Every person has a desire to achieve their goals and satisfy their needs. Realizing and developing your own potential makes it possible to feel happiness and fulfillment in life. The path to achieving various goals requires enormous work, knowledge, patience, perseverance, experience and many other qualities and efforts. All this does not arise from scratch and all of this has a beginning , which arises in the ability to overcome both external difficulties associated with the place, time and circumstances in which a person finds himself, and with internal conflicts caused by doubts, reluctance, fear and indecision. To overcome both external and internal problems, willpower is required. Willpower is a quality that underlies the ability to persevere through difficulties and firmly pursue your goal.
Willpower - what is it?
Willpower is the ability to act based on volitional effort, rather than desire or mentality.
It is also the ability, with the help of will, to suppress negative attitudes that prevent the achievement of a goal. Negative mindsets are fear , doubt, uncertainty, anxiety, apathy , laziness and other qualities that prevent you from acting and achieving your goals.
Willpower makes it possible to act based on reason and goals set in advance. Desires and moods very often lead a person astray from the intended path, and only with an effort of will it becomes possible to suppress the desire that will interfere with achieving the goal. People face various goals, but it is willpower, throughout the entire journey, that can make it possible not only not to deviate, but also to steadfastly adhere to a predetermined route.
A person must learn to submit to himself and obey his decisions.
Marcus Tullius Cicero
The influence of mindset and desires on actions is colossal. Suffice it to remember how the reasonable goal of acquiring a positive habit of running in the morning defeats the desire to sleep, and the mentality of rest all the more prevents a person from using his will. This is how many barely begun paths end, under the influence of the desire for comfort, pleasure or reluctance to act. The lack of willpower in such cases leads to the inability to overcome the established order, whether it is in the global rhythm of life or only in sleep patterns. The important thing is that the very ability to change life for the better comes precisely from conscious volitional efforts. Whereas life always slides towards the worse on its own.
Willpower is the ability to use volitional efforts to solve problems. Willpower is necessary where we do not have successful experience of the final result, which means that for a person who is just moving towards his goal, willpower is one of the most necessary skills that will make it possible to constantly achieve and move towards the goal.
The concept of will in psychology
The structure of a volitional act has the following form:
- First, a person experiences psychological or physical discomfort - this is an incentive in relation to a subsequent action (for example, there is discomfort in the stomach);
- Then there is an understanding of my discomfort (the sensations in my stomach tell me that I am hungry) and the emergence of desire (I want to eat). But it happens that awareness does not occur.
- Then it is customary to talk about attraction : a person wants something, but does not know what exactly. He begins to look for the cause of his feelings until the attraction turns into the status of desire (he stroked his rumbling stomach - it didn’t help, he sang a song to him - there was no result, he saw an appetizing chicken on TV - the sensations intensified and the realization of hunger came);
- Desire gives rise to purpose (I need food);
- Making a decision to take action (go to the supermarket for groceries). If at this stage a person has two or more desires, then a collision occurs between them. In psychology, this phenomenon is called the struggle of motives (I want to eat, but I don’t want to go outside because of the heavy rain);
- And here an act of will - the choice of one of the motives (I decide to take an umbrella and go);
- This is followed by internal planning (which store I will go to, what I will buy) and external execution of the plan (I get dressed and leave the apartment).
How does lack of will and willpower manifest itself?
Willpower is the ability to consciously use will in solving problems associated with reluctance or lack of motivation to do something purposefully. The manifestation of willpower, elevated to a habit or quality, is discipline. Will itself is the ability to make decisions based on reason, the expediency of certain actions, and not on the basis of whether they will be pleasant or not. Depending on whether a person is guided by reason or intelligence, his actions will show a tendency to act in a certain way. The mind will incline towards pleasant actions, and the mind towards expedient ones. That is, those goals that bring you closer to your goal and contribute to the development and improvement of life through work and encounters with unpleasant events.
Pleasant activities, such as entertainment or relaxation, will improve a person’s life at the moment, but, more often than not, lead to further degradation. This is due not only to the fact that the attractive process of entertainment turns a person away from work and also takes away many potential opportunities, but also to the fact that entertainment creates a way of life in which the use of will to achieve goals is simply not necessary. When faced with real problems, such a person will be more inclined to give up activities due to both the awareness of the need for work and after the first difficulties.
An ordinary person, in this case, is more inclined to show willpower, realizing that his failure is not so much a manifestation of the inability to achieve the desired result, but rather an indication of a lack of experience or an incorrect approach to solving a problem. All other things being equal, the chances of achieving success in any field are greater for those who try again and again, trying to approach problems from different angles, changing their behavior and improving in their activities, than for those who gave up after the first failure or didn't start at all.
Yes, you are imperfect. So what? Stop considering every mistake you make as a valid reason for admitting complete failure.
Robin Hobb
Volitional efforts are necessary not only in activity, but also in self-control, discipline, patience, perseverance and many other qualities. In relationships, volitional efforts help not to experience negative emotions. Precisely not to experience, since the mind most often strives to inflate as much as possible various manifestations of anger, envy, anxiety, resentment, etc. Also, in relationships, volitional efforts are necessary both to demonstrate positive qualities such as generosity, patience, understanding, etc., but also to preserve the relationship in difficult times, which, no doubt, were present in most relationships.
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Willpower is one of the main keys to the ability to develop and change your character, leveling out negative qualities in yourself and cultivating positive ones. The fight against desires, attachments, imposed ideas, shame, guilt, resentment and other obstacles on the path to a happy and free life is a matter of the ability to show your will to work on yourself. It is not always easy to admit a flaw in yourself, but it is even more difficult to eradicate it, and it is this work that most requires the manifestation of willpower.
Lack of will, as the opposite of willpower, manifests itself in refusal to activity based on mood and unwillingness to overcome anything. Lack of will is the lack of ability to exercise will, that is, the inability to act based on understanding and the decision made. This manifests itself in both impulsive and depressed behavior. That is, either the inability to act purposefully due to being busy with nonsense, or the inability to act due to general depression: uncertainty, doubt, apathy. Lack of will does not provide the opportunity to change life, but only provides the opportunity to swim with the flow of the mind and moods, desires and fears, which, without a doubt, only aggravate a person’s situation.
Additional methods
- Meditation . One of the most ancient and effective methods. During meditation practice, a person is able to concentrate on the main thing and focus his attention. Even within three days, supplemented by 10-minute meditations, a person becomes more attentive to others and less susceptible to stress. His level of self-control increases, which leads to the formation of stable willpower. To get started, you can use the simple exercises that are on our website.
- Cost accounting . It is useful to have a notebook in which to write down your daily expenses. This will help not only reduce expenses, but also gradually develop willpower. Accounting control increases attentiveness and counteracts temptations: to spend money on alcohol, cigarettes, and sweets.
- Control over your speech . It is important to take some time and analyze your daily speech. Does it contain a lot of obscene expressions and filler words? It's better to get rid of them. You can control yourself by recording your conversation on the phone or with friends. Or ask loved ones to remind you of the problem. In the beginning, you need to devote at least one hour to this skill. Gradually increase the time. Increasing self-control helps improve overall results.
- Exercise stress . Sports are not available to everyone due to health reasons, but you can choose the appropriate type of physical activity. To do this, you don’t need to go to the gym or go for long runs. It is enough to devote at least 1-2 minutes a day to the Plank pose or hang on the horizontal bar for 10-15 minutes. For those interested, it is recommended to take a yoga course. Physical activity improves health and helps develop persistence in achieving your goals.
- To fulfill promises . This is a difficult but very necessary skill. Instead of words-instructions “I need to do this and that,” it is better to use the wording “I promise myself to do ...” and follow this promise strictly! Otherwise, there is a great temptation to lie on the couch all day without getting anything done.
Qualities of willpower
The qualities of willpower are both those qualities that come from willpower and those qualities from which willpower comes.
Qualities from which willpower comes:
- reasonableness
- consciousness
- zeal
- durability
- determination
- hardness
- fearlessness
Reasonableness is the ability to set the right goals and understand how to achieve them. Consciousness is the acceptance and awareness of full responsibility for one’s life and actions. Diligence is the ability to both perform work and derive satisfaction from it. Resilience is the ability to remain oneself, in the same state, both in joy and in sorrow. Determination is the ability to suppress doubts and achieve a goal with stability and energy. Firmness is the unswerving adherence to one’s path and the ability to maintain one’s principles and qualities over time and in different circumstances. Fearlessness is the absence of fear, worry and doubt.
If there is no opportunity to exercise willpower, then the development of these individual qualities will give impetus to the manifestation of will and its application.
Qualities that come from willpower:
- constancy
- discipline
- control of feelings and emotions
- determination
- asceticism
- calmness
- self-control
- forgiveness
- strength of mind
Constancy is the ability to stick to the chosen path without deviating from it under various pretexts. Discipline is the ability to follow the rules and norms established for oneself. Control of feelings and emotions is the ability to control the manifestation, origin and growth of certain emotions, as well as level them. Determination is a conscious commitment to a goal and following the path to it. Asceticism is the ability to endure various physical and psychological deprivations. Calmness is independence in a stable state of mind from external circumstances. Self-control is the ability to manage emotions and maintain the necessary state of mind. Forgiveness is the absence of resentment towards life, the world and other people, the ability to forgive everyone. Strength of spirit is insusceptibility to despondency, apathy, doubt, fear and other decadent moods. The ability to act sensibly and not break down in a desperate situation.
Why is all this needed?
The development of a person’s will necessarily forces him to pay attention to certain energy-consuming conditions. Having discovered the emergence of self-pity due to deprivation or fatigue, it is easy to notice how much time and effort is spent on this feeling. By replacing it with satisfaction from fulfilling a decision, a person increases self-esteem.
Trying to avoid unpleasant actions, it is impossible to solve the problem. In some cases, it can get worse (for example, a bad tooth). But cultivating the will, as a victory over one’s own fears, allows one to carry out these actions without much strain, solve the existing problem and enjoy the result.
Often a feeling of pride and personal exclusivity interferes with open communication. Developed fortitude, which makes it possible to adequately evaluate others, allows you to adequately relate to both their strength and their weaknesses. As a result, a strong personality gains the ability to constantly remain in a calm and confident state, without blaming others for their own failures and miscalculations. But these are precisely the traits that are characteristic of a successful individual who knows how to achieve success.
Development of willpower. Strengthening willpower.
Developing and strengthening willpower is very similar to developing and strengthening any skill. Since the main instrument of willpower is the will itself, the development of willpower lies in its constant use. But, if in everyday life the use of willpower is quite difficult, given its absence, then you should begin to use willpower on an educational scale.
The classic method of developing willpower is to perform an action that requires volitional effort. The greater the volitional effort, the more willpower will develop. Getting up in the morning, running, physical exercise, meditation , journaling, developing new habits and useful qualities, conscious behavior and communication , reading books - all this requires the use of willpower.
A separate exercise is to develop willpower through a specific action that is not labor-intensive. If it’s hard to wake up in the morning and run and you don’t have the strength, and you simply don’t have enough attention to keep a diary or conscious behavior, then you should perform a certain daily ritual that will not cause stress, but will contribute to the development of will. For example, rearrange one thing from one place to another a certain number of times, or simply sit in silence for 5-10 minutes without doing anything. It is very important to realize that in these cases the will will turn on and it will gradually develop as a skill.
If this method seems too easy or you want something faster, then you should use direct asceticism to develop will:
- fast
- vow of silence, abstinence
- struggle with one’s own shortcomings and their manifestations
- temporary renunciation of comforts and sources of pleasure.
The power of asceticism lies in the strong development of willpower and that is why, after completed asceticism, a feeling of omnipotence arises in a person, based on the ability to use the will to the maximum.
However, you should distribute your efforts wisely in order to develop willpower in the long term. You should start with simple exercises, and if after 3-5 weeks everything goes flawlessly, you can switch to more complex exercises, and subsequently to austerities.
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That is, ideally, you should start with a simple ritual that will allow you to simply use your willpower without unnecessary physical or mental stress. Then, in case of continued success, begin to apply willpower in everyday life, that is: getting up earlier, reading books, doing physical exercise, and so on. Having achieved success in this too, you can perform austerities. And after asceticism, willpower will be so strong that it can be freely developed.
Willpower also develops from actions that are difficult for you due to certain mental patterns, such as guilt, shame, uncertainty, doubt, etc. That is, willpower develops at the moment of overcoming those difficulties that did not give you the opportunity to achieve what you wanted and change your life for the better. Overcoming yourself requires a strong will and the result is not as important as the attempt itself to change something. It is more likely that in the area where you do not act, such as communication, you will fail. But it is through failure and the learning process that the communication skill that will bring success will be developed.
How to use willpower?
Willpower opens up new and new boundaries for a person, making it possible to act freely where others give up. On the one hand, in some cases it is enough to use willpower just a few times in order to advance in a certain area. It's basically about starting something. If it’s hard for you to develop a habit or start communicating, then by using willpower several times it will become easier and more natural each time. Doing something for the first time can be scary, but getting rid of fear lies in overcoming the fear rather than waiting for the right moment. Therefore, in such cases, willpower must be applied with great force several times, so that it makes it possible to develop a habit or do something for the first time.
On the other hand, willpower on a global scale must, simply must, be applied constantly. This applies mainly to life goals. On the way to one's main goals, sometimes falls and failures occur, and it is with the help of willpower that a person is able to get up and continue the path. This is the meaning of willpower, to constantly get up and continue to act. It is unlikely to meet a person who has achieved his goal without ever falling. Only those who have never walked have never fallen, and it is not the fall itself that is considered a failure, but the refusal to get up and continue on their way.
If you fall seven times, get up eight.
Kano Jigoro
In this sense, willpower must be relentlessly applied in order to overcome many obstacles. This is a question of success in life, a question of whether you can honestly the question “Am I doing enough?” It is necessary to honestly fulfill your duty entrusted to you by choosing your path, to follow it decisively and firmly, even if it is incredibly difficult, even if the blows are constantly crushing. A strong tree is not one that grew in ideal conditions, but one that survived all storms and disasters and thus became strong.
Effect of neurotransmitters
It turns out that willpower is affected by the work of two neurotransmitters: one of which is dopamine, the other is serotonin. Under their power is such an emotion as pleasure, or rather its anticipation. With the coordinated work of two neurotransmitters, a person is able to control the process of regulating willpower . But if he suddenly feels unsatisfied, he will try to fill this gap by any means. It is often difficult to avoid the physiological need in this matter. Moreover, some are sure that it is impossible to train willpower. But that's not true. Of course, it is best to start from childhood, but adults, with certain skills, can cope with this task.
Willpower is the tool of the master of fate
Strength of character does not manifest itself in success, since success can be granted both by deception and luck. Strength of character is manifested in constantly following your path. In a confident and firm decision not to deviate from it, despite both the difficulties and the benefits that deviation promises. Willpower is not the absence of a fall, but a rise; it is not the achievement of the goal itself - but the path to it. This is a tool that, using it, opens up the opportunity to overcome any obstacles on the path to the goal of your whole life. And the progress on the path to one’s destiny determines whether a person lived a happy, fulfilled and fulfilled life or whether he lived for the sake of empty toys and small things that promised him various benefits. The truth coming from the heart should indicate the path, and the question of overcoming it is the possibility or impossibility of using willpower for its intended purpose.
Willpower is the ability to act based on purposefulness of action and compliance with reasonable behavior, and not desires, mood or inability to act due to far-fetched reasons. Willpower is the degree of overcoming oneself, overcoming the boundaries of one’s consciousness and expanding one’s capabilities, which bring a person closer to both his most important goal and true happiness. Developing willpower is a matter of actual work and effort that must be applied over a sufficiently long period of time. But the freedom that is born from willpower is worth any effort and labor invested in its origin in one’s own heart. Happiness in exchange for work is a fair trade. Good luck.
Marshmallow delayed gratification test
Half a century ago, US psychologist Walter Mischel conducted a series of studies on the so-called “delayed gratification”. In interesting experiments, children were given a tempting treat (usually a marshmallow) and asked not to touch it for some time, promising twice as much in return. As the author himself argued, those who were able to resist subsequently achieved greater success in life, compared to those who chose to taste sweets. A year ago, the results obtained during the experiment were refuted by a number of prominent scientists.
Nevertheless, the research caused a wide resonance, forcing the public to take a different look at raising the younger generation. Any parent can easily repeat this with their child. And don’t be upset if your child couldn’t resist the temptation. There is no need to jump to conclusions that he lacks willpower. On the contrary, it is necessary to teach the child to control his desires, only then will he be able to become a full-fledged master of his own life.
One interesting conclusion obtained by psychologists who studied the theory of W. Michel states: “Do not waste your time on unnecessary research into anything negative (in general, something that distracts and seduces you). Try to switch your attention to something else—necessary, useful.”
