- June 26, 2019
- Psychology of thinking
- Nechitailo Oksana
Do you need to think? Stupid question, right? It is not for nothing that man is given thinking. He knows how to analyze information, compare data and compose thoughts into more or less logical sentences. We constantly think: what to buy, where to go for the weekend, what came first - the chicken or the egg? But there are thoughts that completely spoil your mood and interfere with your normal life. Admit that sometimes you can’t sleep properly due to the abundance of thoughts. Just when you want not to think about anything, another nonsense creeps into your head like a snake.
We replay the events of the past day a hundred times, reproaching ourselves for thoughtless words or actions. Or we even remember that twenty years ago we borrowed a book from the library and still haven’t returned it. In a word, obsessive thoughts prevent us from living. Moreover, they can lead to constant stress, depression, irritability and insomnia. And all this affects the quality of your life.
Reasons for the abundance of thoughts in the head
Nothing comes out of nowhere. Everything has its own reason. The fact that an endless stream of thoughts rushes through your head indicates some difficulties in your life.
- Problems at work. What will the boss think? Why didn't your colleague invite you to lunch? Again, your salary is being delayed... You spend a lot of time at work, so you are constantly thinking about work problems or relationships in the team.
- Financial difficulties. No matter what anyone says, we are dependent on money. The fewer there are, the greater the anxiety. How can you force yourself not to think about anything if the loan repayment deadlines are running out?
- Health problems. When you have a disease, your body's functioning becomes disrupted. You are worried about your health. Hypochondriacs who like to give themselves imaginary ailments especially suffer.
- Failures in your personal life. Relationships (or lack thereof) also cause a flood of experiences. You are wondering how to arrange your personal life. Or you worry about them because of a quarrel with your loved one.
- Weather. The environment often has a negative impact on overall well-being. For example, if there is dampness and slush outside the window, the general emotional state may be disturbed, a person becomes immersed in gray thoughts and cannot relax.
- Intense mental load. If your work involves a lot of mental stress, then you can even go over work matters in your head at home. Often your body is in your bed, but your mind is still at work. The same applies to students during the session. They constantly think about exams and can drive themselves to mental exhaustion.
There are other reasons why different thoughts pop into your head. Often the reason may be some event that stirred your soul.
How to remove unnecessary thoughts and calm down? Use a few tips to help you not think about problems, calm down as quickly as possible and clear your mind of caustic thoughts.
Get started now
“I’ll start testing this sales channel later”, “I’ll work on this method of growing the average ticket later”, “I’ll think about this marketing tool later”, “I’m in a bad energy state right now, I’ll launch this product later”, “cool sales case - I need it implement later."
People are waiting for Monday, better times, lucky stars, a sign from above.
I give you a sign from above - start right now! Do something right now that you have been putting off for a long time. Put a clear deadline in your calendar for the next 72 hours to take the first step towards your goal.
Continuing the case of the student with the opening of the office - He went on reconnaissance to Moscow almost immediately after our conversation. He did this one day - he left in the morning by Sapsan, and returned in the evening. I collected a lot of useful information, visited competitors and looked for a place for an office. Based on what we collected, we made several hypotheses, which he began to test.
An example of how to start right now with a complete breakdown from Evgenia from Petrozavodsk:
I took action and opened my first business in a state of complete loss of strength. After a long illness, I sat with my mother all winter and watched TV series, and one spring I thought “to hell with it, let’s try,” since there was nowhere to go any lower, I just started doing it, and my appetite came while eating)... That was a year and a half ago and now I have two working businesses, the first (hairdressing salon) has paid off and is in the black, the second (coffee to go) is not yet).
Distribute what is important and what is not
Very often, a person who thinks about everything in a row stresses himself out over things that are not important to him at all. You have watched the news, which contains negativity from all over the world, and are already worried about a bus that overturned somewhere in Bolivia. Distribute what is really important to you and what is not worth worrying about. Whenever a negative thought enters your head, ask yourself how it applies to you. Introduce some kind of censorship and filter out unnecessary garbage that does not concern you in any way.
How to quickly relieve stress at home - sedatives
It is very useful to have light sedatives, such as valerian, in your home medicine cabinet. It is not harmful to health and helps to quickly calm a person’s nerves. However, remember, you can take valerian for no more than one week, after which you must definitely take a break for about fifteen days.
Take sedatives, preferably only during times of severe stress, and on normal days, it is recommended to drink simple infusions of medicinal herbs, which also calm the nerves. For example, tinctures from string or chamomile.
Replacing negativity with positivity
How not to think about anything bad? Just replace the negative with something good. For example, you made mistakes in a report and received a reprimand from your boss. Instead of exaggerating the situation and beating yourself up, come up with a new positive scenario. Imagine handing in a revised report and receiving praise from your superiors for your accurate work. Bring this replacement of negative to positive to automaticity. If negativity pops into your head, your brain will automatically correct it to something positive.
Your decision is never final
We tend to strive to come to a great, correct, final decision that will forever determine our future life. From a realistic point of view, this will never happen. No decision is final because conditions change and our perspective must adapt.
There is no single solution that will make our entire future life path the way we would like. This makes long thinking pointless. It is important to think critically before making a decision. However, do not get carried away by long thoughts. Accept that your decision may be wrong. Moreover, understand that life is a process of learning from mistakes.
Help from loved ones
If you have obsessive thoughts running through your head, you need to share them with someone. Not everyone can trust a psychologist. Yes, and this is not always necessary. Sometimes it’s enough just to talk to a loved one and voice your feelings. When you don't hush up your fears, but talk about them openly, you take an important step. You get rid of anxiety and mental stress. Having spoken out, you may notice that all your fears were far-fetched and there is actually nothing catastrophic. If you find yourself in a situation where you have no one to share your aspirations with, you can take a piece of paper and put all your fears in writing.
Take your mind off your problems
How can you not think about anything at all when you are locked within four walls alone with yourself? If you sit at home all day, then it’s no wonder that all sorts of nonsense pops into your head. Why not unwind? How about making an appointment with an old friend? Get yourself out into the street, immerse yourself in a crowd, meet someone you can tell about all your experiences. It is quite possible that your friend’s opinion will have a sobering effect on you. And being outside the house will help you take your mind off oppressive thoughts.
Water to the rescue
It has long been believed that contact with water puts thoughts in order. If you want to not think about anything, going to the pool will help you the best. Swimming relaxes the body and distracts from obsessive thoughts. If you don't want to go to the pool, just soak in the bath. After a hard day, give yourself some real relaxation, lie down in warm water. You can add flavored salt or essential oils. A contrast shower also helps. Believe me, after this procedure, bad thoughts will disappear without a trace. The easiest option (if you are at work) is to wash your face with cool water or simply apply a moistened napkin to your temples.
Meditation practice
Even a short meditation will lead your thoughts in a constructive direction. Of course, meditation still needs to be learned. But believe me, this practice will do some spring cleaning in your brain. If you don’t really want to meditate, you can simply do breathing practices. For example, before going to bed, when negative thoughts keep you awake, take a few deep breaths. Let them be slow and measured. To avoid thinking about anything, concentrate on your breathing as intensely as possible.
Let's grab the weights
Sport is also a great way to distract from obsessive thoughts. Are you scrolling through the events of the past day? Do twenty squats. Did not help? Make twenty more. Make it a rule not to sit still, but to move. When a person feels danger, he freezes. You do the opposite. Move your body, pump your muscles and drive your thoughts away. Carry weights, do exercises with a skipping rope. Jogging also copes well with a bad mood. Trouble at work? Grab your sneakers and run outside. But you don’t need to sit on the couch and dwell on negativity in your head.
Get organized
If you don't know how to learn not to think about anything, start cleaning up your home. The point is that your environment reflects your thoughts. If they are not in order, then there will be a mess around you. Make sure that every item in your home has its own place so that you can always find the thing you need. It is often said that thoughts need to be sorted into shelves. So, do the easier task first. Put things on shelves. The environment greatly influences your psycho-emotional state. Therefore, try to be surrounded by aesthetics everywhere. Pay special attention to your bag and desk. They should always be in perfect order.
Start with simple steps - once you gain momentum, it will be easier to move on
Among my students there are married couples where the husband and wife are involved in business. One of these couples, having received homework from me to test drive their dreams (this is a mandatory exercise in the Big Plans training course), went to look at 3-room apartments.
Having learned the cost of the objects they liked, they were at first saddened. According to the most optimistic estimates, it would take approximately 3 years to collect the required budget. The deadline did not suit them, but the idea of their own home captivated them.
They began to sort through the options and came to a brilliant solution: buy land and build a house. After thinking a little more, they came up with a 2-step scheme. Buy land, put up a temporary building on it (they have already found a contractor who is ready to build it in a month), move in there and calmly build a permanent house. The time frame was reduced by 3 times. The couple is now encouraged and the business has seen sharp growth.
Live in the present tense
Often we are haunted by ghosts from the past. We think that in that situation twenty years ago we should have acted differently. Stop beating yourself up for past mistakes. Live in the present tense. You probably have an interesting life that you really need to worry about, so stop chasing ghosts that don't exist. If you don't have enough impressions, keep yourself busy with something. At least start traveling. Let your old experiences be replaced by new positive emotions.
Take these simple recommendations into account. But remember that your success depends only on a sincere desire to get rid of negative thoughts. Stop reveling in negativity and live on the bright side of life.
Remove uncertainty: record your plans and make a schedule for their implementation
The first stopper of movement is the contradiction between the desire to eat the whole hippopotamus with a complete lack of understanding of how to do this. The mouth is small. I want a million a month, but I don’t understand how to do it yet and that’s why I’m standing still.
The first stage from which training begins at my school is the “Big Plans” training course. I teach how to cut a hippopotamus into pieces. I’ll tell you step by step how to specify your desires and create a business plan for achieving them. We are talking specifically about a business plan, since the main task of a business is to provide resources to fulfill the desires of its owner. We budget for the student’s desires and draw up step-by-step parameters for business development that will allow them to achieve these desires.
One of my students just opened a new office in Moscow. He had been nurturing this idea for a long time, but it happened after we sat down with him and outlined what steps and resources were required for this. One of the limiting beliefs that stopped my student was a large budget for implementation. When we laid everything out in detail and went through several options, it turned out that he was within his budget.
