Good day! Lyudmila Redkina is with you, and today we are studying the most important human function. Without what will a person not be a person? Without what is most of the information around us lost? What is it that a woman especially cannot live without for a day? Of course, without communication! Communication helps us develop, become smarter and satisfy all our needs. Excuse me, you can’t even go to the toilet in an unfamiliar city if you don’t find out where it is. What can we say about the need for recognition or respect if a person does not communicate?! So, in this article we talk about how to communicate with people correctly, and what we get in the process of communication.
COMPLETE LIST OF HUMAN SKILLS
Basic rules of communication
Rule #1
Allow other people to be who they are, and do not try to remake someone according to your standards.
- Firstly, it is completely useless, people do not change.
- And secondly, all attempts by outside influence are perceived extremely negatively by people and spoil relationships.
Rule #2
Speak only good things about people, otherwise just keep your mouth tightly shut.
Support and approval are the most powerful catalysts for good relationships.
Rule #3
Don't allow yourself to be arrogant towards other people.
A note of superiority in a voice can cause irreparable damage to the best relationships. If you want to maintain good relationships with others, their actions or words cannot be ridiculed. People do not forgive humiliation either.
Rule #4
Show sincere interest in the life and feelings of the other person, then you will not have problems finding a topic for conversation.
And there are plenty of reasons for praise. By the way, praise and flattery are radically opposite concepts; they should not be confused.
Rule #5
Try to look for positive traits in each person and focus maximum attention on them.
Each of us has shortcomings, the secret of good relationships lies in the ability not to notice them.
Rule #6
Once and for all, give up criticism of other people, try to recognize their right to make mistakes.
Remember that every action can be viewed from two opposing points of view, and it is not yet known which of them is correct.
Rule #7
Every person makes a lot of effort to increase his own importance in the eyes of other people.
You should give up your sense of self-importance and allow other people to feel important.
Rule #8
Watch your own words and actions.
If you have done something inappropriate, apologize immediately and do not allow yourself to offend other people.
Rule #9
Never give orders to anyone. If you want your words and advice to be listened to, do not impose them, wait until you are asked for advice.
Rule #10
Never respond with irritation to the irritation of the person living next to you.
Take his irritation as a request for help, support and sympathy.
Rule #11
When communicating with people, try to talk less and listen more.
By the way, by listening to other people's problems, you get to know the person better, and therefore strengthen your friendship with him.
Rule #12
If you come up with a good idea, try to pretend that the idea came from your interlocutor.
Rule #13
If your interlocutor expresses thoughts that, in your opinion, are wrong, do not interrupt him or try to prove your point of view.
Rule #14
Give up any disputes once and for all.
By the way, the fastest way to end an argument is to admit that your interlocutor is right.
Rule #15
Give gifts to your loved ones without waiting for a special occasion.
Rule #16
If you feel irritation in the depths of your soul, do not show it openly.
Instead of demonstrating your feelings, try to find the true reasons for this state and eliminate them.
Rule #17
Turn the vector of interest towards other people, turning it away from yourself.
Rule #18
When you talk to a person, look him in the face and address him by his first and patronymic.
Treating people with courtesy and respect strengthens the bonds between people.
Rule #19
If the conversation drags on for too long and you are forced to interrupt it, try to do it on a positive note so that your interlocutor retains the most pleasant memories and a good mood.
Rule #20
Learn to forgive. We must forgive everything and everyone:
- Firstly, you need to forgive yourself not only for mistakes and wrong actions, but even for negative thoughts.
- Secondly, you should forgive all the insults that others cause to you. You should not accumulate negative emotions in your soul.
The most tender communication in the world occurs between those who are not interested in communication. Marcel Proust
Appearance rules
Dress code
In your apartment you can walk around as you like, even in pajamas and funny socks. If you arrive at the office, or even more so for a meeting, please follow the dress code. Otherwise, the wrong impression may be formed about you. Representatives of the older generation may consider you frivolous, superficial and even - oh horror! - incompetent . Yes, we understand that professionalism does not depend on appearance. But the traditions of society are strong, and rebelling against them is stupid and short-sighted. You are not 15 years old.
Basic dress code rules:
- for men - a business suit or shirt with trousers. Jacket, shirt and jeans are acceptable. For women - a suit, blouse and pencil skirt, no minis and, God forbid, deep necklines;
- minimum accessories. For men, watches and cufflinks are acceptable. For women - a maximum of two accessories: earrings and a ring, a chain or earrings, and so on. If you have sets of jewelry, do not wear all the items at once, it is vulgar;
- neat haircut, well-groomed hair, for men - a styled beard and mustache, if any;
- neat manicure, well-groomed hands;
- clean shoes in any weather, even if you got to the office by subway or dog sled;
- no tattoos or piercings in visible places. If you have a large, visible tattoo, it is better to hide it under clothes. If you establish a good relationship with your partner, you can show it later, but at first it’s better not to take risks. You don't know what views he holds.
The more important the meeting or negotiations, the more strictly the dress code must be observed. Remember, this is in your best interest.
Dress code for women and men
Gestures, movements, facial expressions
It sounds funny, but in fact, many deals have been broken because the partner made an inappropriate gesture or was too familiar. It is clear that everything is subjective: an open person will not be intimidated if the interlocutor actively waves his arms or blows kisses to everyone. Still, you should adhere to the basic rules - at least at the first meeting . And then you will see for yourself how the interlocutor reacts.
Please note the following points:
- straight posture, restrained movements without fussiness;
- look into the eyes - confident, firm, but not arrogant;
- restrained facial expressions, try to control emotions. In difficult situations, when you want to curse or, conversely, laugh, put on a “poker face”;
- Tactile contact is allowed only in the form of handshakes. Leave pats on the shoulder, tight hugs, and especially kisses for loved ones: not all people love the touch of strangers. According to the rules of etiquette, only a handshake is permissible - preferably a short and energetic one.
Tip: practice in front of a mirror in advance or ask a loved one to “read” your facial expressions or movements . If there are signs of nervousness, fussiness, or too violent emotional reactions, eradicate these habits. Remember that many entrepreneurs have studied body language and know the basic rules. For example, eyes slanted to the left are a sign of lying. Arms crossed on the chest - a desire to isolate oneself. Whoever the toes of the interlocutor’s shoes point to is the one who is most important to him at the moment. And so on and so forth - the Internet is full of such advice.
Workplace is ok
It’s cool, of course, to justify the mess on your desk and in your office by saying that you are a creative person, but I’m afraid your partners won’t understand. Practice shows that order on the table magically clears your thoughts and brings order to your head . Try it and see for yourself!
Disorder in the workplace is unacceptable
An example of communication psychology from the school curriculum
Read the tips below, which ones will you use when communicating with friends?
- Be friendly and friendly.
- Live in peace with each other.
- Conquer evil with good.
- Do good and do not be afraid of anyone.
- Speak boldly about a good deed.
- Love your neighbor as yourself.
- Win hearts with love, not fear.
- Don't be afraid of the knife, but of the tongue.
- Think, think about it, and say it.
- Be patient with everyone for a long time.
Question:
Determine the type of sentences based on the purpose of the statement. Why are sentences of this type used here?
Answer:
Sentences No. 1, 2, 6, 9, 10 are motivating, they teach and advise.
Etiquette for women
Well-groomed appearance, rich and cultured speech, goodwill, good manners, elegance and style, sophisticated manners, the ability to restrain excessive emotionality, posture, gait, charm and intelligence - these are the main distinguishing features of a real lady. In order to develop these qualities in yourself, you need to know the basics of etiquette for women:
- skillfully emphasize the advantages and hide the flaws of your figure with the help of clothes, do not blindly chase fashion;
- When choosing a wardrobe, we always take into account the format of the event; clothing must match the situation;
- makeup can be used for daytime or evening, you shouldn’t try on the “smoky eye” look for morning lectures - it looks vulgar;
- the aroma of your perfume enchants those around you, and does not suffocate you;
- You can fix your makeup and comb your hair only in the restroom;
- loud laughter, excessive gesticulation, strongly expressed facial expressions do not make a girl beautiful;
- swear words and curses should never escape the lips of representatives of the fair sex;
- punctuality is a rare gift for women; remember, being late for a meeting by more than 15 minutes is bad manners;
- the ability to conduct a conversation, maintain a conversation on various topics, and be open to communication;
- gait and posture are an important contribution to the overall image of a woman.
Bonus: 10 more golden rules of communication [UPD]
How to benefit from communicating with people and share the best with others?
Regardless of who you are: a psychologist, a businessman, or just an attentive spouse or friend, the rules of good communication are the same for everyone. Good conversation involves two things: listening and speaking. And for each of them there are 5 golden rules. It sounds simple enough, but many people forget that good communication involves not only talking, but also listening.
Moreover, it's safe to say that listening is a more important component: how can you know what to talk about if you don't first understand what the audience wants to hear?
Business relationship
Now we will talk about personal relationships - or about human weaknesses, as you wish.
Don't reveal trade secrets
Neither the financial information of your company, nor similar information of your partners, investors, clients. Don’t tell anyone about this and strictly forbid your employees.
Don't gossip
The business world is actually very narrow. There is a great temptation to discuss your partner or client in a small circle. Even if you really want to, we beg you, don’t do it! Firstly, rumors spread quickly, and they simply won’t want to deal with a chatterbox. And secondly, who will guarantee that tomorrow they will not discuss you in the same way? Therefore, it is better to stay away from such conversations.
Don't talk too much
It happens that partners become friends - and you can tell friends a lot. However, tomorrow the situation may change, and yesterday’s partner may become your competitor or go over to the latter’s side . Personal or negative information about you may be used for their own purposes. Black PR is a powerful weapon in the struggle for profit and power. And then - goodbye, reputation!
And once again, finally: it is impossible to follow all these rules. We've ranked them from optional to most important. Roughly speaking, coming to a meeting in jeans is excusable; calling Ivan Ivanovich Ivan Nikiforovich is undesirable, but understandable, but giving away secret information is impossible even under torture . Good luck in business!
What rules of communication do you try to use in your life?
Psychologists recommend the following set of communication rules for every day:
- Show genuine interest in other people.
- Smile.
- Remember that for a person, the sound of his name is the sweetest and most important sound of human speech.
- Be a good listener. Encourage others to tell you about themselves.
- Talk about what interests your interlocutor.
- Make people feel important to you and do it sincerely. This rule is the most important!
What rules of communication between people do you know, and which do you try to use in your life?
Please share in the comments. Yabrova Ksenia May 16, 2021
Rules for holding meetings and negotiations
Entire books have been written on this topic. Here we present 7 basic rules.
- You are invited to negotiations at least two weeks in advance.
- The optimal time to start negotiations is morning (10-11 o'clock).
- At the beginning of the meeting, participants need to be introduced to each other.
- Usually the invited party starts the conversation.
- It is not customary to interrupt the speaker, or argue with the participants on your own.
- It is advisable to keep negotiations within 2 hours. If this time is not enough, you should take a coffee break.
- During conversations, turn off your mobile phone.
Compliance with the basic rules and principles of business etiquette will help you quickly gain regular clients and move up the career ladder. It is not necessary to remember all the nuances - for example, the rules for formatting paper letters can always be found in the reference book. It is important to know the basic norms - they will help you navigate in any situation.
Useful articles on the topic:
- 10 ways to end a phone conversation without offending the other person
- How to respond to client projects?
- What is a contact report?
Author: Valentina (KadrofID: 13) Added: 04/28/2018 at 21:27
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Everyday speech
Everyday language practice is also built on the principles of maintaining social hierarchy. Any conversation begins with a greeting, and the youngest greets the elder first, the man greets the woman, the young girl greets the older man, and the junior greets the elder.
According to the form, the greeting is classified as:
- time indication (Good morning!);
- wishes of health (Hello!);
- emotion (Glad to meet you!);
- expression of respect (My respect!);
- specific form (I wish you good health!).
The main part of the conversation can be based on three scenarios: work, solemn or mournful. The type of situation is indicated by various speech formulas uttered by the interlocutors (“Accept our condolences,” “Allow me to congratulate you!”, “I would advise you,” etc.).
It is customary to end communication by saying goodbye and wishing all the best.
Trust is very important
In any relationship, be it friendship, love, or just a relationship with a stranger, learn to trust. Most people are afraid to say something about themselves because they are worried that someone else will find out. Statistics show that most people think only about themselves, which means that the likelihood that the interlocutor will remember some little thing from your conversation is extremely small. But you shouldn't talk about all your deepest secrets with strangers. Everyone has their skeletons in their closet.
