Quite a lot of people often experience communication problems without knowing how to learn to live with them. Surely, every person remembers cases when they were overcome by shyness and timidity, an almost panicky fear of saying something “unnecessary”.
It also happens that in the presence of some individuals it is easy for a person to develop a conversation and even joke, although this is completely out of character for him, but just being around others is a true test. Thanks to today's article, we will try to learn how to always be a pleasant, cheerful and interesting person.
Rejoice often
Man comes to this earth to have fun. It was in the Middle Ages that people thought that earth was hell, and that heaven awaited people in the next life. Today this assertion is highly questioned. How to become cheerful and cheerful? Take a closer look at your life and learn to appreciate it. The average healthy person can find reasons to be happy every day. For example, good health, the opportunity to do what you want, a job you love, wonderful friends, a loved one nearby. All this becomes so familiar that a person takes the pleasant aspects of life for granted. Learn to appreciate every moment and understand that tomorrow you can lose what you don’t value today. Therefore, thank fate every evening for giving you a happy destiny, and for the fact that it gives you wonderful gifts that you accept with joy and a smile.
Complement and develop someone else's joke.
In KVN, the “Warm-up” competition is structured in this way, where teams come up with a funny ending or beginning of a pre-prepared phrase.
The answer to the question “How to learn to joke” is stored in the jokes of friends or acquaintances. Let them think for us what is interesting to say, and we will come up with our own based on their phrase.
For example:
- He gives her the last shirt.
– What do you think she should do with an old sweaty size 52 shirt?
Take the self-esteem test
Don't beat yourself up
Problems that may haunt you today will soon be resolved. There is nothing eternal in this world. So don't beat yourself up. Do you want to become cheerful and cheerful? How to achieve the desired result with the least amount of effort? Stop beating yourself up. Just because you play out all sorts of situations in your head, life will not change. Many people are used to imagining the worst possible scenarios that the event could take before an important event. This is not worth doing. Let go of the problem. If you cannot influence the outcome of events in any way, then do not take them to heart. If you have the power to change something, then change it. A person who does not worry about trifles does not undermine his nervous system and, as a result, lives much happier than people who cannot bring their raging feelings under control and calm down in time.
Let go of the past
How to become cheerful and cheerful? Many people cannot accept their past. Mistakes made several years ago have left a feeling of guilt that haunts a person on a constant basis. Try to understand that the past cannot be changed. To live happily, you need to accept all your mistakes. In the future, you will try to avoid them and will no longer make rash actions. But it is impossible to change anything in your past. Therefore, stop mentally replaying situations in which you do an action differently. Watch any movie with a time travel theme. For example, "Butterfly Effect". The example of the main character clearly shows that no matter how you change events, the result will be the same. Understand that if you had not done what you did, you would not have become the person you are. Mistakes teach people and make them stronger, wiser, more experienced and nobler.
How to stop being afraid of people?
The first step that needs to be taken on the path to change is to stop being afraid of people, since it is this phobia that becomes the cause of “closedness” and shyness. You can learn this by:
- workouts at home. Imagine that you have to do something that you have always been afraid of - speaking in front of an audience, a group of people. Prepare the phrases you will say and the questions you will ask. Improve your voice and diction.
- memorizing jokes. You will never be able to become a sociable person if you don’t know how to joke, be self-ironic, know or be able to come up with a funny story for a certain life occasion.
- smiles. Just smile in difficult times - and you will feel how the constraint, which makes it very difficult to become different, will slowly fade away. Pay attention to those nearby, perhaps they are no less afraid than you, support them with your friendliness.
- hearing and hearing. Treat others with as much sensitivity and consideration as possible, be sure to demonstrate your own involvement with phrases that support the conversation, and, if possible, never answer sincere questions from others in monosyllables. At least a few simple details, even if you don’t always want to talk about anything.
Start keeping a schedule
A good mood is the key to success. There are many ways to improve your mood. One of them is planning. A person who keeps a diary lives productively and rationally. If you want to improve your life, then start writing yourself to-do lists from today. How will they help you become happier? A person who keeps everything in his head cannot enjoy life to the fullest. A person’s walk down the street is accompanied by thoughts about preparing dinner, doing laundry, and checking on the children’s homework. People don’t have time to enjoy great weather and flowers in their flower beds. If all your tasks are listed in a diary and tied to specific hours at which tasks need to be completed, you will not be burdened with unnecessary thoughts. What is written down on paper can be safely forgotten. There is no point in keeping all your affairs in your head; they will look great on paper. And you will be able to see the world around you in all its glory.
Positive thinking
When trying to gain the reputation of an interesting and cheerful girl, it is important to think positively. You need to educate and develop in every possible way the ability to see something positive, good, or at least something worthy of a smile in everything.
The simple truth that laughter prolongs life has not yet been canceled. Smiling cheerfully and cheerfully, it is easier to live and overcome all adversity.
The easiest way to instill positive thinking in yourself is to constantly look for the good around you and in the events in your life. Moreover, you need not to be lazy, constantly reminding yourself of this.
Alternatively, you can even develop mini-quests for yourself, for example, find 5 reasons to smile in the morning or make 5 people laugh in a day. Tasks like these add color to everyday life. After some time, you won’t even notice how humor will become an integral part of your life. And habit, as you know, is second nature.
Humor and positive thinking can transform anyone in the eyes of others. Having mastered them, you can be sure that you are considered not only funny, but also a very cheerful girl with whom it is interesting to spend time.
Don't pay attention to the opinions of others
Do you want to live happily? Doing things that you have a passion for can significantly lift your mood. But many people hesitate to do what they love for the reason that they do not find the approval of others. For example, a person wants to draw and enjoys sketching. But parents and friends do not approve of the desire for creativity. They say you can't make much money from drawing. Do you want to be in a good mood all the time? Don't listen to the opinions of others. If you have a desire to be creative, do it. A person lives once, and he does not have the opportunity to try several life scenarios to understand which one is correct. In order not to regret wasted time in retirement, do not be afraid to think with your own head. In this case, you will have to take responsibility for your actions, but you will not have to share the joy of victory with anyone. Your success will be well deserved.
TOP 7 steps to improve yourself
A person develops while he lives. Every minute he receives a flow of information, benefits for himself, and strives to become better. If this does not happen, then the personality gradually fades away.
Love yourself
Nobody knows a person better than himself. His needs, capabilities, desires, etc. Therefore, selfishness in its healthy manifestation is self-love. Only on your own will you create a comfortable zone, move towards your goals and take care of yourself the way you want. But don’t get sick with narcissism, everything is good in moderation.
Develop yourself
Get creative, make new acquaintances and friends, travel, read books, watch online or go to offline trainings. All this helps in development and gives confidence. You will be able to maintain a conversation, find new friends and like-minded people. Personal growth will tend to move upward in stages.
Raise your self-esteem
To create a confident, full-fledged personality, you need to sensibly assess your qualities and abilities. If a person underestimates or overestimates them, this leads to external pressure or loss of connections.
To assess your capabilities, write down your positive and negative qualities, and start working on yourself.
Pump up the first ones, improve them, try to grow, and work on the second ones and eliminate them. If you can’t learn it on your own, then try contacting a qualified specialist or read books on psychology.
Don't be negative
Negativity attracts everything bad that can harm or offend a person. No one wants to communicate in negative tones; everyone wants to distance themselves further. Get rid of it.
Work with your thinking, tune in to a positive wave. When thoughts change, the perception of the environment will also change for the better, then good things will be attracted by itself. After all, a lot depends on how reality is accepted.
Choose your environment
Communicate only with those people with whom you are easy and comfortable. If the conversation goes “through gritted teeth” and nothing meaningful comes out, it is better to end the conversation with such interlocutors by wishing them all the best.
Be active
In a company or in a one-on-one conversation, you should not remain silent and hide in a corner. Take the initiative, support the conversation, suggest an interesting and relevant topic. This will make you noticeable.
Stay focused
When talking, do not get distracted, stay focused. You may miss important information, the interlocutor will think that the dialogue with him is uninteresting, and will perceive this situation as disrespect for his person.
Do charity work
A happy person does not save money in a chest under his bed. He is not afraid to give away what he has and believes that fate will give him good dividends for such good deeds. Don't be afraid to be an altruist, do charity work. Helping people is pleasant and rewarding. By helping someone who is in a difficult situation, you become a better person. Every person came into this world in order to make it better. So you need to justify your existence. Charity is one way to increase your karma without making Herculean efforts to improve the world.
Play sports
How to become cheerful and cheerful? Useful advice that will help any girl become a better person is to immediately go in for sports. The modern pace of life does not leave many people time for the gym. But you can exercise not only in the gym, but also at home or in the yard. Exercising improves your body, eliminates extra pounds and cellulite, improves stamina and makes you happier. During sports, a person’s brain is filled with oxygen, and as a result, the person begins to think faster and better. It was not for nothing that our ancestors believed that a healthy mind lies in a healthy body. The outer shell is a direct reflection of a person’s inner world. If a person is happy, he will be beautiful, and if his face is distorted by grief and melancholy, no amount of cosmetics will make the person more attractive.
What mistakes should you avoid?
To become a person who makes a favorable impression and to live freely, and not in the grip of constraint, it is necessary from time to time:
- limit contacts with pessimistic people;
- learn not to remain silent during a conversation;
- live without voicing banalities and things that are obvious to everyone;
- joke or say something without hypocrisy;
- always try to conduct a conversation with a person exclusively “in his language”, in other words, find an individual approach to each interlocutor;
- do not believe the opinions of others about others, but simply be able to determine your own and draw the necessary parallels.
Make your loved ones happy
How to cheer yourself up? Surprise your friends more often. Giving pleasant gifts or creating a festive atmosphere for no reason will lift the spirits of your loved ones. And as you know, people treat you the same way you treat them. The more often you delight your surroundings with pleasant surprises, the more you will feel the gratitude of your loved ones. Don't be afraid that your imagination will run out. When a person does good, the imagination works flawlessly. Remember, the more positive you bring into this world, the more it comes back to you.
Laugh more often
Laughter is the cure for any problem. Moreover, when you laugh, the body produces substances that can dull physical pain. So instead of being sad and despondent, try to look for as many reasons as possible to sincerely smile or laugh heartily. Just look around. There are many reasons to laugh. You just need to learn to notice them.
Get involved in your education
How to become an energetic and cheerful woman? Start filling in the gaps in your education. How does intelligence level affect happiness? A person who knows a lot will never get bored in his company. He can always find something to do to his liking. Reading a book, watching an educational program or simply talking to yourself will be interesting to the person. A poorly educated person cannot be alone with himself. She needs someone who will entertain her. TV, social networks or friends help a person feel complete. But such a person will not be happy. Why? Each person has his own happiness. Some people want to start a family, others want to realize themselves in their career. And the joy of a poorly educated person will be consumption. Marketers have been selling emotions, not products, for many years. And a stupid person buys them, and then is surprised at yet another deception.
Find a hobby
To live happily, you need to be passionate about something. Not all people have hobbies and work as synonyms. Work should be something you love, but it doesn't have to be passion. For example, a person can happily work as a hairdresser, and in his free time he can breed dogs. Animals and caring for them will be a huge part of a girl’s life. Psychologists say that you need to smile more often. Cute doggies will help keep a lady's smile on her face.
How does a person live without a hobby? Boring. And if a person also has a job he doesn’t like, then life can become unbearable. You definitely need to find an outlet for yourself. Find an activity that inspires you and practice it as often as possible. And remember that watching TV and TV series, as well as sleeping, are not hobbies.
Add new facets to your personality
It is generally accepted that boring people have a narrow outlook. They are meticulous, pragmatic, and rarely agree to adventures and activities. Because of communication problems, they constantly worry and think: “People are bored with me, what should I do? How to behave? And at this moment another problem begins - they learn jokes, try to be “in trend,” but it turns out ridiculous, and everything only gets worse.
I recommend that you first become more interesting to yourself, broaden your horizons, gain new experience and knowledge. It's an organic way to stop being boring. Here are some ideas:
- Read. This can be any literature that interests you. Classic novels, fantasy, plays, poetry. A well-read person is always more pleasant than someone who has seen nothing except posts on social networks.
- Travel. Traveling around the world is wonderful, but even a trip to another city is enough for positive impressions. New experiences will be an excellent basis for an interesting conversation.
- Find a hobby. Your hobby will help you meet new acquaintances and also provide an additional topic for conversation. People who are passionate about something seem more charming to us and create the impression of a deep personality.
- Visit unfamiliar places. Restaurants, social events, exhibitions, concerts - all of these will expand your worldview and develop you. No matter how much you love a certain dish in a certain place, don't pass up the chance to try something unusual.
The more new things you learn, the more things you will have to talk about. But boring people, due to their meager life experience, tell the same thing over and over again, fixating on one subject, which makes the interlocutor yawn.
Communicate more
Do you dream of becoming joyful and positive? How to achieve this? Talk to people more. Books are a good teacher, but direct interaction will teach you more. People are an endless source of knowledge. Learning from a person is much easier and faster than learning the basics of some science on your own. By communicating with people, you broaden your horizons and learn other points of view on problems that did not seem so obvious to you. The wider your social circle, the richer you are. Today you can make friends anywhere in the world. You can learn about many cultures from their native speakers without leaving home. Learn languages and talk more with foreigners. This way you will be able to understand the world, which, it turns out, is not as simple as you thought about it.
Joking with a purpose.
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How to become funny and be the life of the party? The answer is simple - make sense of your jokes, fill them with purpose. The audience needs a victim, a specific object of humor. It can be an absent person, an internal enemy, a famous ruler, or some generally recognized vice. The most popular objects for humorous attacks:
- Geographical: city, country, people
- Relatives: lovers, mother-in-law or mother-in-law, neighbors
- Celebrities: high-profile personalities or current news about them
- Sports: football team, coach
Love yourself
A person who wants to become happy must love himself. A confident person who knows her strengths and accepts her shortcomings makes a good impression. If a person loves himself, then he will look good, speak well and be satisfied with his own life. A person who lives for himself and does not save money to meet his own needs is, according to statistics, more cheerful. And making others happier is easier for those who themselves experience true pleasure from every day.
How to become a cheerful and interesting girl? Don't skimp on yourself. Dress nicely, go to a beauty salon, eat from the formal service and do what you want. Don't prove anything to anyone and don't accuse anyone of anything. Plan for the future and don't cling to the past. Try to see something good in every day. Living in such a rhythm, it is very easy to understand that life is truly beautiful.
Signs
Sociability is a personality trait. Usually they use this one word and do not think about its content. Meanwhile, several elements of sociability or signs of a sociable person can be identified:
- Openness. This is the ability to talk to everyone and about everything, talk about yourself, openly answer other people's questions, directly express personal opinions, etc.
- Sense of humor. This is a positive attitude towards the world, and the ability to laugh at oneself, and the ability to skillfully apply irony, insert a joke, tell an anecdote.
- Talkativeness. This is not talkativeness, but the ability to speak beautifully, clearly, coherently and competently with any people and in any conditions, including the ability to communicate in the “language” that is more understandable to the interlocutor (for example, in his slang).
- Determination. Communication always has a purpose. Communication itself is a means. For example, the goal may be to resolve a conflict or establish a useful contact, make acquaintances, exchange numbers, find a job, etc. A sociable person knows exactly what he wants, why and what he is doing. This distinguishes him from a chatterbox.
- Confidence. Another quality that is closely related to sociability and determination. Only a self-confident person can express and defend his opinion, be open and honest. Only those who are not afraid of being rejected, criticized, unnoticed, and misunderstood can be sociable.
- Restraint. A sociable person knows how to not only speak, but also listen. And what’s more important is that he knows how to think before he says something. A sociable person always takes into account the psychological characteristics of his opponent, the conditions and context of communication, the nature of the relationship, and much more. The ability to show mastery of tact, take pauses, not interrupt, etc. helps to find common ground with the interlocutor, establish contact, and maintain communication.
- Plastic. A sociable person always and everywhere feels at ease and quickly adapts to circumstances.
- Creativity. This is closely related to all other signs. A sociable person will find an approach to any other person, regardless of the time, place and context of communication. He knows how to hook someone in personal communication, by phone or in correspondence. But let's not forget about determination. If a person does not see the point of hooking someone, then, despite all his creativity, he can behave very mediocre and restrained.
Is it possible to understand from the outside whether a person is sociable or not? Yes, and it's quite simple. If he is not afraid of new acquaintances, unexpected meetings, phone calls, personal meetings, trips to government agencies, etc., then the person clearly does not have problems with communication.
Where exactly do these problems come from? Let's take a closer look.
