How to confess your love to a girl [5 steps]: by correspondence and in real life

If a person in love cannot decide to tell the object of love to his face about his feelings, then he should turn to a letter. When your anxiety is off the charts and you realize that you won’t be able to say important words during a personal meeting, write them down. How to confess your love in correspondence and not ruin everything?

Before deciding on such an important event, you need to put aside all feelings and sensibly assess the situation: do you feel reciprocal sympathy from your interlocutor? When you can answer yes to this question, then you should move on to action. Otherwise, premature recognition will ruin all subsequent communication.

Preparation before declaring your love

Every person is afraid to open his soul and be rejected. Especially when it comes to such subtle matter as feelings. In what cases is it impossible to get a refusal? Only if the girl already has reciprocal feelings for you, then all that remains is to say things out loud that both of you understand.

To find out your chances of success, I suggest taking a three-question quick test. If you have collected three “yes” and can substantiate each one, you are ready for a declaration of love and can make full use of the advice from the article. If you have doubts, do not rush to open your heart, it can be fraught.

Are you already in a close relationship?

Confessing your love to a girl you barely know is not a good idea. And in general, I advise you not to rush into this matter: as soon as you say the “three magic words,” your relationship will reach a point of no return. After this, you will either be together, or your communication will gradually fade away. This is how human relationships work, and my experience and that of my friends once again confirms this.

Make sure that you and the girl are close to each other. If you regularly spend time together outside of school or work (at least 3 times a week), often text or call each other, communication is active both on your part and on her part - everything is fine. Otherwise, I advise you to wait and wait for the moment when everything with your sympathy for each other will be clear without words.

Does she take the initiative in communication?

Girls are different, and even if you communicate with her regularly, this is not a reason to think that everything is fine. It is important that she takes the initiative in communication herself, and not just accepts your advances and proposals.

I'll tell you honestly: every active girl has at least three boyfriends with whom she regularly communicates. And here’s how you can determine that she is considering you as a potential boyfriend:

she writes to you first;
you have a lively dialogue, she doesn’t answer in monosyllables and doesn’t disappear for a day;
you are aware of what is happening in her life, what she is interested in and what she loves;
she laughs at your jokes, smiles often, looks into your eyes;
actively accepts an offer to go for a walk/meet, etc.

Even if you received an affirmative answer to all points, it is best to rely on your gut feeling. Often we wishful thinking, and in this case only an internal worm of doubt can shed light on the true state of affairs.

Does it make you stand out from others?

The last question that will make you understand whether you should tell a girl that you love her is whether she treats you better than the guys around her. If you are united by a common team, it will be very easy to find out. The situation is a little more complicated if you communicate only on the Internet, but here everything is not hopeless.

Your main task is to evaluate whether you are winning the competition with the other guys around her. If she communicates with you with interest and more than with others, likes most of your photos, you spend most of your free time together (the criteria are given as an example) - everything goes according to plan.

Important! Answer these questions honestly—first of all, to yourself. The outcome of your confession depends on whether you objectively perceive the situation.

Advice for a 14 year old teenager

First love, the most vivid and exciting feeling, usually comes at the age of 14-16. Many teenagers are embarrassed by their feelings; they don’t know how to behave. Usually, behind this lies the fear of a new feeling, or the fear of being rejected.

To overcome fear and doubt, you need to imagine what will happen in case of refusal - you can imagine situations that are even absurd.

By clearly outlining the various scenarios, you can understand whether this is something to be afraid of, perhaps this is not a critical situation and you shouldn’t worry so much. Yes, it may be offensive and unpleasant, but life does not end there.

Sometimes teenagers hide their feelings because they do not want to impose themselves or bother a person:

In this case, it is worth understanding that the reaction of others does not depend on him, it is a purely personal choice of a person - to accept or reject.
But on the other hand, without trying, you won’t know.

You can try to confess your feelings through social networks, anonymously, or pass a note through a friend. The object of love will not feel discomfort, but rather will be pleased by someone's sympathy.

How to confess your love to a girl if she is your friend

The issue of love growing out of friendship deserves special attention. Honestly, I think this type of relationship is the most favorable. But therein lies the rub: how can you tell if she wants more?

In the case of declaring your love to a friend, the main thing you must remember is the medical principle “do no harm.” Here you need to move towards the goal gradually, without sudden movements, so that you can always roll back. And first you need to “scout the situation.”

There are only two scenarios in friendship with a girl. Either she sees you only as her friend (you're not her type - it's nice to talk to you and spend time with you, but nothing more), or your friendship is an excuse for her to spend more time with you. She actually likes you, but she doesn't want to take the initiative on her own.

And here are a few signs that your case is the first, which means that if you declare your love to a girl who was your friend, you may be rejected:

she tells you about the guys she likes and asks for advice;
she is not shy about appearing unsightly in front of you, she behaves like a “bro”;
treats you the same as others, you do not feel increased attention or special affection towards yourself.

To avoid ruining your friendship, it's best to wait and make sure she sees you as more than just a friend. And when you are sure of this, say it directly or use any of the methods described below.

TOP 10 SMS messages to your beloved woman in your own words

I can talk, think and dream about you endlessly.
I dream of being next to you, without thinking about anything. I don't want to waste a single second.
I am not a master of pompous phrases, this is what my heart says - you are a goddess.
You are a ray of sunshine that warms me every day!
I looked at the flower and then at you, because the flower is not as beautiful as you.
I will not remember quotes from the classics, I will say in my own words - you are beautiful!
Let your dreams not disturb you, but leave behind sweet languor and good memories.
May your sleep be serene and your morning be joyful!
You're cool! Let's light it up tonight?
When I look at you, I forget about everything.

How to confess your love in life: a selection of romantic ways

Give her dinner

With this method, you can choose options for any budget. A picnic in nature, a trip to a restaurant with live music, a home-cooked dinner by candlelight, or ordering her favorite dishes from a delivery service - choose what you like best. The main thing is that you arrange a date with soul and take care of all the little things - this is important to girls. You may think that these methods are trivial, but nevertheless they all work great.

Meet her at night

Night time can magically affect the environment, making it more romantic and mysterious. If you and your girlfriend like to walk in the evenings or at night, you can confess your love while lying on the grass and looking at the starry sky, climbing a tall building or roof, or going on vacation with tents outside the city. By taking care of organizing your date, you will prove to the girl that you love her, not in word, but in deed.

Write her a surprise note

To ensure that everything goes according to plan, you can express your feelings on paper. Write a note or letter to your girl telling her how important she is to you and how much you want to be with her. To make the content of the letter more romantic, you can remember the moment when you first felt love for her, or describe meetings you had that strengthened your feelings. In the age of technology, when we have already lost the habit of paper, receiving a handwritten letter is very valuable.

Option for the brave

If you don't mind being the center of attention and would like to make a declaration of love with a specific shock effect, you can do it in front of everyone. For example, in a karaoke, cafe, square, school or any other place. Ideally, have a microphone handy; in a pinch, your loud voice will do. People around you will applaud and be happy for you, and the girl will feel like a star. The most important thing: before choosing this option, make sure that you can remain confident until the very end, think through your speech well, and, most importantly, think whether the girl herself will appreciate such a wow effect.

Tell me straight

Sometimes there is no need to invent unusual methods at all - the meaning of your words will already provide the desired effect. If you feel “out of place”, it is better to abandon a creative declaration of love in favor of simple, but no less pleasant words. The main thing is to look confident, and for this you must be in a comfortable environment.

How to confess your love by correspondence

Confessing to a girl that you like her via SMS is an excellent option for those who are not ready to talk about such things in person or want to insure themselves in case of unforeseen developments in the dialogue. And here are some appropriate ways to confess your love to a girl by correspondence on VK, WhatsApp, Viber or any other resource.

Sometimes recognition is not just three words

Don’t rush to tell a girl that you love her, even if you have already decided this question for yourself a long time ago. Show your sympathy not just with words, but with actions. Be sincerely interested in her life, hobbies, problems. Support and reassure when needed. Give compliments, initiate communication, and be there more often, even when it comes to online communication. Girls always recognize such attention from a guy, so by her response you will immediately understand whether you have a chance for reciprocity.

Send her a romantic song

One of the ways to veiledly confess your love is to do it “with someone else’s hands.” In this case, with the help of a beautiful song with touching words. Send your girl a song that says exactly what you want to tell her. If you want to keep the intrigue going, you can say that you just liked her and you want the girl to appreciate her. Believe me, she will understand everything correctly.

Write a poem for her

This option is suitable for creative individuals who do not want to remain silent about their feelings. Creativity is sweet and romantic. Many girls consider this type of confession to be the most touching, and a girl who is older than you will especially appreciate it. If your crush loves poetry, consider dedicating a poem to her to make her melt.

Lifehack! If you want to make recognition for your creativity, but you don’t shine with creativity yourself, there are a bunch of special freelance sites. For a symbolic cost, you can hire a person who will write a beautiful text for you - a declaration of love, a song or a poem about it.

General recommendations

Regardless of how and where you decide to confess your feelings, remember a few rules:

Be yourself. Don't try to pretend to be someone else. You will save yours and hers time and effort if you immediately understand whether you are suitable for each other or not.
Be confident in your feelings. This is especially true for those situations where recognition was preceded by a strong friendship between a man and a woman. Or when, instead of love, a person experiences passion and attraction.
Learn to cope with stress, choose self-regulation techniques, and don’t get nervous.

What is the best way to confess your feelings: in person or on VK? Better in person. An important part of communication disappears online – non-verbal communication. It is what shows a person’s true reactions and emotions.

By the way, it’s easier to confess your feelings when you know that the sympathy is mutual. You can take your time and observe the girl’s behavior. We recommend reading our article “How to know that a girl likes you - advice from a psychologist” and observing your chosen one.

How to secretly confess your love: minimizing the likelihood of screwing up

Casually mention your future together

Making it clear that you see a girl in your future life is an important hint that she will definitely recognize and understand correctly. You can do this as a joke, in response to her remark, or discreetly, casually. When you talk about your plans, mention her often, as if she will always be there for you. This will let her know that you are serious about your communication.

Give romantic gifts

There are functional gifts, there are necessary ones, and there are gifts “for the soul.” These are cute and impractical things that will bring pleasant emotions to most girls and will say about your feelings for you:

Flowers and their derivatives: floral cards, original bouquets, hand-picked compositions, and so on;
Memorable or symbolic things for her;
Stuffed Toys;
Sweets;
Cute trinkets and trinkets;
DIY gift;
Walk or experience.

Unlike other gifts, romantic little things (especially those given for no reason) immediately hint that you have feelings for the girl.

Important! Don't think that this list is a ready-made instruction. All people are different: after all, some people may simply not like flowers and trinkets. Therefore, always start from the character and tastes of your object of sympathy.

Give her compliments

Girls recognize well when guys want to show sympathy, so in order to safely hint about your feelings, it will be enough to simply tell her something pleasant about herself. Just don’t tell her that she is “beautiful”, “pretty” or “sweetheart” - these words are pleasant, but too banal. You can praise her hairstyle, makeup, clothing style, laugh, charisma, eye color, figure, sharp mind, sense of humor, resourcefulness... The main thing is to do it sincerely and talk about what you really like about her.

Ready-made phrases for declaration of love

The Internet offers a lot of psychological advice and phrases for writing to a girl about your feelings. Among them there are many frankly inappropriate options that look too intrusive, hyperbolic or simply funny. I have chosen ten relevant and beautiful examples of declarations of love that you can take note of, adapt to yourself and send to your girl.

When I see a message from you or meet you in person, my heart always beats at an accelerated pace.
I want you to know that you occupy a special place in my life.
I would like to explain to you what love is and tell you everything that I think about you, but I cannot find the words.
You know, no matter how annoying the people around me are, having you in my life makes it much better.
Thank you for being in my life. I really appreciate this and want us to become even closer to each other.
Today you are even more beautiful than the day we met. It seems to me that you are becoming more and more beautiful every day. Or is it my attitude towards you that is changing?
You are the only one who has sunk into my soul. I feel like you and I are more than friends and that's why I would like to officially court you.
I like to watch you and discover more and more touching little things in your habits, character and manners.
You are the most charming girl I have ever met.
Since I met you, everything has changed in my life. You inspire me and I feel like the happiest person every day. I want you to give me a chance to show how much I am in love with you and how happy I would be to be with you.

Important! The best declaration of love is an unobtrusive, kind and warm explanation of your feelings in your own words. Don’t rush to dumbfound the girl, don’t dump everything that’s on your mind on her. Do it in an environmentally friendly and dignified way.

TOP 10 cute SMS messages for wife

My dear wife, I love you madly. The only consolation is the fact that our separation is temporary. And with all my thoughts I bring the moment when we meet closer.
My beloved wife! May everything go well for you.
Good morning, dear! My message has arrived to wake you up and return you from the world of dreams to earth.
My dear wife, I always need you.
Thank you for every day you live. Thanks to you, the world becomes brighter.
You are the one I live for.
Catch a kiss from me! Wake up, wash your face, have a delicious breakfast and be cheerful today and think about me more often!
You were with me at the start, when all achievements were dreams. You come with me now and help bring them to life.
My dear wife, I love you always! You are so important to me, I need you more than life!
Ready lunch, beauty, mood. All this is just you, you are my inspiration!

When is the best time to confess your feelings?

You are faced with the task of not only choosing the right words, but also choosing the right moment. Here are some win-win options for confessing your sympathy to a girl:

her birthday or any other holiday - February 14, March 8, and so on;
the day when something made her very happy - she won a competition, successfully defended her work, received a lucrative contract, or bought the thing of her dreams;
after the first kiss;
when you notice a clear manifestation of sympathy in her direction;
when you amuse or make her laugh, you feel good together;
waiting for the moment when you can no longer keep it to yourself.

For your confession to be remembered and have the desired effect, it must be associated with positive emotions and touching moments. This is why I advise choosing holidays or other pleasant events. And if you can’t wait to tell a girl that you love her, cheer her up and create a holiday yourself by organizing a date.

We give a verdict

So, if you are a fisherman, a femme fatale, or really want to become one, you cannot do without demonstrating your own strength.
Fortunately, in modern society, a girl is less and less often considered weak and reproached for taking the first step. Remember, at this moment it may be scary for both of you. Maybe it is your hidden strength and determination that will become the key to a long, strong relationship. The main thing is to evaluate the correctness of your decision. Avoid haste and actions taken under the influence of a not entirely clear mind. Don't let your emotions overwhelm you. They can prevent you from acting smoothly and gradually. And a sudden impulse will most likely destroy everything that has not yet been built.

In any case, you should stock up on a considerable amount of luck, enlist the support of friends and, even if you refuse, do not despair. What do you think?

Pondyakova Elena · 24 Sep, 2019

When you shouldn't confess your love

Despite the fact that these words are difficult to spoil, there are a couple of circumstances under which it is better not to say them:

Correspondence. If you have never confessed your love to a girl before, messengers are not the best place for your first romantic words. I understand that this method seems more “safe,” but it’s still better to choose at least a conversation on the phone so that the confession is remembered.
In the midst of a quarrel. If you are both emotional and negative, shouting out your cherished confession in a fit of anger is a bad idea. Unfortunately, this only looks impressive in the movies. In reality, you risk ruining the moment of the first declaration of love and forever linking it with a negative moment.
In the process of manipulation. For example, persuading a girl to do something she doesn’t want, appealing to the fact that you love her. Manipulation is basically bad. Manipulating feelings - you can't imagine anything worse.

Another thing that can ruin a confession of feelings is haste. If you and a girl are developing a relationship and you enjoy each other's company, it is better to let the feelings develop on their own, without using an accelerator in the form of recognition. Say the cherished words out loud already when everything is clear without them. This is especially true for girls united with you in one team: classmates, colleagues, classmates, and so on.

Infatuation and love

Love and infatuation are seemingly the same concepts and feelings; they may start the same but end differently.

Love can live for years, while falling in love either quickly passes or flows into true love.

How to distinguish between these two beautiful states?

Love:

It always arises spontaneously, it is so bright and captivating that a person’s perception of reality seems to change.
The attachment to the object of desire can be so strong that the rest of life fades into the background.
Falling in love is often accompanied by a strong physiological attraction, passion, desire to possess a person at any cost; Every day without the object of love becomes a burden.
Falling in love can push a person to make drastic changes and can sow strong doubts about himself and his appearance; can push you to take rash actions just to attract the attention of a potential soul mate.

True love can be called the highest manifestation of feelings, but not everyone can achieve it.

With true love, a person is perceived as a whole, with his entire inner world, his merits and demerits; I don’t want to change him, he is loved completely.

Love can develop over the years, only becoming stronger and stronger. Separation from a loved one is very difficult, but with such love, distance can only intensify feelings. Love makes you strong, able to overcome any adversity: “Together forever, in joy and in sorrow.”

Loving people help each other to develop themselves and become better; they easily make concessions and find compromises. Love is mutual respect and complete understanding. There is no self-interest in it, it is perfect.

Attention! Love and infatuation are united by sympathy, passion, intimacy, inspiration. But love has a more spiritual basis than a physical one.

What is the difference between love and infatuation is explained in the video:

Be ready to accept rejection

I don’t want to end on a sad note, but there’s no way without such a warning: you must be prepared for the fact that she may refuse you. In this case, do not forget that failure is only part of the path to success, and not its end. This does not mean that you will never have a relationship - perhaps she is not ready to agree to it now or responded impulsively without thinking. Give her time and treat any outcome of events easily and naturally.

And if you still haven’t decided to confess your love to a woman or girl, let this article be the sign you’ve been waiting for. A person who is ready to face his fears is always worthy of respect!

Confirmation by actions

No matter how beautiful words are, they must always be confirmed by actions. Many people, unfortunately, forget about this simple truth. Even after mutual recognition, one must show one’s feelings by treating the person and caring for him.

It’s good if the feelings turned out to be mutual; After confession, you can continue the romantic evening, hug or kiss your partner, or give some nice gift. The main thing is not to speed things up and not make far-reaching plans right away - you need to thoroughly enjoy the new moment in the relationship.

Love is just an incredible feeling. It's worth experiencing.

And you shouldn’t be afraid of refusals, it’s better to try and not regret than to doubt and suffer all your life - what if the feeling could be mutual.