Although the bedroom is the one place where people should be with someone they can completely trust and feel completely at ease with, for many women it is the place in the home that causes the most stress and anxiety. Being naked, literally and figuratively, makes her vulnerable. There is nothing to hide behind in the bedroom - and this causes discomfort and anxiety. Many women wonder how to stop being shy and relax in bed? Sexologists know the answer!
Reasons for shyness in bed
What makes the topic of sex so difficult? The reasons are different for every woman, but here are the main three:
- Low self-esteem. If a woman does not respect and value herself, it is difficult for her to open up to her partner. Sometimes a woman's worst enemy is herself. It is important not to let your inner critic bring you down.
- Lack of experience. Every time a person finds himself in a new, unfamiliar land, he takes the position of an observer, not a player. It is important to understand: in order to learn something, you need to try to do something. Anxiety can be caused by a partner’s extensive sexual experience - there is a fear of being worse than a former lover.
- Negative previous experiences with romantic relationships. This factor certainly affects current relationships. You should try to let go of the past and start over.
It doesn’t matter why a woman is nervous in bed, what’s really important is to know how to loosen up and stop being ashamed of her body. Yes, this can be fixed! Moreover, for this it is not at all necessary to seek help from specialists. So how to unleash your inner sex goddess?
RELATIONSHIP BASE
Everything happens through trust. Trust is the foundation of a healthy relationship between a man and a woman. The woman relaxes and is able to let in sensual experiences and accept what the man brings her. In turn, he is inspired by a woman and is ready to move mountains for her.
Misunderstanding of the roles of men and women in relationships creates confusion. The guidelines are confused, it is unclear who can give what to whom and what they should be like.
Mutual concentration, the desire to meet halfway, discuss openly exciting issues, share impressions and dreams - all this contributes to the development of trust and intimacy between people.
It is important to be able to switch from yourself and your worries to the experiences of your partner. Enjoy the fact that you are loved and desired, that this man is with you. What a thrill it is to truly belong to your man. Enjoy the moment when you can be relaxed and protected under his protection.
…I clearly remember that I never wanted to try sex. There was no attraction, no desire... what else can you call it. In general, all this was not at all interesting to me.
Now - every time is like the first time, every time incredibly sensual, tender, close, desirable, frank... We can voice any secret desires to each other, even the most wild or funny ones... Whatever you want to get, you can get. And you are not ashamed, you are not afraid. You can just trust and enjoy….
Orgasm……! Yes, he exists. And not just one)) and not even three at a time! And the more, the faster they come, the brighter and the more emasculated you become...... it’s all incredible. And it’s as if it’s not happening to me. I have NEVER experienced such a thing, I have never known such closeness and revelation. This is the best thing that can happen between a man and a woman. Trust, emotional connection and intimacy...
Anna V., designer, Ufa
Tip #3: The perfect body – fact or fiction?_3
Extra pounds, scars and birthmarks - all this makes people not only unique, but shy. By the way, how girls feel about men’s scars is in the article at the link. It is important to let go of your shortcomings and understand the following: no partner is perfect. Nothing prevents a woman from experiencing sexual arousal at the sight of an imperfect male body, so why can’t men be attracted to women with “imperfect” bodies? You should stop comparing yourself to other people and try, if not to love, then at least to accept your body!
How to relax and stop being shy in bed
The connection between a man and a woman is the best thing that can happen. She inspires both to live a happy, joyful life, to achieve heights, to become better.
It's not a shame to love. It's scary to live life without ever surrendering to the arms of love.
Tightness is the opposite feeling of opening and happiness.
It is with the man you love that your happiest moments can happen. Both in bed and in life. Sensual trust. Laugh at a movie, hug tenderly before bed, take pictures while walking. Merger, intimacy is when both experience strong impressions; you are not alone in this process.
The integrity of a couple is not only in bed, but also in life itself - you are together. A fulfilling sexual relationship is possible, and let it become a reality.
...Sexuality has always been a taboo topic for me. And in many ways painful. Without answers to unspoken questions. After the training, I learned to accept myself, understand my reactions, desires, experiences, what is important to me in order to experience trust. Where I previously intuitively tried to resolve these issues through some external attributes, now I understand on a deeper level of relationships with a man. The results have no precedent: my tensions and anxiety went away, I opened up as a woman in a new way...
Diana K., doctor, Tartu.
Author Maya Rozhko
Editor Tamara Tkachenko
Proofreader Anna Sorokina
The article was written using materials from Yuri Burlan’s online training “System-vector psychology”
Tip #4: Feelings_4
For those who are concerned about the visual aspect of sex, sexologists recommend focusing on the sense of touch: closing your eyes or turning off the light - this will help you forget about appearance for a second and enjoy the moment.
It is important to try to feel with every cell of your nerve endings the sliding of your partner’s fingers across the skin. Pleasant tingling sensations, wet kisses, hot breath - you should try to listen to your body in order to get maximum pleasure from sex, forgetting about any embarrassment.
Becoming sexy with the help of natural stimulants
Becoming sexual with the help of natural stimulants is simple, because their action reduces nervous tension in the human body. G Female has an excellent stimulating effect. It quickly activates blood circulation in the reproductive and genitourinary systems, causing strong sexual arousal.
The product contains high-quality organic components that have a gentle effect on the human body. G Female helps to increase the duration of sex, combats chronic vaginal dryness and improves the overall well-being of the patient.
Rendez Vous are drops based on natural ingredients designed to stimulate the organs of the reproductive system. The effect of the product appears five minutes after administration and lasts about four hours. The drops have not only stimulating, but also anti-inflammatory and antibacterial properties. Their active components have a positive effect on the state of the nervous system.
Forte Love is a modern stimulant in powder form that helps you become relaxed and confident, improves the functioning of the circulatory system, and also increases the level of sensitivity of the zones. The advantage of this drug is its powerful composition of natural ingredients, which improves the functioning of the reproductive system. By taking the product regularly, the patient has the opportunity to easily and quickly normalize her well-being.
Tip #7: Brainstorm_7
You can try to make a list of all your worries and worries - what causes embarrassment and uncertainty? Having listed all the factors, you need to think about how they can be eliminated.
To avoid feeling helpless, you should also make a list of all your positive qualities that inspire confidence. They should serve as a kind of reminder.
The use of female pathogens
The use of female pathogens is effective in cases of permanent or episodic decline in sexual function. The mechanism of their action is to stimulate the process of contraction of the smooth muscles of the vagina, as well as to activate blood flow in the pelvic organs.
Such drugs help to increase the tone and elasticity of the soft tissues of the vagina, increase the sensitivity of erogenous zones, and restore the functioning of the autonomic nervous system. Under the influence of pathogens, a person’s physical activity and endurance increase, and sexual intimacy lasts longer and becomes as sensual as possible.
Silver Fox Price: 1300 rubles=»cost»>
Spanish Front sight Price: 1250 rubles=»cost»>
G Female Price: 1250 rubles=»cost»>
For example, let's take Spanish Fly drops. They cause strong sexual desire, acting within five to ten minutes.
The product effectively combats various forms of frigidity, is suitable for women of all ages and is not physically addictive. It contains natural ingredients. That is why the drops have a small number of contraindications and adverse reactions.
Where does discomfort come from?
You can solve any problem and get rid of discomfort, however, before doing this, you should try to find out what exactly provoked the fear of intimacy and reluctance to open up to your partner.
According to sexologists, women's fears arise from childhood and teenage psychological trauma, for example, from unsuccessful first sexual intercourse.
The girl’s improper education on sexual relations and her lack of awareness on some points is also the reason that in the future she cannot fully open up to her partner.
It is extremely difficult to solve such problems alone; a conversation with specialists is often required.
Sports and liberation3
If a girl has obvious problems with her figure, then it is absolutely normal that she withdraws into herself and is afraid to undress in front of her partner. There is only one way to solve this problem - by starting to visit the gym and watching your own nutrition.
Unfortunately, it is impossible to solve the problem of excess weight, especially if cellulite has appeared, in a couple of days, therefore, in addition to working on your figure, you also need to get rid of embarrassment.
Sometimes this problem can be solved by wearing beautiful, shapely underwear.
However, you should not repeat the mistake of many girls and hide in the dark, because for guys this is not the best way to make love, and they, not getting what they want, begin to look for what they need on the side.
Buy beautiful underwear
Don't forget that many men consider a woman in beautiful underwear to be the peak of sexuality. By the way, with the help of this piquant wardrobe detail you can divert his attention from the problem areas of your body.
» /> Remember, if a man chose you, it means he already likes you, and you should not focus on your shortcomings with your behavior. Our advice and the attention of your beloved man will help you with this, since it has been proven that this is what works wonders for a woman.
Source: miridei.com
Emphasize your strengths
Ask your boyfriend or husband which part of your body he likes best. Believe me, there will be one, so don’t be embarrassed.
If he thinks your breasts are beautiful, then make it a rule to walk around with cleavage. He likes your legs - buy erotic lingerie, black fishnet stockings, with a red lace top and show off your legs in all their glory. He will be absolutely delighted, no doubt about it.
Show off your own charms every day and by the time you get to bed, you yourself will forget about what you were embarrassed about. Show off your body in the best possible light. The best indicator of your sexuality is the passionate look of your loved one.
How to become a feminine and attractive girl
How to increase self-esteem
An effective way to increase self-esteem is to achieve results in a matter that interests a person. For example, if you are interested in sports, you need to get a medal or lift a lot of weight. In this case, self-esteem will increase by itself. There is also motivational literature that you can find and study.
Self-esteem can be corrected even on your own
Not long ago, one of my friends asked how free I felt in bed with a man. The question itself, to be honest, surprised me, but then my friend continued: “I control and restrain myself all the time. It seems to me that some crazy creature lives inside me, and if I let it out, the man will be scared.”
Perhaps all this would be funny, but personally I’m sad for us. Our own complexes prevent us from “releasing” some “crazy creature” into the wild. The statistics are that 60% of young ladies are dissatisfied with their shape, 20% with their skin and the same number with their hair. Because of this, many are afraid not only to loosen up in bed, but even to undress in the presence of a man. How to relax in bed with your loved one and get rid of self-doubt and enjoy sex?
Defeating complexes
One of the main reasons for our constraint is the stereotype that, supposedly, men want to see 45 kilograms of bones in bed, instead of curvy and appetizing forms. Where we got such a “clear” idea of male preferences is unclear, however, ask any man you know, and he will tell you that he would prefer a girl who “has something to hold onto” to a skinny model. And this is not at all surprising, because even for me, Beyoncé, whose measurements are far from the standard 90-60-90, evokes much more desire than Kate Moss.
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Ask any man you know, and he will tell you that he would prefer a girl who “has something to hold onto” to a skinny model.
Little tricks
If I still couldn’t convince you that your forms are beautiful, no matter what they are, use little secrets for greater self-confidence.
For example:
Resort to a little visual trickery; Apply a self-tanner or go to a solarium. Tanned skin always looks sexier and more perfect than pale skin. In just a few sessions, both options will hide your imperfections, and your skin will look even more even and smooth.
You can also “tweak” your figure with the right accessories. Focus on those parts of the body that you consider advantageous. If you have slender legs, wear stockings; if you have a pronounced hourglass figure, emphasize it with a corset, and decorate your thin and beautiful neck with beads or a necklace.
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If I still haven’t managed to convince you that your forms are beautiful, no matter what they are, use little secrets for greater self-confidence
Always be beautiful
In everyday life, we often do not pay attention to what tights and underwear we are wearing; When getting ready for work, we grab the first thing in the locker, and this is very wrong! We deserve the best and the most beautiful, even when there is no reward in the form of sex waiting for us in the evening. All items of underwear and wardrobe that do not cause you much enthusiasm, please donate them to charity. Wear only the underwear and clothes that make you feel desirable and sexy. Don't dress for someone else, be beautiful for yourself.
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Any items of underwear and wardrobe that don't excite you, please donate them to charity
Express your desires
Let me return to my friend’s phrase - “It seems to me that some crazy creature lives inside me, and if I let it out, the man will be scared.” Remember at least one man in your life who was afraid to speak openly about his sexual desires. I don’t remember a single “timid” person on my journey. Talking to your partner about sex and what you want in bed is a MUST. Moreover, a man will be happy if you share your desires with him. In fact, he himself will never guess what you like and what excites you. Such heart-to-heart conversations often help you relax and feel more confident.
All our problems exist exclusively in our heads, and in order to liberate ourselves, it is enough to start with the simplest things. Let go of your fears, remember that there are two of you in bed, and no matter what happens in this bed, your duty is to have fun. Once you realize this, you're halfway to great sex!
Author: Marina Biniashvili
Author of the article: Pink.ua
When knowledge is lacking
If a girl doubts her own intimate powers, she will have to raise this issue. After all, without communication and verbal contact, you will never know whether you are doing everything right, what your boyfriend likes and what he doesn’t. And also, you will not be able to share your own impressions and change the moments that irritate you.
But if the embarrassment is stronger, try to improve your own knowledge and bring new things into your intimate life. Specialized literature, of which there is plenty, will help with this. And sensitive questions will disappear by themselves.
It is possible to overcome shyness; it is important to simply step over the line of shyness once and trust your partner. After all, only by achieving complete relaxation will you get maximum pleasure from relationships and not only intimate ones.