Girls love to talk on the phone. They are ready to hang on the phone for days. Telling a friend about personal, everyday and important matters. A sea of jokes has been created on this topic. But most of all, women love to hear the voice of their beloved man on the other end of the line. He called, what a joy!
The first, second and third call is not an insignificant moment, especially if the young people barely know each other. A competent line of conversation will attract a guy to a girl even more, and vice versa. What to talk about with a guy on the phone to arouse even more sympathy? Several interesting topics and skillful behavior will make the young lady a wonderful interlocutor.
Phone call rules
Proper communication on the phone is the key to a successful conversation. How to conduct a dialogue correctly?
- Call at a convenient time for your interlocutor. Just in case, ask if you are distracting him from important matters.
- Don't forget to greet the guy and introduce yourself, especially if you decide to call him for the first time.
- If a guy calls you himself, pick up the phone after the second, or at least after the third ring.
- Think about the purpose of your call in advance.
- Don't waste time on empty talk if you are calling about a specific issue. Get to the point right away, you can chat later.
- Try not to be nervous, be relaxed.
- Know how to listen and not interrupt.
- Answer your guy's questions honestly and meaningfully.
- Try not to keep it on your phone for too long. He may have other important things to do.
- Don't worry if the conversation doesn't go the way you want. Perhaps this is just not your person.
- Don't eat while talking on the phone.
- Try not to discuss personal issues if you are in a crowded place. As a last resort, move away from people nearby.
- Have a few interesting questions ready to avoid awkward, long silences in the conversation.
It might be interesting: why does the guy write every day, but doesn’t invite me anywhere.
How to tell by voice that a guy is interested in conversation
A telephone conversation limits the opportunity to see the interlocutor, his facial expressions, and posture. This is usually how the reaction to the words spoken and the interest in the conversation are determined. If the guy answers all your questions in detail, with enthusiasm, in his ringing voice you hear joy, smile, laughter, then the conversation is on the right track.
When monotonous phrases and long thoughts are heard in response, the conversation does not go well. The guy is reluctant to answer your questions. There are two reasons: his thoughts are busy with other things or the conversation is boring. When choosing a topic for conversation, make sure that it is within his range of interests.
After your several questions, it is clear that he is avoiding answers, saying something incomprehensible? He probably has no desire to continue the conversation. In this case, there is no point in talking further. Tell him something nice, like, “You seem like such an interesting person. I’d like to talk to you another time,” and just say goodbye. Then he will have a pleasant impression of you, and the unsuccessful conversation will soon be forgotten.
Sport
Many guys are interested in sports, so you can talk to them about their favorite topic:
- How do you feel about sports activities?
- Do you watch any sporting events on TV?
- What is your favorite sport?
- Why do you like this sport?
- Have you ever taken part in a sports competition?
- Does everyone in your family play sports or is it just you?
- Do you read sports literature?
- Do you go to the gym?
- Have you ever dreamed of becoming a professional athlete?
- Would you like your children to play sports?
Features of guys' interests
Not all young people are ready to talk about banal topics that theoretically interest males. A young man may not understand cars, fishing, hunting or sports - this is nothing unusual. If a girl understands that the conversation is not going well, and the interlocutor is not able to support her, then it is worth changing the topic of conversation, otherwise the man will begin to experience discomfort.
You don’t have to come up with questions or think about what topics should be discussed with a specific person. Sometimes a young man is much more interested in learning about how his beloved lives, how she is doing, what she is concerned about. It’s normal to discuss your everyday troubles and problems, but you shouldn’t reduce everything to whining either - it’s important to maintain a balance.
Constant discussions and debates can tire a young man, so you should not overload him with information. Often you want to chat about something simple, vital. If a woman is not sure about the guy’s involvement in the dialogue, then you can directly ask him what he wants to discuss.
Cinema and music
Absolutely all people listen to music or watch movies from time to time. The conversation on this topic is universal:
- Do you watch movies at home or in the cinema?
- What series can you recommend for me to watch?
- Do you have a favorite actor/musician?
- Have you ever been to a concert of your favorite band/performer?
- How do you feel about superhero films?
- Do you like to listen to music through speakers or headphones?
- Which cinema do you think is definitely worth visiting?
- Is there a movie that you have watched several times?
- What song can support you in difficult times?
- What genre of music do you prefer to listen to?
Interesting article: what to write to a man after a long silence.
Examples of good phrases for the first message
There are four main ways to start a VKontakte correspondence:
- General approach.
The universal phrase for starting acquaintance is “Hello. Are you dating online?” - that’s all. You immediately show your intentions, allowing the other person to respond accordingly. - Sincerity.
Honestly describe the purpose of your acquaintance to the person. Try to be as sincere as possible. For example, “Hi. I understand that we don’t know each other, but now I’m terribly missing new people in my life, new communication, new acquaintances. Judging by your page, you are a very interesting person, so maybe we can try to chat? We both have nothing to lose from this.” In this case, honesty will be disarming - it will be difficult for your interlocutor to refuse you. - Playfulness.
Come up with a funny reason, even if it's a little absurd. For example, “Hi! I’m very bored right now, please recommend some good movie.” Yes, such requests don’t seem to be addressed to a stranger, but this only makes it all the more intriguing. - Opinion.
Give your opinion on something you see in a person's posts. It’s better if it’s positive, although it won’t hurt to argue a little if the topic is not very serious. "Hello. I saw your post in which you say that “The Alchemist” is the most powerful book by Paulo Coelho. But it seems to me that the ideas expressed in “The Diary of a Magician” are even deeper and more interesting. What was it about the book that hooked you?” Naturally, you need to focus on the person and his posts, trying to understand who wants to talk about more serious topics, and who, on the contrary, would like light communication.
These are just examples of the first messages. Be creative - and then the guy will definitely respond.
Cars
If you know that your interlocutor is a motorist, then you can ask him the following questions from the list:
- How old have you been into cars?
- Do you only know how to drive a car or something else?
- Why did you decide to buy this particular car?
- Was it difficult for you to learn your license?
- How old were you when you first got behind the wheel?
- What music do you prefer to listen to in the car?
- Did you buy the car yourself or did your parents help you?
- What brand of car did you dream of as a child?
- Do you walk more often or travel by car?
- How often do you prefer to change cars?
You might be interested in the article: How to meet a guy on the Internet.
A fisherman sees a fisherman from afar7
Fishing is a great hobby. In ancient times, primitive men fed themselves by hunting animals and sea creatures. Currently, fishing is considered a sport or recreational activity. Men gather in company, make fires, set up tents, and arrange fishing gear. When talking about a guy’s hobbies, you can ask the following questions:
- How often do you go fishing?
- Where are the hot spots?
- What's the biggest catch you've made?
In the end, you can reveal a desire to accompany your sweetheart on your next fishing trip.
General hobbies and interests
If you meet a guy who shares your hobbies, then you are very lucky. A topic for conversation with him will come naturally:
- Can you play any musical instrument?
- Do you like to argue and prove your point of view?
- Would you like to be on a desert island?
- What was the last book you read?
- Do you like watching cartoons?
- How often do you visit exhibitions or art galleries?
- What films have you watched lately?
- Would you like to attend a concert of your favorite band?
- Is your work related to your hobby?
- Do you write poetry?
Do you know how to flirt by text?
Rules for successful flirting on the phone
Take a break
Be friendly
People whose work involves frequent telephone conversations know that this art has its own special etiquette. For example, one of the rules of telephone etiquette says that you need to conduct a conversation while smiling. Thanks to this simple technique, your interlocutor will feel your goodwill and disposition towards him.
Encourage him to talk
In a real conversation, we easily read the interlocutor’s reaction to our words by his gaze or facial expressions. When talking on the phone, we do not see our interlocutor and therefore cannot always determine how interested he is in listening to us. To interest a man, try to keep the conversation going, letting him talk. Do not interrupt his monologue, but at the same time, show “signs of life” from time to time. While listening to him, sometimes clarify some details, ask again and simply emphasize that you are very interested.
Give compliments
Compliments are always appropriate, even when talking on the phone. However, do not go too far so that the compliment does not turn into open flattery. For example, you can tell a guy that his voice is similar to the voice of some famous singer, or that only an exceptionally kind person can have such a pleasant timbre. If a man feels special in a conversation with you, he will probably want to continue the acquaintance.
Call him by name
If you want to please a man, call him by his name instead of faceless pronouns. The sound of one's own name is pleasant for every person to hear. In addition, such an address gives intimacy to the conversation. But again, don't overdo it. If you repeat his name too often, it will seem strange and unnatural.
Be taciturn
If a guy asks you what you did tonight, you don’t need to describe your pastime to him in great detail. Simply say that you went to meet friends or solve work problems. Let there be some understatement in your speech, which the man will come up with himself.
Don't be afraid to ask questions
If you are talking to a guy you don't know well, don't be afraid to ask questions that interest you. Of course, it is better to leave questions about his earnings or desire to start a family until a later stage of dating, however, you may well ask about his profession, musical preferences, favorite vacation spots, etc.
Speak consistently
When talking to a guy, don't jump from one topic to another. Men learn consistent and logically structured speech more easily. Therefore, if your conversation has gone in one direction, but you suddenly remembered something important, finish or listen to the end and only then start a new topic, otherwise it will be difficult for a man to understand your train of thought.
Focus on common topics
Even if you are talking to a guy you don't know well, try to find similarities that unite you. Perhaps you like to read the same books or listen to the same music, or maybe you are both fond of sports or cannot imagine your life without hiking in the mountains. In order for your interlocutor to want to communicate with you in the future, he must feel a “kindred spirit” in you.
Remember etiquette
According to the rules of etiquette, a telephone conversation should be ended by the one who started it. If you can no longer continue the conversation, simply ask him to call you back at a time convenient for you. After finishing the conversation, the man will probably ask permission to call you back or make an appointment. At this point, stop flirting and forget about your tactical reticence. If you want to continue communication, clearly indicate a convenient time for you to talk or meet. Let the man know that you are interested in him.
Source
Events of the day
A neutral topic of conversation is to discuss how your day was. Surely, you will be able to tell each other a lot of interesting things:
- Did you have a good day at work?
- What made you smile today?
- How do you like the weather today?
- Are you still full of energy or are you waiting for the weekend to come?
- Did your boss praise your project?
- What's your mood today?
- What did you do at work during your lunch break?
- How are you planning to spend the evening?
- Are you very tired from your work/study?
- What are your plans for tomorrow?
Future plans
Having serious and specific plans for the future is an indicator of a person’s seriousness. Talk to a guy about the future, and you will understand who is really in front of you:
- Is it important for you to realize your potential in your chosen profession?
- How do you see your future in 5 years? And in 10?
- Would you like to have children in the future?
- What do you think is the ideal age to start a family?
- Why did you choose this particular profession?
- Do you want to be like your parents?
- Is family or career more important to you?
- Would you prefer an unstable job with money? Or a fixed stable income?
- Do you think you are an expert in your profession? Or do you still have something to learn?
- Are there any actions that you are proud of?
Find out why guys don't meet girls.
How to interest a man by correspondence - psychological techniques
Now you will learn the basic principles for effective correspondence with men.
And they sound like this:
1) Write messages shorter than his.
It often happens that you write an SMS to a girl, and in response you receive a poem, this demonstrates her increased interest, which kills the intrigue.
Above you see an example of my correspondence with a girl on Vkontakte, when I recorded a voicemail for 5 seconds, and in response received 6 messages and two questions in a row. This immediately underestimates its value in my eyes. Moreover, the last message creates in my head the idea that you can communicate with her only out of boredom, because she herself gave me this idea to think about.
And now you see correspondence where the girl perfectly maintains the proportion of messages and maintains her value.
2) Don't respond to messages right away.
Equipment and gadgets
Almost every modern person has gadgets. What is their role in your boyfriend’s life?
- Do you spend a lot of time talking on the phone?
- Do you like to play computer games?
- How old were you when you got your first computer?
- Has it ever happened that you sat at the computer all night?
- Does it annoy you if your interlocutor regularly looks at his phone?
- Could you give your girlfriend social network passwords?
- Which social network do you spend the most time on?
- Do you approve of virtual dating?
- Could you give up using your phone/tablet/laptop for at least one day?
- Have you ever experienced a virtual romance?
How to build a dialogue correctly?
General rules:
- You need to talk about what will be interesting to her, and not about what you know.
- General topics of conversation will make the date interesting and fly by in a flash.
- Not only listen to the answers, but also respond to them.
- Don’t chatter non-stop, but don’t limit yourself to monosyllabic “yes,” “no,” “maybe,” “probably,” etc. The dialogue must be complete.
- Smile and joke.
- Don't lie, even for self-promotion.
How to avoid pauses?
A girl will be interested in a guy who knows how to carry on a conversation.
Develop your word generator. You should have 3-4 humorous stories in your arsenal that will fill pauses in the conversation.
The topics are very different - your kitchen battles, travel, etc. If your life is full of events, that is, rich, of course there will be a lot of stories in your memory.
Take a few quotes and use them in your conversation. Just don’t quote statuses, which are abundant in VK. Choose small but impressive ones.
Take into account 5 phrases that will save a date if you have nothing to talk about:
Test the waters
On the first date, you definitely need to learn more about each other.
Tell us about yourself:
- How old are you.
- What do you do.
- About your family.
- Spending free time.
- About plans for the future, etc.
Give the lady the opportunity to talk about herself too. Men's emotionality is consonant with women.
Mutual understanding and sympathy will come faster. Feel free to use emoticons, exclamations like “Wow”, “Damn!”, “Hey”, “Wow!”, “Oh”, “Mmm”, “Wow!”.
Let's keep the conversation going
To make a girl fall in love, show concern. Men have not been guilty of this lately; they love only themselves, their beloved. Therefore, a caring and attentive guy will immediately stand out from the background of “narcissists”.
Showing concern can be different:
- give away your jacket in cold weather,
- make a secret gift in the form of flowers with a note, etc.
Many people now, on principle, do not pay for a girl in a cafe, etc., under the guise of equality. Some women have long come to terms with this and give money for themselves.
And yet such relationships cannot be called correct. This is elementary redneck.
If a girl manages to meet a man who follows traditions (pay for her at the cinema, in a cafe), then she will make her choice in favor of him, because “knightly” behavior is always held in high esteem.
Basic mistakes when communicating with girls:
- Excessive flattery – give compliments in doses.
- Monotony and lack of initiative - your meetings are the same, you walk the same route. If any changes occur, they are usually initiated by the girl. Such monotony will quickly get boring, and she will refuse meetings.
- Obscene language and parasitic words.
- Negativity is always repulsive.
- Distraction. You miss part of her conversation, which becomes obvious during further meetings. You get distracted by talking on your cell phone or texting someone. Perhaps this is your way of trying to show her your importance. But in her eyes it says how bored you are. And this will not add points to you in her eyes.
To communicate with a girl, you don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not, because she’s also a person with her own pros and cons.
It’s better to be yourself, try to liberate yourself and everything will definitely work out.
Study, work
A person spends most of his life at work or study. Some aspects of your professional or academic life can be discussed with your boyfriend over the phone:
- Why did you decide to enter this university?
- Do you love your job? Or do you go there just for the money?
- Would you like to work in a creative position?
- How is your thesis project going?
- Were you very nervous when taking your first session?
- Has your diploma been useful to you in your life?
- Do you think a modern person can do without education?
- Do your parents approve of your professional choice?
- Are you disappointed in your chosen profession?
- Can you call your school and student years the best time of your life?
Do you want to understand if he likes you?
What you should absolutely not tell a man
There are topics that should be avoided or ignored if a man himself wants to talk about it. Such conversations can provoke a conflict or be offensive for both the guy and the girl. You should avoid the following conversations on the phone:
- Past relationships. Love for another person is painful for both girls and boys, especially if they are very young. Such things are discussed after close communication has been established. But sometimes they don’t need to be discussed at all, especially if the man is very jealous or sentimental.
- Financial questions. They may be inappropriate and suggest bad thoughts. The conversation should be pleasant and not make you think about material problems.
- Family dramas. If there are any difficulties or troubles in the family, then it is better not to mention it until the woman manages to get closer to the man.
Holidays and travel
Traveling leaves behind very pleasant impressions. Don't miss the opportunity to share them with your interlocutor. Also ask him counter questions:
- Do you prefer to relax outdoors or at home?
- Have you been able to visit abroad?
- How do you feel about weekend trips?
- Did your parents send you to summer camps as a teenager?
- How do you prefer to spend your weekend?
- What unusual dishes have you tried while traveling?
- Do you usually bring a lot of souvenirs from your trips?
- Which country would you definitely like to visit?
- Do you prefer to travel alone or in a large group?
- What is your fondest travel memory?
Food
If you are looking for a topic for a light and casual conversation, then start a conversation about food. In this vein we can discuss:
- What's your favorite dish?
- Do you eat at home more often or in a cafe?
- What dish would you never eat?
- Do you cook well?
- Do you think a girl must know how to cook?
- Do you prefer simple food or gourmet dishes?
- Does your family have a tradition of preparing certain dishes for any holiday?
- What cafe would you recommend me to go to?
- Which nationality's cuisine do you find more attractive?
- What's your favorite thing to eat for breakfast?
Original ways to meet a guy HERE.
How to interest a man - psychological techniques
First, let's understand how a man's brain works, and how the gray matter determines the attractiveness of a woman.
It is important to know a few facts:
1) Interest, like falling in love, arises thanks to the right image in a man’s head. We fall in love not with a person, but with the image that we have drawn in our head.
2) You can draw an image in a man’s head that is beneficial to you.
To paint the right image of yourself in a man’s head, you need to figure out what will put you in a favorable light, and what, on the contrary, will kill your attractiveness.
Above you see my correspondence with a girl. After the compliment, she wrote a message that makes her look bad. The question immediately arises: “What exactly is wrong with her, since men are only interested in her because of her money?” She directed my thoughts in a way that was unfavorable for her!
We have already figured out what an incorrect image is in a man’s head, now let’s talk in more detail about the effective image that we must draw.
What makes up the image of an attractive woman?
1)Success with other men
If a man sees that other representatives of the stronger sex like you, then his instinct of competition turns on and you become more desirable to him. The second plus is that he begins to look at the positive aspects of you and looks for the answer to the question: “Why is she so popular among men?” His brain is already working in the direction you need, he is looking for an explanation for your attractiveness and will definitely find it.
2)Uniqueness
Your task is to make the man remember you, to find in you something that is not in other girls. You need to evoke his emotions. What causes emotions in people? - Some kind of non-standard situation, response, behavior, in general, everything that a person does not expect to hear, see, feel.
Even trivial questions can be given an unusual answer that a man never expects to hear. For example: What are your hobbies? — Three-dimensional variety of the homeomorphic sphere in higher algebra.
Vadim Kalantarov Blog author
If you are having difficulties in your relationship and need help, write me “+” in Instagram messages. I will assess your situation and suggest a possible solution to the problem.
Vadim Kalantarov Blog author
If you are having difficulties in your relationship and need help, write me “+” in Instagram messages. I will assess your situation and suggest a possible solution to the problem.
A man never expects to hear such an answer; imagine that he met three different girls, two of whom are interested in drawing and singing. And one of them is “The three-dimensional manifold of the homeomorphic sphere.” Who will he remember more?
Pets
Animals are part of our life. Even if you and your boyfriend don’t have pets, it’s always pleasant and fun to talk about our little brothers:
- Do you have a pet?
- Do you like watching funny videos on the Internet featuring animals?
- When you were a child, did you ask your parents for a pet as a gift?
- Are you afraid of dogs?
- How do you feel about the fact that some people keep exotic animals at home?
- Have any funny stories happened to your pet?
- Do you consider yourself a cat person or a dog person?
- If you had a dog, what would you name it?
- Would you like to have several pets at once? Or would one be enough for you?
- Do you like watching films with animals?
Choosing a topic for conversation
You can talk about anything. With one "but". It is necessary to take into account the degree of your acquaintance. If this is the first or third conversation on the phone, communication will be based on general questions. As they say, getting into the soul of a stranger is impolite and inappropriate. A man may perceive such directness as a threat to his personal boundaries, after which he will hasten to disappear. The stronger sex generally takes longer to open up than girls, so there’s clearly no need to rush here.
A closer acquaintance that lasted at least a month presupposes completely different communication.
What topics can you talk about to interest a guy, get closer to him and not seem intrusive:
- Common hobbies and hobbies - it will be nice if you have similar tastes and interests. A common cause can bring people together and unite them.
- Events of the past day (days) - what was new, what was remembered most, what pleased you, what upset you?
- Plans for the coming week - here you can cheat a little to arrange an unplanned meeting. After asking your interlocutor, pretend that some of your affairs coincide. For example, he shared that he was going to a concert. Feigning surprise and joy, say that you also wanted to attend this particular event and offer to go together.
- Cinema, music, other art. You can talk about the latest in cinema, favorite songs, musical groups, artists, bloggers, etc.
- Technology, gadgets - discuss the latest phones, cars, motorcycles, headphones, etc.
- Sport.
- Study, work - you can talk about your future profession or the specifics of your activity.
- Cooking preferences - what kind of food you both like, find common preferences.
- Achievements in anything - the main thing here is not to overdo it. If a man suddenly has nothing to brag about, and your whole life is “successful,” you can make him feel uncomfortable. The stronger sex is called strong because it claims superiority and leadership among women.
- Travel – Share impressions of places you've both been to and ideas about places you'd like to go.
- Pets – as a rule, every owner adores his pet. A story about a pet activates warm feelings, relieves stress and promotes a pleasant atmosphere.
You can carefully hint at a date. For example, say that you haven’t been to the cinema for a long time, and now a new film has just been released.
Say casually that you would like to drink a delicious milkshake or just get some fresh air. If a man is interested in you, he will quickly grab onto the proposed idea and invite you somewhere.
Achievements and victories
It’s always nice to talk about personal achievements, victories and successes. In addition, conversations on this topic will allow you to get to know the guy better:
- Have you managed to become the best in your educational or professional activities?
- Do you have any cups or medals for participating in sports competitions?
- What grade did you get for your thesis/course project?
- Did it take you a long time to get to your position?
- Do you want to continue growing your career?
- Could you speak in front of a large audience of people?
- Have you taken part in any creative competitions?
- Could you organize the event yourself?
- Is it important to you to be the best at work?
- Have you achieved everything you dreamed of?
Don't know what to write to him?
General rules
The reason for meeting a young man online can be a like on a photo, a nice comment, or a smiley face. If the guy answered them, you can write the first message. But we need to build the dialogue correctly. Follow the recommendations of experienced pickup artists:
- Be sure to greet the man. Make it casual and original. “Salute!”, Hi, I’ve never seen fish like those in your photo from the “Travel” album. Tell me.”
- Please wait for an answer. Let an hour or a day pass. If a man drags his feet with letters, also take a long pause.
- Ask what he does in life, what his interests are. Keep quiet about yourself for now, create intrigue. The guy will probably study your profile himself.
- Do not use complex, ornate syllables in your letters. Choose simple, easy vocabulary.
- Don't track your boyfriend's visits to the site. He may be in “Invisible” status and log into the messenger not only to communicate with you, but also with other users. Resentment due to silence at the initial stage of communication is inappropriate.
- Do not comment on all his posts, photos, videos. Assertive behavior will push a man away and he will feel an invasion of his personal space.
- Do not send pictures or videos in bulk. The male sex is annoyed by gifs and songs in personal messages. Although everyone has different tastes. If you feel that you can interest him in this way, use this method, just select photos and articles that will hook him.
- Think in advance about what to ask the guy in correspondence. Smart men ignore stupid questions. Study it, read the answers carefully, react to changes in tone and behavior.
- Act like a lady. Do not use slang, swear words, or vulgar jokes. Be careful with abbreviations and foreign words. “PZHL”, instead of please, computer, soap and so on make the speech rude, as if the dialogue is being conducted with a robot. Exude sensuality, emotion, tenderness.
Men love simplicity. They are attracted by easy communication, they feel that the woman wants to please. Keep it simple, don’t emphasize your superiority, then the guy will definitely want to continue communication at least at the level of friendship.
On a note! Before you interest a guy, get your profile in order. Upload a fresh photo, delete unnecessary friends, leave ambiguous groups dedicated to virtual, female pickup and others.
No pauses
Conversations sometimes reach a dead end. Interlocutors begin to get nervous due to boredom and awkward pauses. How to avoid this?
- Think through possible topics of conversation in advance.
- Have a few questions at your disposal that can help out in case of an awkward pause or in a situation where the conversation has gone in the wrong direction. Helpful topics include local news and events, new releases from the world of cinema and books, and popular TV shows.
- Don’t answer with a simple “yes” or “no.” Give detailed answers to the guy's questions.
- Try not to stress or get hung up on the process of conversation and thinking about every word. This distracts from the judge of the dialogue.
- Be curious, don't be shy to ask leading questions.
Attention! Don't take advice too literally. You shouldn’t chatter incessantly during a telephone conversation, not allowing your interlocutor to get a word in edgewise. Be not only an interesting conversationalist, but also a good listener.
How to melt permafrost in communication even with a completely wild man
But the cure is not that a woman constantly says something to a man. She talks to him, talks, talks, talks... But he doesn’t even hear anymore. Because at a certain moment the fuse trips. Well, when you are full of information: your tanks are full to capacity and nothing else enters your brain.
In order to be able to say something else to a person, his brain needs to be unloaded. So that he also expresses something to you. And not necessarily on the topic of your monologue. And in the beginning, perhaps, he will say not very pleasant things. He could already have a lot of things accumulated there, he’s been holding back everything for a long time and can tell you complete crap.
Let him speak out, let him learn to say something, let him realize that he can say something to his woman. And at a certain moment, after all these fireworks have passed, he may begin to say things that are really important to him - he will begin to open up gradually.
Gradually, seeing your attitude, your example, he will also begin to confirm the good points in you: what a craftsman you are, how creative you are, how talented you are in creating comfort at home, what an attractive, beautiful, sexy, stunning beauty you are.
What to do if you run out of topics?
If you run out of topics to talk about, it’s easy to revive the dialogue. Just use your imagination. How to do it?
- Look around. The world around us can present a lot of new topics for discussion.
- Talk to him about his hobbies. A passionate person can talk about this almost endlessly.
- Ask him to talk about his family (about relationships with parents, about brothers or sisters, about family traditions).
- Share your childhood memories with each other.
- Think together about unusual, mystical phenomena in life.
It might be useful: the ABCs of communication on dating sites.
Location, location, location
With every person in the room, you have at least something in common (no matter what): at least the event you both attended, the location where it is held, the food and drinks. Use these resources and start a conversation about the environment
5. If there is food at an event, I often use this to start a conversation, for example: “I can’t stop eating these cutlets. Have you tried it yet?
6. “How did you find out about this event?”
7. “It’s so hot (cold) in here.”
It doesn’t matter whether this is actually so, the interlocutor will either agree or object, and now you are talking about the weather, the climate in general, and then about business
8. “I’m a little dumbfounded by the flow of information that has been thrown at us today. Did anything stick out to you that really made sense?”
9. “What a wonderful place. Have you been here before?
Taboo topics with a man
You should not discuss a number of topics with a man. They can lead to quarrels, misunderstandings and broken relationships. What are these topics?
- The young man's former lovers and your former boyfriends.
- Bad habits (a man may perceive this as interference in his personal affairs).
- Religion, politics. You especially shouldn't bring up this topic if your views differ.
- Marriage, future children, family relationships, meeting parents. This kind of pressure will scare the guy away.
- Financial questions. If you start persistently asking what position he holds, how much he earns, what his parents do, whether he has a separate apartment and a car, then the guy will decide that you are only interested in his wallet.
- Attempts at control. You shouldn’t be obsessively interested in who called him, why he didn’t immediately answer your message, from whom he constantly receives SMS, where he is, etc.
- Negative reviews about his family, friends, loved ones. Even if these people are imperfect, they are dear to the guy. He can be seriously offended by insults addressed to them.
- Inappropriate comparisons like: “Are computer games more important to you than me?” or “Who’s better, me or your ex-girlfriend?”
- Ladies' topics, not interesting to male representatives. Leave them for communication with friends.
Attention! If you understand that the interlocutor is tired or is no longer interested in the conversation, then find a reason to say goodbye to him or offer to reschedule the conversation.
What is not worth talking about
There are taboo topics that are not customary to discuss not only when talking with a man on the phone or in a real meeting, but also with other people who are not your loved ones. There are only five of these, so it won’t be difficult to remember them:
- Religion is a very sensitive topic for communication, especially in light of recent events, when you can face real punishment for insulting the feelings of a believer. It may happen that your faith or disbelief will somehow contradict the religious beliefs of a man, which may be perceived with hostility by him.
- Statements about politics and its representatives - just like with religion - your political preferences may differ from the views of the interlocutor. A relationship can end before it really begins if, for example, the guy is an ardent supporter of a party that you personally do not favor.
- Vulgar address to the interlocutor, sarcasm, evil irony - this is how you can communicate only with those who know you well and understand your humor. Here it is worth mentioning swearing. In fact, swear words do not make any girl beautiful under any circumstances. When talking to someone you really like, strong words can do you a disservice. If a guy is well-bred and educated, then he definitely won’t want to deal with a rude person. Getting personal and insulting a young man speaks of the girl’s immaturity, inability to control her emotions, or banal uncouthness. Such behavior is unacceptable in society in general.
- Questions about a former passion can put a guy in an awkward position. Asking him to compare her and you is a very bad idea and can lead to conflict. Perhaps he has only good feelings for her and then it will become unpleasant for you to listen to her praises. And if he is filled with grievances, then mentioning past relationships will only stir up unhealed wounds. Negative emotions may be further associated with you, since you were the one who raised the topic.
- Finances and material wealth also cannot be a topic on which not very close people can communicate. By asking a guy about his wealth, you can create the impression of a calculating predator and thereby push him away. If a man likes you and wants a serious relationship with you, then questions about money may offend him.
If you decide to call him yourself, you need to come up with a topic for conversation in advance. Make it a rule that the pretext for calling should not be the message “I’m bored, talk to me.” Who would like to be a clown for sad Nesmeyana? On the other hand, there is no need to be zealous and literally bombard a man with a stream of information. Excessive sociability may be perceived by him as an obsession, from which anyone will want to escape.
A little psychology
How to understand that a guy likes you
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14 proven ways to get his attention
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How to start a conversation with a guy
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What attracts men to women?
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What else do you need to know about telephone conversations?
- When talking to a guy, speak in a confident voice, even if you are nervous.
- If you have important information for a guy, tell him right away.
- Is there a pause in the conversation? Don't worry. It’s better to remain silent once again than to say something stupid without thinking.
- There is no need to criticize his interests, hobbies and outlook on life. Even if you don’t agree with him, be able to express yourself correctly. Not “You don’t understand anything about this,” but “I think differently because...”.
- There is nothing wrong with calling the guy yourself and taking a step towards meeting him.
- Do not drag out the conversation for too long, otherwise the conversation will become tedious and routine.
About past relationships11
Some topics should be approached with caution. It’s worth catching the notes in a guy’s conversation in time in order to switch to a different direction.
Girls love to talk about sensitive topics. Relationship. Of course, a woman is interested in who the man dated or lived with, why the couple broke up, whether the ex is beautiful or not. If the emotional wound in a guy’s soul has subsided, he will easily and simply tell you the details of interest. Based on this, a girl can understand what a guy’s character is, his attitude towards the fair sex. Is he able to forgive and treat past passions with politeness?
If a guy enthusiastically lists the merits of his ex-girlfriend and goes into memories of their meetings and time together, it means she still owns his heart.
The same can be said about a young lady who causes strong anger and irritation in a man’s voice. She doesn’t seem to have done anything wrong, but he still hates the girl with fierce rage. He lists her shortcomings, the insults caused, the ugly actions on her part... The fire of passion for the girl from the past has not gone out in his heart.
A man may disapprove of such a topic, not wanting to remember old relationships. You shouldn’t insist on your own and it’s better to move the conversation to more interesting points.
Question answer
Why does a man often yawn when talking on the phone?
If a guy yawns often, this does not mean that he is bored with you. Yawning occurs for the following reasons:
- The man has just woken up.
- The guy most likely forgot to open the window; he lacks oxygen.
- He just got free or took a break after a long, monotonous job.
- He was just having a difficult day.
- He's too excited and focused.
Sometimes constant yawning indicates serious illness.
Why did the guy quickly end the conversation?
This situation can happen for various reasons:
- A man simply does not like to talk on the phone for a long time, preferring live communication.
- He had important things to do, and it became uncomfortable to talk.
- There are strangers or very curious relatives nearby.
- He simply said everything he had planned.
- The guy is not interested in conversation.
I don’t know what to talk about on the phone with a guy because I don’t know him well
Talking on the phone is a reason to get to know each other better. There are questions that will help you get to know your interlocutor:
- How do you like to spend your holidays?
- What are your priorities in life?
- What can instantly cheer you up?
- Do you have any hobbies or interests?
- What do you think money can’t buy?
Stupid maneuvers12
Girls often make terrible mistakes when talking to a man on a mobile phone. Such oversights can turn a guy away from a young lady. Don't do stupid things like this:
- Passing the phone to a friend, pranking a guy, speaking in a changed voice. The guy will think that his partner has not matured enough to have conversations and other relationships.
- Expressing complaints and grievances is the lot of a grumpy wife with ten years of marriage. The guy didn’t call on time, forgot to wish him a happy birthday, didn’t notice the romantic message - the young lady was pouting and desperately screaming into the phone. This behavior turns men off. Capricious princesses are good in moderation.
- The second option for an offended lady is to ignore the call. She won’t pick up the phone, and he will immediately guess what he was wrong about. It is not right. The guy will get excited, freak out, and eventually stop bothering the girl with his attention.