Oedipus complex in adult men, Electra complex in women

August 19, 2019
Psychology of Personality
Marusya the Cat

The Oedipus complex manifests itself in boys in the early stages of development. The child begins to position himself as a man and falls in love with his own mother, since she is the first closest woman in his life. A similar situation arises in girls when the baby feels attracted to the first man in her life - her father. This condition is called the Electra complex.

General information

The Oedipus complex and the Electra complex are a disorder of psychosexual development associated with the presence in children (boys and girls, respectively) of an internal universal unconscious erotic attraction and attachment to one of the parents and jealousy of the other.
The concept was introduced into psychology by Sigmund Freud in 1897, but it is still an important component of the psychological analysis of a person. It can be assumed that “we are all Oedipus” and every child experiences a phallic stage of development and it is the problems of the Oedipus constellation that become the core of all neuroses .

History of the term

The name "Oedipus complex" is based on the story of the ancient Greek myth, which tells the story of King Oedipus, who killed his own father and married his mother. Thus, Sigmund Freud, in his correspondence with his friend Wilhelm Fliess, compared his jealousy of his father and love for his mother with the “bewitching power of Oedipus” and called this a universal phenomenon of early childhood. He put forward his assumption in a work about special types of choice of a sexual object by men, where he described that a boy who lusts after his mother and hates his father falls under the influence of the Oedipus phenomenon.

Oedipus complex in Freudian psychology and other variations

According to Freud, the Oedipus and Electra complex should be considered as a stage of psychosexual perception and development, first manifesting itself in early childhood - between 2-3 years of age. This is the so-called period of awareness by the primate of genitality (phallicity), combining the oral and anal attraction of the previous stages into a developed libido. It may be of primary importance in the formation of various neurotic deviations and sexual disorders. However, opponents of the Freudian school do not recognize the paramount importance of Oedipus disorder in human psychosexual development and the likelihood of psychosis.

Thus, according to Adler, the Oedipus complex should be perceived as a manifestation of childhood spoilage, the result of errors in education and maternal connivance, because a child who is accustomed to getting everything he wants, for example, a lot of affection and attention, develops sexually faster and believes that erotic desires are also must also be satisfied with the only source available at that time - the mother.

Erich Fromm, although he mostly agreed with Freud (data source - Wikipedia), however, proposed to consider the Oedipus stage not only in the sexual aspect, but also in a wider range of attachments. Thus, hostility towards the father can be caused by the authoritarianism of patriarchy and the possessive attitude of the parents, restricting the independence and freedoms of the child.

Otto Rank suggested that the Oedipus complex may be the result of a child's desire to preserve his individuality by pitting his parents against each other. While they, in turn, fight openly or secretly for the child’s favor, the choice usually falls on the parent who least encroaches on the child’s individuality.

In addition, Freud’s teaching does not take into account the influence of brothers and sisters in the formation of the Oedipus complex, it underestimates the weight of the mother’s influence, prohibitions and temptations, and the Electra complex in the psychology of women is not sufficiently substantiated.

Development time

Periods of development of the Oedipus complex:

Oral – the time from 0 to 1.5 years, when the child is closely connected with the mother. His mouth is his most basic tool for experiencing the world and experiencing pleasure. The primary object of pleasure during this period is the mother's breast. Breastfeeding time becomes an inevitable and very important ritual, during which the child receives maximum positive emotions.
The anal period is the time from 1.5 to 3 years when the child learns to defecate independently, while enjoying it. Not only from monitoring this process, but also from the encouragement of the child by the adults around him. Thus, he begins to realize his significance and the significance of his awareness. Self-control and self-awareness become a guide to a world where you can control your body.
The phallic period from 3 to 4 is another stage in the development of sexuality in a child. At this time, a person begins to recognize himself as an individual of a certain gender. Looking at the genitals, playing with them, comparing them with others is an integral part of the phallic period of personality development, which has as its main task the determination of gender.
Phallic-Oedipal period. Just at the age of 4-6 years, for the first time, a boy begins to desire his mother from a sexual point of view and be jealous of her father. As a representative of the female set of chromosomes, the girl discovers in herself envy of the owners of the penis, after some time expressing her love exclusively for her father, ignoring her mother.
The latent period is the age from 6 to 12 years, characterized by a temporary absence and extinction of sexual desires. The entire development of the child at this moment is aimed at communication, the educational process, and the establishment of a circle, in addition to sexual relationships.
Puberty begins at the age of 12-14 and is colored by a bright explosion of sexuality and the release of hormones. At this time, the Oedipus complex enters its final phase of development. The child moves into adolescence, and then into adulthood.

Sigmund Freud believed that people are born bisexual. At this time, due to the close one-sided relationship between the child and the mother, and due to the fact that the father’s role in caring for the child is quite insignificant, a non-stimulating period of development passes.

Then, around 2-3 years, the first manifestations of certain sexual preferences are observed. Then this process reaches peak values. In the period from 3 to 5 years, sexual awareness of oneself as a sexual object occurs. Then some manifestations of the Oedipus complex pass into the stage of a hidden, inhibited course, until the period of puberty at 12-14 years.

In childhood, the child only tries to push his parents away if they hug or kiss in front of him, and tries more to be close to the parent of the opposite sex. The boy, trying his best to be like his dad, offers his help to his mother, does not let her go a single step, trying to control her space, reserving the right to be near her.

The girl tries to look after her father, waits for him to return from work, brings her first drawings for his approval, or whispers her secrets in his ear. In adolescence, burdened by a surge of hormones and conflicting feelings, the Oedipus complex will cause constant hysterics and squabbles with a parent of the same sex.

Disobedience can escalate into an open, violent conflict. The teenager will speak unflatteringly about the aging parent, mock him, lash out with angry, accusatory speeches, mercilessly ridiculing his shortcomings. Thus, wanting to emphasize their wealth, attractiveness and competitiveness in the eyes of the parent of the opposite sex.

Pathogenesis

The pathogenesis is based on violations of early childhood mechanisms for determining personal sexuality and genitality, fear of loss of love and support, as well as attitudes and factors of the surrounding world. In this case, the individual desires to remain a child and feel attached to a protective figure, not so important - to his father or mother.

Peak values of the future personality disorder are predetermined by 3-5 years of the patient’s life. Then comes a stage of some extinction and further revival during puberty, which is determined by the choice of an individual erotic object.

If there is no natural resolution and formation of normal sexual orientation, then this is fraught with neurotic diseases - various neuroses, psychoses and addictions, as well as sexual deviations.

Classification

Depending on the sexual orientation of the sexual desire of Oedipus and the Electra complex can be positive or negative. A positive variety is considered to be the classic heterosexual variant of a disorder of psychosexual development - when a boy lusts after his mother, and a girl lusts after her father. However, if a child experiences sexual attraction to a parent of the same sex as him, then this is a negative homosexual version of the complex, based on the person’s ambivalence and bisexuality.

In addition, Freud also identified a more complete version of the Oedipus complex - a double manifestation of a positive and negative violation of sexual orientation, especially with pronounced bisexuality. For example, boys may develop ambivalent attitudes: displaying trepidation and choosing their mother as a sexual object, while at the same time behaving like a girl with a tender, feminine attitude towards her father against the backdrop of competition and hostility towards her mother.

Criticism

The Oedipus complex is, in psychology, a veiled sexual desire of a child to possess a mother or father, which is regularly criticized by various hypotheses.

Unscientific status of the hypothesis

Modern psychiatrists note the unreliability of Freud's theory due to the lack of any empirical data in it confirming the reliability of the concept. In their opinion, here is evidence related to subjective prejudices, and drawn by the followers of Freudianism to substantiate their hypotheses.

To substantiate their words, skeptics, including psychoanalysts A.M. Rutkevich, Joseph Naham and Owen Flanagan noted in their works that the fact of the existence of the Oedipus complex is based on self-analysis of S. Freud's childhood memories, and not on his objective observation of a group of patients.

Criticism of child sexuality

The author of “Classical Psychoanalysis” B.D. Karvasarsky seems doubtful about the fact of the emergence of a child’s sexual attraction to his mother or father, described in Freud’s theory. As evidence, the psychoanalyst provides data that before the onset of puberty, only a small amount of sex hormones is produced in the child’s body.

This concept is criticized by Freudians, who note that puberty of an individual is not associated only with the formation of genital structures.

Disputes about the universality of the Oedipus complex

The universality of the concept was criticized by the Polish anthropologist B. Malinowski, noting in his scientific work “Sex and Repression in the Society of Savages” that its manifestation is not typical for the inhabitants of the Trobriand Islands. His words were refuted by the Hungarian anthropologist Geza Roheim, who noted that during the 4 years he spent in Somalia and Australia, he repeatedly observed manifestations of the Oedipus complex described in Freud’s treatise “Totem and Taboo.”

Criticism in the context of schizoanalysis

In their work “Anti-Oedipus,” the creators of schizoanalysis, Gilles Deleuze and Felix Guattari, criticized the concept of the Oedipus complex, describing it as “the personification of the repressive spirit of bourgeois family relations.” In their opinion, the Oedipus complex is limited and is not able to explain the complex modern social structures and processes. They also noted that the Freudian concept is untenable in the treatment of schizophrenia and psychosis.

Feminist criticism

Representatives of feminism, including Kate Millett and Juliet Mitchell, criticized the theory of the Oedipus complex for suggesting that women have envy of the male penis. They also noted that this concept is a product of the “Victorian era,” during which any manifestation of femininity was strictly punished and aimed at the oppression of women.

Oedipus complex

As evidence, followers of feminism cited the opinion that a woman cannot have envy of an organ that does not exist in her, since she could never experience the benefits of its presence.

Causes

There are several theories about the development of the Oedipus complex and the Electra complex. Psychosexual development disorders may be associated with:

biological determinism and individual characteristics of Oedipus triangulation;
fear of losing love;
errors in upbringing in the form of excessive pampering of the child, immediate satisfaction of all physical needs, as well as the child’s observation of sexual scenes;
strong attachment to the parent, including envious attachment (in girls to the penis) and the need to remain with protective figures - parents;
excessive desire for personal possession;
the desire to remain a child or return to the mother's womb;
frustration during weaning and the development of a jealous attitude towards the mother;
the image of a strict “castrating” despotic mother in the sadistic aspect of understanding the child.

Super Ego

As we have already discussed in the article, the Oedipus complex in boys

According to Freud, the fear of castration prompts the boy to renounce his incestuous claims on his mother.
But how does a girl overcome the Oedipal desire if she has nothing to lose
?
After all, “one cannot speak of castration anxiety in the real sense when castration has already been accomplished”
(“
Inhibition, symptom, anxiety
.” Freud).

In this regard, Freud remembers simply punishment

, which I “forgot” to mention as a measure of boys’ education.

“The little girl who considers herself a favorite, preferred by her father, must one day endure severe punishment

, imposed by the father, and feel thrown from heaven."
(“ The Death of the Oedipus Complex
.” Freud)

All other factors of upbringing, which Freud classified as secondary

in overcoming the Oedipus complex in a boy.
The difference lies in effectiveness
, because only the fear of castration, according to Freud,
“becomes the most powerful driving force of further development”
(“
Introduction to Psychoanalysis
”).

“With the elimination of the fear of castration, a very compelling motive for the formation of a superego

... These changes - much more than in boys - are the result of upbringing,
external intimidation
,
threats of loss of parental love
.”
(“ The Death of the Oedipus Complex
.” Freud)

“Under these conditions the formation of the superego must suffer; it will not be able to achieve that strength and independence which gives it cultural significance” (“ Introduction to Psychoanalysis

" Freud)

“I talk about this reluctantly, but I can’t help thinking that the normal level of morality for a woman is different. The superego will never be so inexorable, so impersonal and so independent of its affective sources as we demand of a man. Characteristics that criticism has long reproached a woman, that she is less capable of experiencing a sense of justice than a man, that she is less able to obey the persistent necessities of life, that in her decisions she is more often guided by tender and hostile feelings - these characteristic traits find sufficient justification in the above modification of the formation of the super-ego of a woman" (“ Some mental consequences of the anatomical difference between the sexes

" Freud)

One can understand why Freud came to such conclusions by observing the women of his time and his patients. After all, it is true that women of the middle and upper class were spoiled, childish, did not work, and therefore their Super-Ego was undeveloped. However, Freud later became convinced that this was not the rule. So his patient and close friend Maria Bonaparte, an active and responsible woman, saved him and his family from inevitable death in a concentration camp, taking them from Austria to England. And, by the way, Marie Bonaparte also did not have a penis. It is a pity that on the basis of this Freud did not make appropriate adjustments to his theory.

Symptoms

According to the classical ideas of psychoanalysis, the Oedipus complex is characteristic of males. Its manifestation begins with the emergence in a boy of sexual attraction and libidinal desires towards his own mother or a figure replacing her against the background of a simultaneous feeling of hostility and jealous impulses towards his own or adoptive father. Fear and expectation of punishment from the father, for example, by castration, force the child to attempt to hide hostile and incestuous impulses. The fear of castration plays an important role in the mental life of a boy; it stimulates the formation of a special instance - a special Superego, the influence of which can suppress incestuous urges and sexual attraction to his mother. This stimulates identification with the parent.

As for girls, according to Freud, they may also experience similar first early incestuous impulses towards their mother. But when at 2-3 years old a girl realizes that she does not have a penis, the so-called feeling of “penis envy” begins to arise. Exposure to such a neurotic problem initiates an increase in envious attachment towards the father and resentful resentment towards the mother. The child begins to see the mother as a rival who claims the father’s mutual love. As a result, the internal conflict can be resolved through attempts to compensate for one’s inferiority through the opportunity to become pregnant.

In addition to psychological problems, increased anxiety , depression , isolation, psychosis and neuroses , individuals with an unresolved Oedipus complex develop organic disorders, for example, impotence or frigidity in adult relationships due to the suppression of libidinal desires. Manifestations of neuroses in adults are expressed in the form of various dependencies, insatiability, possessiveness and jealousy towards various objects.

Between Oedipus and narcissism (identification and the role of the father)

E.V. Zhalunene

CLINICAL PSYCHOANALYSIS

The use of identification in psychoanalysis raises many problems, both theoretical and practical. Identification is the result of two opposing functions, one of which is instability, displacement; play, the other - continuity and constancy (I am a sediment of identifications). How to reconcile these two functions? I am interested in changing the paradigm, which introduces a transition from narcissistic identification, necessary at a certain stage, to secondary, post-oedipal identifications, which we talk about only in the plural and which allow us to simultaneously preserve the object and leave it. From the way of expressing drives and even the structure of fantasy, as Z. Freud described it in “The Interpretation of Dreams,” identification becomes in his works after 1920 the creator J. Z. Freud connects it with the investment of the object, which is the first expression of the affective connection with it , preceding any object selection.

He insists in many works on the primary nature of identification, which occurs before any investment in the object. On this basis we can conclude that primary identification, unlike all others, is not a product of loss. It seems to me that this statement introduces some kind of “third” from the very beginning. Identification is primary, and the very first identification, as S. Freud writes in “Mass Psychology and Analysis of the Human Self,” is identification with the father of personal prehistory, behind which the Ideal Self is hidden [5]. In 1914, in his work “On Narcissism,” S. Freud first wrote about the phantasm of the primitive scene [2]. This makes identification with the father the link between narcissism and Oedipus.

From the point of view of psychoanalysis, the mother is considered by the child as having a belly, breast, skin, smell, the father - as having a function. On the one hand, bodily reality, on the other, the abstraction of functioning. Between them is a child completely dependent on them. So, a subject can only come into existence in the presence of an object. In my opinion, M. Audi is right when he asks: “Is it possible to think about our patients, about ourselves, without reference to Oedipus as an internal support, a frame beyond which there is no more thought?”

It is necessary to emphasize that there are not only two objects from the very beginning, but also two different ways of investing: investment of drives and identification. Both methods of investment make sense only in connection with the object, since identification, the creator of the I, is also the fate of the drives. In S. Freud's “I and It” the problem of identification is not completely resolved, since we are talking only about secondary identification. “This is identification with the beloved parents of early childhood,” writes S. Freud, “and this is introjective identification, which is associated with the resolution of the Oedipus complex, i.e. refusal, at least partial, from incestuous objects” [6]. This implies the grief done to these objects.

Regarding the mechanism of introjection, S. Freud turns to the model of melancholic introjection, the characteristic of which is the failure of grief. This is grief that has not been experienced and could not be experienced due to strong separation anxiety or the insufficiency of the object. The lost object is introjected into the Self, but it covers the Self (the shadow of the object falls on the Self) without being assimilated into it. Therefore, S. Freud speaks here of narcissistic identification, which implies a confusion of the identities of subject and object. The rejection of narcissistic identification in favor of introjective identification is the main economic problem of analysis.

Separation anxiety produces constant helplessness at all subsequent stages of development. From here may arise the most pathological aspects of the primal scene, associated with intense envy, caused by the phantasm of continuous coitus between parents who never separate. The two types of object investment discussed above certainly regulate this process. The important thing is that the influence of one object is limited by the existence of another. Just by his very existence, the forefather weakens the physical connection with the mother, gives meaning to hatred, which is directed towards what limits pleasure and crystallizes in the personality the connection between hatred and protection. The restrictions imposed by the father guarantee from the very beginning the possibility of investing in an object without the danger of getting lost in it.

Alain de Mijolly talks about the process of identification in terms of unconscious identification phantasms [10]. The first phantasm can be called “Being Everything” or “I am the breast,” which is subsequently expressed in the form of nostalgic megalomania. This phantasm finds its point of departure and at the same time its refutation in hallucinatory satisfaction. Frustration is associated with ongoing painful tension, which only an object can end. The subject born as a result of the failure of this phantasm is forced to admit: “I am not the All.” And also the object of the first identification that creates his I, which from now on will be the subject expressing the phantasm.

In “The Ego and the Id,” S. Freud described this identification and attributed it to the birth of the “Ideal of the Ego,” since behind it lies the first and most important identification with the father from personal prehistory, which emerges from the phylogenetic traces of the father of the primitive horde [6]. The narcissistic roots of omnipotence belong to him, who had no libidinal connections, loved no one but himself, and used others to solve his needs. This narcissistic identification is seized upon by the child as essential to becoming big; identification with the one who escapes the omnipotence of the first seductress, the object of the first and most powerful love.

My patient Eugene, whose father was an alcoholic and occupied a very modest place in the family and in the memories of his mother after death, idealized his relationships with men who were older than him, and composed stories about his courageous relationships with them. These stories protected him from his mother, who seduced and used him. His phantasmatic activity remained hidden from his mother and allowed him some autonomy. In the process of analysis, he imagines a meeting with his great-grandfather, whom he knows was a rich Moscow merchant: “I walk along Petrovka and see an elderly man whom I immediately recognize, and he says to me: “So, my grandson, tell me me, what have you achieved? And when I tell everything, my great-grandfather says: “I recognize you, grandson, I’m proud of you!” They go to buy expensive suits at Petrovsky Passage. Eugene cries, imagining this meeting with his narcissistic double - a protector who would help him become better in order to seduce me, and who, like him, is dressed in a beautiful suit in order to neglect me.

This happened at a time when Evgeniy, a 24-year-old virgin, met a girl Evgenia and entered into a loving relationship with her that brought pleasure and was permeated with sadomasochism. “Our thoughts and desires are completely the same,” he says. The seduction of the ideal great-grandfather, to which the grandson succumbs in order to seduce the object, is a structuring identification that introduces identification with the Oedipal father. Remaining in his projective identification, Evgeniy says that he intends to break up with his Zhenya, since he has already helped her cope with her masochism, showed her that you can dress beautifully and be a woman. But her masochism is too great, and staying with a woman like her is like playing chess with yourself. At this time, he makes reactions in the analysis, buys prostitutes and conducts soul-saving conversations with them. My fee is absolutely equivalent to the price he pays to the prostitute he is analyzing. Evgeny still dreams of a “real, red-haired and unpredictable” woman whom he will definitely meet.

Narcissistic seduction leading to identification with the ideal grandfather seems to me a very delicate point to work through in the analysis of male patients, since it can strengthen phallic or fetishistic defenses that cause the situation to freeze. When the defense against the object drive misses its target and leads to disobjectification, the idealization of the omnipotent forefather becomes self-destructive.

In “Mourning and Melancholia” S. Freud leaves undeveloped the concept of narcissistic identification with a mixture of identities - subjective and objective [3]. M. Klein developed a conceptual approach to this type of identification and called it “projective identification,” since this method of defense includes a projection through which the subject can reject certain parts of himself. At the same time, identification with this object is characterized by a confusion of mental and even physical identities with the object onto which the projection is made. Projective identification is the most typical form of narcissistic identification. A number of authors - A. Green, J.-L. Donnet [1, 7] and others - emphasize that the primary identification with the father of personal prehistory predetermines the structure in reasoning about the identification and formation of the self. We see the dual nature of the manifestation of personality: on the one hand , the body and its partial attractions to the primary object (necessarily partial), on the other hand, primary identification with the object, which is holistic, total, as it is located in the register of being.

J. Kristeva uses lyrical terms in relation to primary identification, speaking about the illuminating, bright role of the father in personal prehistory [8]. The imaginary father reveals that the child is still not enough for the mother; there is someone else to whom her desire is directed. Thanks to this insufficiency, this distance, the representation of the phantasm of desire finds a place for its expansion, and the imaginary father becomes the one who gives meaning to this phantasm. This is a necessary idealization, writes J. Kristeva, and here she sees great opportunities for the analyst. Belonging to the human race is a different register of life. Human reality is identified with the unconscious category - the father. This reality gives narcissistic guarantees to each individual as part of the human race. Double identification, which precedes all others and is common to both sexes, announces post-Oedipal identifications, which make it possible to preserve the object in post-Oedipal identifications of the Superego. Dualism, which constantly revives the teachings of S. Freud, is in opposition to two types of investment, the mutual regulation of which is obvious. On the one hand, the investment of the mother as a necessary object for physical survival, the source of the first excitement and autoeroticism, on the other, identification with the father - the bearer of the ideal, promising a great future. Moreover, the power of one object limits the power of another, since we are talking about childhood parents, bisexuality, the opposition of the instinct of self-preservation and sexual drives, the drive to life and the drive to death, the strengthening of connections and their destruction. The extreme degree of violation of this dualism is manifested in melancholic identification, the threat of the ego returning to the primary narcissistic identification as realized incest.

S. Freud's reflections on melancholia everywhere reveal an unimaginable longing for the maternal object. Question: due to what weakness of the father does J. Kristeva put forward the hypothesis that sublimation is born in melancholy? This is confirmed by many writers, among whom is my favorite F.M. Dostoevsky. “But what is beautiful, can it be sad? Beauty... is it associated with ephemerality and grief? Or does a beautiful object return every time after destruction and war to show that life triumphs over death, that immortality is possible? Beauty, art... is this the ideal object that will never disappoint the libido. Or the beautiful object appears as an absolute and indestructible reparation of the object that leaves, that abandons, placing itself from the very beginning on a basis different from the libidinal one, which is so mysteriously attractive and deceiving. In the place of death or in order not to die from the death of another, the Self creates or at least appreciates art, artificial, an ideal, something that is on the other side, beautiful, which can replace all mortal values. Where does the black sun of melancholy come from? Where does this stream of sadness come from, this inexpressible pain that grips us from time to time, causing us to lose the taste of words, actions, the taste of life in the end? Lifeless life, ready to lurch towards death every second. Is death revenge or death liberation? Worry about life slowing down or stopping. The absence of the meaning of others, foreignness, the accident of naive happiness, give rise to the highest moments of my metaphysics in me. At the border of life and death, a proud feeling is born, associated with the experience of the absurdity of connections and existence itself. My pain, the hidden sister of my philosophy, its silent sister. Without a predisposition to melancholy, there is no psyche, but only reaction. Art and research are the sublimation of a lost thing or, in other terminology, a partial object. Through the polyvalence of signs and symbols, which, on the one hand, blur the meaning, and on the other hand, show the multiplicity of connections, give a chance to imagine something that lacks meaning. Identification with an ideal that makes it possible to repress the shame associated with a narcissistic wound or the guilt of revenge. Our capacity for imagination is the ability to bring meaning to that which is associated with its loss in death. The vitality of idealization, of the imaginary, is both a miracle and a dispersion of a miracle, an illusion, a dream and words, words, words... It confirms the omnipotence of the temporary, that which can speak until death.”

In the analysis of the girl, the elaboration of the identification with the father of the background is of great importance. Her first love object is similar to her, more charged with orality, since nothing makes a difference between them. For a boy, the owner of a penis, greater independence is given by the autoerotic investment of the penis. For a girl, identification with the phallic father is important for two reasons: to establish her narcissism in the sense of phallic completeness, despite the absence of a penis, and to allow herself to free herself from the primary object. The identification in the sense of recognition that the phallic father establishes, the support of her desexualized activity, the opening of the way for the sublimation that it implies, are important for the girl to establish her narcissistic invulnerability. This makes it possible to separate from the oral or anal mother in the sense of a secondary identification, synonymous with her female gender and arising not on the basis of the idealization of the penis, but on the basis of gender difference.

It is important here to separate phallicity into girl pretensions and penis envy. The first is identification, the second is fetishization of the penis, which leads to inhibition of mental activity, which is associated with the sexualization of identification with the phallic father and the virtues belonging to him. Identification with the father helps to circumvent this fate of penis envy. In 1923, in “Infantile Genital Organization” S. Freud wrote: “For the two sexes there is only one genital organ - the male. Thus there is no primacy of the genitals, there is a primacy of the phallus. In other words, the phallus is not masculine, it is narcissistic. The girl has a great predisposition to melancholy, to fears of being closed by the primary object. Narcissistic identification may remain hidden because it presupposes a syntonicity of gender identity—the phallic identification of the boy with his father and the melancholic identification of the girl with her mother” [4].

Secondary identifications cannot be spoken of except in the plural. Identification with the phallic father, parallel to the investment of the maternal object, cannot but lead to conflict. The ambivalence inherent in identification appears, something that can be foreseen in Eugene, which was mentioned earlier. From a protector, the father turns into a prohibitive figure, crystallizing hatred. There is a rejection of narcissistic identification with the idealized father, his disidealization in favor of identification with the one who possesses the mother in sexual relations. Secondary identification with the Oedipal father is identification with a father who has drives and is no longer self-sufficient. For him, the female object, femininity, is important, which implies desire and castration. This shows the son not only the castration of the father, but also of the mother, the object of the father's investment. I do not dwell on the son’s erotic feelings for his father, since I remain in the register of identification with the father, but I will note that as a result of these feelings, a female identification is formed, which returns to the mother, but not as the primary object, but as the Oedipal mother. Maternal femininity is also a means of approaching the Oedipal father.

“Why are post-Oedipal identifications not melancholic identifications?” - asks S. Freud. Because they are dual and each of them counteracts the other and confirms its partial nature. Dual identifications - and there are no more object relations with the protagonists of the primary scene. Refusal of Oedipus opens the way to a personal future, promotes the continuity of generations and gives the role of an actor on stage. A person is doomed to fight for his place in the world that existed before him, to abandon the phantasm of “Being Everything” through the phantasm of “Being Unique,” writes Alain de Mijolla. And then he continues: “Under the burden of the Oedipus complex, the concept of generational differences, the confrontation with the phantasm of the primitive scene and the discovery of the anatomical difference of the sexes, the narcissism of the child undergoes new disappointments. To compensate for this, the saga of the parents fills narcissistic cracks in self-representations through resemblance to the parents. The fantasy of “Being unique” turns into “I am like others.” This fantasy is expressed in the conformism of school-age children. These others come in identifications as either supporters or rivals” [10].

The desire of one Oedipal object for another gives meaning to the subject. There is no symbolic function of the father without the woman and his desire for her. The father thus introduces the difference between the sexes, which is the whole point. The subject finds himself, finds meaning through the phantasm of a primitive scene. As J. Laplanche and J.-B. Pontalis write, “this is a scenario with many inputs in which the subject finds his place” [9]. Let us add that it is a crystallizer of mental activity. Once repressed, this script becomes an object of symbolization. What is not symbolized comes from the outside, if we recall Freud's The Wolf Man, where castration is denied. If the script of the primary scene is built based on the autoeroticism of the subject, which allows him to fantasmatically experience all the roles in the scene, actively reproducing them, then the subject has the opportunity to exit the primary scene. This can be expressed in terms of identification, which is what S. Freud did in 1928: “Identification satisfies instinctual desires by transforming the Self into a desired object in such a way that the Self is at the same time the subject who has the desires and the desired one. an object". So, the conclusion suggests itself that for the organization of the psyche nothing is needed other than the existence of the phantasm of a primitive scene.

Let me give you an example of splitting. The patient states: “I can’t imagine my mother having a sexual relationship with my father, I don’t think there was any. The men who came to her after her divorce from her father tormented her. In the morning I was afraid to see a corpse in her room. I often imagine my father being cut into pieces.” This double sadistic primitive scene cannot be defined except as a negation. Later the patient says: “I don’t exist, I don’t have my own desires.” This makes me ask: “Do you feel empty, not existing, to destroy the relationship between the parents who gave you life”? She cries, then, after a silence that seems introjective to me, she is surprised to understand what a man’s desire for a woman means: “Until today, when I imagined spouses, I thought of two horses harnessed to one team.” What better way to say this about denying the meaning of parental relationships? It is difficult for the patient to imagine herself in this scene, to survive it in order to take her place in the continuity of generations.

Another example is about a merger. Olga was a liaison in the relations of divorced parents, bringing money to her mother, given from time to time by her father to “raise her daughter.” She had to lure money out, following her mother’s script drawn up before each visit to her father. Returning, Olga felt exhausted and did not understand, being in a symbiotic relationship with her mother, why her father called her hypocritical. The daughter became a carrier of the bad part of the mother and entered into a relationship with the father whom the mother imagined.

At the beginning of the analysis, when Olga considered me “the ultimate truth” and was waiting for instructions from me to build a bright future, she had a dream - her mother calmly entered and exited an underground mine, but Olga could not. I make the comment: “Just like in our relationship with you, from which I can get out and you cannot, you remain in the same relationship with your father, following the instructions of your mother.” All men seemed to her like rapists who wanted “only one thing.”

The next dream is Olga at the bottom of a deep hole in which a stick is immersed, she realizes with horror that she cannot get out of it. I comment that it was possible to grab onto a stick and climb up. Olga is surprised and says: “It’s strange, such a simple thought did not occur to me.” Gradually, her relationship with her father changes, she begins to go to him more often to consult or share something, and her father opens up to her from the other side.

Another dream that crystallizes the original scene. Olga sees a pregnant woman (herself) on the shore of a large lake, holding a large stick in her hands. When asked why she needs this stick, Olga replies: “To immerse it in her womb and destroy the child who is there, me.” Her relationships with men, which were remarkably similar to her relationship with her father, began to change. Olga says that she has learned to see and hear them. She got married but couldn't get pregnant. I suggested that perhaps she thinks that by remaining “faithful” to her mother, she remains sterile, since her mother did not have children after her. Noticing my pregnancy, Olga was delighted and, smiling slyly, said: “I thought that you and I were doing important business here, and your husband was sitting idle in the other room. But you really can get out of our relationship.” Olga completed the analysis and gave birth to a daughter a year later. I think about this girl. Will she be able to give up playing with nesting dolls, these “Russian dolls” as they are called in France?

Literature

Green A. Dead Mother // French Psychoanalytic School / Ed. A. Zhibo, A. V. Rossokhina. - St. Petersburg: Peter, 2005. - P.333-362
Freud Z. On narcissism // Freud Z. Basic instinct. - M.: Olimp; LLC Publishing House AST-LDT, 1998. - P.128-154.
Freud Z. Grief and melancholia // Freud Z. Basic psychological theories in psychoanalysis. - St. Petersburg: Aletheia, 1998. - P.211-232.
Freud Z. Infantile genital organization (addition to sexual theory) // Freud Z. Basic instinct. - M.: Olimp; LLC Publishing House AST-LDT, 1998. - P.123-127.
Freud Z. Psychology of the masses and analysis of the human self // Freud Z. Totem and taboo. - St. Petersburg. - M.: Olimp; LLC Publishing House AST-LDT, 1998. - pp. 279-348.
Freud Z. I and It// Favorites. - M.: Vneshtorgizdat, 1989. - P.370-398.
Donnet JL. Le divan bien tempere. - Paris: PUF, 1995.
Kristeva J. Le soleil noir: dépression et mélancolie. - Paris: Gallimard, 1987.
Laplanche J., Pontalis J.-B. Origine des fantasmes, fantasme des origins. - Paris: PUF, 1978.
Mijolla A.de. Identifier-etre identifier-s identifier // Rev. franc. psychonal., 2002.

Oedipus complex in adult men

The Oedipus stage can be considered as a normal experience characteristic of most people, while pathological consequences arise as a result of the inability to cope with the confusion of emotions and feelings, Oedipal contradictions - excessive love for one of the parents and hatred for the other, the inability to separate from them.

It is very important for the psychology of a man at the Oedipal stage, along with the suppression (repression from consciousness) of his base desires, to begin to adopt the features of his father and see the similarities with this figure. This process is facilitated by the acquisition of a conglomerate of different values and moral attitudes, tactics of gender role behavior and understanding of how to be a man. In identification with the father, it is important to retain the mother as an object of love through substitution, because he has the same attributes that the mother likes in the father. Another important aspect of the successful resolution of the Oedipal stage is the ability to accept parental prohibitions and the foundations of morality, and to form a superego - the child’s conscience. In general, the symptom complex in adulthood boils down to:

the presence of problems of mature sexuality;
the formation of a special super-ego that determines and controls human behavior, the location of guilt, conscience and morality.

In adult men, the Oedipus complex can manifest itself:

disharmony in relationships with people;
the presence of existential difficulties;
loneliness;
increased anxiety ;
feeling of inferiority.

Treatment

The office of a psychoanalyst or psychotherapist is the most suitable place to look for treatment methods. But most importantly, the owner of a set of manifestations of such a mental state must try with all his might to get out of this state.

Treatment of the Oedipus complex, which is perpetuated by stress and nervousness, is a long and complex process. The emotional connection between children and parents is the strongest, and it is impossible to break it. And pursuing precisely this goal is impossible even with the use of medications. There will be no positive dynamics.

In the treatment of the Oedipus complex in children, a clear example of correct family relationships and the presence of a healthy, independent, intelligent man nearby can be useful. When there is no clearly directed positive model of behavior, not only a father, but also a coach or teacher, an older brother or friend, a favorite actor or athlete can become a role model.

For adult men, treatment of the Oedipus complex results in a serious, continuous struggle with their superego. In this case, it is not at all easy to bring the super-ego out of the depths of the subconscious, to subordinate the instincts to total and comprehensive control. But as a result of this struggle, next to the mother there will be not a notorious, capricious child, but an adult, adequate, reliable man.

Oedipus complex in boys

The development of the Oedipus complex in boys begins with an all-consuming desire to solely possess the mother as the main source of satisfaction of all needs against the background of the developing erotic nature of attachment, while the child:

is hostile towards the father and his tender expressions towards the mother;
rejoices and behaves well when the father leaves or is simply absent;
shows a lot of tenderness and promises his mother to marry her when he grows up;
may have ambivalent attitudes and at the same time show great tenderness towards the father;
characterized by more capricious behavior and mental lability;
games and dreams with erotic overtones;
the child asks to go to the toilet and sleep with the parent, shows undisguised sexual curiosity and the first attempts at seduction;
in older age, compulsive masturbation and the development of castration anxiety are possible.

The manifestation of the Oedipus complex in boys is associated with the development of envious attachment to a parent and can occur in two ways:

due to the desire to put himself in the place of his father, the child begins to treat his mother like a husband and then the father becomes superfluous - an obstacle standing in their way of happiness;
when a child has a desire to replace his mother and reunite with his beloved father, the mother becomes superfluous, but the difficulties in “playing adult roles” are associated with a lack of knowledge and clear ideas about satisfying love relationships.

How to get rid of the Oedipus complex

It is better to fight the syndrome at the first unhealthy signs (scandals, quarrels with the father, encroachments on the mother’s personal space), that is, parents should do this. What to do for those who have already grown up, but the complex remains with them? That's what:

Establish a trusting relationship with another person. He can be of any gender, age and status. The main thing is that you can always talk to him, trust him with your most secret things and not be judged.
Build relationships (friendships or love) that will fully meet the needs for love, acceptance, significance, and care. Every person needs this.
Increase stress resistance and learn to solve life’s difficulties on your own, and not hide behind your mother or wife’s skirt.
Develop communication skills with friends and enemies, partners and competitors. A person must navigate and maintain composure and self-confidence in any situation.

It is almost impossible to cope with this on your own as an adult, so it is better to turn to a psychotherapist for professional treatment.

Important! To prevent the development of the complex, parents should clearly but gently indicate that competition with mom or dad is impossible.

Oedipus complex in women (Electra complex)

According to the theory of Carl Gustav Jung, since Freudianism is not able to adequately explain a similar stage in girls when they experience homosexual attraction to their mother, the term “Electra complex” was coined, named after the daughter of Agamemnon, who, according to ancient Greek mythology, experienced sexual desires for her own father and was hostile towards her mother. And despite the presence of sexual overtones, the scientist associated this form of psychosexual development with the symbolic desire of human nature to turn to the original source of life.

Oedipus complex in adult women

In the life of every person, the features of relationships and the emotional saturation of the triad “mother-child-father” are important. The most important aspect in a woman’s psychology is not the process of sexual development of a little girl, but the transition from the dual parent-child relationship to the stage of conscious relationships with other people.

Like boys, girls' first love object is their mother. However, when a girl enters the phallic stage, she realizes that she does not have a penis, which may symbolize a lack of strength. She blames her mother for being born “defective.” At the same time, the girl strives to possess her father, jealous that he has the power and love of her mother. Over time, the girl gets rid of the Electra complex by suppressing cravings for her father and identifying herself with her mother. In other words, by becoming more like her mother, a girl gains symbolic access to her father, thereby increasing her chances of someday marrying a man like her father. In women, the phallic fixation, as Freud noted, leads to a tendency to flirt, seduce, and be promiscuous, although they may sometimes appear naive and sexually innocent.

Electra complex in girls

The emergence of sexual attraction in girls to their fathers begins at the Oedipal stage of psycho-emotional development and proceeds in the same way as in boys. It all starts with a tender affection for dad and a desire to eliminate his mother, taking her place. The girls flirt and use the means of very mature femininity. However, it is very important, behind the image of a charming little coquette girl, not to forget for parents about the seriousness of the situation and possible serious neurotic problems hidden behind this infantile situation.

It is very important for parents to realize the harm that they can cause to children by overprotection, connivance during sexual arousal, or, on the contrary, by establishing too many prohibitions, especially in sexual matters. It is recommended that during the period when the child is actively exploring the world, not to leave questions unanswered, to ask more often and explain points of interest. Children need to know that asking is normal and even commendable. In addition, it is important to share your feelings and experiences with them, to take care of their regular communication with other people in the social circle.

Signs of the complex in adulthood

The Oedipus complex in adult men is expressed in the inability to refuse the care of the mother. Even when he finds a new family, a man cannot tear himself away from his mother’s skirt.
He is quite happy that his mother is still caring for him.
If you manage to marry him, then he will most often prefer to marry a woman older than himself. Similar to her mother, if not in appearance, then in her main character traits.
Once married, such a man will do everything to prevent the birth of children.
If a child is nevertheless born into the family, such men will be jealous of their wife for the child.
The wife of such a man will be constantly compared to his mother, and the mother will constantly monitor how and what is being done for her son.
Outwardly, an adult, strong, attractive, sexy man behaves more like a small child. With childhood grievances and attempts to prove something to someone. Most often this results in a fight against windmills, but at the same time demanding rewards as for a heroic act.
The most dangerous outcome of the case is incest. In exceptional cases, an act of sexual intimacy occurs between mother and son. The adult son, having turned into a man, fully aware of the immorality of his behavior, is satisfied with the feeling of victory, having received the most desired and forbidden, and takes, as it seems to him, his rightful place next to the woman whom he madly loves almost all his life. In this situation, first of all, the mother suffers, falling into the abyss of moral problems and remorse, reaching a dead end of confrontation between her own feelings and moral self-flagellation.

Sometimes psychoanalysts can advise, in cases where the situation has reached the point of incest, for a mother suffering from nervous shock to find a man or even create a new marriage, believing that the appearance of another man in the house will help cool the son’s passion for his mother.

It is difficult to say what guides these experts, but in real life such a situation can lead to even greater suffering. The son will no longer give up his place next to his mother. Even if she gets married.

And even if any man, or father, if incest occurred in a complete family, has intimate intimacy with a woman, the son will still find ways to remain alone with his mother. Through blackmail, reproaches, ultimatums or threats of suicide, he will force her to have sex. The son will definitely look for ways to get rid of his opponent, asserting himself next to his mother.

The woman is in a dependent position. There can only be one way out: you need to go to the doctor. Otherwise, a deadlock situation will lead to severe nervous disorders, depression, and in particularly difficult cases, suicide attempts.

Diet for the Oedipus complex and Electra complex

Diet for the nervous system

Efficacy: therapeutic effect after 2 months
Timing: constantly
Cost of food: 1700-1800 rubles per week

The Oedipus complex is considered the core of all neurological problems, so it is extremely important to take care of the psychological balance and health of the body by providing it with a balanced diet and proper habits (drinking water, getting enough sleep, walking in the fresh air, etc.). Nutritionists recommend building a diet around dietary meat, offal, cereals, vegetable oil, vegetables and fruits. To improve your well-being you should add to the menu:

black chocolate;
a variety of fresh fruits and berries;
greenery;
nuts;
seafood;
cheeses.