5 steps on how to leave your wife as painlessly as possible

If you are determined to break off your relationship with your spouse, you need to carefully consider how to do this as painlessly as possible for both of you. First, clearly formulate for yourself what reasons are really worth breaking up.

Next, make a plan on how to leave your wife and start a new life beautifully and with dignity, as well as how to behave in the future. From us you will receive recommendations on what mistakes to avoid, as well as valuable advice from experienced psychologists.

Take a candid look at the state of things.

Most likely, you miss your single life. You remember how cool it used to be to walk and not worry about anything. The thought that youth will return after a divorce pushes you towards it.

But let's be honest. With myself.

Admit it, while you are in the family, it seems that if your wife were not around, you would be wooing dozens of young ladies. You would be basking in female attention, and only a fucking ring would stop you.

But is it? It's easy to talk about seduction strategies when watching from the outside. Agree that you have long lost your grip, if you had it at all. And in reality, everything may not be as rosy as it seems. And you already left your wife.

Time will pass, you will try to communicate with women. And you realize that the girls have grown up a long time ago.

And you can’t get them with sweets/flowers, as it was during your youth.

The girls grew up and became smart, cunning and treacherous. They have already been traumatized by other men, and now they are not so gullible.

No matter how hard you try, you can’t just use girls anymore. They grew teeth, tails on their butts beaten by someone, and horns to boot.

If you are so very drawn to others, then it’s better to just try. Allow yourself to go and flirt with women. Try to seduce them, interest them. Remember the game of seduction by taste.

Perhaps you will be satisfied and can again enjoy one beloved wife. Or maybe you will finally understand that you like freedom more.

Why do husbands leave their wives?

Sexual attraction is far from the only reason why a man leaves a woman.

Many will probably say: “Because he is a male, and constantly needs “fresh meat!” Yes, this is a fairly common reason. However, I would not extol the male libido so much, because there are many other reasons.

Psychologists have identified the main ones:

1. Loss of trust.

   Yes, not only ladies can stop trusting their man, but vice versa. And if women have a huge number of reasons why they might lose trust in their loved one, then the stronger half of humanity has only one such reason - betrayal.

   How to survive your husband's betrayal: kill or forgive?

   To say that this is a “low blow” is to say nothing. This is trampled self-esteem, a feeling of uselessness, worthlessness and a host of other unpleasant emotions. In most cases, such men are not forgiven.

2. Sexual dissatisfaction.

   I hope you won't argue that sex is an important part of a relationship. If a man and a woman do not match in temperament and cannot satisfy each other’s sexual needs, they either live as neighbors or separate. Moreover, the second option is much more positive.

3. Tension in the family.

   Have you heard that a man cannot stand a woman’s tears? This is true. And at the same time, he also cannot stand hysterics, eternal complaints, discontent and humiliation. Therefore, if there are constant conflicts in the family that are not resolved, but only get worse, the man packs his suitcase. And this is completely natural.

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4. Lack of attention.

   I wouldn’t call men children, but they do have something in common. At least the need for attention. Yes, all people need it, but for men this desire is much more acute. When a man realizes that his woman is simply not interested in him, he “self-destructs” from this relationship.

5. Dissatisfaction with his wife's appearance.

   No matter how many people say that love does not depend on appearance, I will say: “It depends.” No wonder they say that a man loves with his eyes. Therefore, it is very important for a woman to be attractive and well-groomed. If she herself “forgets” about her appearance, the man follows her example and then leaves.

6. Lack of comfort and home warmth.

   We all understand that we are not talking about warm batteries. For any man, no matter how brutal and freedom-loving he may be, it is important to have a reliable and cozy rear. This is a home where it is always clean and smells nice, a hot delicious dinner, peace and comfort.

7. Tired of constant demands.

   This situation is somewhat different from the one when the wife makes scandals day and night. Here we are talking about those women who are accustomed to begging a man for everything: material goods, attention, love, tenderness, passion, understanding.

   They treat their partner as a bottomless well of financial and spiritual benefits. A man will very soon get tired of the constant “I want” his woman.

What to do if you are in doubt?

Situations are different. But it often happens that after a divorce, nothing really changes, except for the woman next to you.

If you are unsure whether to get a divorce, you can give your relationship a trial period.

For example, offer your wife to live separately for a couple of months. You kind of broke up, but not completely. Look at your life without a family and make sure that you are better off this way.

Or, on the contrary, you will begin to get bored and realize that it’s good at home. And you could make a mistake.

Your wife will also look at life without you and will slowly begin to get used to it. If you ultimately decide to leave, the adjustment period will help her accept the breakup more calmly.

If you decide to stay, you can reconsider your marriage and realize what problems you really have. And think about how to remove them.

I am sure that your wife also does not speak of you as an impeccable husband.

By trying to change and become better for each other, you will save the relationship and upgrade it.

Causes

How to leave your wife? Experts in the field of family relations say: the very first question that your woman will have is why. That's why you need to answer it for yourself. Situations can be very different, but it often turns out that essentially nothing will change, just the person who will be next to you will change. Is it worth leaving in such a situation? Of course, it's up to you to decide. You can hope that you will be better off in another place with another woman, but this hope is illusory and weak.

When exactly should you get a divorce?

It's really worth getting a divorce when you both are sure that it's the right thing to do. When you both want to break up and forget about each other.

It may also be that your wife will be shocked by your decision. But you have long ceased to be afraid of losing her and have no doubt that you want a free life. If you are firmly convinced, then her opinion no longer matters.

Then just go ahead and don’t look back.

If you are leaving because of a new young lady, then think about what exactly attracts you to her? And, most importantly, can you get this from your wife?

If this is beauty, a cheerful mood and a burning look, then, believe me, all this can be rekindled in your wife. The right approach, pleasant words and constant work on mistakes in the family will re-ignite your love.

“What didn’t suit you?”

Very often a woman asks her husband this question. That is why psychologists recommend preparing in advance and thinking through what you will say in response, so that the emotions that will certainly arise during the conversation do not prevent you from saying everything you want. Most often, this question is asked because of the feeling of hopelessness that appears in the heart of the woman you want to leave. This is why, when it comes to him, you should stop talking and walk away. Then there will be only emotions.

What is the right way to separate from your wife?

The woman who married you has every right to a calm and peaceful separation. And know why you decided to get a divorce.

Therefore, do it only in person. Leave all notes, messages or silent escapes from home to assholes.

Remember also that the most terrible behavior for a girl will be your hesitant tossing around.

The situation when a man leaves and then returns is the most stressful and painful for a woman.

Girls need certainty. If you decide to leave, then leave forever.

Step-by-step instructions on how to leave your wife

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What reaction from your wife should you be prepared for?

Women feel everything subtly and understand the emotions of others. It is likely that she has long suspected something was wrong and noticed changes in your behavior.

In this case, her reaction may be more or less calm. After all, if she still hasn’t raised this topic, it means she’s ready to break up.

In the second case, your decision will be a shock and a blow for her.

Family is the most important thing for a woman. This is what she lives for.

And the understanding that everything that has been done is crumbling greatly hurts any girl. Therefore, be prepared for tears, hysteria, and anger. This is an emotional outburst that will ultimately calm her down. And you can have a normal conversation.

Now you are the one who is ruining her life. And, most likely, divorce for her is not a new life, but the collapse of her entire life.

Safety precautions

Once you start a conversation, it is difficult to predict in advance how it will go and how it will end. You know your wife and you know what she is capable of. So consider:

• when will you talk? She should be calm and balanced at this moment;
• will you talk? A restaurant or any other public place is the most inappropriate place for this. The fewer witnesses there are, the better and simpler;
• where do you start? The first phrase is very important, it will let her know that the conversation is going to be serious; Don't start this conversation in the bedroom. No matter what happens to you, the bedroom is a place of relaxation and enjoyment;
• You shouldn’t talk in the kitchen either, especially if your wife is impulsive and abrupt. There are too many breakables;
• Are you ready right now to take a minimum of things with you and leave?
• It is you who should leave, because you are the initiator of the breakup. Even if you share this apartment during a divorce, you should still give her time to comprehend what is happening in silence.

When you start a conversation, control yourself and don't let your emotions get the better of you. Be prepared for the fact that she won't be able to handle hers. So no matter what she says, you:

• don't insult;
• do not mention her mother or any other relatives in the conversation, they have nothing to do with it;
• don't say what you didn't mean to say;
• do not give in to her emotions, most likely she wants to hurt you as much as possible;
• do not forget why you started the conversation, even if she presses for pity;
• speak now and only now, you should not return to this conversation in the future. So either say it now, or forget you were going to say it;
• stand your ground to the end, be consistent;
• Do not let go of your hands under any circumstances, you never know what she says out of emotion.

Of course, the separation process cannot be called painless, but you can make it less painful.

What should you do when separating from your wife?

Be sure to speak without witnesses. Choose a suitable time and place. Please note that your conversation may last for several hours.

The most important thing you have to do is convince your wife that everything will be fine .

Convey to her that she will be much better off without a husband who does not want to be her husband. Open up divorce to her as an opportunity to meet a truly loving and ideal man who will make her the happiest person in the world.

Make sure that the divorce does not cause any financial problems or conflicts with children.

You can promise financial support for the first time. The woman will feel much calmer this way.

If you have children, convince your wife that you will take care of them after the divorce.

You will no longer be a married couple, but you will forever remain the parents of your children.

Discuss how much time they will spend with you and how much time they will spend with her. Give guarantees of material and moral support in any situation.

In general, discourage your wife from all fears of a future life without a husband.

"We are too different"

Often this phrase becomes the cause of a breakup. He is a night owl, she is a lark, he loves French fries, and for her this is one of the main enemies of a slim figure. He wants to drink beer with friends in the evening or spend time in the garage, she drags him to the theater. They are too different! Psychologists recommend thinking about: have you always been different or have you only become so now? It is likely that before you thought about how to leave your wife, you tried to find compromises with each other, make concessions, and then this desire disappeared. Just because people are different is not a reason to end a relationship. Rather, it can be called a consequence of deep internal contradictions or accumulated fatigue. What to do in such a situation? Try to find the true cause of the problem. Only after this will you be able to decide whether there is any point in talking to your wife or not.

It always takes two to tango

Firstly, I sincerely advise all women not to use the word “divorce” as a means to threaten their husband in family conflicts or as a way to test their worth to a man. If at every quarrel you say “I’ll get a divorce” or pack your things and go to your mother, you are putting a certain program in a man’s head: “if she leaves me so easily, then I’m probably not very important and need her.” It is not surprising that one day you may hear “get a divorce” or never wait for your husband to come take you away from your mother.

Secondly, remember that tango always takes two people. Responsibility for problems in a couple lies with both participants. Of course, it’s easy to notice other people’s mistakes, but what can I say, we only notice them. But how to notice your own?

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Why does a man want to leave his family?

1. Rival. Having a third person in a marriage is like a litmus test for existing problems. And both spouses answer them. But in this case, the woman also has to face her husband’s betrayal. After all, feeling the problems, he could solve them in another way, without having a mistress. I think in this case, the only safe way to deal with cheating is to accept that it is a consequence of problems that you both have started, and not a sign that you are unwanted or unloved by your husband. Don’t take betrayal personally, but consider it... like a cobweb in the house - if you don’t clean it for a long time, the house will become overgrown with it. And again, it is useful to know that the triangle is always swayed by the figure that is not satisfied with the current state of affairs. If your husband’s mistress comes to you to sort things out, and not your husband, this means that the mistress wants change. The husband does not intend to leave the family. There is no need to play along with your mistress and start kicking your husband out.

2. The influence of significant loved ones. It is no secret that many, especially young spouses, live with someone’s parents. It is not necessary to live in the same territory often. Someone may be so attached to their mother that they discuss every micro nuance of the relationship with her. And this mother, sincerely loving her daughter or son, begins to give the best and wisest advice or “do good,” as we psychologists say. Very soon it turns out that three people participate in family life, only instead of the mistress, the mother of one of the spouses acts. Or dad. The one of the spouses who finds himself alone (minority) is forced either to enter into competition with such a significant loved one or simply wants to leave. You can save such a couple; often it’s enough just to separate, go to a rented apartment, room, hostel, and then it turns out that the contradictions in the relationship are not so strong if someone else doesn’t carefully add fuel to the fire.

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3. Prioritization. Many women throw themselves into motherhood, but forget to leave it after the three-year period required by nature. In this case, the family model looks like “mother + child,” and dad hangs around somewhere, simply ensuring the functioning of this couple. How then can a man not feel out of place?

Some women are immersed in their careers, but at home there is a husband, whom at least sometimes you need to ask “how are you?” and, most importantly, hear the answer.

4. Sexual manipulation. Someone uses sex as a tool to influence a man. Refuses sex if, in her opinion, the man behaves “badly.” So why be surprised if a man leaves for a woman for whom sex is pleasure, and not a way of blackmail.

5. Loss of sexual interest. I really love going to the circus; I often see mothers and children there. Young women, every second of whom is overweight. Very overweight - 10 or more kilograms. The children look 4, 5, or even 7 years old. You can gain weight during pregnancy and breastfeeding, but why can’t you get rid of it 7 years after giving birth? Does the husband like such a blurry 20 kilogram wife?

These are just a few of the mistakes we all make in relationships. Try to find and correct your mistakes. Maybe this will spur your partner to find and correct his own?

“Are you really leaving?”

Of course, it’s hard for your significant other to believe that this is really happening. And it’s even harder to accept all this. That is why after this question you should not try to explain something or talk about something. Yes, you're leaving. Yes, this decision was not easy for you, but you made it. Yes, you're leaving right now. Immediately after these words, you must take everything you need (you will take the rest of the things later) and leave. Let your wife think about what she heard, draw conclusions, and comprehend what happened. Do not write or call, even if you are worried. After all, if you were sincerely worried, you would hardly leave. Don't confuse anxiety with guilt.

Experiments in bed

So I started conducting experiments.
At first he approached one lady, she did not reject him. Then to another - success there too. Further more. After forty years, as the client says, he realized that life was just beginning. So he got carried away! Almost every month he began to have women with whom he experimented in love. “We tried everything,” the man laughs. “But it was all complete nonsense.” Not a single nymphet touched the strings of my soul. He cheated on his wife, but he had no intention of leaving. And so it was until I met Her - the dream of my life, Lyubasha. Oh, and she was good! Stately, beautiful, prominent! The men fell in stacks as soon as they saw her. But she gave me preference. Well, things started to get serious for us. I don’t even want to leave home from her anymore, I gave up on my wife and children, I decided – whatever will happen. So he left his wife, he also left his children, they were not small at that time, they were finishing school.”

In what cases is it worth saving the family?

It seems to me that in the case when one of the partners does not have such a desire and he firmly wants to leave, it is pointless to keep him. It’s easier to let go and work with a second partner specifically to let go and support in a new situation. After all, any end is always a beginning. New events, new meetings, new relationships.

If the family has potential, both of them quarrel, even fight, but want to maintain the relationship, we need to deal with what led the marriage to a critical point. The woman is responsible for relationships within the family - for their emotional background, character, quality. A man is responsible for external relations, for relationships with the outside world. Therefore, a woman has to take on the role of peacemaker. So, initiate a visit to a psychologist. But what else can you do to save your relationship?

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