So that the wife wants a husband. Marital duty and legal grounds
Wife to husband: “I’m leaving you.”
Husband in panic: “I’m with you!”
We know everything, we can do everything. If something is wrong, we’ll figure it out ourselves, our bedroom is our own business. No one will tell you anything new; it’s sex in both Africa and the Soviet Union. As he was a duty to his spouse, he will remain so, from generation to generation. What is an orgasm? Probably the wife knows. What if you ask her?
What is “marital duty”, and how to fulfill it with a guarantee of quality?
Some men are sure that the bonds of marriage include the obligation of fidelity and monogamous sex with a partner ordered by law (and even God, it’s more reliable). But what if your wife doesn’t want sex? He is in no hurry to fulfill his duty. Why does attraction disappear when the wife is dissatisfied with her husband and constantly clings to the financial component of family ties?
How not to lose your family if your wife doesn’t have enough money and is disappointed? He doesn’t want to support, he reproaches. read more.
subscribe.ru
Tease her5
Don't get straight to the point, tease her so that the anticipation turns her on even more. But don't take too long a break between oral sex and actual sexual intercourse. Moving on to the main part, you should not immediately use any special, for example, rough techniques, or immediately move on to the final part. Try to prolong the pleasure.
After you've had oral sex, it doesn't take long for her to reach climax, but don't rush it. Observe her reaction, as soon as you realize that she is almost ready, stop, take a short break and then continue. Repeat this part several times until she begins to demand that you be more active and not stop.
We find out why a wife may not want intimacy with her husband, and what to do about it
Photo from the site: womanadvice.ru
Any person, even a small child, knows for sure that family happiness is made up not only of love, but also of other factors that must be taken into account, although it should never be discounted. In addition to love and affection, there must, of course, be mutual understanding, as well as mutual respect, and it is hardly possible to do without regular sexual contacts. Often newlyweds are full of enthusiasm and optimism, and believe that they do not have problems in the sexual sphere, and there simply cannot be any, but after some time it turns out that the wife does not want a husband, and what to do with such “joy” of the second half is completely incomprehensible. Life regularly presents us with such surprises, and so that they do not come as a surprise to us, and also in order to solve the problem as painlessly as possible, this article is intended.
Is it possible to prepare a female pathogen at home?
Can! You just need to choose the most suitable option for yourself, because there are a huge variety of these same pathogens and there is also a whole sea of ways to prepare them.
Note that if you decide to prepare a libido stimulant at home, it is very important to pay attention and be careful with the dosage and the ingredients themselves.
So, we will offer several options for very effective stimulants and the conditions under which they perform their functions best.
Before morning sex, you should drink tea with ginger and lemon. It’s especially nice if your partner brings this tea straight to bed.
A more serious pathogen is a tincture called “Spanish Fly”. This remedy has been known since the times of the musketeers. In this case, it is extremely important to follow the instructions for preparation and administration, since the product is poisonous and should never be taken uncontrollably.
Let us note another stimulant of female libido, which may sound somewhat unusual - the testicles of a young sheep, fried with onions. It may not be particularly easy to obtain such an ingredient as lamb testicles, but the effectiveness of the product is extremely high!
Less exotic aphrodisiac dishes: sesame oil with honey and artichoke in olive oil are easy to prepare, and the effect will be noticeable after a quarter of an hour.
Note that food is only part of the romantic mood. No less attention should be paid to the romantic atmosphere in general and intimate caresses.
Short answer:
Quite a lot of married couples face problems of this kind. Someone among the stronger sex complains that his wife is cold in bed. And the woman at that time may consider herself not sexy enough, and such thoughts can subsequently lead to complexes. Someone may have a lover due to some problems in their sex life with their husband. One way or another, there is a problem and it needs to be solved, regardless of why this happened. You shouldn’t guess, but it’s better to just talk to your wife. Perhaps this will help you resolve this situation.
Massage with erotic elements
Touching allows you to learn secrets about a woman’s individual erogenous zones. In order to leave a pleasant feeling, it is recommended to do a massage in an appropriate atmosphere. Dim lighting and relaxing music will help create it. Important recommendations and procedures:
- Hands should be warm. Treat them with moisturizer.
- Massage your neck with soft touches, then slowly move to your back.
- The area between the shoulder blades requires special attention, massage it gently and smoothly.
- Go down to your waist and buttocks. There is a large amount of soft tissue on the buttocks. Stimulation here can be intense: rubbing, patting.
- Lightly stroke down the back of your thighs to your feet. Their massage will not only relieve fatigue, but also ignite the fire of passion.
- Pay attention to your breasts and nipples. This is one of the strong erogenous zones.
- Accompany your touches with kisses, so you can quickly achieve the desired effect.
- When the woman's desire is obvious, move on to genital massage.
- If the woman is not yet excited enough, you can repeat all the manipulations from bottom to top.
During an erotic massage, focus on your partner’s sensations to determine what she liked most and what was less pleasant. Experiment so you can learn how to excite your wife.
Life, life and life again4
It also often happens that at first, in the heat of love, a woman wanted to make love and everything suited her, but then the rose-colored glasses fell off, and along with them, sexual activity began to decline, because now she, exhausted after work, needs a little more time for full excitement.
And if the husband arouses him, but does not follow through, what then? Going for a bath in the middle of the night or trying to fall asleep with a heaviness in your lower abdomen? Yes, the options are not very good. So such a wife decides to refuse her life partner as much as possible until it becomes unbearable.
The most famous effective stimulants for women
The most effective and powerful sexual stimulants for the fair sex, according to experts and patients who have tried them, are: Silver Fox, Spanish Fly and Viagra.
These drugs have a minimal set of side effects and contraindications. In addition, they are distinguished by a complete absence of taste and smell.
The drug Silver Fox or (Silver Fox) is a stimulant, which, among other things, is also based on components of vitamins, adaptogens and aphrodisiacs. The drug is extremely effective, but it should be taken according to a strictly prescribed dosage. Has a very fast response time. The pathogen has a direct effect on the body for at least five hours.
We wrote about the Spanish fly and Viagra above, but we still note that it is not for nothing that these drugs enjoy enormous authority among other drugs, because their effect has been tested by millions of women around the world!
Reasons for wife's loss of sexual interest
There are many reasons why your wife may be cold towards you. This situation requires careful analysis to identify the true cause. You can contact a psychologist if you cannot cope with this problem yourself. But you should not conflict and complain about your wife, this can lead to a break in your relationship. And so, more about the reasons:
- Pregnancy . During the period of bearing a child, both partners are forced to adhere to some restrictions in family life. Also, the period is quite intense for both spouses emotionally. If your wife refuses you intimate intimacy, you should not treat this as just another whim; in fact, there are situations when having sex is prohibited. You don't want to harm your own wife, do you? Therefore, this period will require loyalty and tolerance from you. The lady’s libido also plays an important role; perhaps it is reduced now and she simply does not want to have sexual contact with you. Unfortunately, this happens often, and nothing can be done about it.
- Lack of any satisfaction. Sometimes it happens that a woman does not want intimacy because her man does not satisfy her. Many ladies have encountered this problem. If a woman does not get what she expects from her husband, then she will not want to repeat this process over and over again. Often at the beginning of a relationship, a girl pretends that she likes everything, even if in reality she does not. But the years spent in married life are exhausting to emit pleasure every time. And refusal in this case will accompany you more and more often.
- No foreplay. Absolutely every woman needs foreplay. But, unfortunately, a man does not always understand this. Well, in this case, you will also be disappointed by your wife. If you try to start the process as quickly as possible with the onset of erection, without realizing that your wife is ready, she will not receive any pleasure, moreover, you can cause her pain and, as a result, further refusal to make love with you in the future .
- Having a lover. Your wife may also refuse to have sex with you because she already has a partner for these matters who completely suits her. It can appear either as a result of the above reasons or without them. In general, she has no problems in her intimate life, and, alas, she gets by without you.
- Husband's appearance. It happens that after some time spent in marriage, a husband neglects himself. He gains extra pounds, and his wife becomes uncomfortable going to bed with him. This fact can seriously affect a woman's cravings. Therefore, try to take care of yourself so that at least this reason can be ruled out.
- The wife's complexes. Perhaps your wife gave birth and her appearance changed, stretch marks appeared, and her stomach did not completely subside after childbirth. Or some disease could trigger weight gain. One way or another, she began to feel shy about you. Even slender girls often feel uncomfortable without clothes, what can we say about those who do not have a brilliant figure.
- Argument. Having a grudge against you may lead to a refusal to have an intimate life. Maybe you said something rude to your wife or scolded her in vain. Any such rash act could offend your lady and you will receive a refusal of intimacy in return.
As you can see, there are quite a few reasons, as mentioned above. At the same time, your wife can remain caring towards you, kind and attentive. You won't know the reason unless you take action. Best of all, this is a dialogue on frequency. Try talking to your wife. Maybe she’s sick and she’s not interested in lovemaking right now, or maybe you really offended her in some way.
Let's talk about this type of aphrodisiac in more detail.
Properly selected products are considered extremely effective stimulants for women, but even they should not be abused. Please note that excessive consumption of foods can at least affect your weight and can also cause allergies. Therefore, it is definitely not worth choosing oysters, no matter how they stimulate libido, if you are allergic to them.
A romantic dinner that is perfect for enhancing sensations during subsequent sex is a dish of asparagus, artichoke, celery, seaweed and carrots. You can also prepare a decoction of herbs and drink this drink before an intimate evening. The best stimulating plants have shown themselves to be: ginseng, angelica and aloe. However, such decoctions should be prepared either if you are really confident in the positive reaction of your own body, or on the recommendation of a specialist who will tell you how and in what quantity the remedy should be taken.
Fruits, vegetables and nuts contain many useful components, including those responsible for the physical excitability of the female body, and therefore suitable for a romantic evening: avocado, mango, banana, apple, pistachios, almost all types of nuts.
Seafood and fish meat, both white and red, are ideal for saturating the female body with the necessary hormones, filling it with nutrients, vitamins and microelements. Therefore, they should be consumed on a regular basis.
Honey and other bee products, wheat germ, natural dark chocolate, as well as parsley, cilantro, basil, rosemary, ginger root and cinnamon are well-known, useful and endlessly effective pathogens that nature gave us.
Finally, we note those stimulating foods that are recognized throughout the world as the most powerful - these are raw oysters, garlic, nuts, peaches, cod liver, celery, dark dark chocolate, bananas.
Advice from a psychologist: 6 rules of sexual desire
The main task is not to make your partner guilty, but to solve the problem. How can you return the desire for sex to your husband? An entire article is devoted to this topic.
Rule 1: Free space
There is no need to be constantly close to each other. Give yourself and your partner a breath of fresh air. If you're always together and living like twins, you simply don't have room for passion. Neither the husband nor the wife thinks about where anyone disappears; they know everything two steps ahead. You know each other too well. Give space for freedom so that at least minimal secrets appear that will interest your partner.
Rule 2: communication
Communication in family life is necessary. Including on the topic of sex. Talk about who likes what, in what position, where and what they don't like. Whisper into your loved one's ear in a soft, bewitching voice so that he will be stupefied by saying what you would like and how. Don’t be shy about it, it will bring a new zest to your life and give you new impressions.
Rule 3: variety in sex
Never avoid intimacy with your partner. This is not only a physiological need, but also an opportunity to get closer on an emotional level. Dilute sex with foreplay: massage, unexpected touches, candles, toys, kisses. All this will have a beneficial effect on your future pastime.
Rule 4: Anticipation
Add surprises to your intimate life. Try to prepare the place, atmosphere and mood for your partner in advance. Let him tremble with desire. Don't try to do it anyhow. Let him distance himself from everything that is not connected with you, and then move on to intimacy.
Rule 5: Role Playing
Play a dress up game. The husband wanted to be a policeman, let him dress like one, and as if a cop is punishing a criminal, which will be you. Having received new emotions, the charge of hormones will jump. Change the place, add any variety to your sex life.
Rule 6: warming each other up
Doesn't want sex? Warm up his desire. Instead of a regular emoticon, send an intimate photo. Create a sexual game. You will not only stir up your partner’s interest, but also diversify the gray routine of everyday life. Just as we all look forward to a vacation or weekend, a man should look forward to meeting you.
All these tips will work if you and your partner have a trusting relationship and there are genuine feelings. Don't make a fuss over a lack of intimacy. Find out the cause and eradicate it. Conflict will only make the situation worse.
Have you encountered something like this? Tell us in the comments how you got out of this situation?
What to take with you to bed?
And again about toys
We have already told you about what they are and how to choose them. Therefore, let us simply remind you: before purchasing any of them, be sure to find out the opinion of your spouse, because if she is against it, then the money will be thrown away.
Something tasty and something exciting
Eating in bed is good not only while watching your favorite TV series or as a romantic breakfast in bed, but also as an element of foreplay. Dishes with aphrodisiacs, sweetness that you will lick from each other... Who said sex can't be tasty?
Sex on silk sheets you have to try
This can be considered a cliche, but many women dream about it (even if they don’t admit it). By the way, according to a survey by the American retail chain Target Corporation, ladies most like silk sheets in black, red or blue.
A scarf can also be silk
There are several uses: you can blindfold your loved one’s eyes or hands with them, or, with her consent, tie her to the bed. Unlike handcuffs or ropes, a scarf made of this fabric will not leave marks on delicate skin. The main thing is not to tie it too tight.
Are you wearing a tie?
Alternatively, you can easily use your tie. And it will be much better if you don’t make her look for it in the depths of the closet for half an hour beforehand, but take it off yourself. And make it sexy.
Lubricant: something that will change the sensations
Even if you don't think you need a lubricant, it's still worth trying a different one. Edible, with different tastes, warming (with an exciting effect) or one with a prolonging effect. It contains anesthetics that will delay ejaculation, which means making your sex longer than usual.
What should a husband do in this case?
I remind you that first of all you need to have a conversation in a calm atmosphere. There is no need to throw accusations at your wife; you will definitely not achieve anything good by doing this. But you can push her away even more. Let's take a closer look at your possible courses of action.
- Find out the reason. This is the first thing you need to do. Because you yourself will not guess what happened. It is best to start a conversation in a cozy, homely environment.
- Take care of yourself. Go to the gym. Buy new things, don’t throw away your socks if you’ve done this before. Show your wife that you are taking care of yourself, that you are trying to look better for her. You can even change your hairstyle. New changes in you will arouse your wife's interest.
- Error correction. If the conversation with your wife went well and you found out why your wife doesn't want you. Regardless of the reason, analyze your behavior recently. Next, it will be possible to take any steps to improve the situation.
- Pay more attention. Please your wife. Give her what she has long dreamed of. Or just have a romantic dinner and buy flowers. Your wife will certainly appreciate your efforts. And the situation in bed may change in the near future.
The most important step is to identify the problem; if you manage to recognize it, then you are already halfway to success. If the situation is more complex, your wife does not want to talk to you about it, perhaps she has health problems and she is hiding it, or perhaps she is embarrassed of herself and cannot tell you about it. Then visit a psychologist, together with your wife, if, of course, you want to save the relationship and return her desire to make love to you. Experts successfully resolve problems of this kind, so don’t be shy, if you realize that you can’t cope on your own, feel free to go with your wife to a psychologist.
Drugs for stimulation from the pharmacy
Female pathogens, which are presented in a wide range in both sex shops and pharmacies, are divided into oral drugs and external agents.
The effects of arousal drugs of any type are aimed at enhancing the production of vaginal lubrication, increasing blood circulation in the genital area and increasing sensuality from touch.
The list of effective female pathogens includes:
- Preparations based on Spanish fly. The main component of the effect is cantharidin, which ensures the rapid manifestation of arousal. In addition, the product helps to get a bright, unearthly orgasm.
- Preparations based on the quebraquin plant.
- Herbal mixtures. Decoctions from such mixtures should be taken with caution, not exceeding the recommended dosage.
Strong stimulants for external use are all kinds of ointments, gels, oils and sprays.
Difficulties in communication
“Why does my wife refuse sex?” - this question is often asked when men decide to come to see a psychologist or sexologist. Some husbands have the feeling that their spouses have completely lost interest in sexual contact. Others, on the contrary, begin to suspect their significant other of cheating. Like, if she refuses to be intimate with me, it means that an insidious rival has appeared.
Both of these options are usually not true. The vast majority of women who regularly deprive their husbands of the joy of marital union do not have any deviations in the sexual sphere and have not lost love and tenderness for their chosen ones.
The reasons for such female behavior lie in something completely different. As a rule, by refusing sex, a wife shows her husband her dissatisfaction with some aspects of family life. In such families there are difficulties in communication. Instead of calmly discussing financial and everyday issues, men and women begin to accumulate mutual grievances. The result of these grievances is the excommunication of the husband from the marital bed.
Christian prayer
Praying to the Lord will help return your spouse’s desire and interest in a woman. You need to turn to God in a quiet, deserted place where no one will disturb you.
The prayer must be read repeatedly, in a quiet and confident voice, by the light of a burning candle and in front of the icon.
You can come up with any text - the main thing is that it is sincere. If you can’t compose, then you should light a fire and, looking at the smoke, whisper:
Read the prayer over the smoke of the fire.
The fire element will strengthen the energy flow and make it so that the Lord will hear the prayer.
Give compliments7
Another important aspect is whether the wife and her husband feel confident alone? Maybe she's worried about her appearance or something else, stretch marks, wrinkles. So, don’t be stingy with compliments, let your wife open up to you like a beautiful flower, say more kind words and instill in her the confidence that she is the most beautiful in the universe.
“I’m not used to talking a lot about such things, but for me for five/ten/two years (underline as appropriate) you have been the ideal of beauty,” banal? Don't worry, all beautiful and pleasant things are banal. And yes, it’s difficult to overdo it with complements. So don't worry about that either.
Create the right mood
You can be sure that your wife will love you more and enjoy you more and more if you create the right mood. Here you need to consider what she likes and how she likes to get pleasure. This knowledge will help you create the perfect setting for a romantic night. For example, you can dim the lighting and put in scented candles. A warm bath with foam or bath salts is ideal. You can also add some rose petals there. The water should not be too hot or cold, as then it will hardly be possible to achieve pleasant sensations.
Help your lady into the bath with you, sit next to her, look into her eyes, say a few gentle words and kiss her. Another important point is pleasant, quiet music, which will help create a romantic atmosphere. The main thing is that it is not loud or annoying.
How to make sex with your beloved bright and unforgettable8
If the problems in bed were due to the husband’s passivity, then all the cards are in his hands, let him try for the sake of family happiness. Here are some simple but effective tips that will help make sex unforgettable and your sex life bright and passionate.
- find out about her fantasies and desires, provoke your beloved into a romantic, frank conversation.
- pay special attention to caresses and her arousal, because often the problem lies in the fact that the wife simply does not have time to reach orgasm.
- experiment in bed, because with age a woman’s sexual appetites only grow, and what seemed to her like dirty debauchery two years ago will now be exactly what was missing to achieve the brightest orgasm of her life?
How to tell if your wife wants a threesome
There are 2 main types of women - those with conservative views and those who are psychologically liberated. If your wife belongs to the first type, you shouldn’t even try to start a conversation about a threesome.
This will end in scandal or divorce.
All the tricks suggested below work only with women of the second type. But the husband will have to work hard to find out whether his wife is ready to make his fantasies come true.
- Conversations on the topic. It is suggested that you discuss an abstract situation with your wife without “trying it on” for yourself. If your spouse gets involved in the conversation, you can jokingly invite her to fantasize and “savour” group intimacy.
- Pictures +18 (MFM or MMF). Accidentally forget a photo with a “strawberry” on your desktop and watch your wife’s reaction. If such things cause disgust, the woman will cause a scandal. If not, it’s worth developing the situation further.
- Provocation. You can go with your wife to a frivolous party and give her the opportunity to flirt with other men. Uninhibited behavior is a hint that the spouse is not alien to secret desires.
- A drunk woman is more outspoken. Taking advantage of the moment, the husband will easily “test the waters” and understand whether the wife is ready to discuss the topic of the third party in bed. A romantic evening with wine, passionate love and a frank conversation... That's it.
Read: 12 signs that will help you understand if a woman has come
What should a man do?
You should not blame your wife for the current situation, since a woman’s lack of sexual desire is not her fault, but a consequence of existing problems.
What do we have to do:
- Find out the reason . You won’t be able to guess on your own the real reasons for your wife’s refusal to have sex. The simplest thing you can do is ask her directly. The conversation should begin in private in a relaxed atmosphere, perhaps over a nice dinner or glass of wine. There is no need to make claims and blame. During the conversation, it is necessary to clarify that you care about her emotional state and want to improve sexual relationships in order to improve family life.
- Correct mistakes . If the conversation was successful, the wife probably expressed the reasons for her coldness in bed. Whatever the reasons for refusing sex, you should analyze your behavior and take steps to solve the problem.
- Remove some of her responsibilities . To give your wife more time to rest, you need to take on some household responsibilities: cleaning the apartment, taking care of the children, and even taking out the trash. The wife will certainly appreciate such an impulse.
- Take care of yourself . Get a new hairstyle, join a gym, change your clothing style - pleasant changes will arouse your wife’s interest and make your husband more attractive in her eyes.
- Pamper her and give her attention . Flowers, gifts, compliments - all this will let your wife know that she is loved and desired. Often, a man stops paying attention to his partner as soon as the sweet-bouquet period in the relationship ends. However, it is precisely such little things as a bouquet of flowers, a massage and cute gifts that give a woman a feeling of happiness and love. A satisfied wife rarely refuses to please her husband with sex or oral sex.
- Diversify your sex life . Over the years, sex begins to resemble a mechanical performance of “marital duty” and becomes a rather boring activity. In order for intimacy to turn from everyday life into a long-awaited event for a wife, it is necessary to introduce variety: oral caresses from the husband, new interesting positions, long sensual foreplay. It wouldn’t hurt to ask your wife what exactly she wants in bed, ask her about her erotic fantasies and bring them to life.
Important ! A romantic trip together or just a weekend getaway for the two of you in a hotel or out of town will help rekindle the fire in your relationship.
cosmeticon.ru
Rules for reading conspiracies for sexual desire
If a mistake is made during the ritual, this can result in major problems for the fortuneteller: loss of sleep, deterioration in well-being, headaches.
To avoid consequences, you must adhere to the following recommendations:
- Read the spell at any time of the day, unless otherwise indicated in the instructions.
- Learn the text by heart, pronounce it loudly and clearly, without hesitation. It is forbidden to swap phrases and add expressions of your own.
- Do not tell anyone about the ritual, do magic in complete solitude and silence.
The main requirement is faith in yourself and your own strengths. If a woman doubts the result, then nothing will work out for her.
Reasons for not wanting intimacy
If a husband does not want intimacy with his wife, what should he do? He has no attraction either physically or emotionally. The most common reason is household routine.
Psychology says: a man’s sexual interest can disappear because of a trivial matter.
Let us list the reasons for the lack of desire.
Reason 1: external unattractiveness
A guy meets a girl he likes. After marriage, women often neglect themselves, and their appearance leaves much to be desired. The guy is not satisfied with this, and he goes in search of a more attractive girl.
Reason 2: family quarrel
Any family conflict kills men's desire for intimacy. Sexual attraction goes away with it.
Reason 3: overprotection
This problem is quite relevant. With overprotection, a guy stops feeling like a man; he feels like a little child being looked after by his mother.
Reason 4: boring sex
Sex has become commonplace and uninteresting, without innovation or experimentation. Subsequently, interest in the partner is lost due to the lack of impressions, which a man needs to feed.
Reason 5: pregnancy
A man begins to experience fear of intimacy with his pregnant wife for fear of harming the baby on a subconscious level.
Reason 6: psychological overload
Men do not like to share their problems with others. They suppress them and experience them alone. As a result, they experience emotional overload, which has a bad effect on their intimate life.
Reason 7: disease or pathology
It happens that there is a physiological feature of the body. Sexual desire may decrease due to an infectious disease. Alcoholism, mental problems, disorders in the endocrine system, and age can also affect a decrease in desire.
Reason 8: having a mistress
Why doesn't a husband want a wife? The reason for this may be a mistress on the side who will fully satisfy his needs. To understand whether your husband is cheating on you or not, read this topic. If you think that a man does not have a mistress on his side, then this sign should not be taken into account.
Where does passion go?
In fact, the factors that greatly influence physical attraction and constant maintenance of the spark in a relationship are very banal and ordinary.
Perhaps the novelty has worn off, or you and your wife are tired of work, children, social life, and you have no time or energy left for lovemaking.- Perhaps you're not in the mood because you're unhappy with your body or appearance, or because you're experiencing some other difficulty in your relationship.
- Additionally, your sex life may be declining due to psychological factors, chronic illness, medications, depression, or addiction. The number of possible reasons is almost endless.
It's important to understand the bottom: Whatever the reason, it is important to understand that bringing intimacy back into your marriage is necessary, because only in very rare cases can building a healthy relationship be possible without this component.
With all this in mind, sex can be a rather challenging aspect of your life. It is beautiful, funny, unique and enjoyable, but on top of all that, it is associated with self-esteem, emotions, intimacy, health and personal history.
You may think of it as just fun, but it could be the central cause of tension in your relationship. A lack of passion, sex and intimacy can be the downfall of a marriage unless both partners have a low sex drive.
Unfortunately, when it comes to sex, it's very easy to fall into a vicious circle: it's hard to want sex without emotional intimacy, and it's hard to maintain an emotional connection without physical attraction. In short, the less happy you are, the less you want sex, and the less sex you have, the more unhappy you are in your relationship.
What to do in such a seemingly hopeless situation?
First of all, analyze yourself. It is very important to understand why you and your wife still don’t want sex, as it was before, to find the root cause. This topic was given special attention in one of the articles already published earlier. In addition, you can find other tips that will help not only revitalize intimacy, but also strengthen your marriage. You can read this material here.
Advice from a psychologist: 6 rules of sexual desire
The main task is not to make your partner guilty, but to solve the problem. How can you return the desire for sex to your husband? An entire article is devoted to this topic.
Rule 1: Free space
There is no need to be constantly close to each other. Give yourself and your partner a breath of fresh air. If you're always together and living like twins, you simply don't have room for passion. Neither the husband nor the wife thinks about where anyone disappears; they know everything two steps ahead. You know each other too well. Give space for freedom so that at least minimal secrets appear that will interest your partner.
Rule 2: communication
Communication in family life is necessary. Including on the topic of sex. Talk about who likes what, in what position, where and what they don't like. Whisper into your loved one's ear in a soft, bewitching voice so that he will be stupefied by saying what you would like and how. Don’t be shy about it, it will bring a new zest to your life and give you new impressions.
Rule 3: variety in sex
Never avoid intimacy with your partner. This is not only a physiological need, but also an opportunity to get closer on an emotional level. Dilute sex with foreplay: massage, unexpected touches, candles, toys, kisses. All this will have a beneficial effect on your future pastime.
Rule 4: Anticipation
Add surprises to your intimate life. Try to prepare the place, atmosphere and mood for your partner in advance. Let him tremble with desire. Don't try to do it anyhow. Let him distance himself from everything that is not connected with you, and then move on to intimacy.
Rule 5: Role Playing
Play a dress up game. The husband wanted to be a policeman, let him dress like one, and as if a cop is punishing a criminal, which will be you. Having received new emotions, the charge of hormones will jump. Change the place, add any variety to your sex life.
Rule 6: warming each other up
Doesn't want sex? Warm up his desire. Instead of a regular emoticon, send an intimate photo. Create a sexual game. You will not only stir up your partner’s interest, but also diversify the gray routine of everyday life. Just as we all look forward to a vacation or weekend, a man should look forward to meeting you.
All these tips will work if you and your partner have a trusting relationship and there are genuine feelings. Don't make a fuss over a lack of intimacy. Find out the cause and eradicate it. Conflict will only make the situation worse.
Have you encountered something like this? Tell us in the comments how you got out of this situation?
plachu.net
What to do to make your husband want his wife badly every day. For this, love and affection alone are not enough. To make a husband want his wife every day, a strong conspiracy will help.
Prepare your spouse's favorite meat dish. Food should be hot, spiced, scalding.
I want to want a husband! Wife and husband. Family relationships. Discussion of family issues: love and jealousy, marriage and infidelity, divorce and alimony, relations between relatives
The area of emotions, their occurrence, and especially their management is the dark forest of psychology. It's impossible to want to eat a pie you don't like. One of my friends, when he was a student, unloaded a carload of bananas at a camp. Since then, the smell of bananas has made him sick. Making them fall in love again is a fantasy. It’s good that you are a woman and can deceive a man about his sexual attractiveness to you. Men simply have a “no point” in dealing with those they don’t like. Well, he doesn’t get up - that’s all! And you won't be fooled. And you can’t force it - unless you get drunk ;-))
How to solve a problem?
Now that you are aware of all the reasons why a woman does not want a man, you need to figure out how to solve this problem and what to do if you do not want to completely lose your spouse.
Steps to restore intimacy with your wife are as follows:
- Talk frankly about the reasons for the refusal. To do this, you need to choose a moment when your spouse is rested, in a good mood and in the mood for a conversation. You have known each other for a long time and can probably find the right words for a conversation. The main thing is that they do not contain reproaches and accusations, and that it does not look like an interrogation. Your tone should be calm, conducive to friendly communication. It's better to choose a casual, romantic setting where it's just the two of you, for example, at dinner or on a walk together. Ask what you can do to change the situation and hint that you are ready to do anything for your wife. Most likely, she will not refuse you to clarify the truth.
- Lighten up your spouse's busy schedule by providing all possible assistance. After all, it’s not so difficult to take on some household responsibilities, for example, vacuuming, preparing lunch or dinner, throwing things in the washing machine and hanging them after washing, etc. It will also be useful for you to periodically raise children and prepare with them homework. And, of course, do all the men’s housework: fix the sockets, hang a shelf, change the faucet, etc. Undoubtedly, your wife will appreciate such feats and want to thank you with luxurious love games.
- Look after yourself. To attract a woman's attention, it is enough to follow simple rules. Firstly, always be well-groomed - clean, shaved, smelling good, with trimmed hair and nails. Secondly, dress stylishly. Even if you replace the usual holey sweatpants with sagging knees and a drunken T-shirt with a decent home suit, you can notice how your chosen one’s attitude towards you will change. Thirdly, do not stop improving your figure. You don’t have to go to the gym or run around the stadium for this. Simple exercises in the form of pull-ups on a horizontal bar and push-ups can be performed right at home, in front of your beloved spouse, thereby arousing her interest and desire from the moving muscles. Well, spiritual development, of course, won’t hurt either, if you want to remain not only a desirable lover for your beloved , but also a pleasant interlocutor.
- Find more time to talk with the woman you love. When spouses have established trusting communication, physical attraction will be constant and uninterrupted. Ask how your day went. Listen to the problems and pressing issues that concern your wife. Discuss joint plans for the future. Talk more often on erotic topics, consult on intimate activities and get to know each other’s interests and fantasies. Flirt with your spouse - this will warm up her sexual interest.
- Let your wife feel how much she is loved and desired. This can be achieved in a few steps. Step 1. Regularly compliment her and whisper kind words in her ear. It's not at all difficult to do. And by the way, the more often you admire your wife, the more beautiful she will become. After all, she will have a real incentive to transform herself and look younger in order to continue to arouse your interest. And in addition to complimenting the external characteristics of your chosen one, do not forget to praise her talents in housework and admire her as an enviable wife and caring mother. Step 2. Unexpected pleasant surprises and cute gifts will certainly improve your lady’s mood and will not be left without a reciprocal gesture of gratitude. It is quite possible that they will have an unforgettable night of love. Therefore, do not skimp on presenting your beloved with flowers, beautiful jewelry, or just funny trinkets and sweet gifts as often as possible. And a certificate to a spa salon can generally drive any young lady crazy. Step 3. During the day, do not forget to ask by phone how your spouse is doing, and say that you miss you very much and are looking forward to meeting you to hug and kiss your beloved woman. Step 4: Ask your wife out on dates. For example, to a cafe or restaurant, to a cinema or theater, to a museum or an exhibition, to take a walk in the park or along the lake, etc. When she goes out with you, she will feel like an interesting, desirable woman and will be greatly transformed. After all, for representatives of the fair sex it is important to demonstrate themselves next to their beloved man in the best possible way; for this they put on makeup, dress up, and do incredible hairstyles - just so that others will notice that she is with her gentleman. Remember that if such signs of attention are not comes from the husband, then sooner or later a replacement may be found for him. Some interesting man will appreciate your wife and can easily take you away from the marital bedroom.
- Regularly take care of the woman you love. Morning coffee in bed, evening massage, lunch delivery to work, fluffed pillows before bed, raspberry tea during a cold - such simple little things evoke pleasant responses in the souls of girls and a desire to be even closer to their chosen one.
- Diversify your intimate life and surprise your spouse with new erotic techniques and sexual caresses. But such an experiment also needs the right moment. It is unlikely that your wife’s excessive fatigue or bad mood will play into your hands. Therefore, it is better to prepare in advance. Relax your woman with a warm bath, a massage and a light dinner, and then get down to business. A few compliments and affectionate whispers with gentle touches will set her in the right mood. Passionate kisses and hugs with proper stimulation of the erogenous zones will ignite a truly hot fire. And then the matter will remain small.
Remember that every situation has a way out. And don’t despair if your wife rarely shows sexual interest, much less look for a replacement for her. Better use these tips, and the result will not take long to arrive.
The best aphrodisiac foods
Aphrodisiacs owe their name to the goddess of love, Aphrodite, revered in Ancient Greece.
A properly adjusted diet will help increase a woman’s sexual activity. The effect of special products is associated with their influence on increasing blood flow to the pelvic organs, which helps to increase their sensitivity. The following can be distinguished:
- The generally recognized leaders in this rating are red and black caviar, oysters, mussels, shrimp, squid, octopus and other inhabitants of the deep sea.
- Dark chocolate increases endorphin levels, which gives a feeling of relaxation and pleasure.
- Fruits and berries - avocado, mango, pomegranates, citrus fruits, figs, cherries supply the body with vitamins and phytohormones. Bananas and pineapples - sources of serotonin and potassium - increase the level of pleasure, contain the enzyme bromelain, which increases desire.
- Celery has long been a valuable product on this list. It improves blood circulation and increases libido. Used for salads and drinks.
- Another effective recipe for a “hot” lunch is any nuts, seeds and honey. They are rich in minerals and can enhance sexual function.
- Herbal aphrodisiacs deserve special attention. These include tonic and strengthening stimulants lemon balm and angelica, and damiana, which improves the functioning of the genital organs.
- Among the spices, cayenne pepper stands out, which speeds up metabolism, dilates blood vessels, and fills the body with energy.
The use of aphrodisiac products in combination with moderate physical activity normalizes hormonal levels, charges a person with the energy he needs, and has a beneficial effect on the functioning of all organs.
Music and sounds
Everyone knows that a man loves with his eyes, and a woman with her ears. A woman's arousal is associated with her sound perception.
Scientists have found that the hormone dopamine is responsible for a woman’s sexual pleasure. Its synthesis can be stimulated by many musical melodies. In addition, the result of research conducted at the Montreal Institute was the confirmation of cause-and-effect relationships in some subjects between listening to optimistic and rhythmic music and vasodilation. This process helps to increase blood flow, and, therefore, a rush of blood to all organs, which is reflected in increased desire.
Experts from the American Maryland Institute came to the conclusion that each stage of a romantic evening needs its own music: for foreplay - gentle lyrical compositions, for sexual intercourse - exciting energetic rock. The anticipation of orgasm requires a fast musical tempo. It helps to increase blood pressure and heart rate, which brings climax closer.
Music that evokes aesthetic pleasure can awaken libido. And some sounds - a low male voice, words spoken in a whisper, rapid breathing, the sound of rain, the sound of the sea tide - return us to nature, help awaken animal instincts. According to scientists, sounds affect the part of the brain responsible for emotions and stimulate the production of hormones that increase desire. Therefore, every woman has musical “buttons”, when “turned on” they can give her sexual pleasure.
A woman refusing sex to a man – what’s the problem?
To begin with, my dear girls, I will remind you of the essence of the problem. I have already touched on this briefly in the second part of the article “Typical female mistakes. Part 2: about women's responsibility to men." There are two points here: physical and psychological.
Orgasm for a man is like a painkiller
As for “physics,” perhaps I’ll tell you a secret, but the lack of sex (read orgasm) in an excited man is not the same as in a woman, and this is a real problem. The typical female phrase “darling, just wait until tomorrow”, apparently, originates in the female body, which much more easily tolerates the absence of sex here and now. To understand what this phrase means for a man, imagine that you ran to the dentist with an acute toothache, there is a line in the corridor, and the doctor himself calmly declares: “Dear, I have an appointment until the evening, wait until tomorrow!” Don't believe me? Ask a man. So, as a man, I responsibly declare to you :))) The lack of orgasm in an excited man is a real problem for him. And if he hasn’t had sex for a long time (read – more than 3 days), he is constantly excited. And you don’t need to make half an hour of lovemaking with him to get him into an excited state. If you met him, especially in a confined space, and even more so alone, you know: he is already excited... Not to mention holding hands, hugging and kissing. So, girls, don't judge yourself. If you need to be kissed from head to toe for an hour for you to feel the first signs of desire, then his intimate organ may become covered with moisture on the way to you...
So, for a man, tolerating the resulting sexual tension is akin to enduring pain. By the way, if you are well versed in the structure of the male body, then you know that men are not as resistant to pain as women...
Arousal without orgasm – pain and prostatitis
The next point is medical difficulties. This may be news to you, but in the short term, an aroused man who has not experienced an orgasm will experience, at a minimum, aching in the testicles and lower abdomen, and, at a maximum, the most specific pain. But, I hope you know that pain in a man’s balls is something you wouldn’t wish on your enemy... And in the long term, such situations lead to the well-known prostatitis and other troubles of the urogenital tract.
Perhaps you are now recalling legends about monks and other spiritually growing men who abstain from sex for months and years? And they don’t seem to have brain fog from the absence of a woman, pain in the balls and prostatitis. I haven’t personally interacted with these guys, but I suspect that’s true. And I will tell you the secret of monastic abstinence:
A MAN IS ABLE TO TEND EVEN LONG-TERM SEXUAL ABSTINENCE ONLY IF HE AVOIDS SITUATIONS OF SEXUAL Arousal.
That is, abstinence without arousal is not a problem. But abstinence in case of excitement is another problem. That is why monks live in solitude, separately from women, and generally try not to enter into communication with them again - so as not to get excited. And therefore, dear readers, I again ask you to be inspired by the thought that I already voiced in the second part of the article:
ORGASM FOR AN HORNY MAN IS NOT PLEASURE, BUT FIRST AID.
Denied sex = rejected
Next, as for the psychological component of refusal to have sex. I’ll give you an example, I think everything will become clear. Imagine that you have a friend, relative or some other close person who told you: “Katya, the doors of my house are always open for you, I’m always glad to see you, come visit any time after 19, without calling " Well, you were driving by, you had an extra hour, you decided to visit a friend, bought some goodies and rang the doorbell. And a friend comes out to meet you with a sullen expression, saying something like, “Well, what’s the matter? I’m busy, and anyway, no one invited you here,” and slams the door in your face. How will you feel in this situation? I just imagined that it made me feel uncomfortable... So, a categorical refusal of sex to a man evokes similar feelings in him. He came with an open soul to a woman who, as he thought, was always happy to see him... This really hurts, hurts a man’s pride and hits his self-esteem. So, girls, remember:
DENYING YOUR MAN INCLUSION HURTS HIS ENVIRONMENT AND STRIKES HIS SELF-ESTEEM.
Denial of sex is the path to male infidelity
So, a man who hoped to experience the joy of love and affection with his woman and was disappointed feels:
- the desire to relieve sexual tension as quickly as possible, and this is the only thing he thinks about now;
- aching and pain in the abdomen and genitals after prolonged and unrelieved tension;
- humiliation and insult.
What do you think men do in this case? Someone retires and masturbates (I’ll tell you another secret: neither 50 squats, nor a cold shower, nor the sublimation of sexual energy into higher chakras will help. Sublimation only works on a daily basis and in the long term, but not when the need arises...). And someone is looking for someone who will not reject him. And the more often you screw up your man about sex, the less he will want to masturbate and the more he will want to find another woman. Maybe for the evening, or maybe for good...
Look how it happens (TV series “Always Say Always-7”). True, here we are talking not only about sex, but in general about the romantic component and a woman’s attitude towards her, but the essence is, in general, the same. The husband decided to celebrate his anniversary with his wife, approached her beautifully, and she shaved him off. Well, guess what the man’s next steps are in this situation...
So, dear reader, if it seems to you that your man has another woman, think: were you the one who helped him in his search for her, constantly breaking him off in sex...
Another option is that a man can try to take a woman by force. As you probably already understand, this is also a consequence of a woman’s erroneous actions, and we’ll talk about this in the next article.
I hope I have revealed the essence of the problem. Let's move on to the women's area of responsibility.
Sport increases libido
Most people who go to the gym think about sex, say sociologists from the United States. A quarter of respondents admitted that they had already had sex at the gym. And nearly 70% of women surveyed fantasized about sex with their personal trainer. Those who had not yet been lucky enough to meet a potential sexual partner hoped that this might happen. Every tenth person took a condom with him to training just in case. 82% of people were motivated by going to the gym to use mobile dating apps. Experts say: this fact can be explained from a scientific point of view.
Previous research has shown that exercise releases serotonin and dopamine in the brain. These are neurotransmitters that improve emotional well-being and increase libido.
How to help your loved one
1. Watch your appearance. Refusal of intimacy may have reasons that women keep silent about due to their delicacy. Some men should make an appointment with the dentist to get rid of bad breath. Someone needs to consult a dermatologist who will solve the problem of acne and pimples.
Article on the topic
Deception in the name of love. Why do ladies fake orgasms?
2. Take on some of the household chores. If the wife does not receive the help of her husband, her fatigue will negatively affect the couple's intimate life. Some men still divide housework into men's and women's, even if their spouse works equally with them and makes a significant contribution to the family budget.
3. Don't neglect affection. If a wife refuses intimacy, this does not mean at all that she does not want sex. It is likely that she would like intimacy to be preceded by gentle foreplay. It is important for a woman that a man conquers her again and again, so that he never gets tired of admiring her.
4. Show your wife signs of attention. Sometimes wives simply do not have enough attention: flowers, passionate hugs, compliments, admiring glances.