Female friendship: what is it, does it happen, the essence from the point of view of psychology

Hi all! Let's talk about female friendship. Let's figure out whether friendship between women really exists or is it just a myth?

There is a popular belief that female friendship does not exist, and this statement finds a lot of confirmation. In society, it is believed that friendship between a woman and a woman is built solely on a mercantile relationship. Allegedly, on a subconscious level, women continue to compete with each other: from buying clothes to getting married.

Friendship between women is shrouded in a considerable number of myths, but I will share with you the true truth, whether there is a female friendship built on emotional connection, sincerity, trust and honor.

Concept of friendship

In itself, friendship is considered as a type of relationship that does not depend in any way on gender, age and is based on trust. The foundation of relationships is considered to be common interests. Based on duration, friendship can be divided into short, long and situational.

In simple terms, friendship is a relationship between people who are ready to help each other, despite the situation, who are always ready to listen and sincerely support.

A friend is not called the friend who is nearby most of the time, but the one who listens to your problems, accepts you with your “cockroaches” and helps when it is in her power, although meetings with this girl do not occur as often as I would like to.

If you easily start a conversation about shopping, sports, relationships, children, etc., then a friendly connection has already formed between you.

INTRODUCTION

Modern empirical studies of friendly relations, within the framework of sociology, philosophy, psychology, show that friendship is a special type of interpersonal interaction, in contrast to friendship, characterized by high self-worth, boundless devotion, mutual love, mutual understanding, selflessness, depth and intimacy, selectivity and mutual sympathy.
In modern society, friendship refers to completely different types of social interactions. The most relevant in empirical studies of the phenomenon of friendship is the possibility of studying a person as a subject of interpersonal communication, endowed with freedom of choice and the right to be responsible for his actions. The attitude towards “one’s own” and “others”, awareness of the constructive and destructive constructs of personal relationships, motives and needs are the most important components of the internal, subjective world of the individual, which is revealed in full in the process of friendly communication, which determines the relevance of the chosen topic.

The object of research in this work is friendship as a psychological phenomenon.

The subject of research in this work is the psychological characteristics of friendship.

The purpose of this work is to study the psychological characteristics of friendship.

Based on the goal, within the framework of this work, the following tasks are proposed:

— studying the concept of “friendship” in psychology;

- identifying the functions of friendship;

— analysis of friendship as a form of interpersonal relationships;

— research of approaches to the study of psychological aspects of friendship;

— identification of psychological features of the formation of ideas of children of senior preschool age about each other and friendship;

— analysis of the problems of friendly relations in the system of modern interpersonal communications.

In this work, the following works were used in the field of studying the psychological characteristics of friendship: Avdulova T. P., Alberoni F., Andronnikova O. O., Gurevich P. S., Kletsina I. S., Koryagina N. A., Nikishova S. N., Osipova I. S., Rodina A. M., Chirkova T. I. et al.

The work used psychology textbooks, materials from scientific conferences and seminars on the topics studied, and materials from periodicals related to the study of friendship from the point of view of psychology.

Is female friendship real or not?

Despite the opinion of society, camaraderie between friends exists:

• It usually starts from school times;
• The existing relationship is good and does not interfere with the families of each of the friends;
• Both girls do not neglect to trust each other;
• Neither friend overloads the other with stories about her personal problems in life;
• They have similar characters and interests.

In fact, whether female friendship exists or not can only be determined by time, during which you will have to go through many trials that will either strengthen the relationship or, on the contrary, destroy it.

Types of girlfriends

A friend is an adviser

1. A vampire. Such a young lady will constantly need your help, complain about boredom, loneliness, and constantly wait for support. This will lead to conflicts brewing between you and your spouse.
2. Assistant. Will strive to provide help without demanding anything in return. Over time, he will begin to help with housework and take on part of the care for your family. My husband will not like the fact that there is always someone else in the house. Although it is not uncommon for a man to fall in love with his wife’s friend, who was constantly in front of his eyes, and did a better job around the house than her wife.
3. Advisor. Such a girl always knows what to do in one or another situation. She will constantly discuss your husband, criticize his actions, and try to open her eyes to his shortcomings. Do everything to make you disappointed in your loved one. In fact, she may be jealous of your happiness. When she sees how you suffer, she gets satisfaction (she doesn’t have such problems).

The answer to the question of whether there is a strong friendship between girls is negative. No, friendship is possible, the main thing is not to put your girlfriend in first place, leaving your husband in second, and secondly, always remain with your opinion, and not listen to your girlfriend’s every word.

Psychology of female friendship

Girls by nature have the ability to perceive the world around them with their senses. Through conversations and listening skills, strong friendships are built. On this basis, trust, grinding in, openness and many other qualities are formed, which are revealed differently in male friendship.

Because of the desire to maintain a warm, friendly relationship at any cost, it often results in an insincere relationship with a lack of attention. On this basis, a close friend in spirit can be annoying when communicating. If it benefits her, betray him. It happens, scandals often occur, but no matter what, she remains as a friend.

Competition3

Another reason why women cannot be friends is competition. From childhood, girls develop a certain trait of being better. than your desk neighbor or your mother’s friend’s daughter.

Already in adulthood, a woman develops a female instinct, when she a priori must be the best in order to be close to a brave male. Which, in turn, will provide her with safety and procreation.

Competition can disappear only at the moment when friends or just acquaintances have achieved a certain social status, material wealth, both got married successfully and live happily, they are completely satisfied with life. In this case, they simply have nothing to compete with, and sincere friendship can last quite a long time.

But even at a young age, when personal development is actively underway, close friends can often butt heads, as they try to reach certain heights and prove their success to a friend. How often can you hear stories about two friends vying for the same man? After all, their social circle, as a rule, is common. And when the guy made his choice in favor of one of his girlfriends, not a trace of friendship remained. Was she there at all?

Origins

There are often situations when friendship was formed in childhood, starting in kindergarten, then school, all the time together. After graduating from school, you enter different universities and travel to different cities, maintaining communication only by phone and via the Internet. After a certain period of time, a friend decides to come for a visit, and upon arrival you realize that this is a completely different person. You are overcome by a feeling of shame that you have become so cold towards a once close person and you begin to feel an obligation to imitate a good attitude towards your friend.

There is another version of the event - your friend constantly supported you, no matter what, even to the detriment of herself. It seemed to you that communication needed to be maintained, despite different views on life, interests, financial situation, etc. At your next meeting with a friend, you feel responsible for maintaining communication. Although, in reality, you don’t want to communicate with this person at all, you only talk about the past, since you have no desire to share the present.

How to build strong relationships

If you can treat a friend without subtext or prejudice, without demanding anything from her and allowing her to remain herself, you will most likely be able to build strong and long-term friendships. The main rules of close relationship:

• Identify a person with similar interests and goals.
• Do not demand anything from him in return and do not spare anything for him.
• Trust and be sincere.
• Learn to live without envy and enjoy your friend’s happy events.
• Carefully protect your privacy and space, not allowing your time to be occupied only by your friend.
• Stop complaining all the time. Strong communication does not depend on “whining” alone.
• Accept the personality as it is, without trying to impose your current view;

You shouldn't keep in touch just out of respect for the past. In your time, you were able to give a person everything that was expected of you. Going to meetings “out of politeness” means wasting your time on something you don’t like. You need to be able to change people in time to those who will open up new opportunities for you. A woman needs to go to sports, develop hidden talents, take part in trainings, take care of her appearance, and not drown in obligations to a loved one.

Why do friendships still persist between women?

The psychology of friendship between women is quite interesting, since friendship remains, even in the absence of interest in it on both sides. It is not at all necessary that the relationship contains violence against consciousness or a sense of duty. In most cases, it is expressed in banal benefits, we are not just talking about material ones, often it is expressed in spiritual self-affirmation at the expense of a friend.

• Providing assistance to achieve a sense of significance.
• Interest in communication due to the desire to be in company. It is much more pleasant and convenient to visit establishments with someone than alone.
• Keeping in touch until the guy arrives to avoid feelings of loneliness.
• A special group includes young mothers who desperately need to speak out.
• Some people want, at least in front of someone, to take off the mask and be themselves, while when they are in their family or among other people, they constantly have to pretend to be a completely different person.

According to practice, often a girl in a female company tries to assert herself and prove to herself that she is much better than her friends. Once such an opinion is reached, competition arises to find a worthy man.

Friendship arises through common interests (sports, music, work, hobbies), as soon as common interests disappear, friendship weakens significantly. The best time to make friends is considered to be student life. By this period, a person is already intelligent and formed, open to other acquaintances and receiving new emotions. Typically, girls who met friends at university maintain friendships for a longer period of time, since they were already conscientious people and overcame the difficulties of studying and other experiences together.

We all come from childhood,

and all our relationships with different people begin to form in childhood. Each of us remembers how carefree we played in the sandbox with other children in the yard or kindergarten. But among this noisy flock, we gradually developed a closer relationship with one girl. And now other children no longer matter: we go for a walk when our friend is walking, we play those games that we both like, we get bored when we can’t talk to her. This is how female friendship is born. Some people manage to carry it through their entire lives, while others outgrow it. Relationships between friends are tested by time and circumstances. And this is all good because by meeting and communicating with new people, we better understand ourselves, evaluate our new and old friends and our friendship.

Adaptation in society with the help of friends

Thanks to female friendship, it is much easier to establish relationships in society, assert oneself and begin to develop. Since male and female development differ significantly, therefore, in the company of similar girls, it is much easier to change. After all, a friend will be able to understand a lot when a guy friend considers an action or information devoid of logic.

When communicating, the main thing is to have emotional intimacy with a sensitive perception of it. This connection is the main difference between male friendship and female friendship. Men prefer to look for solutions to problems and explain and explain everything logically, while women’s conversations sometimes do not have a definite meaning.

The other side of female relationships includes scandals, intriguing conversations containing a lot of gossip. Typically, such communication is strongly expressed precisely in adolescence, when the personality is still being formed.

Girls can easily maintain a friendly relationship with a friend, even after a strong quarrel or betrayal. Girls who do not have many acquaintances try especially hard to maintain this kind of connection.

Emotional content of friendship4

Nature has given a woman the ability to deeply immerse herself emotionally in any exciting issue. For women who have friendship, communication is always filled with feelings and emotions. It is surprising that the main component of female friendship is not the solution to a specific issue, but the desire to discuss.

It is very important for any woman to be heard and receive support from her interlocutor. Unlike men's heart-to-heart conversations, women's communication has a pronounced emotional overtones. When communicating with a friend, a woman develops a trusting relationship and, above all, wants to see reciprocity.

Any friendship between two women can be compared to a tandem, in which one person takes a leading position and more often gives instructions and teachings. If the roles do not change, such a friendship can last quite a long time. If one of the girls decides to take on the role of a friend, there is a high risk of developing conflict and internal resentment. A random word, any action, a refusal or a request for help, etc. can serve to initiate a female friendship, as well as to end it.

Also, a frequent reason for a quarrel between friends can be unspoken news about something, even if it is not important. In this case, a complex of uselessness develops. Such cases often end with one of the friends completely ignoring the other, and without any explanation.

Women, by their nature, are terrible owners, and this rule applies not only to relationships with a man, but also to friendships with friends. If two girls secretly consider themselves friends and suddenly one of them does not invite the other to the company or prefers other communication, the other’s offense is inevitable.

It sounds strange, but often women’s conversations are filled with emptiness in terms of the fact that some truly significant and global things are not discussed by them. In turn, for women themselves, a heart-to-heart conversation with a friend can be compared to therapy. After all, during a conversation there is an emotional release from accumulated negativity.

From this point of view, friendship between women can be compared to the opportunity to stabilize one’s internal state. The desire to share problems and receive support in return is a definite link and warms up interest in communication between friends.

Psychologist's opinion on female friendship

This connection is similar to the one that occurs when a guy and a girl develop mutual sympathy, but excluding the sexual overtones. Girls who have formed such a friendship do not start a family, but at the same time they openly show interest in each other’s lives, openly demonstrate respect and provide support, always trying to help. In some cases, in such relationships one can see brighter and more colorful qualities than in a married couple. Meetings may be rare, but they are always filled with vivid impressions.

How to save

Relationships are more serious work than what you do every day in the office. Various crises and misunderstandings can lead to the breakdown of relationships. To prevent this from happening, you should build a correct behavioral line.

• It is impossible to communicate without mutual exchange of secrets. The desire to share feelings or, conversely, to hear details overwhelms the beautiful half of humanity. However, every lady can have her own little secrets. At the same time, you need to be able to keep secrets if everyone has entrusted them to you.
• You should not start a relationship with her ex - this can become a real test for a friend, especially if the breakup was painful.
• Competition and rivalry are excluded. In the struggle for primacy, people become real enemies.
• Moving to another city, vacationing abroad or a business trip is not a reason to stop communicating. It is important to pay attention to a text message, a photograph, an interesting post, or a call. Perhaps she needs help now.

The difference between female and male friendship

Male camaraderie is expressed through the expression of warm feelings and the demonstration of emotional connection. The basis of friendship is mutually beneficial and pleasant time together. Friendship is formed on common interests, views on life or place of residence.

Is there friendship between a man and a woman: signs, types, pros and cons

Why female friendship doesn't exist

According to history, the absence of sincere female friendship was invented by men who did not question their male friendship. Men are calm in assessing the situation and are able to smooth out misunderstandings among themselves, while girls are ready to cause a scandal literally out of nowhere.

The primary reason for a quarrel between girls is considered to be envy. Despite this fact, they can still calmly have a sincere conversation. But when a difficult situation arises, you definitely shouldn’t expect help from such a friend.

In true female friendship, friends know all each other's secrets. While men may remain silent about problems in the family, they will not talk about the lives of their children, life’s difficulties, I will discuss exclusively topics of interest to everyone. Guys maintain this distance to save face, avoiding showing their vulnerability. After all, it is the person closest to you who can hit you the hardest, because they know your most vulnerable spot. Guys try to avoid this.

We can conclude that male friendship is easier to maintain for a long period. Their friendship is stronger. However, if you take a critical situation, no matter how strange it may seem, because of a sense of duty, the girlfriend will arrive to the rescue earlier out of emotions, while the man will think about everything and arrive a little later, but with a solution.

Rules for maintaining friendship

You can lose a friendship in an instant if you neglect the basic requirements:

• When creating a friendship, it is necessary to select a person with the same social position in society, similar intelligence and family status.
• If there are problems at work or in the family, do not disclose them, but try to solve them yourself. Otherwise, the friend may be drawn into unnecessary showdowns, thereby complicating the situation.
• Do not neglect each other's personal space; each should have personal time without the presence of other people.
• You shouldn't share all the information you have, especially information that could complicate your life in the future. A friend may, by pure chance or unknowingly, spill important information, thereby damaging your reputation.
• Try to ensure that your relationship contains equality and mutual assistance. If in a relationship one of the friends is ready to sacrifice everything for the sake of the other, and the second constantly finds reasons to avoid help or support - this is parasitism.
• There is an unspoken rule: never “wash the bones” of a friend behind her back. If the “washing” is revealed in the future, trust will never be restored.

The most important thing is to appreciate those people who, at this moment in time, are sincerely happy about your achievements and successes!

In your opinion, is there friendship between girls or not? Tell us in the comments what kind of friendship exists between them in your opinion.