people's secrets);
  • It is difficult for them to refrain from exaggerating facts and distorting information, even if they know that others can expose their deception;
  • two-faced people are not able to admit their guilt and ask for forgiveness from a person (therefore, as a rule, they do not have strong friendships that have been tested over the years);
  • two-faced people constantly criticize others, they tend to cling to any little things and shortcomings of others;
  • Such individuals cannot admit their own mistakes (when mistakes are pointed out to them, they get offended, and sometimes even completely and irrevocably break off relations with a straightforward person who decided to point out a flaw);
  • hypocritical people tend to collect and spread gossip and rumors (often they invent them themselves);
  • they do not respect simple straightforward people;
  • They tend to want to teach others, point out their mistakes and mistakes;
  • hypocrites are sensitive to criticism (which is why they often have tense relationships with their superiors);
  • such individuals strive to evoke pity and sympathy, they often put pressure on feelings in the process of interpersonal communication;
  • true hypocrites will not say something good about a person if he is not nearby at the time of the conversation, since they are not able to truly admire successful individuals and their talents;
  • a person who is accustomed to being a hypocrite is in no hurry to come to the rescue in a difficult situation (he justifies himself by saying that he does not have the required skills, capabilities, and is also confident that at a critical moment there will certainly be someone else next to the person in need who can provide help) ;
  • if he is approached with a request, he immediately remembers urgent matters, declaring that he would certainly help, but now he needs to run;
  • he can offer his help if he is sure that the person will refuse it, but he will not be particularly zealous in this, fearing that the person will suddenly change his position;
  • When helping someone, they expect gratitude and benefits, so they will certainly remind you for a long time about the service provided.

External signs also reveal a hypocrite:

  • when he smiles, there are no facial folds on his face;
  • when he smiles, his eyes remain sharp, cold, indifferent;
  • during communication, his eyebrows remain motionless;
  • he compresses his lips tightly;
  • in the process of communication, the hypocrite’s posture is usually closed;
  • often his hands make uncontrolled movements.

To learn to accurately identify hypocritical people in one’s own environment, a person needs to develop his emotional intelligence.

How to react to a hypocritical person?


The speech of a lying and hypocritical person

You should never condemn such a person, because everyone can remember a situation in their life when they tried to hide their sincere feelings from their interlocutor. It’s not for nothing that they say that “the whole world is a stage and the people in it are actors.”

Most often, people act hypocrites out of fear. They have low self-esteem, so they are afraid that they are not good enough, that they do not know how to do something, that they have not achieved great heights. Therefore, they boast and attribute various skills and abilities to themselves.

A person is also a hypocrite because he does not feel safe. You just need to behave carefully with such people, and not tell him the details of your personal life. On the contrary, try to get him into a frank conversation, so you will understand why he does this.

In addition, unexpected questions can throw anyone off balance, so most likely he will begin to behave naturally.

There are, of course, dangerous hypocrites who lie in order to gain profit. He puts himself in the best light, trying to achieve his goal. And sometimes people simply do not have life values, they themselves do not understand where their sincere “I” is and where the mask is. It is better to behave with such people using their own methods. This is how a person sees himself from the outside, and this can discourage him from engaging in such behavior in the future.

If you feel insincerity on the part of a close relative, then analyze what gave him a reason to behave this way. By speaking insincerely, a person may be protecting you, trying to avoid a scandal, or at this moment he simply needs your approval.

Always remember that most often lying is a defensive reaction. For this reason, do everything so that your loved one feels comfortable with you, change your actions towards him.

Characteristics of kinesthetics. How to communicate with kinesthetic learners?

Reasons for hypocrisy

Hypocrisy occurs in a person due to the following reasons:

  • excessive demands on the child from parents, unfair and cruel methods of education;
  • unconscious copying of parents' behavior patterns by children;
  • low self-esteem of the individual;
  • self-interest, the desire to obtain material benefits, benefits;
  • evil intentions of the individual;
  • low level of human upbringing caused by errors in education;
  • lack of a system of moral guidelines in humans;
  • fear of condemnation or punishment from influential people;
  • the desire to make your life easier, because it is not always easy and pleasant to tell people the truth;
  • the desire to please a friend, boss or business partner;
  • adolescence, during which a person tries on certain roles and masks;
  • the desire to make a good impression, to win over;
  • the desire to comply with the moral norms and rules of society;
  • a person’s desire to avoid conflicts and maintain friendly relations with superiors, colleagues, neighbors, and relatives;
  • the desire to avoid retribution for one’s actions;
  • fear of hurting the soul of a loved one;

Despite the fact that every person has the prerequisites for the development of a negative character trait, duplicity is not characteristic of everyone. If a boy or girl from childhood is accustomed to setting humane goals for themselves, their negative character traits will be under conscious control. A person with a high level of moral development will not allow himself to commit inhumane acts.

Duplicity, lies, pretense, hypocrisy

The phenomenon of duplicity has similarities with hypocrisy, lies and pretense. Paul Ekman, in his book The Psychology of Lying, explores the reasons for behavior involving lying. Author Fr. But in all likelihood, a lie is committed by a person with a greater degree of awareness than duplicity, which is a change of masks. It is much more difficult to recognize. Certain factors can give away a lie: voice, gaze, features of the vegetative-vascular system. With duplicity, everything is more complicated.

Pretense is a lack of sincerity and is similar to lying. Pretense is a more harmless concept than duplicity. The reason for pretending can be fear or shyness. Duplicity often presupposes a goal.

Duplicity and hypocrisy are character traits. Hypocrisy is characteristic even of the animal world (animals often use it as a defense). In our society, hypocritical behavior is common; modern psychology no longer considers it as unambiguously negative. Duplicity is the device of a hypocrite.

A distinctive sign of duplicity is the belief of others that a two-faced person is himself. It's hard not to believe this, because it really is true. But soon such a person will become completely different, and he will be himself again.

Pros and cons of hypocrisy

Hypocrisy does not always bring only harm to others and the two-faced person himself. This character trait also has a positive meaning.

Advantages and disadvantages

hypocrisy allows you to avoid sharp corners in a conversation;

this personality trait helps to avoid conflict;

Hypocrisy is used when one does not want to offend the interlocutor.

if a person is accustomed to being a hypocrite, he will not apologize, knowing that he has offended the person;

duplicity is characteristic of selfish people;

The hypocrite does not have strong friendships, since he is not capable of sincere positive feelings;

hypocrites are susceptible to developing diseases of the cardiovascular system;

they are often diagnosed with gastrointestinal disorders;

a hypocrite suffers from envy; it hinders him not only in the personal sphere, but also in the professional sphere.

Since hypocrisy has positive aspects, it means that people who have weakly expressed this character trait should develop it. To do this you need:

  • learn to smile in critical and conflict situations;
  • convince the suffering person that everything will be fine, all problems can be solved;
  • hide your negative emotions and those around you.


Each person decides for himself whether to be a hypocrite, focusing on the situation

Why people become hypocrites - top 5 reasons

Two-faced people usually deliberately choose to behave dishonestly. Why is this happening:

  1. Fear of punishment or condemnation. Often hypocrisy is formed in childhood. For example, parents scold and punish a first-grader for bad grades. After a while, he realizes that it is easier to lie. Then he begins to tear out pages from notebooks, hide the diary, and forge signatures. Over time, deceitful behavior becomes the norm for him, not only in the area of ​​academic performance.
  2. Reluctance to offend. Few people want to communicate with people who “cut the truth from the shoulder.” Circumstances sometimes require that a person behave as politely and tactfully as possible, and in some cases even lie.
  3. Least resistance. Not everyone is ready to accept the truth in its pure form. Conflicts often arise because of this, so people prefer to be soft and kind and avoid rough edges.
  4. Self-interest. Many people are hypocrites for their own benefit. In every situation in life, they want to look as cute as possible. To recognize a hypocrite, you should take a closer look at his behavior in various situations. For example, the headman ingratiates himself with the teachers in order to get good grades, and in their absence speaks rudely and unflatteringly about them. She is nice and courteous with the dean of the faculty, but she can be rude or even call her classmates.
  5. Following social norms. Many people want to become a full-fledged member of society and achieve respect. To get what you want, it is important to behave accordingly. If you think about it, even ordinary politeness, tact and subordination are types of hypocrisy.

Attitude towards hypocrisy in religion

In all religious teachings, hypocrisy is considered a sinful characteristic of man.

The Orthodox religion believes that hypocrisy came to man from the devil. To follow the righteous path, such an individual needs to cleanse his soul through confession, numerous services and prayers.

In Islam, hypocritical persons are called munafiks. They believe that the munafik does not deserve any benefits, since he is the “last man” in society.

The sacred scriptures of Judaism require the removal of hypocritical people from religion.

The moral foundations of any society are based on religious values. In Sunday schools, clergy encourage students to be merciful, sincere, and to show compassion for loved ones. That is why many teachers are convinced that the religious views of parents and their piety will contribute to the formation of a true citizen of society.

How to get rid of hypocrisy

To eradicate a negative character trait in yourself, you need to be patient. You can cope with it only with the help of a strong will. You need to start self-correction by recognizing the problem. The main method of eliminating a negative personality trait will be total self-control.

To overcome an unpleasant personality trait in yourself, you need to:

  1. Learn to enjoy life, enjoy communicating with different people.
  2. Instead of collecting gossip and rumors, you should engage in your own self-development and professional growth. The more personal achievements a person has, the less will be his need to invent them.
  3. Systematically engage in sports, yoga, meditation. Such activities transform not only the body, but also the soul.
  4. Communicate with those people who inspire admiration. Such people emanate positive energy, which transforms a person’s consciousness and personal attitudes.


It is very difficult to get rid of hypocrisy

How to disarm a hypocrite

To disarm a hypocrite you need to:

  • be natural in behavior and actions;
  • consciously form and protect your own system of life principles and values;
  • increase self-esteem;
  • adhere to strict consistency and logic in everyday actions and when performing professional duties;
  • be as honest as possible when communicating with friends, relatives and colleagues.

By engaging in self-improvement and cultivating moral principles in oneself, a person attracts positive people with high moral principles. Hypocrites do not choose such individuals as their victims.

Duplicity and personality

Personality is a set of certain qualities of an individual. Based on the semantics of the word, two-faced - having two faces. To understand how duplicity is formed, let’s touch on the concept of personality structure. Jung and Freud said that personality consists of the conscious, the unconscious and the collective unconscious. All complexes belong to the category of the unconscious; it can be assumed that duplicity too, since it is formed due to internal conflicts, fears and contradictions. Personal conflict occurs only within the individual; it is associated with the human psyche. Such conflict is the basis for changes in personality.

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