Hello! My name is Igor Lapin, I am a professional pickup trainer. And today we’ll talk about how to properly ignore a girl, and why this is even necessary. And first, about what ignoring is. This is really a pick-up technique that is often used in the game of the “closer-further” technique, when you need to lure your partner with something, and then ignore it in order to increase your price. I have separate articles about this, which you may have already read. But in reality this is a completely different kind of ignoring.
What is ignore
Ignoring comes in several forms:
- lack of response to messages on social networks;
- ignore calls;
- avoidance during personal meetings on the street or in other public places.
It is extremely unpleasant to realize that a person does not want to continue communication and is doing everything to avoid contact, even though previously it was possible to spend time together and receive exciting emotions. Unfortunately, not all stories have a happy ending, because life is far from a fairy tale.
READ How to bewitch a girl: powerful spells, rules, instructions
Before you cut ties, it's best to consider whether it's worth it. Perhaps it’s not too late to fix everything, find a compromise and at least occasionally maintain communication.
Puppeteers, trainers, healers, outgoing characters
CONTENT:
Ignore works, tested. Everyone will remember their experience as a puppeteer or puppet. Failed or successful. Voluntarily or unwittingly, people resort to an effective technique. They often get dubious results. Who and why blacklists partners or demonstrates indifference?
Manipulators
Fans of manipulation use ignoring consciously as a working scheme. The “closer - further” method is a favorite among pick-up artists and trainers. The internet is full of articles and videos from slipper experts. The recipes for how to prepare a victim are approximately the same: surround with heat for 3-5 days, bring it closer, then move away, pour over it with cold. And repeat - once, twice.
Why are experimental subjects subjected to simple manipulations? A normal person does not suspect others of special games. Therefore, he is honestly looking for the cause of the cooling. He is confused, puzzled. Even the caught “star of the area” begins to think about the reaction of a person to whom he would not have paid attention before. This is how the puppeteer achieves his goal.
The change of plus and minus in a relationship forms attachment. When an insecure person falls into the trap, he is rocked on an emotional swing to the point of nervous exhaustion. The manipulator’s task is simple: raise the temperature of feelings, then bring it down to minus, repeat many times. Create dependent relationships.
For what? The puppeteer is eager for power. Realizes his complexes. Subconsciously, he does not believe that they will communicate with him in a normal situation, without manipulation. He works through his traumas, for him communication and emotional abuse are connected.
What if the “doll” has the strength to break the strings and end the contact? Not all manipulators are safe. A sadist who is ignored often moves from emotional to physical violence. Or he tries to restore “access to the body” by any means from blackmail to siege.
Infants
Infantile individuals do not know how to build healthy relationships. Two infantiles in a couple are a problem for relatives and neighbors. Causing jealousy, quarreling noisily, and involving strangers in the conflict is the norm for lovers who do not want to grow up.
Ignoring, as a primitive tool accessible to everyone, is held in special esteem by infantiles. At the slightest reason and without reason, they blacklist each other and perform disappearing tricks. Then they hunt for the “ex” on social networks and lie in wait at the house.
An adult who is in love with a mentally immature person (and an old woman can be a mess!) experiences the “hot and cold” technique all the time. Every time it seems to the infant that attention to his person has weakened, the spirit of ignorance is summoned and falls upon the partner. Entertainment-retribution is practiced in cases of boredom, dissatisfaction, or simply a change in mood. How long will such an alliance last?
Trainers
The classic method of ignoring helps to achieve what you want in a love relationship. Extortion becomes a habit if the partner gives in. The story of training continues as long as the donor has the necessary resource. Material, emotional. When the resource is depleted, the white gentleman or lady looks for a new donor.
It happens that both are satisfied with the situation, then manipulative games become a ritual. From the outside it looks like the couple is prone to sadomasochism.
It’s a different story when a trainer violates personal boundaries and pushes them beyond what is permissible without the consent of the partner. Uses ignoring as a tool. At the beginning of a relationship, it is possible to squeeze out the excess. When the hormonal storm calms down, the invader loses control over acquisitions. His victim's defense mechanism turns on. She sabotages the teams and the trainer.
On the other hand, when probing personal boundaries, it becomes clear how much the couple’s attitudes coincide or disagree. Does she have a future together?
Fish people
Fish tactics are used, in addition to manipulators, by completely healthy people for the benefit of the family. They were taught this way in their parents' family. The man is silent, like a fish. He doesn’t explain what’s going on and doesn’t make contacts. If communication cannot be avoided, he gives monosyllabic answers.
What does this kind of boycott look like? Most experienced being ignored “like fish” in childhood. Many mothers were punished for their misdeeds with silence. For children this was worse than spanking and scolding.
Therefore, with a silent boycott, an adult immediately feels guilty. He himself must figure out where he went wrong and what to fix. Lesson learned, deserved forgiveness? Then the execution ends.
This is not a fatal form of ignoring. Often practiced by spouses to correct behavior. An ancient way to transparently hint at what is acceptable in marriage, how one should not behave with guests, relatives, and what responsibilities one has in the family. In new relationships, this method is rarely used - at the start of dating, more detailed information is required about what is expected from the partner. In addition, it restrains the fear of scaring away.
Doctors
Emotional blockade can be therapeutic. Any person is capable of epically ruining the atmosphere in a relationship. And in some cases, temporarily moving beyond the horizon saves you from losing your loved one. “I need to be alone” - this explanation is usually accepted. It is important to make it clear that you want to reset and come back. This is not a “pure-blooded” ignore, rather a time-out.
During the time spent in quarantine, memories will fade, wounds will heal, sins will be archived. In this option there is no neglect or inducing panic - the relationship is put on pause after a warning and clarification. How to prevent yourself from being exposed until your wounds heal? Just remember that the quality of the result depends on exposure.
Is it worth using “closer - further” for the family, for the home - to shake off the dust from love? Heal family relationships through the practice of pick-up artists? Without consulting a professional psychologist and a sense of humor, your partner is fraught with danger. Close people feel each other more than they themselves realize. Who would like to be manipulated? It’s good if attempts to juggle emotions seem funny to your husband/wife.
What is the main danger of experiments with a sharp departure into the sunset? Being alone after the usual existence of two is stressful. At first, the fugitive's attention is guaranteed. But no one canceled adaptations. And what advantages of not having a partner will suddenly appear? “Lying low” is a risky medicine; one time it will help, another time it will be fatal.
After a quarrel
People begin to ignore a girl or guy in cases where a scandal has occurred and the relationship has collapsed forever. If your significant other has done terrible things, you should try to understand and put yourself in the place of the guilty person. Even if it is impossible to maintain at least some kind of relationship after something like this, you should not harbor anger and resentment until the end of your days, because this will not lead to anything good. Everything comes back like a boomerang, you need to be able to forgive and then they will be able to forgive you too. After the breakup
The breakdown of relationships occurs not only due to infidelity and numerous quarrels. Sometimes relationships begin spontaneously and quickly, which can, after a short period of time, lead to the question of how to start ignoring a girl. To make a person fall in love with you, you can resort to different methods, all methods are good, but you need to break up carefully. It’s better to do this delicately and not spoil your opinion of yourself even more.
READ How to properly manipulate a woman: choosing a method and main mistakes
In principle, the path of ignoring in this matter cannot be correct. It is much better to simply talk to the person and try to explain to him that a mistake was made. In order not to aggravate the situation, it is better to break up immediately before it goes too far.
Of course, you need to forgive, but there are situations when the line is crossed and you need to immediately burn all bridges. People can cross all acceptable boundaries and take advantage of those who love them, even if a person is ready to do everything for his chosen one free of charge. The hardest thing for guys is trying to figure out how to ignore the girl they love. For most of them, a friend is a loved one, for whose sake they are ready to go to any lengths.
However, when that very line has already been crossed, you need to act. You shouldn’t delay everything until marriage and children, because then breaking off the relationship will be even more difficult and painful. Not only the spouses will suffer, but also the child, whose psyche is already very vulnerable. Such a blow can forever leave a bleeding wound in the baby’s heart.
Recommendations from psychologists
Experts indicate the effectiveness of the psychological technique of ignoring only in healthy relationships, where any deviations from the norm cause bewilderment of the partner. In order to determine the advisability of using ignore, answer the following questions:
- How attached is the girl to me to ask for forgiveness?
- Am I ready to end the relationship in case of reciprocal detachment?
- Is her mistake really worth ignoring? Perhaps this is a lack of attention from others? What do I want to get at the end? What should a girl do to prevent the situation from repeating itself?
The method of manipulation is not an indicator of a trusting relationship. Before ignoring, try to establish contact with the girl, let her talk, after which you need to clearly express your dissatisfaction and propose a plan of action.
If a girl has done something too serious, then you should not forgive immediately, allowing her to realize her guilt. When you quickly forgive without ignoring, the lady will not draw conclusions.
If a girl ignores a man, then only he himself can determine whether he is worth pursuing her. Manipulation is a common behavior tactic for many women.
To understand how to correctly and clearly ignore your girlfriend, you need to determine the goal, methods and boundaries. Ignoring will help you get what you want if you approach it responsibly.
How to properly ignore a girl
Under any circumstances, there is no need to offend a person and try to tell him the most offensive words that you can think of. It’s better to do everything loyally and delicately. If a guy thinks about how to properly ignore a girl, then he is most likely a good person who does not want to hurt others. This is especially true if he decided to make a girl fall in love with him when she was in a relationship. This is an ugly act, and it will be difficult for your ex-other half after the breakup. You need to understand this. Simply by putting yourself in her shoes, you can understand what words are best to say and what should not be said.
Methods and features of displaying ignorance
There are different ways to ignore the girl you like, depending on the goal that the guy sets for himself. Ignoring is a harsh technique; it has a sobering effect on your partner. The man’s non-standard behavior makes you wonder what has changed in the relationship, why he doesn’t call, and where he’s gone. Detachment manifests itself in various ways: leaving or the prospect of leaving, hanging up, calls and SMS without answer, playing the silent game.
READ
How to get your girlfriend back and improve your relationship
How to protect yourself from an abuser
There are situations when a girl herself will not write again, but demands royal treatment. She can use a person who loves her and at the same time feel comfortable, without succumbing to remorse, which, apparently, does not exist. A woman who behaves this way should not be ignored, but driven as far as possible. In this scenario, you need to express everything to her face or exclude what she, in the guy’s opinion, is keeping him with her for. When his guesses are correct, she herself will not write again. If he was wrong, then the relationship will be saved and a terrible mistake will be prevented. How to stand up for yourself
Sometimes everything reaches the point of absurdity, a representative of the fair sex behaves so horribly that the guy even likes to ignore her, because now there is no person in his life who regularly gives him reasons to become depressed.
Girls are different, you shouldn’t equate them all with nice ladies leading a righteous lifestyle. Some young ladies cause so much pain that after such “happiness” a person does not really want to live.
In order not to bring the situation to absurd conclusions, it is better to stand up for yourself in time and break off the relationship. You shouldn’t do this by causing scandals and hysterics, you need to talk calmly, explain the reasons why such a decision was made, and part ways with the world. After this, the guy will unconsciously wonder whether it is worth pursuing such a girl or whether it is better to find a better candidate.
READ How to attract the attention of the girl you like
How not to go too far
Before you ignore the girl you love, make sure you get what you want. To do this, all the conditions for ignoring must be met: communication between partners, reality and timeliness of requirements.
There is a high probability that the man may get carried away with the distance, and the girl will cool down, so you need to control the lady’s attempts to renew communication so that she does not stop making them. As soon as you notice that her persecution has decreased, stop ignoring her and return to play the game according to your own rules.
When a man ignores a girl with whom he has a close relationship, it is important not to cross the line so that the actions do not escalate into sadism.
Tips and warnings
You shouldn’t cut your teeth; it’s better to approach the problem carefully. There is no need to say that the person with whom you had to share a bed for a long time ruined your life and brought only troubles and disappointments. Your partner is a voluntary choice; your future soul mate does not hit on the first person you meet on the street and does not beg him to go on a date with her.
Whatever happens, it is better to forgive. The ability to forgive is the main human skill. Revenge is the worst thing you can resort to. After a breakup, you don’t need to go back to work or completely abandon your personal life; you should try to come to your senses and continue to develop, move along your own path. To achieve material goals, a person is capable of resorting to vile and base actions, including breaking off relationships. If it occurs to you to take this path, then it is important to remember that even all the money in the world cannot replace heaven.
Totally ignoring the girl. What is it for?
The most popular and effective scenario used during a breakup is ignoring. This tool is designed to bring your ex-lover into the disordered emotional spectrum. Total ignore
, aimed at
a girl
, makes her experience a stream of various feelings, which leads to despair.
He evokes in her either jealousy, guilt, or heavy nostalgia. Ultimately, all this is aimed at getting the girl
to return.
How does it work?
There comes a moment when a girl begins to involuntarily remember her former partner. Moreover, these memories have a positive connotation, because the majority of people tend to idealize the past. Our memory tends to forget negative moments.
The girl begins to doubt whether she acted correctly in this or that situation? She records all thoughts about her former lover, for this reason her existence becomes unbearable. The girl associates her unhappy state with the breakup; fearing loneliness, she will try to regain stability.
When should you stop completely ignoring?
If the partner who turned on total ignore is convinced that the girl has decided to finally and irrevocably return to the relationship. When she looks for a meeting in any way, she comes up with cunning options to achieve her goal.
At this stage, the importance of the partner in the girl’s eyes has increased incredibly.
Please note: How to determine a girl's character by looking at candy wrappers.
She is emotionally dependent and strongly attached to him.
What is a sanitary hour?
This is not
total ignore, but it is necessary for an abandoned person to rid his thoughts of obsessive memories of the girl. Without this condition, total ignorance cannot be organized. It takes time for moral calm and a change in values from self-destruction to further development.
Thanks to total ignoring, you can achieve a dominant role in interactions with your ex-girlfriend.
Get rid of the need for her and allow yourself to be needed. When ignoring is organized and carried out successfully, you need to learn to behave differently, taking a leading position, otherwise everything is in vain.
The power of total ignorance
Despite the fact that this tool is quite effective, it must be used very precisely. To see any effect, you need to choose the right start time to organize it. Otherwise, the situation may get out of control and thus you can only harm yourself and the situation as a whole.
To start completely ignoring
fertile soil is needed when a girl develops a feeling of nostalgia that develops into obsessions. For some cases, total ignoring is contraindicated.
How do a girl’s feelings develop when she’s ignored?
When organizing an ideal ignore, a girl goes through 3 different states:
- surprise at what is happening, the realization that she is indifferent to her former lover, this stage is accompanied by checks to see if it is true that she is ignoring;
- lack of understanding of what to do, anger, doubts about the correctness of one’s action, numbness;
- repentance, the girl is looking for ways to reconciliation.
These states do not necessarily occur one after another; they are chaotic and repeated repeatedly.
As a result, ignored
After a perfect total ignore of a girl, you get:
- dominance, which opens up the possibility of further control of the relationship;
— it becomes possible to control the girl’s behavior.
The duration of total ignore can be from 2 to 6 months, it all depends on the individual situation. The success of ignoring depends on:
— moment of start;
— layouts of the situation during separation;
— from the course of the ignore itself, the mistakes made and the actions of the partners;
- from the girl’s personality.
Read articles about male psychology in the section. Thanks for reading!
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Source of the article: Total ignore of the girl. What is it for?
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How to respond to being ignored
If a man suddenly disappears, then it is important to understand the reasons. Psychology has several tips on how to respond to a man ignoring you. Analyze your communication recently; if there have been no conflicts, then don’t panic. Men tend to “go into a cave.” They sometimes need to disconnect from communication, even with loved ones, in order to think or make an important decision. In this case, you need to give him this opportunity. You should never impose yourself, find out what the reason is and demand attention. Such behavior will only push him away and reduce your importance.
If a man ignores you, then it is important to turn on mutual ignoring. If this was manipulation on his part to make you fear loss, then he himself will take on this fear when he does not see a reaction from you. This way, your value will increase, and it is likely that he will stop playing such games. If the man ignored you because he needed privacy, then he will appreciate the fact that you gave him such an opportunity and will get in touch himself.
If the ignore lasts for 1-2 days, then it’s worth trying to find out what the reason is. If the reason is resentment, then the partner will enter into a dialogue and explain what happened. If this is manipulation, then he will ignore your attempts to build a dialogue. If the ignoring continues without explanation, then you should come to terms with the fact that you will have to say goodbye to this person. There can be two reasons - either the partner decided to end the relationship in this way, or he is a manipulator who does not know how to communicate normally and resolve conflicts. In both cases, there is no point in continuing communication.
Some people turn on ignore after a quarrel, and this is not always manipulation, they just want to avoid negativity or they need privacy. In this case, you need to give your partner a little time to cool down, but it is important to let him know that ignoring you is unpleasant. The main thing is not to impose yourself and actively ask for attention. If you show that this is unpleasant for you, then the person will understand that he is doing wrong and will contact you.