How to love a person who loves you? 12 steps

In this article we will tell you:

  1. What is it for
  2. 12 ways to fall in love
  3. Signs of reciprocity
  4. How to understand that there is no point in continuing

In pursuit of dreams, you may not notice your faithful companion nearby, who is waiting for reciprocity. Sometimes it’s worth thinking about how to love the person who loves you, because perhaps he is the one destined for you.

For the most part, people strive to create a couple. Few people want to feel lonely. But, unfortunately, it often happens that feelings are not reciprocated. Unrequited love is not such a rare occurrence.

Frankness is important

It is said above that it is necessary to refrain from criticism and try not to provoke quarrels. However, this does not mean that you need to remain silent about everything that does not suit you in a relationship, especially if we are talking about really important points that can destroy it. A frank conversation helps eliminate many problems if conducted in a calm and friendly tone. For example, you should not hide your preferences in bed from your partner, and also forget to be interested in his habits and desires.

Emphasis on “+”

Try not to pay attention to the disadvantages and shortcomings. After all, you are not Miss Perfect either. When you focus on the bad aspects of a person, the overall impression becomes negative. If you change the pole, you will be surprised how much your opinion can change.

You just have to start thinking more positively and paying attention to the advantages. Don't be afraid to give thanks. Find things for which you can thank the person. Surely he cares, pays attention, gives gifts or surprises.

If you think about it, we really rarely thank our loved ones, considering their behavior to be something ordinary. When you begin to focus on such little things, your inner feeling will change.

How to live without experiencing reciprocity

Unrequited love is a terrible feeling that is accompanied by physical and emotional attraction to a person. Non-reciprocal feelings cause excitement and desire in men to achieve their chosen one by any means. The guys are filled with energy and refuse to give up after the first refusal. But in most cases, girls do not reciprocate, which breaks the heart of the opposite sex.

In such a situation, psychologists recommend not to become depressed, but to remain calm. A man should not blame himself and look for shortcomings. Unrequited love is a normal phenomenon that needs to be experienced. To do this, you should distract yourself, find a new activity or hobby. Over time, non-reciprocal feelings will go away, and the guy will be ready for new acquaintances.

Is it possible to command the heart

Love often leads to disappointment. Men choose their chosen one with their eyes, and then pay attention to her character and advantages. But women cannot trust good looks and choose guys based on other parameters.

To love a man, you have to work hard on yourself. You need to listen to reason and muffle your emotions. This will help you soberly assess the situation and study your chosen one. At the same time, you can’t rush yourself. A man who has real feelings will wait for reciprocity as long as necessary.

Psychologists also recommend:

  1. Stop comparing the guy with other young people. You need to look for positive qualities in a man, not flaws. Perhaps the guy has a good fortune, a great sense of humor, or has a bright talent.
  2. Tell others how wonderful your chosen one is. Words are material, so over time the girl will begin to believe in them.
  3. Share your problems with your boyfriend. This will bring partners closer and give them new emotions.
  4. Reveal his personality. A guy may not have good looks, but he has charisma and charm. These qualities are valuable for a man.
  5. Spend time together. You can go to the cinema, cafe or have romantic walks in the evenings.
  6. Find a common hobby. This could be traveling, dancing, video games or figure skating. It all depends on the imagination and interests of the couple.
  7. Stop arguing over little things. Any conflict causes irritation and hostility towards the partner. If a dispute is inevitable, you should calm down and pull yourself together.
  8. Show initiative in bed. This method will help you get closer to a man. You need to think through every detail of the romantic scenario, change the environment or buy new lace lingerie.
  9. Take a break from each other. Because of spending time together, the guy begins to irritate. In this case, the girl should explain to him that they need personal space and a little rest. After being alone with herself, the woman will begin to miss the man and want to be with him.

READ

How to understand that a guy likes you by correspondence: features of his behavior

How to love a wealthy man

Often wealthy men fall in love with ordinary girls, but they do not reciprocate. In this case, psychologists recommend assessing the situation and then programming yourself to love. To do this, you need to find in a fan something that other men do not have. It could be money, determination or his kindness. A girl should be proud of her chosen one every day and convince herself of how lucky she is with him. This way she can build a reliable relationship with him.

How to love your spouse again

Often, in the process of family life, feelings for your husband cool down.

But psychologists know what to do to maintain passion:

  1. Get to know him again. During marriage, everyone develops new hobbies. Perhaps the man began to be interested in football, cars or hockey. In this case, the woman should show interest in his hobby. For example, read about a hobby or talk about his interests. The man will be pleased with his wife’s attention, and the relationship will sparkle with new colors.
  2. Imagine him with someone else. Many girls begin to compare their spouses with the husbands of their friends. They appear successful, attractive and caring. For this feeling to go away, you need to imagine that he is not around, he is married to another woman and they are happy. The girl will begin to be jealous and will not want to lose her lover.
  3. Praise your spouse regularly. Noticing her husband’s virtues, a woman will understand how lucky she is with her man. Constant criticism can destroy a union, so you should always note only the positive aspects of your spouse.
  4. Remember how he became interested in his boy. To do this, you need to make a list of the positive qualities of your spouse that interested the woman.
  5. Look at yourself through his eyes. A woman must put herself in her husband's place. She will see from the outside how she looks and behaves with her husband. This will help her correct mistakes and get in shape.
  6. Don't accumulate resentment. You need to stop getting offended over trifles and talk to your husband. If you accumulate resentments, the relationship may end.
  7. Have a heart-to-heart talk. You can talk about your childhood, look at old photographs or your favorite movie. Frank conversations will bring partners closer, and they will learn a lot about each other.
  8. Remember your youth. In this case, you can arrange a romantic date, make pleasant surprises, write romantic messages on social networks, etc. It all depends on the imagination and desire of the couple.
  9. Play strangers. Such a game will add new colors to the relationship and make it bright.

READ

What to talk about with a guy when you suddenly run out of things to talk about

Will the feelings come with time?

Love is an unpredictable but controllable feeling. Often, people who communicated as friends for a long time ended up becoming couples. But each case is individual, so it is impossible to give an accurate forecast of the development of events. If a girl does not feel sympathy and affection for a man, real feelings for him will not appear.

Spending time together

If a girl wants to fall in love with a young man, she needs to spend time in his company more often. It is unlikely that you will be able to evoke feelings for a stranger, so you should try to get to know the candidate better. It’s great if you manage to discover common interests and start a joint hobby. Such a pastime will certainly lead to rapprochement, and more topics of conversation will appear that are of interest to everyone. Joint attendance at social events, watching films, performances, and so on is also useful.

Be together more often

Banal advice, but working. When you spend a lot of time together, you get used to each other. And this helps you get to know the person even better.

Go to exhibitions, cinema, theater or just walk around the city. Find five places that you would like to visit and this month be sure to fulfill your old dreams.

You can find a hobby that you can do together. Clay modeling, dancing, learning a new language. Absolutely any activity will do. You can even just cook at home together.

Self-deception

If you sincerely want to love someone who is seeking attention, you can try to convince yourself that this has already happened. To do this, it is useful to behave as lovers do, to be together more often, to strive for spiritual intimacy, and to go on dates.

It is also useful to tell the world about your feelings, even if they currently exist only in the imagination of the storyteller. Let no one doubt that they see a loving couple in front of them. The more people know about the alleged affair, the better. Trying to convince others (friends, acquaintances, relatives) of your love, you can suddenly realize that it really has arisen.

Erase the line between love for life and love for people

The previous sections discussed in detail showing love and respect for people through self-confidence. This factor plays a huge role, but another aspect is no less important: how to love life and people? In this chapter, warmth towards society is defined as a consequence of an optimistic attitude towards life. There are people who notice only the positive aspects of life and all kinds of pleasures that every day provides them. Such people try to avoid negative aspects or turn a blind eye to them.

But such a line of thinking is appropriate not only in relation to love of life, but also regarding the acceptance of others. This means that in order to sincerely form a warm attitude towards people within yourself, you need to truly love all aspects of life. You should accept sleepy mornings, autumn rain and even an allergy to your favorite fruit - then you will be absolutely ready to let humanity into your life.

Imagination equals love

I love everything about him: his hands, his eyes, his wrinkles, the sound of his voice. I listen... quiet steps... I jump up and run to meet him. I'm choking with delight at how handsome he is - my hero! I imagine him this way because I love him. When we love another, we imagine him as a noble knight or her as a beautiful lady. And if not, then this is not love.

For a man in love, his woman is the ideal beauty. He is ready to idolize every feature in her, excitedly telling her how amazing she is. Others will look and may not find anything special. It is hidden from us what we are like and what people around us are like. Therefore, when we love, we see only the best.

Find common

It doesn’t matter at all whether you are younger or he is older or vice versa. Surely you have something in common. Maybe you both love Silver Age literature? Or do you both take your breath away from extreme sports?

In order to find common interests, you need to communicate more. Learn to hear your partner. Talk not only to yourself, but also carefully monitor him. Do you know what he sincerely loves and what he is passionate about? Do you know the person well? Can you easily answer ten questions about him?

When you find a common interest, you will find it much more enjoyable to communicate. You will share joint successes, tell new things and share your impressions.

Advice from practicing psychologists

Advising in love is an ignoble matter. But there are things that cannot be kept silent about, so it is worth considering the following recommendations from psychologists:

  1. Love should bring happiness, not pain and suffering.
  2. Romantic feelings fade over time. This can happen to both partners. If there is no affection and sympathy, you cannot force yourself to stay with an unloved person. He needs to be given freedom so that everyone can find their own happiness.
  3. You cannot enter into an intimate relationship just because of a man’s desire. You should not succumb to the provocation “if you love me, you will agree to this.” It must be remembered that intimate connection is not an indicator of love.
  4. If a girl is not sure of her feelings for the young man she is dating, she should think about it. Perhaps this is not her person.
  5. You can't follow the guy's lead. A girl must have her own opinion and take into account her desires and interests, otherwise the feelings will subside and the relationship will turn into a routine.
  6. Love is the work of both partners. To keep it, the guy and the girl must maintain the spark in the relationship.

Thanks to the recommendations of psychologists, now every girl knows how to fall in love with a guy who loves you very much. These tips will help you improve your personal life and build a strong relationship with a man.

Such different love

It seems to us that we have many different feelings: inspiration, joy and happiness. In fact, there is only one feeling - love. Knowledge of the online training “System-vector psychology” by Yuri Burlan gives us a precise understanding that for people with different psyches, love is felt differently. Understanding the question: how to love people—psychology brings us to a completely new level of knowledge.

A person with the skin vector perceives love through affection and tenderness, kisses, hugs, and touches. People with the anal vector consider gratitude, care, respect and attention to their deeds and words, maintaining cleanliness and comfort as a shade of love.

When you suffer in separation from your loved one, this is normal.

But you feel really bad when you lack strong feelings. You feel anger, jealousy, ingratitude, resentment. Lonely, gloomy, dissatisfied, you want with all your heart to be loved for who you are. You are looking for ways to make a person love you. You want certain gestures and actions from your partner in order to feel: I am loved. Pleasure does not last long: confirmation of love must be received constantly. At the same time, there is melancholy, regret, silent reproach in the eyes: I love you, but you...

Such manipulations are an attempt by all means to attract attention, to evoke pity and compassion for oneself. But hysterics, complaints and reproaches have the opposite effect.

These conditions can be corrected. The more developed feelings, the greater the ability to love. Classical literature of the late 19th and early 20th centuries helps to organize sensitivity and allow great feelings to mature. Read as much as possible, get inspired and cry, empathizing with the characters. There is no need to be ashamed of emotionality in the modern world. It is important that emotions are directed outward and not towards oneself.

I would especially like to highlight Miguel Cervantes’s novel “Don Quixote” - the greatest work about imagination, love and life in a world of beautiful ladies and noble knights.

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