The main reasons why guys are afraid to meet girls are described, the main signs of female sympathy are listed, tips and recommendations are given on how to “read” a girl and make acquaintance with her.
Relationships between opposite sexes are multifaceted, mysterious and often unpredictable. In most cases, this is due to the mystery and complex nature of a woman. Men often do not understand hints and find it difficult to decipher the signals of sympathy given by women. How to guess that a girl is interested and get to know her without fear of being rejected, you will learn from this article.
Why are guys afraid to meet girls, and why do girls stay lonely?
The following fears often prevent a guy from meeting a girl he likes:
- Refusal A man who is selfish by nature values his dignity and is very afraid to hear the word “no.” A man takes refusal hard, so not everyone decides to take such a risk.
- Crowded place A possible reason why a guy is in no hurry to approach a girl is a large crowd of people around her. The fear of being ridiculed in front of a crowd is much worse than being told no in private.
- Inconsistency A man is afraid of comparison with the girl’s friends, who may be more successful, with what she does in life and her financial situation. The fear of losing in these and other comparisons can push away his desire to get closer to the girl
- Negative attitude Doubts in one’s own abilities and thoughts that nothing will work out predetermine the guy’s attitude, who ultimately decides that there is no need to try
- Being used There are often cases when a girl meets a guy and has a nice conversation with him only with the expectation that he will pay for her drink or dinner, and then disappears in search of another for the same purpose. The fear of joining the ranks of men whom women use for their own purposes scares guys away from unfamiliar girls
How to show a man that you are available for a relationship: 7 signals
What postures and body movements will help you say: “You don’t need to be afraid of me. I won't bite"? I coach women to use the following availability cues. If you're a man, learn to read these signals so you can find partners who show you that you can have a conversation with them without fear of unpleasant consequences.
Don't take up too much physical space. This means that you should not spread your bag and coat on chairs, take up the entire cafeteria table with your personal belongings, and should not stand or sit with your legs too wide apart. This is understandable: too much occupied space is perceived as a sign of strength and superiority.
Turn your feet slightly inward. When standing, men usually place their feet 15–25 centimeters wide. Turning your feet in or out corresponds to your status in the social hierarchy. Feet turned outward say: “I am strong.” Feet turned inward say: “You can approach me.” Wide stance of the legs and turning the feet outward create an impression of strength and can be perceived as a signal of readiness to attack.
Women usually place their feet ten to fifteen centimeters wide. If they want to show that they can be approached without fear, then they should spread their legs no more than fifteen centimeters, and if they notice a man nearby who interests them particularly strongly, and want to make him feel that approaching them will not cause problems, then you should turn your toes slightly inward.
So go ahead. If you carefully look at how you walk in different shoes, you will notice that some types make you walk like a duck, forcing your feet to turn outward. Under no circumstances should you appear in them where you want to interest someone. Turning your feet outward when walking is a warning signal “Hands off!” Interestingly, such a gait is often caused by excess weight or pregnancy - conditions when the attention of strangers, single men is not particularly needed.
How shoes can enhance your attractiveness
If you're a woman, try walking in every pair of shoes you own to see how they affect your posture and gait. Ideally, this should be done in front of a large mirror. Flip-flops, clogs, and other types of flat shoes are comfortable, but they can cause you to shuffle your soles and walk in what is known as a cavalry gait, with your feet wide apart and bent. Some types of shoes can cause you to slouch or walk like a man, sticking your belly out instead of swinging your hips smoothly. High heels can increase the range of motion of your hips, but if the grimace on your face says, “These stiletto heels will kill me,” then they are unlikely to enhance your attractiveness.
Smile. Even if this is obvious, it still doesn’t hurt to remind you that in a state of tension we cannot smile sincerely and openly, and when we try to put on an air of importance, we often don’t smile at all. Smiling is an international signal of friendliness. That's why the half-smiles and half-smirks on the Joker's face in the Batman films look so scary. Such expressions are unusual on the faces of normal people, in whose world a smile signifies safety, not threat.
You probably remember many times when a man asked you why you weren't smiling. The fact is that when you smile, men find it easier to approach you.
Shrug your shoulders. When something frightens us, we try to protect our head by raising our shoulders towards our ears and retracting our head. A quick and short movement of your shoulders up, accompanied by a glance towards the man you are interested in, tells him about your pliability.
I've seen women master the art of shrugging. They perform this movement with sensual, downright feline grace. They see a handsome man, give him a brief appraising glance, and then shrug.
Tilt your head. Bowing the head is not a purely feminine gesture, but it is more commonly used by women and is generally considered a signal of submission.
The tilt of the head symbolically exposes the neck. It resembles the head movement that wolves make when the leader of the pack approaches them. This movement says: “I reveal my most vulnerable place to show you that I know that you can tear me apart. So let’s not start a fight for supremacy.”
In addition, head tilts serve as a nonverbal signal of attentive listening. Your ear moves closer to the speaker to symbolically say, “Pour more of this fascinating information into me.”
Note to men reading this: If a woman has stopped tilting her head, she may not want you to continue talking.
Open your crossed arms. They can serve as a protective wall. If you need to make a man want to approach you, you have to let that wall fall—or at least lower the drawbridge. If you need some degree of security in order to open up, take a glass of drink in your hand.
Advertising
How can a guy become more confident in himself?
In order to cope with fears, you need to work on your confidence. If a guy has no doubt that he is worth a girl and believes in the strength of his own merits, he will certainly be able to convince the girl of this. And if the acquaintance does not develop as desired, he will not “obsess” with failures.
Practice
- Start with people you know and with whom you feel comfortable communicating. Start conversations with them on any topic, even the most frank ones
IMPORTANT: Experience in multifaceted communication and the ability to maintain a conversation in different situations are guarantors of confident dialogue when you subsequently meet a girl
- At the next stage, learn to compliment your colleagues and female friends. They should be short and natural. For example: “this dress suits you”, “you look good”
- Now you can move on to something more complex: casual communication with strangers. You don’t have to immediately set yourself the goal of getting a girl’s phone number. A simple way to start is to say hello. Then you can try to start a conversation. The main thing is to be honest and sincere. Experiment, look for your style and remember that your goal is to become more relaxed and confident, and not to find a life partner. The dialogue didn’t work out - it’s okay, it’ll work out with another girl
2. Achievements If you consider yourself unfulfilled, unlucky and don’t like yourself, you can hardly achieve confidence in communicating with the female half. Analyze your achievements, find your strengths, make a list of your most successful qualities. You will understand: everything is not so bad. Perhaps you only focused on your failures and forgot about your achievements. Shift your focus, believe in your potential. This will bear fruit not only in your personal life, but will also help in your professional development.
3. Study of female nature Learn to read a girl and respond to her signs. Perhaps she is already showing sympathy for you, and you just don’t notice it. If you learn to correctly interpret the signals she gives, you will know what to expect, which means you will feel much more confident
What does sympathy mean?
Sympathy is a feeling for a person that symbolizes emotional closeness with him. In a love relationship, sympathy means attraction, desire.
In Greek, sympatia is an internal disposition towards a person. The word also means attractiveness.
Sympathy often arises on the basis of common views, interests, and values. Can be expressed as a positive reaction to a person's appearance or behavior.
Difference from politeness
Politeness is a respectful, tactful attitude, and a willingness to find compromises.
You can communicate politely with any people, even those you don’t like, irritate or cause other unpleasant emotions. This is an indicator of good manners and ability to behave in society; it does not indicate attraction or other intentions.
Sympathy is an emotion, and politeness is just a form of communication that does not imply a special attitude towards a person.
Difference from falling in love
People develop sympathy almost in the first minutes after meeting and communicating.
Falling in love is a much stronger and more emotional feeling that takes some time to form. Falling in love is often based on sympathy.
How can a girl show sympathy?
Men believe that they are the ones who take the first step towards an unfamiliar girl. In fact, the first communication between a guy and a girl happens long before words. Gaze, gait, body posture and other signals can give clear information whether a girl is interested in dating. In other words, a woman chooses the man she likes and is the first to give him many non-verbal signals. And the man just comes up to her and starts a conversation.
IMPORTANT: Contrary to popular belief, the initiator of dating in 90% of cases is a woman.
Most men are unable to recognize the signs women give or get confused by them, are afraid of making a mistake and simply do not respond to these signals. If a man does meet a girl, it is usually just a desire to take a risk.
IMPORTANT: A girl shows sympathy in most cases using non-verbal signals.
Liking test
