If the word “dominant” is familiar to many, then “submissive” raises more questions than answers. The two images were described in detail in the novel by E.L. James "Fifty Shades of Grey", who played a role in popularizing BDSM culture.
The topic aroused interest among those who read the book, as well as those who watched its film adaptation. But not everyone will delve into the topic - it is considered forbidden and even shameful.
What is a dominant in physiology?
Dominant is a persistent arousal; it necessarily acquires the significance of the dominant factor in the work of other foci. This center is capable of accumulating excitation coming from individual sources. It can also cause a process of inhibition in other areas, while they can no longer respond to the impulses that come to them. For example, in a burst of creativity, a person can completely forget not only about food, but also about sleep. Sometimes this leads to exhaustion of the body. This is an example of physiological dominance. The question remains, is this condition harmful?
There is such a thing as pathological dominants. This is an enhanced breakthrough in the central nervous system of the source of excitation. The reason for the formation of such a dominant can be stress, infection, or trauma. In addition, a strong emotion can provoke such a state: resentment, pain, fear or anger.
Unlike physiological ones, pathological dominants are harmful to humans. They limit its ability to adapt to the environment. Such a dominant contributes to the formation of conditions in the body that prolong or cause a relapse of the disease process.
Safety precautions7
During the “action”, responsibility for the health and life of the partner lies with the Upper One. But it is worth noting that Nizhny must determine in advance the acceptable limits of possible impacts in order to protect himself. Subsequently, these frameworks may change, but only with the consent of the submissive.
Also, during a BDSM session, “safe words” are used. This can be any word that the Saba uses to notify the Top to stop (or relax, if so agreed upon in advance) the BDSM activities. The dominant, in response to the safe word, must stop immediately. If the session takes place without such notifications, then the House bears even greater responsibility.
If you use equipment and practice incorrectly, you can cause injuries. Since it is the Top Partner who leads the process, he has the full degree of control over the situation. He must understand (at least at a minimal level) anatomical features and have some medical knowledge (first aid). When using devices, the partner must follow the safety rules specified by the manufacturer in the instructions. He needs to be attentive to his partner, careful.
In addition, if one of the “BDSM toys” or practices is used (for example, smothering), the Dom must have experience using it and understand the strength of its impact.
The principle of dominance
All moments in our lives create favorable conditions in which any one function or activity becomes more significant than others. This is the principle of dominance. This means that the performance of one specific important function suppresses other, less significant ones. Many examples can be given from the animal world. A cat, isolated from males at the time of heat, loses all interest in food and other needs. At this point in time, its dominant feature is the process of reproduction. And everything that is not related to this function is suppressed. This is sexual dominance. It is almost impossible to suppress such a state. Even the administration of bromide drugs will not affect the cat's behavior in any way. It is extremely difficult to erase a physiological dominant.
Tendency to dominate9
In “vanilla” relationships, there is also a tendency for one of the partners to take a dominant position. No matter how hard people try to seek compromises and achieve equality, more often there are couples where one partner (consciously or not) serves as the leader, and the other as the follower.
The distribution depends on certain characteristics in the couple. Each person is an individual, but dominant companions have several qualities that make them that way. Read interesting facts about male dominance at the link.
Doctrine of Dominant
According to Ukhtomsky, a dominant is a complex of certain symptoms that are detected in the body: in secretory work, in muscles, in vascular activity. It is important to understand that this is not a single focus of excitation in the central nervous system, but a collection of centers with increased excitability in various places in the brain and spinal cord and, of course, in the autonomic system. Ukhtomsky believed that dominants have the ability to transform into any mental state. Moreover, it is the prerogative of the cerebral cortex, this is a common property of the entire central nervous system.
Details of the dominant role2
This is the name given to a participant in a BDSM relationship who is the leading partner during the game (session, “action”). He dominates the other, which is manifested in orders, punishment, as well as tying up, spanking and other actions towards his partner. The Dominant is also called Top, Top, Master or Dom.
A person can simply pretend to be like this, or he can actually have peculiarities of his moral and psychological state that make him a leader in life. In the second case, such a person needs a companion of a submissive type, with whom a close relationship will be most comfortable. A true dominant will not be attracted to types other than the submissive. Then he needs a permanent submissive partner. Dominance in BDSM is the only comfortable state for him in close relationships.
Dominant of culture
The concept of dominance has also found its application in the cultural sphere. It reflects a general way of understanding and seeing the world, a person’s attitude to the social sphere and, of course, to nature. Dominance can take place in national culture. It helps to carry its foundations through generations, unified and unchanged. These are traditions, beliefs, national elements in clothing.
Of course, the dominant culture has a deeper meaning. It reflects the semantic unity of historical eras, determines the stability of thinking and worldview, and integrates society into a spiritual and semantic whole. In all historical eras, the life-orienting principle has been some kind of cultural dominant. In the ancient world it was a cosmocentric model. In medieval culture - Christianity, in the Renaissance - humanism. Currently, the dominant idea is the technological subjugation of the nature around us. Moments of change in the dominant occur under the influence of a dialogical encounter or as a result of creative variations of traditions. But meanwhile, such a breakdown always entails catastrophic consequences for the semantic unity of society.
Let's analyze the sensations
Femdom is often part of games with the aim of gaining new experiences. The woman takes on the role of mistress, and the man is completely subordinate to her. It gives both of them their own sensations.
In men
A man feels that he is making his woman feel good, and he himself is excited by new experiences. This feeling when he is bursting with excitement.
Among women
Dominant women gain power during such games, which significantly increases their self-esteem. They feel more confident and sexier than ever.
Examples of psychological dominance
Various examples of dominants can be given. For example, in women this can be clearly seen during pregnancy, lactation and especially at the time of childbirth. Another example is a person suffering from alcoholism. At the same time, the addiction is the dominant one. A person usually understands this, but alcohol gives him an imaginary feeling of relaxation and freedom. This becomes more important to him than his own health and clarity of mind. Another example is a workaholic person. All his thoughts are occupied by work. He does not react to his family, does not hear the indignation of his life partner. For him, material wealth is more important than family values.
What is currently more important for a person in comparison with other factors determines his actions and actions. He will follow the lead of his dominant, even if he himself does not like his own actions. This is why conflicts sometimes occur. Without realizing their dominants, people deceive and do not keep their word. They cannot pretend and go against their desires. Sometimes the desire to achieve something desired (a bottle of vodka, a new thing, a high position) pushes a person to commit a crime. At the same time, he finds an excuse for himself: “to get what you want, all means are good.” It is the dominant who dictates how a person should live.
Relationships between Upper and Lower4
When a submissive and a dominant meet and mutual sympathy arises between them, such a couple is called a thematic couple. The relationship between them takes on a 24-hour format. That is, they constantly live in such a way that one dominates and the other submits. In the BDSM community this phenomenon is called “lifestyle”. It is much less common than just sexual games of Mistress and Slave in BDSM.
“Ordinary” relationships that do not have a BDSM color are called “Vanilla” in society.
Lifestyle is characterized by drawing up a special agreement between the parties.
Maternal dominant
While expecting a child, expectant mothers experience a change in values and dominants. This happens under the influence of hormones. A very stable maternal dominant is formed in the body, that is, excitation gradually increases and is firmly retained in some specific areas of the brain. At the same time, inhibition occurs in other centers; what was previously paramount fades into the background. Due to emotional changes, a pregnant woman becomes more vulnerable and sentimental. She may get upset and even cry because of one offensive word.
As pregnancy progresses, a woman reconsiders her life. Old dominants are replaced by new ones. She thinks about how her life will change after the birth of her baby. A pregnant woman develops new hobbies and interests. She may start sewing or knitting, although before pregnancy she was not at all interested in this. All her attention, as a rule, is aimed at bearing and giving birth to a healthy baby. Maternal dominance has three forms: gestational, lactation and birth. But each of them is certainly connected with her child.
How to react if a woman dominates
There are women who sincerely believe that with a good wife, even a man can become a man. And then, from the first days of communication, she begins to literally creep out her chosen one, adjusting him to her internal standards by changing his hairstyle, manner of dressing and behavior in general. Like Papa Carlo, whittling out a male “blank” from the “blank” given to her – an ideal. The alpha male immediately sharply suppresses such attempts, defending his individuality. But simpler partners, especially those who are deeply in love with such a lady, obey almost immediately, turning into the anecdotal character of a typical henpecked man.
Subsequently, with the expansion of the family, the power of the wife, without weakening on the husband, extends to the children. Moreover, the moral and physical freedom of all subordinate members of this social unit is determined by the length of the “chain” allowed by the alpha woman. If she is smart, self-sufficient and has the common sense of initiative, then such unions are positive and can exist happily ever after. But in cases of open manifestation of despotism and waywardness, everyone in her family feels like servants, who are periodically sent to public execution, and at the last moment a manifesto for pardon is read out. Until tomorrow.
How men behave
For men, communicating with a strong, dominant woman can be interesting, but not easy. And here are several options for developing relationships.
- A confident and self-sufficient man can occasionally allow a woman to show commanding qualities. Just not in public and within the bounds of reason. Or he once and for all gently, but categorically and categorically, stops these attempts.
- A partner who is constantly told, like a dogma, “if it weren’t for you, we would be an ideal couple,” either one day, after prolonged humiliation, begins to defend his rights in a very harsh form, or silently leaves without a hearing. There is another option to try to “grow up” to the ideal invented by your partner, but this is difficult to do, because... The bar of requirements is constantly rising.
- The husband, with the humility of a ram led to the slaughter, patiently endures all the instructions of his wife, which become more and more demanding and humiliating every year. When visiting, they show him which piece of chicken he is allowed to take from a common dish, when he is with neighbors, they check whether he is using the right screw to repair the fence, and when he is with children, they notice that he is wearing the wrong T-shirt. Long-suffering, in this case, can be explained either by moral blindness, due to great love, or by an absolute lack of self-respect. Such submissive men always live in this atmosphere, until one day an epiphany comes to them, revealing to him his true, insignificant position in the couple. And then - either an explosion of emotions and parting, or a continuation of the usual type of existence, at which everyone around them laughs so as not to cry.
There is an unusual version of mutual existence in which a man, smart and confident, initially demonstratively supports the thesis: “my wife has one dignity - that’s me,” and accepts himself in an eternally secondary role. He is, as a rule, intelligent and well-read, has a good character and is considered a good conversationalist. But not in front of his wife. In her presence, he behaves as quietly and unnoticeably as possible. This is a skillfully adaptable beta type who has transferred all responsibility for the existence of the family to his wife, skillfully “playing” the role of a weakling.
Generic dominant
This dominant is formed immediately before labor. All the woman’s thoughts are occupied by the imminent arrival of the baby. The generic dominant is preparation for imminent changes in life. It has been noticed that a week before giving birth, the behavior of the expectant mother becomes strange. She either withdraws into herself, or, on the contrary, begins to engage in vigorous activity: she cleans the house thoroughly, washes all the diapers, and begins to pack her bag for the hospital. Even during contractions, she can, as they say, “get weird.” There have been cases when a woman, not wanting to give birth, for example, on the 13th, programmed herself so that her contractions lasted until the next day, after which she quickly and easily gave birth.
Levels of development
Femdom is a subtle concept. It is wrong to come to him quickly and spontaneously. Partners should prepare themselves, especially the man, since for him the image of a person who obeys may be unusual.
Elementary
Here a man is just learning to obey. He needs to learn to pretend to be a well-mannered person. He will always give a woman a seat, carry her bags, open doors for her. In this way, the man will gradually get used to doing everything to please the woman and satisfy her needs.
Higher
When a man goes through the initial stage and gets used to serving a woman, he becomes her personal slave. From that moment on, he listens to her in everything and unquestioningly follows all her instructions.
Is it possible to change the dominant?
There are different types of dominant - both useful, for example, the desire to be healthy and see your family happy, and harmful (smoking and alcoholism). However, it is quite possible to get rid of the latter. There are two ways to do this. In the first case it can be destroyed, in the second it can be replaced by another.
If the first method was chosen, then the person will radically have to reconsider all his life values and priorities. For example, if a person is unrequitedly in love, he will have to realize the hopelessness of the situation and, what is more difficult, accept this fact. This will require both willpower and time. But the end result will be positive. The dominant will be destroyed.
In the second case, it is necessary to replace one desire with another. For example, a person with a strong alcohol addiction decides to “quit” in order to save his family and job. In this variant, the harmful dominant is replaced by a more useful one. The result is complete deliverance from a harmful lifestyle.
Male dominance
Frankly speaking, a man’s dominance in a relationship, his dominance, is the most understandable, most common and correct position. Throughout the existence of civilization, in the upbringing of boys, in addition to studying various sciences and acquiring the necessary skills, great importance has been given to acquiring leadership qualities. With the simultaneous ability to bear responsibility for his decisions, which he made for the entire family.
This is a patriarchal, pragmatic and established model of the existence of the family as an important unit of society.
In the post-war period, when there was an acute shortage of physically capable men, women were forced to become the dominant part of society. But in our time, we still need to give the main positions to the stronger sex again.
Physiologist of the soul
The outstanding Russian scientist, thinker, physiologist, academician Alexey Alekseevich Ukhtomsky was born on June 25, 1875 in the family princely estate in the village of Vosloma, not far from Rybinsk in the Yaroslavl (then) province. His father was retired military man Alexey Nikolaevich Ukhtomsky, his mother was Antonina Fedorovna, nee Anfimova. In addition to Alexei, the family included two more sisters Elizaveta, Maria and an older brother Alexander.
When Alexey was a little over a year old, he was sent to be raised in the house of his father’s sister, Anna Nikolaevna, in Rybinsk, where he spent his childhood. Aunt became for Alexei, in his words, “the main educator and companion” until her death in 1898.
In Rybinsk, Alyosha studied at a classical gymnasium. But in 1888, without finishing it, at the insistence of his parents he entered the Nizhny Novgorod Cadet Corps, where by that time his older brother was already studying. There he met the teacher (in the future - professor) Ivan Petrovich Dolbnya, who had a great influence on young Alexei. “The teacher of thought,” as Ukhtomsky called Ivan Petrovich, was a mathematician, but with a broad outlook, he instilled in the student an interest in natural science. During the time spent in the cadet corps, Alexey mastered physics, mathematics, literature, psychology, and became interested in philosophy - the “science of geniuses.”
In 1894, on the advice of Dolbnya, Alexey entered the Moscow Theological Academy in the literature department. The scientist himself recalled his academic years as some of the happiest. The foundations of his worldview were laid at the academy; it was here that he began philosophical research: how to combine religion and science, reason and faith, history and individual experience in a single process of cognition, what are the general foundations of moral behavior, and what physiological mechanisms form a person’s personality. Ukhtomsky’s candidate dissertation “Cosmological proof of the Existence of God” outlined the scientist’s further research topics: the physiology of the brain, nervous activity and the physiology of behavior.
After graduating from the academy, Alexey Alekseevich decided to leave his church career and become a physiologist. And in 1899 he began studying linguistics at St. Petersburg University, and the next year he transferred to the Faculty of Physics and Mathematics. At the same time, he converted to the Orthodox Old Believers - a common faith that was widespread among residents in his native village of Voslom.
Since 1902, Ukhtomsky specialized under the guidance of Professor N. E. Vvedensky, and since 1909, together with him, he worked on antagonist reflexes. In 1911, in his master's thesis “On the dependence of cortical motor effects on side central influences,” the scientist first expressed the idea of a dominant
, the principle of which was developed in subsequent years. Over the next five years, he gave a course of lectures at the Psychoneurological Institute.
After participating in the All-Russian Local Council, at the end of 1917, Alexey Alekseevich went to Rybinsk and studied religious literature. A year later, his house in the city was nationalized, and in the fall of 1920 a search took place there, some of his belongings and papers were confiscated.
On November 30, Ukhtomsky was arrested and sent to the Yaroslavl political detention center and from there to Moscow to a special branch of the Cheka. A couple of months later, at the request of fellow scientists, he was released, but never returned to Rybinsk.
Since 1920, he headed the department of the Natural Science Institute, and since 1922, the department of human and animal physiology at Petrograd University. And from that time on, Alexey Alekseevich began to speak publicly with a new doctrine about the work of the brain, justifying the principle of dominance. In 1927, his monograph “Parabiosis and Dominant” [1] was published, which reveals the connection between the dominant and the attitudes of N. E. Vvedensky.
In 1935, Ukhtomsky became the director of the Institute of Physiology of Leningrad University, which he founded, and from 1937, the head of the electrophysiological laboratory of the USSR Academy of Sciences. In addition, Alexey Alekseevich taught physiology at the Institute of Physical Culture named after. P. F. Lesgaft, at the Psychoneurological Institute and at the working faculty of Leningrad University. In 1932 he received the V.I. Lenin Prize for scientific works. In 1933 he was elected a corresponding member, in 1935 - a full member of the USSR Academy of Sciences.
Throughout his life, Alexey Alekseevich remained a deeply religious person. “A monk in the world,” as he himself said about himself, secretly took monastic vows in 1921 with the name Alypius. He was an elder and a cleric, serving as a hieromonk in the St. Nicholas Edinoverie Church until its closure in 1923. It was important for him to convey Orthodox values and covenants of Christian love in his speeches and lectures: to serve others, to strive for understanding of each person, to be guided by mutual respect. Alexey Alekseevich survived the revolution, the civil war, arrest for religious propaganda, the threat of execution, and imprisonment. The most talented thinker of his time, he was extremely modest. He had a wide range of interests, spoke seven languages, painted icons, and played the violin.
In 1941, refusing to evacuate, he remained in besieged Leningrad, where he actively worked for defense needs and led research on traumatic shock. On August 31, 1942, Alexey Alekseevich Ukhtomsky died in his apartment and was buried on the Literary Bridge of the Volkovsky Cemetery in St. Petersburg.
Alexey Ukhtomsky is one of the largest physiologists of the Russian school, which was founded by I.M. Sechenov and N.E. Vvedensky at the University of St. Petersburg. It was there that the first ideas appeared, which in subsequent years were developed and transformed into the doctrine of the dominant.
The dominant for Ukhtomsky is a universal general biological principle, the physiological basis of mental life, attention, objective thinking, memory. In his works, the scientist gives different definitions of the dominant - they depend on the sphere of existence in which the phenomenon is being considered at the moment. From the physical side - “The dominant is everywhere the dominant excitation among others, and everywhere it is the product of the summation of excitations”
;
on the other hand, “...the dominant is the shaper of the “integral image” of reality...”.
Ukhtomsky was both a physiologist and a philosopher. In his research, he relied on the achievements and research of many sciences - mathematics, physics, astronomy, biology, history, sociology and even literary criticism. His teaching has a broad ideological character. In his articles, he was not limited to physiology, but drew numerous parallels and found connections with other areas of science and life.
Ukhtomsky believed that “the physiological is determined by the social...”. He connected the physiological principles he developed with issues of spirituality, and formulated several general laws of human moral development and personality formation. Dominants acquire particular importance, being “formers of the integral image of reality”, they determine the parties’ perception of the world. “Our nature is made,” Ukhtomsky emphasized. And through working on certain dominants, we can influence our behavior, educating and making ourselves better.
Subsequently, the doctrine of dominance went far beyond the scope of physiology, setting entire trends in philosophical anthropology and psychology. His ideas gave seeds and sprouted into numerous studies in many related fields of science.
Anna Shaposhnikova
