How a woman should behave when her husband cheats on her

Useful tips

In our modern times, cheating on a husband is not such a rare occurrence. Most representatives of the stronger sex consider this to be quite normal and, without a twinge of conscience, cheat on their other halves right and left.

After any betrayal of the husband, family relationships become no longer as stable as before. They become very shaky, even though the husband has changed his behavior and began to behave completely differently.

How to determine if your husband is cheating or not?

Most women are designed in such a way that they are accustomed to looking for reasons for jealousy even where there are absolutely none.

This behavior, as a rule, does not have the best effect on relationships, since a husband, tired of endless nagging, can suddenly leave his restless wife once and for all.

However, there are details by which you can determine whether your husband walks to the left or not. Not noticing such obvious signs will simply be to the detriment of every woman, so take a closer look at them:

1. Constant control by a man and suspicion of her infidelity.

Why is he doing this? As practice shows, a man who cheats on his wife begins to behave the same way towards her, that is, he begins to be pathologically jealous of his wife for every post.

2. If you find that your spouse looks down during a sensitive conversation.

, and answers questions only with the same type of phrases, usually going into a defensive position, then this is also one of the signs that your man is not faithful to you.

3. Another sign is a change in your once active sex life.

If your husband has become somewhat cold towards you, and there has been almost complete calm in intimate matters, and your husband is constantly looking for reasons and denies, avoiding you, it’s time to think carefully about what is happening. Perhaps he really did have another woman on his side.

4. Your spouse began to constantly delete all browser history from his phone

and constantly hides the phone from you? This is another sign that he is hiding something from you. He began using an assistant to remember passwords to log into his pages on the Internet.

Previously, all his social networks were freely accessible and always open, including for you, but now they are not.

And he cannot give a clear answer as to why the husband now began to tinker with passwords.

The husband also began to constantly hold his mobile phone in his hands, not letting it go for a minute, as if he had become an integral part of it: to the toilet, to the kitchen, to the balcony, or to take out the trash.

5. If you suddenly begin to notice

that the husband, instead of sitting in front of the TV in the evenings, began to go to the gym, and also began to shave every day and take care of himself, then this is also worth thinking about. Perhaps he is trying to look good specifically for the new woman.

6. You began to notice that your husband has new words in his vocabulary.

, such brave and completely unusual phrases? Such new expressions could easily have appeared in him from a new passion.

7. If unexpectedly the husband, who devoured your signature and so favorite roll with great pleasure

, suddenly stopped eating it, and the pies dry lonely on the table, it is likely that now he is fed no less tasty in another house.

If your spouse suddenly starts staying late at work, this is not at all a reason to suspect him or panic.

Maybe he really is moving forward in his career or has started devoting much more time to his own business. However, if, lingering like this, your husband does not pick up the phone or respond to SMS, and later, when questioned, avoids direct answers, then you should seriously think about this situation.

Telephone

You can wiretap his phone and monitor his correspondence. Remember that if you are being spied on, you may be breaking the law, especially if your husband is innocent.

What if a young man does not have a computer or the Internet? Oddly enough, this option is also possible. You need to buy a new SIM card and ask someone to call him and ask him to meet. Closer to the appointed time, the jealous woman must “stand guard” in order to be able to observe what is happening.

How do you know if your husband is really cheating?

According to psychologists, these things should not be ignored, but it is better to take a closer look at them:

1. Usually this happens when your partner begins to make scandals for you, provoking you into quarrels in every possible way, accusing you of all the “mortal sins” and far-fetched actions.

Such scandals are created, as a rule, in order to successfully leave the apartment, turn off your mobile phone, and then not talk about where he was at that moment.

2. When the salary began to decrease significantly, or his expenses quickly began to rise.

Note: in order to bring your beloved into the open, it is strictly not recommended to use various listening devices, bugs and other spy accessories. Such actions, as a rule, are resorted to in the most extreme cases, when, for example, a husband threatens his wife or categorically refuses to give her a divorce.

What to do when you know your husband is cheating

Tolerate

You can choose the option for yourself - endure. This usually happens if you love your husband very much and are unable to part with him. Or you are completely dependent on him financially and you don’t have your own home. You will have to be patient, at least until you can support yourself.

Forgive

You can forgive infidelity if it happened once, since it is usually attributed to quarrels in the family or the weakness of the man. But if this becomes a pattern, then think, are you ready to live such a life? After all, even the greatest patience comes to an end sooner or later; in the end, you will still break off such a relationship, only by that time you will be completely exhausted and broken.

First, try to separate for a while, live separately and see how your relationship develops. If the spouse does not intend to take any conciliatory steps towards him, then it is better not to stir up the past, gather all his pride into a fist and let him go on all four sides. If he wants, he will return.

Breake down

If there is no strength or sense to endure constant betrayal, then it is better to end such a relationship once and for all, and simply break up. And when starting new ones, you should take into account all the mistakes made and try not to repeat them again.

Maintaining dignity...

It is important to maintain dignity in any situation. For example, if you find out about infidelity, do not try to meet his mistress. This is one of the most common and fatal mistakes that many women make. Rise above this, and, first of all, for your own sake, so that later you can respect yourself for your strength of character and fortitude. This will give you additional strength in life.

If you decide that you are ready to stay in a relationship after cheating, then you must forgive your husband completely and irrevocably, without reminding him of this mistake at every opportunity. Otherwise, your spouse will constantly regret that he chose you, and this could end very sadly.

Don't forget about yourself. If you are the victim of cheating, focus on your health. Women who have deeply experienced pain often begin to get sick, especially in the gynecological part. You need to find the strength to withstand this blow and remain attractive and healthy. Be in public more often to take your mind off dark thoughts and forget about them at least for a while.

What absolutely should not be done when you find out that your husband is cheating

Suffer

You should not pretend to be a victim and constantly keep silent about the fact that you are aware of the betrayal. Having, for example, a weak psyche, you can torment yourself to such an extent that health problems may even begin, including prolonged depression.

Complain

If you start complaining to everyone, then your relatives, friends and other “well-wishers” may advise you of various nonsense, for example, to cut off from the shoulder and file for divorce without finding out all the circumstances and reasons. After all, you need to take into account that the people to whom you complain will definitely be on your side, which means they will not be able to assess this situation objectively.

Article information

This article was produced by our experienced team of editors and researchers, who reviewed it for accuracy and comprehensiveness.

Category: Relationship problems

In other languages:

English: Get Your Partner to Admit to Cheating, Português: Fazer o Seu Companheiro Admitir uma Traição, Español: hacer que tu pareja admita que es infiel, Italiano: Indurre il Tuo Partner ad Ammettere che Ti Tradisce, Français: faire pour que son conjoint avoue son infidélité, Deutsch: Deinen Partner dazu bringen, Untreue zu gestehen, Nederlands: Je partner laten toegeven dat hij of zij je bedriegt, ไทย: ทำให้คนรักยอมรับ ว่าเขานอกใจ, Tiếng Việt: Đối phương thú nhận việc ngoại tình, 中文: 让伴侣承认出轨, العربية: جعل شريك حياتك يعترف بخيانته

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Revenge

You must understand that now the main thing is to concentrate on the relationship with your husband, determine the reasons that led to this result and try to patch up the holes in them, and not think about your rival or the place with her. Never compare yourself to her and don’t even think about dating her. This chance will give her some advantage over you.

Throwing tantrums

If you make a scandal and throw tantrums at your husband, then such destructive behavior will definitely lead to an inevitable breakup. Even if you are in unbearable pain, still try to talk to him calmly, without presenting any ultimatums to him.

Feel sorry for yourself

If you begin to feel constant pity for yourself, then this will be the most terrible thing that can ever happen. Try to be an independent and self-sufficient woman, one with whom a man can overcome any obstacles. It is precisely such women that attract men, and not whiny ladies, as is usually thought. Therefore, wipe away your tears and never show them to your man.

Results

Should you know about cheating? Maybe it’s better to leave everything at the stage of doubt? In fact, all psychologists unanimously declare that there is no more destructive feeling than jealousy. And before you find out about your partner’s cheating, you should delve into yourself and understand why you need this.

If her fears are confirmed, it will be terribly difficult for the girl: she will have to make a choice between trampling on her pride and saving her family. If the desire to find out the truth prevails, then we have told you several ways that will help you find out everything you need.

How to behave for a woman whose husband cheats on her, but does not leave the family

© Joaquin Corbalan/Getty Images

Cheating on your husband is a huge challenge for any woman.

If your husband continues to lie to you even after his infidelity has been completely proven, you must adhere to some specific rules:

1. Try to convey to your beloved

that a lie can destroy everything and this is not a clear foundation that can withstand any test of strength.

2. Explain to your spouse that the crisis you have experienced related to infidelity can sometimes even strengthen the relationship.

According to statistics, most couples who experienced adultery claimed that their relationships became better and stronger.

3. As a rule, most Russian women are accustomed to throwing hysterics with breaking dishes and using obscene language.

These methods usually lead to calm, but only temporary. Usually, the exploits of men after such hysterics only resume with even greater force.

4. Because keeping negativity to yourself is also not worth it

, it is best to give your spouse a thrashing, but in words, carefully choosing each expression behind the stream of abuse, without losing its essence. It is best to clearly and balancedly formulate your claims to him and, as the injured party, put forward a number of your demands to him.

The main thing is to under no circumstances take it out on your children, friends and relatives, since they have absolutely nothing to do with and are not to blame for your spouse’s infidelity.

What to do if the husband walks and does not leave the family?

The answer may seem quite strange, but!

Any wandering husband will be perfectly influenced by a counter lie, which, as if in a mirror, will allow him to look at his own behavior. Moreover, you may not even take revenge on your spouse with some kind of retaliatory betrayal.

It's enough to have a party with your old friends

or even just spend the night with your girlfriend, but when asked where you spent that night, tell the same tales that he usually tells you.

Important! If a woman knows about her husband’s infidelity, but prefers to pretend that this is not happening, due to her cowardice or lack of willpower, then, as a rule, this leads to disastrous consequences and certainly will not help strengthen the marriage bond.

CONSPIRACY

Pay attention to other ways to get your spouse to admit to cheating. Conspiracy is an excellent folk remedy through which you can achieve success. In practical magic there are many conspiracies that will help in such a situation.

To plot against her husband and expose his betrayal. You need to pour water into a pan, light a candle and, holding the candle over the water, say the words: “Candle, burn, strange woman, show yourself.” If the wax in the water takes the shape of a female figure or head, then the fact of adultery has taken place.

Another way to check is to carry out the following ritual: you need to cut a long strip of A4 paper, on which write your name at the top, and below - the name of your spouse and draw a cross under it. Take the wedding ring and let it roll on the paper while you say: “Roll, my ring, choose your favorite heart.”

If the ring reaches your name, this indicates fidelity, and if it hits the cross, then betrayal has occurred. If it went very far, then the betrayal happened more than once.

The behavior of a man after the fact of betrayal or an affair

It is not at all difficult for a man to determine whether a man is cheating on his wife. Moreover, the longer his affair on the side continues, the faster and more successfully he can be identified.

Strange actions

It is impossible not to notice that the man’s behavior becomes completely different. If earlier he scattered his socks around the house, and it was almost impossible to train them to put them in the dirty laundry basket, now he not only throws them in the washing machine, but also carefully hangs them out to dry.

Or another case:

completely unexpectedly, right in the middle of the week, a husband who is very far from romantic relationships suddenly brings a bouquet of gorgeous flowers and your favorite wine after work, although he had never done this before, even on your birthday. Maybe your spouse began to spend more time with you, help you around the house, and even watch movies with you that he didn’t like before.

Unfortunately, these facts may indicate that your man is behaving the way they usually behave after cheating.

Lack of tenderness

Your spouse began to show less and less attention and tenderness to you in private, in an intimate way. Why might this be observed?

As a rule, this happens because a man is tormented by his conscience

and he feels bad about the fact that he betrayed you. This is precisely what can prevent him from getting together at the most crucial moment and being a sincere and affectionate partner with you.

Closedness

After a spouse commits adultery, it can greatly affect his behavior as he is tormented by remorse when he returns home. He may become withdrawn or have a bad mood and all this is the result of some stress and painful experiences.

Therefore, you should be careful with certain conclusions

, because this does not mean at all that your spouse continues to cheat on you.

A man is bored

Being next to you, a man begins to frankly get bored, especially if he has always had fun and at ease with some other woman. And the longer all this continues, the more noticeable the complete indifference towards you will be.

If your spouse is not interested in you at all

, your hobbies or some holidays, it doesn’t hurt to think about what exactly happened. And the whole point is that the man, having probably cheated on you, received a surge of such vivid emotions that he certainly wants to experience again.

He became unstable

After adultery has occurred, your spouse may behave irritably and unrestrainedly towards you. It can start up just like that, out of the blue, and constantly makes various comments to you. Quite often scandals and quarrels began to brew between you.

In this case, there can be only one solution for you

- once again, do not anger your spouse and, having shown the lion’s share of patience towards him, try to behave quite calmly. You can even show all your tenderness, affection and attention. If in this case your husband’s behavior does not change in any way, then he probably has another woman on his side.

Why doesn't he want to discuss what happened?

You are disappointed in your husband. Now you know that he can lie, and masterfully. If earlier you thought that you would recognize a lie, now every word, every look arouses suspicion. It seems to you that he is cunning, like a spy, and insensitive, like a surgeon. But this is not true.

Yes, I have met super conniving, hypocritical men with a complete lack of shame and morality. In my statistics there are 1 in 30 people. Therefore, most likely your husband is an ordinary person. He also has a soul, feelings that obey generally accepted morality.

Men, in principle, process everything differently. Not because they are insensitive blockheads, but because in our culture it is generally not customary to endow men with emotionality, so any manifestation of “un-male” emotion is condemned by everyone. Especially men themselves, if they find this emotion within themselves. I'll explain now.

The traitor (not one of the 1 in 30) feels:

Guilt (he understands that you had a hard time)
Sympathy (the wife’s tear-stained eyes, the smell of valerian in the apartment - clearly about the fact that someone is feeling bad here)
Shame (the notorious “I realized my mistake”)
Doubt (do you remember that cheating is a symptom of a relationship disease? The relationship will not be cured by just returning the husband to the family)
Fear (what if you are now going to torment him with constant reproaches, reminders of the baseness of his act? Or his mistress will harass, persecute, and will not give life to anyone)

Do you think he needs your support?

Oh, what are you talking about! I offer my help in such a situation, you once again emphasize - “ You are a weakling!” You can’t deal with your cockroaches yourself!”

Maybe, maybe. Just give it a deadline.

But he won’t understand it the way you do.

How should a woman behave?

If it so happens that you are left alone, then perhaps it’s time to do a lot of internal work on yourself.

First of all, you need to accept your pain. Let all your negative emotions come out in any way you can. This will allow you to pacify them later. And this will be the beginning of your new journey.
Concentrate completely on something positive, drive away all resentments and thoughts, both about your rival and any negativity in general, try to completely let go of the resentment. Try to forgive your offenders. This is very difficult, but also very important, first of all for you.
Try to continue to live a full life no matter what. Play sports, go for a walk for a fresh break, meet friends and enjoy life.
Don't make excuses for your husband's behavior. Just accept what happened. This is what your experience in life should have been. You got it, now move on to get a new one and don't think about anything.

As soon as you feel the strength to live on, break off or restore the relationship, everything will immediately go as it should.

Important advice from psychologists on what to do for a woman who has experienced infidelity

Start improving your self-esteem. After all, if a woman does not love herself, no man will ever love her. You need to start respecting yourself, pampering and cherishing yourself. Buy yourself a new dress or shoes, ring or underwear. For better results, you can wear new things even at home.
Clean up your head. Seriously. Start putting things in order there. First, you need to at least talk to someone. This doesn't mean you need to complain or vent. No. Just talk to a good person about your plans, your interests, or just about the weather.
In every situation you can find some advantages. Try to find them here too. Perhaps you have been wanting to renovate for a long time? Great. Now you have a lot of time for this. Start actively moving furniture with your husband, tear off old wallpaper. Joint work ennobles and brings people together.

Social networks and email

If your husband cheats but does not confess, you can teach him a lesson and check him through social networks. By registering under someone else’s name and choosing a beautiful photo of another woman, you need to start corresponding with your husband.

You can learn a lot of new things about yourself, so think about it - do you need it?

Almost everyone now has a mailbox, and more than one. This is an easy way to check if a guy is cheating. You need to create a secret mailbox with a fictitious e-mail. And then, one evening, send the chosen one, whom you doubt, by e-mail a letter with the following content:

“I still remember our last meeting... And you?” or “I really miss your hands and eyes, shall we meet?”

If a guy continues to correspond, but does not say anything about it, this is already 50% of the fact that betrayal is possible on his part.