How to fall in love with a guy or man who loves you: advice from psychologists

What does it mean

A large number of books have been written about love, many songs have been sung. But what does it mean? How can you find out and by what signs can you determine what love really is?

READ How to beautifully ask a girl to meet: examples of the best phrases

From a scientific point of view

Scientists say that the body's chemical processes cause one to experience love. Studies involving couples in love have confirmed the theory that it can influence a person’s health and well-being. This is indicated by the following biological manifestations:

  • cardiopalmus;
  • increased body temperature;
  • sweaty hands;
  • decreased attention and concentration.

The feeling of so-called butterflies in the stomach is the work of the adrenal glands and the adrenaline and cortisol they secrete. A person experiences similar sensations due to stressful situations, with severe fear or excitement. At this point, there is an increase in the level of hormones in the blood, which “order” the body to increase blood pressure, as well as increase blood flow to the muscles and lungs. A sharp outflow of blood from the abdominal cavity is those same “butterflies”.

It turns out that if you can provoke a feeling of fear, for example, by making a parachute jump, then it is quite possible to intentionally induce love, since you can try to fall in love with a person using the same principle. But is it really that simple?

The irrationality of the actions of a person in love is explained by the shutdown of the frontal cortex of the brain, which is responsible for making decisions. That is why the feeling of fear is dulled, and the feeling of happiness accompanies the state of love.

READ A man does not say that he loves: how to find out if there are feelings

From a psychological point of view, love is a relatively stable state, determined by sexual needs and expressed in the desire to provide maximum personal significance for another person in such a way as to receive a similar response with a similar level of stability, intensity and tension.

Why doesn't a man reciprocate feelings?

The reasons for a woman’s lack of feelings of love can be disappointments in past relationships, when subconscious fear puts up a kind of block that does not allow her to relax and accept her partner’s advances.

A woman cannot achieve complete sexual satisfaction unless she has a strong emotional attachment to her partner. Therefore, the lack of physical attraction is natural in such a situation, just as the fact that falling in love with a guy who loves you is difficult due to the need to show a response.

You need to relax, try to overcome internal resistance, evaluate your partner from the other side and trust him.

He wants you to be honest

Men for the most part do not like to show their feelings, and they do not have many people to whom they can open up. It is a woman who can become the person with whom he can safely share his emotions.

Strong relationships are built on the ability to open up emotionally. A man needs to know that you will not turn away from him in a moment of weakness, that he can be vulnerable with you. A man needs a woman who will see his imperfections but still love him.

You can't order your heart, but you can order your brain

Methods of self-education are based on the level of development of self-awareness and self-management of human behavior. Managing your thoughts includes methods of self-persuasion and self-hypnosis.

Self-persuasion is an argument with oneself that begins with reasoned arguments for and against. An effective way to identify a particular line of behavior is to logically divide arguments into groups. For self-hypnosis to be productive, you need to develop a positive focus on results.

Can love for a person come with time?

How long does it take for partners to start experiencing feelings of love? There are examples when spouses begin to experience mutual emotions only after a certain period of time.

When feelings do not arise immediately, how a girl can fall in love with her boyfriend later becomes a pressing question. To do this you need to be patient. Real mature feelings can arise years later, so it is important to realize the importance of the person himself as an individual for future relationships.

READ The chemistry of love: how hormones affect people's attraction to each other

What stages do you need to go through?

The concepts of “infatuation” and “love” should not be confused. To achieve true love, you need to go through a certain path and overcome several stages:

  1. Love. The first and most emotional stage, during which a person experiences a state of euphoria.
  2. Satiation. It occurs after falling in love due to the fact that receiving a state of pleasure causes a constant need. As a result, the “doses” of communication cease to be controlled.
  3. Rejection. Characterized by the manifestation of doubts about the correct choice of a partner.
  4. Patience. The need to limit one’s own needs for the benefit of a partner, characterized by internal struggle.
  5. Respect. An important stage that manifests itself in mutual attention to each other’s interests. It is considered an element of strong attachment.
  6. Love. Only after going through all the stages can we speak with confidence about the emergence of this feeling.

Difficulties strengthen relationships

Any pair is tested for strength. This happens at a time when a couple has to solve some problems through joint efforts. Relationships have two ways to develop after difficulties: either the couple becomes stronger and the relationship reaches a new level, or feelings begin to cool. You need the first option and this is not an easy task. What difficulties can be artificially created in a couple in order to strengthen the relationship? Firstly, traveling together immediately determines whether people are suitable for each other or not. Just don’t need to go together to a hotel, where amazing service will await you. You need something more extreme, like a backpacking trip. Your man will be tested for strength: he will need to look for wood for the fire, set up a tent and try to prevent you from getting lost in the forest. Surely you will like how he takes care of you and shows you the beauty of nature. The second option for testing the relationship is to start a renovation. You will immediately see how a man makes concessions and what he knows how to do. Surely this test will help you look at it differently.

Three components of love

Passion is one of the main components of love, as it is determined by sexual needs.

This is the highest manifestation of sexual desire, as well as a necessary component of love. In order for an attraction to acquire characteristic features, it must have a certain strength. It is necessary for your loved one to become the only source of complete sexual satisfaction.

Friendship based on common views, tastes and goals. In sincere love, friendship achieves a sense of unity, in which everything personal becomes common, and everything common becomes personal. A loving person receives pleasure only from contacts involving the organs of vision, touch, smell and hearing.

Respect for the experiences, dignity, intellectual abilities of the individual, moral qualities. Any decision must be made jointly. Even if it causes some differences of opinion, two people who respect each other's needs and aspirations will find a compromise. In addition, respect is the key to loyalty and trust.

As the ancient Hindus argued, love is the attractions of the body, spirit and mind, collected together. These three elements complement, compensate and feed each other. Collected together, they do not allow the partner to weaken, reaching such strength over time that they subsequently cannot exist separately.

READ 7 important stages of love in a relationship: traditional, homosexual and virtual couples

Romance will save the world

Relationships are made up of a thousand little things that happen during the development of a romance. The main memories and history of a couple are formed from pleasant and not so pleasant moments, thanks to which the period of time spent together becomes a tangible part of life. The more emotions a relationship causes, the more difficult it is to abandon your loved one. Therefore, if you fill your communication with romance, it will be easier for you to love the one with whom you share your joy. Try to create a romantic atmosphere in a couple that helps to quickly warm up feelings. Have romantic dinners more often, make each date memorable and varied. Give each other gifts, take beautiful photos together, come up with little traditions, celebrate holidays together - in general, have a varied and romantic time. Under such an onslaught of romance, it will be difficult for you to resist opening your heart to love. You can even start keeping a diary of your relationship, in which you will describe all the pleasant moments that happened as a couple. If you doubt your feelings, you can re-read it and go back to a time when you were happy.

Psychologist's advice

To create love experiences, you can simulate the formation of certain situations. With the help of self-programming for positive thoughts and sensations, you can control your emotions, which gives you a greater chance of developing a real feeling.

How to fall in love with a girl who loves you

If you feel that a girl loves you, do not avoid communication. By paying significant attention to her and showing care, you can contribute to rapprochement, as well as identifying common interests. When receiving positive emotions in the process of joint leisure, those same invisible threads arise that unite people.

What to do to get attached to a woman

The feeling of affection is generated by the desire for care and attention on the part of a woman. Do not push her away in this desire, let her be nearby, then you will feel tenderness, warmth and gratitude for the care shown.

Don’t forget about relaxing together, arrange small holidays, pleasant surprises, and get positive emotions. This will give a mutual feeling of comfort and tranquility, and will give the woman a feeling of confidence in her partner.

How to love the guy you're dating

At some point, it may begin to seem that the relationship has reached a dead end, since it is impossible to fall in love with a guy you are already dating.

To do this, you can try to dilute the relationship with adrenaline and extreme sports. Try, for example, going on a river boat trip or rock climbing. The production of certain hormones will contribute to the emergence of the necessary experiences.

You need to try to allow yourself, like a girl, to fall in love with a boy, to enjoy the time spent with him.

How to be loved

Feeling your importance is extremely important for a woman, as is the need not only to fall in love, but also to be loved. Even if your feelings have not strengthened or are slightly dull, you can only be happy from the knowledge that you are an important part of another person’s life. The response will not be long in coming if:

  • show attention and care;
  • spend more time together;
  • show interest in the man’s daily activities and provide support.

To truly feel loved, you need to start with loving yourself, as this is an indicator of inner harmony and self-sufficiency.

Is it possible to return feelings to my husband?

Family life often destroys all the romance in a relationship, with which feelings for the spouse disappear. How to fall in love with a man again, to return what previously tied you in marriage is not always clear when the relationship reaches a dead end. First of all, you need to diversify your life together:

  1. Offer your spouse role-playing games in bed, use erotic underwear. This stimulates relationships and reanimates past passion.
  2. Change the situation to the diametrically opposite one. If you are used to being more at home, go to the movies, a restaurant, or even a nightclub. If you have a busy social life, arrange a quiet family dinner with simple home cooking. This will create a feeling of togetherness and kinship.
  3. Find a common hobby. Join a gym, play board games, start building a collection of anything, become an avid movie fan. The point is to do it together.

Don't be afraid to show your emotions openly. Feel them when you are together.

Do you need to force yourself?

First, you need to answer yourself honestly, why do you want to attach your feelings to a man who shows you increased attention, and also whether you should force yourself and think about how to love a guy if you don’t see prospects for developing a relationship.

Falling in love is more of a spontaneous feeling than a planned one. Love itself comes later. If doubts arise at the stage of falling in love, then access to a real deep feeling, one might say, is already closed at the very beginning level.

When not to get into a relationship

Sometimes it can be difficult to answer to yourself, how can you not fall in love with a guy who really cares and surrounds you with signs of attention. However, antipathy towards a person arises on a subconscious level even at the initial stage of acquaintance. Over time, as you get to know your partner better, it may disappear. But in case the question of what can make me fall in love persistently arises in my mind, I need to think twice before deciding to live together.

The reasons for hostility can be external characteristics, gestures or even smell. If the feeling of disgust is difficult to overcome, there is no need to go against your feelings, since the relationship will only cause discomfort.

The need to love and be loved is a natural human desire. But when you don’t find the strength to reciprocate your partner’s feelings, you shouldn’t torture either yourself or him. If you like a person in all respects and really loves you, you should try to start a relationship. Mutual sympathy and friendship can eventually develop into strong love.

Find all his positive qualities

Maybe he doesn't throw his socks around and is ready to wash the dishes instead of playing on the computer. Perhaps he is ready to buy you any clothes to suit your taste and let you go to his girlfriends.

If only his shortcomings catch your eye, every word he says causes you irritation and, perhaps, even disgust, then you need to find in him such a positive quality that would allow you to close your eyes to all the minor shortcomings.

Maybe it’s worth making a list of all the good and bad qualities of the candidate, mentally exaggerating all the good qualities, thereby extolling the guy, and calling all the shortcomings meaningless and unnecessary little things. After all, you decided that he is the one worthy to become the father of your future children, therefore, there are qualities in him that are higher for you than external, physical attractiveness.

Why do men love some people and marry others?

After all, when making a choice between a stunning handsome man who will cheat on you and show his frivolity in all its glory, and, perhaps, a not so handsome young man, in whose reliability you will be one hundred percent sure, what will you choose?

Rating
( 2 ratings, average 4.5 out of 5 )
Did you like the article? Share with friends:
For any suggestions regarding the site: [email protected]
Для любых предложений по сайту: [email protected]