A mistress is almost an obligatory companion of every man. And absolutely every wealthy man - for sure. But the search for a mistress is fraught with risk. The main thing is that your wife doesn’t burn you. Even if the wife is a common-law wife. How to find a mistress - read our article!
Now there is a lot of debate on the Internet on the topic “Can a woman be called a mistress if her man lives with another woman in a civil marriage?”
On the one hand, without a stamp in the passport, there seem to be no obligations. But if you look at it, the essence of this situation is the same - betrayal.
I always advise women to understand the reasons for their partner’s infidelity; perhaps certain problems in your relationship .
Why do women need to understand? Yes, because men do not like to analyze and delve into themselves. It’s easier for them to go “left” and get the missing emotions.
It is a mistake to believe that husbands have affairs just for sex. Some men live in two families for years, and it is unlikely that they do this only because of the variety in bed.
In any case, if the husband began to cheat, it means that there are problems in the relationship and they need to be solved, and not hushed up.
I'm not the morality police, so I won't shame or judge anyone. If a guy feels uncomfortable in a relationship, but his conscience or finances do not allow him to leave his family, then you need to seriously think about how to find a mistress for a married man without anyone finding out about it.
If you see a way out of this situation only in treason, then you need to do so as not to hurt anyone. Your women, no matter how many there are, should not know about each other. Make sure that they do not know each other and never cross paths, even by accident.
Now you are faced with a certain task - to understand how to find a mistress for a married man, so as not to regret your choice. This is what we will do.
Where to start looking for a mistress for a married man
When starting a new relationship, a man must be prepared for the fact that there will be additional expenses, courtship, flowers, gifts. Mistresses need a unique approach, because their partner cannot promise them a happy future, a family and a fairy tale. Such women understand that for married men they are only temporary consolation and variety. It’s worth trying to make this time happy and bright.
READ A dish that is served cold, or how to take revenge on your husband’s mistress
When a family is faced with misunderstanding or lack of attention to each other, the relationship gradually breaks down, and the spouses think that they need to seek consolation on the side. Men have no choice but to find a mistress with whom they can spend pleasant evenings, satisfy their emotional needs, and relax.
Internet dating
If you are wondering where to find a lover, pay attention to the option of searching through social networks. Nowadays, you can easily register on a dating site and find several worthy interlocutors on the very first evening.
Virtual communication reveals a person from different sides, so through pages on social networks you can find out in advance about a woman’s requests, needs or wishes. Many are ready to become mistresses only for material gain. You need to be able to identify such girls in advance.
Other people's wives
Sometimes a man says to himself: I want to have a mistress, but I don’t know where to find her. The option of searching for a mistress among friends is far from in last place. Look around your friends, take a closer look at the girls who show sympathy and attention to you when they meet.
READ How to become an ideal lover for a married man: rules and mistakes
If a woman’s eyes show interest, attraction and a desire to continue communication in an informal setting, it means that the situation in her family is also at a dead end. Here you need to act quickly and carefully, without forcing others to pay attention to your mutual sympathy. Make the first meetings more friendly, and then, with mutual agreement, you can move to the next level.
Social media
If you don’t know how to find a married mistress for a married man for temporary entertainment, pay attention to dating through social networks. There are special groups where women and men are looking for lovers for a pleasant time. It’s very easy to find a person to talk to through a social network; all you have to do is show attention when communicating, interest your partner, and arrange a personal meeting.
When meeting your lover, it is very important not to reveal all your cards at once. Also, don't give away your identity, especially when living in a small town. Post personal photos only in private correspondence, so as not to run into girls you know and avoid exposure. Having found a worthy candidate, immediately delete the page on the social network and leave the group so as not to create an extra reason for gossip among your friends.
Job
You can find a married or single lover at work, and this is often what happens. Romances between a subordinate and a boss or ordinary colleagues occur most often. Regular communication, common goals, and daily meetings bring people together much more than meeting people on social networks or on special sites.
If you are a boss and have an attractive secretary, then be sure that she likes you too. It’s enough just to show more attention, invite a girl to a restaurant or spend time in the office after work. A surge of emotions between employees occurs very quickly. The only difficulty here is the possibility of exposing lovers at work. But with a strong desire, you can do everything to ensure that these meetings take place purely outside of work and without familiar eyes.
READ What to do if your lover doesn’t call or write
Preparation
The next stage of the search is preparation. What to do:
- New phone and mobile number . Under no circumstances should you bring it into the house. When returning to your wife, turn it off and leave it, for example, in the car. This will avoid unwanted calls and reduce the chance of the betrayal being discovered.
- New social networks . Create new profiles and link to another phone, otherwise your new page in the recommendations will be displayed to your wife. Remember, it is better to send personal photos in messages, and not to show them to everyone. Young ladies should not know where you live and work; out of anger and resentment, they can take revenge and tell your wife about your affair.
What to look for when choosing
When a man wants to find a lady for temporary entertainment, he often thinks about what basic qualities and characteristics should be present in the new woman. If you want to find a mistress, carefully choose her and take into account the most important nuances - age, marital status, views on open relationships, etc.
Age
Each age group is good and at the same time dangerous in its own way. If you are a wealthy man who is ready to support a young and beautiful girl with big needs, you can choose any beauty. If you are not ready to be a sugar daddy, but want to see a mature, wealthy and independent woman next to you, consider candidates after 30-35 years.
Women over 30 are less impressionable, they no longer believe in fairy tales and look at the world soberly. At this age they can have families, husbands or be divorced. Women are experienced, they know the whole essence of behavior in the family or on the side, so communication with them will not only be pleasant, but also useful for you.
It is easier to come to an agreement with older women; they rarely go to extremes after breaking up and do not blackmail with their threats. If you want to find truly complete solace and relaxation, give preference to ladies over 30 years old.
Experience in relationships
Often psychologists encounter clients who do not know how to get a young mistress for a married man. There are a lot of options for dating and starting a relationship, everyone chooses the most accessible one. But if you want to find a young lady for long-term meetings, carefully study her condition and find out about her experience in relationships.
Few people know that the best options are married or divorced women. When a girl faces a divorce, she radically rethinks her life and her behavior.
Divorced women look at relationships in a new way, they temporarily avoid serious feelings, they are ready to simply be close to a man, to feel some support. Such women can easily leave and return without any danger to the family life of their lover.
READ Why women have lovers: the main reasons
Presence and age of the child
If a girl has a small child, be prepared for the fact that she is simply looking for a wealthy father for her baby. If you do not want to leave your family or divorce your spouse, then such a relationship can only aggravate your situation. Women in love, raising small children, are ready to do anything to find a wealthy man.
The existence of personal reasons for cheating
Psychologists do not exclude the very fact of the desire to find a lover or mistress. Of course, this behavior cannot be considered the norm, but sometimes a partner chooses it as the only way to escape problems and, in some cases, even to strengthen a legal marriage.
At the same time, women often wonder where men find mistresses and why they do it at all. First of all, it is worth understanding the reasons.
There are several main reasons when a husband begins to have an affair:
- Lack of personal freedom and total control on the part of the spouse. Of course, when two people live together, it is quite difficult to allocate time exclusively for yourself, but it should be. Both husband and wife sometimes need to be alone, minding their own business exclusively. Otherwise, dissatisfaction accumulates over a long period of time, which can lead to betrayal.
- Failure to satisfy sexual needs is another reason that leads a person to another woman.
- Revenge is not the most noble, but also an existing reason for an affair.
- Character traits - there are often people, especially men, who simply cannot be with only one woman. In this case, they will always, right up to their most advanced years, look for variety on the side.
If a man has the thought “I want a mistress,” this does not mean that it needs to be immediately implemented. It is worth starting to think about why it arose and whether it is possible to somehow change the situation.
Conflicts and misunderstandings in the family - the reasons for betrayal
Who should you not have a relationship with?
Every second man can find a mistress, but not everyone knows which women they should not pay attention to, since they are not suitable for this role. Let's consider the options:
- Bosses. The relationship will end sooner or later, but along with it, your position at work comes into question.
- Women's friends There is no such thing as female friendship, so sooner or later your mistress will tell your wife about your relationship, destroying the family and future together.
- Neighbor. If a woman lives in a neighboring apartment or in the same house, such meetings may also be doomed to failure. People you know will see you together, suspecting you of a love relationship.
If you do not want to jeopardize family well-being and do not consider having a mistress something long-term or eternal, then avoid such acquaintances and connections.
Where to look
There are 2 main places where you can quickly find a young lady for a secret relationship:
- Dating websites.
Large selection of girls , convenient search criteria by age, place of residence and marital status. Use only a pseudonym and do not disclose personal information.
- Job.
Firstly, you know the marital status of the employees and their character. Moreover, the girl from work knows exactly about your wife and what status she will be in. But there is a risk of unwanted problems, since employees have access to personal information.
How to convince a woman to become your mistress
Mistresses sometimes also need attention and trust. If you don’t want to offend your passion or provoke blackmail on her part, then it’s better to immediately tell the whole truth about having a wife and children. Be prepared for the woman to ask why you need a mistress.
If you want this particular girl to become your mistress for a certain time, try to convince her that you really need her. Provide her with proper attention, take care of regular meetings, give her gifts.
Psychologist's advice
Psychologists recommend: before starting an affair, you should try to improve relationships and the atmosphere in the house.
Perhaps things are not as bad as they seem at first glance. In some cases, the wives themselves puzzle over the problem and think about where to find their husband a mistress for a short-term meeting.
Men are capable of cheating both at a young and mature age. Whether it’s worth doing or not is up to everyone’s conscience. But what you definitely shouldn’t do is upset and upset your other half, blaming her for all the troubles.
How to control relationships
The relationship between a married man and his mistress must follow certain rules. If you are hiding your feelings and connection with another woman, then familiarize her with the rules of your communication. She should not throw herself on your neck in public, use endearing words, betraying your feelings. Convince her that meetings should be limited to trips to secret establishments, a hotel or apartment on the outskirts of the city.
Any girl can put forward certain conditions to a man, be jealous of his wife, and be offended when he does not respond to messages while at home. If you don't want to complicate your life even more, learn to control your relationships.
READ A married lover fell in love with his mistress: signs of sublime feelings
Social media
Adventurers with the request “I want to find a student girl” have a very high chance of finding what they want using the power of the Internet. A 40-year-old man can benefit from social networks. It is quite possible to have a lover in contact, you just need to enter the age range and city of residence. The main thing is to attract the attention of the chosen passion.
Try to interest your chosen one.
Ditch the standard “Hello, let’s get acquainted” greeting. Try to stand out. For example, send a virtual gift. Be genuinely interested in the girl. But remember, the main condition for dating is agreement to play a secondary role. Your temporary girlfriend should know that you want an exclusively secret relationship. Chat online for a while, then start planning a personal meeting.
At what point should you break up and how to do it correctly?
There is no special rule to help you break up painlessly. Finding a lover is much easier than breaking up with her. In order for the breakup to be human and not leave a serious wound in the girl’s soul, you need to remember the main points:
- You can't break up without explaining the reason.
- If you were supporting a girl, you cannot leave, depriving her of financial support.
- In order not to traumatize the psyche of your passion, do everything so that she makes the decision to leave.
Be careful when breaking up if you don’t want to jeopardize your future family life. The desire to separate must be mutual; only in this case will it be possible to avoid unpleasant consequences.
Why does it pull to the left?
Every unfaithful spouse has personal reasons for cheating:
- The routine of family life. One of the most popular keys for walking along the “sinful path”. Years go by, personal life does not bring any changes, youthful ardor has disappeared somewhere, but you still want incredible emotions and burning passions!
- Monotony in bed. He is a lover of thrills, a supporter of BDSM and unforgettable sex, and she is a fan of calm foreplay and typical family marital duty, when before intercourse a prayer is read, the lights are turned off, and the “sacrament” is performed in the missionary position.
- Stress relief. Even when the wife is an indomitable tigress in bed, studying the Kama Sutra like a cookbook, the husband will still find a lot of reasons for his infidelity. Let's say sexual release. He needs the same lady with whom he can meet in his free time from work, family, and time. He will tell her his problems, satisfy animal needs with her, and with a calm soul and conscience will return to his family and home. And, there: my beloved wife, delicious borscht, TV with an interesting action movie. Everyone is happy and satisfied.
- Age ambitions. Oh, this “demon in the rib”! As soon as white strands appear in a man’s hair, the thought of his own inadequacy as a male, a stallion and simply a handsome man immediately creeps in. A man suddenly realizes that he will not be able to fertilize most of the women living on earth, and he becomes scared. After all, someone else will complete this mission for him! Immediately panic, fear and a desire to prove that there is still gunpowder in the flasks. Thus, a serious family man comes to the question: “How to find a mistress?” in order to prove to himself that he is worth something. Walking in the park with a business wife and a pet dachshund is wonderful, but much more pleasant is the moaning female body of a mistress on certain days of family life.
Job
Office romance is the easiest option to have a mistress. Work is the most affordable way. In addition, an affair of this kind will add excitement to the relationship. A romantic relationship can give a boring workday a pleasant, exciting feeling. True, there are disadvantages to this arrangement. Gossip between colleagues is possible.
Short-term pleasure is opposed to career growth. A third-party relationship with an employee is short-lived; after breaking up, remaining friends sometimes seems impossible. Therefore, a breakup often provokes dismissal. The opportunity to spend more time together seems attractive, but the likely negative consequences must be considered.
Other people's wives
Choosing a married woman as a mistress is the most favorable. Such a lady also does not need trouble if suddenly their relationship becomes public knowledge. She does not need to give numerous gifts, since her husband may become suspicious. She doesn’t need constant calls so that her husband doesn’t start asking unnecessary questions. The meetings are quite short, since you still need to get home on time.
A married woman is an ideal mistress, whose interests also include the preservation of a secret relationship. However, you need to be careful here too. There are women who are on the verge of divorce. They will take lovers in order to divorce their husbands and then marry them. If your mistress also begins to dream about how she will divorce her husband and marry you, then there will be no less problems than with a woman who was initially single.
