The guy is cheating! What's a girl to do? You can, of course, “turn a blind eye” to his actions. You can cry all your tears to make it easier... and forgive. But you understand that this is not a solution!
Cheated on you - find out everything, talk and break up...
Can't live without him? - Forgive him for everything and pretend that nothing happened, that there was no “infidelity.”
Everyone experiences a breakup at some point!
From personal life
I had a young man whom I was madly in love with. He gave me a ring, swore eternal love... And for the first time I believed in a fairy tale! We were together for almost a year. But then he suddenly said that we were not suitable for each other. I cried, worried, went crazy... After some time, my beloved called and offered to meet. I pretended that I had no time, that I treated our meeting with great indifference... However, I agreed to meet him and flew to him “on wings”! We got back together. We lived a perfect life! Faith in fairy tales has returned. I even began to believe that happiness had come to me forever.
One day I returned home several hours early
It would be better if I stayed in some store! Opened the door... And I heard moans. I understood everything immediately. I wanted to cry, but no tears fell from my eyes. As if they felt trouble.
I stood motionless on the threshold and did not dare to enter the apartment. But I had to do this when I heard a conversation between Pasha and some girl. They realized that they were not alone. I was going to just run away, but Pasha came out into the corridor and stopped me.
He said the stupidest banality: “Yes, you understood everything wrong!”
The relationship is over
There were no quarrels, no hysterics, no showdowns... There was nothing more! I went home, leaving the clutch on a lonely shelf.
How did I live further?
I changed my mobile phone number, moved and completely went into work. Pavel looked for me, kept watch near shops, visited places where I had often visited before... But his actions did not change anything! I decided to put a bold and firm “full stop” on everything that once was!
I got married
I already have three children. I am happy that I have such a great husband. But I still remember Pashenka. I recently saw him in line at the cash register. And he saw me, but did not recognize me. And a friend said that Pasha was afraid to approach. The same version flashed through my head, but I “fought it off” as best I could.
Forgive your husband's cheating
- If you want to forgive a man, then you need to forget about the betrayal, and not remind you of it every time. Let him appreciate such a quality in you as the ability to forgive.
- Calmly talk about it. When a man is committed to “peace”, most often he chooses defensive tactics and agrees to the woman’s conditions.
- Whatever happens, always soberly assess the situation and make a decision. If you managed to notice in time that a man cheated on you and find out the reasons for the betrayal, perhaps you will be able to prevent a repetition of such an act and save your family.
- “A man is the head, and a woman is the neck”; wherever the neck turns, the head looks there. Show wisdom and vigilance. Eliminate possible causes of cheating.
- Spend more time together, it makes sense to go somewhere together to relax. Your sex life should be vibrant, experiment and then your man will be sure that you are that unique and sexy one, and is unlikely to want to cheat!
In conclusion, I would like to remind you that betrayal is not the end of the world, and therefore is it worth tormenting over it? After all, life doesn’t end there and a loving and devoted man worthy of you awaits you ahead!
“Execution cannot be pardoned...”
Are you looking for an answer to your question on various forums?
And I did exactly the same! Much of what I read stuck in my memory like an annoying thorn.
- I remember almost by heart what one girl from Krasnodar wrote:
“Betrayal is nothing compared to assault!”
But I can’t say which is worse. If my loved one hit me... I definitely wouldn't be able to forgive him. If you hit once, you'll hit twice! You can redo the same phrase on the topic of betrayal.
- Remember that there are exceptions to everything!
My friend, a classmate, forgave her boyfriend’s infidelity. And everything about them is great! Caroline married him and bore him five children. And all that was... Remained in the distant, distant past, which is preserved only by photographs.
- If there is no trust, then there is no point in continuing any relationship!
If you feel like you want to hire a private detective to test your loved one’s fidelity – break up with him! The fact is that such a desire will arise again and again. You understand: there can be no talk of any trust here!
- Treason for treason
My friend (work colleague) tried to take revenge for betrayal by cheating! Personally, I don’t understand this act. Olya says that she felt mentally better. Is it worth taking such a step for the sake of moral “relief”? I’m not going to judge anyone, because I don’t know what’s going on in every person’s soul.
What if he “cheats” on you on the Internet?
Don't worry, because there is no reason to panic. It's no secret that about 75% of men communicate with the opposite sex on social networks, on a dating site. Just find out how far flirting on the Internet goes and this virtual betrayal crosses the line of what is acceptable. You should have a serious conversation with a man if this online flirting turns into a real meeting, but if this is a harmless correspondence, do not attach any importance to it. Remember, with pressure and hysterics and attempts to forbid him something, you will achieve sharp resistance and aggression. Remember, you are the one who enjoys receiving compliments from men.
I have an important request to ask you: continue to live!
If it seems that after your loved one’s betrayal, life has passed and will never return, continue to live! Don't think about suicide!
How many more boyfriends will you have? And life is the only one. Think about your loved ones, your relatives, your dear people, if you are not able to think about yourself in “difficult” moments! No one has ever returned from the other world.
What to do? – Understand some things!
- If the person you care about cheated on you, start looking for “cons” in him!
Search, applying maximum effort to your search. If you find more, you will quickly understand that your “ideal” is completely unworthy of you!
- Everyone is capable of treason! Even those who got married...
In our world, everything is arranged in such a way that you need to be ready for anything at every second!
- Find another young man!
New love is the best “cure” for old... However, you shouldn’t “rush” to the first one you come across! Know how to wait. Learn to do this (as a last resort).
- I don’t recommend looking for love among your exes!
Look for it somewhere in the present or in the future. Or take a break from romantic relationships. Walk more often, meet with girlfriends, run around the shops. Don’t forget that your soulmate is capable of finding you (unexpectedly and unexpectedly). When will such a miracle happen? Even hereditary fortune tellers will not be able to tell you the exact date!
What not to do
Has your loved one learned of a serious offense? What should you not do in such a situation? Of course, there is no need to conflict, react to abuse, or make retaliatory accusations. You should not justify yourself, because this will only show your weakness. A new lie can send a deceived lover into a state of rage, so this too should be avoided.
And right now we propose to talk about how to regain a guy’s trust after a lie, maintain relationships and improve them.
Examples of letters to a man
When writing a farewell note to your beloved guy, you should take into account not only general recommendations, but also the individual characteristics of the person to whom the letter is addressed. Try to anticipate the reaction to your message so that the breakup causes as little pain as possible for both you and the man.
“Hello, Lekha! The other day I found out that after you went into the army, you please not only me, but also Vika, your neighbor, with messages. She herself showed your tender letters. I didn’t say that you were sending similar letters to another girl. I'm not asking you to make a choice. A decent woman is not on her way with a man who is capable of such meanness. Nadia".
whom you love
“Dear Andryusha! I made a difficult decision for myself to break up with you. Not easy because I still love you. However, we cannot be together. You want me to remain a housewife and devote myself only to washing and cooking dinners. Meanwhile, I have a higher education and unfulfilled ambitions. I want to make a career as a lawyer, perhaps open my own business. You don't respect me as a person, you laugh at my desires.
We could become a wonderful married couple and start our own business. But you are not used to seeing a woman as a person equal to yourself. I hope you meet your housewife who will cook borscht for you. Still loving you Anya.”
who offended
“Hello, Yura! I am forced to write you a letter because I am afraid to be alone with you. This is not the first time you have raised your hand against me. You have always received forgiveness for your inappropriate behavior. I never contacted the police. I won’t do this now. Somewhere deep down I still love you. But I don't want to be your girlfriend anymore. Kate".
which changed
"Dear Alex! This time I decided to leave forever. I'm tired of your endless apologies and promises not to cheat anymore. Last week you cheated with my best friend. This is a double betrayal. Don't try to deny, I read your correspondence on your phone. I know that reading someone else’s correspondence is not good, but your behavior has always forced me to do so. Now let Galka tolerate your betrayals. Good luck to both of you. Zhanna."
“Nikolai! You and I broke up over a year ago, and I wasn't kidding when I said I didn't want to see you anymore. I don't like greedy men. Your greed knows no bounds. You never made dates in a restaurant, never gave flowers or gifts, pretended that you forgot about my birthday. You reproached him for buying cosmetics and shoes.
How to maintain trust
Now that you know how to regain a guy's trust, let's talk about how to keep it. The first thing to remember is that you cannot manipulate the feelings and trust of your lover. Try your best to avoid breaking the promises you made to him in order to come to reconciliation. Don't start talking about the conflict that happened between you. This will only open up old wounds and cause a new attack of aggression. Show love and affection as much as possible, try to prove to your significant other that serious changes have occurred in you. You must become ideal, caring and attentive, forget about any complaints.
Tell me, have you encountered such a phenomenon as betrayal in a relationship? Or maybe you yourself were the one who deceived your other half? Have you managed to restore the trust of your loved one?
Reveal everything that's hidden
Are you thinking about how to regain the trust of your beloved guy? Give him as much access into your life as possible. He should freely visit the most secret personal corners: messages on the phone, call list, page on social networks. If you decide to be as honest as possible, you still have nothing to hide, and such a bold step will help the guy calm down and lead to the restoration of trust. In addition, over time, the deceived person will understand that regular checks are not necessary at all. And when trust is completely restored, not a trace will remain of them.
Take symbolic actions
What do psychologists advise people who come to them with a desire to survive betrayal or betrayal? The main advice is to pay attention to symbolic actions. It is necessary to do what gave both partners joy when they started dating. For example, you can go for a walk in the park to feed the swans, go to a movie night, go on a picnic, or take a tent and go camping on the weekend. The most important thing is to refrain from making accusations at this time, not to talk about what happened, or better yet not to remember it at all. This will create a lot of positive memories for both partners. A strong emotional shock, which the girl and the guy will perceive as a kind of starting point from which the relationship begins with a clean slate, will not be superfluous. There are a lot of options: you can go on a trip around the world, move to another city or even country.
Farewell letter to a loved one
If a woman decides to say goodbye to her lover, she does not have to organize a last meeting. You can express your intentions in a letter.
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If the reason for the breakup was a new attachment, you should frankly admit it. There is no need to blame yourself, because sometimes a person cannot cope with his feelings. The main thing is not to name names, so that the abandoned man does not start looking for his rival.
It is important to start writing text with a cool head. A letter should not be an outlet for emotions; it has a purpose. To write a good text, you should adhere to the following recommendations:
- 1. To begin with, it is better to write the letter in draft form. After this, you need to think about what points were missed and add the missing details to the main text. It is better to send the message after 1-2 days to make sure that it really contains all the thoughts that need to be conveyed to the man. Otherwise, a lengthy correspondence may begin, and this should not be allowed.
- 2. When writing a note, it is not advisable to use such cliche phrases as “you deserve more”, “we are too different people” and others. Also, there is no need to list all the grievances caused to each other in the past. You need to express your thoughts as clearly and succinctly as possible, without unnecessary emotions.
- 3. The text should not be pretentious. Most men adhere to a rational view of life and such epithets as “wonderful castle” or “lake of love” will not cause anything but bewilderment in a representative of the stronger sex.
- 4. It is worth considering the character of the addressee. If a man is irritated by diminutive words, they should not be used.
- 5. To show your best side, you should make sure that all words are written correctly and there are no typos. Handwriting should be as legible as possible.
