An honest person: the pros and cons of honesty

There is no need to deceive me, I am happy to be deceived myself.” How often do we hear this phrase? So often that it no longer hurts our ears and is even perceived as commonplace. Indeed, almost every day in our lives we encounter deception.
He has many faces, knows how to disguise himself well, and even positions himself as a benefactor. What about honesty? What deep meaning does it carry within itself, or is it no longer held in high esteem in our lives? And the great words of the great poet immediately come to mind:

“It annoys me that the word honor is forgotten, and that in honor there are slander behind the back.” This is what Vysotsky said, and, undoubtedly, he was right in many ways.

Basic human virtue


Honesty is an important requirement of morality and also underlies trust between people. Their life together is unimaginable without truthfulness and trust. In addition, this is avoidance of lies and fraud in relation to others. You can be an honest person while giving false information if you have the same point of view. In this case, there is no selfish motive for lying.

Such a worthy quality as honesty penetrates deep into the essence. Every word and action clearly demonstrates it. An honest person with a strong character and a crystal clear reputation deserves respect and recognition. At the same time, honesty is a point of view regarding the developed spirituality of the interlocutor so much as to understand and accept the whole truth, no matter how bitter it may be. Nobility is also closely related to honesty.

Is everything so clear?

In reality, everything is not so simple. Should a doctor be honest? Naturally! How can we trust him with our health and even life if he lies to us, making the wrong diagnoses or prescribing unnecessary medications.

What if, based on the results of your tests, the doctor finds out the terrible truth. Should he then come and tell you point-blank: “Everything is very bad.” No chance. No one and nothing will help you." Are you sure you would like to hear this truth from a doctor? And that such honesty is really much better than understatement. After all, the doctor could have acted differently. Tell you that he was very upset by the results of your tests. And he will think about what can be done. This is a “white lie.” And to say that this is bad would be wrong.

And also, in society, there are stereotypes and dogmas. And you are not at all obliged to follow them. If your path of self-development and self-expression does not correspond to someone else's ideas, this does not mean that you should correspond to them. Live in a way that is true and right for you personally. We repeat: if it does not harm anyone and does not violate the boundaries of other people in any way.

Honesty in relationships

  • Honesty breeds trust. And trust is the basis of strong family relationships, friendships, raising children and career growth. How many families have been destroyed due to lies and deception, how many friends and relationships have been lost. And the reason for this is the lack of honesty in relationships between people
  • It is important to understand that small lies always develop into bigger ones. It accumulates like a snowball, causing in a person constant feelings of tension, nervousness, guilt and fear of being exposed. This can greatly ruin your life and relationships with loved ones and acquaintances.
  • Lying causes stress and health problems.

There is real evidence of the positive impact of honesty on human health. The results of such studies were carried out in America and were published there.

Half of the 110-person group was asked to stop lying for 10 weeks. The other half did not receive any instructions. Scientists assessed the health status and level of interpersonal relationships of each of the subjects on a weekly basis. The number of “wrongs” said was determined using a lie detector.

pros

What gives a person such quality? Much:

  • freedom - there is no pretense, cowardice, no need to be hypocritical and curry favor with anyone;
  • a chance to achieve the triumph of justice, fairness;
  • honor and respect of the environment;
  • personal growth, increased self-esteem;
  • improvement of well-being.

Health effects

It is a proven fact that this trait contributes to improved well-being. Let's look at ways to improve this:

Method 1 – increasing self-esteem.

Numerous experiments by University of Massachusetts psychologist Feldman made it possible to find out that people cannot live without lies. They have to lie every 10 minutes. And the main reason is the desire to embellish, to look more competent, friendlier. A person wants to be admired by others. And the explanation for this phenomenon is banally simple - the desire to thus arouse interest in one’s person on the part of other people. After all, according to many, how they live in reality and their actions are of no interest to anyone. But the paradox is that honesty itself helps to increase a person’s self-esteem. It is sincerity that evokes reciprocal acceptance and sympathy, which helps improve such quality as self-sufficiency.

Method 2 – reducing the degree of anxiety.

Constant lying becomes a human habit. But at the same time, he is terribly afraid that he will be caught in deception. Enormous mental and energetic efforts provoke the deceiver to constantly remain in stress and anxiety. A person is constantly guarding his reputation. He is afraid of mistakes, embarrassment, and the level of anxiety is growing every day.

An honest person does not need to strain his psyche so much. There is no need to elaborate in inventions and different explanations. He spends his time and internal resources on more pleasant things than inventing stories and details for verisimilitude. Such people feel natural in any situation. They have the energy and emotional health for the other, the better and the nobler.

Method 3 – improving overall well-being.

Research by psychology professor Kelly in two groups of volunteers showed that those who lied constantly


health problems were periodically observed, and honest participants in the experiment felt excellent. People who told the truth stopped having headaches and throat pains, stopped having attacks of nausea and dizziness, etc. And before participating in the study, all this was quite common. As for the group of “deceivers,” there were no changes in their health status. They still had to cope with various ailments.

Having received such results, Kelly decided to become the subject of research herself. Namely, stop lying about any, even minor, reason for three winter months. And she was amazed that during the entire winter she did not get sick even once. After all, before this, the cold was her constant companion during the cold season. Her energy and cheerfulness at that time could be envied. But that's not all. Previously, she constantly did not get enough sleep and felt overwhelmed. After the cessation of lies, even in small things, a short night's sleep gave vigor and good health.

As we can see, honesty can work wonders.

Being honest with yourself and the golden mean

If we dislike a person, we try not to notice him and limit communication with him to a minimum. This


The same applies to honesty with oneself. And this is the key to mental health. After all, untruth, even a minor lie is capable of destruction. It destroys strength, energy, everything positive and gives rise to fears.

Lies have many faces. We will not now touch on the moral side of the nature of untruth, lying for salvation. Let’s think about whether people are always truthful to themselves. We often lie to ourselves and close our eyes to surrounding events, actions and things and what is going on inside us. It's more convenient this way. Often the reason is the fear of admitting something, the reluctance to fully understand and analyze actions. We think it’s easier this way, deceiving ourselves and destroying. If you neither see nor acknowledge the problem, then it doesn’t exist. But this is not true either. Paradoxically, realizing this, they still do not stop lying.

And to stop lying - you need to start making efforts to get rid of obstacles and shortcomings. Until we stop lying, we are prisoners of self-justification and self-deception, irresponsibility for our lives. Justifying oneself and one's actions is man's most insidious enemy. And many internally justify themselves for their baseness, deception, and abomination. This also applies to criminals who try to justify the atrocities they have committed. We are talking about negotiations with conscience.

Every day, living and working in conditions we don’t like, doing things we don’t like in an environment of misunderstanding, we destroy our dreams and hopes. All this leads to burnout, fatigue, stressful situations, and quarrels. The realities of life dictate their own rules. And sometimes it is very difficult to achieve the golden mean between duplicity with a complete lack of truthfulness and uncompromisingness with a lack of measure. And this is honesty. But if you manage to find it, then you get freedom.

Consider Honesty and Deception


Cheating occurs for reasons of not realizing where it can lead.

Well, guess what, I lied a little?! After all, many people do this! And they live, and everything is fine. It just sometimes becomes incomprehensible that he seems to be such a good guy, and suddenly some unpleasant event happens. Well, okay, it doesn’t happen to anyone, this is life!

Over time, deception becomes a habit. Unnoticeable, painless. Life shines with colors, sometimes with varying degrees of success, but you can live!

And then the moment comes when all his friends and acquaintances turn away from a person. He is left completely alone. A once attractive young man (at least put it on the cover of a magazine) turns into an old man in his thirties. It's not a pleasant sight. Loss of trust in the eyes of all your close people and acquaintances, damaged relationships with any business partners, complete misunderstanding.

This is an indicator of deception. Where does a lie lead? Everyone makes mistakes, there are no sinless people on this earth. After all, in order to correct himself and cleanse his soul, a person comes to earth. Some improve their lives, others worsen.

How to distinguish an honest person from a deceiver?

Relationships between people are an eternal topic. Many people ask how to distinguish between truth and lies. Everything is simple as always!

Example

You have a friend with whom you communicate. Spend time walking with your children, or meet in a cafe for a cup of tea. You don't understand whether your friend is honest or not.

We give the answer, you can draw your own conclusion: You simply observe how a person acts with others .

  • Her phone rings. She doesn’t pick up the phone, shrugging it off and saying: “I don’t want to!”
    You are at a loss why doesn't the person answer the phone. After all, phones were created to communicate with everyone, right? If you don’t think it’s necessary to give your number to someone, no one will force you to do it. Why give a number to someone you don't like to talk to?

    Well, okay, you had a great time, had a heart-to-heart chat and went your separate ways.

    And then the moment comes when you call this person, but he doesn’t pick up the phone. After waiting a few minutes, you dial again in the hope of some kind of glitch with your mobile operator, but no miracle happens.

    So what, you ask? We answer - remember her reaction to the phone call when you were together in a cafe. Absolutely right, as they did with that incoming call , I assure you, they do the same with you. It doesn’t matter how many years you were friends, or were just acquaintances. For people who live by deception, this is par for the course. They do only what is beneficial to them and do not think at all about others .

Essay on Honesty

At all times, there have been such concepts as love, loyalty and friendship. Among them, the word honesty stands out as a bright spot, which to some extent is a kind of basis for these categories.

Honesty is one of the components of the moral side of a person. It is associated with the ability to express thoughts and feelings directly, without confusion, whatever they may be. These are motives that come from the depths of the soul. Thoughts that are fueled by integrity and truthfulness.

Where there is honesty, there is also loyalty, integrity and conscience. This concept should accompany a person throughout his life. If such a pattern is violated, then deception comes into force, for which sooner or later one becomes ashamed.

Lack of honesty leads to doubts and a person's split opinion. Each of us can stumble at least once in our lives. Then comes acquaintance with this quality. Having experienced awkwardness or fear, a person sees two ways - lies or sincerity. Deception prevents you from leading a healthy lifestyle.

Joy, respect from others, trust fill the heart when there is nothing to hide, there is no stone in one’s bosom. Dishonesty is, first of all, self-deception, which weighs heavily on the soul. To avoid omissions and excuses, you need to learn to admit your own wrongness and develop this quality of character in yourself.

If we strive for kindness and decency, then honesty will certainly become a mentor in enriching the moral side of a person. It becomes an assistant in acquiring other equally important qualities such as straightforwardness, self-confidence, lack of boasting, which save a person from weaknesses, help to acquire willpower, and be successful in every endeavor.

In any area of ​​our life, a person experiences the influence of honesty from the outside or encounters it personally, earning respect or being criticized by others. Thus gaining experience, we give a correct assessment of ourselves, choosing the right actions in the future.

What is Honesty - essay

Honesty is one of the most important qualities of a person. This is the ability to always admit that you are wrong and be sincere in any situation.

Everyone has been taught since childhood that lying is bad. But over time we forget about this, because once we lie, we will continue to do so. To undertell, to embellish, and thus simply to lie, these are ordinary things in our everyday life. We think that it will be easier and simpler for us. But, over time, everything secret becomes an obvious and clearly expressed lie for everyone.

You need to be able to express your thoughts honestly and this is the only way to solve this or that situation. An honest person always inspires trust in the people around him. After all, they do not see negative qualities in him, but only kindness and sincerity.

You can rely on such a person and have a good time together. Knowing that he will never discuss you or say something behind your back. There are very few such people and it is very lucky to have such a friend.

I believe that lying is bad, first of all, for yourself. After all, after lying to someone dear to you or even just a friend, you feel morally depressed.

You will not be able to remember all your lies and someday you will misspoke. You will most likely feel ashamed, and you will want to fix everything and return it, but people will stop trusting you.

You will lose what is most precious, but only some omissions and secrets. And it’s very difficult to regain people’s trust. Having caught you in a lie once is enough to stop communicating with you altogether.

The main thing in a person is honesty, when he is trusted, and he can be himself. Honest people are highly valued in our gray world, do not become one of these evil and selfish people who have forgotten about moral values.

I respect honest people and try to be a truthful and polite person. But this is not as simple as it seems from the outside; you need a lot of strength and nerves, which are often lacking. Try to make this world a little kinder and more honest.

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