How does a man's love manifest itself? A man's view from a psychologist


In this article we will tell you:
  1. Psychology of a man's love for a woman
  2. Differences between a man's love and a woman's love
  3. What is the difference between love between M and F?
  4. Signs of male love
  5. How should a man love a woman so that she is sure that she is truly loved?

The love of a man for a woman is different from the love of a woman for a man. And every woman who strives to love and be loved needs to know what exactly male love is.

In the article we will talk about how a man’s love for a woman is manifested , how it works, and what its essence is.

We will rather talk not about love itself, but about male abilities, manifestations and characteristics.

Psychology of men in love

The most important question for women: can men love, the psychology of love. Let’s try to understand the main differences and find a way to understand the world of men’s feelings and emotions. Male psychology in love and relationships has special origins and manifestations. For men, the stages of developing a feeling of love have a different order.

<<Contents>>

What is love

This is one of the deepest feelings encountered in life. In the dictionary you can read that this is a heartfelt affection characterized by selflessness. And it can manifest itself both to children, a man, relatives, and to the homeland, profession, nature.

Truly loving is not given to everyone, because it is a gift from special people. Those who can boast of a rich inner world and wonderful character. People who are selfish, selfish and arrogant are simply not capable of real feelings towards others.

There is an opinion that external manifestations (attachment, attraction, passion, experiences) are only a reflection of what is happening in the soul. Love is not only feelings, but also behavior, an established way of life with certain values, worldview, focus, and even intonation and breathing.

In the article we will dwell in more detail on relationships with representatives of the opposite sex. And let’s look at the manifestations that are most often understood as true love.

The birth of male love

There is the following scheme for the origin of love:

  • a girl is attracted physically - beauty, gait, grace, emotional interest appears
  • intellectual attraction - the need to learn more about a potential lover (tastes, interests, hobbies)
  • spiritual attraction - feeling of a loved one, common interests, free communication

Thus, for the birth of love, relationships must go through certain stages, and the young man must get to know the girl well enough, then real feelings are possible, with the rapid development of events, only a short affair is possible, mutual interest will not develop to the level of love. For women, on the contrary, intelligence is first attracted , the spiritual side of the personality, and later a craving appears on the physical level.

Harmony is created by combining all points - friendly communication, intellectual, spiritual connection and physical attraction. As a result, stable relationships are formed, similar to the kinship of souls or the meeting of two halves.

However, without physical interest, a man cannot love a woman, only friendship. What about women? Everything may be developing, intellectual interest and intimacy can turn into physical interest. In the absence of one of the components in a relationship - harmony, a woman has a feeling of emptiness, dissatisfaction, a desire to get what she wants from other men: communication, support, understanding, attention.

Why do women complain that men don't know how to love? Perhaps it's all about a different approach to love. In a family, the stronger sex considers material support and fidelity to be the main ones. For him, this is a guarantee of a strong union and a manifestation of love, forgetting about spiritual intimacy, a woman’s need for communication, understanding, romance, and not just physical satisfaction.

How do close relationships develop, stages of relationship development:

  1. Attraction in men is physical, and in women it is intellectual.
  2. Uncertainty is a period of doubt, a temporary fading of a man’s interest, you shouldn’t rush it, you need to be patient, it’s a natural process.
  3. The desire to be the only one is a conscious choice; a person feels the desire to be with one woman, to continue the relationship.
  4. Mental closeness - complete trust is manifested in communication, a person is ready to open his soul and heart, there is no need to rush to reveal all the complexities of character, lovers perceive shortcomings more easily.
  5. Engagement is a stage when people are moving towards marriage, planning to live their lives together, but even here there is an opportunity to think through everything and decide whether they are ready to get married, the relationship can end or move on to the next stage of development.

Male psychology in love and relationships has a different development, an intelligent woman should understand: there is no need to rush to force events, go to persuasion, spiritual closeness must develop in order to form strong relationships, a family union in the future. The mistake men make is the desire for quick physical intimacy, girls take longer to fall in love, they need to go through all the stages, even if they meet you halfway, they will not be happy. Of course, men also know how to love, there are truly happy couples, which allows a woman to feel that she is loved and desired, the only one.

Reasons for gay orientation3

For many years, homosexual love was considered a mental disorder. While one man is groping another in a secluded corner, bright minds are making assumptions about why this fact is taking place:

  • Mental illness.
  • Esotericists suggest that the “lost” soul at conception ended up in the wrong body.
  • First sexual experience with someone of the same sex.
  • Saturation with sexual life, desire to experience new sensations.
  • Great disappointment in women.

The most important qualities of a man

  • Responsibility is the ability to be responsible for one’s actions, family, to be a reliable life partner, to fulfill promises and obligations.
  • Patience, calmness - patience, understanding - the keys that open any door, you need to learn to appreciate the important things in life and not lose your composure over trifles, even the loss of a fortune is not worth the loss of a loved one. Patience helps you gain the favor of your girlfriend.
  • Sensitivity - attention to the worries and sorrows of a loved one is very important in a relationship with a woman who lives in her own emotional world and needs support.
  • Confidence - the participation of a woman is useful for the development of this feeling; with constant doubts on her part, the partner loses confidence, and next to a calm, wise woman, he gains faith in his own strength.
  • Determination - having plans and aspirations in life are a sign of a strong man.

Determination in moving towards goals is fascinating and makes a strong impression. Purposefulness should be in conquering a woman throughout life, attentiveness and gallantry are always pleasant.

Male psychology in love differs, first of all, in that a man’s life is aimed at the outside world, and love is a break from work and the worries of life, for a woman it is life. A man’s love for a woman in psychology is considered as a desire to possess and a desire to protect the woman he loves, Therefore, the stronger sex likes feminine girls who give the impression of needing a strong man, but relationships with a business woman are more difficult to build, and competition arises.

Often women have a question: do men know how to truly love? It all depends on the person, his understanding of love, his ability to express feelings, often men tend to prove love through actions and deeds, beautiful words are often spoken by ladies' men, it is worth observing a person to understand the true attitude - does he show care, does he strive to help, provide support?

It happens that women have the feeling that real feelings are more a feminine manifestation, and the male half likes to conquer and possess, they ask: “why don’t men know how to love?” Perhaps such girls have not met true love, when a woman is a queen, worthy of respect, recognition and care. How to determine whether there is love on the part of a man?

Male psychology in love and relationships has the following features:

  1. The male half is characterized by restraint in expressing feelings; if a partner does not shower you with compliments, this is not yet an indicator of a lack of love, you need to look deeper.
  2. All men have their own tastes and preferences in love, there is no single ideal, for every girl there is a betrothed in this world
  3. Most representatives of the stronger sex tend to appreciate such qualities in the fair half - a kind attitude, femininity in behavior, sexuality, a positive character and flexibility in behavior.
  4. Enamored.
  5. What attracts women is confidence, tenderness, intelligence, beauty, and self-esteem.
  6. The male half of the young man is always looking for ways to be close to the girl he loves, strives for meetings, and spends time together.
  7. Silence is a manifestation of character and is not associated with feelings; men find it difficult to combine thinking and talking; sometimes they need to be alone and resolve current issues.
  8. The male half likes to conquer women, accessible women do not evoke sincere feelings, and often become victims of Don Juans.
  9. Men are attracted to mysterious women who have a special charm, can maintain intrigue all their lives and not be read as a book.
  10. Men love calm relationships without constant quarrels and reproaches, they prefer to clearly understand the expectations of their partner, it is better to speak directly about their wishes, not to expect that their loved one will read his thoughts, this is not typical for men. They also need support, and a girl who is able to believe in them will the best and most devoted friend in life.

Thus, to the question “can men love?” — there are different answer options, girls determine their opinion based on life experience. Having delved into the essence, we understand: often feelings are stored quite deeply, which is not always clear, but what about “I love you”... Yes, this is important for girls, but a young man will not do something for the unloved, sacrifice interests, find time , solve problems.

A man, relationships, psychology, expression of love are the most popular questions among girls and women. How often there is a lack of understanding in the psychology of men, and everything is perceived from a woman’s point of view.

In the modern world, women have become more active, they often make their own choices, attract men, but there is no need to force events, a young man should feel like a conqueror, and hints at a wedding ahead of time are an encroachment on freedom, men value it very much, it is better to gradually lead to the desired idea . For example, when a desire arises to live together.

Heal a wounded heart9

There is an opinion that most homosexuals in the past were ordinary guys who happily squeezed their classmates and ran after their skirts. Then a woman appeared in their lives - a predator, an evil bitch, who broke the fragile male soul and broke his fragile wounded heart. The couple was in strong conflict situations, falling into the trap of complete misunderstanding.

The partner brought pain and humiliation to a man of such a powerful character that she completely changed his character, worldview and orientation. The guy began to understand that it was more difficult to chase skirts than men's pants, and instead of girls, he began to pay attention to the stronger sex.

Male psychology in love and relationships

Why is it generally accepted that the male half tends to gravitate towards diversity, and in Muslim countries polygamy is even normal?

The reasons are as follows:

  1. Lack of love, monotony, boredom and formality of relationships . You cannot calm down and assume that the man belongs to you forever; this is possible with constant maintenance of the fire of love, respect, and support from your spouse.
  2. The complex of forty years - during this period the male population feels the advent of old age, there is a desire to prove their own worth as a man, the ability to attract girls, romances are possible, which leads to the breakdown of the family, although with harmonious relationships and love in the family this does not happen.
  3. Cheating, as revenge, occurs in situations of wife's betrayal, inattention, constant quarrels, lack of attention, lack of understanding in the family.
  4. Psychological compensation - career failures, a way to increase self-esteem and an endless search for a muse.
  5. Narcissistic men with high self-esteem tend to conquer women with high status, but quickly lose interest and again seek adventure, satisfying their interest.
  6. “Males” consider it normal to have affairs on the side; they perceive it as part of the life of a normal man, along with bars and drinking.

So, the psychology of men in love says: in a normal situation, if there is love and understanding in the family on all basic issues, there is no point in looking for other women, he is devoted to the only one.

And the question: “Do men know how to love and feel in general?” - rather rhetorical and depends on the woman and her inner mood, definitely - they know how, but they do not show feelings so clearly, but with the inner confidence that “there are goats all around” it is not surprising that such situations are often attracted to life. It is worth being attentive to thoughts and attitudes.

Scientific view of homosexuals4

Recently, society has been loyal to guys who kiss. What in the old days was called “the shame of the Lord” in modern times is allowed, approved, and, in some corners of the world, encouraged. Scientists are inclined to think that “homosexuality” is a genetic trait. There are several interesting versions that “explain” the factor in the appearance of “blueness” in the blood of a seemingly ordinary child:

  • A specific mutation in the X chromosome gives the heroes of Hollywood films unusual superpowers, when an ordinary “nerd” turns into the formidable Hulk or Superman. In real life, this chromosome transforms an ordinary man into a “cute girl”, not without balls and stiff stubble.
  • Scientists who have been observing pistils, stamens and bugs for a long time have discovered a funny thing: an infertile male is prone to distorted sexuality. The conclusion suggests itself: a man who is unable to produce offspring seeks solace in the strong embrace of a man.
  • An interesting legend came from midwives that a hormonal disorder during the second trimester of pregnancy has an impact on the sexual preferences of the future man.

Women's psychology in love and relationships

The psychology of women in love is significantly different from that of men; women are emotional, impressionable creatures, love is perceived in a more romantic light, and idealization of a loved one often arises.

How to determine the signs of a woman’s love, the psychology of love allows you to find the answer and better understand your loved one:

  1. A girl in love blossoms, becomes more beautiful - her eyes glow with happiness, she takes care of herself (makeup, hairstyle, outfit), love inspires and gives strength.
  2. Good mood, smiles more often, enjoys life, friends, especially a loved one - calls, messages.
  3. They strive to spend more time together, and most importantly, to communicate; women have a great need for communication, understanding, and getting to know a loved one.
  4. A girl in love always considers her beloved as a potential spouse, makes plans for the future, the main thing is not to rush to tell the young man about this.
  5. A woman is ready to help and support her beloved, sometimes even to the detriment of her own interests.
  6. Words say a lot about feelings - affectionate and gentle, radiating warmth and attention.

It’s hard not to notice that the girl is in love, remember “Office Romance”, the heroine has changed dramatically, she even became younger thanks to love, indeed, this feeling works wonders and has a beneficial effect on women.

Women's psychology in love and relationships is characterized by romance, especially in young years, every woman in her soul wants to find a prince, sometimes we search for a long time and do not always find it. It must be difficult to have high criteria. Therefore, among successful and beautiful girls there are lonely and unhappy ones - there are few strong and worthy men in life, and the fair half needs support and a strong shoulder. What girls value most in their stronger half is the desire to be sincere, devoted, reliable, to show responsibility, and to protect their beloved.

Women's psychology in love and relationships is associated with a high need to be heard, accepted, and understood. A woman is a mystery that can take a lifetime to solve.

However, men value, above all, the following qualities:

  • A sense of dignity - a woman is confident in herself and knows that she is worthy of attention; she has an internal system of values ​​and beliefs.
  • Insight and sensitivity - the ability to understand and feel another person, sometimes without words on an intuitive level, women are sorceresses, they have highly developed such abilities.
  • Favor is the ability to accept and give in return, a feeling of gratitude to a man for his help, his presence in life.

An interesting fact is that men do not like to save the unfortunate; they can help a self-sufficient girl become happier. Therefore, to attract attention, you need to be on top in all respects: external (look great, take care of beauty), internal (find happiness in your soul, believe in yourself).

Women are created for love, for admiration, why don’t everyone have relationships, and men have doubts: do women know how to love? There are often situations when a beautiful couple in love cannot live together for even a couple of years, the relationship collapses, feelings go away. Who is guilty? The reason should be sought in both partners.

The biggest mistake of women is increased sacrifice, they do not think about personal interests, take care of the family, losing their self, health, strength, the result is negativity towards others, reluctance to live together, or a man’s search for a more attractive companion.

The second situation is increased demands on a man, lack of needs for approval and recognition, a real woman knows that she is worthy of help and can calmly ask and communicate politely.

The main mistakes of men: they believe that finances and devotion are the basis of success, but they forget that a woman needs understanding, communication, approval, joint conversations, walks, time with the family. Often women suffer from a lack of attention, roses wither if they are not watered, and the fair half suffer from a lack of love and attention from a man.

Why women can't love after marriage

Of course, women know how to love, they change, feeling inattention, lack of opportunities for fulfillment in the family. By nature, the female half is created to receive, and if she has to give without reciprocity, the feelings go away. The question does not apply only to material goods, there is a need for respect, admiration, understanding, compliments (kind words), symbolic gifts.

The psychology of a woman in love is aimed more at the emotional sphere; we have a different language for expressing love. For example, a man needs intimacy, and a woman needs love and affection, a man needs recognition, a woman needs understanding, care. In difficult periods, a woman needs to speak out, and a man needs to be alone with his thoughts, to remain silent. All family difficulties arise due to a lack of understanding of the differences in the psychology of men and women.

Women's psychology in love differs in the need to combine incompatible concepts. The ideal man is “my affectionate and gentle beast.” A woman is attracted to physical strength combined with tenderness, care, and devotion. In life, this combination is extremely rare.

Women's psychology in love and relationships and men's psychology in love and relationships are completely different concepts. The only thing that can unite is the desire to be happy, to find the other half. Everyone wants to remain an individual, not to lose their Self, this is dangerous for both, with time comes disappointment, a desire to break free, to free ourselves.

There must be an element of freedom in a relationship:

  • opportunity to meet friends
  • have personal hobbies, interests

Then communication will be more interesting for partners, the exchange of ideas and impressions. Loyalty is an internal choice; it is impossible to force a person to be loyal.

People say: a stupid woman looks after her beloved, but a smart woman looks after herself (beauty, mood, words). These words contain the truth: the beauty of a woman and love for her contribute to a happy life together.

“Disease” of the modern world2

A society that condemns same-sex relationships expresses vehement condemnations and assumptions about the coming Apocalypse. Where have you seen a guy marry a guy? This fact is blamed on the lack of morals, perverted views on love and the rapid development of the 21st century, when humanity is trying to try everything: technology, gourmet dishes, the taste of freedom and other excesses. People seem to run one in front of the other, trying to surprise others, impress, and talk about themselves. As a result, they are inclined to do the most amazing things: conquer space, invent a truth serum, change their sexual orientation.

However, for a guy who loves a man, he doesn’t care about the opinions and condemnation of others. He feels good and calm with a loved one, and it doesn’t matter at all what gender he belongs to.

Always be feminine

Women's sophistication physically and psychologically always attracts men, so work on yourself. Be interested in different areas, develop your personality.

If you are involved in a scandal and want to use strong language, replace it with strict speech that does not contain profanity.

Take care of your natural beauty. Avoid wearing bright cosmetics and experimenting with hair coloring. Everything should be in moderation.

Be confident in your attractiveness and grace. A woman should exude sexuality, but not show it off.

The most stunning look is for him, not for a meeting of classmates

The syndrome of a victorious hunter losing interest in the game he has caught is no less common in women than in men. The fact that you got him into cohabitation or tied the knot does not mean that now he is forever in love with you. Yes, it’s vulgar, mean and banal, but about half of my male patients complained about facts of a girl’s neglect of her appearance after the relationship had become stable.

If he fell in love with a physicist with gray hair, a brown checkered vest and worn-out boots, he knew what he was getting into.

But since in your wedding photos you are a blonde in curls and roses, and now you are a cropped woman in a comfortable jumpsuit, then don’t blame me if they stop perceiving you as an attractive female. Moreover, when at corporate events you put on makeup and buy a new dress, and at home you walk around a la naturel in the same delicate pastel things (which the male eye perceives as faded and asexual). It's very simple, but women don't stop making this mistake. You are not obligated to be loved for who you are (moreover, you are not obligated to be loved a priori at all).

Talk about important things directly, without hints

Men understand hints, but more often these are hints from other men or those hints that are beneficial for them to understand. It is not customary for them (with the possible exception of the Japanese) to talk about the essence of the matter in Aesopian language.

When your husband wants to sell a batch of motorcycles to a client, he says: “We have a well-known brand, the warranty period is average in the market, and for wholesale we will discount you 7%,” and not: “The autumn leaf has withered on the lonely elm that grew on the sad hill , and it’s time to harness the iron horse to intelligent creatures and quickly run to the south from these places.”

Therefore, state it simply, but not globally, not “tell me straight, you stopped loving me, right?”, but “I’m tired of collecting your worms for ice fishing all over the house, this is not what my mother raised me for, hire a housekeeper.”

Is there a test: “Do I really love him?”

Very often a person has a need to understand whether his feelings are really real or are these just his fantasies that he has convinced himself of. First, it is important for a person to realize that doubts are normal. Secondly, there cannot be any serious test that answers this question, because everyone has their own understanding and their own boundaries of love.

Any relationship is a superimposition of certain ideas of two people about how, in their opinion, love communication should take place. The peculiarities of their personality give the feeling a special arrangement, so it would be correct to say: as many couples as there are, so many types of love. Which one is more perfect is not for us to judge. The main thing is that the feelings are conveyed to the person to whom they are directed. And this can only be done in his love language.

Nevertheless, on the Internet you can find many online tests designed for a young audience (students and schoolchildren) in order to, by calculating points when answering specific questions, make it possible to distinguish, first of all, falling in love from real feelings.

Focus of attention

What does it mean to truly love? Firstly, think not so much about yourself, but about how to warm your partner with a ray of heat. The focus is always on a loved one, about whom you want to take care and whose well-being comes first.

In a real feeling, the person himself seems to dissolve, he is not there, but in a selfish feeling, he is completely focused on himself and his experiences. What is love? This is the pronoun "we". Two people looking in the same direction rather than facing each other. They seem to identify themselves with each other, because each has become a part of the other.

According to the theory of E. Burns, three “I” live in each of us: an adult, a child and a parent. When the latter wins in us, our love turns into care. In the second case, it is a strong pull. But the love of an adult is filled with meaning. What is it about?

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