Situations when a husband insults and humiliates his wife in life occur quite often. “Where are you going with your chicken brain!”, “Will you ever learn to cook?”, “Shut up and listen to what I’m telling you.” These are far from the most offensive phrases that women have to listen to. The cruelest words and obscene expressions are used. And every word resonates with pain in the heart. After all, this is said by a loved one who wants to be liked and receive love from him.
Women are exhausted trying to please the man they love. They try to look better, cook something tasty, arrange a romantic date, but everything is useless. The husband does not even seek to change his attitude towards his half. Insults pour in like from a cornucopia. Sometimes wives begin to think about divorce, but do not always decide on it, fearing problems or even greater aggression from the man. When a husband constantly insults and humiliates his wife, what should be done? How to get out of an unpleasant situation? Let's try to figure it out and find a way out.
Typical example:
“My wife is impossible to please. We have two children who go to school, we have been married for 10 years, we both work full time. No matter what I do, she is always unhappy, even if I try to do my best or give up things to do her errands. The list of tasks she writes to me for the week is huge. Very often I am the one who takes care of the children, taking them to school, taking them to classes.
I have to ask her several times every day how she is doing. At least once a week she gives me a dressing down. And during the day he can make several comments. This has been going on for about two years and I am very tired of it. I began to think that I couldn't do anything right. I let her relieve the tension by swearing at me.
Recently I went to football with my friends; it was the first weekend in six months that I allocated for myself. When I returned home, she was furious. Then she didn’t talk to me for a week. We decided to fix everything and went on a romantic date. But even there she could not relax. We ended up bickering over little things instead of enjoying our vacation.
Why does my wife scream and swear at me? How can I help her relax? All my friends are married, most of them do much less housework, and their wives hardly scold them. I also want to be happy, how can I get my old relationship back?”
Signs of hysterics
The hysterical wife is extremely selfish, she is driven by increased pride, attention to her person, the desire to be in everyone's sight and the desire to dominate her partner, suppressing his personality.
A characteristic feature of hysterics is the simulation of various illnesses, for example, migraines, in order to attract attention to themselves in any way and force them to fulfill their whims. Often, women show others unusual manifestations of their illness - fainting, seizures and other inhuman suffering.
Such women often start a scandal for no apparent reason, the purpose of which is to get what they want through blackmail and hysterics.
Knowing her husband’s weaknesses, the woman begins to put pressure on what hurts most, trying to make her dream come true. A man should not rush to blame a woman, since in most cases she is a hostage to psychosis and frayed nerves.
An attack of hysteria begins acutely and is expressed in the following symptoms: raising the voice, redness of the skin of the face, crying, sobbing, slurred, chaotic speech. The girl begins to scream, stomp her feet, and theatrically wring her hands. However, these emotions are clearly exaggerated. At these moments, they are characterized by deceit, dramatic behavior, and posturing.
Many women claim that when they are hysterical, they experience clouding of consciousness and do not remember most of what they said.
What does a psychologist say in such cases?
This is a typical situation in which both are to blame. It is understandable that you, as the author of the request, may say: “But she takes it out on me and gets angry much more often.” You may not even agree that this is your fault either. Okay, let her be the active aggressor and you the passive aggressor. But you both are pragmatic towards each other, and it's time to stop.
Accept as a fact that a family with two children, where both work full time, is a difficult case. This is objectively true. Love is a wonderful feeling, having two children is an amazing achievement. Having a job that you're happy with is also a great thing. But when you try to put it all together, there aren't enough hours in the day. And this happens not once a week, but every day. Until one of you collapses from fatigue.
Family psychotherapy
Psychologists studying the level of happiness among family people have noticed that at the age of 20 everyone says that they live wonderfully. Then everything goes in a downward direction until the bottom is reached at 40 or 50 years old. During this period, people feel especially unhappy. And then things gradually begin to return to normal, and happiness levels rise until they peak in their 60s or 70s.
What's happening? Children leave family nests. And both parents can again live for themselves, pursue their own hobbies, without looking at anyone around them. Life turns out to be calmer and more harmonious, the feeling of happiness returns again. There are fewer obligations, and spouses can focus on what they have dreamed about all their lives. They may return to old hobbies: going to yoga or repairing and restoring antique cars.
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Many families, even today, can afford one non-working spouse. But in the described situation this does not happen. Both are forced to work and raise children. The husband and wife have practically no time for themselves or for rest. That is, both exist in terrible stress and constant time pressure. Reactions to this stress can be very different, sometimes spouses begin to fight against each other.
Instead, they need to become a cohesive team, a reliable support for each other. And help restore strength, for example, by taking turns resting one day a week. It's quite clear where the battles come from. This is a war for limited resources: sleep, time for yourself, favorite hobbies. All this becomes an invaluable source of grace and peace, because this resource is lacking for both. Small children and work take up almost all the free time of each couple.
Cuckold humiliation
I noticed this couple immediately. During the first dinner. Arriving at this southern hotel, a few days earlier than my institute friends living in other cities, with whom we agreed to have a blast in the south. It just so happened that I had to arrive earlier and I didn’t quite know what I was going to do these few days while waiting for my friends. So, at the first dinner after checking in, I noticed this young girl and a guy. It seemed to me that they had also recently arrived. Quite young, twenty years old or a little over, slender, I would even say sexy. On the first evening, the girl came in very short shorts, so short that even the edges of her butt were visible from below. Awesome, smooth and slender legs. The top is a tight-fitting top, with protruding, pointed breasts. A smile was constantly on her face. But not a fool’s smile, but a very good-natured and radiant one. As soon as we met her gaze, I immediately read interest in me in those eyes.
The next morning, as I was leaving the hotel for my morning run, I ran into her. Apparently, she also ran in the morning, but that day she was already returning, and we just said hello to her. She nodded, smiling widely again. True, for some reason I was without a boyfriend. After running and washing, I went for breakfast, where I again saw this girl accompanied by a guy. After watching them a little, I noticed that they were behaving somehow strangely. It seems like a guy and a girl have arrived at the resort, but for some reason the girl measures everyone with such a lustful gaze. Maybe brother and sister? The faces seem a little similar. Even during the day, lying on the beach, I noticed how she sometimes glances in my direction. Towards evening, having ridden with these two and a couple of other vacationers in the elevator, I found out that they lived on the floor below me. At dinner I again noticed how the girl was spinning around and shooting her eyes. No, I definitely need to fuck her. How to avoid your brother?
The opportunity came the next morning. Returning from a run, I entered an empty elevator and this girl immediately ran after me. For some reason she pressed the button for my floor. The doors slammed and the elevator started moving.
-Are you right? You seem to be a floor below. — Immediately after the greeting, I said, smiling at the girl, and reached out to press the button one less, but was immediately stopped by the girl’s hand.
- Everything is fine. I was not mistaken. - Immediately my hand squeezed her small palm, the other hand, clasping her waist, pressed her to me.
The girl's arms wrapped around my neck and we merged in a passionate kiss. It’s worth noting that she kissed perfectly, passionately, pushing her tongue into my mouth and sucking mine. When the elevator doors opened on my floor, the girl’s legs were already hugging me above her butt, and I, holding her by the hips and ass, carried her out of the elevator. Fortunately, my room was right next to the elevator, and I didn’t close the door. Having brought the girl into the room and continuing to kiss, I immediately pulled off her training suit, and then my own. Laying her on her back, and being wrapped around her arms with her legs, I drove my instantly erect penis into the thirsty and lust-flowing womb of love. Having abruptly started fucking, I quickly brought the girl to orgasm, and I quickly came too, sticking my dick out and splashing her tummy.
Having finished, I fell down next to the girl, and lying on my side, catching my breath, watched as she smeared my sperm over her body with a joyful smile.
-What is your name, charming creature?
- Nastya!
- They gave you a beautiful name. And they raised you to be very slim and sexy, to be honest.
- Thank you. I am so pleased. Especially from you. It seemed to me that you immediately had your eye on me.
- But of course! Can't you notice such a slender cutie? At this point, half the hotel has already broken its neck, watching you. Did they specially assign your brother to you to drive away the fuckers?
- Where did you get the idea that this is your brother? This is my boyfriend. “Nastya looked mysteriously into my eyes.
- A…? But what about... Well, this... - I asked, not quite understanding what had just happened.
- My boyfriend, but I don't fuck with him. I'm not interested in him. Whether it's your business. Such muscles. — the girl ran her palm over my biceps, “And your “thing” is so solid.” I noticed it on the beach during the day.
Nastya’s palm hugged the shaft of my penis and began to lightly stroke it. Slowly he began to harden again. God, how nice it is.
- Do you want me to give you a blowjob? I like your dick so much and I love sucking such handsome guys.
Who would refuse? Of course I agreed, stood up and Nastya gave me an amazing blow job. After which, having rested a little, I fucked her again, but in a knee-elbow position. Apparently, the girl was satisfied, because while taking her to the elevator, I noticed that the smile never disappeared from her face for a moment. I myself was happy, because fucking this beauty was pleasant. She waved so passionately that I was turned on with a half-turn. Our second meeting took place on the same day, but later in the evening.
Straight from dinner, Nastya, standing in the foyer, not far from me, told her boyfriend that she was going to choose a book for the evening in the library, and she immediately indicated to me with an imperceptible other resting gesture that we should go to my place. That's arrogance. What kind of library does this hotel have? But since it is being carried out, then it is his business. Again we fucked for an hour and a half, after which Nastya, having had enough of my dick and being fucked hard, flew away satisfied to her place. The next morning, right after breakfast, before going to the beach, I again turned this girl on my dick.
Her boyfriend was already disgusting to me, since leaving such beauty unsatisfied is a sin for any man, especially one as young as him. This guy already disgusted me, although he seemed to be quite handsome. Therefore, when Nastya, in the evening, pulled me to her room, and did not come running to me, saying that she had sent the guy somewhere before midnight, I did not doubt anything, and was ready for any turn of events. As it turned out later, she deceived me too, not sending her boyfriend far away. And so, when I, sitting in their room, lounged in a chair, legs wide apart and enjoyed another blowjob performed by Nastya, who was located between my legs, the door swung open and her boyfriend walked in. Of course, the picture he saw immediately shocked him and he froze in the doorway.
- Why are you standing there? Come in. — I suggested to the guy.
- What are you doing here? — the surprised guy asked, staring at us.
- And you supposedly don’t see? Your girlfriend sucks me off. Or do you have poor eyesight? So don't be shy, come closer. Come on, be brave.
The guy took a few timid steps and approached us. Without taking his eyes off, he watched as Nastya pleasured me with her mouth.
- What do you like? Nice pacifier! You're lucky with the whore.
“But you... But...” the guy didn’t even know what to answer.
- Don't worry. And it’s clear that I like it. Surely you have long wanted to see how Nastya gives a blowjob to someone?
“You…” the guy, standing next to us, timidly tried to object.
- Shut up, asshole. Shut up and watch. Look how hard your dick is in your shorts. You probably want to jerk off now. Take off your shorts, jerk off your pussy.
The guy timidly shifted from foot to foot. It was felt that he wanted to object and at the same time the feeling of shame and humiliation greatly excited him. His hand twitched, rubbed his groin through his shorts, but then removed his hand as if he had been burned. Nastya, without releasing my penis from her mouth, continuing to suck and turning her head, looked at her boyfriend.
- Come on. Don't torment us. Look, even your girlfriend wants to see how you jerk off while looking at us. Come on, you idiot. I took out my nonsense and went to play.
The guy, trembling, put his hand into his underpants and began stroking his penis. He was shaking all over with excitement and disgusted humiliation.
- It’s a completely different matter! Well done! - I laughed out loud, then again looked sternly at Nastya. I already wanted to focus more on the blowjob and cum, so I turned to her, “Come on, bitch, tense up.” Do me good.
Pressing her head towards me with my palm, I managed to push my penis deeper into her mouth. The head poked into her throat, causing her to vomit. She gagged and whined, causing saliva to flow from the corners of her mouth and drip from her chin onto the floor. Tears flowed from the girl’s eyes and mixed with saliva. Wrapping her long, black hair around my palm, I began to poke my dick into her throat harder. The buzz was amazing. A couple of minutes of such thrusts and I, feeling an approaching orgasm, stuck my penis out of her mouth and began to splash her young face with warm sperm.
The sight of the finished beauty was amazing. The whole face is covered in sperm, on the mouth, on the eyes, a little got on the hair. Continuing to hold her by the hair and saying “Good bitch!”, grinning, I smeared clots of sperm on her young face with the head of my penis. I looked at the guy.
- What a good pacifier you have! What are you worth? Do you like to kiss her? Stop rubbing your dick. He quickly sat down next to her. Lick my cum from her face.
I had to push my doubting friend by pressing on his shoulder. The guy sat down next to his girlfriend. He doubts again and trembles. I pushed his head towards her face. He pressed his lips to her cheek, smeared with my sperm. Nastya straightened up and obediently knelt down, waiting with interest for the next steps.
- Lick the asshole. - I ordered him and slapped him on the top of his head.
He, at first with disgust, stuck out his tongue and touched Nastya’s cheek. He ran it over his girlfriend's skin, collecting sperm from her. Licked once, twice. The hostility had already left his face. Either he liked the sperm, or Nastya let him get so close to her for the first time. Relaxing more and more and getting used to the taste of sperm, the guy carefully cleaned the girl’s face with his tongue.
- And now him. Look how it shines. You need to suck it thoroughly and suck out all the residue. - Nastya nodded to her boyfriend at my dangling penis.
- Yes Yes! Suck out the residue and put it back into firing position. We need to fuck your lustful slut properly, since you can’t. — I joined in, shaking my pelvis in the direction of the guy’s face. - Take it boldly, be bold, sucker.
Nastya, holding my soft penis with her fingers, pushed her boyfriend’s head towards me, pressing on the back of his head. He, succumbing to the desire of the girl he loved, opened his mouth in disgust. When his lips closed on the head of my penis, his face contorted into disgrace. But, pushed from behind by Nastya’s hand to the head, he began to make sucking movements. He sucked harder and harder. Cheeks sunken.
- ABOUT! Fine! You're sucking well, puppy. Keep up the good work. A little more and my dick will be ready. And you Stushka, become a crustacean for now, please me with the view of your ass.
Nastya, sparkling with sparkles in her eyes, quickly jumped onto the bed and stood on the edge, so that her feet remained hanging over the edges of the love bed. She spread her legs wide, stuck her butt out, arched her back, put a pillow under her breasts and pressed herself against it. Having jerked her buttocks a couple of times, Nastya imitated the movements of the twerk dance, inviting me.
You could see how lubricant was already oozing between her labia. Her boyfriend, with his mouth, had already brought my penis into a fighting position, so I got up from the chair, took a step towards Nastya, but when I stopped, I suddenly wanted to grab the guy kneeling next to me by the neck and press his face into his girlfriend’s leaking crotch . When I let him go, he pulled back, his entire muzzle smeared with the juices of his beloved. Grinning, I pushed him away with my foot and grabbed Nastya’s buttocks. With a sharp movement forward, I drove my hard penis into the slippery vagina. The girl, biting her pillow, squealed. And I continued my movements, fucking her sharper and deeper. She moaned and groaned happily. At the same time, the guy sat next to me, confused, and watched as I fucked her. Without stopping my thrusts, I turned towards him.
-What are you staring at? Why aren't you helping?
- How? - a question in his eyes.
- How how? Lick her heels, asshole! — I joked, “Come on, get started.”
The guy got on all fours behind me and started licking his girlfriend’s heels.
- Oh! Oh! Oh! What a thrill! - Nastya screamed, - God! How nice it is when your heels are fucked and licked! More more more! Do not stop! Now the second one!
And I continued to fuck and fuck her. Having licked the sole of his girlfriend’s second foot until it shined, the guy began to suck her toes, taking them one by one into his mouth. He sucked them, ran his tongue between the fingers, which turned Nastya on more and more. It seemed to me that she even came a couple of times, squealing heavily and twitching unnaturally. After which I wanted her boyfriend to lie under her. I stopped and told him what to do. He lay down with his face under his girl’s pussy and when I started fucking her again, my penis entered five centimeters from his eyes.
He clearly heard her vagina squelching, my swinging balls hitting him in the face, juice flowing from the labia, pouring straight into his eyes, into his mouth, and flowing into his nostrils. He held his girlfriend by the hips, his penis stood like a stake. Nastya, in ecstasy, fumbled with her palms on the sheet, then stared at his groin and suddenly suddenly grabbed him by the balls, plunging her claws into his scrotum. The guy howled in pain, leaned up with his face, pressed himself into our genitals, and at that moment Nastya was rocked by a powerful orgasm. She shook, she convulsed, she crushed her boyfriend’s face, splashing him.
I stopped while the girl was shaking. We didn't move for a minute. Finally, Nastya, moving forward, got off my dick. She fell onto her back, regaining her breath. The head of my penis just fell on her boyfriend’s lips.
- It wouldn't hurt to suck! — I ordered the guy with his face splattered with Nastya.
He began to suck me without disgust. I moved him slightly to the edge of the bed, his head hung down, and I was able to push my dick deep into his throat. He choked, suffered, but endured. Every time he pushed his cock in, his throat swelled. But it didn’t last long, I was too excited. A few pushes and I stuck my dick out and came on his face.
- And beauty! Bliss! — watched as my sperm flowed onto his face.
And Nastya lay next to her and looked at it all, smiling, quietly stroking between her legs with her fingers. When I accelerated, she nodded at her friend’s erect penis and asked:
- What are we going to do about it? He is still a human being after all.
- What about this? — I thought quickly, “That’s where we are now.” Help me.
With strong hands, I pulled the guy off the bed, placing him upside down, resting his neck and shoulders on the floor. Nastya asked to hold his legs up. The guy's butt was resting on the edge of the bed. And the penis was just directed into his mouth.
- Open your mouth. Open it up and jerk yourself off.
The guy obeyed, but he didn’t have to jerk off for long. One, two, three, and from his penis, his own sperm splashed into his mouth and face.
Finished. They released his legs. Lying there, finished. Whimpers. Nastya hangs herself around my neck, and when I sit down on the bed, she climbs onto my arms. I start touching her, stroking her legs, feeling her, until we kiss passionately for a short time. Then she moves away and purrs:
- We had such a good time today. You are so cool to me! I hope we will continue in the same spirit tomorrow?
- Why not. Only tomorrow my friends are coming. Some of them with their bitches and goats. Let's have some fun with the crowd. You probably don’t mind, Nastyushka? We'll put you on a couple of dicks at once. We will fuck you and you will immediately suck. I hope, you like it. - Nastya nodded, - I think you’ll find something to do, too, you schmuck. And you will work with your mouth and something else. — I turned to the lying guy.
Wife problems
What is the wife's mistake? Instead of looking for the causes of stress, she focuses on the symptoms: irritability, fatigue and other unpleasant feelings. And she begins to blame her husband, who is unlikely to be the source of stress.
She begins to perceive her husband as her slave, as an employee. She cannot talk to him calmly and openly. She does not want to discuss with him possible changes in life that will allow her and him to rest more and regain strength.
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She works her butt off, and when she feels that she has absolutely no strength left and there are still many unfulfilled tasks, she lashes out at her husband. It's mildly offensive and the wrong way to communicate. When she screams at her husband, she experiences release. But it hurts him, which can be bad for the relationship.
The wife in this situation needs to realize that the very fact of a ten-year marriage is not an excuse for such behavior on her part. The husband did not undertake to be her slave; he has a choice: leave or stay. He may decide to stop being her punching bag.
It is important for her to understand that there are no situations in which she is always right and her husband is always wrong. She needs to get to the bottom of it and understand what drives her into a state of frenzy. And change these circumstances, and not throw out your dissatisfaction on the person who is trying to support her.
Who are these hysterical women?
They are called women with emotional swings. One moment she is calm, smiles at those around her and looks like a child, but literally a few minutes later she turns into a beast that rushes and rushes for no particular reason. Either a real princess, at whose feet you want to lay the whole world, or a fire-breathing dragon, from which you want to run.
These are real hysterics who have problems with self-esteem. When she is in a suspended emotional state and experiences elation, she should not be praised; when her confidence falls, she turns into a huge bundle of nerves. A woman throws hysterics and scandals with or without cause, but after a while she becomes calm.
There are several signs by which you can understand that your wife is hysterical:
Why even get involved and build a family with such women? It’s easier to get away from the shocks and find a balanced wife. But if a bitchy woman is a beautiful, smart, successful and interesting person, then the man will be very tempted and will not be able to resist the lady. In such cases, a man should know a few rules for taming bitches.
Husband's problem
So, the wife constantly yells at her husband for doing everything wrong. What is he wrong about? He is not her employee, and does not have to act as if he works for her. The husband needs to stop reacting like a subordinate. And take the position of an equal partner in the dialogue.
He's a grown man, why does he need a to-do list? Does he have no eyes? He is not able to assess whether it is time to do the laundry, whether there are dirty dishes, whether he needs to pick up the child after school? People do these everyday things without focusing on any lists, automatically. Whatever problems they see in front of them, they eliminate them.
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It is very strange to hear from a man who feels like a cornered horse that his wife is “not relaxed enough.” Do you think she's tired of the difficulty of managing a grown man?
What to do for both
If you recognize yourself in the description, read the recommendations and understand that this is about you, conduct an experiment. Write down everything you do around the house on a piece of paper. Be petty, learn all the nuances down to who takes out the trash and changes the toilet paper roll, who wipes the children’s noses and pours tea into everyone’s mugs.
Then, on this list, highlight all the things, all the items that you do for yourself, and not for your wife or children. Let your spouse do the same. If betting could be done in such cases, most experienced psychologists would bet that the wife's list is much longer than her husband's. There is no need to guess here: whoever gets more tired is more likely to break down.
Quarrel at a psychotherapist's appointment
Try another experiment: switch roles for a week. If your wife used to tell you what to do all the time, now it’s your turn. Ask for whatever you want: buy beer, bring tea, run to the store, put money on your phone. Let her serve you in addition to her standard to-do list. Then ask each other questions.
- Did she manage to complete all your instructions?
- Did she manage to hold out for a week?
- Did she manage to hold out for at least one day?
- Did she manage to do everything right? Or did you also have to make comments?
Find out the reason for the tantrums
Hysteria is a way of getting what you want. Two types of women regularly throw tantrums:
- spoiled in childhood.
If the parents spent little time raising the girl in childhood, fulfilled her every whim, did not teach her to overcome difficulties and help around the house, then she begins to resort to hysterical fits already at the age of 3, if her parents do not buy her a toy or take her to kindergarten, and with age her selfish antics only intensify.
- patients with neurosis.
If in childhood a girl was calm and obedient, then the manifestation of hysterics with age may be one of the types of neuroses. Some psychologists call hysteria the first degree of insanity, especially if it is accompanied by streams of tears, simulation of fainting, headaches, heart attacks and threats to commit suicide. In this case, when the first symptoms of hysteria appear, you should call a doctor and give a calming injection.
New time
The era of the 1950s has passed. Then the ideal family was like this: the husband worked, the wife stayed at home. She could spend 30 minutes choosing the best tenderloin in the store, and had time to wash and cook everything. After all, she didn’t have 2 hours after work to do this, but the whole day. She didn't have to spend 40 hours a week working in an office.
Now it is fashionable to live differently. Both work, and they do it for the privilege of having much more money than they could. But for some reason it is believed that women still have to do everything, and at home too. The children must be looked after, the apartment cleaned, dinner prepared.
In our grandmothers' youth, a man who was willing to take his wife's to-do list and do something about it was considered a hero. This was an exception to the rule. Everyone said: “Look at him, he’s so progressive, he doesn’t even complain, he allows his wife to run errands for him.”
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In modern generations, this type of behavior is no longer considered progressive. Husbands are called henpecked, and wives are called aggressive bitches. Start living as equals.
The man who wrote the complaint with which the article began should start living for himself. He needs to remove phrases such as “helped with the children” and “helped around the house” from his vocabulary. He didn’t help, but did what he had time to do, insuring his wife, who will do something for you next time while you are late at work.
In the current family there are no male and female responsibilities, with rare exceptions this is true. Whoever has time takes the children out of school. Whoever can come early organizes dinner. Teaching children to do homework will be a good help.
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From primary school onwards, they can clean their room or wash the dishes. Moreover, there is no need to hand out any trophies shouting: “Wow, you did it yourself!” In a family where both parents work, children should learn self-care skills from an early age.
The wife in this situation needs to learn techniques that allow her to relax and control her anger. These can be simple breathing exercises. Having spent a couple of minutes on them, she will not lash out at her husband and will not destroy a relationship in which both are having a hard time due to simple fatigue. No one should yell, insult or give negative feedback. This must be done in the interests of both, in the interests of the family.
It will be difficult for a wife to overcome this behavior if she has been using swearing and swearing as a way to reduce her stress levels for years. But you need to understand that she does not receive anything good in return. As a rule, after scandals there is only a feeling of sadness, loneliness, fatigue, and sometimes a feeling of guilt.
The impact of tantrums on the family. How to live with a hysterical wife
Many men don’t know what to do if their wife is hysterical. Not every representative of the stronger sex is ready to tolerate such emotional outbursts in their family. Most men want a family in which there will be peace, mutual understanding and harmony. Living with a mentally unstable partner is simply unbearable for many. If a girl behaved adequately before marriage, and after marriage began to regularly show hysterics, sooner or later the same outcome awaits her:
The man will immediately leave her.
At first, the husband will try to understand the reason for the hysterics and try to calm his wife down. But even the most patient husband will not be able to withstand such regular shaking, so divorce is inevitable. Only some husbands can tolerate an unhealthy situation in the family and accept a woman for who she is.
A man who really wants to save his marriage should stock up on endurance and patience, since this problem cannot be eliminated quickly.
Family therapy
This small analysis of the situation and recommendations on how to fix it will not help everyone. For most people, the article will only give food for thought, but will not allow them to move forward. Sometimes the transition from a relationship from the plane of “I’m the boss - you’re a fool” to equality is very difficult to make. Here you need the help of a family therapist or psychologist.
You will say that it is difficult for you to decide and go to a session. You can answer that it is most likely much more difficult for your wife to restrain herself and not yell at you than to get ready and go to a psychologist. You are not your spouse's enemy, and she is not your enemy. You are two people, tired, unhappy, stuck in a typical relationship mechanism that leads to a breakup.
Eliminate this mechanism, start building relationships on a new foundation. Take responsibility for this, change your behavior, give arguments that will force your wife to start communicating with you openly and without unnecessary emotions. You can understand that both you and she can handle this. But it will be better if you do this together, rather than bring the situation to the point where the easiest solution seems to be separation.
The wife is hysterical. Is there a way out? Learn to ignore and remain silent
If you truly care about your wife and you have a child together, then you should try with all your might to save the marriage. To do this, you will have to be patient and persevering. As the saying goes, what a person “absorbed with his mother’s milk” cannot be changed by anyone.
Tantrums are theatrical performances by an “actress” who has no special education. Therefore, the hysterical person is afraid of publicity and throws tantrums only in the presence of the people closest to her. In order for her husband to fulfill her whim, a hysterical wife can bring him to a nervous breakdown, but she herself always controls her behavior and, despite her terrifying appearance, does not feel any shame. She easily calms down and can even ask for forgiveness if her husband gives in to her and she gets the desired result.
Even if you cannot completely ignore the hysteria and go to another room so as not to become a participant in the performance, do not succumb to provocations and do not allow yourself to be manipulated. Don’t let the hysterical person drain your energy, try not to be a participant in the theatrical performance, but remain only a spectator from the sidelines.
Let rude words and insults pass your ears, as if they were directed not at you, but at the theater hero, which fortunately you are not. If the screaming, crying and yelling suddenly turns into death threats or assault, call 911 immediately. This is already a nervous breakdown and your wife needs a sedative.
