Female pickup - lessons, tips, rules for female pickup artists

The “science” of seducing the opposite sex, which emerged in our time, was the prerogative of exclusively men. But this complex of seduction techniques and skills has become interesting to modern women. The only difference is that the task of a woman’s pickup, as a rule, is not one-time pleasure, but the search for true love and the desire to become attractive, self-confident and desirable.

What are the basic rules of female pickup? How to behave if you really like a man? Psychologists and coaches from COLADY magazine answer .

Photo by Pxhere

Female pickup - dating rules

Psychologists have named working techniques for female pickup.

Control your behavior : the look of a hungry wolf is prohibited. All potential suitors run away from him like devils from incense. Act as if this is just your celebration of life, and you, so be it, allow them to participate in this celebration.
Don't look for your happiness with your girlfriend hand in hand . Two huntresses are even worse. Better is loneliness, not burdened by longing for men (for example, you are alone at a table, leafing through a book or watching the news on the Internet) or the company of men.
Don't overdo it with an inviting look. A man may appreciate it as your availability. But you’re not looking for such glory for yourself, are you? A woman’s gaze should beckon and, at the same time, keep her at a safe distance.
There is nothing worse than a dissatisfied, intoxicated and emboldened woman. Know your sweet spot in alcohol . Avoid vulgarity in words, looks and movements. No matter how much you would like it to look very attractive, it is not.
Don't be a yoke around your potential boyfriend's neck. Communicate equally with everyone, but pay a little more attention to him than to others. He should be the hunter, not you. In any case, he must sincerely believe in it.
Learn the art of touch . Your touch should give him goosebumps. Even light physical contact can cause a stronger storm of emotions than, for example, a striptease on a bar counter.
Learn to love yourself - become interesting, beautiful and unconventional just for yourself. A confident woman invariably attracts men.
Your first step towards a man should look like a subtle signal . Let him think that he is the one who initiated the acquaintance.
Decide what you expect from dating . Do you want adventure, a whirlwind romance, just to tickle your nerves, or a quiet family life in the end?

funny

Even funny advances towards girls can impress your chosen one. It's no secret that the fair sex appreciates a good sense of humor, so funny phrases can work to their advantage.

Your parents aren't bakers? Then where did they get such a baby?
I Googled “find my soul mate” and it brought you up.
They called from heaven and said that their most charming angel had run away, but I didn’t give you up.
You are like an execution in the Middle Ages - many people lose their heads from you.
My phone broke down, the repairman said that one component was missing, do you know what? Your number.
We're not socks, but we'd make a great pair.
Are you, by any chance, Google? Because you have everything I was looking for.
I hope the police aren't around because I want to steal your heart.
May I know your name? I want to introduce it along with my last name.
Is your name Igor, by any chance? Me neither, we have so much in common.
Of course, I am not ice, but next to you I melt.
Do you have a thread to start our relationship right here?
You can be the cure for Alzheimer's because you will never be forgotten.
You are like a hundred that you lose in an old jacket - when I found you, I became happy.
I'm not a whirlpool, but you would be sucked in.
Sorry, I think I dropped something—my jaw—at the sight of you.
I see your lips are lonely. Let's introduce them to mine?
Does your mother need a son-in-law?
What program does Larisa Guzeeva host?
I wanted to compare you to a jewel, but you sparkle even brighter than a diamond.
When God created you, he showed everything he was capable of.
My mom thinks I'm gay. Can you help me prove her wrong?
I'm participating in a competition from Orbit called "Fresh Kiss". Can you help me win?
You are like the Internet, which is always in short supply.
Are you, by any chance, a magnet? Then why is he so drawn to you?
Today on TV they showed how the brightest star fell. Aren't you in pain?
Choose, either you marry me, or I will marry you.
You're so hot the devils in hell are sweating.
I don't play sports, but I would run after you.
You are like a second sock - I have been looking for you for so long.

How a woman should behave in order to please a man - says psychologist and sexologist Dmitry Sobolev

Getting a man to like you is, of course, great, but you need to understand why you need it. Understanding the goal is really important because... Men are different and their needs are also different. Some people want to meet for a serious relationship, while others want to meet someone who is not at all serious. These are initially different approaches to arousing a man’s sympathy for you. In addition, every man needs a different amplitude of female demonstration. Some people need serious relationships, others “easy” meetings. In each of these groups there are representatives for whom some slight hint is enough and the man will see this as a light bulb to which he can respond. And others need heavy artillery. And it doesn’t matter if they are looking for a woman for a serious relationship or for something easy.

Here the question may arise: why use light hints if you can immediately use heavy artillery and not miss? But not everything is as easy as it might seem. If you launch heavy artillery at a man who does not need it, then it may not result in attraction, but in rejection.

In order for a man to choose a woman for a serious relationship, it is impossible to reveal all these parameters to him in one demonstration. A man studies a woman for a certain period of time before he begins to consider her as a candidate for a permanent partner. Accordingly, talking about “here and now”, “let me show you myself, and you will melt and invite me into a serious relationship” is wrong.

The only thing you can count on during initial contacts is the man’s interest in you.

It is important to understand that if you show a man your availability, then interest in you will certainly disappear.

If we look at the mating dance of many animals, including humans, it looks like a series of cycles of attraction and repulsion, during which different emotions arise. If you want to interest a man, then do not count on the fact that you, all so beautiful, will appear in front of him, he will be blinded by beauty and will want to live with you on a permanent basis. No! He will want this only when he recognizes you based on a number of parameters, and this is a whole chess game. This is not “here and now.”

At the first meetings, you can claim the man’s interest, the response of his libido, his desire. It is important to be feminine, but not to overdo it with brightness. A man may perceive excessive brightness differently than you need. It's important to get interested. If you open a tap with hot and cold water, from which it will pour in full, this is not interesting.

Serve yourself in portions. Then there will be interest, there will be a desire to get to know you. A man's interest can be aroused by the mating dance of attraction and repulsion. Attraction - you make contact. Pushing away - you allow the man to take the initiative.

Don’t agree to everything - make it clear that “I’m not ready for everything, I don’t agree to everything, I’m interesting.” Let him conquer you - this is also his interest. If you handle this dance skillfully, and this skill comes with practice, with experience, then it will look harmonious and natural.

Don't try to make yourself someone, don't try to remake yourself for the sake of someone. Men are all different and you won’t be perfect for everyone. Even if you manage to create some image that is not typical for you, then the man will still choose not here and now, but for a long time. You will get tired of not being yourself, the whole plan will be revealed and broken. You are a girl, you are a woman. Let a man be a man for you. Be interested in his thoughts, his emotions, his desires, his life. Be interested in a man.

The main thing is the right frame4

Another concept that is written about in pickup books is the frame - the context of what is happening. For example, if you approached a girl and asked “what is this lovely person...” no, this is not a pick-up artist. It's not original. They asked, “Have you seen two planes flying across the sky at the same time?” I didn’t think about it, but if you want, then...”

You need to constantly change the context and under no circumstances play by the girl’s rules in a conversation. Plus, it is advisable to perceive what is happening as if it were a computer game, and if you are rejected, then you can simply reboot and go on looking for luck.

Does it work? Yes, all of this is really extremely effective and gives the desired results, so why is there so much criticism of the pickup truck and so many unfortunate pickup artists who are given less often than ordinary guys?

How to please a man - 4 effective techniques from psychologist and sexologist Anna Tur

The common opinion that a girl should not be the first to meet someone has long gone into oblivion, but the saying about a lying stone under which water does not flow remains relevant to this day.

Don’t think that a woman’s first step is a sign of bad taste or impudence. This is far from true. Perhaps there is already mutual sympathy between two people of the opposite sex, and the man does not dare to act first. Then you need to help him decide to take more active actions, acting like a truly wise woman.

How can you draw a man’s attention to yourself and interest him?

Remove the Snow Queen's mask. Don't walk around with a sour face. Girls with a cheerful expression on their faces will attract a man faster than those with a proud and unapproachable look. By smiling, you show a man that you are open to dating. And with the help of your gaze, you will unambiguously show the object of your sympathy that you are interested in him, and thereby provoke initiative. You just need to meet your eyes several times and quickly look away. It’s just that usually a man can’t quite understand your call the first time and think what he imagined.
You can get interested in actions . For example, approach a man in a cafe and say that you lost an argument with a friend and, according to the terms of the bet, you must take his phone number. Or come up to give a compliment, but not to him. For example, if he walks the dog, then his dog. You can admire his originality in choosing a dish or wine. You can praise the model of his phone or the book he is reading. Men love praise and women who can appreciate their achievements.
What a woman is wearing, how she looks and how she smells - the decisive first impression and interest of a man depends on these points . Do not choose clothes that are too revealing or vulgar. This attracts quick contact seekers. The same applies to makeup; many men are put off by excessively bright makeup. You should always look like a winner of men's hearts. A woman's confidence in her irresistibility is very attractive to most men!
Contact the man with some harmless request or question. If a conversation starts, don’t drag it out and try not to talk about yourself, listen more. You must remain a mystery for a man to want to meet you again. Don't be upset if a man doesn't make contact with you, maybe he's already taken or just not your type.

How to get a gentleman into your networks7

Saying a person's name several times during a conversation can help you create an emotional connection. You can also repeat the gestures of your interlocutor, which will best position your partner towards you and allow him to be more open psychologically, even if he is unsure of himself. But you should not abuse this technique, so that the effective technique does not turn into complete copying.

Oddly enough, many men are insecure and are often afraid of new acquaintances. Indeed, almost 40 percent of the stronger sex feel uncomfortable on the first date. You should also try to exclude gestures and behavior that demonstrate disinterest in the guy, because if your companion is already unsure of himself, and then on a subconscious level he incorrectly perceives the signals of your body, then consider the matter lost.

How to find the key to a man’s heart - says psychologist Alexander Zimin

I propose to look at the female pickup truck from a psychological perspective.

There is a law - people will be together if they have common beliefs, interests and emotional intimacy.

It's like a key and a lock. If two people match these criteria, no dating techniques are needed. And if they don’t match, then even a magic “love spell” won’t help—they’ll run away.

Situation - you liked the person. What exactly do you like about it? How does he make decisions, his ideas and worldview? Or maybe you and he have common goals and interests? Or is there some kind of chemistry, bodily attraction? Maybe you like its smell and willingly empathize with the same thing?

Take a piece of paper and draw your psychological portrait. Let these be the answers to the questions:

What is important and valuable to me, what are my principles?
What am I interested in, what business am I ready to share with my chosen one?
What do I like - smells, colors, how I express feelings?

Have you written? Great. Now make exactly the same sign but only for him.

Reconnaissance is the key to success not only in military operations. Find out everything you can about him. What does he believe in, what motivates him, what interests him and what does he love? Did you manage to make a sign for him? Great. Now you have in your hands a map of the two of you as one system. Look at what needs to be done to make it stronger and more stable. Where might there be conflicts, or risk of getting bored?

The information received will be useful for understanding your future relationships.

What does pickup guru Eric von Markowic think?3

Another famous seduction guru, Eric von Markowicz, formulated the “principle of a man’s high value for reproduction and survival.” The guy must be physically healthy, and look appropriate, athletic body, all that, this is for reproduction.

And to survive, he must have leadership qualities and a desire for victory, preferably accompanied by a career and an expensive car. Lol.

And all this against the backdrop of total self-confidence. But success should not be intrusive, like, look, there’s my car, you see, I have biceps, you know, I can buy a yacht. The boasting of girls is actually repulsive, showing a lack of attention and a man’s lack of self-confidence, which in turn means the low value of a male.

Basic rules of female pickup

The purpose of a pickup truck is to provoke a man to take active action. The result depends on the desire - a short date, a close acquaintance on a horizontal plane, or a serious relationship and starting a family. The “science” of pickup can be learned either independently or through special training.

Pexels Photos

What are the basic rules of female pickup?

Go out more often , expand your circle of acquaintances.
Have you set your sights on a handsome blue-eyed athlete? Don't look for it in the library. For an oligarch? You definitely won’t find him in the diner around the corner.
Always be ready to meet your dreams . An ideal appearance, excellent mood and a charming smile should be your constant companions.
Learn the basics of proper makeup , you should look stunning even when you run out to take out the trash - moderate but effective makeup, heels (stilettos), neckline, tight dress, well-groomed hands. Get used to following this rule even at home (when no one sees you). See summer makeup rules.
Study male psychology . With this knowledge, it will be easier for you to predict the behavior of men and choose your one and only one among them.
Be sweet, friendly and independent . Act as calm and relaxed as possible. Leave embarrassment and excitement for other situations, here - only composure and self-confidence.
Your speech should be smooth and calm . No “nerve” in the voice.
Don't get confused with words . Listen carefully as if this fishing story is the most amazing thing you have ever heard. Don't forget about subtle, "accidental" touches.
Don't talk about your problems (home-work-family) and your desires. A man should have a clear feeling that you are a successful, happy and completely satisfied person with life. And, of course, avoid questions about the number of your ex-men or marriages. It is unlikely that a man will be happy to learn that you are just looking for a candidate for your fourth marriage.
Don't forget to praise your man . Men are like children, they need to feel needed, loved and extraordinary. Just don’t overdo it - you shouldn’t praise your gentleman for a nice tie or clean shoes, you need to praise him for his actions.
Be modest . There is no need to put your feet on the table, sweep away dinner at a restaurant in a minute, put on a vulgar dress and demand a trip to the Seychelles. Modesty always decorates.
When communicating with a man, try to repeat his gestures, movements and manner of speech . This technique is one of the main ones in a pickup truck. Just don’t get carried away – it shouldn’t be obvious.
If you are invited to dance, you should not be too frank in your movements - that is, hang on to the gentleman and press your whole body. Even if your head is already spinning from his strong hands and close breathing, control yourself and wait until the “client matures.”
Manicure and makeup should be as natural and minimal as possible . Avoid red varnish right away - it makes you nervous. Too long nails are also not an option. The only thing that will have a magical effect on a man is shiny lips.
Expand your circle of hobbies and discover new talents. Learn to play billiards, shoot, change tires, dance and cook.
Never be the first to admit your crush.
After meeting, do not be intrusive. It is he who should look for you, call you and make appointments. And you just condescendingly accept his advances.
Don't hang a kilogram of jewelry on yourself. It’s better to have one or two decorations, but spectacular and of high quality, than to look like a Christmas tree.
Do not go too far in your facial expressions and “erotic” movements. It is enough to straighten your hair, lick your lips and cross your legs. You should not wag your hips or swallow bananas.
Don't tell yourself and don't let a man tell dirty jokes.
Having met that same man, you should not continue the “pickup artist games” . A man should love you, not your seduction technique. You won't be able to keep him close to you for the rest of your life.

Basic rules

Before you start seducing, you need to study the basic rules of “hunting a male” and follow them unconditionally:

Appearance. Appearance should be more than just stylish or attractive. It should be aimed at men. Restrained sexuality, the absence of awkward but fashionable elements in the image and total adherence to the rules of hygiene. Neat manicure, clean hair, ironed clothes, shiny shoes. A woman should shine.
Mood . A negative attitude is reflected in our face and movements. Therefore, it is important to “catch the wave” before leaving the house. Your wrinkles on your forehead at a moment of thoughtfulness, pursed lips or clasped hands will scare men away, hinting at a bad mood.
Inaccessibility .
If a woman resembles an arrogant queen, men will admire her from afar. They will simply be afraid of being rejected and will prefer to start a conversation with more friendly and open people.

The ideal female pick-up artist is the one who...

Loves and respects himself.
Not aggressive, but proactive. Independent.
Relaxed and free in relationships.
He doesn’t carry around a suitcase of complexes.
Understands a man and accepts him for who he is.
Knows how to give pleasure.

Photo by Pexels
Any woman is already a natural pick-up artist. In fact, she does not need to learn the science of seduction at all, because nature has already given her all the tools for this. All that remains is to use them competently and wisely. And the main thing is to understand what exactly are you waiting for? Imagine that all the men are paying attention to you, salivating and dreaming of at least holding your hand. Are you sure you need this? Or do you still dream of meeting your future, one and only man?

When turning to trainings and plunging into the science of seduction, be sure to realize that the level of male attention to you will increase. And decide for yourself whether you want it or not.

Technicians

What is the sequence of actions:

It is necessary to appear in the field of vision of a man. This needs to be done before you even start interacting. This way, the object of seduction will be able to switch his attention to you easily and without tension.
The next step is invading your personal zone. Try to get closer to your “victim”, leaving a distance of half a meter. This area is carefully guarded and everyone tries to keep their distance. But if a guy doesn't move away, it means he's completely focused on you.
Now openers or templates prepared in advance are used. Try to calculate the course of events and your chosen one’s reaction options so as not to get confused at the most crucial moment.

Romantic

To create a romantic atmosphere when meeting, use touching and sweet phrases. With their help, you can beautifully propose to meet a girl you have liked for a long time.

I need sunglasses because the brightest sun is looking at me.
Bonjour, beautiful milady, With one eye seeing you, I realized that I had never seen beauty in this world before you.
Why does everyone say that the best place on Earth is the resorts, because I feel better than anyone next to you.
Finally my deepest wish came true, because I found you
I would like to be your tears, to be born in your eyes, to live on your cheeks and to die on your lips.
Are you, by any chance, a camera person? Because when I look at you, I start smiling.
Can you touch me? I want to tell my friends that I touched an angel.
I never believed in love at first sight until I saw you.
Is there an airport somewhere nearby or is it my heart beating at the sight of you?
The alphabet begins with ABC, Numbers begin with 123, Notes begin with do-re-mi, and love begins with you and me.
If I were a cat, I would spend all 9 of my lives with you.
You look like my fourth girlfriend. By the way, I had three of them.
Your eyes are like a door to another world that I want to be a part of.
If every time I thought of you a star fell from the sky, the moon would already be lonely.
We didn't meet in class? I'm sure there is chemistry between us.
If it were possible to remake the alphabet, I would put the letters of my name and your name next to each other.
Could you tell me the route? I need the shortest route to your heart.
I'm not asthmatic, but when I look at your photos, I forget how to breathe.
The morning dawn would be even more beautiful if you woke up in my arms.
Only now, having seen your photo, I realized what “butterflies in the stomach” means.
You will be my first, but you may be my last.
You look sad, but I will be the best moment of your day.
You are the only sea in which my instinct of self-preservation is zero, and when I drown in you, I go to the bottom with a smile.
My love for you is like the Universe - it is also endless.
If I had the opportunity to live my life again, I would have found you even earlier and loved you even longer.
There is one thing about the solar system that you need to know, and that is that my world revolves around you.
Let's flip a coin: heads - I kiss you, tails - you kiss me.
My love for you is an axiom, because it does not need to be proven.
Help me write the script for our happily ever after.
You are so beautiful that all words flew out of my head.

Vulgar

To create the role of a tough guy, you can use vulgar hits on girls, some of which may even be too tough. We offer 30 dirty jokes that can be used online and in life.

Glasses fit well on my face, but yours would fit better.
Girl, you are very beautiful, and beautiful girls need to be multiplied.
Do you like to sleep? Maybe we can sleep together?
If your right leg was Thursday and your left leg was Saturday, then I would fly to you on Friday.
I wanted to send you something sexy, but you are not in my gallery.
Are you by any chance serving in the army? Because when I saw you, some part of me stood at attention.
Let's save water. Shall we take a shower together?
Even though you are not a deck of cards, I could still lay you out on the table.
Guess the riddle: there are four legs, but they do not have the most beautiful girl in the world. The answer is my bed. Do you want to fix this?
You are not ice, but you will definitely flow in my hands.
Let's study physics and test the force of friction.
You'll scream at me louder than a roller coaster.
When I saw you, I remembered the school assignment from the board - I also want to take a photo and do it all at home.
They say a girl needs 30 seconds to size up a guy. It takes me the same amount to cum. Maybe let's not waste a minute and combine these processes?
Do you know what is the difference between you and the session? I'll be praised if I fail you.
Let's do some math: add the bed, subtract the clothes, separate the legs, and multiply.
Are your lips as sweet as they look from the outside?
I'm not a music box, but you turned me on.
Of course, I'm not a trampoline, but I'm sure you'd like to jump on me.
Say your name so I can scream it at night.
There must be a clock on my forehead because every time I see you, you turn me on.
If you were stuck in a washing machine, I would be happy to help you get out.
You're damn attractive in that dress, but I'd take it a step further.
I saw you in my dreams, you did indecent things and promised to repeat it.
I will hide all the chairs in the world so you can sit on my face.
Are you, by any chance, a coffee mug? I just want you every morning.
Of course, I’m not an elevator person, but I’d love to take you up and down.
Your legs are like Oreos - the tastiest thing is in the middle.
I'm not hinting at anything, but today I ate two pineapples.
Do you want to try the Australian kiss? It's like French, but a little lower.