Depression in women: symptoms and treatment

According to statistics, the fair half of humanity suffers from depression twice as often as the stronger half. Moreover, every fourth woman has experienced deep depression at least once in her life.

The essence of depression
Symptoms of depression in women
Signs of mania
Symptoms of mania in women
Reason for women's predisposition
Additional risk factors
Is depression genetic?
Differences in depression in women
Depression during pregnancy
Does depression affect pregnancy?
Does pregnancy affect the development of depression?
Tips for pregnant women to relieve symptoms of depression
Treatment of depressive disorder in pregnant women
Treatment of postpartum depression
Depression and menopause
How to relieve menopause symptoms?
Treatment of depression in women
Additional materials. Self-diagnosis tests

The essence and definition of depression

Depression is a common, severe mood disorder. It becomes the cause of sadness, a feeling of helplessness and doom, a state of helplessness that was previously not characteristic of a person. Depression can take a moderate form with symptoms such as apathy, lack of appetite, problems falling asleep, decreased self-esteem, and chronic fatigue. Sometimes depression manifests itself in a more serious form. It can last for several months or several years, disrupting the normal life and activity of a woman, her ability to work, as well as relationships with other people. Depression is also strongly associated with the risk of divorce.

What to do if you have a mental disorder

Sometimes or quite often we are unbearable. No one chooses to have a mental disorder, but no one relieves us, adults, capable people with our own characteristics, of responsibility for relationships. We can make them better, more honest, more constructive. In the end, this is in our personal interests: as I already reminded, balance in relationships is not a guarantee, but almost a prerequisite for mental balance.

Tell me honestly.

No one can read minds; you can’t expect your partner to guess everything himself and to guess every time you feel bad. If you have serious plans for life together, tell us about your personal characteristics and triggers. About in what situations you really need help and in what form. Don’t expect that people will understand you and agree with everything right away - accepting the fact that a loved one has a mental illness is really difficult.

But if, after numerous and patient explanations, your partner continues to stand by his prejudices, you will probably have to admit that the relationship will not work.

Another scientifically proven fact: destructive relationships in which a person with an unstable psyche is regularly devalued, accused, and provoked into negative emotions are worse than none at all.

Explain.

Perhaps you don’t really want to act as an educator and rummage through scientific literature. But if you don’t explain (in detail, with links to authoritative sources) to the person you live with what your diagnosis is, no one else will, and then misunderstanding is guaranteed. If it's hard to find words, find some good movies and books. And if there is trust in your relationship, you can invite your partner to talk to your doctor.

Aim for remission.

There are many people in the world with mental disorders who quite happily create families, build houses and give birth to children. But all happy families are similar in one thing: the spouse with the disease is aware of his condition and undergoes therapy. Psychotherapy helps some, others need pills, while for others a healthy lifestyle and self-control are enough.

If you deny the very need to somehow adjust your behavior and believe that your partner is obliged to accept you as you are, with all your problems, you can hardly count on a long-term relationship.

There are also statistics that show: when a partner is not treated, the probability of divorce for various disorders reaches 90%.

Symptoms of depression in women

The mood is predominantly sad, which can be briefly described with the word “none.”
Increased anxiety.
Lack of interest in any type of activity, including entertainment.
Decreased libido and sexual activity.
Feeling restless, irritable, fussy, or tearful.
Feelings of guilt, hopelessness, futility, hopelessness, helplessness, a general pessimistic attitude.
Changing sleep patterns: a woman sleeps either much more or much less than before.
Changes in appetite: a significant increase and the woman gains weight, or a radical decrease and she loses weight.
Decreased energy level (possibly with increased appetite), constant fatigue, and a feeling of some “slowness.”
Suicidal thoughts and attempts.
Difficulty concentrating, difficult to remember anything, difficult to make decisions.
Other multiple symptoms that cannot be treated with traditional methods, such as persistent headache (possibly also migraine), digestive problems, chronic pain of unknown origin.

Since the above symptoms can characterize depression not only as a separate phenomenon, but also as a gradation of bipolar disorder, let us consider the signs of the opposite gradation - mania.

What should you never do?

Are you thinking about how to support a girl in difficult times from a distance? First, read about the traditional mistakes of the stronger half:

"I'll call you later";

This is only justified if you are a surgeon. There are also benefits for firefighters. All. Even if you were a pilot three times, put down the helm and call back right away. Otherwise, you won’t be able to break through the wall of “Everything is fine” and “It doesn’t matter.”

3 important steps

which every woman should go through

Anika Snagovskaya

Author and presenter of women's trainings on harmonizing feminine energy. Master of removing limiting beliefs and master of constellations.

I have prepared three lessons for you that will help you better understand yourself, remove the restrictions that prevent you from feeling loved and living happily.

Video lesson with meditation: 5 states of femininity

You will learn about 5 female states that exist in every woman, how they manifest themselves and which archetypes are most manifested in you and which are not developed.

Video lesson + meditation: How to let go of past relationships

I’ll tell you what you need to do to free your heart from old feelings and break the energy threads connecting you with your past partner.

Audio recording: Neuro-af

Thanks to this neuro-affirmation, you can regain self-love and feel sincere gratitude and happiness for every day.

Top 3 useful materials that will help you know yourself better

And start a new, happy life for yourself.

Video lesson with meditation: 5 states of femininity

Video lesson + meditation: How to let go of past relationships

Audio recording: Neuro-af

Take your gifts!

“sad smiley for all diseases”;

Even if this is not a standard emoji, but a fashionable sticker, it will not replace words.

“1000 and 1 solution option”;

If the issue of life and death is really on the agenda, then the advice is relevant. But this doesn't happen very often.

Did your paternal aunt offend you? There is no need to offer a million ways to kill an impudent person who has stumbled. You just need to listen to the whole stream of offended words, periodically assenting: “What an old fool!”, “Hmm, you said that she wasn’t very good, but I didn’t expect this,” etc.

“Call Lyudka!”

Forwarding is great if you're a router. In other cases, it is better to take the blow of female emotionality. Otherwise, at some important moment after a romantic dinner, you will also be redirected.

How to console a girl from a distance?

“You’ll come and we’ll discuss everything” is a bad option. Imagine that you called an ambulance, and they tell you: “The doctor will be there in a week, then we’ll talk.” Everything would be fine, but blood is gushing from the wound now. And in a week everything will either go away on its own or develop into a disaster. It’s the same story with girlish sorrows. How to help your dear beloved?

Budget ways

talk;

Don’t know how to support a girl in difficult times from a distance? The best way is to talk. It’s not for nothing that all psychotherapists use it.

There is a problem: not everyone knows what to say. Life hack from Irvin Yalom: if you don’t know what to say, say what you feel (you yourself, right now).

For example:

“This and this happened today.” I am so sad.

- Look, I don’t even know what to say. I really want to support you, but I don’t know how to do this when you’re far away. If you were nearby, I would hug you and never let you go. Or at least the whole evening.

And now it’s somehow stupid: my beloved girl is sad, but all I can do is talk on the phone. For me, words are not the most significant help, I would rather spit in that aunt’s face, honestly. Do you think it will fly from Minsk to Moscow?

More ideas

By the way, the passages about “I would like to see how you answered her, you’re fire!” or “You even swear beautifully” come in too.

If the dialogue doesn’t work out, you can watch the series together: watch on the computer, and discuss in a chat or by phone. “Pause it, I’ll go make some coffee,” that’s nice, especially when you’re in different countries or cities.

write a letter;

A long letter with words, yeah. C'mon, don't Google it! Clumsy honesty is more attractive than plagiarized poems about “blood-love-carrots.”

What to write to a girl about? Write how you miss you, what happened, what you are thinking about, what you will do when you meet.

You can send it by email, or you can write it on paper by hand. Seriously, send a paper letter or postcard via snail mail. There is no need to squeeze out three sheets of paper. We'll see how it goes. All the same, 95% - this will be the first time in her life.

If you’re really stuck for ideas, look through Vishnevsky’s “Loneliness on the Internet.” It is not necessary to be sophisticated in erotic descriptions. Just look at how you can communicate through text. Sometimes it happens that it is very difficult to say a phrase out loud. Writing is often easier.

distract with conversation;

There is no need to draw attention right away, let the girl speak out. But when the first tension has passed, you can slightly change the perspective of the conversation.

For example:

“You’re so sad today... But I remember how happy you were when we went to the park.” You come, we'll go again, we'll drink coffee, feed the squirrels... Do you think the Ferris wheel is already working?

Or:

“I’m so glad that you called me.” Honestly, I always got so mad when you told your friends everything and not me. I want to know everything! That's it! What are you doing: sitting or lying? What can you see from your window? Tea or coffee, after all?!

Signs of mania

Bipolar disorder is characterized by the fact that mood can change sharply, occupying completely opposite poles - from mania to depression and vice versa every couple of days, weeks or months. In this case, mania is characterized by a highly energetic state and high spirits. But even if the state of mania may not cause concern due to its inherent positive symptoms, it requires immediate psychotherapeutic help, because at any time it can change to a completely opposite state.

Rule three: don’t just talk, but also do (or just be there)

Typically, depressed people find it extremely difficult to force themselves to do anything. Therefore, any help from you will be welcome. Maybe you can bring groceries from the store, pick up the children from kindergarten and sit with them for an hour, help clean the apartment. One important addition: Only offer help when you are sure you have the time and energy to fulfill the request. Often in a state of depression, people experience irrational fears and cannot do things that a six-year-old child can cope with. At the same time, they are fully aware of the stupidity of their behavior - and this only makes it worse, because when an adult is unable to get out of bed and change clothes for the tenth day in a row or hides under the blanket because something rustles behind the curtain, he feels ashamed and awkward because he believes that others will certainly judge and laugh at him (remember that depression is like a magnifying glass, it magnifies all negative feelings).

Symptoms of mania in women include:

Dominance of high spirits, previously not characteristic of a woman.
Frequent irritability or intolerance.
Low need for rest and sleep.
Generating numerous big ideas.
Increased need for communication.
Jumpy formulation of thoughts.
Excessive, previously unusual, physical activity, including sexual activity (increased libido).
Noticeably increased overall energy level.
Lack of judgment, which sometimes leads to undue risk and behavior.
Inappropriate behavior in public.

What is the reason for women's predisposition to this disorder?

In childhood and pre-puberty, the susceptibility to depression in both sexes is the same. But upon reaching puberty, the risk of this disorder in girls increases significantly and, compared to boys, it occurs almost twice as often.

Most experts tend to consider the cause of such “injustice” to be hormonal changes that occur in the female body throughout life. Changes in hormonal levels become obvious during puberty, pregnancy, premenopause and menopause, as well as in connection with the birth of a child and breastfeeding. Added to this are monthly fluctuations in hormonal balance, which sometimes provoke the occurrence of premenstrual syndrome (PMS) and premenstrual dysphoric disorder (PMDD), a serious condition similar in nature to depression and a group of anxiety disorders.

How to identify a disease in a loved one?

You do not need to have any special education to diagnose depression in a person.

An ill person experiences the following changes in behavior:

sudden changes in lifestyle, atypical isolation and sadness for a person,
loss of faith in a bright future, loss of self-confidence,
almost complete isolation from surrounding people, the person has almost stopped going outside unnecessarily and spends all his time at home,
lack of manifestations of joy and inspiration, the person is no longer interested in what he was recently delighted with,
conversations about the meaninglessness of life and the lack of a bright future. “Life is over,” a person says more and more often,
complete indifference to what is happening, apathy,
slow movements and speech, sharp, nervous twitches,
loss of sense of reality,
lack of desire to move somewhere and do something, a person tries to quickly get rid of communication in order to remain alone,
sloppy appearance, neglect of one’s appearance and even hygiene,
unsmiling and pessimistic.

A once smiling and active person suddenly becomes passive and apathetic, and this state has lasted for quite some time. Most likely, the person is depressed and needs help from loved ones.

Having learned that a loved one is depressed, it is necessary to provide him with all possible help and support.

The apathy characteristic of a depressive state often simply does not allow a person to fully understand his condition and try to get out of it.

In this case, analysis and outside support are simply necessary .

How do you know if it's depression? 4 signs of depression:

Additional risk factors

Among the factors that increase the risk of depression are biological (fertility, heredity), characteristics of interpersonal interaction and specific personal characteristics. In addition, if a woman is exposed to increased stress for a long time or is a single mother, this further increases her chances of developing symptoms of depression.

Additional risks include:

Family experience of mood disorders.
The presence of a mood disorder in a woman in adolescence or early youth.
Loss of a parent in childhood.
Loss of family, friendly support or threat thereof.
Intense or prolonged psycho-emotional stress (possibly dismissal, problematic interpersonal relationships, separation or divorce).
Violence experienced in childhood or recently: physical and/or sexual.
Certain medications.

In addition, some are susceptible to developing postpartum depression, as well as so-called seasonal affective disorder, depending on the time of year.

How is depression different in women?

It appears earlier, lasts longer, relapses occur more often, is more associated with stressful life circumstances, and is subject to seasonality.
Female representatives are more predisposed to self-flagellation, experiencing feelings of guilt and are prone to making suicidal attempts.
Female depression is more often accompanied by various kinds of anxiety disorders and eating disorders (food addiction, psychogenic overeating, nighttime overeating, bulimia (often with a cyclical connection), less often anorexia).

Depression during pregnancy

It is assumed that the expectation of the imminent arrival of a child should be directly correlated with a sense of well-being, which in turn protects a woman from psychological problems. But in practice, it turns out that pregnant women are just as likely to be depressed as other women.

Factors that increase the risk of developing depression during this period include:

Having depression, severe PMS or PMDD before pregnancy.
Age of the pregnant woman: the older the woman, the lower the risk.
Social withdrawal.
Deprivation of social and friendly support.
Marital quarrels.
Uncertainty about the desirability of having a child.

How to support a girl from a distance

How to support a girl in difficult times from a distance? If you receive messages from her: “Damn, this happened here!”, “I’m so sad!” — these SMS messages are more dangerous than they seem. Sad phrases like: “Have pity on me” or “Tell me something good” are only harbingers.

What follows is a real test of strength. Fail to pass it, and the consequences will fall like an avalanche. Someone will be left without warm hugs, and someone will get a notable scandal. Women are like that, just give them a reason, and then separation is not far away.

How to respond to these incomprehensible remarks? What should you say or do to make her feel loved and protected?

Here is a short course of magic phrases and the right actions that will help you earn the trust of a young lady.

Why is it important to know how to provide psychological first aid?

Life is an unpredictable thing: either the girl is away for a session, or the guy is on a business trip. And both need to visit out-of-town relatives periodically. Situations where someone is away alone somewhere are inevitable.

It's always nice to meet after even a short separation. However, communicating at a distance is difficult. Long conversations on the phone are conducive to frank questions. But how to calm a girl down in a difficult situation?

When you are nearby, there are no problems: you hugged, kissed and the threat was over. As a last resort, you can always feed them. After kilometers, the usual schemes do not work.

Those men who were able to lend their shoulder while far away win in the long run. At first glance, nothing may change, but the girl’s subcortex is imprinted: “ideal guy level 80.”

And one more bonus. Anyone who was able to neutralize a suffering woman will be able to come to an agreement even with terrorists. Level up your skill!

Does depression affect pregnancy?

The following trends are highlighted:

The insidiousness of this disorder is that a person stops taking care of himself. For a pregnant woman, this may be critical. Pregnant women suffering from depression are less likely to follow doctors' recommendations, sleep and rest patterns, physical activity and a balanced diet.
This disorder can push a woman to drink alcohol and smoke tobacco, which negatively affects both the health of the expectant mother and her baby.
Worsening depression may interfere with bonding and bonding with the child.

On the other hand, pregnancy also affects the course of depression:

An pregnant woman's increased sensitivity to stressful circumstances and their more severe experience may contribute to the development of a depressive disorder or a worsening of existing symptoms.
Without appropriate therapy, depressive symptoms do not disappear with childbirth, but the name changes - postpartum depression. To assess the signs of depression, take the Test: Postpartum Depression (it is also aimed at pregnant women).

Medicines to treat depression

The choice of medications is determined by the degree of depressive disorder. For treatment on an outpatient basis and for mild cases of the disorder, selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors or two neurotransmitters at once are used: serotonin and norepinephrine.

To understand the principle of their action, you need to delve a little deeper into the anatomy. From school years we remember that nerve cells, called neurons, have processes. Along these processes, nerve impulses are transmitted from one neuron to another, and along with them, neurotransmitters, for example, serotonin or norepinephrine, are transferred.

When everything is in order with the production of neurotransmitters, the nervous system has enough of these substances to trigger bioelectric reactions. And they, in turn, are needed for healthy emotions, energy and well-being. When there are not enough substances, one of the processes natural to a healthy body begins to harm. The fact is that neurons do not use neurotransmitters to their full potential. Often, serotonin, which “settles” on a neighboring cell, does not have time to be used and, with the help of a special protein, is returned back to the parent cell and destroyed.

Drugs used in psychiatry to treat depression from the group of selective serotonin or norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors block the very protein that sends neurotransmitters “for disposal.” Thanks to this, the concentration of neurotransmitters in the intercellular space increases, they become more or less sufficient for the functioning of the nervous system, which improves the patient’s well-being.

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“More complex antidepressant drugs block an enzyme that destroys neurotransmitters,” says psychiatrist Christina Wirth. “But they also have more side effects, so they are not used for mild depression. Drugs from the group of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors are recognized as the gold standard of modern treatment of mental disorders.”

But it happens that these medications do not help. Then the doctor may decide to prescribe other drugs. For example, mood stabilizers, which are called “mood stabilizers,” or antipsychotic drugs in small doses, which are used in the treatment of schizophrenic disorders and hallucinations. It is important to understand that the choice of medication depends on the patient’s condition, and if it is possible not to use “heavy artillery,” the doctor will not prescribe such drugs.

“Antidepressants have side effects,” continues Christina Wirth. - They affect the body as a whole. Drowsiness or, conversely, agitation may develop. The patient may be bothered by nausea, dry mouth, menstrual irregularities, even allergic reactions. But drugs from the group of selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors are the safest and best tolerated.”

The disadvantage of these funds can be considered prolonged action. They have a cumulative effect and begin to work no earlier than after 2-6 weeks. The World Health Organization recommends taking them for six months. If the condition improves, after 6 months the doctor may decide to complete the course of medication.

Tips for pregnant women to relieve symptoms of depression

The preparatory efforts associated with the birth of a baby are energy-intensive and require significant effort and time. But the health of the expectant mother should be given priority. Try not to get hung up on the fact that everything has to be perfect, cut down on current, routine work and do what contributes to your relaxation and calm. Discussing any issues that concern you with your loved ones will help you establish peace of mind and have a beneficial effect on your well-being. Maintain trusting relationships with friends, partner, and loved ones.

If you feel that you are unable to cope on your own, seek professional help from a psychotherapist.

Rule one: do not analyze his behavior and do not give life advice

The last thing your loved one needs is for you to explore the reasons behind their depression and suggest ways to solve the “problem.” He needs support and understanding. Therefore, recognize his right to grieve, be sad, and experience all other negative feelings. And there is no need to prove that the world is beautiful and there is absolutely no reason to be sad. A person who is experiencing symptoms of depression would be happy to return to normal, but in his condition it is difficult to believe that life will ever sparkle with all its colors again. And the more often you repeat that there is no reason to be upset, that there are people who are worse off now, the deeper the sufferer will plunge into the abyss of his already unhappy thoughts. “But it’s true, some people don’t have money, children ask for food - but there’s nothing to give them, and I’m sitting in my apartment with a refrigerator full of food and can’t move - I’m a loser.” Instead of saying: “There is no reason to be sad,” it is better to say: “Everything will be fine!” Depressed people feel that no other human being can understand what they are feeling. They feel lonely and believe that no one cares about them. Therefore, it will be very helpful if you make it clear that you are nearby. Say these simple words: “I’m here if you need anything,” and a person will know that someone in this world still cares about him.

Treatment of depressive disorder in pregnant women

In this case, the treatment plan and the chosen strategy must be carefully thought out, and the risks for the developing fetus and the pregnant woman must be weighed. Only a psychotherapist can effectively cope with such a task, who will either prescribe medications to get results as quickly as possible without the risk of harming the child, or recommend special psychotherapeutic methods for a quick and most reliable result.

Remember, you cannot select and self-prescribe medications, especially for a pregnant woman. This should be done by a doctor based on the results of diagnosing a particular case.

Treatment of postpartum depression

It is treated in the same way as any other form of depression, which involves the use of psychotherapeutic methods and/or medications. If a woman is breastfeeding during therapy, this should be reported to the attending psychotherapist in order to draw up a correct treatment plan. Since it is assumed (not yet confirmed) that the active substances included in antidepressants may pass into breast milk in small quantities, the doctor will need to weigh the possible risks and benefits of using antidepressants and, perhaps, focus more on non-drug therapy for depression.

Since the birth of a child and, in connection with this, a change in lifestyle can affect both the psychological well-being of the woman herself and her relationship with her husband, it is recommended to pay attention to the recommendations of psychologists on how to improve relationships with her husband after the birth of a child, as well as what prejudices the mother should get rid of so as not to drive yourself into depression.

How can a woman get out of depression without medication?

When the doctor does not see the need to use medications, cognitive behavioral therapy helps restore mental health. Its task is to increase a woman’s energy potential and return her to her former activity.

During treatment, the patient receives tasks from the doctor - to do a little more every day than yesterday. The “load” is increased gradually, and it often takes weeks or months to return to normal everyday skills. But under the guidance of a specialist, the therapy works and helps women cope with depression without medication.

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“We need to introduce pleasure into life,” notes psychiatrist Christina Wirth, “everything that made us happy before. You should not expect a woman to take the initiative herself and remember some activities that are pleasant for her. Most likely, in a depressed state there will be no such desires. Therefore, actions must be mechanical, mandatory. If a woman previously liked to read, she should read daily. Let it be a little - just a couple of pages or 15 minutes, but every day.”

Relatives can help bring happiness back into the life of a mother or spouse. The specialist warns that it is dangerous to demand that a woman pull herself together, get out of bed, and go about her usual activities. All this will not work, and the lack of support from relatives will only worsen the condition. It is important to remember that depression is not laziness or a momentary blues, it is a disease that cannot be cured by taking a pill. It disrupts the state of the body, seriously affects well-being, and changes natural processes in the body. It takes time to restore mental health, but the help and patience of loved ones will become a necessary support for a woman on the path to recovery.

Depressive disorder and menopause

By analogy with other periods of a woman’s life, during menopause there is a close relationship between hormonal levels, physical manifestations and emotional reactions and experiences. Among the physical symptoms, the most common are hot flashes or chills, excessive sweating, dry skin, excess weight gain and a number of others. Mental symptoms include irritability, sleep disturbances, tearfulness, headaches and migraines. These symptoms, together with increased anxiety, cause depression. Most often, menopause begins after 45 years of age, but due to the characteristics of a particular organism (for example, surgical removal of the ovaries), it can begin earlier.

What are the dangers of severe depression?

Behavior changes. From simply avoiding their usual activities to changing their lifestyle, people with depression end up in sects and extremist organizations. From stopping self-care to attempting suicide.
Loss of usual social connections: dismissal from work, family breakdown, loss of friends. What has formed around a person over the course of life, forming his environment, is destroyed by severe depression.
General exhaustion: dystrophy, weight loss, metabolic disorders.
The development of psychosomatic diseases: cachexia (weight loss), skin rashes, asthma attacks, gastrointestinal disorders (constipation, diarrhea), temperature regulation disorders, excessive sweating, hypotension or hypertension and many other disorders.

How can a woman cope with menopausal symptoms?

Eat healthy foods and maintain moderate but regular exercise (workout is effective in controlling anxiety levels).
Get involved in a creative activity, find an interesting hobby that will guide you towards pleasant achievements.
Find a technique that can balance your mental state: this could be meditation, certain relaxation breathing techniques, yoga (other techniques, strategic self-help for anxiety).
Try to keep the air in the bedroom at a cool temperature, which will help prevent sweating during sleep and, as a result, sleep disturbances.
Seek emotional support from friends, close family, or professional help as needed.
Maintain family relationships, communicate in different interest groups, strengthen friendships with other people.
Follow your doctor's instructions regarding taking vitamins, dietary supplements, minerals and other medications prescribed to you.
During periods of frequent hot flashes, give preference to loose-fitting clothing.

How to help a man?

Although men suffer from depression much less often than women, they suffer from the disease much more severely.

Due to the inflexibility of the psyche, it is much more difficult for men to get out of a depressive state. However, there are ways to help the stronger sex cope with the oppressive condition.

Guy

Tips on how to get your boyfriend out of depression:

diversify his life, leisure time, try to keep him busy with some active activity ,
remind him of how much his girlfriend needs him and how much she misses his cheerful smile,
bring to a frank conversation , try to understand the reasons for this condition,
do something unusual that will throw the guy out of his usual rut,
ask for help , move a closet, fix the TV, so that the guy feels needed and useful.

To my husband

Tips on how to get your husband out of depression:

Bring them to a serious conversation, have a heart-to-heart talk , discuss all pressing issues.
Don’t demand anything from him, don’t burden him with household chores, try to be kind and affectionate with him.
Try to bring back pleasant memories , return the feeling of former love and passion to the marital relationship.
Try to keep your spouse busy with some useful activity .
Arrange a meeting with friends whom he has not seen for a long time, for example, army comrades.

How to survive postpartum depression? Read about it here.

How to support a depressed man? Advice for women: