Human life is spent in communication. At work, at home, at a party, he exchanges information and does not even suspect that he is almost always the object of suggestion, that is, he is amenable to verbal hypnosis. The ability to recognize such influence will allow you to avoid self-manipulation, and successful application will ensure that you receive the desired results from communication. How to effectively influence others through this method is written in the book of NLP trainer Anvar Bakirov, “Conversational Hypnosis.” To successfully conduct any negotiations, you need to know the essence, stages and techniques of technology.
Hypnosis concept
A word familiar to everyone has 2 meanings:
- a state of a person similar to a trance or half-sleep, in which he loses the ability to resist the actions of the manipulator and completely submits to his will;
- direct process of suggestion. In any interpretation, hypnosis involves the selection of an authoritarian leader in the dialogue, who gains control over the other person and instills in him the necessary ideas.
How exactly to do this
Firstly, by instilling emotions
. The stronger the emotions, the weaker the mind. A good performance should evoke strong emotions! Here is the emotionality of the speaker himself, and catchy themes, and biting expressions, and lively, rich language...
Secondly, by provoking confusion
. Remember my instant hypnosis lessons? Excellent examples of guaranteed trance induction!
Thirdly, overload
. This is when your speech is so rich in valuable information that, despite all your efforts to speak as clearly as possible, people do not have enough bytes of RAM to retain and digest it all.
Curious, isn't it?
It will be even more interesting further!
From the history of development
Hypnosis has been known for about 3000 years. It was an excellent means of influence of priests on subordinates in Ancient Egypt, Tibet, and India. Used by healers of the East, Ancient Greece and Rome. Over time, it received scientific substantiation and widespread use in psychotherapy. It was used in their practice by Sigmund Freud, Dave Elman, Milton Erickson. The theory of the latter differs from the classical one and is called “Ericksonian hypnosis.” Its essence lies in the fact that the hypnotist’s position is not authoritarian, but a partnership, and helps to free up a person’s knowledge, skills, and experience, and to reveal his potential to achieve his goals. It was this approach that formed the basis of one of the areas of neurolinguistic programming (NLP) - conversational hypnosis - designed to develop the skills of successful people.
The emergence of verbal suggestion techniques
At one time, Milton Erickson demonstrated that hypnotic influence can be carried out during communication unnoticed, using a certain set of tools. NLP specialists have adopted this method. Thus, the technique of verbal influence on human consciousness appeared.
Anvar Bakirov’s book “Conversational Hypnosis” is based on the theory of the above-mentioned psychotherapist. The author reveals in it his vision of the concept and the basic techniques of suggestion. He claims that the content of this source allows you to consciously conduct the communication process and achieve the desired changes in the behavior of the interlocutor.
Basics of technology
Conversational hypnosis is not much different from regular hypnosis. Its components are introduction to trance and suggestion. Influencing a person is not so difficult, you just need to know the basics of this technique. These include a state of trance, in which consciousness gives way to the unconscious, a person’s will weakens, and he becomes susceptible to outside influence. Manifestations of this process can be observed when a person thinks about something, fantasizes, or experiences vivid emotions. This happens frequently throughout the day, which means there are quite a lot of opportunities for suggestion.
Another postulate of this method is the unconscious. It controls the behavior of the individual, Erikson argued. Anvar Bakirov (NLP Technologies: Conversational Hypnosis) adheres to the same opinion in his bestseller. A person performs many actions automatically, under the guidance of instincts, desires and needs. The famous psychotherapist was the first to look at the unconscious as the source of the individual's potential. Through conscious self-control, this inner wealth is often inaccessible, but through the use of conversational hypnosis, a person's capabilities can be activated to achieve his goals.
The basic element of technology is also subjective perception. People understand the same fact differently. For example, if office employees are informed that there is a bomb planted in the next room, someone will run out of the building in hysterics, and someone will slowly walk with an imposing gait to the emergency exit. Everything depends on the inner world of a person, his knowledge, experience, life position.
Attracts attention and largely decides the individual’s further attitude to what is happening that is incomprehensible and unfamiliar to her. The unknown is alarming. This is inherent in the instincts of self-preservation. In order to put a person into a trance, you can confuse him by confronting him with uncertainty. This is another basis of conversational hypnosis technology.
Professional manipulators know that the human psyche has the ability to finish what is unfinished. Those. if you start telling a story to your interlocutor, then change the topic (the consciousness will still retain the previous train of thoughts), and after a while complete your story, then the part of the conversation that was in the middle will be forgotten. During this period, the thoughts necessary for suggestion are voiced.
You also need to know that the unconscious understands only the language of images. Therefore, speech should be simple, as for a child. Then the hypnotist's arguments will hit the target.
Types of NLP
People tend to fantasize a lot about things they don’t know about, so the state of hypnosis seems to them to be something like a complete zombie. With direct influence, the doctor uses hypnosis in therapeutic treatment. The victim completely submits to the hypnotist, having no ability or desire to resist.
There are 3 hypnosis techniques:
- Inconspicuous. Trap words used in the context of ordinary communication. Typically, most people who know how to quickly find company in any society have such programming. They are talkative and know how to present information so that others will listen to them. They often act unconsciously.
- Magnetism. A bit similar to the previous technique, but such a manipulator knows how to motivate the crowd and convince them.
- Direct impact. Using different techniques in combination or in turn. The manipulator purposefully uses the weaknesses of the interlocutor, his fears, desires, etc.
Signs of an altered state
In conversational hypnosis technology, trance is an integral part of the process. It can be determined by the following characteristics:
- fixation of attention on one object;
- fragmentation of perception;
- relaxation;
- changes in body temperature;
- the desire to be calm, not to move;
- incorrect sense of time;
- frozen look;
- inability to control oneself and one's actions.
Probably every person can remember himself in such a state. At such moments, the consciousness is open to suggestion, notes Anvar Bakirov (NLP trainer).
Linear communication
The first version of the structure involves building communication lines in the following sequence:
- Contact with a partner. Its goal is to obtain the interlocutor’s reaction in order to understand how he perceives information and, accordingly, adjust his behavior in the right direction. A person's words, postures, gestures, and emotions will tell you exactly how to communicate with him in order to put him into a trance.
- Abstraction. The individual is designed in such a way that everything unusual scares him. Therefore, often, upon hearing a new proposal, he immediately refuses, and only over time, having thought through all the pros and cons, does he make a decision. He is comfortable when everything goes as usual. The author of the book “Conversational Hypnosis,” Anvar Bakirov, claims that in order to distract a person from meaningful perception, it is necessary to talk to him about something familiar, pleasant, to evoke emotions that will absorb him and thereby shift the focus of attention to the object desired by the hypnotist, thereby reducing control consciousness and opening up possibilities for the formation of beliefs.
- Impact. This is the instillation of ideas, concepts, calls to action. It must be fragmented. The necessary information must be voiced in a calm voice and in a familiar intonation. Thoughts are formulated differently, but their essence should be the same. There should be many such “forwardings”. The more often, the greater the likelihood that the interlocutor will complete our tasks.
At the same time, it will be difficult to track the planned influence on a person’s consciousness, since all three lines of communication will be active and reunited. In this case, the line of contact will last the longest, since everything begins with it and everything ends with it.
How to communicate with the masses (from the experience of great dictators)
Talking to a group of people is different from talking one-on-one.
The more people in a group, the more instinctive, animal nature there is in its behavior. This means that during the performance you take the place of the leader of the pack.
How to confirm your position as a leader and take control of the crowd?
Here are some tips.
First, simplify your speech
. The fewer terms the better. Phrases should be short. The proposals are simple. The thought is clear. To do this, by the way, it is advisable for you to understand the topic of the speech yourself.
Secondly, make the speech clear for understanding
, remove halftones. Special cases, exceptions, “on the one hand..., but on the other hand” and other signs of a sluggish position are not for us! You didn't go out in public to show that you don't have an opinion. You clearly distinguish between what is good and what is bad. And clearly highlight the main thing.
Thirdly, give examples from life
. Simple and clear. Close to everyone. Abstract abstract concepts are good in a scientific conversation between two specialists. For your speeches, stock up on life examples and sharp conclusions. People understand this. And they will appreciate it.
Fourth, and most importantly, speak emotionally
. The topic of the speech should touch you personally. Touch. Include. Make you not sleep at night. Bring in the mistakes that bother you. Share the secrets of mastery that make you burst. Draw perspectives that light you up.
Infect with your emotions! People love the living - after all, in contact with them they themselves awaken.
Remember: only by instilling common emotions in people will you turn the group into a single organism
. Predictable and controllable. And it will be the common emotional field that binds it together.
Stages of human exposure
If we look at the process of conversational hypnosis step by step, we can distinguish the following stages:
1. Attracting attention. Its task is to interest the individual and keep her curiosity. To do this, you can call your future interlocutor, address him by name, offer to look at something, touch him, etc. Only information that is important to a person will arouse his interest. The following factors will help with this:
- values (love, family, wealth...) - this list will definitely contain a couple of concepts that are significant for the individual, which means that he will listen to the hypnotist and maintain a dialogue;
- needs - what is important at the moment: food, accommodation, help, sex, etc.;
- emotions (will attract attention by the fact of surprise and cause mutual experience);
- changes: as mentioned above, a person is frightened by the unknown, so he will not be distracted from the new, unknown, his consciousness will instantly begin to analyze the risks for himself (this is inherent in instincts);
- consistency: intuitively, everyone looks for people who are similar to themselves, because they can be trusted, therefore the same poses, similar views on things, and gestures inspire trust in a partner.
2. Appeal to the human mind. You need to gain trust and put him into a trance. This can be done in different ways. They will be discussed further.
3. Suggestion. This stage is similar to a dotted line with a dot, where the dotted line is communication on main topics, and the dot is the ideas that need to be “introduced into the head” of the interlocutor. In other words, the hypnotist must talk about ordinary topics and periodically voice the desired thought, formulated in different ways. For example, the phrase “appoint me to this position” can be veiled as “I have connections in this area,” “I would work without lunch,” “I have developed new stages of enterprise development.” All these statements boil down to one thing: the person is clearly suitable for the specified position.
4. Hidden period (takes place inside the interlocutor). At this moment, the individual forms his own conclusions. He supports something, rejects something, and thus a decision is formed. The hypnotist's task is to facilitate the adoption of the desired position. The result cannot be predicted, and there is no need to rush it. The “shoots” of conversational hypnosis will become known over time, in the future. At this moment, you need to “mix up the tracks”, as if there was no suggestion, so a familiar voice and familiar intonations should sound. And if the interlocutor remembers only general information from the conversation and not a word of important information, this stage has been completed successfully.
5. Return of personality control. The main task is to complete the contact and prepare the ground for further communication (arrange a meeting, summarize the conversation). In order to return a person to consciousness, you can change the situation, voice, intonation.
The secret to connecting with your audience
The next difficulty: there are a lot of people and they are all different
.
To hypnotize one specific person, you just need to adapt to him (fortunately, hidden hypnosis is rich in various surprisingly powerful techniques)
. What to do if there are a lot of listeners?
There is a remedy.
Please note that for some reason all these people ended up here. So there is something in common between them, and it is this commonality that you should use in your speech.
This could be professional jargon, common values, common enemies, common problems, facts known to listeners, people they know, etc. We use it, refer to it, voice it. Everything that unites them goes to work!
Impact technique
The key to perception is trust—the ability to accept information without checking it. It depends on a number of factors:
1. Image of a person (appearance, demeanor). If he is in our circle, then we can relax with him.
2. Social role (boss or subordinate, seller or buyer). It must be chosen correctly. The behavior of a womanizer is not suitable for a gray-haired, shaking man, the behavior of a salesman is not suitable for a person who is unsure of himself, etc. You need to choose a role depending on the purpose of communication.
3. The myth of personality is the opinion that exists about it in society. It is formed, as a rule, by other people, but if you wish, you can influence the creation of the necessary image yourself.
4. A combination of all the means by which a person expresses his position (body language must confirm the words, a myth must correspond to status, expensive accessories must correspond to tasteful clothing, etc.). Any detail that does not match the appearance will cause suspicion.
5. Adjustment to the partner. He must see that the interlocutor is in many ways similar to him. Bakirov Anvar (“Conversational Hypnosis”) suggests that for this you can copy his movements, intonations, and pace of actions.
By owning and using these tools, you can easily gain confidence in a person. This will relax him and open the gates of consciousness for instilling in him the necessary affirmations.
Importance of technology
The ability to define conversational hypnosis and apply it in practice will provide:
- effective communication with people;
- building the desired format of relationships with loved ones and colleagues;
- correct formation of goals and their achievement;
- success in negotiations;
- convincing a partner in dialogue;
- ability to resolve conflict situations;
- the opportunity to protect yourself from the influence of others.
It must be remembered that this technology must be used to achieve good goals, while bad intentions will lead to negative consequences and remorse.
Reader reviews
To get acquainted with the technique, you can use different sources, in particular, A. Bakirov’s book “Conversational Hypnosis,” which, like everything new, received mixed reviews from readers.
Some strict critics write that they already knew almost everything that was written there, and only a small fraction is about what they simply did not pay attention to in everyday life. Others argue that Bakirov is a good writer. The language of the book is very simple, understandable and accessible to everyone. This is the main advantage of the book. Otherwise, this is ordinary NLP work.
There are also readers who thought that the book was a little complicated, but it was written professionally. But the majority still think that the book is good, and you can find a lot of useful things for communication and life in it.
Conversational hypnosis is a fairly new direction in neuro-linguistic programming. Many of his techniques are used intuitively every day. But if you make mastery of technology conscious, you can achieve good success in various areas of activity: at work, in communication, in your personal life.
Taking the lead
The most convenient situation is when you have leadership by default. For example, you are one of the speakers at a conference. You have been announced, you have been given time - you are speaking. Or you are an artist or a lecturer, and people have gathered to see you. Or you are the boss here, and let those who are dissatisfied write a statement “of their own free will.”
In this case, you are only required to comply with the declared role. This will not cancel instinctive programs, but maintaining leadership is still easier than seizing it.
What to do if you weren’t invited to be a speaker?
Give people the idea that you have valuable information and you will have a support group.
The leader will be the one who promises to give the group what it needs.
. State what problem you can solve, and if it is worthy and you are convincing, you will gain credibility. Carte blanche.
After this, it is useful to consolidate your role:
1. Create a mindset of responsiveness by asking people for a series of simple favors (change seats, look this way, remember this, raise their hand as a sign of this)
.
2. Separate yourself from the masses physically. Stand up if everyone is sitting. Get to the high ground if there is one. Move around the room while the audience sits still.
3. Start keeping your promise! Let everyone see: you speak to the point.
