The art of not giving a damn or how to treat everything more simply

Why are some people chronically unlucky, while others shamelessly enjoy life and don’t give a damn? The answer is simple: the first, no matter how they hide it, are pessimists, and the second, don’t care. Pessimists watch football matches on TV, fight in a meaningless fight for their rights and constantly create problems out of nothing, and not only for themselves. Those who don’t give a damn play this football, know all their rights and make history. The line between healthy indifference and outright selfishness is very thin, and happy is the one who managed to feel this golden mean.

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Characteristics of a person who doesn't care

• He sleeps a lot, eats, drinks, dreams, travels, falls in love, relaxes.
• He lives for his own pleasure.
• He wakes up with a smile on his lips.
• Follows the motto: “If you can’t change the situation, change your attitude towards it.”
• He never complains because everything is always good with him.
• He magnetically attracts money, health and friends to himself, thanks to his optimism.
• The time that a pessimist spends on meaningless struggle with himself or suffering, a person who doesn’t give a damn, in love with life, spends on self-improvement.

Don't count on people

Do you want to become a non-groomer, but don’t know how to do it? Stop constantly placing your hopes on others. The less you are fascinated, the less you will be disappointed. People won't always do what you want. Sometimes they will let you down, betray you, or not keep their promises. Yes, it's offensive and painful. But don't attach much importance to such situations. Did the person fail to keep his promise? Find out the reason for his action. If you understand the person, then forgive him. If you understand that the person simply forgot about you or deliberately tried to evade his promise, say goodbye to such a person. There is no point in holding on to traitors and those who have undermined their trust. Rely only on those who truly deserve it.

How to learn to approach life more simply?

Is it possible to change your pessimistic attitude? First of all, you need to clearly distinguish banal primitive indifference from healthy. Banal indifference is free drift with the flow, selfishness and ineradicable laziness. Healthy indifference is the talent to change the direction of the flow at the right moment, breadth of soul and ease of rise.

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The first steps to healthy not giving a fuck:

1. Rest (leisure) is time that no one will get back. Life itself depends on the fulfillment of life: positive results in positive results, negative results in progressively negative results. By filling life with positive emotions and relaxation with favorite activities, we give our consciousness the right creative attitude.
2. Whining and complaining about life is taboo. Even among family.
3. “Pitiful little people”, “vile saleswoman”, “traffic cop”... We change the setting. You can see the good in every person. You just need to want it.
4. “I will never earn money for an apartment (car, microwave, ficus...).” A rolling stone gathers no moss. To get something, you need to make an effort. And with a smile on his lips and the attitude “I can handle anything.” First - the goal, then a step-by-step plan, then - confident pursuit of the goal. Even if it takes several years to get there. Do you want to become a great photographer? So, stop drooling over the works of professionals, and grab a camera and go to the courses. Dreaming of the laurels of a writer? Find your genre and learn to burn people’s hearts with your verb.
5. “Nothing depends on me anyway,” “I still can’t do it”... The eyes are afraid, but the hands are doing! Expecting failure, a person attracts it. “Order” only positive things for yourself. The attitude is “I can do it”, “I can do it”, “I can handle it”. And remember the truth - “if you peer into an abyss for a long time, the abyss begins to peer into you.”
6. Money. There are never too many of them. It’s just that one doesn’t have enough for bread, and the other doesn’t have enough for diamond caviar or a fifth yacht. Here you will have to decide. If you’re just happy with a debt-free life, then it’s time to stop complaining about the lack of money and start enjoying fishing, picnics and intimate meetings with friends over a glass of tea. If ambitions are torn from within, then you should forget about everything written above and change your lifestyle, focusing on the road leading to enrichment.

If you can change it, change it; if you can’t, don’t worry.

The art of healthy not giving a fuck is based on one simple rule: if something can be changed in a situation, then you need to make every effort to achieve your goal. Let's look at it with an example. A man is late for work and worries about his lateness. He is traveling in a minibus and it is simply beyond his power to eliminate traffic jams. Is there any point in being nervous and worried in this situation? No. You will only fray your nerves and achieve nothing. Your anxiety will not clear up traffic jams or speed up your trip. What can be done? Call work and say you'll be late. After the call, let go of the situation. Why worry about something that cannot be changed? Life without stress is much more enjoyable. You need to learn to accept the situation and act decisively. If you can't change anything, calm down and go with the flow, optimistically believing that whatever happens is for the best.

How to attract money? Don't care technique

First of all, you need to decide - how much do you actually need? Have you decided? Write down the amount in a notepad and read on.

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The presence of at least one of the listed points is your obstacle on the path to wealth:

• Self-pity.
• Habit of borrowing.
• The habit of spending more than your earnings.
• Greed, stinginess.
• Measuring any life values ​​exclusively in money.
• Ignoring the benefits of long, meticulous work in favor of immediate gains.
• Exhausting yourself with a job you hate.
• Constantly comparing your own and others' achievements.
• Complaints about life into every grateful ear.
• Exaltation of one’s own person over “second-class” people and other circles.

None of the points fit? Then feel free to decide on your occupation for the next few years, compare the amount written in your notebook with the chosen occupation and go ahead. Does not work? Re-read the points again.

Getting rid of perfectionism

Perfectionists are people who, no matter what they undertake, strive to do everything in an ideal way. Moreover, this perfectionism can also be directed at others, to whom they place excessive demands. Often, perfectionists themselves depend on the opinions of other people because they feel the need for praise and meeting other people's expectations.

This desire to achieve an ideal often takes a pathological form and can cause nervous breakdown. “There is no limit to perfection,” so a perfectionist is rarely satisfied with the result. He is not able to rejoice in the present, because he is haunted by a feeling of dissatisfaction, imperfection and an endless search for the ideal.

Living more simply means learning to accept the world as it is.

Attracting health - the philosophy of a don’t care

• The truth - laughter prolongs life is known even to children. Positive thoughts can work wonders. The scheme is simple.
• We replace the attitude “everything is bad, depression, stress, inaction, negative thinking” with “positive, constructive, decisive, result-oriented.”
• The attitude – “noodles from packets, a joke with him, with caries, and eight hours of sleep is a luxury” – is changed to “healthy eating, good sleep, timely treatment.”

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You can’t buy health – it’s not for nothing that they say so. And all great earnings are dust compared to health and its role in life. First we work to spend money on pleasure. Having earned money, we understand that these pleasures are already contraindicated for us due to health reasons. Only by really working on yourself can you achieve results.

Celebrate the journey you've taken, not the goal

How does healthy indifference work? A person must be able to accept his life as it is. It is stupid to worry about the future and worry about the past. Live for today. You need to learn to understand that purpose is good, it is a beacon in your life. But a person can always swim towards the ghostly light and never reach it. To avoid disappointment at the end of your life, you need to learn to enjoy the journey. Do what you enjoy. Don't do something for the sake of a goal. Always think about the pleasure you get. You can lose weight all your life, go on diets and never achieve the ideal body. Or you can maintain your figure not by exhausting workouts and fasting, but by morning jogging or light stretching. You will definitely see the result of physical work, maybe not as quickly as after a diet, but over time your body will acquire a beautiful texture and gradually become slimmer. After fasting, the weight returns quickly, and after gradually losing weight, the extra pounds will not return. Therefore, learn to choose activities you like and don’t think too much about the end goal.

Healthy indifference. Postulates

Not caring is not a disregard for everyone and everything. Healthy indifference is the line between indifference to negativity and absolute indifference to everything with symptoms of selfishness.

• Healthy indifference is ignoring the negative aspects in life and, at the same time, the ability to notice all the good things.
• Healthy indifference is the absence of black streaks in life. Only white ones.
• Healthy indifference is the absence of stress, depression and unnecessary worries. A person who doesn't care doesn't notice evil, doesn't get upset over trifles, and is able to see good even where there was never any.

Ten recipes for healthy indifference:

1. Banish negative thoughts . Straightaway! As soon as such a thought tries to creep into your head. Catch her on the threshold and drive her away. There are ways to do this by car and cart. The human subconscious is a soldier, unconditionally obeying categorical orders. For example, shout to her mentally - Get out! It works.
2. Don't waste your nerve cells . They don't recover. Whatever needs to happen will still happen. Whether you want it or not. And if it has already happened, then there is no point in being nervous at all, you need to either act or give up.
3. Every day, be sure and strictly devote at least an hour (or better, two) of free time to yourself and your favorite activity. Not caring about the unwashed dishes, the piles of toys in the children's room, which resembles a minefield, and the indignation of family members, friends and everyone else.
4. Learn to love yourself. Take the time to soak in a fragrant bath and clean yourself up to almost cover-quality beauty. Brew yourself a cup of coffee and drink it with your favorite cake while reading an interesting book or gossip on the Internet.
5. Learn to abstract yourself completely from everything. At least for five minutes an hour, forget about “global scale” problems and just enjoy life.
6. Learn to greet your morning with a smile , because it is known that as you greet the morning, the whole day will pass. But you don’t need much - your favorite music, a delicious breakfast, a smile at your reflection and a psychological mood.
7. Learn to control your subconscious. It is you who must give him instructions, and not vice versa. Don't put too much emphasis on anything. Moreover, as Solomon said, everything passes.
8. Forget about the illusions of an ideal life . There will always be problems in it. Bad weather, lies and betrayals, spoiled food from the store, etc. Learn to ignore these problems.
9. Don't see the world as a place of survival . Life is too short to waste it on depression and struggle. Have fun with it and treat it like a game.
10. Accept as a fact that you are busy with something other than your own business, or are going the wrong way when something is given to you at the cost of incredible sacrifices and efforts. Find yourself . Don't be afraid to experiment.

What does it mean to have “healthy indifference”

CONTENT:

People who don't give a damn are often portrayed as lazy, weak people who lie on the couch and do nothing. But this is a misconception. These people care too much about little things and are afraid of something and do not satisfy their desires. They don't “care.”

Don't give a fuck are people who:

• They look around and don’t understand why those around them act as if they are on a sinking ship.
• They attach great importance to satisfying their desires, and do not allow people around them to waste their time.
• They are selfish, but at the same time respect the rights and freedom of other people.
• They understand that the world was created not only for them. Therefore, they adapt and achieve results in ways that work, and not in ways that “would like them to work.”
• They don’t bang their heads against the wall, but constantly try new approaches to the things they want.
• They accept mistakes and shortcomings with calmness: they change the situation, if possible, or simply accept everything as it is, if nothing can be changed.

That is, people who don’t give a damn about what’s happening around them, but at the same time – which is what the prefix “healthy” means – they respect their desires and satisfy them without affecting the freedom of other people. Taking care of yourself cannot even be called selfish. Much greater selfishness is if someone else demands your time, attention and energy to satisfy their desires.

There is one interesting phrase from the TV series “Fargo” that shows the motto of people who don’t care. Two men are sitting opposite each other in a cafe, and one says to the other in the middle of the conversation:

“Your problem is that you lived your whole life as if there were rules. But they don’t exist.”

Look fear in the eyes

Intense fear prevents people from achieving success. A person can harbor ideas in his head and make plans for their implementation, but enthusiasm quickly fades - the fear of being criticized wins. You need to realize that you have two options: continue to hide in the shadows of successful people or overcome fear.

Imagine how you bring your ideas to life, what emotions you experience. Try to understand at what stage fear appears. Hear how people criticize you and notice what thoughts come into your head. Be alone with your fear until you feel it begin to recede.

Psychologist's advice

Play out the scenario you dream about. Feel the taste of victory, take a deep breath and tell yourself that there is no reason to panic. They criticize the best - become one!

Sport

There is nothing more useful than playing sports. It not only has a positive effect on a woman’s figure and well-being. Sport is also a powerful anti-stress, the effect of which extends to all corners of a person’s physiological and psycho-emotional state. By pumping up her buttocks, getting rid of excess weight, modeling herself a wasp waist with exercises, the girl not only transforms herself externally, but also splashes out all the negative energy that interferes with her life and shakes her nerves.

How to fix low self-esteem and build self-esteem

To do this, you need to answer two simple questions: “What am I?” and “What can I do?” Psychologists have found that the mantras “I am good” and “I am super” do not work. Life catches up with you, and always puts its face on the table. You can't prove to yourself that you're great if you can't do anything.

First you need to figure out “What am I?”: what do I like, what don’t like, what are my desires, dreams, needs? What do I miss in my life like air? What excites me and what makes me furious? Where is the line of my personal emotional comfort that I don’t want to cross? Having figured this out, having understood ourselves, we find support and turn into a ship with a helm.

The sails of our ship will answer the question: “What can I do?” You can’t do without goal setting techniques here. An excellent technique for setting goals can be borrowed from Pintosevich. Just soften it up a little and don't go overboard. Your goal now is not achievement, but self-esteem. To do this, you just need to choose something necessary and interesting, but not very complicated, and go for it.

Focus on achievements, not failures. Remember, failure is not a reason for despair, it is a new challenge, it is an opportunity to rise one more step higher. Gradually solving more and more new problems, you will understand that you are really worth something, and no criticism will make you angry.