How to interest a man by correspondence: 9 ways

A languid look, meaningful sighs, fleeting touches... With such an arsenal, even the most persistent of men will lose their heads. You never know how many secrets girls have for attracting the attention of representatives of the opposite sex!

But what if you met on the Internet, and a real meeting is not coming your way very soon? How to make a pen pal fall in love with you?

Will an ordinary correspondence with a guy be able to evoke feelings in his heart that are even remotely reminiscent of love?

How and where to meet?

Social media. This is a convenient way to find a suitable person based on age, location and appearance. However, there are no guarantees whether a person is free or in search if he has not set the appropriate status.
Dating sites and apps. Such applications independently select people located nearby and who meet the specified criteria.
Thematic groups and forums. The most natural way to meet each other, guarantees similar interests and many topics to discuss.
Online trainings and online master classes. Teamwork on your personality or project brings you closer than ever. It's quite easy to find your people here.

Article on the topic: 10 best places to meet a man

Important! Don’t delay virtual communication, try to translate it into reality as quickly as possible. Then you will be able to fully assess the character and behavior of a person.

You will learn much more in this article: How to meet a guy.

Don't let him get bored

With the help of proper correspondence, you can direct your relationship in the direction you want and prevent your partner from getting bored. How it's done?

Support him, but don’t bombard him with questions about where he is, with whom and what he’s going to do.
Praise him sincerely.
Let him fight for you, don't be too available.
Always leave him the opportunity to want something more.
Spend more time with friends, but share your impressions of these meetings with your boyfriend.
Don't show your boundless sympathy for him.

How to intrigue him, lure him in

Reply to messages within 2-3 minutes. A little anticipation builds interest. Just a little wait, if you disappear for a few weeks, the guy will most likely forget about such an interlocutor.
Try to be more interested in his life than talking about yourself. All people are selfish and love to chat about their plans.
From the first messages, create an image of a positive and wealthy person; no one is attracted to whiners who see problems in everything.

#1. Avoid platitudes

Banal cliches in messages, for example, “Hello, how are you?”, cause irritation and boredom. Guys really value originality and resourcefulness.

You need to write the way you communicate in life. Then unique phrases and words will be associated with you. Don't be afraid to seem strange, the main thing is to remain within the bounds of decency.

#2. Don't even think about comparing him to other men

Comparison always has a negative effect. If you want a guy to become better, never say that there is someone better than him, especially when referring to these individuals.

Most likely, he will deliberately hate them, ignore them, be jealous of them, and definitely will not learn anything good. Suffice it to remember how your parents used your friend or sister as an example, because this provoked quarrels and lowered self-esteem. Important! Even if a man does not show how painful it is for him to hear such statements, it will leave an imprint on the relationship.

#3. Don't talk about your shortcomings

If a man chose you as his girlfriend, this indicates his sympathy. By highlighting your disadvantages, you literally force people to pay special attention to them. At every meeting, he will look appraisingly at the shortcomings and think about them. Why give yourself such a “gift”?

On the contrary, you can point out your advantages. Not plumpness, but juicy beards, not a sad look, but sparkling eyes. Then the guy will look at you with adoration.

Important! No one will love a person who does not love himself.

#4. Look for new topics

To interest each other, you will have to talk about something. Any topic is coming to an end.

To avoid awkward pauses, you can discuss:

pets;
the specifics of his work;
what kind of relationship he wants, what he expects from a girl, how he sees his family;
mysticism;
awkward but funny stories;
features of the horoscope and character of the interlocutor, of course in a comic and light form.

The more you communicate with a man, the clearer his priorities and interests will become. Then it will be possible to talk about your compatibility and more serious plans. Important! The main goal is to impress the guy, but to determine whether he is right for you. Ask what is really interesting.

It might be interesting: how to understand that a man likes you by correspondence.

#5. Don't answer dryly

Dry answers indicate disinterest and formal communication. Emotional responses, on the contrary, provoke the guy to continue the conversation, catch him, and intrigue him. Sympathy is felt even through correspondence, as well as stiffness and detachment.

#6. Call him by name

The sound of one's own name is music to a person. When you pronounce his name, you emphasize his uniqueness and significance in this world. This is why people find it so unpleasant when their name is distorted or their letter is forgotten.

During the conversation, you can ask the man whether the meaning of the name matches his character.

Important! If you didn’t catch the guy’s name, it’s better to ask again than to make a mistake or try to avoid names.

#7. Let him miss you

Any girl is pleased to know that she is missed. The feeling of melancholy when apart makes you appreciate spending time together more.

To make a guy miss you:

Don't tell all the secrets about yourself, extend the pleasure by becoming a mystery girl.
Don't forget about your friends, relatives, business. The guy must understand that you have your own busy life, then it will be even more interesting for him.
Look after yourself even when you are not with him and do not forget about your social networks. If he sees your gorgeous photos, hears friends discussing your image, this will encourage him to be even closer to such a girl.
Stop texting for at least 1 day. Then he will have time to miss you and appreciate spending time alone. The contrast is especially noticeable when you bring positive emotions into a guy's life.
If you are planning a meeting with your interlocutor, you can send a message in the spirit of “I can’t wait to meet you.” Then the guy himself will begin to anxiously wait for this moment.

#8. Add intrigue

The intrigue caused in the correspondence may be connected with you or with his personality. All people are selfish, men are no exception. To intrigue a guy, make him think about himself at your suggestion. For example:

“I realized something about you...”
“Do you know that you have a special character?”
“Did you come to my page?” If he says that it’s not him, you can answer: “But I would like it to be you.”
“Can I ask you a personal question?”

You don’t need to reveal all your cards right away, he should be intrigued. Instead of a quick answer, flirt with your interlocutor. For example, “I don’t even know, I’ll think about whether it’s worth telling you this :)” Then you need to flirtatiously describe the man’s virtues, he will be very pleased.

The intrigue associated with you may look like this:

“I’ve been smiling all day since your message/last night.”
“Today I woke up so early, I decided to watch the sunrise on the roof/in the park/on the balcony.” Extraordinary girls attract much more attention. You also emphasize your energy and interest in your own life.
“Uh, I have a problem...”, then wait for a response from him, and: “I can’t stop thinking about you.”

#9. Don't reply to a message right away

The one who responds longer than the interlocutor seems more unavailable and busy. However, we are talking about 5-10 minutes; it is tactless to respond after a few days.

Pay attention to how quickly the young man responds; if the message arrives immediately, it is enough to pause for 2-5 minutes. If he answers after a few hours, comes in once a day because of work or business, there is no need to hang on the phone. Copy your interlocutor.

Important! A person who always responds to messages immediately appears to be a phone addict. One gets the impression that you have nothing else to do, and besides, the guy will immediately guess that you are “stuck.”

#10. Don't talk only about yourself all the time

A person who talks only about himself unwittingly demonstrates:

egocentrism;
lack of attention;
desire to gain recognition;
fear of being alone, unheard.

This causes boredom and rejection for the interlocutor. A guy who communicates with a girl for the first time does not feel the need to know her mental traumas, all her interests, hobbies. We can talk about this, but in moderation. Give your interlocutor a break, let him also talk about himself. Dialogue is like a game of tennis; the ball cannot be on one side of the field.

#eleven. Communicate regularly

Regular communications show interest on both sides. This way you won’t let them forget about you, you show that you can find time to communicate with a person. At the same time, observe the guy’s behavior; if during the whole day he has not found 1-2 minutes for a short answer, he is not interested in communication.

Be a little mysterious

Even with ordinary correspondence in a chat or social network, you can remain a little mysterious and intriguing:

Don't rush to respond to his messages right away. If he writes again and wonders why you didn’t answer, then the plan worked. The main thing is to figure out why you are so busy.
Don't tell him everything. Find the golden mean between sociability and politeness and a person whose “soul is wide open.”
If he doesn’t ask you about something, then don’t rush to tell you.
Sometimes mention something that really interests you, but don't go overboard with talking only about yourself.
Call him by name in correspondence.

How can you tell if a guy is interested in you?

Frequent messages. A guy who enjoys communicating with a girl will constantly look through messages, looking for reasons to accidentally write at least something.
Quick response. If a man tries not to delay the message, then his interest in you outweighs the importance of current affairs.
High quality correspondence. It's easy to send a monosyllabic response and conduct a dry dialogue. If a man is interested, he will talk in detail about his affairs, will not forget to ask about your plans, will take an interest in your mood, events and plans, and will even try to cheer you up.
Flirting. Emoticons, kind jokes, compliments indicate his interest in you as a girl. Likes and comments. This is also a signal of interest in you.

Important! To accurately determine sympathy, you need to meet in real life. Guys can be polite on social networks, but completely stingy with emotions in reality.

How to understand that a man is interested in you: the surest signs

Read

10 best places to meet a man.

Read

How to start a conversation with the guy you like in an original way.

Read

Let's look at the reasons why guys don't get to know you.

Read

Advice for shy people

Excessive timidity is not the best companion for flirting. As practice shows, insecure girls can forever remain in the eyes of successful men just gray mice whose presence they do not even notice.

But the feeling of anxiety can be overcome:

Work on your appearance, makeup, hairstyle, wardrobe. Contact salon specialists for help.
If it is difficult for you to construct sentences correctly and beautifully, or you are simply lost and don’t know what to say, go to public speaking courses. Reading books, magazines, and browsing news sites will help you be interesting. And most importantly, listen to what the interlocutor is talking about.
Self-confidence is often an acquired character trait. It can be seen in posture, gait, gestures and manner of speaking. A few workouts at home in front of the mirror will definitely improve the situation. Analyze what you would like to learn from other people and develop these qualities in yourself.

Surely there are people next to you who, just like you, find it difficult to communicate with the opposite sex. Help them become firmer and get rid of shyness. Thus, you yourself will not notice how you have turned into a sociable and self-confident person.

What questions can and should be asked, and what not?

To understand as much as possible about a person, you can talk:

about studies, future goals for study;
about hobbies and interests;
About work;
views on future life, family, whether the guy even wants to start a serious relationship;
about family, parents, brothers and sisters, relationships within this family;
what kind of girls a man likes, what he looks for in his chosen one;
what type of vacation does a man prefer? If you like to travel and don’t sit in one place, then being a homebody won’t suit you.

However, it is better to avoid some topics, especially at the initial stage of acquaintance:

ex-partners, relationships;
sexual themes;
political and religious views;
man's income.

Erotic pictures

This category does not include selfies with duck lips or making faces in front of the mirror. These are piquant pictures that have one and only one goal: to dazzle your chosen one.

We would like to note right away: there is no need to send such photos to men you don’t know. They can be an excellent reason for blackmail. In addition, in the event of a breakup, the offended partner may make them public. You don't want to become a star on porn sites, do you?

But if you want to diversify your relationship, this method is ideal. Guys are much more easily aroused by what they see than by talking about sex.

Therefore, if you trust your partner, the game is worth the candle! An erotic selfie with a banana or in lace lingerie will blow his mind.

If possible, book a professional photo shoot. Nowadays there are many photographers who work in the nude style.

You will receive high-quality, retouched photographs and will not worry about a bad angle or too wide hips.

You can also do a themed photo shoot. For example, rent a maid or nurse costume, put on high heels and cute stockings and play a little on camera.

Sexologists conducted a survey: in the fantasies of 80% of men there is a strict teacher, a sexy nurse and a cute maid!

So, if you try on this look, you can’t go wrong, and you’ll have the effect of a bomb exploding on a man!

There is no need for blatant frankness. The lace of stockings peeking out from under a short robe leaves more room for imagination than bare buttocks.

It is also better to leave whips and whips in a sex shop. A woman should be alluring, but inaccessible. Then primitive instincts awaken in the representatives of the stronger sex: to conquer, to achieve.

Men can look at girls for whom nudity is just a job on the Internet or in a strip club.

Men's opinions

It is important for me that the girl writes correctly and is interested in communication. I do not accept any kind of manipulation. I never drag out correspondence and I don’t recommend it to girls. It’s better to meet in reality right away, it will be clear whether the person is suitable or not. Spending months on messages and then being disappointed after the first meeting is a waste of time and effort.

Maxim, 25 years old

I love light and cheerful girls. Usually they will make a joke and lighten the mood. The purpose of correspondence is to find out a person’s initial mood, to evaluate his views on life, we still don’t owe each other anything. I don’t continue communicating with those who, from the very first lines, begin to load me with their problems, blame me for not being online, complain about their complexes, or start asking about my income.

Alexander, 32 years old

If I'm interested in communication, I'll always look for a reason to drop a line or two. I am pleased to receive answers, develop dialogue, and flirt. I don’t see anything wrong with a girl writing first, especially if I like her. Interest can be easily assessed by frequent replies, long messages, guys are the same people.

Matvey, 29 years old

How to keep your interlocutor's interest in a long-distance relationship?

A guy's interest in communicating by correspondence may decrease over time. To prevent this from happening, you need to listen to the recommendations of people who have already had experience in long-distance relationships, and everything turned out well.

What do these people advise:

Relax control. You cannot express suspicions of infidelity and pester a person with questions. Especially if the reason for jealousy is long responses to SMS.
Don't forget about romance. You can send poems, sing a song on Skype or a video call, send romantic messages for no reason.
Provide support. It is important to be able to listen and encourage a person in difficult situations.
Find other activities. You can’t turn relationships into a hobby and constantly sit with your phone in your hands, waiting for an answer. You need to be able to be distracted, otherwise communication will become intrusive and quickly get boring.
Talk about intimacy. It is important to stir up a guy’s interest by sending erotic SMS and candid photos. You don't need to do this too often. 2 times a week is enough.
Make joint plans. Plan future and next meetings together.

Long-term long-distance relationships need to be diluted with meetings, albeit rare ones, if it is not possible to see each other more often.

Question answer

How to get a guy to text more often?

Often girls take the position of an offended interlocutor. They begin to ask questions like: “Why didn’t you write?”, “Where did you go?” This behavior is very off-putting. Instead of a complaint, use positive emotions: “So glad to see you!”, “How are you doing, I miss you,” etc. Then the man will be happy to log into the messenger.

How to increase interest if correspondence has become boring?

Modern communications allow you to connect photos and videos to correspondence. It’s one thing to write “Good morning!”, another to attach a photo where you smile broadly, wishing a man a good day. Short positive videos and congratulations also evoke much more emotions than text.

The man doesn’t answer, doesn’t write first, what should I do?

There could be several reasons for this. The guy perceives you as a friend, is afraid of seeming intrusive, or is simply not interested in communication. The latter, unfortunately, is the most likely. A frank conversation will help bring clarity.

Give flirty compliments

A compliment is a good way to flirt.
Everyone likes to hear pleasant words addressed to them. The main thing is to give compliments sincerely, do not use memorized, template phrases. For example, instead of “you are beautiful,” write “you have a very expressive smile.” Attention! It has been proven that the right compliments from women encourage a man to treat a girl with even more care and tenderness. Compliment your guy directly and specifically. Do not use half-hints or flowery expressions.

Psychological techniques in correspondence

Make him feel emotions, show your interest . Guys are also attracted to girls who are not afraid to be funny and cheerful and show their true feelings.
Don’t be afraid to lift your man’s spirits by sending a simple message : “I’m very interested in you” or “Today I remembered you :).” He will be hooked and will end up thinking about you all day.
Don't let yourself be humiliated . If a man suddenly starts writing vulgarities and hints that he wants to meet for one night, playfully but confidently put him in his place. If a guy is interested, he will continue communication in a different format.
Leave room for your interlocutor to act. Write a little less, answer a little less often. Go offline sometimes. The agonizing wait will only brighten up the next communication.
Create a psychological swing. After you have disappeared from the network, be sure to surprise the man and give him positive emotions. Send him a compliment, a good morning wish, share a funny story. This way he will notice the contrast - it’s fun and good with you, but boring and lonely without you.

Keep the conversation going

Chatting with a guy is significantly different from chatting with girlfriends. To win over a man by correspondence, you need to know a few subtleties:

Talk to the point. Give your interlocutor an opportunity to speak.
Communicate with the guy easily, cheerfully, at ease. Avoid negative topics.
Do not impose your point of view on a man, be restrained and reasonable.
If you are not aware of a topic, do not rush to move the conversation in another direction. Ask the guy questions, try to find out more about it. He will be pleased.
Try to avoid long and boring stories with unnecessary details.
Do not talk about what is unpleasant to your interlocutor.

You might be interested in: how to communicate correctly on a dating site.

How to interest a male colleague?

Finding a common language with a male colleague is not so difficult; you already have something in common - work. You can send him a message asking for help, invite him for a cup of coffee, “accidentally” drop papers in front of him in the office.

Important! It is better to seduce a colleague after work. During a busy day at work there is no time for chatter, and the man will not take such a worker seriously.

To get a colleague's attention:

demonstrate your sense of humor or wit in a general conversation; positive and active girls always attract attention;
take an interest in the area in which your colleague is knowledgeable, ask him a question on social networks;
don’t forget to look stylish at work, but you still shouldn’t dress up in vulgar clothes with a huge neckline;
do not talk about your sympathy in the team, especially in correspondence with other colleagues, this can compromise both you and him;
find out about his hobbies, invite him to an exhibition, a match;
prepare delicious snacks or sweets and treat your colleagues, including him, quite possibly in the evening he will thank you in a message;
don’t miss corporate events and business trips, especially if your chosen one will be there.

What attracts men to women?

Tease

If you want to drive your interlocutor crazy, then you can try the following:

Abruptly disappear from correspondence for several hours or half a day. Most likely, he will bombard himself with messages asking where you went.
Send him messages unexpectedly.
Don't forget to compliment him.
Remember that flirting should be fun for both of you.
Don't make fun of his shortcomings and weak points.
Don't tease him all the time, don't use the same techniques.
Only flirt with him on special occasions.
Let him know that men are interested in you, that you don’t sit at home and get bored 24/7.

Conclusions on the article

Despite the stereotypes, you have every right to show interest and write first. However, if a man does not initiate a response, you will have to draw conclusions.
You need to communicate politely, competently, and not resort to offensive jokes or swear words. First, become a friend to your interlocutor.
Don't impose. Write in a similar manner as he does, respond with similar frequency, don’t bombard him with a ton of messages and don’t burden him with problems.
Don't be afraid to lift your man's spirits. Even with an acquaintance, it is quite appropriate to joke, give a compliment, and say that you remembered him. In any case, it will be pleasant and make me think about you.

Make jokes at the right time and laugh at his jokes

Of course, you shouldn’t deliberately “squeeze” jokes out of yourself, but it wouldn’t hurt to show yourself as a cheerful person.
Guys, for the most part, like girls with a sense of humor. Don’t be afraid to tease your interlocutor a little, or insert witty humor into your messages. Try not to make your dialogue boring and monotonous. Add emoticons to your correspondence to show that you are really funny.

Horoscope - attract a guy's attention by recognizing his zodiac sign

Show Aries your confidence, and he is unlikely to let you go for long. This sign likes persistent and decisive women.
Friendship and trust are important to Taurus Become part of his inner circle.
Geminis want to see proactive girls nearby. Feel free to take a step forward.
If you invite a cancer to watch a movie on its territory, it will happily accept the offer. Men of this sign do not like noisy companies.
Leos prefer women - leaders who will love and support all his hobbies. However, he will not tolerate a woman who is trying to show that she is better than him in many ways.
Virgos like girls who are fashionable, neat, and organized. Stylish details and elegant accessories will help to attract the attention of such a man.
Libra be approached through a love of nature. Having common interests will earn you extra points.
for Scorpio to have an independent and independent young lady next to him. After all, it is precisely such women that attract Scorpio men. Act as if you don't need this person's support.
Sagittarians are very sociable. They can be captivated by a cheerful smile and witty jokes.
Capricorns love smart women. Show your intelligence, make him think and his thoughts will constantly return to your person.
Aquarius is driven primarily by curiosity. Do not reveal your cards to him, fuel his desire to learn more about you.
Pisces love the arts. Joint trips to concerts, theaters, and art museums will help you get closer.

Examples of successful phrases

You can flirt with a guy by correspondence using the following phrases:

Feminine:

“I'm not very good at dancing. It seems to me that you will be able to correct this situation.”

“I look at you and understand that real men still exist.”

“I’m very lucky to have met such an interesting guy here.”

"I'd like to know a little more about you."

Boldly:

“You are under criminal charges for stealing my heart!”

“Have a conscience, leave my thoughts at least for a while and let me work a little.”

“Hi, I decided to give you... that wonderful book to read.”

“It’s already very late, I really want intimacy... with my pillow.”

Playfully:

“Today I dressed very modestly, but for some reason everyone around me is looking at me.”

“The subscriber is tired of working and wants something sweet to grab.”

“The doctor advised me to take vitamins for a good mood. But I have my own recipe."

“It’s high time you were banned, you’re addictive.”

Extraordinary:

“Today I went fishing and caught perch and crucian carp. But only then I realized that the fish of my dreams is you!”

“I don’t know how to tell you this... I took a test and it showed that we are perfect for each other.”

“Don’t be surprised if Santa Claus kidnaps you on New Year’s Eve and takes you to me. Wishes must come true!”

“As it turns out, I know how to look for treasures. I found you and I won’t share you with anyone!”

Only comment when you have something to say

There is no point in commenting on someone's post with just an emoticon. Nobody takes such reactions seriously, considering them spam. It is much better to leave a modest comment on the matter, and for this you really should have something to say.

Of course, this doesn’t mean meaningless emotions like “You’re so cute!” or “Cool photo.” Showcase your intelligence and wit - make your comment stand out from others.

Show him he's on your mind

The guy shouldn't think that you are absolutely indifferent to him. How can you show that he is in your thoughts without being too intrusive?

Sincerely admire your interlocutor.
Be as honest as possible with the guy. Honesty is a sign of trust.
Provide him with all possible assistance in achieving his goals.
Don't make him feel unwanted, humiliated, forgotten.
Don't force a guy to spend all his free time texting you.
Ask him for advice in a difficult situation.
Be gentle in your interactions with him.

Do you want to interest a guy?