Sooner or later, any woman wonders how to keep a man. Most often, this question arises when a turning point is approaching in a relationship, and the feelings of a loved one gradually begin to fade away. You can regain your former passion, but you will have to work on yourself and the relationship in general. There is no universal way to breathe new life into communication with a man. But there is no need to fall into despair and put into practice all the advice of friends and dubious specialists. You should always look for the main reason in yourself.
But does it make sense
No matter how strong and stable a couple’s relationship may seem, there is always a risk that another trouble or quarrel will cause a breakup. Lovers often quarrel due to misunderstandings and take offense at each other even without a serious reason. But not everyone can take a step towards reconciliation.
Often women wait for a man to take the initiative for reconciliation; they are guided by the principle: if he loves, then he must apologize. But it is very easy to hurt a man’s pride; even a minor reason can cause feelings to cool. There may also be a situation where a guy has been waiting for a long time for a reason to break off the relationship, but was afraid to do it himself.
Each situation needs to be analyzed individually, but all women should adhere to the following recommendations before doing so:
- do not hurry;
- be honest with yourself;
- think about the reciprocity of feelings.
To make a man think about the feasibility of a relationship, a woman can put into practice a number of special tricks, as well as adhere to the recommendations of psychologists in order to bind her lover more closely to herself.
In some cases, the opposite method works: a man falls in love more if a woman keeps him at some distance. Many ladies very successfully use this technique if they want to receive something material from their chosen one: a new thing, jewelry, even a car or an apartment. But to pull this off, you need a strong desire, as well as the ability to manipulate your partner’s feelings.
If a man is interested, keeping him at a distance is convenient. Representatives of the stronger sex are hunters by nature; if they have to woo a woman, they only fall in love more. But there is always a risk of “overstaying it,” which will cause men’s interest to completely fade away and the relationship to come to an end.
It’s worth figuring out whether you should try to keep a man close. To answer this question, you will have to think carefully, list all the reasons why you can do this, and also carefully analyze the situation that has arisen, weighing all the positive and negative aspects of the existing relationship. Perhaps all the manipulations are not worth it for the guy to stay around. It is very important here not to be led by emotions or desires alone, but to include logic.
Love at a distance
There is a widespread belief that it is almost impossible to remain faithful to your partner from a distance. However, if you understand the essence of the problem well, then the chances of betrayal become minimal.
Psychologists have some useful tips to answer the question of how to keep a man’s interest at a distance:
Communicate with your spouse more often. Tell him about events in your life, be interested in the state of his affairs, remind him of how you are waiting for him.- At the same time, there is no need to impose. Calling a hundred times a day to remind yourself is a bad idea. This behavior causes irritation and hostility.
- You need to trust your partner. By constantly checking and hinting at possible betrayal, you insult him or even provoke him.
- Learn to wait. Spend your free time on yourself. Read books, sign up for some courses. Take care of your own health, maintain your tone. All this will lead to the fact that when your loved one returns, he will be pleasantly pleased with the changes that have happened to you.
Separation with true love only makes the relationship stronger. The lovers yearn for each other and constantly remember events from the past. Their absorption in their inner world does not allow them to pay attention to outside temptations and lose interest.
Reasons for fear of relationships in men
Why are men so afraid of serious relationships? In fact, there are several reasons, but each of them leaves a serious imprint on the male psyche:
- Bad experience, unhappy love. You can’t rush into a relationship if the guy just recently went through a breakup with his ex. It is better to unobtrusively ask him how he got out of this situation in order to assess how deep the mental wound is.
- A distorted view of family life. It is formed if there was a previous marriage that ended in a painful divorce. Perhaps his parents went through this. In such cases, the man is convinced that marriage spoils the relationship. A woman faces a serious problem: how to destroy this illusion, to prove to her beloved that life together can be happy if both begin to work on it.
- The image of a bachelor in the media, culture, and advertising is always presented favorably. A free man lives cheerfully, carefree, no one spoils his mood with or without reason. A playboy always has a lot of fans, but there are no obligations or responsibilities. Of course, such a world looks attractive. The main task of a woman who falls in love with a convinced bachelor is to convince him, to show him that there is an even more beautiful world of love and harmony that will help him find true happiness.
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How can you keep a man
It is interesting that at the beginning of a relationship, a woman always convinces a man that he is the most beloved, desired and intelligent for her, better than anyone in the world. This may only be partly true, but a man really feels like this while his beloved tells him about it. Therefore, it is important not to forget about this over time.
Looking for an answer to the question of how to keep a husband, many women are afraid to show themselves weak and defenseless. The other half doesn’t need to know how his beloved can cope with even the most difficult situations. It is often better to show your weakness so that a man feels that he is strong and can protect and help.
An affectionate, gentle and kind woman will always attract you. There is already too much evil, selfishness and cruelty in the world, so such qualities in a person are admired.
There is one little trick that every girl needs to remember: even if the desire of a guy or man corresponds to her hidden desire, she should try to pretend as if she does not want this at all, but is only giving in for his sake. In this case, the man perceives this concession as a real reward.
Psychologists recommend taking note of one more piece of advice: if your feelings have subsided a little, you should never blame a man for that. It is especially dangerous to tell him: “You don’t love me anymore!” It is with these words that a man can be convinced that this is indeed the case. You need to do the opposite and say more often: “You love me as before!”
It is always more difficult for a man to be the first to reconcile, since it is difficult for him to show what he thinks is weakness. A reasonable woman always understands this and is the first to begin reconciliation.
When thinking about how to keep a guy, girls often forget that they always need to maintain some kind of mystery, a riddle. Excessive openness only harms relationships. You should not allow a man to think that he knows his chosen one completely.
Behavior algorithms
A woman’s behavior when she wants to keep a man close to her is determined by the situation. Much depends on the guy’s social status, whether he is single or married, how old he is, whether he lives nearby or not. Also, a situation often arises when a couple has a child, then they will have to behave completely differently.
General advice from psychology that will be useful to a woman in any situation is as follows:
- Reproaches, jealousy, criticism and attacks will only darken a relationship that is already bursting at the seams. Any problem that arises should be solved calmly, without unnecessary emotions and hysterics. The best solution is a compromise so that everyone's interests are taken into account. You won’t go far without trust, so suspicion and jealousy should not appear without a serious reason, otherwise the man will quickly become indifferent.
- Your mood and appearance should always be at their best. No one likes to see next to them an always gloomy and unkempt young lady in a stretched tracksuit. A man needs to be convinced that a woman lives a rich and interesting life, while always maintaining a certain mystery.
- Down with restrictions on his personal freedom. This does not mean that you can openly allow him to meet others. But the presence of boundaries is necessary; the main thing is to ensure that love and care do not transform into obsession and total control.
- From time to time you need to maintain distance in a relationship. Nothing bad will happen if you leave a call unanswered a couple of times or refuse a meeting under a convenient pretext. This way the man will see that the woman’s personal life is not focused on him alone, and as a result, he will show more interest in her person.
- Demonstrating female attractiveness will help keep a man's attention. You need to be confident in your own beauty and hone your femininity. Let the guys on the street turn around after such a girl. Light flirting is welcome. But it is important not to overdo it, otherwise everything can turn into an outbreak of jealousy and scandal.
Let the man be given the role of leader in communication. It is necessary to reserve for him the right to make serious decisions and show concern. Even if he is wrong, you should not state it head-on, you need to unobtrusively make it clear what he is wrong about. At the same time, the guy must be sure that he came to such conclusions on his own.
When a man is married
Relationships with a married man rarely lead to good results. But if, nevertheless, a woman does not see her life without him, she will have to show willpower, act decisively, and be completely confident in her actions.
There is no need to try to replace his wife. Washing, cooking, cleaning await him at home, and he comes to his mistress to rest, relax, and escape from everyday problems. A woman should look good, be gentle and friendly.
It’s worth being emotional and romantic, demonstrating to a man that you don’t need anything from him except the opportunity to give him your love. At the same time, you need to show moderate care and remain a reliable friend.
Hysterics will only push the guy away. He is married, you need to understand that circumstances can change at any moment. If he suddenly cancels the meeting, it is best to react calmly and be understanding.
Constant whining and complaints about lack of attention will not help keep a married man next to you. When a woman starts a relationship with such a person, she should immediately be prepared for the fact that she will have to spend weekends, holidays and even ordinary evenings alone. What is the point of reproaching an unfree loved one for being with his family at this time? The wife will always be a priority.
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You shouldn’t get used to such relationships, because they can end at any moment. Otherwise, separations will bring a lot of suffering, resentment will grow, which is why scandals will inevitably begin to occur. The man is fed up with this at home; he doesn’t need to organize Egyptian executions when he just wants to relax.
If he is younger
If the guy is younger, common hobbies, sharing interests, as well as constant work on oneself will help to keep him. A woman must keep herself in good physical shape so that her lover does not stare at younger girls. The beauty of a woman, both physical and spiritual, means a lot. You need to constantly work on this in order to attract a young man and remain interesting to him.
Love at a distance
It is difficult to keep the man you love if he permanently lives in another city or country. But nothing is impossible, because we live in an age of high technology, which greatly simplifies communication. To maintain the interest of a man with whom you cannot yet be close, you will have to regularly reinforce his feelings.
There is no need to be too dramatic about separation; let it be regarded as a way to ensure the sincerity and depth of feelings.
It is imperative to maintain constant contact, try to talk more often, share experiences, events of the day, news. Also, don’t forget to ask how he’s doing. But here it is important to adhere to certain limits and not to impose. Constant calls and messages are distracting and annoying. It is best to make video calls a couple of times a day. Maintaining eye contact is mandatory.
Jealousy is inevitable. But in order to keep it under control, you should discuss in advance with your beloved man that the relationship is based on trust. It will help you not to commit rash acts. You always need to tell each other the truth, the deception will still be revealed sooner or later, and then the relationship will inevitably fall apart.
It is very important that the connection is not only virtual. Personal meetings are necessary, even if they are short. A bright date filled with positive emotions will only strengthen the connection. And it’s easier to cope with separation, knowing that there will be a new meeting soon.
Have a common child
Having a child together does not guarantee that a man will remain close forever, no matter how much his girlfriends convince him otherwise. Often a woman decides to give birth when she feels that divorce is inevitable or, conversely, in order to marry a man. You can't blackmail a guy as a child.
Children can be a manipulative tool in a woman’s hands, but a number of nuances must be taken into account so that the loved one does not try to hide behind the horizon at any opportunity.
You cannot use a child as a reason to return a departed man. This will only demonstrate female selfishness. You need to let your loved one know that you can cope without him. If you are pregnant, you should simply report it without expecting anything. If a guy values relationships, he himself will begin to take action, because his pride will be hurt, and if not, then it is better to break up with him as quickly as possible.
Forcing a child will further push the man away from the woman. In extreme cases, his attitude towards the child will worsen, and it is vile to deprive the child of his father. It is immoral to try to manipulate the feelings and personality of a lover - this will only destroy his life. You should not act against the will of a man; it is better to let go if the feelings are sincere.
Trying to manipulate a partner with the help of a child, a woman often forgets about the baby itself. You need to understand that if pregnancy occurred as a result of a casual relationship, it is unlikely that the guy will experience love towards the offspring. He may remain in the family, but he will be guided only by a sense of duty, and not by love. Is it worth raising a child in such conditions, without fatherly love and care?
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Before you try to keep a guy in a relationship as a child, you should think carefully about whether it is worth solving problems in this way. When a guy leaves a girl, something doesn’t suit him, the baby won’t correct the situation. You need to work on yourself.
How to drive a man crazy
Are you starting to feel like your man is losing interest in you? Does he sometimes ignore your calls and messages? How attentive is he to you?
Or do you often ask yourself if he is still in love with you or has lost interest in you?
So, how can you make a man lose his head? Of course, we are talking about madness in the good sense of the word.
The main rule: do not pretend to be someone you essentially are not. And, of course, there are some psychological techniques that will help women always remain loved and desired.
Pay attention to the following points that even psychologists talk about:
Some women's advice
Women who have experience of successful relationships behind them are advised to adhere to the following model of behavior when communicating with a man:
- Criticism is excluded.
- Avoid tears in front of a man.
- Anyone can get tired of whining with or without reason.
- Do not start serious conversations about relationships unless necessary.
- Do not forbid a man to spend time with friends and have fun.
- Total control will scare anyone away.
- Refusal of intimacy is unacceptable without serious reasons.
- Ridicule and offensive nicknames are repulsive.
- Trying to put a man on a diet will make him unhappy.
Be interesting and mysterious
You always need to maintain male interest while remaining mysterious to your partner. The presence of a secret in a woman excites the male imagination. This could be constant reincarnation, a change of images, hobbies, a varied menu, or offers of unusual leisure activities. In front of such a lady, no man will remain indifferent.
Figure
Watching your figure is vital. No man will like it if his woman is out of shape and the excess weight is very noticeable. This does not mean that you need to lose weight to the point of anorexia. Many people like the pleasant fullness. But it should be just pleasant fullness, and not fat hanging down in rolls that even clothing does not hide.
It’s worth going to the gym, swimming pool, and mastering active recreation. It’s good if a man himself shares this: going to the gym together, skiing, biking or jogging will only strengthen the connection.
Don't press him
It is useless to put pressure on a man. Excessive intrusiveness and increased attention by representatives of the stronger sex are perceived as attempts at control. He will run away from such a woman without looking back. Constant presence nearby, attempts to violate his personal space without invitation will only scare him away. Men don’t like it when the “prey” falls into their hands. More precisely, they love, but they quickly lose interest in such ladies.
Just like his mother3
If everything is quite simple with friends, then you will almost certainly have to build a relationship with his mother. And every mother wishes for her beloved boy the most intelligent, beautiful, modest, well-mannered, gentle, honest, blameless... And you are unlikely to be the living embodiment of her fantasies. Alas, there is no universal recipe in this situation.
But even if your relationship with his mother does not work out, do not forget that you have one advantage. For a mother, her adult son always remains a child, and she is sure that she understands life better than him and knows what he needs better than himself. But having made a choice in your favor, the man has already made an adult and independent decision.
And if you consider him not a helpless child, but an independent and adult man, you will always be looked at in a favorable light. “Yes, mom is right, this girl is not the most ideal, not a supermodel, not a princess, and did not defend two doctoral dissertations, but she makes me a man,” your chosen one thinks and hurries from mom into your arms.
Turning to the powers of magic
In extreme cases, a woman can resort to white magic rituals. But this is worth doing only if all “legal” methods have been tried and have not brought results. There are a great many conspiracies and rituals for love, return or attachment of a man. They are all effective in their own way, but you need to be prepared for the consequences. Fate doesn't like it when people interfere with its course.
It is best not to practice divination on your own, but to turn to specialists. First, you can go to a fortune teller, who will predict whether this relationship is possible in principle or whether there is no chance. If a woman wants to keep a man with her, she can turn to sorcerers who will perform the appropriate rituals. But you need to understand that there are no guarantees. Still, it’s worth working on yourself better - this is a more effective way, although it requires time and effort.
Whether or not to keep a man next to you depends on many factors. If the feelings are strong and sincere, then the answer is “yes.” The woman will have to work on the situation, understand why her lover’s interest began to disappear. If you identify the reasons and do everything to eliminate irritating factors, the man himself will not want to leave.
How to fall in love with a man
Always be yourself
DanilNevsky / pixabay
The first and most important rule is not to appear to be someone you are not.
It may be an overused cliché, but if this advice still works, then it's probably the truest one, right?
Be yourself.
In any case, if you want your man to not lose interest in you, you must fully accept yourself for who you are, and be this person not only when you are next to him, but throughout life in general.
Men are quite simple creatures, primitive in some ways, but by no means stupid. Therefore, they can easily recognize feigned behavior and sense a lie.
You shouldn’t pretend and try on other people’s masks. You don't have to try to pretend to be someone you're not, and you don't have to worry about if you have any flaws because everyone has them!
Important tips for all women
© Ibrahim Asad/ Pexels
1. Usually a man is forced to constantly think about himself by that woman.
, who is minding her own business, doesn’t wait for his call and doesn’t really miss him. She is completely absorbed in her own affairs, which can distract her from the man.
2. Men prefer those women who do not get into their personal space.
When meetings are casual, the man feels complete freedom of action, completely calmly understanding that a woman can also be completely free at this time. This will make a man think about the woman and care for her.
3. Never run after a man while showing off your beautiful self.
Better than that, from time to time you can send your man a message that can be a kind of poke. The main thing here is to choose the right time to remind yourself and make sure that this does not happen during his work meeting. It is enough to simply wish the man a good day, while hinting that you do not mind communicating in person.
4. Give your man a small gift from yourself.
, which can, for example, be hung on your hand. This could be some kind of keychain for your phone. Or you can put your photo in his wallet. You can also give your man a cup of coffee and then he will start his every morning thinking about you.
5. You can also make a man think about you more often
, if you come up with a specific word that will make him switch to you all the time. For example, after a romantic dinner and a night spent together, you can tell your man that it was great. After which this word needs to be used more often, for example, on the phone to casually clarify that today is just a great morning. Or use this key in an SMS message. Even after hearing this word from someone else, the man will immediately return mentally to you.
But when using this method there is one important condition. It is necessary to repeat this magic word at least seven times in order for the method to work. In normal conversation, try not to use this code word.
6. Everyone knows the trick in stores or supermarkets,
when the smells of tangerines are released into the premises. We immediately begin to assume that the smell of tangerines is directly related to the New Year. In connection with this, we immediately begin to purchase much more goods than we planned.
Therefore, determine for yourself some unique aroma of perfume or oil that a man will associate exclusively with you. In order to enhance this effect, you can even put an aroma lamp in the bedroom. But choose the scent carefully so that your man doesn’t get a headache from it.
When you are in the bedroom and you are wearing this perfume, try not to conflict or quarrel with the man in order to enhance the positive effect. Your pleasant smell should always evoke only positive emotions.
7. If you keep touching the same place
(elbow, neck) for a man, at the moment when he experiences strong positive emotions (happiness, joy, laughter), this will make him think about you more often. It is enough to simply touch your hand to a certain place and hold it for a few seconds.
In order for a habit to develop, there must be at least 30 such touches. Such management of emotions will give him the understanding that being with you is very good and carefree. This method will put a man in a good mood, even if he was furious before.
8. Try to find a common hobby with your chosen one
. This could be watching some new movie that was released at the box office or collecting things, or maybe it would even be fishing. Any joint hobby can bring you closer together, and in the future, as soon as a man encounters this activity again, he will certainly remember you.
9. Try to make friends with his friends,
because when you become “one of our own” in this team, your task will be greatly simplified. After all, now his friends will constantly remind him of you.
10. If you make it a rule constantly
leaving cute notes with pleasant words or messages in the morning wishing him good morning in the pockets of his clothes, then this will evoke the most tender feelings in a man, even if he does not at all look like a romantic. This will take very little time, but a man will constantly have your image in his mind, and pleasant thoughts about you will warm his soul.
11. Never, under any circumstances, compare
your man with no one, don’t try to change him in any way, just love him for who he is. You must be able to restrain yourself and your emotions, even if there is some reason.
Always show in public that you are a couple: affectionate touches, a gentle look or an imperceptible hug - all this will speak of sincere love that is difficult to hide. In this case, your man will very soon believe you and understand that in this life he only needs you.
- Change your lifestyle
You have started a new serious relationship, invaded someone’s familiar world, which means you should change your life a little, adapt to the life of your chosen one. At a minimum, you need to understand and accept your boyfriend’s lifestyle, you need to sacrifice something, changing your life and adapting to him. At the same time, try to change your boyfriend’s habits very carefully; guys perceive very negatively all attempts to fit into their familiar world. This is the essence of a relationship, two characters get used to each other, changing their lives and their habits.
To keep in good shape or to manipulate: the differences between the two concepts
Some representatives of the weak half of humanity resort to the art of manipulation, pursuing their own selfish goals. The guy is regarded as a means to achieve them. In most cases, this form of using a person is closely related to material enrichment or the desire to raise social status in society. There is no point in applying pressure, even if it initially brings benefits.
Another thing is to keep a man on his toes in a relationship. Don’t let yourself get bored, keep your distance and don’t tolerate obscene, unacceptable behavior on the part of your partner.
Is it worth keeping a man?
Psychologists say that if a man himself wants to leave and shows persistence in doing so, then there is no point in keeping him. It will be a waste of time, effort, nerves and energy. If there is no love or common ground in a relationship for a long time, then the true reason for trying to keep your partner is self-pity, fear of the unknown and resentment that the best years of your life were wasted.
There is also one more point to consider. Practice shows that a man who is in a long-term relationship with a woman rarely decides to leave. If this happens, the reasons are:
- The woman simply brought him to this point with her nagging or attitude.
- A new love appeared in his life.
In the second case, there is nothing special to advise, since with your struggle you can only show a man his significance and importance. There is no point in being afraid of parting with someone who does not appreciate, love, or respect. If a man has made his final decision, it is difficult to stop him, since such a step is also not easy, requiring long hours of thought.
In the first case, all is not lost. If you catch yourself in time and grab your head, the relationship can be saved. We must learn to talk about our feelings, seek compromises and try to behave wisely.