Long-term stress can be caused by conflicts at work or with a sexual partner. Sometimes this is the fear of being rejected and panic attacks. That is, there is rather a psychological difficulty with the ability to satisfy desire through normal sexual intercourse, which creates all the conditions for the appearance of increased sexual tension.
The same factors include various complexes about one’s appearance, ability in bed, and simple lack of self-confidence.
For the most part, problems of a psychological type are characteristic of men in their youth, most likely even in adolescence. The reason is a lack of experience and an unstable hormonal background, which gives excitability above normal values and greatly affects the emotional background.
Handjobi
Apart from regular sex between two partners, masturbation is a natural way to relieve sexual tension.
However, the history of mankind knows many communities and religions that are indignant towards this method of sexual gratification. The ban on masturbation is even spelled out in the Bible. In the old days, people believed that the consequences of masturbation could be the most terrible: from rotting of the fingers with which the sinner touches the private parts to pronounced dementia. There were even paternalistic communities that introduced laws for masturbation lovers. The death penalty was used as punishment.
Modern science has conducted numerous experiments examining the psychological and physiological processes taking place in the body of a person prone to self-satisfaction, but has not found a single confirmation that this phenomenon is negative. On the contrary, studies have shown that relieving sexual tension (no matter how) improves hormonal levels and reduces the risk of inflammatory or congestive phenomena in the pelvic organs. The required frequency of self-satisfaction is very individual; it does not fit the description of any norms or limits. Statistical studies show that about 65-95% of sexually mature men and women engage in masturbation at least once a month. up to 2-3 times/week.
But this method cannot be considered universal, since it is not suitable for many people due to religious beliefs or fear of public censure (although who can know about this if the person himself does not expand on this topic). Any religion that is strict about any manifestation of sexuality has spiritual practices that allow you to relieve tension of any kind through “enlightenment” and the desire for spiritual growth. As a rule, a person who constantly thinks about high matters does not focus his attention on base desires.
Treatment
Apart from serious health problems, the main disadvantage of overstimulation in men is the rapid erection and ejaculation that accompanies it. There can be no question of any quality of sexual life in such conditions. Prompt relief is simply necessary here, but it is important to first undergo a complete diagnosis.
Direct drug treatment can be prescribed by a urologist or andrologist. If the problem is mild, you can use folk remedies.
Drug treatment
One of the main factors in the prescribed treatment is often a decrease in the sensitivity of the erect penis. Various ice-caine-based anesthetics or cooling agents have proven themselves to be effective in this regard. This measure serves to reduce a man’s arousal and delays the end of sexual intercourse.
A completely different type of medication, namely serotonin inhibitors, also helps reduce agitation. They relieve stress and help you relax, including psychologically. In their action, they are quite close to antidepressants, and are taken some time before the intended act.
Traditional methods
A serious academic approach to treatment appeared relatively recently, but the problem itself has been familiar to men for a long time. Therefore, people managed to find their own medicines for this disease, and quite effective ones:
- Motherwort, rosehip berries and watch leaves in a 1:1 ratio are mixed and ground using an accessible method. The resulting mass is poured with a liter of boiling water and simmered over low heat for 30 minutes. The finished broth is filtered and stored in a cool, dark place. Take 60 ml per day.
- Motherwort, mint and oregano in a 1:1 ratio together to a mass of 15-20 grams. The herbs are poured with a liter of boiling water and allowed to brew for 30 minutes. After this period, the liquid is strained and stored, like the decoction described above. Drink one glass a day for one and a half to two weeks.
- Rosehip (fruit), rapeseed and angelica officinalis (root) in a mixture of up to 20 grams. Pour boiling water (1 liter), infuse (30 ml), keep cool, take a glass a day.
However, one of the most important recommendations for men's health and longevity in the sexual sphere is his psychological and physical condition. Healthy, sound sleep, fresh air, proper nutrition, lack of stress and overwork - this is the key to normal erection and timely ejaculation.
Meditation2
The simplest meditation will help you clear your mind and relieve tension throughout your body. Most of the practices are available to any person, they do not pose any danger and give a good effect, but for this you need to find a suitable teacher in order to comprehend the basic basics that you can resort to if negative emotions begin to take over your consciousness.
To relieve stress and generally calm down, you can do yoga. This practice brings harmony to both the physical and spiritual sides of life, allowing you to find a new solution to accumulated problems. If you take spiritual practices seriously and learn them with the help of a certified instructor, you can bring something truly good into your life.
Power of action
The world stimulates, excites, teases. The man gets excited. This means that he wants something and can do something. Trying to suppress attraction means going against yourself and depriving yourself of the vital forces that are given to us for action.
What we can? Understand, realize, enjoy. Desires are not given in order to suppress them. Nature has a plan. Consciously we can want something else, but only until we understand our own nature.
Self-knowledge
, your desires allows you to take the right actions - leading to satisfaction. We cannot cancel our sexuality; it is given to us for life and development. But we have the freedom to develop voluntarily and happily - and this is the path consistent with nature.
Author of the publication: Oksana Agadzhanova
The article was written based on materials from the training “System-vector psychology”
Work3
Many business people can confirm that by immersing yourself in work you can get rid of many everyday problems. When thoughts are occupied with business issues that require urgent solutions, there is simply no time left to think about dissatisfaction with one’s sex life. Workaholics like to resort to this method because they are better at working than finding a way out of incomprehensible situations. The advantage of this method is that the pressing issue cannot be resolved immediately, but by working hard you can not only take your mind off painful thoughts, but earn more money, and also, quite possibly, get a promotion.
Job
For business people, there is such a way to relieve sexual tension as work. She saves not from everyone, but from many misfortunes. And it will also relieve you from the unpleasant feelings associated with dissatisfaction. Such people know that work is a universal way to survive any everyday troubles, especially if a radical solution to the problem right now is impossible. You can take on the solution to some really difficult task. Or simply assign yourself an increased load. Or, finally, get serious about your career growth. Obviously, you can get double the winnings from this method. Instead of fruitless, sometimes very painful throwing, a person gets a result that has a monetary or status expression.
Sex on the Internet5
For active Internet users, there are specialized sites where you can find a partner for online sex. There are also chat rooms where you can pick up a professional who will make sure that her online partner gets rid of the oppressive tension in the genital area and has a pleasant time.
If the object of a man’s desire is his girlfriend, who for some reason is at a distance, then you can try to persuade her to have virtual contact. This will not only help relieve the partner from forced abstinence, but will also give the couple the opportunity to experiment and explore new facets of their sexuality.
Aromatherapy
Aromatherapy has a good calming effect. You should choose incense sticks according to the “like it or not like it” principle; no one’s advice and instructions should be taken into account. If a person is not satisfied with the effect of any fragrance, he should immediately throw away this purchase and choose another one. And, of course, you can’t skimp on fragrances.
As a last resort, you can start taking mild antidepressants, but you should first discuss the problem with your doctor. Self-medication is an unacceptable and unnecessary risk. It's not worth it.
Hobbies6
Everyone has some kind of hobby that they don’t mind devoting their free time to. This is exactly what you should do to free your head from obscene thoughts. If someone doesn’t have a favorite hobby, then it’s worth looking around or remembering those activities that work best and bring pleasure. If you ever wanted to learn some skill, but didn’t have the time or opportunity, now is the time to do it. Currently, there are a huge number of schools, master classes, workshops in which they are ready to teach anyone to create, create, and develop various abilities.
Hobby
Many people are interested in how to relieve sexual tension? The universal way is to keep yourself busy with something. You can find yourself a hobby. The world is full of beautiful, excitingly interesting things. Why should they all pass by? Motorcycles, gramophone records, plants, speed, handicrafts, modeling, books, fighting sports, yard improvement, environmental landings, music, baking, drawing, mechanisms, travel, animals. Something will definitely turn out to be a suitable activity, absorbing a lot of time (so that there is no time left for stupidity) and bringing a lot of pleasure.
A healthy body means a healthy mind7
Another universal remedy that helps relieve sexual tension, regardless of gender, age and interests. Not only sexual actions, but also physical activity can bring pleasure to the body. Jogging, exercise in the gym, gymnastics, or a passion for a certain sport will give you a feeling of lightness and strength, and will allow you to release the negative energy that accumulates in the body. Regular exercise will not only relieve sexual tension, but will also help shape your figure and improve your health.
Physiological and psychological consequences
Frequent overstimulation in men leads to many unpleasant sensations. Well noticeable among them are those that are usually concentrated in the groin area (pain in the testicles and penis), but others are just as harmful to the body. Often pain is accompanied by inflammation of various etiologies and infections of the genitourinary system. But the negative impact of this condition on the cardiovascular system may not be immediately noticed, but this does not reduce the harm to the body.
Psychological overexcitation, which is characteristic mainly of men in their youth, can be asymptomatic from a physiological point of view. At the same time, psychologically it has its own effect - increased nervousness, the appearance of complexes and fears regarding the opposite sex.
It is better to eliminate problems of this type immediately, just like physiological ones. Otherwise, prolonged depression, aggressiveness, and isolation may appear. A competent psychologist or sexologist can provide appropriate assistance here.
Regular sex is important for middle-aged and older men. It provides not only psychological comfort, but is also a preventive measure for many diseases. Overexcitation leads to problems with blood circulation in general and erection in particular. In the long term, this is fraught with cardiovascular diseases, excess weight and the endocrine system.
Dance is sex in an upright position8
Dancing is another type of physical activity that helps combat anxiety. In the process of dancing, you can simply throw it out of yourself, adding sensuality and passion to your movements. Moving to the music, a woman can feel as beautiful and desirable as during sexual intimacy. You can get to know your own body and feel its sexuality by learning striptease, pole dancing, etc.
Voltage
Sexual tension corresponds to the arousal phase in the generally accepted model of sexual reactions, which was proposed by American scientists Masters and Johnson in the 60s of the 20th century.
If the tension does not find an acceptable outlet, it spreads little by little, like a drop of oil on the surface of water. First, it arises during a meeting, then during a memory, then memorable places and objects, other people (it’s not even clear how they resemble the desired object) begin to disturb. Then the associations become more and more distant, until everything except the impossibility of immediately getting what you want is repressed from your mind.
Folk remedies11
If the methods discussed above give only temporary results, then this indicates that the nervous system is very shaken. In this case, using herbal infusions can help. To prepare them, you can use herbs such as valerian, motherwort, hawthorn, lemon balm, coriander and lavender.
It is generally accepted that lemongrass, ginseng and eleutherococcus have a stimulating effect, but this opinion is not true. If taken regularly for 1 or 2 months, it will bring the body into balance.
Massage
There are people who try by all means to avoid any unpleasant sensations. How to remove sexual tension for such a hedonist? In this case, a massage course may be the solution. This is a very strong, deep effect on the entire body. Chinese medicine uses it to treat the digestive system, respiratory system, muscle and bone diseases, nervous system disorders and so on. Even the lightest, superficial massage quickly relieves tension, no matter what causes it. This is a rather expensive way to deal with personal troubles if you contact only certified specialists. But perhaps the improvement in well-being is worth the money.
Does it have to be mutual?
Sexual tension is felt most clearly when it is mutual: you feel each other's interest, and this warms you up even more. However, tension can also arise unilaterally, when you realize that you are physically attracted to someone to whom, in principle, you should not be attracted, and this interferes with normal communication with the person. If sexual attraction can arise to anyone, even to dead or non-existent people, then for tension you need direct contact with the object of desire and at least a temporary inability to realize your need.
The easiest way to understand whether your sexual tension is mutual is whether eye contact is established between you. If the person responds by looking away, this is a clear sign of disinterest.
Read on topic: 6 reasons why you want sex with your ex-boyfriend
Some tips from Belarusian women on how to relieve sexual tension if there is no permanent partner
No matter how intelligent and educated we consider ourselves, each of us needs sexual release.
No matter how intelligent and educated we consider ourselves, each of us needs sexual release.
How to relieve tension if there is no permanent partner and no prospect? Here are some tips from Belarusian girls.
Look for sex for sex's sake
Alena broke up with her young man. However, they agreed that until they find new couples, they will continue to meet in bed. Sex suited both of them, unlike relationships.
For the first few months, the girl was happy: she dropped by her esque boyfriend for a couple of hours on Saturday to relax after the work week. And everything would have been fine, but the guy rebelled:
“You don’t respect me at all!” You come as if for a manicure, but maybe I want more...
Alena modestly kept silent about the fact that her Saturday schedule really included manicure first, and then sex. Convenient: first I dropped into the salon, then for a “cup of tea.”
In general, the “sex for sex’s sake” format is good. But only if both sexual partners are ready for it.
Feel free to masturbate
Yes, yes, this is the most obvious, but at the same time the most effective way. After all, who knows your body better than you? And if for a long time you were embarrassed to study yourself, the time has come to finally deal with the erogenous zones.
A prince on a white horse will loom on the horizon, and you will tell him the shortest path to orgasm.
You can masturbate with the help of a shower, or while sitting comfortably in a half-filled bathtub under the tap - so that a thin warm stream of water hits the clitoris...
— What a variety of sex toys in stores! — Sonya says enthusiastically. — By the way, in a real store they will be cheaper than in a virtual one. The calculation is simple: many are embarrassed to cross the threshold of a sex shop in person, so they are willing to overpay in order not to blush at the window display.
But you shouldn't save too much. When I bought my first vibrator, I thought that there was no difference between the presented models. And I was sincerely perplexed as to why there was such a discrepancy in prices.
In the end, I bought the cheapest one - just to try whether I needed such a toy. The impressions were, to put it mildly, not very good. And the culprit is rough plastic.
Although, in principle, you don’t have to spend money - everything is in your hands!
Masturbation is the most obvious, but at the same time the most effective way to cope with sexual tension
Have a virtual sex session
Praise be to scientific and technological progress: you can have sex virtually, without the risk of getting some unpleasant venereal surprise. However, there are some safety nuances here too.
On one of the sites, Dasha met a man. Word for word, and so he invited her to have virtual sex. The girl, whose sex life had not been original for a long time, agreed.
We called on Skype. At first Dasha was alarmed that she did not see her interlocutor, but only heard his voice. But he explained: the webcam was just broken, but he could see the girl perfectly.
Compliment after compliment, and Dasha herself did not notice how she began to do everything the stranger asked. The next day she remembered the story and giggled. It had to be like that!
But the smile disappeared from her face after Dasha climbed onto her page on social networks. A mysterious person demanded 100 rubles in exchange for silence. Otherwise, the blackmailer promised to send the racy video to all 600 friends on her list.
You can have sex virtually, without the risk of getting some kind of sexually transmitted surprise. But there are some nuances here too...
Now this is a fairly popular divorce scheme. Not fatal, of course, but very unpleasant. But if you still manage to get yourself into such an unpleasant situation, remember: you should not send money to extortionists. They will not calm down, their appetites will grow day by day.
And working in order to sponsor scoundrels, you see, is stupid.
Compensate for lack of tactile contact
For a woman, sex is important not only physically, but also psychologically. Listen to your feelings. What do you miss more: release or tactile contact?
Perhaps hugs will help you restore peace in your soul - hug with friends more often.
“I am a classic joke character - a lonely woman who lives with a cat,” Polina says ironically. - Well, let! Scientists have proven that when you pet a cat, you really relax and your stress level decreases. And how his happy rumbling pacifies...
Until you find a man, hug your friends and loved ones more often
Go for a massage
This is also a great way to get tactile contact - even if it costs money.
“Nothing vulgar,” Varvara reasons. — An experienced master will help relieve tension in all muscles. The main thing is that it is not an aggressive massage, when almost all your bones are turned in the opposite direction.
Once in a man's hands, even if only for medical purposes, I get rid of obsessive erotic fantasies for a long time.
Play some sports
So much so that you sweat! Don't skip training, be active.
“I found a great way for me to release sexual energy,” says Eva. — I do boxing. I hit the punching bag (or my opponent) with all my heart, and life seems to get better. After training, I don’t even have the strength to think about sex.
Redirect your sexual energy in a different direction
Meditate
A calmer option that Inge likes:
— Excitement is born not below the belt, but much higher. Therefore, in order to get rid of obsessive erotic thoughts, you should completely reboot your brain. What cleanses the skull better than meditation?
The simplest option for beginners is as follows. Sit in a place where you feel comfortable. Dim the lights - you can light candles. Make yourself comfortable: it is not necessary to take the lotus position, as long as your back is straight.
Try to focus on your breathing. Take every breath you breathe in and out mindfully. At this moment there should be absolutely no thoughts in your head.
Keep yourself busy with something
“If I understand that I’m ready to climb the wall out of desire, then I start… painting this wall,” Renata laughs. - It's a joke, of course. But there is some truth in it.
When my personal life is dull and hopeless, I throw myself into work - if there is no blockage at work, then I organize it at home. For example, I’m starting a renovation. And last time I actually planted a flowerbed near my entrance.
Dancing will not only help you cope with sexual tension, but will also raise your self-esteem and tone your figure. Photo: dpol4.ru
By the way, they say that you can achieve good results if you channel sexual energy into creativity. So you can buy a painting by numbers, sign up for cutting and sewing courses.
Sign up for oriental dancing or even strip dance
“Literally the next day after the breakup, I signed up for strip plastic surgery,” Margarita admits. — The advantages of this leisure option are obvious.
Firstly, I throw out my erotic energy. Secondly, I’m learning to move beautifully. I can imagine how I will surprise a new man when I decide to have a serious relationship. There is also a nice bonus - a toned figure. Beauty!
VELVET
Why abstinence is dangerous
Sexual attraction is an absolutely normal phenomenon for humans. Hence the direct need to satisfy it.
Long-term suppression of sexual desire is harmful and dangerous to human health.
Women may face the following problems:
- disorders in the genitourinary system due to stagnation of fluid in the pelvic area;
- decreased immunity;
- irritability;
- chronic depression;
- hysteria, tearfulness;
- depression;
- stress;
- headache.
For men, the following consequences are possible:
- problems with the functioning of the genital organs due to fluid stagnation;
- impaired ejaculation and decreased duration of sexual intercourse;
- excess weight;
- chronic fatigue;
- depression;
- depressive state.
If you find yourself in a situation where there is really no way to satisfy your sexual need, there are several ways that will help reduce your libido for a while.
Avoiding aphrodisiacs
You can influence arousal by giving up a certain list of foods that nutritionists call aphrodisiacs. These include the following products:
- seafood, meat, eggs,
- alcohol,
- hot and spicy foods, seasonings, garlic, ginger, chocolate,
- honey, strawberries, nuts, avocado.
Despite the fact that there are many ways to relieve tension, you should not accumulate sexual energy in yourself. It has a very negative impact on a person’s health, psyche and behavior. If problems of this nature arise constantly, then it is worth thinking about the fact that the couple should put things in order in their personal lives and find a partner who will help get rid of sexual tension in the best traditions of the love genre.
