If a guy doesn’t answer messages and calls, what does this mean: answer from a psychologist

In this article we will tell you:

10 reasons why a man doesn’t respond to SMS
7 tips from a psychologist on what to do if a man doesn’t respond to SMS
SMS options for a man to respond

When communicating, situations sometimes arise when a man, for no apparent reason, begins to ignore you. Perhaps this does not happen suddenly, but over a period of time. Of course, you are asking a logical question about the reasons for this behavior. Or you just become curious why a man doesn’t respond to SMS. Especially if you write to him, and he, being online, either does not read the messages at all, or reads them, but does not react to them in any way. Looks strange.

The very first thing you need to understand is that women and men have different views on communication. If the former think that the answer is a manifestation of interest, then the latter do not attach any importance to the correspondence. Understanding the psychology of representatives of the stronger sex is not as difficult as it seems. And then the reasons for their silence will become obvious to you.

What does it mean if a guy doesn't respond to messages: 5 reasons

Reading a message and sending a response takes a couple of minutes; you can find them even in the super busy schedule of a hero saving the world:

Lack of time. The banal truth. A working man does not always have the opportunity to speak or immediately respond to a letter received, especially if the message implies a lengthy, detailed answer. His thinking is of a tunnel type; at the moment when his head is busy with the task of raising indicators to the level required by his superiors, thoughts about the upcoming weekend are firmly blocked. The lover of a dedicated workaholic will have to come to terms with the fact that loving moments during work hours lose priority.
Manipulation. Gaming is no longer a woman's preserve; narcissists, abusers and other nasty types you should stay away from are deliberately creating a pendulum effect. At first there is normal communication, then the guy stops writing or answering messages, the girl gets angry, nervous, starts calling, again she is ignored or has a weak, inarticulate reaction. Then everything suddenly becomes good, it’s clear, communication improves. By allowing herself to be drawn into such a game, the lady automatically loses, taking the position of a subordinate. Gradually, cat and mouse become more interesting for the manipulator and sadder for the “victim”. Having noticed such a swing, it is right to say goodbye on the stratum, preserving your personal mental health. Loving a manipulator is the shortest path to neurosis, the murder of self-esteem.
Indifference . Lack of interest in a woman is a good reason for a man to remain silent in response. The lady is simply not the focus of attention. Perhaps a man will take the initiative (write, call) when He needs it, boredom sets in.
What exactly did you mean? Without understanding the meaning of the message, the person “freezes”, thinking about the message or response options that allow him not to look stupid, revealing a lack of ingenuity. Relevant for complex topics when you need to comprehend an answer expressing a position on a “slippery” issue.
Secret love. A man who hides his married status periodically disappears from communication. During working hours, communication occurs without a hitch, but in the evenings and on weekends it becomes problematic to quickly respond to messages; you can’t run to the toilet for half an hour at the first signal in the messenger. The wife will quickly figure out the reasons for the “diarrhea” against the backdrop of changes in the family and the behavior of the husband. The gentleman will clearly explain the delays, but by putting the value “married” instead of the X, it will become clear that these are excuses.

Raising self-esteem

For many women, as well as for men, self-esteem is career growth and business success . But do not confuse the two concepts: professional success does not mean an organized personal life.

For the female half of humanity, the growth of self-esteem largely depends on how the relationship with the man you love develops . And to do this, you should, first of all, love yourself, so that, as they say, to be, and not to seem. Otherwise, the same men will be attracted to you.

Important! Do you want something more? Don't be lazy to work on yourself. Decide on your cherished goal and tirelessly move towards it.

Does a man not call or respond to SMS? Perhaps he's just busy. Be happy! And the shining depth of your eyes will not leave anyone indifferent. This is an undeniable truth!

How to behave if a man does not answer SMS and calls

A woman, noticing the lack of response messages and calls, begins to get nervous, inventing terrible cases, trying to explain the silence. The ladies, who are prone to panic, are sure that the gentleman lost his phone, ended up in the hospital, died a brave death on the battlefield, and was urgently sent into space.

By overthinking herself, she forgets that men are savvy and purposeful when they really need it. Of course, one case in a million may indeed be an incredible coincidence of circumstances in which there is no way to contact, in the remaining 999,999 there is a backup option to send a message.

Having noticed that the second or third message remains unattended, you need to stop bombing and take a break. Before doing this, you should ask something like: “Are you okay? I’m worried” or “Please call (text) me when you are free.” That's it, the ball is in his court, we exhale and go about our business.

For especially sensitive natures, it is permissible to inquire about the life and health of the object of interest from mutual acquaintances, colleagues, and look up the time of the last visit on social networks.

What is the reason

Some people think that the answer is so easy, so why can’t it be done. But it often happens that a person opens a message and forgets to reply to it, or sees a pop-up notification and tells himself that he will respond later when he has time to think about the answer. And as a result, you always end up in the same situation, responding with “Sorry, I just saw that” or “Damn, I saw it and forgot to answer” a week later, trying not to look like a completely terrible person.

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What to do if a guy doesn't respond to messages

A young man interested in a girl will be able to find a way to warn his chosen one about the lack of communication, clearly, honestly, understandably explain the reason for the inability to answer messages, calls, and will announce the time frame for resuming communication. The worst thing a young lady can do in case of silence is to start firing machine-gun bursts of messages, expressing resentment, threatening heavenly punishments, and starting a one-sided scandal over correspondence.

You shouldn’t sit cuddling with your cell phone, waiting for news. It’s better to remember how many interesting, important things, meetings, events you can organize in your free time. This will allow you to be distracted and dispel gloomy thoughts. When a subscriber appears on the line, it is advisable to refrain from immediately expressing grievances, claims, or indignations.

His reaction and explanations can tell an attentive, self-possessed girl a lot. Perhaps the guy really experienced force majeure. Or does he not consider it necessary to comment on the action? Throws accusations onto her side, accusing the lady that she herself provoked him to go to the bottom? Time to draw conclusions.

Why doesn't he write?

STOP! Don’t rush with your meaningful “Everything is clear.” Believe me, everything is much simpler than you used to think. And not everything is as scary as you sometimes think. Here are some reasons.

He's really busy. I understand that you want an answer immediately. But the circumstances may be different - he’s stuck at work, important negotiations, or he’s solving some problems for friends or relatives. He really can’t drop everything and rush to answer you immediately after reading a simple “Hello, how are you?” It is likely that he postponed the answer to a more suitable time for him.

He is married. Yes, it’s unpleasant, but this happens if you meet and he hides his marital status. And he simply cannot answer you at this moment, because he is at home, with his wife. Therefore, try to find out on the shore whether he has someone or is free.

He ignores you. An elementary consequence of the fact that when you met, you didn’t hook him. Think about whether you need a man who is not interested in you, but writes to you and meets only when it is convenient for him or to pass the time.

He doesn't know what to answer. It happens that you girls write with some hints. But we, men, have a very specific mindset; we don’t like and don’t want to read between the lines. Therefore, it often happens that we do not know what to answer, since we cannot immediately decipher your messages. This delays the response time.

He thinks about the answer. If a man is not indifferent to you, then he will not respond “fuck off.” Sometimes, we really need to think about what and how to respond and carefully go over it in our heads. And this also takes some time.

He's playing with you. Remember, “The less we love a woman...”? There are men who do not answer for a long time in order to show that they are needed, they test your strength, and artificially tie you to themselves. And then your patience can no longer stand it, and you start calling him. And then that's it, he won. His manipulation worked.

Common mistakes women make

There are different circumstances in life. Sometimes a man stops communication without explanation. How to understand it? You can only guess why exactly you found yourself in such a situation. If you understand the motive for the action, then there is a chance to correct the situation by regaining his love.

If he tells you that the reason lies not in you, but in himself, then in most cases this is not entirely true. A man is unlikely to leave his ideal woman. After all, she completely suits him. But he is afraid of losing her and is ready to do anything to be with her. Therefore, we advise you to think about your mistakes if your chosen one suddenly disappeared from the horizon. Possible reasons:

Forcing events. Take your time, you still have time to think about the names of the guests at the wedding and plan the number of children. After the first date, you should not discuss with a man issues related to a different level of intimacy. Believe me, he is not that serious yet, and your activity can scare him.
Behavior that a man considers wrong. A man may be scared off by your ability to conduct a dialogue, using profane phrases and words, smoking or excessive gaiety fueled by alcohol. He won't want to change you. He'll just leave.
Quick sex. An excessively rapid transition to intimate relationships can cool a man’s ardor. Haste can serve you badly. The partner will decide that a wife who is ready to go to bed with the first person he meets is not suitable for him.

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“A man doesn’t want to communicate: reasons, signs and solutions to the problem” Read more

Such mistakes are considered the main ones, and at the very beginning of a relationship a girl should try to avoid them so as not to lose a man.

What to write to a man to remind him of himself: ready-made phrases

What other great phrases are there to write to a man and remind him of himself? We have prepared a list of ready-made phrases for you, choose and write to your lover. He will definitely answer!

I wish you a happy holiday (birthday)....
I've run out of gas, please help.
You talked about the fitness club you go to, give me the address, I want to take care of myself.
I'm going on vacation, can you look after my cat?
I can’t open the door to my apartment, maybe the lock is broken?
Are you good at mathematics (physics, chemistry, etc.) can you help?
We bought movie tickets with a friend, but she can’t go, do you want to go with me?
I want to choose a new phone, I’m counting on your help, otherwise I don’t understand them.
Dad's birthday is coming soon, can you tell me what to give him?
I saw your friend today and talked to him a little about you.
A friend called and asked me to come urgently, can you give me a ride?
I’m sitting in a cafe and remembering our last meeting, I can’t forget how you and I laughed at......
The girls and I decided to have a bachelorette party, can you help us carry the groceries?
I saw you yesterday, you didn’t notice me, the shirt suits you very well.
There is an important conversation, we need to meet.
My friend was dumped by her boyfriend, you said you have a good friend, let’s help her?
I can’t choose a dress, I need your male gaze.
Can you log into my computer remotely, I can’t figure out the program...
There is an offer for a party, will you come?
How was your weekend?
A friend invited me to a wedding (birthday), I don’t want to go alone, will you come with me?
How is your mother, you said she was sick?
Today scammers called and introduced themselves as a bank, I want to warn you.
I read an interesting book, I want to know your opinion, I’ll let you read it.
The movie (such and such) broke all records in cinemas, haven’t you seen it? Is it worth going?
Tell me what to do in this situation, I’m at my wit’s end, no one can give normal advice.
Give me the phone number of the car service center, you said that you always repair your car there.
I have an exam today, cheer for me!
I'm sick, can you buy me some medicine?
The neighbors say that I flood them, but everything is fine with me, can you come and have a look?
I’m on my way from the store with heavy bags, help me carry them from the bus.
I want to go on an interesting excursion, come with me, you love everything interesting.
Please advise where is the best place to get my phone repaired, otherwise it often freezes on me.
The weather is good outside, I don’t want to sit at home, let’s go for a walk?
Did you take the dogs to the playground today?

By writing such messages, you will show your best side. With a high probability, the man will answer, and, perhaps, make an appointment with you.

If you want to ask for forgiveness

There are situations when you should ask for forgiveness from someone you offended.

Example phrases:

“Don’t be angry, life is too short to waste it on grudges. I'm sorry".

“I’m very sorry that this happened. Our relationship is important to me. Right now, more than anything else, I want to make peace with you.”

“The reason for our quarrel is insignificant compared to my feelings for you. “I will try to improve and not allow such situations to happen again.”

“Let’s forget the ridiculous grievances and leave our quarrel in the past.”

“I had a lot of time to understand my mistake and admit my guilt. I'm very worried about what happened. Please forgive me".

How to start a conversation after a quarrel

All people make mistakes. If you realize that it is you who are to blame for the quarrel, then you too will have to resume communication. First, analyze the situation, realize your guilt, if any. Secondly, give yourself and your partner time to cool down.

You can make peace with a guy by correspondence using the following phrases: