What is fear of success, how not to be afraid of change, how to change your life

April 01, 2021

Changes in a person's life are turning points that change one's relationship with the world. Often they cannot be undone back or the decision made several times.

Change is the path to change, improvement of internal state, which is based on past experience.

Fear is a source of consumption of vital energy, the purpose of which is self-preservation.

In psychology, fear of change is called neophobia . Its goal is to protect a person from the negative influence of the outside world. It's like a self-preservation instinct. People who are morally unstable and have low self-esteem experience fear of change.

Fear of the unknown paralyzes a person and prevents personal development. It becomes the reason for development in friendly and loving relationships, success in business.

Fear of the unknown causes disturbances in the body (increased heart rate, increased blood pressure, dizziness, increased sweating) and violates the psychological comfort of the individual. These people are afraid of any innovations in any area of life. This fear does not allow the individual to develop and feel the joy of life.

There are several types of fear of new things:

Fear of new technologies (technophobia);
Fear of new information (gnosiophobia);
Fear of the future (futurophobia);
Fear of eating new foods (neophobia).

It happens that employees who have been performing their duties according to instructions for a long time are afraid to change their work routine (conclude a new contract, change the algorithm of duties).

Fear of the new is a mental disorder; it prevents an individual from achieving results and leading a healthy life full of discoveries. For individuals who are afraid of everything, life is gray and the same. They are sad, anxious, restless. These people have stopped developing their personality because of their fears; they consciously do not want to develop, do not want to transform their lives, make it better, richer and more interesting.

You are late

Here is my own experience.
It was Monday, 07.27 am. I sat in my office and tried to write a new book, but a voice rang in my head, repeating in different ways: You are behind.

You will never move forward.

If you moved forward, you could rest.

It is too late.

If you had more time, you would have finished everything.

Like most of the voices I struggle with, this one was already familiar to me. But that morning for the first time I doubted its veracity.

Instead of engaging in dialogue with him, I started writing down what each thought actually meant:

“You're behind” Behind what? On what schedule? By what criteria? What does this even mean? I don't work on a meter. The work hasn't even started yet. I'm not running a race, I'm not competing with anyone. Who am I behind?
“You will never move forward” Where is forward? Who defines what “forward” means? I even suspect that there is no “forward”.
“If you moved forward, you could rest.” Rest is a gift, not a reward. These are not hobbies that lazy people use as an excuse, but one of our biological characteristics. Rest is a need for the body, and I don’t need to earn it with my results. Rest is not a byproduct of my success, but part of my human nature. I don't need to get ahead to enjoy or need rest.
“It’s too late” Nonsense. It's Monday, 07.27 am. How can it be “late” this week? There's still a whole carload of time. I reject the idea that “too late” is already when I wake up on Monday morning.
“If you had more time, you would have finished everything” Nonsense. What is "everything"? And why even set the goal of “finishing”? When you find something you love, you don't want to end it. You want to do it every day. And to finish means to put an end to it.

I wrote all this down, and it began to dawn on me how absurd fear's view of time is. The absurd thing is that fear tries to instill in you two opposing thoughts about time: “Do it later” or “It’s too late.”

The first thought makes you procrastinate out of laziness. The second destroys you, making you feel regret. And both of them are lies.

If you're alive, it's not too late. Don't trust the calendar that feeds you fear and doubt. This calendar never has a “today” page. The calendar of fear and doubt always begins with yesterday or tomorrow.

But you have today, and that's all you need to get started.

The rest will appear as we go.

Causes of neophobia:

External factors: anyone who follows the news knows that the media deliberately present negative events, having a bad influence on a person’s consciousness. People are becoming unsure of the future, afraid of any nanotechnologies and innovations, biopassports and biometrics, vaccinations and chipping, everything that they don’t even want to learn about. Fearing changes, people do not start families for a long time, do not give birth to children, are afraid of promotions with increased responsibility, are afraid to change housing or work.

Internal reasons: based on personal qualities and characteristics of the human psyche. Fears can develop due to a destructive life story, an unsuccessful negative experience from the past, or psychological trauma that a person received in early childhood. These are the people who

-cowardly;

- indecisive;

- unsure;

-They have low self-esteem;

- do not want to violate the comfort zone;

- have a high level of anxiety.

Fear of change and decision making

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Reading time 15 minutes

We are afraid of change because there are too many unknowns and it is almost always unclear what exactly they will lead to.
But even when we know what steps, when and in what sequence we need to complete in order to get exactly what we need, we stagnate for a long time in indecision, endlessly argue, miss opportunities and chances and sigh with relief: “ Well, apparently, not this time” or “What can I do?
- it's not meant to be" .

Changes can be spontaneous (fires, floods, tornadoes)
and
planned (graduation from a university, change of leadership, layoffs, relocation)
.
They can occur on our initiative (we decided to change jobs)
or
independently of us (we were fired or laid off)
.
Some we can influence
and control
(we started repairs, purchased materials, selected workers, control the process, give feedback and influence the course of changes)
, others
are beyond our control (we sent a request to some service and are waiting for a response, while There is no way we can speed up the process, influence the decision, etc.)
.

Whether we like it or not, changes occur continuously, both around us (weather, nature, the lives of other people, etc.)
and inside us
(the blood is enriched with oxygen, the body grows, some cells die, and new cells come to replace them). new)
.
The only question we need to answer for ourselves is: “Do we want to manage the changes in our lives or are we ready to let it take its course and deal with whatever the wave washes ashore?” In other words
, are you ready for more planned, initiated and controlled changes in your life?

We are less afraid of random changes that do not depend on us than those that we can initiate ourselves and whose development we can control.

When we embark on the path of self-love, the first thing that needs to be done is to take control of life, which means that we begin to manage changes as well (those that, indeed, can be controlled). We determine our vector of movement ourselves, and do not wait for a person or circumstances to push us in any direction, because it may not be on our way.

A person is more likely to take action not when something good “looms” ahead, but when things have become unbearably bad here and now.

Controlled change always involves the need to make decisions. Decision making always comes with responsibility. The ability to take responsibility for the results of one’s actions and inactions is a sign of a mature personality.

It is easier for us to get used to difficult living and working conditions, to destructive relationships, than to try to change anything on our own.

In fact, in dealing with the consequences of the changes that come into our lives uncontrollably, we often spend as much, or even more, energy, time, money and other resources than if we followed the path of independent decisions. But prejudices, apprehensions and fears cloud our minds, making white black and black white.

When trying to change our lives, we are afraid of:

that it will be worse than it was
that we will not be able to cope with the consequences
fail to cope with the upcoming trials
that it won’t work or the result will be disappointing

It will be worse than it was

There are not many drastic changes happening in our lives. The kind when a bulldozer arrives, levels everything to the ground, and the need arises to build something anew. In such situations, yes, for some time it may be worse than it was before, simply because all the bases and foundations have been destroyed. A new foundation is being laid, and this is always a labor-intensive and responsible process. But then, when you have a solid and reliable base, it will be much easier for you to build everything else. Looking back, you will understand that it was hard for you, but in the end it was better than it was. This is the first point
.

Second point

: good and bad are not static. If it suddenly gets worse, you can use your new ideas, decisions, and actions to make it better in the future. In any case, it is unlikely that you make vital decisions by tossing a coin. Most likely, you are planning, making forecasts, exploring various options. This means, even if not with 100% accuracy, you can still calculate the most likely outcome. But again, it is worth remembering that sometimes the deterioration of the situation is an intermediate stage on the path to its improvement.

I won't be able to cope with the consequences

We are afraid that we will not have enough intelligence, strength, time, connections - any resources to cope with the consequences (especially negative ones). Fortunately, not all changes happen instantly—many require considerable time and several stages. As a rule, passing one stage is a preparation for passing subsequent ones. It is very important to stay in the thick of things and be well informed. It is unlikely that you are a pioneer - most likely, there are already people who have gone through something similar and have shared their experiences in books, films, articles, blogs - collect as much information as possible. Often, it is ignorance and misconceptions about the issue, expressed by someone in passing, that instill doubts and fears in us. Also, don’t be afraid to ask for help from those around you and admit that you are not omnipotent and there are some things you can’t handle alone. It is joint work, achievements, overcoming difficulties that unites people and makes them something more than just individuals coexisting nearby.

What exact consequences are we afraid of?

Fear of consequences is actually not that simple.
It is not something specific, but always includes one or a whole set of basic human fears. Basic human fears:

death,
illness (suffering, loss of legal capacity, complete or partial),
rejection, condemnation, censure, non-acceptance (by society, loved ones and significant others),
loss of personality and self-control (as a result of mental disorders and illnesses)
loss of self-respect, prestige, dignity (as a result of deliberate actions on the part of other people (slander, conspiracy, etc.); violent acts in prison and other closed groups; as a result of bankruptcy, poverty; as a result of committing illegal actions that became known to the public).

Simply put, when we are afraid to change anything in our lives, we are afraid of what these changes may lead to:

to death (ours or someone else's).
to illness and disability - and this means physical suffering, a feeling of helplessness; loss of control over life, becoming dependent on decisions made by other people. Wasting money on treatment and possibly losing a source of income.
to a mistake, because of which society and all those who are dear to us will abandon us. Fear of total loneliness.
to loss of personality and self-control. This fear is associated with the fear of developing mental illness. When, in essence, our life ceases to belong to us. The personality that was no longer exists, which is tantamount to death.
to loss of self-respect, dignity and prestige. It is often associated with dismissal from high positions and positions, with high-profile scandals with famous and high-ranking people, with bankruptcy, ruin, and going to prison. Loss of dignity and self-respect as a result of violent actions, when there is no opportunity to defend oneself and defend oneself.

Any of these fears must be analyzed and considered separately, in each specific case, but I will express some general thoughts about them.
Firstly

, as you know from children's fairy tales, “fear has big eyes.”
Quite often we are afraid of consequences that may arise with minimal probability. Example:
A girl is afraid to fail the entrance exams to the Institute, because 1) her family and friends will judge her, everyone will turn away from her, she will be left alone without support and help; 2) she will lose self-respect and some weight in the eyes of friends, peers, and relatives. Life would end there, she would never be able to succeed in anything again. We are with you. Already as adults, we understand the absurdity and ridiculousness of these fears, but once upon a time, they literally paralyzed us.

Secondly

, it seems to us that any of the described outcomes leads to the fact that life ends and nothing can be changed, although in fact, there is only one such outcome - death itself. And we also often tend to exaggerate the likelihood of its occurrence as a result of certain changes in life:

If he doesn't love me, I'll die.
If I don't get this position, I'm done.
If I get fired from my job, I'll die of hunger.

Thirdly
, you can live with any outcome, except personal death. Build your life anew, look for support within yourself, in the people around you, get up and move on. Even the loss of personality and self-control is not a guarantee that a person will become unhappy. Yes, he will no longer be the same person he was before, but he will be someone new, and perhaps even happier, who knows? Many mental illnesses do not involve feelings of guilt, remorse and shame, which deprive many of us of peace and joy.

Fourth

, do not forget about the positive side of the matter, the very one for which you are starting changes.
Remind yourself often why you are doing this. As the philosopher Nietzsche said: “When there is something for the sake of it, almost any “how” can be endured
.

I can't cope with the upcoming tests

Svetlana K.: “ There are no jobs in my specialty in my city. You have to earn extra money here and there for pennies. I feel unfulfilled, but when I imagine how many difficulties are associated with moving to the regional center, it gives me chills. This includes housing, registration, and somehow the children need to be placed in school. I can’t even fit it all in my head. I'm afraid I can't handle it." Victor D.: “I would buy a car. I have to go to work by minibus, metro and bus. 3 transfers! But you’ll get these damn licenses: find a school, go to classes. But I have no time. And then try to pass the exams. And if you pass it, it’s every year for maintenance and insurance. And where should it be stored? Everything is always parked under the windows; parking near the house is paid. What if, God forbid, I get into an accident! This is so much trouble, all these authorities, the traffic police - a complete hassle. It’s easier with transfers: you pay, you sit down, you go, you don’t think about anything.” Sergey P.: “Of course, I have a dream - to open a cafe-bar.
I would stand behind the bar myself, chatting with guests, making cocktails. I even saved money for this business for some time. In general, this is enough to get started. But who needs another cafe in our city? Look, they are closing one by one. And all this accounting, inspectors, inspections will strangle the business in the bud.” I think from these examples you can understand what the fear of “not coping” is. As a rule, it is due to the fact that:

people are poorly informed;
they come up with problems out of the blue; Instead of looking for additional opportunities, they look for reasons why “no”;
they try to deal with everything at once (even with those obstacles that do not yet exist, but “may” appear) instead of acting in stages and step by step.

But the fact remains that while some are afraid, others are moving not only to other cities, but even to other continents in an unfamiliar cultural environment, without knowing the language, and with the whole family. They buy cars, or even 2-3 of them. Cafes, restaurants and entire recreation centers are opening.

It won’t work or the result will be disappointing

What will happen if I start, but I don’t succeed?
They will laugh at me. I will be considered a failure. They will stop respecting me. I will disgrace my family (parents, teacher, mentor, etc. For example

, the family has been trying to buy a house by the sea for several years, they told their friends and acquaintances about it, they are already dreaming of coming to visit to have a great time, and at the very last moment the deal falls through - the seller leaves without explanation. They are ashamed, painful and unpleasant to talk about it, therefore, as a result of some not entirely conscious actions, they lose their previous circle of friends, close themselves off and do not make contact.

Another example: “What if I invest money in building a house, and the developer goes bankrupt?”

Such doubts: it will work, it won’t work, I will be disappointed, I will not be disappointed - these are peculiar attempts to look into the future. And they can completely kill any motivation in the present.

If your idea, goal, task is dear to you, then do not waste time and energy on doubts - go forward and deal with the facts, and not with the far-fetched obstacles in your head. Also, do not forget that the result may exceed all your expectations.

Yes, we are all afraid of change. We are all afraid of responsibility. But look around - many people cope with their fears every day and move forward towards their dreams and goals. Because their desire to be happy, successful, prosperous and wealthy is stronger than their fears. They believe in themselves and trust themselves. Do you really think that if you stay in your run-down town, where you and your children have no future except to give birth at 18 and become an alcoholic or end up in prison by 30, then you will have less responsibility towards yourself and your children? and society than if you pull yourself together and move to another city? Remember

While we are afraid of changes, they happen, but unfortunately, without our knowledge. And if you are faced with a choice: to deal with the consequences of random events or to manage your life?, then know that in a long-distance game it is more profitable to choose the latter.

That's all I have for today.
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Learn to focus on the present moment of your life

Repeatedly replaying events from the past in our heads, as well as dreams about the future, deprive us of the opportunity to live in the present moment and adequately assess current events. This is often the reason for self-doubt and, as a result, fear of change. Learn to feel yourself online. Don't think about what happened and what will happen, collect your thoughts and start living now. One of the most accessible ways to learn to concentrate on the present moment is to include sports in your life. Moreover, do not choose activities with repetitive movements such as running or swimming, during which you can easily become lost in thought. Give preference to what requires constant monitoring of your actions. For example, dynamic yoga, dancing, Thai boxing. Such activities will teach you not to be distracted by your “mental mixer” in your head, but to concentrate on the present moment. A useful skill that you can transfer into your everyday life.

We are waiting for changes…?

A person, starting from birth, is open to everything new, and it is thanks to this that his knowledge of the world, learning and development occur. The child is open to new experiences every day. He wakes up in the morning, charged with searching for adventures, joyfully joining in the game with the world around him; he is not afraid of knocked-out knees and bumps. The child grows, and his information baggage received from the outside world becomes larger. Now he is already a teenager with the philosophy “everything in life needs to be tried,” and he tries, tries, gets impressions, gains some “bumps” and tries again. Thus, as we grow up, we no longer carry within us only the joy of new discoveries and impressions, but also a lot of other sensations absorbed with them, not always positive - such as fears or uncertainty.

The need for knowledge and new experiences gradually becomes less significant and is overshadowed by others, no less important - positioning oneself in society, creating a family, professional fulfillment. A certain way of life develops, it is warm, comfortable and cozy. Everything is clear and simple, you don’t need to strain yourself, you can just calmly go with the flow. And as a result, over the years, we have a kind of “cocoon” of a perhaps boring but stable job, family, usual leisure time and a lot of established customs. Stability seems to be a symbol of success; any attack on it causes, at a minimum, panic and resistance. Getting over these feelings is not always easy; not everyone is ready for a new turn in life. Many would rather give up tempting new prospects or experiences than allow themselves to lose that very sense of peace and comfort, while avoiding both potential failures and possible successes.

What attitudes underlie fear of success?

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“If I make a serious mistake, I’ll be a failure.” The athlete from the first example imagines that if he becomes more successful, he will then have no room for error, because he can become a failure in his own or others’ eyes. Therefore, he avoids success and postpones active action.

“If I become famous, negativity will fall on me, which I may not be able to cope with!” A businessman does not expand his business, because greater fame will bring into his life those who will react negatively to his activities. He is afraid of negativity, tries to avoid conflicts, because he does not believe in himself.

“I am not capable enough to cope with the serious problems of life.” The manager does not move to a more profitable position - he doubts that he will cope with the new challenges of work.

The most profound work on any fears occurs at the level of working with attitudes: CBT psychotherapy offers different techniques on how to change attitudes. High-quality work is carried out together with a therapist, but there are ways that help you work through fears of success on your own.

Act immediately, don't wait for the best moment

Do you want something? Don't wait for a better moment, it will never come. Fear of change should not be an obstacle to action. Do you feel motivated to achieve something? As long as the desire for change burns in your soul, it will overcome any fear. Therefore, think about a plan of action and follow it. You don't have to wait until Monday, and often you don't even have to wait until the next morning to start doing something. Always keep a good phrase in mind: people make it their life's dream to achieve something that can be achieved with just a week of hard work.

Change your life gradually

When life changes, you need stability in at least one of the current areas. You don't need to change your whole life at once. Do you want radical change? Start with one thing. Fear of change in life is quite natural. And in order not to drive yourself into stress, you should take a reasonable approach to the changes you make in your everyday life. Do you want to change jobs, move and find the love of your life? Start with one thing. Set your priorities and understand what is more important to you now. It makes the most sense to first change jobs, and then, when your financial situation is stable, look for new housing. When your current affairs improve, you can think about your life partner. There is no need to rush into the embrasure and radically change your existence. This behavior is fraught with stress, and as a result, depression will not be long in coming. Small changes will help you gradually change your usual way of things.

What should a person do who moves to another city and is forced to look for a job, housing and friends? He still has relatives and family in his hometown. Keep in touch with loved ones. Stable and familiar relationships will help you receive support and approval from people important to you. Communicate with your relatives more often and do not lose optimism.

Where does fear come from?

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A 1972 study (Horner, 1972) found that women were more likely to fear success. But in 1975 (Wheeler, 1975) researchers confirmed that men and women are equally susceptible to this phenomenon. Fear leads to feelings of anxiety, guilt and shame, a feeling of unfulfillment and criticism from loved ones who do not always understand.

It is better to look at such fears, anxieties, and phobias from the perspective of cognitive behavioral psychotherapy. Today this is the most scientifically based method of psychotherapy. For example, insurance companies abroad allocate funds for this particular method in order to help people as quickly and efficiently as possible, guided by research results.

Cognitive behavioral therapy states that our emotions and sensations are the result of a person’s perception of a specific situation. Let's take the example of two friends who were bitten by a dog as children. On a walk, seeing the same big dog, one friend will experience joy and tenderness, while the other will experience fear and a desire to avoid it. The reason is the different settings of each of them.

Consistently plan for change

First, you need to decide whether you are ready to act. If it is not there, then the planning process most often comes down to unproductive fantasy, which replaces the person’s need for change. Unwillingness to act can manifest itself in the form of procrastination and the expectation that the situation will change on its own, without our participation. We often mistake our unwillingness to move for laziness and scold ourselves, considering it a weakness. Admitting weaknesses in yourself is a difficult and courageous task, and if you do it without self-blame and self-flagellation, it becomes easier, and self-flagellation often increases procrastination.

Second, break down a large task into small daily steps. The following self-exploration questions will help you: “Am my plans helping me?”, “Am I following through on them?”, “How do I feel when I imagine myself in a new job/profession? Why do I feel this way?”, “What am I ready for in reality?”, “What can I do now?”

Don't tolerate things that cause you discomfort.

Fear of change often forces us to put up with uncomfortable conditions. The main fear is that it will suddenly get even worse. For this reason, people work for years in a job they don’t like, live with tyrants or in a place that is uncomfortable for them. Remember that a chronic stressful state negatively affects not only your mood, but also your health, provoking many serious diseases. If you're not ready to make a big decision, take a break. For example, take a vacation from a job you don’t like and try to work somewhere else during this time. Go on vacation with a friend or on your own to understand how much you need to stay in a relationship with a person with whom you are uncomfortable. Rent another place and live in it for at least a week to decide whether the problem is really in the wrong place. Such a time-out from the source of discomfort will allow you to look at the situation from the outside, weigh the pros and cons, and, perhaps, make a decision for yourself.

Overcome childhood fears

Why do some people constantly mark time in one place? Children's fears and complexes imposed by parents prevent people from moving forward. Why are some people constantly haunted by the fear of changes in life? Psychologists say that we need to reconsider our attitude towards this world. Childhood fears imposed by your parents prevent you from moving on. Take time to work through your inner state. Sit down and think about what complexes your parents imposed on you. Are you afraid to communicate with people? Are you afraid of becoming successful or do you think that you are a failure? Is this so? No. You have achieved a lot in life. Write down on a piece of paper all your successes that you have achieved. After reading the impressive list, you will realize that you have already learned a lot, and a bright future is just around the corner. You just need to get rid of the internal frames. It is advisable to say goodbye to them forever. Do you consider yourself a failure? Day after day, instill in yourself the idea that you are a successful person with a strong inner core. You will be able to achieve everything you want. Self-hypnosis works wonders. Change your negative thoughts to positive ones and you will see how your life changes for the better.

The perfectionist in my head

Fear and doubt are contradictory. They love to put forward arguments in favor of both points of view so that you seem to have nothing to argue with. They like to say, “You will never be able to do this” and “You have to do it perfectly.”

The first statement implies that none of the parts of your dream will succeed; the second is that each of the components of your dream must become successful. It doesn't make any sense at all, but you hear both of these voices.

They are quite easy to refute. The truth is that from time immemorial there has not been a single situation in which fear predicted success.

If you ask fear whether you can do something, the answer will always be “no.” So, fear would definitely tell Steve Jobs that people hate touch screens.

Never ask fear for advice. You already know his answer. Just follow your path.

Remember that it is never too late to change something in your life

Sometimes we block desired changes in our lives because we are sure that it is too late to change anything. This is especially true for unfulfilled desires. But in fact, it's never too late to change something in your life. Since childhood we dreamed of becoming a ballerina and performing on stage in a white tutu and pointe shoes - go ahead. Even at 60 years old, no one is stopping you from enrolling in body ballet courses and getting up to the barre. Who knows, maybe your desire will be so great that in a year you will take part in an amateur performance and dance on stage. There are plenty of examples in history when a person radically changed his life, even if everyone around him was sure that it was too late. Remember: it's never too late!

Articulate your own value

If identity is built around the old profession, then after changing it a person is afraid of losing himself. The following questions will help here: “Who am I?”, “What am I?”, “Why do I value myself?”, “Why do others value me?”, “What do they ask me for?”

In different states, people tend to give different answers to these questions. For example, it is more difficult for a tired and depressed person to give himself a more sound critical assessment. So try asking yourself these questions in different states over a period of time - for example, every day for a couple of weeks. And collect at least ten answers for each.

Get out of your comfort zone more often

Who is haunted by the fear of new things? People who rarely leave their comfort zone are afraid of change. You need to make a rule for yourself: every week, do something that you are afraid to do. For example, if you don’t know how and don’t like to communicate with people, go to a club or any social event. Make new acquaintances at the party and try to open up to a stranger. Such experience will be very valuable. You will understand that there is nothing wrong with approaching a person and getting to know him. It will be scary at first, but once you talk to strangers and realize that they are nice people, you will be able to easily find a common language with anyone.

If you are haunted by a fear of change, then try doing crazy things. For example, jump with a parachute. It's not as scary as it seems. Choose a good flying club and sign up for a consultation with an experienced instructor. By overcoming fear, you can feel more confident and understand that if you were able to decide on such a crazy act, then you can easily cope with any other task.

How does fear of success manifest itself?

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you do not act in the right direction or do it passively;
spend a lot of time on Instagram, VK, Facebook;
you constantly feel procrastination and laziness;
you make plans for the day/week/month/year, but don’t follow through;
you don’t finish what you start: you have a lot of work “tails” behind you, you work on several projects, but not very effectively;
even New Year's resolutions contain the same points: join the gym, learn Spanish, go dancing, visit a new country, get a dream job;
you often engage in self-criticism, feel guilty, ashamed;
feel guilty for any, even the smallest achievements, if friends, relatives or colleagues have not achieved the same;
You don’t tell anyone about your successes and are even embarrassed about it.

Start changing your life with the interior

Big changes often start small. Do you want something new in life? Get rid of old and unnecessary interior items, associating each of them with a stage or event in life that you intend to say goodbye to once and for all. Complete your interior with inspiring details for a happier life. Don't forget about a comfortable office environment. Such changes will definitely benefit you and inspire you to new accomplishments.

It happens that the need for change comes before our willingness to accept these changes is born. The lack of a clear plan and backup option should not be scary and become a hindrance. Even if the prospects are not clear to you now, you should not give up the opportunity for qualitative changes because of this. The main thing is to follow the desires and dreams that lead us forward. Be open to new knowledge and experience, and change will no longer cause you fear, but will become a natural part of your life.

Tags: psychology fears motivation

The unknown inevitably causes stress

The earliest written definition of the fear of the unknown as one of the fundamental fears inherent in man is found in the American writer and philosopher Howard Lovecraft: “The oldest and strongest emotion of mankind is fear, and the oldest and most powerful kind of fear is the fear of the unknown.”

. His words were later confirmed by research by neuroscientists, who also emphasized the direct relationship between fear of the unknown and increased levels of stress and anxiety.

We are afraid of changes because when we decide on them, we take a lot of risks, because the result is always unpredictable. And it drives us crazy.