How to find your purpose and meaning in life in 13 non-obvious steps

Nowadays they talk a lot about purpose. Millions of people all over the planet are wondering: how to find their purpose?

I often receive such questions from my subscribers. Therefore, I decided to write an article for you in which I want to share why I consider the search for purpose one of the most important and urgent matters for every person. And also give some practical recommendations.

And here is the first hint for those who want to find their purpose and understand why they came to Earth.

How to fulfill your most important desire - to realize WHO I AM? >>>

Not long ago I read a book called “The Top Five Regrets of Dying People.” The book's author, Bronnie Ware, worked as a hospice nurse with dying people.

And she talked to them a lot. And the most important regret of the dying, those people who knew for sure that they would soon cross the line, was that they did not have the courage to live their real life. The life they dreamed of.

In other words, they understood that they were born into this world for a specific purpose. They had to do something great, and not just go with the flow and stupidly go through life, following someone else's rules.

How do you live? Are you just going with the flow or are you fulfilling your destiny? Most likely, if you are reading these lines, then you are still in search of yourself and your mission on earth.

And that's great. It's great that you are looking and not standing still. In this article we will talk about what purpose is and find out how to make sure that by the end of your life it is not excruciatingly painful that you missed your chance.

My history

I will tell you two stories from my life. I think that in some episodes you can recognize yourself.

I lived in a small provincial town. And always in the background throughout my days there was dissatisfaction with the way I was living.

It would seem that everything was fine. I was a little over 20 years old. I lived fully supported by my parents, I had my own room, beautifully furnished, and there was always something to eat. I didn’t spend money on food or housing.

I had a good job. I spent everything I earned on myself, on some desserts, goodies, on clothes, on cafes, and get-togethers with friends. In general, live and be happy, what else do you need.

Soon you will meet a guy, get married, move in with your husband, and here you have the normal life of a normal person in a normal city in Russia.

The work was interesting and during the working day I had no time to reflect.

But when I came home after work, I was just overcome with terrible melancholy. Nothing made me happy. I didn't enjoy going out with my friends. I was not happy watching TV series, films and the like.

I love my parents and have always been on good terms with them, but family trips to nature, fishing and the dacha did not make me happy.

Then I didn’t understand what was happening. But if any of you now tells me that you feel something similar, I will tell you what’s the matter.

But the fact is that your soul understands that you are not living your life.

You are not where you need to be. You're not doing what you were born to do.

.

Moreover, you can begin to feel this at different stages of life, both when you are still 18 and when you are already over 50.

The purpose of man and his role in society

The main criterion for inconsistency between the role and nature of a person is a variety of negative sensations while being in a role that does not correspond to human nature. It can be:

uncertainty, rapid exhaustion, anxiety shame emotional irritability feeling of misunderstanding internal discomfort inability to stick to a role constantly need for an outlet after being in a certain role emotional burnout

Most negative signs of an emotional state indicate a discrepancy between the role and the real nature of a person. Roles are defined by qualities and attributes that, when combined, produce certain archetypes. Hard authority is a leader, soft authority is a teacher. Combinations of various qualities give rise to roles; the list of them can be endless. Energy and aggressiveness - a warrior, energy and enterprise - a merchant.

Full compliance with the qualities that manifest themselves in the role and way of action allows not only to fully engage oneself in activities with maximum efficiency, but also to feel satisfaction from this. Satisfaction eliminates the need to somehow “heal” after your work or stay in society. This becomes a way of life for a person, one that heals itself, that does not hurt or deplete, although sometimes it requires rest to replenish strength, and not because of psychological problems. It is self-evidently worth the effort.

Listen to your inner voice

Many of us simply do not allow ourselves to listen to our inner voice.

In fact, each of us can feel that our destiny lies in something greater. It's not about where you work now or what you do. But in something more.

So it was with me.

And one day I boarded the Ulyanovsk-Moscow train with the feeling that I was doing what I should have done a long time ago. I understood that where I was going, something invisible was pulling me, something that we call the Universe. This is something that always invisibly guides us on our life path. This is what constantly guides you too.

Perhaps there may be some strong desire inside you right now to be someone, to do something, but most often you ignore it. Because you don't have time for this. You need to “go with the flow.” You need to earn money, you need to go to work, you need to visit your parents, you need, you need... There is no time to even think...

We are always looking for excuses for ourselves:

• I'm too old/young
• I do not have any special education/diploma,
• I have a husband/wife, children, grandchildren
• My city is too small
• There is an economic crisis in my country,
• People don't care and so on.

We give up our true purpose, our true destiny, which we signed up for when we appeared in this endless world.

Actually we are not just the body. We shouldn't just come and go from this world.

We are actually infinite intelligence. But we forget about this.

We forget about this infinite mind, which creates the infinite Universe.

After all, each of us has our own purpose in this Universe. We are an integral part of it.

So something pulled me to go to the big city. I had to come there, and not only to earn more money, or to walk around beautiful museums.

No.

Something happened to me at the age of 27. Then I didn’t know what exactly happened to me. But now I know it was the Universe. It was God, it was Divine intelligence, no matter what you call it.

On topic: How my intention came true last Thursday...

Vocation = pleasure?

It is important to understand what a calling is. Most people cannot find it because they are looking for quick and endless pleasure, which should be expressed, in their understanding, through work.

Vocation is very close to the Japanese concept of “ikigai” or the fashionable “getting into the flow,” but these expressions are sometimes misunderstood and lead people astray.

Ikigai is the core between enjoying what you do, giving back to society and the skills you have. Moreover, what is important is not one hundred percent pleasure from work, as many people think, but rather a combination of skills, drive and helping people.

If, for example, you are amazingly able to invent fluffy cockroaches, but they don’t want to see or buy them, and children don’t want to play with them, then this is not ikigai.

Who am I?

And then, leaving my quiet life, my family, I thought, who am I? What do I have to do?

From that moment my life began to change. I realized that we can all change our lives at any stage. After all, each of us sometimes feels that something is calling him, that something is moving him towards change.

When I moved to the capital, Moscow, my life could not be called good.

It turned out that the money I earn and the salary, which was twice as much as at my provincial job, is still barely enough.

Payment for a rented apartment, transportation costs and lunches in the office canteen took up half of all income. The work was just as stressful. Meetings with friends who also moved years earlier also returned.

It would seem that nothing much has changed. In the same way, I worked on weekdays and rode the bus to the office. Worked in the same company, communicated with the same people.

My parents and those who stayed in Ulyanovsk did not understand why I needed this move, because nothing had changed.

Yes, external life seemed to have not changed. But everything changed dramatically inside me. There was an absolutely strong feeling that I was in the right place. And this is exactly the city where I need to live in order to...

To realize your true
purpose .
I didn’t yet know what it consisted of, but the beginning had already been made. The melancholy left my soul, and I felt the taste of the great future to come!

At a closed meeting, I tell you how following your purpose helps you realize any desires.

And why, if a person lives someone else’s life, he is unhappy, even having a family, money, recognition >>>

It took about three more years before I felt sad again. Before that, I was busy organizing my personal life, buying my own home, working out and looking for the perfect job.

Again the routine sucked me in and I stopped listening to my soul.

But life was completely settled, work was found, and when everything settled down, I began to feel the same old unpleasant feeling again...

My experience

My emotional reaction began at point 116, after 40 minutes. But I suppressed it. It was in vain to write in a cafe - it’s not convenient to shed tears in public. I didn’t believe myself, I continued writing options for another hour until point 257.

№116. My purpose: to help others achieve their goals.

I came home happy, but confused - I started double-checking. Analyze life, compare past goals and desires.

A diary of goals and desires written down over recent years helped. The idea often pops up in them: helping others. 5 years ago I wrote down a global goal: to help others determine and fulfill their purpose.

“Everything fits, but it’s too simple”

– I thought. I searched and searched, and then I found it.

I repeated the exercise 3 days later, at home. At point 57 – it’s here again! Tears started, I didn’t expect it to work again.

Eureka! Is the search over? - No, they just started.

I decided for myself that since I hadn’t found it for a long time, it meant that I had to learn to live happily .

And now the time has come to fulfill the second part - work for the benefit of others. This site is the result of following my purpose. Even though I don't see the end goal.

Is this my purpose?

Months passed. And the feeling of dissatisfaction grew and grew inside me. Every day I came to work in one of the most beautiful offices in Moscow on the Garden Ring.

I inhaled the aroma of fresh flowers, which, as usual, was given to my boss. I worked with the most beautiful and successful woman from whom I learned a lot.

My salary was above average, and my bosses valued me, giving me a significant annual bonus.

But I was sad.

Do I really want to continue living like this? And continue doing what I'm doing? After all, I already know everything here. I'll do the same thing. I will be sitting in the same office.

And I asked myself the question: will I live another 60 years, or will I live the same year 60 times?

I realized that I simply couldn’t do this anymore. At this delightful moment, a feeling of freedom came to me. It was a realization.

I approached my boss and said that I would not be able to continue my work in the company.

We all know that we have some purpose. You already know that you have some kind of goal. You listen to all these impulses within you.

Most people live their lives as if under hypnosis. Most men and women do not live their lives as they were destined to. Only one person in a million feels the ability and desire to live life without going with the flow.

Most often, people obey public opinion, and not the laws of their own existence. And it turns out that a person lives under hypnosis. In some kind of hypnotic illusion.

He thinks that he is an ordinary simple person living in the material world.

But life, in fact, has other plans for us. In fact, you need to obey your own feelings, your inner instincts...

Only a life you love can bring you true happiness.

On the subject: How to become happy and why is it beneficial?

Why do you need to look for your life purpose?

The question of finding a life goal, just like the previous one, is very voluminous and multifaceted. But despite this, it is always viewed exclusively in a positive way. When a person has a clear life goal, he lives with the understanding of what his time is being invested in, that he is on the path to realizing what he wants, and this path is the right one. The goal fills his entire existence with meaning, which means there is a place for harmony and happiness in life. Having a goal, a person knows specifically in which direction to move. Making any choice in everyday life becomes easier, it becomes much easier to separate the important from the unimportant and discard the latter without regret. There is always motivation, you don’t need to force yourself to do anything. And if efforts are made to overcome your weaknesses and correct your behavior, then this is training that allows you to develop willpower and become stronger, and certainly not violence against yourself, as happens when you do everything while gritting your teeth.

A life goal is something that fills both a person and his life. This is what allows a person to walk through life with a firm and confident gait with his head held high even in the most difficult moments. And this is what allows him to come to the meaning of his existence and see even the most familiar life in a completely new perspective, as well as change it.

But reasoning is reasoning. They are, of course, good, but they may remain just a theory. And this, unfortunately, is the worst thing that can happen to a person looking for his destiny. To avoid this, you should use several recommendations that not only facilitate the transition from thoughts to actions, but also greatly simplify the search for your purpose and goals to which you can safely devote your life.

How to find your purpose?

So, before we get into practical tips for finding your true purpose, I want you to understand why it may not be that easy.

The fact is, there are several factors that can make it difficult to understand your true purpose.

1 factor:

public pressure can cause you to choose a path that is not the one you really want to take.

2 factor:

misplaced priorities. People often prioritize money and prestige over what they really want to do.

Although in fact, money and prestige will come if you do what you love, i.e. focus on your true goal.

3 factor:

people may sometimes think that it is too late (or too early) for them to find their true purpose. They may think that they are already too old, that they have already taken place in their current life (or, on the contrary, they are inexperienced, young for such searches). However, this almost always turns out to be untrue.

There is no time frame. It's never too late to start doing something that truly brings you joy. The thought that it is too late to do something is just another factor that holds you back from finding your true purpose.

Once you understand the reasons that are stopping you, you will be able to pay less attention to them and listen to your inner voice, to what is really calling you to the right path.

Fortunately, you and I are all born with an innate compass that tells us whether we are doing the right thing or not.

This compass is those moments when we experience happiness or joy.

If you feel joy when you do something, it means you are on the right path. If not, then it's time to change your course.

Therefore, by listening to your inner compass and learning to ignore external influences, you will realize that finding your true purpose is actually not that difficult.

A little about not having a life goal

The desire to find your purpose and life purpose is inherent, perhaps, in all people. But often, under the influence of various factors and circumstances, such as, for example, upbringing, the worldview of parents, the influence of the environment, imposed beliefs and ideals, the promotion of a certain lifestyle, way of thinking and everything that you need to have and want to have, lead to that people just lose themselves in all this. They seem to fall asleep, their whole life becomes unconscious and mechanistic, and their thinking becomes stereotyped and standardized. As a result, all questions concerning the meaning of life lose their relevance, fade into the background or are completely discarded as unnecessary.

If a person is still concerned about such topics, and he has not completely lost his individuality, selfhood and the feeling that he needs to strive for something or at least look for it, the answers to the questions posed above are often difficult to find, which often significantly darkens existence , creates a feeling of purposelessness of existence, becomes the cause of apathetic or depressive states.

The lack of a life goal has an extremely negative impact on a person’s life. This is the inability to fully reveal your personal and creative potential, and the duality of thinking and behavior, and the loss of interest in activities and in life in general, and real happy moments can be counted on one hand. You can endlessly analyze this topic piece by piece, but this is not what is important at all, but what is needed, and most importantly, you can come to an understanding of your true purpose and determine specific life goals.

How to find purpose? Practical advice

So, to find your purpose, you need to follow these simple but incredibly helpful steps.

Firstly

, you need to imagine your ideal life. If money wasn't your goal, what would you want to do with your life?

If you could live anywhere without any problems, what would you want to do with your life?

I want you to think about this very carefully because the answer to these questions is very important.

If you can imagine your ideal life and what you would do in it, then you will have a better understanding of your true purpose.

Secondly

, do what makes you happy.

Even if you are able to imagine your ideal life, there is a chance that you will not be able to achieve it right away.

I'm not saying it's impossible. But for some people it may be a little more difficult than for others.

But the point is, if you imagine your ideal life, you will understand what makes you happy.

And once you figure out what makes you happy, start doing more of it. It really is that simple.

You can start with a new job, a new hobby, or you can choose any other new direction. But always remember that in life you should do what brings you joy.

Third

, do what you are good at. Often, what you are good at and what brings you joy are one and the same.

It is very important to ask yourself the question: what comes easily to you, without any problems? What are you better at than everyone else?

By combining what you are good at and what brings you pleasure, you greatly increase your chances of success. Plus, it increases your chances of living a fruitful life.

Practical exercise

Now I want to give you a little homework.

You will need to think about your true purpose. Imagine that you live in an ideal world. Answer the questions:

• What does this world look like?
• What kind of people are there and how do they communicate with each other?
• How do you feel in this world?

Write your answers as present tense statements. And remember that an ideal world is one in which you experience joy.

And once you clearly set a goal for yourself, return to it every day and read. You may be able to change your world for the better with the help of a small circle of people: your family, friends and neighbors.

Then, you will need to close your eyes and begin to imagine your ideal world for a few minutes every day.

On the topic: What is visualization - we imagine, feel and realize a dream

In addition, do not forget to pay attention to the opportunities that appear before you that can help you create your ideal world.

Remember that nothing will change for the better until you start doing something yourself.

What am I willing to learn all the time?

We talk about a person “a doctor from God” not because he is attractive or likes to come to work in the morning, but if he treats better than most of his colleagues. But this skill does not just fall from the sky, but is acquired with great difficulty.

Vocation is the constant ability to be in the zone of proximal development , that is, where you know how to do something well, but you develop a little and constantly improve your skill with the help of others and learn new things. Like constantly climbing up the stairs. For example, a surgeon, knowing how to perform operations, travels and continues to study at conferences and seminars.

Therefore, the first question that is important to ask yourself when searching for a vocation is: “What am I willing to learn constantly?”

It's never too late

There is no better time than now to start making the most of your life.

And it doesn’t matter whether you are 16 years old or 60. It’s never too late to find your true purpose.

If you feel like you've wasted your time before, don't worry. This means it's time to make the rest of your life better.

Moreover, your experience, and your wisdom from the past, are invaluable resources. These are the ones you can use to build a better future.

And so, to understand what your true goal is, you need:

• Imagine your ideal life
• Find out what you like to do
• Do what you are good at.

Important! If you haven't downloaded my free book on how to make any wish come true in 30 days, grab it here >>>

After this everything will fall into place. And soon, you will realize that you are living the life you wanted. You realize that you are fulfilling your purpose.

Useful materials on the topic

Our article is coming to an end, and I want to recommend you a few useful things. Maybe they will help you better determine your calling.

The first is a career aptitude test. It was originally developed for schoolchildren, but it is also suitable for adults who want to change their field of activity and try something new. The test is completely free, go to the website and start testing right now. Your answers will be analyzed automatically.

The second is a test of cognitive abilities. It is relatively long, you will complete it within 30-40 minutes. In addition to text questions, the test contains a lot of games and visual materials. The program is designed to form the most complete psychological portrait of a person based on different types of data.

When you pass this test completely, the system will inform you about which areas of activity are most suitable for you, what type of personality and type of thinking you have, to what extent your attention, memory, thinking, speech and other skills are developed. The material is serious, developed on the basis of psychological experiments in which more than a thousand people from different professions took part.

This testing is already paid, it costs 1,450 rubles.

The third is free simulators from the Vikium project. These are programs that allow you to develop very different skills. Some simulators help you memorize foreign words, others help you speak better and expand your vocabulary, others improve your thinking abilities, others teach you how to count quickly, etc.

I recommend these machines to you for three reasons.

1. There are about a hundred of them. They are aimed at developing very different areas of your personality. If you study a few of them, you will be able to understand yourself much better. For example, foreign languages ​​are easy for me, but with mathematical operations and various calculations it is a little more difficult.
2. The simulators are divided into groups. For example, if you are especially interested in whether you can cope with learning foreign languages, you can look at the simulators in the “Text Abilities” tab.
3. They are completely free. Exercise for your own pleasure, even all day long.

Fourth – free webinars from Vikium. They are all devoted to the peculiarities of the functioning of our brain. Vikium holds them because teachers during the webinar offer to buy paid courses for the project. I’ll say right away that no one is forcing you to buy. It’s worth watching the webinars because they are very informative, not watery, and the material in them is focused on useful information, and not on advertising.

1. The brain is a superpower that you don't use.
2. The world is changing. How to keep up with him?
3. Secrets that weren't told to you.

Fifth – Vikium courses. They are not free, but very cheap, costing on average from 990 to 1450 rubles, no more. Pay attention to these programs:

1. Brain detoxification. Many of my readers have already purchased this course, there were no dissatisfied people, and there were no returns either. A course on how to get rid of all the negativity that fills your head. How to stop constantly returning to negative thoughts and memories, get rid of fear and melancholy, and start living a full life. In general, about the problems that absolutely every person has.
2. Think like an entrepreneur. The course will teach you to think a little differently than most people around you. You will learn how to switch from negativity to positivity, how to stop working for hire and create your own business. For those who are still in search of themselves, this is just the thing.
3. Critical thinking. Do you remember at the beginning of the article that I said that parental or social attitudes very often prevent us from finding ourselves? Critical thinking will help you get rid of them and look at the world “critically”. I think after this course you will decide exactly what you want to do and who you want to be in this world. The course contains a total of 9 lessons and two practical online simulators.
4. Goal setting. The course is about how to set goals, develop a plan to achieve them and follow the chosen path without giving up.

If you like these courses, here is a general selection with paid materials from Vikium, you can take a look and take note.

In general, I recommend that you register on Wikium, because this resource is 90% free. There you can buy nothing at all and still engage in self-development every day. New simulators, webinars are constantly appearing on the site, promotions are held, and informational articles are published. I personally registered two years ago, I constantly log into my personal account and look through all the updates.

On our website we have several selections with courses that teach online professions: copywriting, design, programming and much more. I advise you to skim through them to at least find out what online professions exist on the Internet today.

1. Courses for young mothers on maternity leave.
2. Courses on remote work.
3. Programming.
4. Copywriting.
5. Business.
6. Marketing.
7. Design.

And one last thing. There are two very large online universities in RuNet: Netology and Skillbox. They sometimes conduct completely free remote work intensives. Intensive is “intensive” in the truest sense of the word. For example, a programming intensive is when you program for two days from morning to evening under the guidance of a mentor. And from scratch, completely without basic knowledge.

Try one or more intensive courses. This is a chance to look at the world of a particular profession from the inside. Perhaps this way you will quickly decide on your calling.

1. Free intensive courses from Netology.
2. Free intensive courses from Skillbox.

All. I really hope that some of these additional materials will interest you and help you find your path in life.

What changed?

Nothing special. I am as happy as I was before I found my purpose.

Determining your purpose is like buying a subscription to a rocking chair for 10 years. Elementary. And working out in the gym 3 times a week is really difficult.

I thought that I would find the answer - everything would become simple and clear: take it and do it. But no. Fortunately, it just didn't happen. This is just another important step in development.

You need to get used to it - there will be uncertainty all your life. It is better to learn to love her and acquire a state of happiness in order to navigate this unknown.

The authors of books on self-development and coaches (life tutors) promise:

• “You will find your calling and make a leap in development:” <but I didn’t make the leap>
• You will reveal your talents and realize yourself in life . Yeah, just like that. To do this requires a lot of work and 7 years.
• You will make a powerful breakthrough . More like a pause to change the well-trodden rails of life to a new direction.
• You will wake up in the morning with a smile . I wake up the same way I woke up - with difficulty. I don't like waking up and running to work. When this happens, it means I couldn’t sleep, I was tormented by ideas.
• If you gain confidence, you will become more harmonious and cheerful . To achieve all this, you need to work hard, and not just go to a coach once.